Day In The Life - Tumblr Posts
CHAT HELP I FELL DOWN THE STAIRS IN SCHOOL (IN FRONT OF MY FRIEND)(dude why am i freaking out so much it was like 2 steps smh) AT LIKE 16:40 (yes Americans, military time aka normal time) AND I TWISTED MY ANKLE WEIRD WHEN I FELL AND IT STILL HURTS IT'S 1AM NOW (im probs overreacting, but ya know i can't exactly yap about this to my friends)
Some of my fav pages from my art book for my art fundamentals class.
I should just drop everything and become a Victoria Secrets model.
Excuse me, what the f u c k
I’m sorry, I knew this was real, I’ve just never seen it, and it’s so funny to me
Found MY HAPPY PLACE, MOTHERFUCKER!!!! Rant Part 1: ALICE????? Damn that’s Long!
Let me just start of with DAMN!!!!!!! WHAT AN EPISODE!!!!! MOREEEEEEEEE!!!!
Ok admitting it now I was a main Queliot shipping since pretty much Season 1 episode 1 when Eliot looked Quentin up and down the he was trying to figure out which end he was going to start eating first (innuendo intended), and it only got stronger the longer I watched. Soooooooo..... I’m going to be going off about my ship but I’ll keep it to the end.
I will be the first one to say LOUDLY in fact that Alice has been one of least favorite characters since even before the series started. (No, not just because of my ship. Didn’t like even before that.) Seriously I didn’t want to even start watch at when I first saw the trailer with her in it, and ever trailer after reconfirmed my decision till I accidentally started watching it on Netflix , got a few minutes in and found out I don’t just have one female character I hated I had two Julia. My positions on Julia are now very complicated but I love watching her character arc now, even if I can’t get all the way back behind the her like I do with the others. But my very ardent dislike of both Alice and pretty much a majority of her screen time has been pretty damn the same 80% of time. Sure there are moments that I like or find cute or interesting but the pass usually rather quickly. Mostly because a majority of her character, her arc , and/or just her personalities’ tend to be prime examples of bad writing tv tropes the I have come to HATE SO MUCH. No not cliche trope cause I can like those if give the right context, though Alice isn’t anyway. I mean shortcut, cheat-codes,bullshit handed to you on a stick TV tropes that just diminish what they are trying to say to move on with the story instead of giving it what the story needs.
Until this episode... this episode I actually wanted to talk about her, and not just in an angry and annoyed rant. Well not only.... ITS PROGRESS! Further more it gave me hope that it will continue.
Alice.........................(Starting Mainly focused on Character , then Relationships)
One of the few times I was actually fully invested in her story in that wasn’t based on any other character in a positive light was when the group go to Plovers house, and they discover the truth. So it only makes sense that the episode that makes me hopeful for her story going further starts with her and Plover. (Side note: I have seen people say Quentin calling back to Plover, being his favorite author is him trying to lessen what Plovers crime’s but I don’t see that way. But since its a Quentin focus that really does have to do with Alice; I’ll get into that later.) Her argument with Plover about his sins and her point of view on of he can’t be trusted to get what he wants let only deserve it goes as a really interesting rhythm to her and Q interactions. Though I really don’t know how I feel about the comparing of those to two. Especially considering the thing Q is stonewalling her about isn’t even the killing and torturing of creature some even children, but the betrayal and Plovers is sexually assaulting a child. But to address her question; No, I don’t think her sending Plover to the Poison Room makes her worse or better. Its one of those things that everybody has a different answer but no one knows what they would do till it happens. Her sending him to him “Death” (She didn’t lock it and we didn’t see him die, ok.) IS understandable. The thing I think that might, MIGHT put a tally in the worse column is that she didn’t stop to ask that question until Q’s reaction to her reveal. Only made worse by the way she revealed. Like she wanted a metal, reward or a pat on her head for it. (Which actually took a hit about the one thing she had going for me that the other characters didn’t, her independence. Even in her most dependent moments; she loved Q, but he was never her crutch.) But it moved on quickly from that so it wasn’t so bad.
Now on to the relationships..... I loved this episode in case you can’t tell, but what I loved most about this episode was what it did for the relationships. Yes I said RELATIONSHIPSSSSSS, plural, that right all of them. What it closed what it open, put in focus ALL OF IT especially what those relationship did or will do for the characters. But this rant is about Alice’s relationships (YES mostly Quentin because most of her relationship are Quentin or Quentin by Proxy). So let’s talk.
I should probably say that I love that the group (Quentin, Julia and by exception if nothing else: the rest of the questers.) have forgiven her, and don’t want her around. No that is not just Alice hate. It’s freeing in a way and it one of the thing that gives me hope about being further invested in her story arc. I don’t actually want or think they should forgive her or let only trust her, not yet at least. For one, she hasn’t actually apologized. Two, she hasn’t in any way actually shown she thought her actions were wrong, all she gave is justifications and I’m sorry I caused this because of my action not I’m sorry for my action, which is one of the main reasons everybody is pissed at her, her action not just the unforeseen thing she had no way of predicting. I have seen a lot of people saying Q should have forgive her like he forgave Julia, since she did basically the same thing. But the way I saw and interpreted this actually different. I am not really Julia-apologist with the view that she can do no wrong and is completely justified. In fact as previously stated I started off hating her just as much sometimes more than Alice and now I do generally enjoy her story and seeing where it goes along with her adorable moments, mostly with Q I still can’t bring myself to like her. (Mostly for what she did to Q in that one episode.. You all know the one. But that’s for a Julia centered rant.) But it actually isn’t the same thing.
Sure when if you strip down the story to the most basic detail sure it has similar lines. One of the group does something betraying or otherwise and the rest of them if not the world/worlds end up having to pay for the backlash and its all that characters fault. I HATE when stories do this, and so many do. They strip down the details to make one person/group understandable or forgivable to another because they kinda sorta did the same thing expect for all the important stuff but ignore all that. No, the the devil really is in the details. They are IMPORTANT. The how, why, when, where are actually very important, not just the what. If they weren’t you wouldn’t bother spending money and time showing them to me and I wouldn’t care. I call it FUN-HOUSE EFFECT. I HATE IT, SSSSSOOOOO MUCH. It is BAD writing and it’s everywhere, even in really good shows, shows I love. Which just made that more excited about the writer not take the easy way out with Alice. Because that is what the Fun-House Effect is the easy way out, instead of the right way. The right way where forgiveness is a journey to get through no a detestation to move on from, and no I don’t mean a redemption arc. Though I do love a good one. I would like to point out it they’re not always the same thing. It cheapens all involve the origin sin oh now I understand sin along with the forgiveness sin along with all the feelings involve. Especially, because when writer use it to get the forgiveness the character and the story plot involved or driving by it don’t get what makes it all worth the pain, closure and since they never really get it in the story we never really feel it. I mean think about it this way just because two song about the same thing does mean they are the same and like any song it should be able to justify itself on it’s own. Putting them side by side or together in mash-up of any kind should enhance them both not diminish them. If it does it bad writing in a song or a story. I’m probably getting to carried away with the bad examples, and I’m totally getting carried away with my Fun-House rant.
Like I was saying sure in its most basic forum it’s one character goes against the group and/or does something stupid and all of them if not the rest of the school/kingdom/world/worlds has to deal with the backlash of that person/people’s action. Everybody else when they made their stupid/selfish/selfless ‘betrayal’ it was them putting themselves or someone else before the group/world by making a different decision but that was their choice. Even if it meant going against the others. Josh when he ran back to Brakebills, Penny when he sold out Quentin to be expelled, Julia when she took the knife or, Kady when she took the battery, Eliot when he shot the Monster, even Margo with the Fairy deal, Quentin when he didn’t help Julia ,they all made choices that they put in front other people’s and those people were mad and then forgiven it was a journey to some and understandable to others. Wrong, selfish and/or stupid choices they were but they all made them but the one thing they didn’t do is try and take away their choices and Alice tried to do that. Kady said best herself last season Alice doesn’t get to make that choices for everybody. In fact Alice made her choices she didn’t trust herself around magic, that’s why she and took the Memory Potion that was her putting her self above and before everyone (And actually her explaining it to is one of the moments I like of her in the last season and felt generally invested in), her leaving Breakbills after the whole thing with her brother her choice. What was not her choice was trying to make sure nobody had magic, because SHE thinks they don’t deserve it. To add insult to injury they were so busy trying to defend themselves from her trying to take away their choice it left them completely unprepared for what came after and just to spit in their face it turns out she took the potion so she wouldn’t have to face the consciences of said action. And she only trying to make up for the insult. That’s one of the main difference in situation about everything else.
Other points as follows;
Quentin and everybody already didn’t trust her when they let her in on the quest after discovering she was working with the Library but they gave her the benefit of the doubt because of what and who she to them (Mainly Quentin) before without her expressing anything learned or changed trying to take their choice away and give control to the Library. And oh look she changed her method but she still fucking tried to take their and everybody’s choice away about magic. Different plan same objective.It makes total sense that not only would they not forgive or even try understanding anymore even more so considering that they were all trying to do that before even going as far as to not want her help. I mean if someone who had tried to take away my choice while ‘helping’ before tried to ‘help’ me again in any way I would shut that shit down as fast as possible. So I loved the show’s reaction to her. Even more I love what I think it means for her next. Growth for Alice in a positive way, which don’t think she actually had.
Alice herself hasn’t grown in a positive way like all the other character. If anything thing happen to and/or around Alice beside for some and I do mean some aspects of her relationship with Quentin almost always went negatively toward Alice’s character. Her discovering what happened to her brother, her parents, dying, killing the Beast become a Niffin, coming back to life, being without magic, being around Quentin, Not being around Quentin, getting Julia’s spark, almost dying again, having to give up Julia’s spark, her dad dying, her trying to find her knowledge of magic again, making a deal with the library, breaking a deal with the library, destroying the keys all of it in a negative way. Just when you think it couldn’t go deeper into worse she gets a magically shovel and starts digging, Hell even the supposed good parts, with Quentin are linked with how bad that relationship was at the start and how toxic it became.
With Quentin very much shutting the book on them, it gives me chills with where her character can go. What I see come to her. Connection not related to Quentin. Like previously hinted at when talking about her independence, Q was her connection not her crutch. Which is maybe the one thing that their ship has above the others to me in a positive point separate some of the other main ships in the show, even platonic friendship ones and it has a negative impact on one if not both. Do they grow and become better somehow to sometimes, depends on the ships and situation sure. But you take those to and they get better apart. One of those main bad writing tropes that is all over Alice is that they never have her make a connection outside of Quentin. Even the moments she has with almost all the other characters is only happening because of Quentin indirectly or not. Now with Quentin and her at a close(thank god) she can hopefully start making other connection and those connections can help her grow like the others’ connections have helped them grow and change in both bad and GOOD ways.So she can finally get to a person she wants to be, again. Not the same person because that Alice is dead and gone and has been for a while. (Took you long enough to see and accept it, Coldwater.)
Hopefully Our Lady of the Tree or Underground send my hope to the writers.
Some highlights of yesterdays river trip
• letting the fish suck at our skin. When they felt safe, we had over ten fish each on our hands! Creating a momentary symbiotic relationship. Trust in nature
• a kid in the family by us yelling “we are all connected!!” (Referring to their tubes, but true)
• we were skipping rocks, and then the groups near us began skipping rocks. It was such a sweet human moment
• the feeling of drizzling rain on already wet skin.
•we somehow chose the best fruit ever. Seriously the cantaloupe MELTED in my mouth. The cherries were so dark and sweet.
•getting to watch Aleric in his element (fishing)
•looking up at the caves along the cliff face, the same ones I imagined climbing into as a little girl.
•we got to see lots of cool bugs !!
There’s more (there always is :3) , but I have to pee! And this caption is long enough
Oh my god it's like 6:30 am and the substitute bus driver, Phil, is flirting with the guy on dispatch, Doug.
I ship it.
Live blogging my day because I'm bored: Part 1
So far ...
I've come in to a mountain of crap to do at work because the person I jobshare with is useless (seriously this is why I'm my bosses favourite.)
My chair is broken so I keep inadvertently doing the sinking chair gag from Trojan.
And my boss called me kiddo, which was sweet but I do not need daddy vibes from you today Graham* thank you.
(*Not real names, I'm not an idiot.)
Live blogging my day because I'm bored: Part 2
Now sitting in a supermarket car park on lunch listening to Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers.
Two cigarettes in and wondering if I actually want the food I brought.
Still bitter that I planned to use the fact we needed milk this morning as an excuse for a smoke break but some woman from HR beat me to it (STAY IN YOUR LANE HELEN!)
A very very pessimistic rant
6/1/24: "And who are you, Victoria Spring? I can’t think of anything to say because that is what my answer would be really. Nothing. I am a vacuum. I am a void. I am nothing." - Alice Oseman
I wish I had anything interesting about my life. Literally everybody is part of some sort of community (fandoms, pride, social groups,etc) and I don't have anything similar. I wish had an excuse for this, but I really really don't, I can socialize with people fairly easily, but I have one friend. So my second option is to join a fanbase but I'm not nearly interested enough in anything currently going on. Anything I am invested in has a dead community. So my third option is to connect to people who are trans, but fucking NOBODY is trans and I cant connect with people online because only the trans people who are happy and successful seem to be online. I don't think other people see the world the same way I do.
I wish I was part something it doesn't even have to be bigger than myself. Literally just a genuine connection or shared a genuine appreciation with someone.
Its not even that the connections I have are bad, its just not enough.
Love you, poet
Just A Shitty Day
6/2/24:“There’s a time and a place for being normal. For most people, normal is a default. But for some, like you and me, normal is something we have to bring out, like putting on a suit for a posh dinner.”- Alice Oseman
I had no motivation to do anything today. I didn't even watch T.V I literally did nothing today, I wanted to write a short story but I couldn't find my laptop. It would have been somewhat bearable if I slept or just scrolled all day, but I just didn't do anything.
Radio Silence folks.
Love you,
poet
Sushi and ice cream for dinner ˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗
