I Want To Be Skinnier - Tumblr Posts

Anyone else avoiding weighing themselves right now cause they ate?

Lunch today ✨

I let myself have a banana since I worked out this morning 😌✨

My problem with working out is that it makes me need to eat more after to recover and I know the calories cancel out but it still feels like I’m cheating ya know?

Like if I go a whole day not eating I feel so happy, but if I do a really intense workout and eat something small it feels like I failed somehow. Even though realistically that’s probably better because I’m toning my body and losing weight.

I was sober for 3 days and restricting and doing well, then last night I drank 4 glasses of whiskey and ordered a pizza and I woke up this morning to AN EMPTY PIZZA BOX. My fat drunk ass ate an entire pizza. Yeah that’s motivation enough for me to stay sober now guys.

Cleaned my room instead of eating and now I feel motivated and inspired to be better this month! Just keeping busy and distracted is the key y’all! 😌✨

Had a really nice and productive day. Not eating really makes me target other areas of my life that I can fix 😌✨

Buying this scale right now. I’ve been using one that only tells me my weight, and this review sold me immediately 😭

My coworker asked me how much I weigh and I was about to freak out but then she said I look really small and guessed that I weigh 110 (which is crazy because I definitely don’t look like I weigh that little) and then I had to lie and say

“oh I honestly have no idea how much I weigh.”

As if my psycho ass didn’t weigh myself twice today.

Walked for an hour. Losing weight, toning my body, getting a dopamine rush, getting a tan & having a socially acceptable excuse for losing a bunch of weight!

“Oh I’ve just been walking and running a lot. That’s why I’m so thin 😉😏😇”

Went in to work to get my check and they asked what I was doing today

I said I was gonna go grocery shopping, and my coworker said, “what?! You’re actually gonna eat?!”

First of all, rude. Second, yes. I’m gonna eat pickles, cucumbers and 50 cal salad & I need to restock my diet coke bitch 🫠

I think the universe is on my side guys.

Last night I drank wine and my drunk ass decided to order food (which would have totaled 800 cals !!!!!)

But I fell asleep before it got here and I woke up to find it outside ripped apart by the neighborhood cats

So I got saved from the calories and fed some kitties!

And I woke up one pound lighter 😇✨

🍓Lunch 🍋

I went to the drugstore on my break at work to buy the super low cal soup they usually have for lunch but they were out so I spent 15 mins panicking and reading labels and everything was too high calorie &

I felt like people were watching me read all the labels so I got overwhelmed &

Now this is my lunch &

I’m honestly pretty happy with it 😇

Finally broke below 130! I’m 129.5 pounds!!!

I’m trying to remember not to celebrate reaching goal weights by eating or drinking alcohol this time.

The goal weight is the reward!

I repeat:

The goal weight is the reward!!

Jesus, I definitely shouldn’t have run two miles in this heat on an empty stomach. Literally started to pass out in the middle of the street just now 💀

I was with my bestfriend all day yesterday and she made me eat THREE FULL MEALS.

My stomach literally hurt so bad because I’m not used to eating that much. I was so sad.

But somehow I maintained my weight. Like I didn’t gain even a little 🤭

So it’s back to my bullshit today 🫡

As long as I’m 129 by July that means I’m losing 10 pounds a month 🤷🏼‍♀️

Getting skinny and hot and confident is the only thing that could possibly save the depressing shitshow that my life is becoming.

Like, I genuinely can’t imagine a future with me in it if I’m not thinner and prettier. Like being skinny is not even the actual THING I really want. It’s just the only possible first step I can take to like…

…want to live in general?

How am I supposed to want things if I’m ugly and lazy and useless?

Good things only happen to skinny/pretty people.

Don’t let your brain trick or convince you. Some people can pull off being normal sized or even thick. But they’re charismatic and witty and flirty and bold.

You are not.

Your fat sits awkwardly, not in a sexy curvy way.

You aren’t confident.

You fumble your words.

You are too shy, too embarrassed.

You hide from and even push away any care, affection or interest.

People will think you are gross and too depressed unless you are hot and thin.

You need to be skinny so people care.

The hot charismatic flirty people don’t have any reason to care about or even acknowledge you unless you are thin.

Don’t be fooled.

You need to be skinny.

My next date with my new man isn’t for a week.

I’m sad cause I want to see him like, NOW.

But I’m secretly glad cause I have 7 days to starve and get hotter. 🫡

Back on my bullshit. I’m fluctuating between 125 and 128 and I refuse to go back to 130. I have a boyfriend now.

I need to be thinner for him.

I need him to worry about me.

It’s like, I can’t vocalize or talk about all my shit, so he needs to see it physically.

I’m not eating today. At all.

Let’s go gang! We can do it!

Broke below 125. Literally I’m barely trying. I’m just stressed & need my boyfriend to see physical evidence of it, so I don’t have to vocalize it. Idk. But ayooo at least I’m getting skinniiii ✨🥰