Someone Actually Teach Me How To Sew - Tumblr Posts
Sewing Lessons
Today, the clasp to my skirt broke.
For the first time in years,
I had to relearn how to sew.
Mother didn’t want to teach me
even though her hands were not yet trembling
Something in me guessed that it was
the same excuse she used for cooking.
The last time I weaved a thread through the needle
was 4 years ago in that 4-lesson class.
The teacher by my side gave me a scandalous look
as I followed all the wrong steps,
even with her guidance and advice.
I was never cut out with the virtue of patience;
just shitty poetry, and dumb writings.
Searching YouTube did not help;
nor did my mother become any more willing to teach.
My father was out somewhere in the world again
and my sibling was worse off than me.
Frustrated, I could only think of
the basic knot, needle and thread,
pushing through thick fabric
hoping I’d get it right.
A month ago, I was faced with a challenge.
Today, the clasp to my skirt broke again.
I know my mother can sew,
because I’ve seen her many knots in my dress.
But maybe, that’s just my amateur hands
poked with needle holes and a hope that
one day, it won’t be a month
before the thread snaps and breaks again.
I just wish I wasn’t this useless
because all the girls know how to make it stick.
But every single month I get
the irritating clasp that breaks.
They can boast and brag about their achievements
While I sit in the shadows
because they can do all of the things
that I cannot handle to achieve
at the level they do.
My mother asked me why I love YouTube.
maybe it’s ‘cause unlike what she should do
I learn how to sew and put on foundation there,
even though I’m laughed at and ridiculed.
its the shittiest application those girls’ve seen
but god damn it, at least someone could teach
them all these things;
I still don’t know how to cook more than 3 things
yet somehow I have to worry about skincare
and lipstick and makeup, and
some days I want to curl up and disappear
some days I accept I’ll never look prettier
and some days I will try to be there and better.
But god damn it,
will someone give me sewing lessons,
so I can learn so much better?