My Heart Hurts - Tumblr Posts
@godsdefied ( tama tonga) gets a small lyric starter from nikki bella.
you take my hand and say you've changed, but boy you know you're beggin' don't fool me because to you it's just a game, you know it's just a little too late.
how the fuck am i supposed to act like a normal functional human being when The Character exists
"I'm still pretty without showing off my body" -Moonbyul
That’s why I love her
jungkook’s birthday countdown — his love for his hyungs and how much they mean to him ♡
This honestly made me tear up, a 17 year old engene named zika has passed away in gaza. this breaks my heart deeply. she was a fan just like us with dreams to one day see the boys. please try your best to spread her letter so it can possibly reach the boys!
@021894s @dr0wnme0ut @yvnempire @un06 @hee-dazed @heejake-hoon @karinasbaby @en-geneisaxx @enh4s @dollyyun @goldenretrieverjakezgirlbaby @slickchickchocolatier @yeonzzzn @urfavouriteanon @stickypiratepeach @j3nnypng @hoondrop @hoonharem @simpjaes @heeverseblog @heeslomll @jakesangel @acestuffs @dazed-enha @ikeuluvr @ikeuhoonverse
MY BOIIISSSSSS
ENHYPEN HIGHSNOBIETY JAPAN ISSUE 13
friday nights || byun baekhyun
1:34 AM 250424
word count: longer than i expected
pairing: byun baekhyun x reader (ft. im changkyun)
description: baekhyun ignores you for an entire week, and you don’t know why.
genre: bestfriends to lovers!au, jealous!baekhyun, mutual pining, angst-ish, fluff after lmao
a/n: kinda rushed ending (?) lmk if you guys want a part 2 or a longer version!
You and Baekhyun have been best friends ever since you both got stood up by your dates on prom night. You vividly remember Baekhyun’s reaction as your dates began making out in the middle of the dancefloor, leaving you both partnerless — and almost miserable. So, you invited him that exact moment to ditch the night and have some fun of your own, basically and invitation to sit on the gutter as you eat your melting ice cream.
But, that was a story for another time - now you’re in your third year of college. Your friendship’s been that long, and you swore, the last time you checked, the platonic energy between the both of you was almost tangible. Although you had a moments when romantic thoughts about him invaded your mind.
You swore it were mere milliseconds, though – and that you didn’t think about how his hands could perfectly fit in yours and, how sweet his lips would’ve tasted like. Nothing of that sort, really. You knew that the both of you were awfully platonic, and nothing more. You didn’t want to entertain thoughts of you and him together romantically, because it would never happen. Plus, you went out on a date last week.
You and Changkyun were totally hitting it off. And you would’ve told Baekhyun about him, but he’s been ignoring you for the past 5 days. No calls, texts, nothing. Everytime you’d visit him on his breaks, he’s always be out, or busy, or just not in the mood — which rarely happened.
So, you planned to corner him into telling you what’s wrong. You really had no clue, but you’ve got a feeling that it had something to do with you. It was your break, and you checked your phone for Baekhyun’s schedule. You both exchanged schedules the beginning of the semester, which is also probably why he’d been successful in avoiding you.
There was an overlap between your schedules. His class would end at around the same time as yours would start. But you were really determined to know what the hell’s wrong you could just be late to class for a couple of minutes. And after a long, painful wait — catch him, you did.
He walked out with two of his friends, who you knew as Minseok and Jongdae. It was Minseok who spotted you first. He called Baekhyun and pointed at your direction.
“Hey, Y/N.” Minseok waved at you, and so did Jongdae. You smiled and waved back as Baekhyun’s eyes widened.
“Go on first, I’ll catch up later.” He told his friends, his eyes avoiding your gaze. The two walked off after saying goodbye.
“What are you doing here?” Baekhyun held your arm, gently pulling you to the side.
“You were avoiding me for a week, what’s up?” You asked, eyeing him carefully. He reached to the nape of his neck. He removed his cap, fixed his hair, and put it back again.
“I… wasn’t avoiding you,” he said, still avoiding your eyes. You weren’t convinced, so you pulled his face to meet yours.
“There, see!” you exclaimed, “you avoided my eyes again. What’s wrong, Baek?”
“Nothing,” he muttered. He glanced down his wristwatch, and urged you to move. “You’re literally five minutes late to your class, get moving dumbass.”
“No, I’m not leaving ‘til you tell me what’s wrong. Is it something I said? or did? Or, like, did something happen to your family? Come on, talk to me, don’t shut me out like this.”
You were honestly nervous, you feared that the friendship you had would be gone in a blink if you didn’t do this.
Baekhyun sighed, and met your eyes. You heart dropped to your stomach. It felt different from his usual teasing glints, there were hints of longing. His eyes glossed a little, eyes bloodshot red. You immediately reached to his face, and his eyes closed and he leaned to your touch.
“Baek,” you sighed softly, “have you not been sleeping?”
“Mmhm,” Baekhyun hummed, hand on top of your hand on his cheek. “Let’s…talk later.” His eyes met yours this time.
You nodded with a soft, gentle smile. “Of course. Come over later? Let’s watch a movie tonight.” Your thumb ghosted over his cheek.
“But that’s for Friday?”
You swore you saw Baekhyun frown a little from the loss of touch as you retreat your hand from his cheek, but you decided you were just crazy and that it wasn’t like that.
You shrug, hands on your pocket. “We could do it like, two days earlier, it’s fine.”
“Why? So you could ditch on me and go on a date again?” He blurted out.
You audibly gasp, earning stares from passerbys. Your hand flew to your open mouth. “What do you mean? I didn’t ditch you, I asked you if it was okay and you said yes!”
“I didn’t!”
“You did! I even have the text messages here if you need refreshments, dude.”
“Don’t dude me, Y/N,” Baekhyun groaned, rubbing his face roughly. It was an a look of frustration, and you felt it was directed to you.
“Is this why you’re mad at me? Because you thought I ditched you?” Your voice slightly trembled. Now you were frustrated and confused.
“No!” he abruptly said, “No, I’m - I’m not mad at you, I just, Friday nights are for us,” You internally winced, because you took that in way that isn’t how friends should take it as.
“And you — ”
“Baekhyun-ah!” You both looked at the direction of the voice. It was Junmyeon who called out with a smile as he approached you. “Oh hey, Y/N, what’s up?”
You smiled and tried to push the argument you just had at the back of your mind. “Hi, oppa.”
Baekhyun sighed, “What’s wrong, hyung?”
“I couldn’t find Chanyeol, he told me he’d be with you.” Junmyeon’s lips parted a lottle, “Did I interrupt you guys?”
“Yeah, we’re kinda bu—” You interrupted Baekhyun.
“We just finished talking, oppa,” you glance at your watch to avoid Baekhyun’s intense gaze. “I have to get to class, I’m suuuper late. See you later!” You waved Junmyeon goodbye, and turned away quickly.
You hear Baekhyun call to you as the distance grew farther. You didn’t want to lose Baekhyun over a fight like this, especially when you thought of him in a different light yet again.
~ • ~
Baekhyun’s heart broke a little as he looked at you walk away. He let out a heavy sigh as he massaged his eyebrows.
Junmyeon noticed. “Are you good?”
Baekhyun looked up at him and nodded yes. Junmyeon was not convinced though, but he decided not to push it. “Come on, let’s meet them.”
Baekhyun stayed silent. He moved on autopilot, basically just following Junmyeon’s footsteps — but not before looking back to the place you once stood at.
The guys laughed loudly in the middle of the restaurant. Baekhyun and Junmyeon settled down, “Did you get food already?” asked Junmyeon.
“We ordered pasta and pizza, you could order more if you want to, though,” Minseok said. “It’s Jongdae’s treat for missing the last get together.”
“Nice.”
The guys continued to talk, and joke around. Food kept arriving at their table, and everyone dug in except Baekhyun. He was staring at nothing, just picking on his food with a fork.
“Hyung, are you okay?” Jongin nudged Baekhyun. He looked up, and forced a smile.
“Yeah, of course.” There was a moment of silence before Chanyeol broke the ice.
“You guys remember Changkyun?” He asked. Baekhyun’s ears perked up, the name was familiar. Too familiar, in fact. His eyebrows knitted tightly, he couldn’t help it.
“What about him?” Sehun popped a fry in his mouth. Lay tilted his head slightly.
“He’s throwing a party tonight, he invited us.”
“What’s his business inviting us? We don’t even know him,” Baekhyun bitterly spat and did not go unnoticed by his friends.
Chanyeol and Junmyeon exchanged glances with Kyungsoo, who sighed and said, “We can just not go, it’s not a big deal.”
Baekhyun just drew a big sigh and ruffled his hair. To say he was pissed was an understatement. He’d been so bothered about you dating other guys, and he hated the fact that he couldn’t even tell it to you directly.
After all, you both agreed on staying strictly platonic after having witnessed your sister and her then bestfriend get married and divorced on the same year.
“What’s with you, Hyung? You rarely act this way,” Jongin asked, eyes full of concern.
Sehun snickered, “He always acts this way whenever a certain someone’s involved.”
Minseok hummed in agreement. Baekhyun groaned as Kyungsoo spoke, “You mean Y/N?”
“Precisely,” Sehun confirmed with a smirk.
“Aren’t you strictly platonic?” Jongdae asked.
“Yes.” Sadly.
“Huh, so why are you jealous?” Kyungsoo asked.
“I am not jealous.” Lie.
“You definitely are.”
“I’m not.” Yes, he was.
“You like her, don’t you?”
“What?” Yes.
“You do!”
“What are you even —“
“Someone’s got a crush —!”
“I—“
“Just admit it, Hyung!”
“N —“
“Baekhyun —“
“I love her, damn it!”
Silence filled the table. Everyone suddenly laughed out loud after his outburst — they knew you got Baekhyun fucked up in the head and they love to see it.
Now, Baekhyun’s admitted it and there was no going back. He had avoided saying it for the longest time for the fear of it “coming true” when he knew that he had no say in his feelings from the get-go.
“Just tell her, confess, do something,” Kyungsoo said.
“That’s easier said than done.”
“Would you rather lose her to Changkyun?” Lay suddenly spoke up. Baekhyun looked at him, and he knew his hyung made a point. He had to do something.
~ • ~
Time went by fast, and it’s been two days since you last saw Baekhyun. Still, no calls nor texts from Baekhyun. You were beginning to doubt your decision of avoiding the conversation — you start to think that you should’ve let him finish talking before walking out like that.
Is he gonna drop by tonight? It’s literally friday, its — its your movie night. Or is he never gonna talk to you, and you end up losing the love of your life?
Wait, no. He’s your bestfriend, so you love him, right? Its that kind of love that’s purely platonic, isn’t it? Plus, you had a date! And you totally hit it off, you swore to god.
Okay, maybe you lied. You and Changkyun were bonding over relationship traumas instead of building up a new relationship. You both had a cup of sweet tea, but the conversations you had left a bitter taste in both your mouths.
Changkyun also mentioned someone he liked, and was in fact, asking for advice. That’s why you both set another date for tomorrow, solely for the sake of advices. Besides, you also enjoyed complaining to him about Baekhyun’s annoying habits that you secretly liked.
You then pace back and forth, probably hyperventilating and on the verge of another panic attack. You bite on your nails as you watched a late night game show, or atleast tried to watch.
You couldn’t focus on it. You sat down, your knees bounced up and down. So you stood, but you kept pacing back and forth. And you’d look at the television, but would later find yourself starting at the clock. You were so immersed that you failed to notice the numerous missed phone calls.
Until the door bell rang. You sprinted towards the door, opened it in one motion.
And there he was, holding a bouquet of roses. He offered a sheepish smile, and offered up the bouquet.
You didn’t even realize you’ve been holding your breath 'til you saw him on your doorstep. You immediately engulfed him with a hug, your tears threatening to spill.
He hugged you back as he buried his face at the crook of your neck. You missed his scent, so much.
You pulled away, "I - I thought you wouldn’t — ”
He cut you off, “Don’t go.”
You look at him, confused. You wipe your tear-stained cheeks, settling your hands on his biceps. “What? What do you mean?”
“On that date,” he said, eyes intensely on yours. “Don’t go on that date, please.”
“Well, that’s for tomorrow still, I —”
“No, you don’t understand. I,” Baekhyun took a deep breath. “I don’t just mean tonight. I mean, don’t ever go on a date with another man. Please.”
You were speechless as you watched Baekhyun frown in thought, trying to compose what he wanted to say.
“I,” he paused. He looked his shoes, and licked his lips in anticipation. “I get livid when I think of another man touching you, or holding your hands, and the mere thought of you kissing someone else makes me go insane, you have no idea.
“My heart races when our fingers touch, and I can’t help but want to kiss you when you do something childish. Or when you cry because of a stupid movie — I want to grow old with you, sit under a tree and watch as our children run across the fields. I — I love you. For the longest time, I’ve loved you. I love you, Y/N.”
You were speechless and shaking. Here was the man you longed for, confessing his love to you — and you couldn’t believe it. Your jaw drops, and he looked at you with great intent.
“I love you, too,” you said, tears rolling down your cheeks. “You dumb idiot, what took you so long? I kept it all in, I waited for you for so long! I —“
He captured your lips with his in the softest way possible. A moment lingers as he pulled away,
“I’m sorry for making you wait, Y/N. I —“
You pull him back in, deepening the kiss as you hook your arms around his neck — bodies flushed against each other. He dropped the bouquet, and put his hands on your hips, pulling you closer to him.
“Shut up and kiss me, baby.” You said in between breaths and kisses.
I'm still not over my crush. 😭
WHY IS HE THE CUTEST OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
a confused cutie
Word Count: 1,309
Reader Type: Gender Neutral
Story Type: Twisted Wonderland
Beware: Angst, Mentions of Death
Summary: Everyone misses you. but Grim misses you the most.
Key terms: n/a
Rook’s Notes: I've felt pretty down lately, and this happened.
Grim looked around the spacious bedroom. He jumped onto the queen size bed and claimed his usual spot on the right side. Softly he pawed the empty pillow by him. A downhearted purr echoed through the room as his small paw patted the dusty cushion. The burning sensation itching his cyan eyes only worsen.
"I am just a kitten. Hardly fit my mittens." Grim hoarsely purred while curling up on the pillow. Laying his head on the cushion rather than his paw, "Much too small, I figure. One day I'll be bigger…"
The nonsense residents of Heartslabyul didn't have their unbirthdays as cheerful. Their desserts weren't as sweet anymore as Trey had slowly lost his sense to bake. He would often make a few treats to distract himself, but those baked goods didn't hold the same flavor as they once did. Cater continued his social appearance, but the ginger would find himself in the rose garden when left alone. He would pick roses and paint them (color), not paying mind if he got in trouble as (color) seemed so beautiful than the dreadful red or empty white. Riddle would be held up in his room most of the time. Reading to himself before speaking out loud, he stopped himself multiple times when not receiving an answer from his commentary. "One day I'll be a great big kitty cat. Uses open windows to go from flat to flat."
Savanaclaw reverted to their old ways. No more socializing with weaklings or non-beastmen. Leona rather spent time in his dorm than in the garden, claiming the grass was too itchy. The plants were damaging his senses as his eyes would water. Jack's workout routine kept him active as he continued to train. However, he would stop every once in a while to catch his breath before snapping out of his daze with a light scowl. The mischievous Ruggie didn't pull pranks as the childish acts didn't cheer his sour mood without someone to help. Even the taste of donuts was bitter when he ate alone in the cafeteria.
Azul looked at the quiet lounge and signed at the empty seat by him. The paperwork is seemingly endless without an extra hand, especially when the help would distract him when he got frustrated. Tucked away in the forest, Jade quietly hiked through nature as his eyes scanned the ground. he tilted his head slightly to look behind him but shifted his eyes back to the ground in search of mushroom, not enjoying the lone hike as he used to. Floyd stared at the ceiling of his room while the a deep frown on his face. Bringing the shrimp plush towards him, the usually mischievous boy feels more tired than normal.
As lively as the halls of Scarabia, Kalim felt void of light. He could seem to hold his smile for longer than a minute, his dormmates noticing the lack of energy when he walked the halls. Jamil lost his sense of excessing and revolted back to his tucked-away nature of being average. His dancing becomes more intense as he ignores their memories and cheers.
"I am just a kitten. Hardly fit my mittens. Much too small, I figure. One day I'll be bigger. One day I'll be all grown up and strong."
The three beauties of Pomefiore grew bored without their admiring fan. Vil didn't have the usual urge to shop and dare he say- he lost the appeal to maintain his beauty routine when he passed a mirror. Rook grew bored as the students all looked dull to him, none appealing to his standards anymore. Epel slowly lost his nerve to bother working out and bite his tongue on makeup, covering up the bags under his eyes from sleepless nights.
Keyboard keys echoed the poorly lit room while the screen flashed with bright colors. Idia emptily stared at the computer while he built his character, focusing his entire mind on making the little icon identical. Ortho sat in the corner of the room as he built a hologram. Using every part of his memory software to mimic their voice so the brothers could have comfort during their hard days.
Diasomia shut itself away once more after the dreadful day. Lilia turned from being teasing and playful to forever strict. He stop being friendly when his closest friend left him alone. The usual loud mouth Sebek turned rather quiet as days went by, being rather more reserved. The quiet Silver revolted back to his old self of being distant and focused on his Knight training, however, the dull ache in his chest would hurt when he looked towards the clock. Reminding himself that he would need to take a break after hearing the small voice that haunts him. Malleus sighed during his nightly walk. He lost interest in interacting with the student body, the need to silence the thoughts growing with each passing day after losing his companion.
"But until then, I'll just purr and sing along."
Deuce and Ace both looked at one another as they heard the feline's broken purrs. The redhead pressed his back against the doorframe while humming to the purrs. He closed his eyes while faintly hearing the words to the small lullaby in his head. The ravenette listened to his friend hum as he sat down on the floor. Every night. They would hear you sing that lullaby without fail, as silly as it was that was the only way for Grim to fall asleep. The pair knew this and it hurt. Your absence had created a great void in their hearts. In everyone's hearts.
Ramshackle hasn't felt like home. Its clean halls had collect dust over time as the common room had a cloth over the furniture for no one dared clean. The once rowdy dorm had turned muted that even the ghosts found it too eerie. All the other dorms felt the effect of the absence as time went by.
Your absence bought great grief to everyone, but Grim had to worse impact. He had all his memories with you from the best funniest ones to the scary frightening ones. The warmth that once radiated from your desk chair grew cold after a week and caused him to move to the bed. He would avoid your side as much as possible, remember how you would hold him close at night. However, he misses your arms around him. He misses listening to your heartbeat after a hard day of class.
He remembers seeing you study on your desk every day while he slacked off. The first time you sang that stupid lullaby. You were humming while writing down notes, while he ate away at his tuna. The feline ears twitched when he heard your light meowing. Tilting his head he popped up beside you, catching your attention.
"Huh? What's wrong?"
He said nothing but stare at you. A blud went off in your eyes before you picked him up and set him down on your lap, running a hand through his fur as you went back to humming. The silly song was his comfort every day and night because you would always smile while humming it.
It was your humming that bought him back when he overblobbed. It was the lullaby that woke him up when you called out to him. It was your smile that forever haunts him when remembers his jaw opening.
Grim let out a weak cry as he buried himself into your old pillow. Wishing wholeheartedly that you come back to him. Promising to the night sky that he would be better if it meant seeing you next to him. He would swear on his favorite cans of tuna that he was the good feline you proudly proclaimed.
"My little kitten.." He just wants to hear you call him one more time..
I feel this on every level!
I have 4 younger siblings! 💕💕💕
Too damn cute #EthicalMemes
Words can't describe how much i love this, it makes me miss marching season already! 💕
Luca and Alberto.