Polyamorous Aroace - Tumblr Posts

The struggles real, am I right?

Being polyamorous while also being aroace has been the most confusing shit of my life. I just wanna vibe in a polycule and I want to feel cared for. I feel cared for my friends at the moment, so I’m okay now, but it’d be nice in the future, cause I don’t wanna live alone. I really shoulda known I was aro though....like the signs were so obvious...and ace even more obvious. I am glad though that I basically embody chaos at this point.

It is super annoying. I'm sex/romance oscillating, and I am still in a relationship as well as polyamorous. My experiences as an aroace entity aren't rendered null and void just because I have the audacity to feel Great Value sexual and romantic attraction (at a SUPER watered down level, mind you, but it's still present). Grey aroaces exist, people who may fit one label but use another exist, people who are straight up aroace and still have partners exist, etc et-fucking-cetera and it's so frustrating for people to erase us. People need to realize that aroace being a spectrum doesn't mean that people will fit into a linear category just 'spectrumized', because surprise, surprise, we're all individuals with our own experiences!

As an AroAce person who's in a polycule, it's actually really isolating how I'm seen. To some AroAces, I'm not AroAce enough. To Allos, I'm not AroAce enough or Allo enough. I have nowhere to fit in because I'm not sex/romance-averse and despise romance/sex with all my being.

I feel like I have no community because I'm steadily realizing I might just be full AroAce and not Grey AroAce. I haven't experienced romantic attraction outside of my two partner systems and I got with when I was a teenager, and even then, I've never felt sexual attraction to them.

And I could only imagine how isolated my partner must feel, since he's Sex/Romance-Averse and still in a romantic relationship.

And it doesn't help that we have blogs basically calling us "Bad AroAces" because we like ship art and fanfiction. We're looked down on because we like ships and fanfic that resembles our experiences as AroAce individuals.

We shouldn't have to fit in a box to be "enough" to you.

We're AroAce, end of.

🧡💛🤍🩵💙

THIS POST IS ABOUT AROACES, NOT ALL ASPEC IDENTITIES, PLEASE DO NOT DERAIL!

Give me more lesbians who date men too, who aren't MISERABLE and forcing themselves to do so because of compulsory heterosexuality. Give me more lesbians who ARE men: cis, trans, somewhere in between, both, neither. Give me gay men who also date women happily, who are women themselves to whatever extent. Give me queerplatonic relationships between a gay guy and a lesbian. Give me a lesbian and a gay guy who are friends with benefits. Give me multigender turigirls and lesboys. Give me an individual who is polyamorous and aroace, more gaybians, more nondysphoric trans people, more she/her guys and he/him women, more it/its and nounself users, more queer teens who go by Arson. I could go on and on, but to sum things up: give me the sides of the queer experience that are hidden even by other queer people. Show me the box breaking, the line crossing, the beautiful complexities that arise from being queer. Give me the 'cringy' identities. Give me the historical identities that people are trying to erase. Preserve what they're trying to snuff out.

to the people commenting and reblogging saying that while they don't understand some of the experiences listed they still support them, thank you. It means so much to see people be accepting of identities they don't understand, instead of screaming at me or other people for existing/supporting the existence of more obscure queer experiences. Your support means so much more than you realize. Again, thank you.

Give me more lesbians who date men too, who aren't MISERABLE and forcing themselves to do so because of compulsory heterosexuality. Give me more lesbians who ARE men: cis, trans, somewhere in between, both, neither. Give me gay men who also date women happily, who are women themselves to whatever extent. Give me queerplatonic relationships between a gay guy and a lesbian. Give me a lesbian and a gay guy who are friends with benefits. Give me multigender turigirls and lesboys. Give me an individual who is polyamorous and aroace, more gaybians, more nondysphoric trans people, more she/her guys and he/him women, more it/its and nounself users, more queer teens who go by Arson. I could go on and on, but to sum things up: give me the sides of the queer experience that are hidden even by other queer people. Show me the box breaking, the line crossing, the beautiful complexities that arise from being queer. Give me the 'cringy' identities. Give me the historical identities that people are trying to erase. Preserve what they're trying to snuff out.