Unhappiness - Tumblr Posts

Bakmayın etrafımda çok insan dolandığına. oysa ki sırılsıklam yalnızım aslında..

Hayat işte. yüreği yorgun olan herkes yalnızlığını sırtlanıp gidiyor bir yerlere ve hiç kimse de dönüp sormuyor işte bu yalnızlığın sebebi ne diye..

why can saddness be so inviting, when happiness can be so revolting?

On Unhappiness

this year has not started off well. i am distinctly unhappy. also i don't think i'm going to get everything done tomorrow.

And There We Were All In One Place

and by that i mean actually i was sitting alone in my car parked at the boat launch and singing to American Pie and kind of falling apart

i don't know what's wrong with me and my mother keeps trying to have a serious what's wrong? talk. but anyways today was three more tests and suddenly being sick and five hours of rehearsal which is actually the shortest it's been all week but still miserable because people are not nice. so i was driving home, and Don McClean came on the radio just as I started crossing the bridge home to my island, and I pulled over at the boat launch.

i think it was just stress and memories and everything at once but i just kept having flashes of ctyers as we were at cty and that song and us yelling and just being together and being safe and loved and together and invincible. i miss learning for the sake of wanting to know things and not having to feel bad about it. i miss a lot, and right now everything is stressful. so i just kind of sat there crying and looking at the water and it's the first time i remember being by that bridge on my favorite spot and not being comforted, because instead i was just struck by how alone i felt. even though i know i have friends here who i love dearly and this is why i write nice things about them and i know this is miserably melodramatic of me but so be it.

kind of like how tomorrow i'm going to want to be somewhere else while we work on sets for 12 hours. but anyways. point being, it might be a while before i work my way through my posts about people. cause i gotta get my act together. this is absurd.