Millenium - Tumblr Posts - Page 3
I can make him disappear for you, Hans
Major: Ah yes... I feel like it's all perfect! It's all going according to plan and I look good today too!
Hans:
Hans, breaking the silence for the first time: You should eat make-up. Maybe it helps getting pretty from the inside. The outside is... unlucky.
lol
Hellsing Vine Compilation #2
Enjoy you Protestant fuckbuckets
Hellsing Vine Compilation XD
So I did a trend on tiktok. It's called
"characters singing snowman"
I don't know if I it right though.
So I did a trend on tiktok. It's called
"characters singing snowman"
I don't know if I it right though.
What the AT&T lady said just didn’t register. Brad called to cancel the landline not get a new plan.
Brad put the receiver down to ask Chris. “Do we want ‘full coverage?!?’….”
Now that Brad said it out loud, the notion read nearly silly. A fierce 45 second single sided debate ensued.
Chris said if they were going to hold on to any unnecessary technology, it would be the wristwatch due to its advanced mobility feature.
Total peace broke out when Brad noted wristwatches didn’t take $50 out of their Chime account on the 5th of every month.
Boom.
Brad and Chris’ landline would finally die, die the next business day.
ok, so listen.
Wow, that's not shitpost?
Actually I'm big Doc`s fan. And I have many headcanons about him. Especially about his family. 1. His grandmother from Russia. Her name is Lyudmila Malinova. She ran away with her future husband, Michael, to Germany because her parents wanted her to marry someone she despised. 2. His father is Jonathan Harker. Yes, the same Jonathan who saved his wife with Abraham Van Helsing from Dracula! Sometimes there are coincidences, isn`t it? However, Doc doesn't really remember him, Jonathan died when Doc was less than a month old. By the way, Jonathan and Mina had children before Mina turned into a vampire again (because someone didn`t finish off Dracula), but that's another story. 3. Doc and Major have an age difference of ten years. And they known each other for a long time. Literally since Max was born. Max's parents knew Doc's mother. And when Max killed his mother at the age of thirteen, and his father died of alcohol poisoning, Erica was given the opportunity to take custody of the orphaned child. 4. Schrödinger is Doc's biologic son. Doc had grown him artificially. In his experiment Doc used his own DNA and werewolf`s DNA. 5. Doc has uncle, aunt, and two cousins. One of them had children and grandchildren by 1999. I'll write them later.
Millenium (mostly Doc) headcanons
All Doc's nicknames: Doc, Herr Doctor, Herr Professor, "Doktor Tod", Avon, Dale, Sawboner, White-Red Snake Zorin is a hermaphrodite, she has male genitals in addition to female genitals. This explains her muscularity. During World War II, Zorin was a concentration camp prisoner. The major dragged her out and assigned her to be Doc's bodyguard. During this time, Blitz and Doc developed a friendly relationship. Major is excellent tactician and speaker, but in other areas of life, he, to put it mildly, sucks. Doc likes plants. In his office there are several pots of ficus trees. Rip's real name is Riphen Weber. "Rip Van Winkle" is a nickname. At first glance, it may seem that the Major is the main source of danger. However, in fact, it is most dangerous to anger the Doc, because his aggression quickly passes from the passive state to the active state. Everyone understands Hans perfectly without words. Doc, at least, understands exactly. Major decided to rob the Reich's treasury because he thought it was funny. Major basically does a lot of things because he thinks it's funny. In the forties, Doc had a "suicidal period" associated with his socialphobia. Now Doc has overcome this period and now he just hates everyone.
Every morning Major begins by trying to shoot himself. Why? Because it's fun!
