Mark Lee Au - Tumblr Posts

safety zone | l.mk

pairing ❥ mark x reader genre ❥ angst, fluff, suggestive, university! au, best friends to lovers, roommate au word count ❥ 19.1k note ❥ this was inspired by sticker teaser mark. also because he really does keep pushing the parasocial relationship agenda these days. i really hope you guys like this because it took me at least 40+ hours to get it out so it's practically my baby now playlist ❥ west coast love - emotional oranges | saturday nights - khalid | hits different - taylor swift |  shutdown - moonbyul, seori synopsis ❥ Mark Lee. The most perfect roommate and best friend that you could have asked for - except for the fact that he constantly messes up your laundry and can’t cook eggs very well. Even then, that doesn’t quite stop you from falling for him in your final year.

You suppose meeting Mark Lee was a stroke of fate. Whether good or not, you had yet to find out.

Freshman orientation, and you had just been deposited on the concrete steps of the main university building by your parents, who were quick to drive off after giving you one last hug.

And as you passed through the hallowed halls where you were meant to spend the next five years of your life, thousands of other people your age rushing past you, you were excited. That you were finally on your own, free to do quite literally whatever the fuck you wanted.

The freedom was going to go to your head, and cause you to probably make a few bad decisions, but that was a problem for later.

For now, you had to get registered. If you could even find that tiny blue booth in this gigantic place.

And as you pulled your luggage up the steps, staring at the phone screen with your other hand, you supposed it was partially your fault that you didn’t see the boy walking straight past you, and also your fault that you didn’t hear him muttering an ‘excuse me’ under his breath.

However, it was a little too late to realise that before you were sent flying to the ground, a harsh exhale of air leaving you as you hit the ground with a thump.

And as you winced in pain, you looked up, only to be met with the culprit himself.

“Shit, I’m so sorry. Went too fast.” The boy in front of you is wide-eyed, hands fisting nervously in the material of his washed out jeans, the grey plaid flannel hanging loosely over his shoulders and white-shirt. “You good?”

He extends a hand out to you, and you take it without thinking as he pulls you up. It’s a while before you collect yourself, glancing at him and not quite sure what to say.

“Um,” he scratches the back of his neck, cringing slightly. “Really sorry about that. First day here and I’m already knocking people down. I guess Hyuck was right.”

You have no idea who Hyuck is, and why he’s predicting the future for the awkward, gangly-limbed boy in front of you, but the sight of his expression makes you soften a little. He’s genuinely apologetic about it, and you suppose that beyond your ass being sore for the next two days, there hasn’t been much harm done.

“It’s okay. You’re a freshman too?” You ask, trying to break the ice a little - he seems nice enough, the kind of person who you’d smile at on campus when passing by.

At your question, he laughs a little, eyes lighting up. “Yeah. I was trying to find the registration counter before I crashed right into you.”

“Well, if you help me find it, consider this accident gone from my memory. I’m a little lost too,” you offer, and he nods eagerly. “No problem. It’s down that way, I think.”

And when he turns, motioning for you to follow, you smile. Your first friend on campus. Sort of.

“Hey, I realised I still don’t know your name,” you say, and Mystery Boy seems to hesitate for a moment, before smiling at you.

“Mark Lee. Engineering faculty. You?”

“Y/N. Early education.”

“So you wanna be a teacher?” he asks, and you shrug. “Don’t know. I’m not sure how much I like working with kids yet.”

“That’s fair. Oh, we’re here.” He halts his steps, joining the queue with you.

It’s not long before the both of you reach the front, the students being registered in pairs.

The person handling the both of you is a young-looking guy, and his nametag reads Jung Jaehyun. When he smiles, his dimples are obvious, and you find yourself relaxing a little.

“Registration documents, please. We’ll get this done quickly,” he says, quickly scanning the papers that you and Mark hand over.

“You’ll be staying in the dorms for the first semester, and then afterwards, you can either do rental on your own, or off-campus housing. Any ideas yet?” Jaehyun asks, and you motion for Mark to go first.

“Um, rental on my own.”

You nod in agreement at that. “Yeah, me too.”

You’ve heard that the off-campus housing isn’t that great, and almost the same price as apartments in the city.

“Well, that works. Though, word of advice-” Jaehyun rests his hand on the table, meeting both of your eyes. “Get a roommate. Or two. Saves lots of money. Preferably one who doesn’t smoke copious amounts of weed, because it stinks up the entire house.”

He says it like he has personal experience, and you cough into your hand, nodding.

“Either of you got roommates yet?”

“No.” You and Mark say it in unison, looking at each other when you realise it and grinning slightly.

Jaehyun leans back, looking at the both of you with an unreadable look in his eyes. “Either of you stoners?”

You and Mark shake your head, and he whistles, impressed. “That’s rare. Well, just rent an apartment together, then.”

You glance at Mark, not quite sure what to say - you just met the man, after all.

“Um, we’ll think about it. Thanks for the suggestion,” he says, and Jaehyun nods. “No problem. here are your nametags, and you can head to the central square for the welcome activities.”

Your fingers close around the thin plastic folder, quickly thanking Jaehyun before you leave with Mark, the suggestion still lingering in your mind.

You do need a roommate. And Mark seems like a chill enough person, unless he’s secretly a serial killer.

“So…where are you planning to rent?”

“Probably somewhere near the city centre, but south. It’s nearer to the engineering faculty.”

When Mark says that, you feel a little bit more hopeful. “Me too. The education building’s just two subway stops down.”

“I wouldn’t mind, actually. You pay rent on time?”

“Yeah, I will. Dividing chores?”

“Of course. Also, just to make sure-” his mouth quirks up at the side. “You’re not a serial killer, right?”

“Fortunately not. I was thinking the same thing too.”

“Okay, great to know that we’re both not serial killers.” His comment lightens the mood a little, and you pause in your steps, outstretching your hand to Mark.

“Give me your phone. I’ll put my number in, and we can be friends first before deciding if we want to rent together next semester.”

He doesn’t protest, quickly slipping his phone out of his pocket and keying in his password.

And as you take it, you see his wallpaper - it’s a little white dog, staring up into the camera while someone’s sneakers are in frame - maybe his.

“Your wallpaper is cute. Is it your dog?” you ask, and Mark’s cheeks redden slightly as he shakes his head. “My friend’s. She’s called Daegal.”

“She’s really small. I wanted a dog when I was a kid,” you say off-handedly, quickly typing in your number and saving it with a ‘Y/N (potential future roomie)’ before giving his phone back to him. “Here.”

“You could get one next time.”

“Maybe. I can barely take care of myself now. I’m not sure if I can handle a dog.”

“I could ask my friend for advice, if you need it,” he says, smiling when he sees the contact name you saved. “Anyways, I’ll see you around, potential future roomie. We can get coffee next week or something.”

“Sounds good to me. By the way, Mark-”

He looks up at you, hands already tucked into his pockets.

“Who’s Hyuck?”

You only meet Hyuck, or otherwise known to everyone else as Lee Donghyuck, after you actually become roommates with Mark.

Somewhere along the way, the coffee outings had worked out, neither you or Mark finding each other’s presence unwanted, until it became natural to see Mark at least twice a week. Sometimes, it was midnight fries at McDonalds, and other times, it was lunches in the food hall, praying that the fresh pasta hadn’t yet run out.

And when the semester ended, you hadn’t hesitated to sign the lease that Mark handed you, for a perfectly-sized two-bedroom apartment overlooking one of the many crisscrossing side streets that made up the district.

It had the kitchenette you wanted, enough space in the living room for a four-person couch, and space for Mark to put his keyboard and guitar - which was the only thing he really wanted, honestly. The rest of the finishing touches had been suggested by you, like the IKEA oak coffee table and the extra cabinets for storage space.

The first month had been awkward and fraught with trivial disagreements, despite your relatively close friendship. Things like Mark not separating the blacks and whites during his laundry runs, or your terrible habit of leaving the bathroom light on at night. At some point, the both of you had even bickered over what plates to get, partially because you didn’t trust him with fragile items quite yet.

But his easygoing nature matched well with yours, and eventually the both of you settled into the rhythm of living together. He learnt that rule number one was to never go into your room without knocking or asking first, and you eventually stopped nagging at him to put a shirt on unless you were having friends over.

And sometime in August, you had come home, groceries in both of your hands, to find a complete stranger sitting on your couch, headphones placed squarely on his head.

You had screamed at him. and Donghyuck, naturally, had screamed back.

The both of you looked at each other, frozen, before Mark came rushing down the hallway, a confused expression on his face. “What- oh.”

“Mark, I thought you told her I was coming,” the man complains, his honey-brown hair falling over his eyes as he says it. Your gaze immediately shifts to your roommate, a very clear expression of what the hell? on your face.

“I think I forgot. Sorry. Um, Y/N, this is Hyuck.” Mark motions in the general periphery of the man on the couch, who smiles sweetly at you.

“Donghyuck to you. We’re not friends yet. Though we could be,” the boy adds thoughtfully, and you still haven’t quite recovered from the shock of the situation as you nod robotically. “Nice to meet you.”

Mark seems to notice the tension in the air, and immediately moves over to the kitchen counter. “I’ll help you unpack the groceries,” he offers, and you hand a few bags over to him.

Once Donghyuck’s out of earshot, however, you turn to Mark. “Is he staying for dinner? I don’t know if I bought enough ingredients.”

You and Mark had agreed to alternate cooking dinners each week, unless the other person had extenuating circumstances (like final exams). This week, it was your turn.

“It’s fine. If he doesn’t have enough, he can just make ramen,” Mark says, and you nod.

“Mark says you’re a really good cook.” The both of you jump at the sound of Donghyuck’s voice, not realising he came up behind at some point.

“That’s just because I can crack eggs, and Mark can’t.” You snort slightly at the expression on Mark’s face when you say that, his eyes widening in incredulity.

“You said I improved!”

“Having less eggshells to chew through in my omelette was an improvement,” you say, and his face falls comically. While he has made some improvements since learning to cook, you suppose eggs are the one thing that still intimidate him - Mark relies a lot more on oven-baked dinners and the air fryer to get the both of you through.

“You’re brave for eating what he makes,” Donghyuck comments.

“Very brave,” you say gravely, and he laughs. “I like her, Mark. She’s funny.”

“Thanks a lot, guys. Really feeling the love here,” your roommate grumbles, but Donghyuck ignores him, turning to you.

“Can we have kimchi-jjigae for dinner?” he asks, and you stiffen, because the ingredients you prepared are exactly for that dish. But you don’t quite want to give Donghyuck that satisfaction yet, only tilting your head up and narrowing your eyes at him.

“This isn’t a restaurant. You’ll eat what I give you.”

His eyes widen slightly, but it’s quickly replaced by mirth. “Noted, ma’am,” he retorts, and you decide that Donghyuck is the kind of person who’s annoying as all hell, but in the fun kind of way that makes you want to have him around and groan at his presence at the same time.

“Now, I need the both of you to move to the couch, because this kitchenette is way too small for three.” You make a shooing motion towards the two men, and thankfully, they listen obediently, Donghyuck returning back to his laptop.

After a while, you hear shuffling, and you turn to see Mark with his lips pursed, barely holding back a laugh. At the sight of his obvious amusement, you raise an eyebrow.

“Look at this video,” he says, turning the phone screen towards you, and you squint at the grainy resolution, before letting out a groan.

“Mark, this video is like, a decade old. No one watches Vines anymore,” you grumble, and your roommate stares at you incredulously. “But it’s still funny!”

“No, it’s not,” you say dryly, looking to Donghyuck for support, who’s watching the entire thing play out with amusement on his features. “Donghyuck, tell him the video isn’t funny.”

“That’s what I said. He sends me at least two a day,” the boy says from where he’s cross-legged on the couch, and Mark flashes you a look of utter, complete betrayal.

“Sorry, Mark,” you say lightly, patting him on the back in an act of comfort before he returns to the couch, dejected. It’s almost cute, and you hide your snort as you return back to your spot at the stove.

“What about this one?” You hear Mark ask Hyuck a few minutes later, who doesn’t hesitate to disagree and go on a tirade about how he doesn’t understand someone can be that unfunny and think it’s okay to put me through it by sending video after video.

The conversation only makes you smile as you settle into the familiar motion of prepping ingredients, something about it making you feel more at ease and more at home in the apartment that you’ve been in for only four months.

Corny sense of humor aside, you couldn’t ask for a better roommate. And you suppose Lee Donghyuck is okay too.

Eventually, the both of you do become friends, especially when Donghyuck realises the kimchi-jjigae you make is almost as good as his grandma’s, and while she’s a three-hour flight away, you and Mark live twenty minutes from his dorm.

Your freshman year passes that way, the beginning of so many things. Between the months spent studying and sitting at the counter eating ramen at midnight, Mark Lee becomes your best friend, until the both of you are almost inseparable.

And Donghyuck? Well, he comes and goes. Though you suppose you do have a modicum of affection for the overly dramatic theatre major.

There’s something thrilling about being in your final year, less than twelve months before you graduate.

You wonder if everything will be the same as it always is.

“Who the fuck is Draymond Green?”

“He’s a basketball player, you idiot.”

“You could have said Stephen Curry. I know who that is.”

“Is that the only one you know?”

“As a matter of fact, yes.” Donghyuck sets down his drink as he says it, eyes deliberately challenging Chenle to continue their pointless banter, one that the rest of you witness quietly, already used to the both of them.

“If the both of you are done, try finishing the food. We ordered too much,” Jisung says, and both Donghyuck and Chenle turn towards him in sync.

“Are you giving me instructions?” Donghyuck asks incredulously.

“I’m older than you, you know,” Chenle not-so-helpfully points out, and you look at the youngest boy sympathetically as his shoulders sink and his lips purse in an almost comical expression of frustration.

Except that it’s Jisung, and you’ve always had a soft spot for the introverted dance major, who’s like a little brother to you.

“Quit it, you two. He acts more mature than the both of you on most days.” At your words, Jisung smiles brightly at you, and you motion for him to eat a little more. “A dance major needs more food.”

“Theatre majors need food too!” Donghyuck whines dramatically, and you don’t hesitate to move the plate away from him, ignoring his protests that become even louder.

“You should eat too,” Mark encourages in a low murmur, picking up the tempura with his chopsticks and placing it on your plate. “You didn’t take much.”

You smile at him, shaking your head. “It’s okay. Yeji bought pizza for everyone today after our meeting, and Ms Lee let us finish the leftover muffins. I’m stuffed.”

“Still, you shouldn’t drink on an empty stomach,” he chides, moving the can of cider a little further from you, and you decide to relent to your best friend’s demand.

“Got it. You know, you should have just gone for a degree in Nutrition,” you tease, and the corner of Mark’s mouth quirks up as he meets your eyes. “I could. But Engineering’s…fun.”

“Don’t lie, Mark. I sat in on one of your lectures once.”

“That’s because it was the middle of the year! And data structures is one of the hardest topics in the syllabus.”

“Still, I think that was enough numbers to last me a lifetime.” You shiver at the memory of the screen, the different formulas displayed having been enough to give you a headache.

“I could teach you,” he offers, and you raise an eyebrow. “You think you’re better than Mr Kim?”

“Probably. Unless you see me as a balding sixty-five-year-old on the verge of sleep.”

“I mean, there is a slight resemblance- ow!”

Mark pinches your side at your comment, taking more food and dumping it in your bowl. “No more nonsense. Eat, or you’re never getting your drink back.”

“You’re so bossy,” you grumble, but you take a few bites anyway, and he looks pleased when he sees you finish a little bit more of the rice.

Until you see Jisung frantically taking out his phone in your peripheral vision, his screen lighting up with something that makes him let out a guttural groan. Donghyuck and Chenle pause their conversation temporarily, just to turn towards him.

“What’s wrong?” Chenle asks, and Jisung seems to hesitate, fingers drumming on the table as he meets your gazes one by one.

“I forgot I have filming at eight tomorrow. Fuck,” he says, ruffling his own hair in frustration.

“And your dorm’s so far away from here too…”

You look at Mark, trying to think of a solution.

“Jisung?” The boy opposite looks up at your mention of his name. “How about you stay at our place tonight?” you offer.

He seems to think about it, glancing towards Mark for approval as well. Your roommate only shrugs. “Sure. We’ll make space.”

All at once, Jisung’s features seem to light up, and he clasps his hands together, head bent down. “Thank you. You two are lifesavers.”

His earnest words make you laugh softly. “Should we head back then? It’s late.”

Mark nods, motioning for the bill, and you pack up your things.

Eventually, the five of you leave the restaurant and step out onto the smooth cobblestone of the street, with Jisung, Donghyuck and Chenle in front while you and Mark trail behind.

“i can’t believe it’s already November,” Mark comments, gaze tilted upwards to the sky.

“Honestly, I don’t think I’ve even registered that we’re in our final year. Much less that the first semester is ending.”

“But you’ve got everything all planned out already, haven't you?”

“Sort of,” you reply sheepishly, and Mark laughs, shaking his head. “You’re way too ambitious. It’s a little scary.”

“Pretty sure I remember someone saying that ambition led to success in my high school Civics class. Either way, I want to retire by the time I’m forty.”

“Before that, could you use your income to buy us a bigger apartment?”

“What, you think we’ll be roommates with each other until I’m forty?”

“I don’t see why not,” Mark says earnestly, and it makes the space he takes up in your heart get a little bigger, curling warmly at the edges.

“I’ll think about it. Maybe I’ll move to an island in the middle of nowhere, away from civilization.”

‘As if. You’re a city girl,” he points out, and you know that Mark knows that you know he’s right. “So, roommates at forty?” he asks, and your lips tilt up involuntarily.

“Sure.”

It’s not long before you’re standing at the entrance of your apartment building, Donghyuck and Chenle waving goodbye before they head to the subway station. Meanwhile, Jisung follows behind the both of you, slightly reminiscent of a lost puppy.

Once you’re back home, you quickly hang your jacket in the cabinet. “I’m showering first, okay?”

The two boys make a noise of assent at your question, and you assume Mark’s going to lend Jisung his clothes to change into as they go down the hallway.

It’s only when you step out of the bathroom that you hear the soft background sound effects of some video game from Mark’s room, Jisung occasionally exclaiming something inaudible, and you smile slightly. Your best friend isn’t one for these sorts of things, but it’s quite a big hobby for the rest of them. There have been a few times where you’ve shuffled out of your bedroom at midnight to tell them to quiet down, usually receiving a few quickly muttered apologies before Donghyuck’s screaming at Mark to get his head in the game.

You hope that they won’t stay up too late, mainly for Jisung’s sake - he has a shoot, after all, and you’re pretty sure Mark doesn’t have any morning lessons on Saturdays.

Sleep finds you quickly, the alcohol from earlier making you just the right amount of drowsy as you attempt to set an alarm for tomorrow for breakfast.

“Y/N.”

“Hey, wake up.”

“Y/N.”

You let out a groan into your pillow, turning away from the dream voice that sounds suspiciously like Mark - you’re too tired to deal with this.

But the voice doesn’t go away, instead changing to an insisted hand on your shoulder, shaking you awake, and you open your eyes to glare sleepily at your best friend, before looking at the clock.

“It’s four in the morning, Mark. Unless there’s a fire or something-”

“If there was a fire, I’d sound a lot more panicked than this, don’t you think?” he shoots back sarcastically, and you take in his appearance - he’s wearing a grey hoodie, a pillow hugged in his left arm, and looking just a little forlorn.

“What is it? I want to sleep,” you mumble.

“Jisung takes up too much space. And he snores.”

“Just push him.”

“I tried! Fell off the bed,” he confesses, and you would laugh at the scene, except that you’re still half-asleep.

“Can I just sleep here for tonight?” he asks, doe eyes blinking at you blearily, and you hesitate at the request - it’s not like you’re uncomfortable with Mark sleeping next to you. You’ve fallen asleep on his shoulder plenty of times, and there was that one time where you literally passed out drunk and the boy had to piggyback you to your apartment, but this is your bed.

However, you’re also well aware that Mark’s bed is a twin size, which is smaller and probably highly uncomfortable for him and Jisung to share, while yours is a queen.

You were being overdramatic. It was just a bed, and Mark was your best friend. Of three years, no less.

Also, it literally didn’t have to mean anything.

Right?

There was plenty of space. Enough for you to keep your distance from him.

You chalk up your doubts to late-night overthinking, and nod slowly. Well, as best as someone can nod while lying on their side, but it’s enough for Mark to smile at you gratefully.

“Take the left side. If you move over, I’ll kick you,” you threaten, and he nods eagerly. “Noted.”

And just for security, you place a pillow between the both of you.

It’s only when he’s lying down next to you, breathing evened out, that you peek open one eye. “Go to sleep.”

“Yeah, I will soon,” he promises, turning to face you. In the darkness of the room, you can barely make out his features, but you can hear the smile in his voice when he speaks. “Goodnight, Y/N.”

Something about it feels strangely sweet, enough for your cheeks to redden slightly as you turn resolutely away from him, staring hard at the wall of your cabinet. “Night.”

Two months into your lease with Mark, the both of you had created your informal agreement, otherwise labelled as ‘Roommate Code of Honour’ on Mark’s Notes app.

“Code of honour? What are you, a boy scout?”

“I was, actually. First-class,” Mark says without hesitation, and you almost choke on the mouthful of chocolate cake that you have.

“Makes sense.” He seemed exactly like the kind of person who would be a boy scout.

“Anyways, this is just for us to put down stuff that we think is important. Like, I know that we’re supposed to separate the blacks and whites, but-”

“But-”

“What about coloured clothing?” he asks, and you gape at him. “Mark, have you been washing all the coloured clothes together?”

“Maybe…” he trails off, gaze leaving yours and anxiously taking a sip of the drink.

“Okay, this is a good idea. Give me your phone,” you say as you stretch out your hand, but Mark pulls his phone back from you.

“This is meant to be a collaborative process, Y/N.”

“It wasn’t collaborative the moment you turned all my white shirts grey.”

Mark winces at that. “Fair point. But we still need to be equal on this.”

“Fine,” you relent.

And over an hour, seated on the second floor of your favourite cafe, you and Mark pick the ten most important things that you want to keep, the others either compromised or decided as simply too insignificant.

#1: money (mark covers utilities, y/n handles groceries and household items)

#2: always put the toilet seat back down (and clean your hair off the sink after shaving)

“You leave hair all over the place too!” Mark protests, and you roll your eyes.

#2: always put the toilet seat back down (and clean your hair off everywhere)

#3: laundry and cleaning the house will be alternated each week

#4: two days’ advance notice before having anyone over (not required for hyuck, yeji, jaemin or karina)

“Does this include hookups?” you ask, and Mark blushes at that question. “Yeah, I guess.”

“No hookups on nights where the other person has to wake up early the next day,” you add, and he nods. “Sure.”

Most of them are trivial, but important - and despite all your teasing, you’re grateful for someone like Mark, who’s willing to be a good roommate.

Until you reach the last one, which makes you smile.

#10: movie nights are every friday at 10pm

Mark had argued something about ‘roommate bonding’, or the importance of relationship-building- you weren’t quite sure what exactly, but the idea had sounded good to you.

Because you’d never been one for university parties, preferring to stay in unless your presence was absolutely required, but the idea of unwinding with your close friend at the end of the week was a welcome form of socialization.

“Do we pick the movie every week?” you ask, and he nods. “We can make a list too.”

“Okay.” You slide the phone back over to him, finishing the last of your coffee. “I think this looks good.”

“Me too,” Mark says, satisfaction tugging at his lips, and his eyes are bright as he looks at you.

The atmosphere feels strangely light and hopeful - as if it’s just the very start of something.

And you’re right - because throughout sophomore and junior year, Mark becomes the one most constant thing in your life. The both of you have changed slightly in your own ways, but the movie nights are still the one thing you look forward to at the end of the week, where your legs are thrown over his lap and whatever takeout you’ve gotten for dinner spread out over the coffee table.

Today is another one of those days, and you wonder how both you and Mark haven’t run out of movies to watch yet - he said something about Avatar today, you think, having sent you a text earlier of the poster.

When you kick off your shoes in the doorway, Mark’s already on the couch, absentmindedly nibbling at the popcorn.

“Starting without me?” you ask, and he shakes his head, handing you your own bowl.

It was another thing that the both of you had agreed on - after all, you liked your popcorn sweet and caramel-flavoured, and while you couldn’t understand how someone liked salty popcorn, well - there was Mark.

Which meant two separate bowls chock-full of the snack, enough to make the both of you happy.

“Mark,” you start, and the man hums in acknowledgement. “You know we have a Disney Plus subscription, right? And Netflix too?”

“Yeah, but the movie just came out like, five days ago. This is pirated.”

“We can just wait for it to be uploaded, then.”

“But I really want to watch it,” he half-pleads and half-whines. “Besides, Hyuck went, and he’ll definitely spoil it.”

You suppose he’s right, but as you lean back, crossing your legs on the couch, you frown. “We’re going to get porn pop-ups every thirty minutes.”

He coughs awkwardly at that, making you grin slightly. It’s strange how shy he gets, considering you’d expect Mark to at least have some experience with girls - or at least not act like the topic of sex is enough to make him embarrassed.

However, he’s still fiddling with the laptop, crouched next to the console, when you poke his side with your foot.

You have a crazy idea. A good one, but crazy nonetheless.

“What if we went to the cinema right now?” you ask, and he blinks at you, stunned.

“Right now? It’s like, one hour to midnight.”

“Yeah. I’m pretty sure they have showings.” You whip out your phone for emphasis, quickly going to the website and letting out a hum of satisfaction when you find it.

“Thirty minutes. We can make it.”

Mark looks at you hesitantly - always having been the less spontaneous one of the both of you. But it’s a Friday, after all, and it’s good, harmless fun.

And you know he really wants to watch the movie, if the way he’s on freemovies123.com and patiently waiting for each risqué ad to disappear is any indication.

“I’ll pay for tickets,” you offer, smiling knowingly when he lights up a little - it’s characteristic of any college student to perk up at the mention of anything free, after all, and you know he’s slowly shifting to a ‘yes’.

It’s barely a few seconds before he shuts his laptop, meeting your gaze. “We should get changed. It’s cold out today.”

There’s one good thing about having a roommate with a driving license - that it’s not you.

Because while Mark worries about traffic lights and less-than-friendly taxi drivers, you’re staring out the window absentmindedly, enjoying Bruno Major filtering out the speakers.

It had been one thing he wanted - a good sound system, just so the both of you could enjoy your playlists on the road.

Thankfully, the timing means that there’s barely anyone else around as Mark goes down the highway, humming softly to the music.

“I like late-night drives with you,” you chirp, gaze fixed on Mark’s expression as he smiles, face fading in and out of the golden light of the street lamps.

“Any particular reason?”

“You’re a good driver,” you start, and he turns towards you briefly, narrowing his eyes. “You make me sound like an Uber hire.”

“Um-” you lick your lips. “You have good music?” you try, and your best friend lets out a laugh that sounds more like a scoff, shaking his head. “You’re hopeless,” he says, and you immediately lean closer, shaking your head.

“It’s not just that! When you drive, I-” you hesitate, trying to find the exact words. “I feel really safe. I don’t really feel that way with anyone else on the road.”

Mark doesn’t respond for a few moments, but from the way his hands tighten on the wheel, you know he heard every word clearly.

After a while, he finally speaks.

“Is that why you get me to drive you everywhere?” he asks, and you nod slowly, until you see the corners of his mouth turned up in amusement, earning him a punch on the shoulder from you.

“Don’t laugh. I’m serious. Car accidents can do a lot to a person, you know.”

It’s only then that Mark straightens. “Car accident?”

“Yeah,” you hum, fiddling with the volume of the music to turn it down. “Got into one when I was a kid.”

“How bad?”

“Not that bad. I was in the backseat, so there were only a few scrapes. The other car got it worse, honestly.”

You’ve never told anyone else about this, simply because it’s never quite come up. But when you spend so much time with someone like Mark, small snippets of your life come up eventually - like how you know he sprained his ankle once playing soccer, or that he failed art in elementary school but got perfect grades for music.

And when the feeling of his hand settles warmly over yours, you’re yanked out of your thoughts, blankly staring at his fingers winding themselves between your thumb and your index.

It causes heat to flood through you, even though you’re aware the action is meant to be soothing.

When you hear his next words, however, it’s enough to make your heart soften to a dangerous degree - of such unspeakable fondness that only Mark has been able to elicit to some extent.

“I’ll drive you everywhere from now on, okay? Promise,” he smiles softly as he says it, tugging your pinky towards his own before you can even respond to seal the agreement.

Even when he was a kid, Mark took easily to leadership.

He remembers standing on the podium on his first day on the job as student president, socks cuffed at the perfect length past his ankles, as he delivered his first stuttered-out address to hundreds of middle-schoolers no older than him.

It got easier after that, as he fell into the role more comfortably.

After that, it was chairperson of his high-school music club, helping to compose different pieces for the summer and winter festivals.

Now, in university, he supposes there aren’t really things like student council presidents anymore - everyone is interested in their own lives, and Mark’s not entirely sure he enjoys the entire process of putting himself out there to be judged.

It’s always been the people who made him want to do what he did, and Mark supposes that now his attention is turned to his friends. Reigning in Donghyuck’s more mischievous and unrestrained impulses, preventing Jisung from making the same naive decisions he did at twenty, or getting Jaemin to leave the house to meet his friends and not give in to his natural tendency of isolation - it’s something that he does gladly. Mark would like to think that he knows his friends well, and being the oldest makes him the best-suited to take on the responsibility.

Still, there are times when he likes letting go, not thinking and worrying so hard - most of the time it’s being alone with just his guitar. In those few hours, his brain seems to go perfectly quiet.

Other times, it’s you pulling him into a cinema at midnight, two movie tickets and a brand-new box of popcorn hugged in your arm.

When you halt your footsteps, Mark doesn’t even realise until you’re standing in front of him. If he just angled his face down slightly, the tips of your noses would brush.

“Didn’t you say you really wanted to watch this?” you ask, lashes fluttering, and Mark nods. “Yeah.”

“Then why do you look so sad?” You’re frowning at him, and he has the temptation to smooth out the line in your forehead with his thumb.

“I’m really happy, actually,” he murmurs, and he means it. There’s something about this entire thing that makes him feel more peaceful than he has in a long time. “I was just thinking.”

Thinking about you, to say the least. He didn’t know he could be so comfortable with a person, that spending time felt as easy as breathing.

Thankfully, you don’t question his cryptic words further, only tightening your hold on the tickets. “Let’s walk quicker then. You always complain when we miss the beginning of movies.”

You say it with the easy familiarity of someone who knows him well, and Mark laughs softly. “That’s because you always take too long to get ready.”

“I don’t!”

“You once spent one hour trying to curl your hair, and then decided to leave it straight.”

“That was for your cousin’s wedding. My hair needed to look decent. Besides, I’m the only plus one you have. Who would you ask? Hyuck?”

“Maybe. I’m sure he’d look good in a wig.”

“But your family loves me,” you say smugly, and Mark can’t give a response against that, because you’re right. You’re practically adored by everyone, from his grandparents to even his youngest niece.

“Don’t let it go to your head,” he murmurs, but you only grin. “Can’t help it.”

Eventually, you finally reach the doors of the cinema hall, and Mark pushes the door open, a cold gust of air-conditioning hitting the both of you directly as you make your way down to the seats.

When you shiver, he looks at you disapprovingly. “I thought I told you to wear something warm.”

“A long-sleeved shirt is warm,” you protest, and he huffs, but shrugs off his denim jacket anyways.

“Take it. If you get a flu, I have to take care of you.”

“Thank you,” you say sweetly, quickly wearing it on. “Besides, you owe me one for that time you got stomach flu.”

Mark shivers at the very mention of it. Almost six months ago, and yet he still remembers barely being able to get out of bed. That week, you had come home immediately each time your lectures ended, searching up different websites for recipes that wouldn't upset his stomach. Porridge, soups, stews - Mark was pretty sure you had cycled through hundreds of different ingredients, and blew a complete hole in your allowance deliberately only buying organic, but you resolutely refused to tell him about it until he found you eating instant ramen the next month.

It was equal parts frustrating and endearing - the way you wouldn’t tell anyone about your problems, until you were pestered endlessly. Not so different from him, he supposed, though you took it to an even greater degree.

“Mark, I can hear you thinking. Stop and watch the movie,” you chide, grabbing his upturned palm and placing a handful of popcorn on it.

He turns to see you, profile lit against the bright lights of the screen, as you laugh at some advertisement being shown, eyes bright despite the late hour, and Mark thinks this might become one of his favourite memories with you.

And it does, even when you fall asleep in the car four hours later and he has to carry you up, your arms slung around his neck.

Mark Lee is showering when he hears a scream.

It’s shrill enough to make him turn off the water, the steam clearing until he sees his own reflection in the glass.

“Y/N? You good?” He asks it loud enough for you to hear, but there isn’t a response.

You’re not a jumpy person, and while you would probably be alright if he just continued his shower, a what if of worry has Mark wrapping a towel around his waist and opening the door.

However, you’re nowhere to be seen in the hallway, and Mark moves to the living room, seeing you backfacing him, a spoon still in your hands and your posture unnaturally defensive.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, and you turn, an expression of abject horror etched on your features.

“There’s a cockroach somewhere. I saw it on the floor, and it’s gone now,” you say in a rush, and Mark laughs.

“Don’t laugh! This is serious,” you say to him, and your roommate only shakes his head. He’s aware of your fear of bugs, though, which is why he takes the spoon from your hands and steers you towards the hallway.

“If you’re that scared, go to your room. I’ll catch it later.”

You nod in agreement. “You still have shampoo in your hair, by the way,” you point out, and he rolls his eyes.

“Yeah, because someone screamed so loud that I thought there was a murderer in our apartment.”

“I think I would have a better chance of surviving anyways,” you bite back, and Mark glances doubtfully at the spoon in your hand, and then back at you.

“Sure, Y/N.”

You wave him off. “Enjoy your shower.”

However, right as Mark places his hand on the door handle, there’s another shriek. He spots the cockroach first, scuttling across the floor, before he sees you barrelling towards him.

“Oh my god!” you shout as you run towards Mark, and his arms reflexively open as you hug him tightly in fear - not entirely registering the fact that he is still very much half-naked.

You’re gripping onto him tightly, face buried into the crook of his neck, and it’s a few seconds before Mark realizes the proximity of your position, every inch of your body warm against his bare skin.

It’s enough to make the tips of his ears flush scarlet, and Mark can’t hear anything other than the aggressive beating of his heart.

“Um, Y/N-” he makes an attempt to start, patting you on the shoulder gently. “Let me go.”

You seem to realise it at the same time he does, quickly stepping back, eyes wide. “Shit, sorry.”

Mark lets out a laugh, even though it comes out choked. “It’s okay. Just- I’ll shower and come right back out, okay?”

“Yeah. That’s a good idea,” you stutter out, all thoughts of the insect forgotten as you backtrack hastily into your room, quickly shutting the door behind you.

Mark stares blankly at the oak wood of your bedroom door, before blinking to clear his head. “Jesus,” he mutters, wondering what the hell just happened.

His body feels warm all over, almost like he’s having a fever, and it’s like he can still feel the sensation of your palms flat against his lower back, your breath tickling the space between his neck and shoulder.

And when he sees his reflection in the mirror, there are two spots of bright red on his cheeks.

Everything returns to normal after that.

Well, almost.

Other than the fact that Mark can’t seem to stop thinking about you.

It’s bad enough that as his roommate and best friend, you already take up a decently large space of his brain - whether it’s worrying about when you’ll get home once it’s past midnight, or messaging you to ask if you want takeout.

But something about this is a hundred times worse.

Because just the sight of you is enough to have blood rushing to his face, his head darting down to avoid your gaze.

And Mark feels stupid. For God’s sake, he’s not some teenage boy - he’s already twenty-three, and yet he’s acting like a twelve-year-old who just held hands with a girl for the first time.

He’s shared a bed with you. He’s watched you cry after you failed your first exam, tears and snot balled up into countless tissues and filling up the little trashbin in your room. At some point, he had helped to clean up your vomit when you got a bad case of food poisoning.

To be fair, that was because the pancakes he made for breakfast were only half-cooked, so it was sort of his responsibility.

But the fact remains that Mark’s done hundreds of things with you, and spent countless hours by your side - all of which have allowed him to function normally without feeling like his heart is about to combust.

But now, he can’t even sit next to you without his words turning into stuttering chunks of speech.

It doesn’t help that you’re also naturally affectionate, a habit that you picked up from Donghyuck, of all people, and each time you slide your arm into his or wrap a hand around his waist is enough to have his brain short-circuit.

Deep down, Mark has an inkling why he’s like this.

He just really hopes it isn’t true.

It’s not something he’s told anyone, not Chenle, not Renjun, not even Hyuck, who practically knows all of Mark’s deepest, darkest secrets.

That for a minuscule, short duration of three months, Mark had a crush on you. The pretty girl who he collided directly into on the very first day.

There were times when he wondered if the coffee trips could be labelled dates, or if it was a figment of his hyperactive imagination and racing heart. And as the both of you got closer, Mark always teetered between the temptation of trying to ask you out and the fear that he still didn’t know you that well.

Until the both of you got too close as friends, and it was more comfortable to simply stay within the boundaries of friendship. And eventually, Mark put it behind him, seeing those three initial months as nothing more but a simple infatuation that preceded his friendship with you.

And it wasn’t like you had expressed a lot of interest in him either, occasionally complaining to Mark about dates you went on or the newest eye candy that you had seen on campus.

So he let it go, and Mark thought he could be perfectly happy like this.

Until last week, when he was returned to freshman year.

Since then, Mark has been avoiding you with the excuse of coursework, partly for the own good of his heart and also because he doesn’t want to throw you off with his sudden, odd behaviour.

But you know him a little too well, which means that when Friday comes, you’re banging on his bedroom door.

“Mark Lee, I know you’re done with your coursework. Let me in,” you demand, and the man gulps nervously, wishing that he’d bought those noise-cancelling headphones so he could at least use them as an excuse.

He sidles towards the door reluctantly, feet dragging even as little pinpricks of excitement jab at his heart - a sensation he’s quickly come to associate with you.

“Hey. Um, you need anything?” he asks, voice tight with nervousness.

“I need to know why my best friend’s avoiding me like the plague,” you say without hesitating, slipping in through the small space between his body and the door before he can kick you out.

“i’m not avoiding you. I’m just really busy,” Mark lies. “Like, with school and stuff.”

God, it sounds bad even to his ears.

“I hope you know I didn’t believe that for a second,” you say, walking to his desk and looking directly at his completely-shut laptop.

“I-” Mark’s throat feels dry as you abruptly turn towards him, cutting across the room and facing him directly, hands squared on your hips as you tilt your head.

“Did you commit a crime? I know how to hide a body, you know.”

“…No?”

“Forgot to pay rent? Left the stove on? Or-”

“It’s none of that!” He says, hands instinctively reaching for your shoulders to halt you from listing any other potential transgressions he might have made.

And when you meet his eyes again, you look properly frustrated, before you seem to sink slightly, voice turning a little softer.

“Did I do something…wrong? You can tell me, you know.” You blink up at him slowly, and Mark’s heart feels bittersweet as he sees the slight worry in your gaze.

“No. Of course not.” Guilt rises in his stomach - of course his standoffish behaviour would make you think the worst. ‘’It’s none of that.”

Mark wishes that he could kick his feelings to the side and shove them far down, if only to make the doubt in your features go away. Considering that it’s you he has these feelings for, however, makes the task seem near impossible, but Mark thinks it doesn’t hurt to try.

So he smiles, bright enough to make you relax a little. “It’s really just school. I realised I actually need to do well to graduate, and I didn’t want my stress to get to you.”

At his words, your eyes glaze over with a familiar, warm empathy, and Mark tries not to let his relief become too palpable. “I get it. But, Mark-”

“Hm?”

“You can come to me for these sorts of things, you know? When you’re stressed. I want to be that person for you.”

What you’re saying is simple- expected, even, considering the nature of your relationship with him, but it still knocks the breath out of Mark.

He’s loved by you. That much is clear, even if it’s not exactly in the way he so desperately wishes to be loved by you. But even this is enough.

“Okay. Yeah, I will,” he promises, realising that he doesn’t hate the bittersweet feeling in his heart that is already so closely associated with you - not when it’s constantly soothed by the quiet happiness of having you by his side.

“See, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” You loop your arm in his, pulling him out of the room. “Since that’s resolved, no more hiding in your room.”

“But-”

“No buts. We study here from now on. you’re not the only one with exams, you know,” you say as you bring your books and laptop out, scattering them across the dining table.

Mark can tell when you’ve set your mind on something, and so he doesn’t resist, placing his own things opposite you and welcoming it when you smile in approval.

For a while, he sits there blankly - he wasn’t even studying in the first place, after all, and he’s already well-prepared for his technical exam next week, but he’s pulled out of his thoughts when you call his name expectantly.

You’ve already made yourself comfortable by the window, your headphones resting snugly around your ears as you tilt your head at him, eyes bright.

You look pretty, as always.

But Mark’s almost-adoring gaze is left unnoticed by you as you frown at him. Study, you mouth, picking up your textbook and pointing to it for emphasis in a way that makes a laugh bubble out his chest.

It’s cute. You’re cute.

If he doesn’t do as you say, however, Mark’s cover will genuinely be busted, and so the man genuinely tries to immerse himself in revision for his readings as best as he can.

And if he occasionally sneaks glances just to admire you in the golden glow of dusk that spills through the window - well, it didn’t happen if you didn’t catch him, did it?

You’re standing in the kitchen when you hear Mark’s bedroom door open, and a soft yawn from the hallway.

“Morning. I made toast, and Chenle gave us a new bottle of jam the other day,” you say, pushing a plate across the counter.

“Thanks,” he says, voice still rough from sleep and eyes only half-open as he munches absentmindedly at the first piece of bread he picks up.

He’s always the sleepiest on Thursday mornings, mainly because the lectures are first thing in the morning and on the furthest side of the campus. And considering how much of a night owl Mark is, waking up anytime before ten is practically punishment for him.

Meanwhile, you’re perfectly chirpy, already having gotten your first coffee of the day down and your usual omelette slowly cooking away in the pan.

“You know, Donghyuck suggested doing a trip during winter break,” you say, and Mark hums in agreement, thinking it over. “To where?”

“Out of the city. Maybe to the beach. I think it would be fun.”

“Are you going to plan it, then?” he asks, and you nod excitedly. You’ve always had a penchant for travelling, and maybe it’s because of your course in early education - you’re already used to organizing different programmes.

“I was thinking we would do a barbecue, and then maybe just some games and karaoke. Though I’m sure some of the guys want to go biking, and I think Yeji mentioned doing a pottery class or checking out local markets.” You ramble out all your ideas in a rush, but Mark only nods at your every word.

“I’m sure we can figure something out.”

“We just need to find a house big enough for all twelve of us- ouch!” Your sentence is cut off by a sharp exclamation of pain as you pull your hand back, an unsightly red patch already forming on the area between your index and thumb.

You hadn’t even realised you had gotten that close to the stove when you turned around to speak to Mark. It’s not your first time getting burned - you had accidentally brushed your arm against the top of your oven when you were sixteen, but the pain is enough to make you wince in alarm.

Still, it’s tolerable as you rush to the sink and turn on the cold water, Mark materializing by your side within seconds.

“You okay?” he asks, now fully-awake as he grabs your wrist, turning it over gently to inspect the injury.

“Yeah.” You shake your head. “Small mistake. I’ll manage it.”

You turn off the tap, planning to get some ice, but Mark’s faster than you. “Take this. I’ll get the antiseptic cream.”

“I can handle it. You should get ready for class,” you urge, but he shakes his head, already disappearing down the hallway.

When he reappears, the small white tube is in his hands, and Mark motions for you to place your hand in his. “This might hurt a little,” he murmurs, blinking up at you through his lashes, and you nod.

“Wouldn’t have thought.”

You don’t get to make another wisecrack, however, the moment his thumb brushes over the wound. Mark’s gentle, dabbing at it as softly as possible, but your breathing still tightens.

Eventually, the sting gets a little more bearable, and you watch as the reddish patch fades to a less angry tone. “Done,” Mark says, quickly smoothing a plaster over it. “Don’t let it get near water, and don’t let it get dirty.”

“Got it, dad.” He rolls his eyes at that and you nudge his shoulder. “You really should go for class now.”

“Are you sure you’ll be alright?” he asks, eyes wide, and the concern that’s evident in Mark’s eyes makes your heart flutter warmly. “It’s just a burn, Mark. The next time I break my leg, I’ll make you carry me around for a month.”

He frowns. “Don’t say that. I don’t want you to break a leg.”

“I’ll be careful, I promise. Look, if you’re that worried-” you stretch your hand out to him, palm facing the ceiling as you grin. “-you can kiss it better.”

The request is a teasing one, one that you expect to turn Mark the colour of a tomato - after all, he’s made shy easily, and always embarrassed at things like this.

Yet, what you don’t expect is the immediate feeling of the boy’s lips against your skin, no hesitation on his part as he places the gentlest of kisses at the corner between your thumb and your index.

You freeze. There’s no way Mark just did that.

There’s no way the same person who would shove you away when you attempted to place a kiss on his cheek, nervously sputtering, or the one who jerked away the first time you tried to hug him, is now smiling up at you in a way that could be seen as almost cocky, eyes blinking innocently up at you.

“Better?” he asks lowly, placing another kiss for emphasis in a way that makes your heart go haywire.

Your throat feels dry when you make an attempt to reply to him. “Yeah. All better,” you force out, quickly retracting your hand and shoving it into the pocket of your sweatpants. Far away from boys who think it’s a good idea to kiss it and make your mind go blank.

“Well, I’m going, then,” he says, now finally having the familiar lopsided grin that you’re used to - despite that, however, your heart lurches with fondness as you watch him grab his bag and hoodie before waving at you.

“Bye,” you exhale out, hands unconsciously finding the cool marble of the countertop in a quest for stability, until the door finally shuts.

You’re faced with an empty hallway, finally, as you attempt to process the events of the past fifteen minutes, the pain of the burn now an afterthought.

What the fuck just happened?

Mark thinks he might be going insane.

Completely, veritably insane.

Kissing your hand was an impulse decision - mainly because he wanted to get back at you for making those flirtatious remarks all the damn time without any idea of how they messed with his head.

But part of it was also because you had asked so sweetly, and Mark found himself quite incapable of refusing you. And the two spots of pink that had dusted your cheeks after were worth it.

However, it seems that he’s suffering much more than you are - what with the events of the past week. It’s as if he can’t help but notice the smallest, most insignificant things about you, that are enough to make him fall a little deeper, a little further down to where it’s harder to get out.

Like how you hum to yourself when you water the plants on the windowsill, and it’s always that one song - the one that your dad played for you as a kid, and which you added into Mark’s playlist without him knowing. Or how Mark always leaves his guitar all over the house, but you make sure to return it to its usual spot next to his bed.

Even worse, you’re always leaning your head on his shoulder, or reaching out to fiddle with the strings of his hoodie. It feels good being close to you - Mark loves it, in fact, but it also makes him terribly nervous in a way that makes him stiffen awkwardly whenever you brush a little too close to him.

Now, however, Mark realises he might be the one on the losing end as he sits in his Structural Analysis lecture and wonders what it would be like to actually kiss you.

His pen is spinning in his hands - he hasn’t written down a single thing in the past thirty minutes, and Mr Lee’s already sending him suspicious glances from across the room, but Mark has mostly been a model student for the past two years, which is why he supposes his lecturer bites his tongue.

Still, he can’t keep going like this. Not when he feels like his heart is constantly about to burst out of his chest, and he has to physically stop himself from spinning you by the waist and planting his lips firmly on yours.

Of course, he’d never do that unless you gave any indication that you wanted it, but it’s hard. It’s hard to have you so close and yet completely out of Mark’s reach.

As a child, he would stand at the seashore, feet half-buried in the sand as he looked out to the glittering blue expanse of sea, and the horizon that lay beyond. There was always something about the warm orange hues and pink streaks that took his breath away, so beautiful that he wanted to swim towards it endlessly.

You’re his horizon now, a thousand gorgeous sunsets contained in a single person and enough to make Mark feel like he’s living and dying all at once.

The next week, you’re sitting on the couch scrolling on your phone when Mark’s footsteps alert you to his presence.

Right as you lift your head to see him, however, you frown. “Why are you dressed like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like…you’re going to work out. Or something,” you reply, giving him a once-over. Joggers, a dry-fit shirt and track shoes, complete with a water bottle in his hands - something’s definitely up.

“That’s because I am,” he answers, an amused tilt of his lips evident as he takes in the surprise on your face.

“No way. I tried getting you to do that fitness program in freshman year, and you said you’d rather die than exercise.”

“That was because I can’t do yoga for shit. I’m going to the gym with Jeno today.”

At the mention of the other boy, you nod, slowly processing the information. It makes sense that Jeno would drag him to the gym, considering the boy has long made a habit of it with Jaemin. But still, the fact that Mark agreed makes you narrow your eyes.

“Why the sudden interest, though?” you ask, turning over to rest your head on the couch and stretch out your legs.

Mark only shrugs, slinging his towel over his shoulder. “Finally found the time. Besides, seniors get free access. If you didn’t notice, I’ve been going with Jeno since the start of the year.”

It’s currently June, which means six months. Though it’s likely that you probably couldn’t make the distinction between when he was going to the gym or lessons, because Mark perpetually lived in sweatpants and a hoodie.

“Fair enough. Have fun,” you call, tugging a pillow to hug to your body as you find a new social media site to scroll through.

However, you find your eyes drifting to Mark as he fills his bottle at the sink, carefully scrutinising your best friend for any evident changes.

You suppose his shoulders have broadened considerably since freshman year, jawline a little more defined than the round-cheeked boy you first met. Nothing out of the ordinary - plenty of the same changes had happened to the other boys, and it wasn’t as if you hadn’t made changes to your own appearance over the many years.

However, Mark’s usually dressed in the baggiest of sweaters and hoodies, only changing into a fitted shirt today due to the warm summer weather, and your cheeks redden when you find your eyes drifting to the way the muscles in his back stretch when he reaches for something on the upper shelf, a faint line appearing on his forearms as he unscrews the cap and adds his vitamins inside.

He looks good. Better than he should. You don’t even realize you’re shamelessly ogling your best friend until he looks up at you, eyes directly meeting yours in a way that makes you jump.

“Everything okay?” he asks, and you nod slowly, forcing your eyes away from anything but the way his collarbones peek out from beneath his shirt.

This is Mark. Your roommate, who you most definitely shouldn’t stare at in a borderline-creepy way. no matter how attractive he may seem.

Thankfully, you regain your senses quickly enough, darting your head back down until it’s half-veiled by the pillow. “Get a grip, Y/N,” you mutter to yourself.

“Well, I’m gonna go,” Mark calls, and you physically stop yourself from looking up, instead choosing to extend your arm upwards to wave.

“Bye! Go!” you say with no little urgency, sensing Mark’s palpable confusion from your bizarre confusion a few metres away.

Nevertheless, he grabs his things, the door eventually closing shut.

It’s halfway through his last set that Jeno appears above Mark, a bottle of ice-cold water in his hands.

“Thanks,” he says as he sits up from the bench press, quickly taking a large gulp. “What are you doing after this?”

“Giselle asked me to grab dinner with her.”

At his words, Mark grins, nudging Jeno’s knee. “Do the both of you have something going on?”

Jeno only huffs, brushing a strand of hair out of his face. “We’re just friends. Don’t overthink it. You and Y/N, on the other hand…”

The mention of your name is enough to make Mark cough awkwardly, gaze darting away. And while Jeno doesn’t say anything, it’s Jaemin who’s perceptive as ever, a teasing smile on his face as he meets Mark’s nervous gaze.

“Out with it. What’s up with the both of you?” he asks curiously.

“Um,” Mark coughs, swiping off the beads of sweat that seem to have mysteriously materialized at his temples. “Nothing.”

It’s as honest of a reply that he can give, because there really isn’t much for Mark to say. While Mark freaks out inside each time you say something, life seems to be going on normally for you.

Jeno hums. “Doesn’t seem like nothing.”

Frustration bubbles up in Mark at those words, though it’s not directed at Jaemin or Jeno, but instead at himself.

“I mean, I like her-”

“I knew it,” Jaemin declares, crossing his arms over his chest. “Took you long enough.”

Mark leans back, chuckling softly. “Just realised it myself a few days ago, honestly.”

It wasn’t as if Mark hadn’t had a crush on anyone before - rather, it was that being with you felt slightly different from the rest. The butterflies aside, there was something else that tugged at the pit of his stomach each time he thought about you. It was akin to the split-second adrenaline he felt on top of rollercoasters, just before it came tumbling straight down.

And he wasn’t sure what to make of that. Mark thought a better word to describe his affection for you was yearning, rather than just a simple like. Like didn’t seem to quite explain how being in your presence never quite tired him out, how you were the one person that Mark didn’t need a social battery for. He was simply so used to you at this point, that having you around felt natural, felt right.

“He’s definitely in love. Look at him,” Jaemin whispers to his dormmate, just out of Mark’s earshot. Jeno’s eyes only crinkle slightly, as he shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter if he won’t do anything about it.”

The first time someone called Donghyuck a himbo was sophomore year.

He had sat next to Shin Ryujin, hungover from the night before, and it took him a full fifteen minutes to realise that he did indeed have an assignment due that day, one which his professor was currently collecting.

Naturally, he did what any desperate student would do - he turned to Ryujin and asked very nicely if he could borrow her work, to which she had only ignored him and turned back to her own laptop.

“It’s a creative assignment. Mrs Park’s not going to scroll through two identical assignments without busting your ass.”

“I could change some of the grammar,” Donghyuck offers helpfully, but the glare that she flashes him makes him shrink back.

“Just ask her for an extension.”

“I’m scared.”

“You’re already known as the campus himbo. What do you have to be scared of?”

“A himbo?” Donghyuck tilts his head. He hasn’t heard anyone describe him as a himbo yet, though he’s received things like idiot, annoying asshole, dumbass motherfu- most of them from Mark, but he doesn’t quite mention that to Shin Ryujin.

“It means you’re pretty to look at, but you’ve got nothing inside your head.”

Donghyuck grins. “You think I’m pretty?” he asks, batting his eyelashes for dramatic effect, and Ryujin rolls her eyes. “Even if you were pretty, your personality ruins it.”

“Hey!”

“I’m right, Donghyuck. You’re a daily reminder to me why I’m better off liking women,” she shoots, and he feels genuinely wounded at that.

“You just like women because you think Yeji’s pretty-” Donghyuck’s voice is muffled by Ryujin’s hand over his mouth, her gaze wide with alarm.

“She’s right there, Donghyuck. Mouth shut, or I’ll kill you,” she whispers harshly, eyes darting nervously to the girl she’s had a not-so-secret crush on for the longest time, before turning back to Donghyuck, who nods obediently.

“You should just tell her,” he advises, and Ryujin purses her lips, before shaking her head. “No. For one, I’m not sure if she likes women at all, and two - even if she did, I might not be her type.”

“Well, you can try.”

“And get rejected? No thanks,” she replies, closing the tabs on her laptop. “Besides, you shouldn’t been giving me advice. You would barely know if someone liked you back.”

Donghyuck supposes Ryujin was right then - he’s quite oblivious to cues, and God knows the number of girls that have confessed to him while he blinked at them cluelessly. It’s not his fault that he’s on the affectionate side, and Donghyuck is affectionate with everyone.

But now, this is different. This doesn’t involve him, and Donghyuck would like to think that he’s at least quite perceptive to a shift in two of his closest friends.

It doesn’t take him long to figure out why exactly Mark seems so skittish in your presence, or why you seem so tightly wound-up, like a spring about to snap.

The both of you have the largest, most embarrassing crushes on each other, and are somehow simultaneously oblivious to it.

And so, like every other normal, rational person, Donghyuck invites everyone except you and Mark to lunch to discuss his findings.

“What the fuck?” Renjun’s the first one to say something, staring at Donghyuck as if he’s grown a second head.

“Look, just trust me on this-”

“Are you sure about this?” Jaemin asks, taking a large sip of his drink, and Donghyuck nods earnestly, a serious expression on his face. “A hundred percent.”

“To be fair to him, we did all think they were going to date in the first year. I guess it’s finally happening.”

“Men and women can have platonic relationships, you know. Just because you have never enjoyed female friendship in your life doesn’t mean it’s impossible,” Ryujin points out to Jeno, who rolls his eyes.

“You thought they were dating too, Shin.”

“Fine,” she acquiesces, finally turning to Donghyuck and staring him down in a way that makes the male have to consciously bite back a shiver. “What do you plan to do about it?”

“That’s why I called you guys here.”

“You want us to help you figure out how to get your two best friends together?”

“They’re your friends too!”

“I say we lock them in a room until they kiss,” Chenle says, and like clockwork, Jisung turns to him, a look of horror on his face. “You can’t do that to people!”

But Chenle’s not looking at his best friend - no, he’s looking at Donghyuck, a silent challenge in his gaze.

It’s only then that Donghyuck sits up, posture changing enough to draw the eyes of everyone at the table - Karina, Yeji, Ryujin, Jeno, Chenle, Jisung, Jaemin and Renjun.

“You know what?” he says, a mischievous smile curling at the corner of his lips. “I don’t think that’s a bad idea.”

You’re halfway through your work when you hear a few rapid knocks at the door.

“Coming!” you shout, frowning - Mark’s out late tonight.

Until you look through the peephole, and you’re greeted by the sight of Jaemin’s face. “Oh, hey,” you say as you open the door. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m not sure, honestly. I brought them, though.” He points his arm, and you turn, eyes widening.

“He helped with directions,” Donghyuck explains, already shrugging off his shoes and letting himself into your apartment.

“What- why’s everyone here today?” You naturally move to the side as all eight of them slowly amble in, completely bewildered.

“Impromptu party. Jeno’s boss gave him some free pizza delivery vouchers,” Yeji explains, smiling sweetly at you, and despite the suddenness of it, you can’t quite say no - you do miss having them around, and you can probably catch up on your work over the weekend.

“Okay. Mark won’t be back till nine, though.” At your words, there seems to be a general sense of amusement rising from everyone else, which is only enough to confuse you further.

However, you’re grateful for their appearance. You don’t think you could last another movie night with Mark without doing something extremely, extremely stupid.

At eight, Mark reaches his front door, only for it to be opened before he can even reach for his keys.

And instead of you, there’s Jisung, who only waves. “Hi, hyung.”

“What are you doing here?” Mark asks, until he hears the sound of commotion inside - there’s music playing, and Donghyuck trying to explain something loudly before your laughter cuts through.

“Jeno bought all of us pizza. You should be hungry,” Jisung says, smiling, and Mark only follows the younger boy inside, greeted by the sight of everyone else scattered across the living room floor.

“Mark!” Jaemin shouts excitedly, and he realises the boy is already half-drunk as he motions to the multiple pizza boxes. “Take as much as you want. Can’t finish.”

And as Mark grabs the pizza and makes his way over to where you’re seated by the couch, you smile up at him in a way that makes it impossible for him to grin back. “You’re here,” you say softly, cheeks already slightly reddened by the alcohol.

He laughs slightly. “Are you drunk already?”

You shake your head. “I only drank a little.” You pinch your fingers together for emphasis.

“Okay. Go easy on it,” he says, and you pout slightly. “Got it.”

“Since Mark’s here already, we should all play a game,” Chenle suggests, and Mark looks up, eyes widening when he sees everyone nod. “Suddenly?”

“How about truth or dare?” Ryujin asks.

“No, that’s too boring. Wait, Mark, come here,” Donghyuck says from the opposite side of the room, pushing Jisung slightly to make space for him in the middle, but Mark shakes his head.

“I’m okay here.” Besides, he wants to make sure you don’t drink as much.

“Just come here. Yeji has something she needs to tell Y/N.” At that, Mark turns to the black-haired girl, a suspicious glance in his eyes.

“Oh yeah, totally,” she says, grinning back, and motions for Mark to move. “Girls only, Mark. I know you’re Y/N’s best friend, but some exceptions can’t be made.”

Everyone’s waiting, which means Mark eventually rises from where he’s standing. “Okay. Make sure she doesn’t drink too much, okay?” he asks, and she nods.

When Mark’s finally cross-legged on the floor, Donghyuck clasps his hands together, a grin on his face. “Let’s do seven minutes in heaven. Jeno, spin that bottle.”

Mark turns to his best friend, nudging him. “What are we, in high school?”

“We’re not, which is why I wanna play this. Also, everyone here at least knows each other. so it’s more fun.”

There’s silence in the room as the soju bottle spins in slow rounds, before it finally drifts to a stop - one that has Donghyuck giggling and Ryujin’s cheeks reddening.

“Ryujin and Yeji. First room on the right, now,” he instructs, and the two girls rise, disappearing down the hallway and already lost in their own conversation.

“Next one. I wanna spin this,” Chenle says, exchanging an odd, knowing sort of look with Hyuck, who only motions for him to go ahead.

Mark’s honestly only half-focused on the game, more worried about he’s going to clean up later and whether any of them will be staying over. Eventually, however, his gaze drifts to the floor, watching as the bottle comes to a perfect stop.

Facing you directly.

Yeji’s gone and you’re the only one sitting on the right side of the couch, which makes you the obvious choice.

The other side is a little more ambiguous, however. It’s between him and Hyuck, who looks a little too excited. “Well, so who’s going to go with me?” you ask, and everyone else seems to be unsure of what to say.

“I mean, I don’t mind,” Donghyuck says teasingly, winking at you in a way that makes Mark stiffen.

There’s no way Hyuck likes you, right? That all this was just some sort of grand, elaborated scheme to get closer to you-

You fell for her too, idiot, his mind immediately rattles off, and it’s enough for Mark to stand up, immediately clearing his throat. “I’ll go. The empty room left is mine anyways.”

He misses the way his best friend smiles triumphantly at Chenle, immediately moving closer to you as you stand up. “Seven minutes, right?” you ask, and Hyuck nods. “No more, no less.”

Mark’s not sure why he’s strangely nervous as he follows you into the room, considering he’s pretty sure that nothing will happen anyways. After all, the both of you practically live together, and he’s no stranger to spending time alone with you.

Though, in the wake of his new feelings, even simple interactions feel difficult.

And as you lie down on the side of his bed, legs dangling off the edge, Mark regrets his decision just a little. Until you lift your head up.

“Why are you standing there? Come here.” You pat the empty space next to you, and as if pulled by some mysterious force, he gravitates towards you, hesitantly sitting next to your knees and slowly lying down next to you.

“I wonder what Hyuck would say if he found us like this,” you say, and despite himself, Mark laughs. “We would get scolded.”

“He’d probably ask us to do something, at least.”

Mark’s cheeks redden as he wonders what exactly you mean by something, and he’s not sure if your straightforwardness is partly due to the alcohol. “Like what?”

“I don’t know. Kiss, probably.”

He sucks in a breath, turning to you. But your profile remains sideways, eyes fixed on the ceiling. And he’s not sure where he finds the words, but Mark’s voice is strained the next time he speaks, tight with desire and fear.

“Do you- do you want to?”

You turn to him, pretty irises deep enough for Mark to willingly, gladly drown in.

God, you’re gorgeous. He’s so painfully in love with you that it almost hurts to breathe, little pinpricks of affection stabbing at what space remaining in his heart that’s still left untaken by you.

“I wouldn’t mind, I think,” you murmur, blinking sleepily at him as you shuffle a little bit closer, until your head’s resting against his chest, and Mark wonders if you can hear his heartbeat going faster than it ever has.

You wouldn’t mind kissing him. It’s not a direct expression of want, but if you’re amenable to the idea, that’s already more than he could ever expect.

You’re so close, and you smell so good, like that vanilla and cinnamon shampoo that you always use, and if he just tilted your head a little higher - he would have everything that he’s dreaming of.

But you’re drunk, and he’s not entirely sober either, which means bad decisions are likely to be made. When Mark kisses you, he wants it to be when both of you are fully awake, so he can remember every single moment of it.

And the feeling of you resting against him, eyes closed and breathing even, isn’t so bad either - it’s sweet, providing him with the knowledge that you feel safe enough to be your most vulnerable around him, because Mark just wants to protect you and love you in all the ways that he can. If you’ll let him.

And that’s how Donghyuck finds him when he cracks open the bedroom door, Mark immediately bringing a finger to his lips to keep his volume down.

“Um, I’ll tell everyone to clean up and leave. You can stay with Y/N,” Hyuck murmurs, and Mark’s grateful for the sensibility that his best friend does have, after all.

It’s about twenty minutes later that he finally hears the front door swing shut, and the house finally falls into some much-needed silence.

“Y/N,” he whispers softly, hoping to wake you up without startling you. “Darling, you’ll be uncomfortable if you sleep like this.”

He’s not sure where the pet name slips out from, but it comes out surprisingly easily. And while Mark would be perfectly happy to stay in this position, it’s likely going to give you a poor neck tomorrow.

Thankfully, you seem to hear him, mumbling something incoherent as you slowly sit up, still drowsy as he leads you to the bed. You find the pillow quickly, and he breathes out a sigh of relief when you seem to sink back into your slumber.

“Good night, Y/N,” he mumbles tenderly, a hand brushing over your forehead.

And when he finally lies down on the other side, blanket thrown over the both of you, Mark wills sleep to find him quickly. There’s too much on his mind tonight.

At some point, however, you shift, turning your body to face him and making his breathing hitch.

You’re always so damn close.

And then you say something again under your breath, soft enough for Mark to have to lean closer until your lips are right by his ear.

“Y/N? Do you need something?” It’s obvious you’re still asleep, maybe stuck in a dream of sorts as you furrow your eyebrows.

When you speak next, however, it’s loud enough for Mark to hear every syllable.

“You don’t want to kiss me,” you breathe out, an expression of distress making its way onto your features. “Why not?” Your lips soften into a pout that makes his heart seize, and Mark’s eyes widen.

Are you talking about him? From earlier?

He’s frozen now, fingers ghosting over your waist as he wonders how to react.

Eventually, Mark allows himself to press a tender kiss to your forehead, smoothing out the slight furrow there as he brushes his thumb over your cheek.

The bed, even the entire room, suddenly feels a little too small, and a little too warm as Mark keeps looking at you, wondering exactly what this means for him, you, and your friendship.

If everything he’s ever wanted is a mistake, and whether you’d make it with him. Because he doesn’t think any mistake should feel this right.

When you wake up the next morning, you can’t exactly distinguish between what was part of your dream, and what was actually a hazy recollection.

And neither is Mark present to confirm your doubts. It’s like he’s disappeared off the face of the earth - well, probably just the campus.

Still, when you see an empty bed, the sheets on the side flat and crinkled, there’s a yearning in your heart that you can’t quite place. You swing your feet over the edge, your head still vaguely throbbing from the alcohol as you try to distinguish reality from your own eager imagination.

You like Mark. That much is easy enough to figure out, if the way you clung to him last night was any indication. You faintly remember him persuading you to go to bed, and tugging a sweater over your shirt.

And then you had turned over - heart racing in your chest as you voluntarily moved closer to him, seeking his warmth and relaxing when he didn’t pull away.

His bed smelled a lot like him, all fresh cotton and fabric softener. A familiar scent that you had grown used to over the years, from stealing his jackets to hugging him whenever he pulled you close, your head nestled into the crook of his shoulder.

You’re conflicted as you stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror, fingers curling into the material of the sweater as if it’ll make up for the owner’s absence.

Maybe he liked you. Maybe he didn’t. You would get some answers once he came back, at least.

Unfortunately, you’re in the middle of brushing your teeth when you hear the front door unlock, and you suppose the universe has other plans for you as you shuffle out into the living room.

And as if you still needed the reminder, your pulse speeds up at the sight of Mark in his hoodie and black glasses, plates already in his hands as he places them on the table. “Hey, um, I got breakfast. Figured you’d be hungry,” he explains.

You’re just staring at him, lingering in the hallway long enough for Mark to scratch the back of his head awkwardly. “Hey, if you don’t feel like eating-”

“I do.” It comes out panicked as you rush over, taking the cutlery from him and the first pastry you see. “Thanks, Mark.”

“No problem,” he says, still smiling at you as you take your first bite, occasionally meeting his eyes before your gaze darts away again.

God, this is awkward. You haven’t been this awkward with him since- well, ever. Even eighteen-year-old you had no problem making conversation with him, but now you’re completely silent as the both of you share a meal.

You’re in the middle of counting the number of cross-stitches in the tablecloth when he finally speaks.

“How’s your head feeling?”

“It’s okay.”

“Donghyuck and the others left pretty early yesterday.”

“Yeah.”

“They cleaned up, though.”

“That’s good.”

You can almost sense the frustration radiating off Mark at your replies, but you’re not sure what else to say to him.

Or more that you’re scared of what will come out if you do let yourself speak.

“Y/N,” he murmurs, noticeably more serious now, and you gulp.

“Mark.”

“Can we talk about yesterday?” he asks, gently, and you lift your head sharply, fork frozen in midair.

“What- what happened yesterday?”

“You don’t remember?”

“I-” you cut yourself off halfway, cheeks turning scarlet as you duck your head down to look at your own lap.

It’s as much of a guilty admission that he needs, even as you attempt to get yourself out of the situation by standing up and pushing your chair behind you. “I’m done with my breakfast. I’ll go get ready.”

“You’re going out?”

“I told Ryujin that I would meet her for lunch,” you lie, though you wince the moment it leaves your mouth.

For one, it’s ten in the morning, and Ryujin’s probably just as hungover as you.

You barely put your plate down in the sink before you hear Mark get up as well, and you turn your head away, cursing silently under your breath. It’s times like this when you wish your apartment was bigger, that Mark couldn’t be capable of finding you in less than two minutes.

He doesn’t say anything, almost hovering as he clears his plate away too, and places the rest of the pastries in the fridge.

You can’t help but notice that they’re all your favourites, the kind of snacks that you always tell him you crave but never have conveniently at home.

The moment you’re done washing the dishes, however, you quickly dry your hands, making a beeline out of the kitchen area. If you just manage to get to your room, you’ll at least be able to avoid him for a while longer.

And for a few moments, you think that Mark will let you go and leave the events of last night aside for now.

In fact, you almost make it past him and the kitchen island, before he grabs onto your wrist and yanks you back.

“What-” You tilt your head up sharply in shock, freezing when you realize exactly how close the both of you are. The tip of his nose is barely centimetres away from yours, and your lack of balance has you almost leaning fully into him, the weight of your body pressed up against his.

You’re still reeling from it as you blink up at him, finding a way to get your senses back around you, even as your brain fills with empty thoughts about how he looks good up close like this, or how his lashes frame his features perfectly.

It’s a dangerous situation. One that you need to get out of immediately.

“Mark-” you start, his name coming out breathy and stilted, but the boy remains silent, lips set into a firm line as he continues looking at you, or past you, as if he's thinking of something else entirely. “Let me go?”

You move your wrist for emphasis, but in response, his grip only tightens.

“No,” he murmurs, in a way that makes butterflies flutter in your stomach.

“But-”

You’re cut off soon enough when he moves even closer, the distance between the both of you disappearing.

Because instead of releasing your hand, Mark only wraps his other arm around your waist to yank you closer before he plants his lips firmly on yours.

And then he’s kissing you.

Mark Lee, your best friend and roommate of four years, is kissing you in your shared apartment at ten in the morning, and you can’t help but feel like this is how it’s always meant to have been.

And as you feel yourself melting into his hold, that same scent of fresh cotton enveloping you, he pulls away. Kissing shouldn’t feel this good, but with him, you think the seconds could easily elapse into hours.

You’re almost tempted to pull him by the collar back to you, but something in his eyes curbs that impulse of yours.

His hand is still resting on your waist, ghosting over the patch of bare skin between your sweatpants and top in a way that makes you shiver.

“You asked me why I didn’t want to kiss you yesterday,” he breathes out. “Does this make up for it?”

So that wasn’t a dream, at least.

You scramble to find a way to reply, still a little too distracted by the way his lips are the perfect shade of pink, the phantom feeling of them quickly fading from your memory. “I- I think so.”

He smiles at that. “You think?”

“I could do with a refresher.” The sudden confidence that enters your voice is just as surprising to you as it is to Mark himself, but he recovers faster. The hand that was previously around your wrist snakes its way up to your chin, tilting your face upwards. “Yeah?”

You nod, deciding that you’re already too far gone- you might as well get something out of it.

Like the feeling of Mark’s lips against yours when he kisses you again, smiling against you in a way that makes your heart expand in the most delightful way.

When he nips at your bottom lip playfully, you let out a soft giggle, ducking your head away from his as he moves towards your cheek, and then your neck, leaving a trail of feather-soft kisses in his wake.

“That feels nice,” you sigh out, feeling him smirk against where he’s nestled at the juncture of your shoulder and neck. “Just nice?”

“Very nice. Happy now?” You tap his shoulders to get him to raise his head, Mark’s hands instinctively finding your waist.

He hums. “I suppose. What does this make us?”

And as much as he tries to pass it off nonchalantly, you hear the way his voice tapers off into doubt.

That he’s had the same fear as you for a while now, but also the exact same dream.

“Do you like me?” you ask, and Mark swipes his tongue over his lips, chuckling softly. “I thought that much was obvious.”

“Well, then I guess it’s a good thing that I like you too.” You fiddle with the drawstrings of his hoodie as Mark’s eyes widen. To his credit, he looks surprised, but it only makes you laugh. “You seriously think I would kiss you if I didn’t like you?”

“Well, I wasn’t sure-” his words halt when you tiptoe to press a kiss on his cheek.

“I like you, Mark Lee. Even if you can’t cook eggs and always mess up my laundry. And I know you’re already my best friend and roommate, but will you be willing to take up another title now?”

“What title?’ he asks, blinking confusedly at you, and you only grin. “My boyfriend,” you whisper into his ear, pulling back to see that familiar shade of red making its way onto his cheeks.

Eventually, he nods. “Yeah. Okay. I can do that.”

But you only frown. “You took so long to reply. I’m starting to think you don’t want it anymore.”

Mark only rolls his eyes, arms tightening their hug around your waist.

“Too bad. There’s no getting rid of me now.”

Funnily enough, the hardest part of being in a relationship with Mark was figuring out how to tell everyone else without being made the subject of their endless teasing for the next foreseeable few months.

Especially Donghyuck. Both you and Mark agreed that the chestnut-haired boy would be the last to find out.

Everything else was the same. The both of you always ate together, Mark often picking you up after lessons with a take-out bag already in his hands.

Except that he was now yours to kiss and hold, which was a new privilege you gladly took advantage of, especially on occasions like this.

“I say we let them find out on their own. It’s worse if we tell them directly, like it’s some sort of big announcement,” you say, fingers absentmindedly carding their way through Mark’s hair as he hugs you close to him. You’re leaning against the couch, legs thrown over his as you rest on his lap sideways.

He only raises a bemused eyebrow. “You don’t think our relationship is a big thing?”

“We both know that’s not what I mean,” you mutter, swatting his shoulder. “I just think they’ve known us as best friends for so long, that it’ll be weird to just suddenly drop this out of nowhere.”

“I get it. We can tell them whenever you want.”

The current position you’re in is more than comfortable, and you find yourself growing drowsy as he peppers kisses along your cheek and your shoulder.

“But, Y/N-” he starts, and despite your sudden onset of drowsiness, you make a little noise of assent. it’s enough for Mark to hug you tighter to him, before continuing.

“You know you’re still my best friend no matter what, right? This-” he gestures to the both of you, smiling gently, “doesn’t change anything.”

His words hit you harder than you want to let on, and you try not to make your emotions too plain your face as you lean against his shoulder, feeling his heart beat gently against his chest.

However, your words still come out slightly choked. “Yeah, I know.”

“I’m quite lucky, don’t you think? A best friend and a girlfriend in the same person.”

“Donghyuck won’t be happy to hear that,” you mutter, and you feel the vibrations of Mark’s chest as he laughs, a loud one that you know is genuine. The very sound itself is enough to make you smile.

“Thank God he’s not here, then.”

“I am, actually.”

The voice that materializes from the hallway is enough to make you jump and almost fall off Mark’s lap, right as he catches you. You scramble to get off his lap, hands moving to your lap as Donghyuck walks into the living room, arms crossed.

“How the fuck did you get in?” you ask, and Donghyuck lifts his hand up, a glint of metal twirled in his fingers. “Spare key. Mark showed me once when he was drunk off his ass.”

“And you didn’t knock?”

“I did. Many times, actually. You two lovebirds just tuned it all out. Besides, what’s the worst that could happen?”

“For one, this is a private apartment.”

“I mean, if the both of you were having sex, I’d probably hear it first and show myself out,” he shoots back nonchalantly, and your eyes widen at the same time that Mark lets out an embarrassed cough, which only makes Donghyuck let out a surprised laugh.

“Haven’t gotten there yet, huh?” He’s smirking now, looking at the both of you beneath his eyelashes in a way that makes you want to throttle him.

“Let’s- let’s talk about something else,” you mutter, and Donghyuck shrugs. “Sure. I came here to tell you guys that we’ve settled everything for the winter break trip. We leave in four days, once semester ends.”

“You came all the way here just for that?” you ask suspiciously, and the boy smiles as if he’s been caught.

“Um, I haven’t had lunch. Also, I don’t have any beach shorts, and Mark has a few he can lend.”

You nod, before narrowing your eyes. “You’re not going to tell the rest, right?”

“Not yet. But only because I want to see their reactions when I do,” Donghyuck replies, and you huff under your breath. It’s good enough for now.

“Then sit down. And help me prep the ingredients for lunch.” At your words, Donghyuck immediately straightens into a mock salute. “Got it.”

The gesture makes you laugh slightly as you go to the fridge, setting out everything on the counter. But Donghyuck seems to be deep in thought, almost orbiting around you.

After a while, however, he eventually opens his mouth, unable to contain his curiosity any longer.

“…So you guys really haven’t fucked?”

“Shut it, Donghyuck.”

“I didn’t even mean to kiss him!” Yeji shouts, sitting up in her chair to defend herself. “The alcohol made him seem a lot more good-looking than he actually was.”

Karina only laughs behind her cup. “You just have shit taste in men.”

“Which is why I have a girlfriend now,” she says, grinning widely as she grabs Ryujin’s hand. The latter only rolls her eyes.

The eleven of you are gathered around a campfire, blankets bundled over your laps as you take turns dangling marshmallows over the fire. You can’t even remember whose idea it was to come down to the coast to escape winter for a few weeks, but as the sea breeze blows through your hair, you’re grateful for it.

“This is nice,” Chenle says, resting his feet on a stool as he leans back, sunglasses over his eyes.

“Says the one who refused to leave the house at first,” Donghyuck snides, earning an elbow in the side.

“Can the both of you just stop bickering for one second?” Jaemin says from across the circle, exasperated. “Let’s talk about something else.”

“Well, if you want to hear about more idiots that Yeji has kissed while drunk-” Karina’s offer is cut off by the aforementioned girl kicking her in the shin, cheeks bright with mortification.

“I’m one of those idiots, unfortunately,” Ryujin shoots back, earning huffs of amusement from everyone as she defends her girlfriend.

“Speaking of that…” Karina trails off, gaze drifting to you and Mark in a way that makes you shift nervously, eyes darting away from hers as you laugh nervously. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

She leans back, a sly glint in her eyes as she scrutinizes every minute shift of your features. “You were the second couple that night to go in. Did anything happen?”

Everyone else is paying attention now, even as they try to hide it.

Your eyes go to Donghyuck for a second, who only has a shit-eating grin on his face. From his expression, you can tell the man is practically jumping out of his seat at the prospect of being the one to reveal your newly-formed relationship with Mark.

Which means you have to beat him first.

“Yeah. We’re dating now,” you mutter, hiding your grin with a sip of your hot chocolate as the entire group turns silent. Even Mark looks at you, surprised, but his face quickly transforms into one of smug happiness as he grabs your hand, fingers interlacing with yours. “We are,” he confirms, and Karina’s eyes widen beyond what you thought possible.

“Whoa. Whoa. Hold on- when did this happen?”

“The morning after,” you supplicate, and she rests her forehead on her hands as she blinks.

“Good to know the both of you had it in you,” Chenle says, smiling at you in a way that’s equal parts teasing and sweet. “By the way, you should probably give credit to Hyuck. He was the first to notice, you know.”

“Really?”

“Wasn’t difficult when the both of you were staring at each other like lovestruck idiots,” he says, and you roll your eyes. You suppose you owe the man a word of thanks, eventually. Just not right now.

“I’m happy for you guys.” Jaemin, the sweetest of your group, smiles widely at the both of you, and Mark pats him on the back in a sign of affection. “Really. It was a long time coming.”

“I guess it was, huh?” Mark says, turning towards you with a contemplative sort of joy on his features. Despite the dim lighting, it’s almost as if there’s stars in his eyes as he looks at you, hand still tightly holding on to yours.

“God, couples make me sick,” Donghyuck mutters, earning a glare from you and Yeji. “You can leave, then,” you shoot back, pressing a kiss to Mark’s cheek in a sign of defiance.

“You bet I will-”

“Speaking of that,” Jaemin, always the mediator, cuts Donghyuck off. “It’s late. We should probably head back to the cabins.”

“Sounds good to me,” Karina says, standing up and folding her blanket over her chair. “God, it’s cold.”

“You cold?” Mark asks, and you shake your head, only zipping up your jacket as all of you make the slow trek back to your cabins at the end of the beach. Thanks to the off-season, you and Mark are sharing one, while Yeji, Ryujin and Karina take the larger house, with the other villas split between the six guys.

Eventually, you reach the doorstep of your cabin, waving farewell to the rest as they shrug off their shoes and unlock the doors. “Goodnight!” Yeji shouts, and you grin widely as you wave at her, the wind whipping your hair around your face.

Thankfully, the inside of the cabin offers a respite from the cold, and you find yourself quickly moving towards the woollen blanket on the couch. “Tired?” Mark asks, leaning against the armrest to face you directly, and you shake your head, eyes still bright. “Not at all. I think being on holiday keeps me awake.”

“Wanna watch a movie, then?” he asks, and you nod eagerly, stretching your arms out to pull him towards you.

“Come here,” you urge, making him stretch out his legs on the couch before you lie against him, legs tangled with his and back comfortably resting against his chest.

“Someone’s clingy today,” he points out, bemused.

“I haven’t gotten to be with you alone since we left for the trip yesterday. Let a girl have what she wants.”

At your words, he nods, lips curving up as his arms settle around your waist, a kiss pressed to your hairline. “I can do that for my girl.”

“My girl?” you ask, and he nods. “You’ve always been my girl. Even if you didn’t know it then.”

“I guess I like it. You can keep calling me that,” you reply, and he nips at your ear. “You looked good tonight, by the way,” you tell him, turning around momentarily to face him.

He’s wearing a fleece jacket over one of his graphic tees, somehow still choosing to wear ripped jeans despite the cold weather.

“I would say that back to you, but I’m guessing you already know,” he says, and you duck your head down, giggling softly.

“I suppose you also know that I love you. In case that wasn’t obvious enough,” he adds after a while, as if not quite sure what you’ll make of it. But you’re quick to nod.

“I love you too, Mark Lee. You’re everything to me.”

You’ve never meant anything more, and he seems to be a little starstruck as he looks at you, an utter look of adoration in his eyes. “How did I get so damn lucky?” he asks softly, and it’s enough to knock the breath out of your chest as your heart carves out even more space for him.

It’s only when Mark tilts your chin up that you go silent, eyes widening slightly. He’s staring directly at you, until he isn’t.

Because his gaze drops down to your lips, his thumb coming up to brush the corner in a way that makes you freeze.

“Can I kiss you?” he murmurs, and the question is so sweet, so earnest, that it makes you smile.

“You never have to ask,” you reply, and your boyfriend doesn’t hesitate before he’s pulling you mouth towards his and closing whatever little distance there is left.

Kissing Mark feels like sinking into a soft pillow after a long day, something that’s all too easy for you to melt into as you thread your fingers through the black strands at the nape of his neck. It’s surprisingly easy to do, the both of you moving naturally as if you’ve been doing this forever.

And when you find your kisses travelling down towards his neck, you take note of each soft exhale that he lets out, grip occasionally tightening around your waist.

Your hands are travelling too, going past his neck to his arms, and then ghosting down his sides, before you eventually find yourself preferring to fidget with the torn threads and rips in his jeans, occasionally tracing little shapes over the exposed skin of his thigh.

“You- you really should stop doing that,” he forces out after a while, the tension in his voice making you smile.

“Are you sure?” you ask, looking up for a second to take in the conflict evident in his features. “N-no. But it feels good.”

His tone is almost whiny, the little note of desperation in it making pleasurable heat curl in your stomach. “That was the goal, I think,” you shoot back sarcastically, and he laughs darkly, toying with the zipper at the side of your skirt.

You see the change as it happens, his eyes dimming just imperceptibly as something in it changes, a newfound determination in him as he presses one last bruising kiss to your lips.

“Don’t get snarky with me now. We still have the entire night, you know,” he reminds, and you find yourself quickly swelling with an unfamiliar sort of excitement, tinted with an almost delectable sort of fear as he pulls you even closer, fingertip tracing down the side of your face.

“And we have this entire place to ourselves, so what are you planning?” you ask, arching an eyebrow curiously, which causes Mark to smile teasingly. This side of him is so unfamiliar to you, and yet you love every moment of it as your pulse races, blood and adrenaline rushing through your veins in equal measure.

“You’ll find out soon enough, baby.”

This time, when he guides your mouth to his, you gladly let him steal your oxygen.

taglist: @makiswrld @kittydollzz @littlefluu @alethea-moon@jamaisunoo @haunteddeputymugpersona @95cheols @bonnie-itz @sharkipoonis @lcvehyvck @ujisworld @mentally-married-to-johnny-suh @beomyomom @mad2lyn @emvrd @tonicandjins @cas104 @poppysfieldnotes @spicyutas @nuttie-nv-blog @jvjsssnaa @liliansun @haechoshi @shwizhies

(some of you couldn't be tagged :( )

from this tumblr prompt post by @smurfet !

warning/s: angst and crying:(

silence — lmh.

in which he can’t seem to let you love him.

—

you hadn’t really noticed him, he was always quiet and stuck to his small circle of friends. the boy whose hair never seemed to stay one color, the boy who would only laugh when he was among his friends—the boy whose name was mark lee.

“who?” when your friend had pointed out that he was “so checking you out!”, you didn’t really know how to feel.

your eyes meet his for a brief moment—before he’s looking away a slight blush on his cheeks as his friends erupt into a burst of loud laughter. and it was like the world was on his side, because you started to see more of him.

“i’m so sorry!” his smooth voice distracted you from the sound of your books and papers scattering all over the floor. his movements were frantic as he goes to pick up your fallen items. “it’s okay, really.”

he likes to think it was your smile that had his heart racing, the easygoing and friendly one that always seemed to grace your face. that what he was doing—reaching out, trying to get the chance to talk to you even when he had literally no reason to other than the fact that he liked your voice—was totally reasonable. you could be acquaintances, who talked. almost every day.

“so, how’s it going with y/n?” jaemin would casually bring you up, now that you both were talking on a regular basis. mark felt a weird heat rise from his neck to his ears, stumbling to reply to his younger friend.

“it’s alright. she’s a great girl,” the boys around him let out loud whoops, raising their imaginary glasses in a sort of toast. “i’m happy for you.”

renjun’s smile is gentle as he pats mark’s back. he was scared. truly. he didn’t know why he was feeling the way he did and didn’t believe you could return the way his heart was pounding.

but you did. you loved the way he strummed his guitar with a hidden confidence and the way his eyes would disappear as he laughed. the months you both had spent talking were great and he made you feel the most alive.

there were days where you’d catch his eyes on you and the subtle pink tint on his cheeks as he looks away. you’d find him upset when you were wearing someone else’s jacket. you were sure, so sure that he liked you back. that he would catch you because you were falling. falling for the boy who built a cage around his heart so—

“don’t.” you were confused. don’t?

“don’t love me, y/n.” his sad whisper nails you to your spot in front of him. you had your bag over your shoulder and his jacket around your body.

his eyes stared at you, sad and empty as he pleads with you. “i’m not worth it. not worth your love—“

“is that really your decision to make?” your voice comes out softer than you had liked. you didn’t want to cry but you felt your throat closing as the tears stung the back of your eyes. mark watches closely as you gulp down your feelings, face scrunching as you struggle to hold in the emotions wishing to break free.

his heart was breaking, but this was better. wasn’t it?

“i’m—i don’t love you.”

he had forced the words out. he knew he had to. he didn’t want to let himself feel the way he felt around you—because he could see it all leading down the same path.

“oh.”

your dejected face stayed etched in his mind as you walked away. as the tears won over your stubbornness, falling freely down your cheeks even when you were tugging off his jacket. he watched in silence as you disappeared, from him that night—from his life forever.

this was better. he knew it was. but why did it feel like it wasn’t?

—

my mark drabble debut! it’s sad, but i’m trying to get over my writer’s block huhu ;-;

wowowow user rnjfy posted wowowow this drabble is inspired by lauren spencer-smith’s song!! it’s really good and has me on my knees

fingers crossed — lmh.

in which he said he loved you but he must’ve had his fingers crossed.

—

the soft music rang throughout the fancy and definitely busy restaurant was a big contrast to the harsh pounding of your heart against your chest. the ice in your drink had melted—and the condensation had started to roll off the cool glass and onto the red cloth that lined your table.

“ma’am? if you’re not going to order anything, we’ll need to give up the table…” the assigned waitress looked at you with pity swirling in her eyes. this was the second time she’d approached you in the half hour you had sat and stared into nothing.

you could feel the embarassment creeping up your neck—but you swallowed it down as you smiled up at the young woman.

“sorry. you probably need the table… i’ll take my leave then.” after briefly bowing to apologize for any inconvenience, you wrapped your cardigan tighter around your shoulders as the cold wind greeted you.

you [7:16]: i’m at our table! the food looks really good, come soon! xx

no response. you wondered why you hoped for anything different, when all he seemed to be doing with you now is tolerating your presence. you terribly missed your boyfriend, but with how tonight was going you weren’t really sure how to feel.

the jingle of your keys sounded terribly loud as it echoed through you and your boyfriend’s empty apartment. you noticed the spot on your shoe rack where mark’s shoes were supposed to be—empty.

“as usual,” you mutter to no one in particular. the word ‘empty’ seemed to start to become a constant in your life.

your feet felt sore as you placed your keys in the small bowl you two had set up by the door.

“you suck at pottery.”

mark’s loud laugh surrounded the two of you as he struggled with the clay in his hands.

“dude! it’s crumbli—folding? what the hell!” he giggles as he tries to perfect the small bowl. your eyes lingered on his dark hair, his bangs falling slightly over his eyes.

“you suck at pottery.” you confirmed with a small nod, smiling at him as he rolls his eyes—a small smile curling at the edge of his lips.

“it’s just a unique bowl!”

your heart felt constricted in your chest. the small homey apartment that you two shared used to be close to what you would call your sanctuary.

now, you feel so so suffocated by the memories that would wash over you as you glanced over the decorations, furniture, artwork and other things that were scattered across your living space.

you walked slowly. the realization of what you need to do sinking in. your gaze catches the small couch that you both paid for.

“what d’you wanna watch?”

mark curls his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest as he flicks through the movies and shows netflix had to offer. you could hear his heartbeat going a mile a minute, but you leave your focus on the tv sat across from the two of you.

“what about friends?”

laughing loudly, mark quickly scrolls back up to the ‘watch again’ portion and clicks on the series you desperately loved.

burying his nose into your hair, “how are you not tired of this show?”

he giggles softly, the sound of the laugh track blending in with the silence of your apartment.

gulping down the memory, you start towards your shared bedroom. the sight of mark’s favorite guitar sitting next to your bed makes you uncomfortable, the tears in your shaky eyes seemed to be endless.

“y/n! c’mere. i wrote a song and uh… i wanted you to hear it, if that’s okay?”

the blush on mark’s face was something burned into your head. it was the most adorable sight and you never wanted to forget.

you nod, your hair bouncing at your shoulders as you sit next to him, watching as he clears his throat and fixes his fingers on the neck of his guitar.

his rough voice surrounds both your figures. the chords and the words—all of them blended so well together. they screamed mark, and you felt like you were falling in love all over again.

your movements felt robotic. you barely processed that your closet was now empty. mark’s clothes hung on their own, taking up only half of the large closet that occupied the left-hand side of your room.

the shine of your framed picture catches your gaze—it sat on your bedside table looking lonely now that you had taken your jewelry and other various knick knacks off the wooden table.

you pick it up shakily, your fingers caressing the smooth frame. the picture of you and mark on your first date, a concert. he had a bottle of water in his hand and his arm was slung around you.

his smile haunted you now, the look of love in both of your eyes felt taunting. your heart hurt even more.

a part of you longed to stay. to give yourself to mark, because at the end of the day, he’d come home. home to you. whispering apologies and empty promises of a next time.

but you were tired. and you’ve tried. you tried to stay. you tried to love him even when you knew he didn’t love you anymore.

the soft click of your apartment door sends a painful ripple from your heart to the rest of your body.

you stand there for a moment, your eyes closed as you whisper your last wish into the dead of the night.

i wish you said you loved me, when you didn’t have your fingers crossed.

—

in your face writer’s block!!!! i’m finally back with a drabble and hopefully this pushes my writer’s block fully away >:((( shares & likes are appreciated! i love you all <333

wowowow user rnjfy posted wowowow this drabble is inspired by lauren spencer-smith’s song!! it’s really good and has me on my knees

fingers crossed — lmh.

in which he said he loved you but he must’ve had his fingers crossed.

—

the soft music rang throughout the fancy and definitely busy restaurant was a big contrast to the harsh pounding of your heart against your chest. the ice in your drink had melted—and the condensation had started to roll off the cool glass and onto the red cloth that lined your table.

“ma’am? if you’re not going to order anything, we’ll need to give up the table…” the assigned waitress looked at you with pity swirling in her eyes. this was the second time she’d approached you in the half hour you had sat and stared into nothing.

you could feel the embarassment creeping up your neck—but you swallowed it down as you smiled up at the young woman.

“sorry. you probably need the table… i’ll take my leave then.” after briefly bowing to apologize for any inconvenience, you wrapped your cardigan tighter around your shoulders as the cold wind greeted you.

you [7:16]: i’m at our table! the food looks really good, come soon! xx

no response. you wondered why you hoped for anything different, when all he seemed to be doing with you now is tolerating your presence. you terribly missed your boyfriend, but with how tonight was going you weren’t really sure how to feel.

the jingle of your keys sounded terribly loud as it echoed through you and your boyfriend’s empty apartment. you noticed the spot on your shoe rack where mark’s shoes were supposed to be—empty.

“as usual,” you mutter to no one in particular. the word ‘empty’ seemed to start to become a constant in your life.

your feet felt sore as you placed your keys in the small bowl you two had set up by the door.

“you suck at pottery.”

mark’s loud laugh surrounded the two of you as he struggled with the clay in his hands.

“dude! it’s crumbli—folding? what the hell!” he giggles as he tries to perfect the small bowl. your eyes lingered on his dark hair, his bangs falling slightly over his eyes.

“you suck at pottery.” you confirmed with a small nod, smiling at him as he rolls his eyes—a small smile curling at the edge of his lips.

“it’s just a unique bowl!”

your heart felt constricted in your chest. the small homey apartment that you two shared used to be close to what you would call your sanctuary.

now, you feel so so suffocated by the memories that would wash over you as you glanced over the decorations, furniture, artwork and other things that were scattered across your living space.

you walked slowly. the realization of what you need to do sinking in. your gaze catches the small couch that you both paid for.

“what d’you wanna watch?”

mark curls his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest as he flicks through the movies and shows netflix had to offer. you could hear his heartbeat going a mile a minute, but you leave your focus on the tv sat across from the two of you.

“what about friends?”

laughing loudly, mark quickly scrolls back up to the ‘watch again’ portion and clicks on the series you desperately loved.

burying his nose into your hair, “how are you not tired of this show?”

he giggles softly, the sound of the laugh track blending in with the silence of your apartment.

gulping down the memory, you start towards your shared bedroom. the sight of mark’s favorite guitar sitting next to your bed makes you uncomfortable, the tears in your shaky eyes seemed to be endless.

“y/n! c’mere. i wrote a song and uh… i wanted you to hear it, if that’s okay?”

the blush on mark’s face was something burned into your head. it was the most adorable sight and you never wanted to forget.

you nod, your hair bouncing at your shoulders as you sit next to him, watching as he clears his throat and fixes his fingers on the neck of his guitar.

his rough voice surrounds both your figures. the chords and the words—all of them blended so well together. they screamed mark, and you felt like you were falling in love all over again.

your movements felt robotic. you barely processed that your closet was now empty. mark’s clothes hung on their own, taking up only half of the large closet that occupied the left-hand side of your room.

the shine of your framed picture catches your gaze—it sat on your bedside table looking lonely now that you had taken your jewelry and other various knick knacks off the wooden table.

you pick it up shakily, your fingers caressing the smooth frame. the picture of you and mark on your first date, a concert. he had a bottle of water in his hand and his arm was slung around you.

his smile haunted you now, the look of love in both of your eyes felt taunting. your heart hurt even more.

a part of you longed to stay. to give yourself to mark, because at the end of the day, he’d come home. home to you. whispering apologies and empty promises of a next time.

but you were tired. and you’ve tried. you tried to stay. you tried to love him even when you knew he didn’t love you anymore.

the soft click of your apartment door sends a painful ripple from your heart to the rest of your body.

you stand there for a moment, your eyes closed as you whisper your last wish into the dead of the night.

i wish you said you loved me, when you didn’t have your fingers crossed.

—

in your face writer’s block!!!! i’m finally back with a drabble and hopefully this pushes my writer’s block fully away >:((( shares & likes are appreciated! i love you all <333

wowowow user rnjfy posted wowowow this drabble is inspired by lauren spencer-smith’s song!! it’s really good and has me on my knees

fingers crossed — lmh.

in which he said he loved you but he must’ve had his fingers crossed.

—

the soft music rang throughout the fancy and definitely busy restaurant was a big contrast to the harsh pounding of your heart against your chest. the ice in your drink had melted—and the condensation had started to roll off the cool glass and onto the red cloth that lined your table.

“ma’am? if you’re not going to order anything, we’ll need to give up the table…” the assigned waitress looked at you with pity swirling in her eyes. this was the second time she’d approached you in the half hour you had sat and stared into nothing.

you could feel the embarassment creeping up your neck—but you swallowed it down as you smiled up at the young woman.

“sorry. you probably need the table… i’ll take my leave then.” after briefly bowing to apologize for any inconvenience, you wrapped your cardigan tighter around your shoulders as the cold wind greeted you.

you [7:16]: i’m at our table! the food looks really good, come soon! xx

no response. you wondered why you hoped for anything different, when all he seemed to be doing with you now is tolerating your presence. you terribly missed your boyfriend, but with how tonight was going you weren’t really sure how to feel.

the jingle of your keys sounded terribly loud as it echoed through you and your boyfriend’s empty apartment. you noticed the spot on your shoe rack where mark’s shoes were supposed to be—empty.

“as usual,” you mutter to no one in particular. the word ‘empty’ seemed to start to become a constant in your life.

your feet felt sore as you placed your keys in the small bowl you two had set up by the door.

“you suck at pottery.”

mark’s loud laugh surrounded the two of you as he struggled with the clay in his hands.

“dude! it’s crumbli—folding? what the hell!” he giggles as he tries to perfect the small bowl. your eyes lingered on his dark hair, his bangs falling slightly over his eyes.

“you suck at pottery.” you confirmed with a small nod, smiling at him as he rolls his eyes—a small smile curling at the edge of his lips.

“it’s just a unique bowl!”

your heart felt constricted in your chest. the small homey apartment that you two shared used to be close to what you would call your sanctuary.

now, you feel so so suffocated by the memories that would wash over you as you glanced over the decorations, furniture, artwork and other things that were scattered across your living space.

you walked slowly. the realization of what you need to do sinking in. your gaze catches the small couch that you both paid for.

“what d’you wanna watch?”

mark curls his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest as he flicks through the movies and shows netflix had to offer. you could hear his heartbeat going a mile a minute, but you leave your focus on the tv sat across from the two of you.

“what about friends?”

laughing loudly, mark quickly scrolls back up to the ‘watch again’ portion and clicks on the series you desperately loved.

burying his nose into your hair, “how are you not tired of this show?”

he giggles softly, the sound of the laugh track blending in with the silence of your apartment.

gulping down the memory, you start towards your shared bedroom. the sight of mark’s favorite guitar sitting next to your bed makes you uncomfortable, the tears in your shaky eyes seemed to be endless.

“y/n! c’mere. i wrote a song and uh… i wanted you to hear it, if that’s okay?”

the blush on mark’s face was something burned into your head. it was the most adorable sight and you never wanted to forget.

you nod, your hair bouncing at your shoulders as you sit next to him, watching as he clears his throat and fixes his fingers on the neck of his guitar.

his rough voice surrounds both your figures. the chords and the words—all of them blended so well together. they screamed mark, and you felt like you were falling in love all over again.

your movements felt robotic. you barely processed that your closet was now empty. mark’s clothes hung on their own, taking up only half of the large closet that occupied the left-hand side of your room.

the shine of your framed picture catches your gaze—it sat on your bedside table looking lonely now that you had taken your jewelry and other various knick knacks off the wooden table.

you pick it up shakily, your fingers caressing the smooth frame. the picture of you and mark on your first date, a concert. he had a bottle of water in his hand and his arm was slung around you.

his smile haunted you now, the look of love in both of your eyes felt taunting. your heart hurt even more.

a part of you longed to stay. to give yourself to mark, because at the end of the day, he’d come home. home to you. whispering apologies and empty promises of a next time.

but you were tired. and you’ve tried. you tried to stay. you tried to love him even when you knew he didn’t love you anymore.

the soft click of your apartment door sends a painful ripple from your heart to the rest of your body.

you stand there for a moment, your eyes closed as you whisper your last wish into the dead of the night.

i wish you said you loved me, when you didn’t have your fingers crossed.

—

in your face writer’s block!!!! i’m finally back with a drabble and hopefully this pushes my writer’s block fully away >:((( shares & likes are appreciated! i love you all <333

wowowow user rnjfy posted wowowow this drabble is inspired by lauren spencer-smith’s song!! it’s really good and has me on my knees

fingers crossed — lmh.

in which he said he loved you but he must’ve had his fingers crossed.

—

the soft music rang throughout the fancy and definitely busy restaurant was a big contrast to the harsh pounding of your heart against your chest. the ice in your drink had melted—and the condensation had started to roll off the cool glass and onto the red cloth that lined your table.

“ma’am? if you’re not going to order anything, we’ll need to give up the table…” the assigned waitress looked at you with pity swirling in her eyes. this was the second time she’d approached you in the half hour you had sat and stared into nothing.

you could feel the embarassment creeping up your neck—but you swallowed it down as you smiled up at the young woman.

“sorry. you probably need the table… i’ll take my leave then.” after briefly bowing to apologize for any inconvenience, you wrapped your cardigan tighter around your shoulders as the cold wind greeted you.

you [7:16]: i’m at our table! the food looks really good, come soon! xx

no response. you wondered why you hoped for anything different, when all he seemed to be doing with you now is tolerating your presence. you terribly missed your boyfriend, but with how tonight was going you weren’t really sure how to feel.

the jingle of your keys sounded terribly loud as it echoed through you and your boyfriend’s empty apartment. you noticed the spot on your shoe rack where mark’s shoes were supposed to be—empty.

“as usual,” you mutter to no one in particular. the word ‘empty’ seemed to start to become a constant in your life.

your feet felt sore as you placed your keys in the small bowl you two had set up by the door.

“you suck at pottery.”

mark’s loud laugh surrounded the two of you as he struggled with the clay in his hands.

“dude! it’s crumbli—folding? what the hell!” he giggles as he tries to perfect the small bowl. your eyes lingered on his dark hair, his bangs falling slightly over his eyes.

“you suck at pottery.” you confirmed with a small nod, smiling at him as he rolls his eyes—a small smile curling at the edge of his lips.

“it’s just a unique bowl!”

your heart felt constricted in your chest. the small homey apartment that you two shared used to be close to what you would call your sanctuary.

now, you feel so so suffocated by the memories that would wash over you as you glanced over the decorations, furniture, artwork and other things that were scattered across your living space.

you walked slowly. the realization of what you need to do sinking in. your gaze catches the small couch that you both paid for.

“what d’you wanna watch?”

mark curls his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest as he flicks through the movies and shows netflix had to offer. you could hear his heartbeat going a mile a minute, but you leave your focus on the tv sat across from the two of you.

“what about friends?”

laughing loudly, mark quickly scrolls back up to the ‘watch again’ portion and clicks on the series you desperately loved.

burying his nose into your hair, “how are you not tired of this show?”

he giggles softly, the sound of the laugh track blending in with the silence of your apartment.

gulping down the memory, you start towards your shared bedroom. the sight of mark’s favorite guitar sitting next to your bed makes you uncomfortable, the tears in your shaky eyes seemed to be endless.

“y/n! c’mere. i wrote a song and uh… i wanted you to hear it, if that’s okay?”

the blush on mark’s face was something burned into your head. it was the most adorable sight and you never wanted to forget.

you nod, your hair bouncing at your shoulders as you sit next to him, watching as he clears his throat and fixes his fingers on the neck of his guitar.

his rough voice surrounds both your figures. the chords and the words—all of them blended so well together. they screamed mark, and you felt like you were falling in love all over again.

your movements felt robotic. you barely processed that your closet was now empty. mark’s clothes hung on their own, taking up only half of the large closet that occupied the left-hand side of your room.

the shine of your framed picture catches your gaze—it sat on your bedside table looking lonely now that you had taken your jewelry and other various knick knacks off the wooden table.

you pick it up shakily, your fingers caressing the smooth frame. the picture of you and mark on your first date, a concert. he had a bottle of water in his hand and his arm was slung around you.

his smile haunted you now, the look of love in both of your eyes felt taunting. your heart hurt even more.

a part of you longed to stay. to give yourself to mark, because at the end of the day, he’d come home. home to you. whispering apologies and empty promises of a next time.

but you were tired. and you’ve tried. you tried to stay. you tried to love him even when you knew he didn’t love you anymore.

the soft click of your apartment door sends a painful ripple from your heart to the rest of your body.

you stand there for a moment, your eyes closed as you whisper your last wish into the dead of the night.

i wish you said you loved me, when you didn’t have your fingers crossed.

—

in your face writer’s block!!!! i’m finally back with a drabble and hopefully this pushes my writer’s block fully away >:((( shares & likes are appreciated! i love you all <333

wowowow user rnjfy posted wowowow this drabble is inspired by lauren spencer-smith’s song!! it’s really good and has me on my knees

fingers crossed — lmh.

in which he said he loved you but he must’ve had his fingers crossed.

—

the soft music rang throughout the fancy and definitely busy restaurant was a big contrast to the harsh pounding of your heart against your chest. the ice in your drink had melted—and the condensation had started to roll off the cool glass and onto the red cloth that lined your table.

“ma’am? if you’re not going to order anything, we’ll need to give up the table…” the assigned waitress looked at you with pity swirling in her eyes. this was the second time she’d approached you in the half hour you had sat and stared into nothing.

you could feel the embarassment creeping up your neck—but you swallowed it down as you smiled up at the young woman.

“sorry. you probably need the table… i’ll take my leave then.” after briefly bowing to apologize for any inconvenience, you wrapped your cardigan tighter around your shoulders as the cold wind greeted you.

you [7:16]: i’m at our table! the food looks really good, come soon! xx

no response. you wondered why you hoped for anything different, when all he seemed to be doing with you now is tolerating your presence. you terribly missed your boyfriend, but with how tonight was going you weren’t really sure how to feel.

the jingle of your keys sounded terribly loud as it echoed through you and your boyfriend’s empty apartment. you noticed the spot on your shoe rack where mark’s shoes were supposed to be—empty.

“as usual,” you mutter to no one in particular. the word ‘empty’ seemed to start to become a constant in your life.

your feet felt sore as you placed your keys in the small bowl you two had set up by the door.

“you suck at pottery.”

mark’s loud laugh surrounded the two of you as he struggled with the clay in his hands.

“dude! it’s crumbli—folding? what the hell!” he giggles as he tries to perfect the small bowl. your eyes lingered on his dark hair, his bangs falling slightly over his eyes.

“you suck at pottery.” you confirmed with a small nod, smiling at him as he rolls his eyes—a small smile curling at the edge of his lips.

“it’s just a unique bowl!”

your heart felt constricted in your chest. the small homey apartment that you two shared used to be close to what you would call your sanctuary.

now, you feel so so suffocated by the memories that would wash over you as you glanced over the decorations, furniture, artwork and other things that were scattered across your living space.

you walked slowly. the realization of what you need to do sinking in. your gaze catches the small couch that you both paid for.

“what d’you wanna watch?”

mark curls his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest as he flicks through the movies and shows netflix had to offer. you could hear his heartbeat going a mile a minute, but you leave your focus on the tv sat across from the two of you.

“what about friends?”

laughing loudly, mark quickly scrolls back up to the ‘watch again’ portion and clicks on the series you desperately loved.

burying his nose into your hair, “how are you not tired of this show?”

he giggles softly, the sound of the laugh track blending in with the silence of your apartment.

gulping down the memory, you start towards your shared bedroom. the sight of mark’s favorite guitar sitting next to your bed makes you uncomfortable, the tears in your shaky eyes seemed to be endless.

“y/n! c’mere. i wrote a song and uh… i wanted you to hear it, if that’s okay?”

the blush on mark’s face was something burned into your head. it was the most adorable sight and you never wanted to forget.

you nod, your hair bouncing at your shoulders as you sit next to him, watching as he clears his throat and fixes his fingers on the neck of his guitar.

his rough voice surrounds both your figures. the chords and the words—all of them blended so well together. they screamed mark, and you felt like you were falling in love all over again.

your movements felt robotic. you barely processed that your closet was now empty. mark’s clothes hung on their own, taking up only half of the large closet that occupied the left-hand side of your room.

the shine of your framed picture catches your gaze—it sat on your bedside table looking lonely now that you had taken your jewelry and other various knick knacks off the wooden table.

you pick it up shakily, your fingers caressing the smooth frame. the picture of you and mark on your first date, a concert. he had a bottle of water in his hand and his arm was slung around you.

his smile haunted you now, the look of love in both of your eyes felt taunting. your heart hurt even more.

a part of you longed to stay. to give yourself to mark, because at the end of the day, he’d come home. home to you. whispering apologies and empty promises of a next time.

but you were tired. and you’ve tried. you tried to stay. you tried to love him even when you knew he didn’t love you anymore.

the soft click of your apartment door sends a painful ripple from your heart to the rest of your body.

you stand there for a moment, your eyes closed as you whisper your last wish into the dead of the night.

i wish you said you loved me, when you didn’t have your fingers crossed.

—

in your face writer’s block!!!! i’m finally back with a drabble and hopefully this pushes my writer’s block fully away >:((( shares & likes are appreciated! i love you all <333

Spring Sorrows

Pairing: Mark Lee x Reader 

Genre: Romance, first love, fluff, non-idol au 

Word count: 552 words

A/N: I don’t even write sentimental stuff like this fjhkdghjkhaf. But this is what happens when I listen to sad gurl music. I am such a hopeless romantic but I rarely write the sappy kind of stories one would expect of me lol. But umm yeahhhh. Mark. And I wrote this in y/n format too so it’s a little special because I mainly write original characters. But enough from me! Enjoy this little piece of writing I cooked up while listening to my sad girl music playlist and please feel free to like, reblog, follow, and comment! <3

“I often think about how life would be if me and you worked out.” Mark was lying by your side, in the grass on a warm spring day. His face stayed glued to the clouds as he spoke of his most pleasant daydreams. The silver rims of his glasses gleamed as he adjusted his glasses on the bridge of his nose.

“We’d probably have about five kids by now because I can only imagine how much I’d fall in love with the children that a person as beautiful as you would produce.” He stopped to chuckle and brushed his nose. His side smile remained plastered on his face, even when he spoke again.

“I think about how you and I would’ve made the perfect team. The perfect mix of romance and friendship. We’d trust each other enough to take on whatever life threw at us.” Mark closed his eyes, as you watched him try to regather his thoughts.

“I want you to know that you are the one that got away. Not a day goes by where you don’t freely prance inside my head. I’m afraid to lose you when I don’t even have you.”

He started to mindlessly play with the bracelet on his wrist as he continued. The rubber cheetah swinging back and forth. “I remember when I wrote that letter in the summer of 2019. God, that’s when I knew. Three entire pages of me expressing how much I missed you and how I was convinced God made you with me in mind.”

“Mark.” You said as you noticed his voice started to slightly break.

“Don’t worry. I won’t give you the waterworks. I still have my pride, you know.” Mark said with a small laugh. “But I don’t think that should get in the way of me being honest with the person I love the most.”

He then went silent and you heard him exhale. The air around the two of you growing more dense by the second.

“Thank you for accepting to see me. I felt like a madman, you see. And honestly, I still do. I am still holding on to hope that one day we could pick up where we left off. But in the back of my mind, I know the truth. I’ve already lost. Jaehyun did the one thing that I failed to do. He remembered to love and cherish you.”

“Mark, you didn’t have a choice.” You said to him, hoping he would change his perspective. His words were laced with melancholy and regret and you felt he was being too hard on himself for the paths chosen by the both of you.

“I always had a choice. I just made the wrong one.” Mark said, before standing to take his leave. “I promise this time I’ll leave you alone for good. I just wanted to spend my last day in the country in your presence. Hope you can understand…. Goodbye. Tell Jaehyun, I send my congratulations on the new baby.”

You nodded and smiled. “ Of course, Mark. You take care. And thank you for the memories.”

“No. Thank you.”  And with that, he walked off into the distance. You watched his retreating figure disappear as you pulled out your bracelet from your pocket, the rubber cheetah swinging back and forth.

Wants vs Needs [M]

Genre: ABO, Omegaverse, Smut, AU

Warnings: A lot of smut, unprotected sex, fingering, rough sex, Mark has some Dom qualities, 

Word Count: 2.7k

Pairing: Mark Lee x OC

A/N: Just was dealing with some Mark brainrot. Yeah. That’s about it mdfjkhlkashfd. I REALLY DO HATE THIS FOR ME. But please enjoy! Feel free to follow, like , reblog and chat with meee <3

“Lina? Is that short for something?” Mark asked in the stool next to the reserved woman. The entire bar was now filled with majority Alphas. Most of the omegas had already been swooped away by the determined alphas who showed up with one goal in mind.

“Yes. My actual name is Corolina. But it’s a lot of syllables.” Lina responded, shifting in her seat. Careful to not stare too hard at the man with the interesting hair. The very few cases in which an ashy green hair color made sense. His perfectly sculpted face could allow for anything.

“I see…So Lina.” Mark took another sip of his drink. “Where are you from? I know you’re not from here.”

“My roots are in the South. My pack moved out west two generations ago but we are typically homeschooled. So, yes. I am from here.” Lina was growing more and more aggravated. She suddenly remembered why she stayed home. Socializing after being homeschooled is really hard in a society where everything is so fucking communal. She was homeschooled and then immediately started working for the family business. Of course nobody knew who she was.

“I stand corrected.” Mark shrugged his shoulders but kept his attention on Lina. He was completely mesmerized. He smelled her as soon as she walked in and instantly knew.

“Oh and by the way” Mark added and leaned into her ear. “I can smell you. And by that I mean, I can smell your slick. When exactly were you going to tell me that you’re in heat? If I decided to walk away, you’d be free game.” He moved away from her ear and they both looked around at the numerous pairs of glowing red eyes on them.

Lina gulped and rubbed her temple. “You um… you don’t understand my situation.”  She said in a low voice.

“Help me understand then. In return I’ll tell you what I’m saving you from.” Mark licked his lips and looked at Lina with admiring eyes. But on his face, it read as flirtatious rather than shy.

“You see Jaehyun over there? He fucks like he’s in love but he won’t mate you. Then we have Taeyong, a lot of omegas like him because he gives them the chance to experience an alpha being submissive in bed but beware- he’s dangerously territorial.” Mark stopped and let his eyes skim across the bar again. “Oh and we have the ever so lovely Jaemin. He has a thing for omega tears. So you can only imagine what he’s like in bed.”

“Okay okay.” Lina said. “You win. Truth is. I’ve never been with an alpha.” She said, so embarrassed that she couldn’t look Mark in the eyes.

Mark set down his drink. He pursed his lips as his eyebrows creased and met in the middle. “How have you been spending your heats for all these years?”  

“Um well…” Lina started.

Mark’s eyes widened and he made a face to convey his disapproval. “Don’t tell me….don’t even say it. Humans?! You are a little crazy, you know…”

Lina covered her mouth with her free hand and said nothing. This was the reaction she expected. Although the humans and werewolves made a pact and lived in harmony for centuries, it was still considered taboo to be intimate with humans. Too many things to consider. The human females were very weak in comparison to alphas and also couldn’t handle carrying 4 or more pups during one pregnancy, let alone giving birth to them. The human males were very likely to become addicted to slick and would have to enroll into rehab and were also not quite as strong as even omegas. Same sex couples were not as severely scrutinized but they were still very rare.

Mark scoffed and continued on. “If I decide to….you know.” He paused. “You can’t let another human fuck you again or else it won’t end well for either of you. Understood?”

Lina quickly nodded her head gulped. Her mind was partially hazed by the overwhelming smell of matured alphas.

Mark stood up and thanked the bartender. “Take my hand and don’t make eye contact with anyone here.” He reached out to Lina and she grabbed his hand and they started making their way out of the bar while she kept her head down.

“No fair. I’m the one that called dibs.” An alpha said from their right. Mark ignored him and pushed his way out the door, Lina’s fingers still intertwined with his own.

Once they hit the cool air, a gust of wind blew right by the pair, bringing Mark’s scent right into Lina’s nose. She gasped as an absurd amount of slick exited from her entrance.

“Mark, I wet my pants!” She said mortified. “My pants are actually soaked.” Lina grabbed onto Mark’s arm as a plea for help.

“Oh right.” Mark said slowly. “You usually spend your heat with humans…So you don’t know how your body is supposed to react to real attraction.” He shook his head and removed her hands from his arm. Before Lina could complain, he simply scooped her into his arms. “My place or yours?” He said once her feet were off the ground.

“I’m only a block away.” Lina said into his chest. She then pointed to the left towards a building with lavender along the side.

Mark nodded and started walking. Lina could feel her sanity slipping from her as she inhaled his scent. “Mark…please. Please hurry.” She felt herself practically sink into his chest. Mark ignored her and chuckled to himself.

Within a few minutes, they were inside Lina’s building and Mark just followed her scent from that point on. “This is definitely your door.” Mark gently set her down in front of him but she didn’t move to open the door.

“Omega…” Mark said with a soft smile. He caressed Lina’s nose with his pointer finger while gazing at her features. “Open the door and let me do what your body wants me to do. You’re going to mess up the floor with your slick, if we stay out here any longer.”

Lina turned around and pressed her pointer finger onto the pad above the door handle. The door opened and Mark was on her before the door was fully shut. He backed her into the wall as he passionately kissed Lina. She felt a warm, strong hand underneath her shirt and started to frantically unbutton Mark’s jeans. He put his free hand over hers to stop her.

“I don’t remember telling you to undress me.” Mark clucked his tongue and took both of Lina’s wrists in one hand and put them above her head, trapping her between him and the wall.

“S-Sorry.” Lina breathed, her knees on the verge of giving out. “I just need it so bad.” She threw her head back as Mark let his thumb softly circle an overly sensitive bud.

“What do you need so badly? Hmmm?” Mark let his entire hand enclose the mound of flesh and squeezed gently. “Bet you didn’t even know that your body could produce this much slick.” Keeping eye contact with Lina, he then slid his hand down into her underwear.

“Fuck. Feels like I just put my hand in a lake.”

“Alpha, please.”

“Stop begging, Omega.” Mark joked but kissed Lina deeply. She moaned into the kiss as Mark quickly assumed dominance, pushing his tongue past Lina’s lips. The kissing paired with Mark’s fingers inside of her was enough to drive her mad. She started moving her hips resulting in Mark’s fingers sliding around while inside of her. She was desperate and was practically pleading for Mark to give her what she needed the most.

“So horny you’re fucking yourself on my fingers. This is so fucking sexy. I might do something crazy.” Mark muttered as he held still to let Lina continue to move her hips, in a trance and searching for a release. Mark groaned as he focused on the muscles contracted around his fingers as slick started to run down onto his hand. “Oh fuck.” He muttered and crashed his lips onto Lina’s once more.

This time he grew impatient and pulled out his fingers. “No wait-” Lina started to protest. “Shhhh.” Mark shushed her and without another word, he picked up the Omega and then he was on the move, looking for the bedroom. Once he picked up her scent coming from inside of a nearby door, he went in and laid Lina on the colossal bed. Wasting no time, he tore her jeans from her body. She let him undress her as she watched his muscles flex underneath his t-shirt.

“Such a pretty omega. Are you ready to let me take care of you?” He caressed Lina’s thighs and settled himself between her legs. There was still quite a bit of slick left on his fingers, so he simply sucked it off. He closed his eyes and groaned in satisfaction before throwing a smirk. Lina shuddered and tried to close her legs as more slick spilled out of her. “No, don’t hide yourself from me.” Mark spread her legs open and kissed her inner thigh. “Just stay like that.” He then got up and started undressing.

Lina waited patiently and before she knew it, Mark was back in between her legs. She caught a glimpse of his length, already leaking with precum. Mark smiled once he caught her looking. “Can’t wait ‘til you put it in your mouth..but maybe later.” He lined up his cock with her entrance, catching some slick along the way. “Right now all I can think about is stretching you out.” He said as he started to slowly push himself in.

Lina gasped and wrapped her arms around Mark’s neck, as his warm and hard length invaded her wall. He rested his head in the crook of her neck as he inhaled her scent, his cock only growing harder. “ Shit. Can’t wait to fill you up with cum.” A moan escaped Lina as Mark plunged deeper, slick coating his cock as he pulled out and pushed back in. “Feels so good. So wet for me.”

“Fuck me harder.” Lina moaned. “Please, Alpha. Pleaseee.” She threw her head back as Mark started thrusting with more force. Motivated by her scent, he brought his head back up and kissed Lina on the lips. She opened her eyes and caught a glimpse of Mark’s half lidded stare, glowing red peeking from his eyes as a low growl grumbled in his chest. Small red snips decorated his collarbone from where Lina had accidentally nipped him during their initial exchange. Too focused on satisfying her want for the Alpha, she forgot to practice caution with her sharp nails.

To Lina’s surprise, she moaned as more slick gushed out of her. Her entire being yearning for Mark. This was what she had been missing. The connection between an omega and alpha was indescribable. His scent had her reeling as she found herself rolling her hips to meet Mark’s thrust. “You like how it feels to be fucked by an Alpha?” He breathed. “How about you give me a show..”

Lina nodded but whined when Mark pulled out, not too pleased with the feeling of being empty. Mark laid next to Lina and she got on top of him, full torso on display as Mark reached up and started to massage a breast. “Give me everything you’ve got, baby. Don’t hold back. Milk my cock.”

Lina started to move off of Mark and wrapped both hands around his throbbing member when Mark stopped her.

“No. Not by using your mouth…or hands.” He said with a hand on her shoulder. “Sit on it.” He continued with a nod and wide eyes, making sure she understood.

“Oh.” Lina said.

“Oh.” Mark echoed with a smile.

Lina squatted above Mark and grabbed his throbbing member as his chest rose and fell, his need for heat and wetness only growing stronger. She slowly rubbed around her entrance and then finally lined it up with her heat. He groaned as she sank onto him. “Oh my..” Lina moaned as Mark’s cock twitched, a result of the slick running down his shaft.

“Why does it feel so big?” She asked, taking a break to try to regain her composure.

Mark laughed from underneath. “It feels good doesn’t it?” He beamed. “I usually don’t do this but….Let’s just say you’re special.”

“Lucky me.” Lina started to bounce on Mark and he let his eyes roll back as his breath hitched.

“Fuck. Don’t stop.” He said, sweat forming on his chest.

Lina cried out as she found her rhythm, Mark’s hand still on her breast as his mouth formed an “O” and his eyebrows furrowed as he tried his best to not cum.

“I feel so full, baby.” Lina panted quietly, her clit signaling more slick to make its exit.

“Oh my god.” Mark said as soon as he felt it. He quickly sat up and switched their positions so that he was on top. “Alright, that’s enough.” He put one of her legs on his shoulder and thrust into her- HARD.

Lina’s leg shook and she screamed in pleasure. The sensation rolled through her body as she gripped the sheets.

“You take it so well. Gonna make you addicted to this cock.” He said into her ear. “Ever wondered what it feels like to have an Alpha fill you up?”

Lina nodded quickly, grabbing his face. “Show me, Alpha.” She pleaded. “Cum inside me, please.”

Mark bit his lip and then smiled down at the omega. He then slid his hand in between the two of them and started to circle Lina’s clit. She moaned out in pleasure and Mark picked up the pace. Relentlessly pounding into Lina, Mark embraced her, stretching her leg even further back.

“I really want to feel you cum around my dick, Lina.” He said in a husky voice. This was enough to throw Lina off the edge. She felt it in the pit of her stomach and arched her back as she let the orgasm take its course.

“Oh, you’re so pretty.” Mark cooed in her ear. “I love having your pussy squeezing my cock. Keep going, baby. You did so well.” He talked to her as her face scrunched up in pure ecstasy, making sure she thought only of him as she experienced her release. He didn’t stop thrusting, still searching for his own climax.

“I’m so close.” His thrusts went deeper and a vein started protruding on his forehead.

“Mark.” Lina said, a little worried.

“Don’t distract me, please.” He said with a grunt. Then his body went rigid and he growled, lowering his head as he sprayed her walls with his cum. His body was slightly shaking and Lina cried out as she felt the warm liquid fill her up slowly. It was so much that it spilled out of her but Mark didn’t pull out, completely drained and dazed.

“Wow.” Lina said as she laid with Mark still inside of her. Mark propped himself on his two hands and looked down at Lina. Some strands of hair were matted onto his forehead and he had a cheeky smirk on his face. Lina couldn’t help but giggle. The smirk, paired with his prominent cheekbones made him look as if he’s just been caught doing something mischievous.

“You know.” Mark started. “It’s only day one.”

“Yes, it is.” Lina agreed with Mark, but wasn’t following.

“Come with me.” Mark said, searching Lina’s face for a response. “ You should be spending your heats with an Alpha. Preferably me.” He then pulled out and Lina moaned softly at the sudden feeling of emptiness.

“One condition.” Lina said, shooting up her pointer finger and stopped in front of Mark’s face.

Mark chuckled but decided to hear her out. “Name your price.”

“You have to knot me next time.”

“Okayyyy, let’s not get too ahead of ourselves.” Mark said with a small laugh. He then whispered into her ear. “You could barely handle me cumming in you and this measly fifteen minutes of sex.”

“I thought I did well!” Lina exclaimed.

“You did….but it was only one round. The standard is usually about three to four rounds….And you’re in heat.” Mark said quietly.

Lina looked at Mark in shock. “What?! I’m exhausted.”

“My point exactly.” Mark said with a laugh.

Wants vs Needs [M]

Genre: ABO, Omegaverse, Smut, AU

Warnings: A lot of smut, unprotected sex, fingering, rough sex, Mark has some Dom qualities, 

Word Count: 2.7k

Pairing: Mark Lee x OC

A/N: Just was dealing with some Mark brainrot. Yeah. That’s about it mdfjkhlkashfd. I REALLY DO HATE THIS FOR ME. But please enjoy! Feel free to follow, like , reblog and chat with meee <3

Keep reading

Set Me Free - Teaser

navi - m.list

Intern!Mark Lee x Female Mermaid!Reader

wc: not yet recorded

note: Hello, my lovelies! so here is the teaser for the Mark fic i am writing. it's severely unfinished and im still rusty and crusty with my writing lol. It's based on this fic idea i had. i don't have a current date for when it'll be finished but hopefully in the coming days.

ALSO, honestly feel free to send in asks about scenarios and my fic characters. for instance 'Can you imagine Quiet!Jeno chasing after Chenle for his comment?' And for some of them i may even write a lil drabble and others i'll probably just gush about it with u.

Reblogs are appreciated, and So is feedback whether it be bad or good.

Enjoy the teaser!

Mark hated his new summer job. 

The employees in the offices around him sure knew how to push his buttons. Sending Mark on a coffee run for them to then decide they miscounted. Making him fetch their lunch to then change their mind once he had already gotten to the deli. Mark had lost count of how much ‘overtime’ he had already done in just a week. He hadn’t had a single lunch break yet, opting to work through in any hope that he could leave early. Poor chance that was. SMLabatories were truly using Mark to their advantage. 

Today though, Mark had barely seen a soul. It was as if his floor was a ghost town. He hadn’t had any paperwork dropped on his desks, no task list in his email either. It was only when he caught sight of Wonshik leaving his office with a styrofoam box labeled ‘HAZARD’, did Mark finally learn the reason why. Wonshik looked surprised to spot Mark at the small desk in the corridor, realization dawning on his face soon after. 

“Ah, Mr.Lee. It’s a pretty big day for us, work wise, today. Our focus will be on the new subje- research project for the rest of the week - If you’ve not received a task list or anything to do, feel free to brush up on your studies.” And with that, he was gone quite quickly leaving Mark standing there with furrowed brows of confusion. 

That was the nicest he had been spoken to so far... Mark had also noted that Wonshik looked nervous, jittery, and stressed. Mark just brushed it off, leaning back in his office chair to squeeze his fingers into his pocket in search of his phone.  Teeth gnawed onto his bottom lip as he glanced at the time ‘12:34’. Lunchtime. Mark perked up, with no work... He could have lunch today. 

At that thought, he grabbed his satchel bag and slung it over his shoulder, locking the desktop and strolling down the hallway with a newfound happiness at the thought of food. Remembering where the canteen was was a feat of its own though. He was sure there was one on this floor, He just couldn't remember where. Even if he just found a secluded space to eat his sandwich and read his Deadpool comic, Mark would count that as a win. The visitor pass around his neck swung as he walked, trying different doors with no joy. Until he stumbled across a barely lit hallway. 

Mark had seen enough zombie movies to know that any corridor of a science facility that looks like this should be off limits. Still, he glanced over his shoulder for any one who may get him in trouble before turning the corner. He walked slow, footsteps a dull thud as he attempted to be as light on his feet as possible. All the doors so far were locked but Mark’s keen eye was drawn to the glowing hue emitting from a door at the end. It’s almost as if someone hadn’t fully closed the door behind them. 

He crept toward it, his index and middle finger gently pushing the door the rest of the way open. He didnt spot it at first, focused on closing the door behind him without any creaks, then being distracted by the different diagrams and formulas written on a whiteboard next to the door. 

Mark’s hearing heightened at the sudden sound of sloshing water. It was a gentle sound but it was enough for Mark to finally register that he wasnt alone.. That he felt like he was being studied. 

“You’re new.” A quiet, melodic voice called out into the silence. 

Mark was drawn to the sound, slowly turning around as if captivated. Though the colour drained from his face as he finally caught sight of the center piece of the room. 

“W-What the fuck?...” He choked, feet nearly stumbling over one another to press his back against the door. 

In the very center of the room sat a large rectangle tank filled with blue murky water, spilling over the edges as the occupant of the tank moved within it. Mark’s eyes were glued to the fiery orange fins and scales, as beautiful as they were, he had never seen such a thing. In place of legs, there was a thick tail with fins at the very end. The tones of orange and red complimented the person’s skin tone beautifully, shimmering in the water. Mark’s frightened, but curious, gaze drifted higher. Noting that the tail blended into a regular human torso, flawless, naked navel and he couldn’t fight the blush on his face at the white bikini top that covered you. It took him a while to register what he thought he was seeing… A..mermaid?

How You Love Him - Mark Lee x Reader

Navi - m.list

Hey anon! I feel like I veered off course with this a little but I hope you like it still! It's a little late but I've been very tired lately.

wc; 1,734

Warnings; Nothing much? this is a major fluff fest. smut, unprotected sex, they have a bath together. there's A LOT of kissing. it's poorly written so watch out, not proofread.

NSFW writings under the cut.

Mark was exhausted. He just wanted to go home. Not his home though. your home. you. you are his home. It was a rare occurrence to spend time in his own bed nowadays.

So, as soon as he slid your spare key into the lock a sense of peace overcame him. It was as if all the day's aches and worries ebbed away slightly. Not completely, Mark could tell that one as soon as he let his bag fall from his shoulder, a puff of air leaving his lips. He could feel it in his back. His knees. Shoulders, even.

"Mark? Is that you?" His heart squeezed at the sound of your voice, the left side of his lips twitching to a smile as he saw you approach.

"Sorry, did I wake you? I kept dropping the keys outside the do-" His words were cut off when he saw you drop to your knees.

His hand automatically went down to run his hand over your hair. He watched you untie his shoelaces, a hand gently tapping at his calf as a prompt for him to lift his foot.

One by one, you wordlessly removed his shoes and socks. He chuckled weakly as you scrunched your nose at the odour. As you stood, his palms cupped your elbows to steady you.

"You look like you need a little __ special TLC." You hummed softly, reaching upon your tiptoes to press a welcoming kiss to his slightly chapped lips.

Mark let you tug him by the sleeve of his hoodie. His eyebrows pinching I wonder when you didn't pull him into your bedroom but the bathroom instead.

"I love you more than words, but you stink…" He didn’t respond and that was okay by you. You reached up to remove his glasses from his face, folding in the arms and setting them next to the sink.

Mark let you help him undress and even when you prompted him to sit on the closed toilet lid, he still watched you. He observed as you started filling the tub with warm water, reaching for the lavender bath salts and oils. He winced as you helped him settle his sore body into the calming water, his head leaning back against the tub with a sigh. Mark finally relaxed, letting the scented oils draw the tension from his body. He could vaguely hear the sound of you striking a match to light your candles. But then, he heard nothing. Mark waited but he still heard nothing, until the soothing sounds of an instrumental peace filling the silence. Mark slid further into the water until it lapped at his shoulders. Utter bliss. His mind completely relaxed, the exhaustion of the day not a single worry in his mind. Like a floating sensation… his eyes closing for just a se-

“I wouldn’t go to sleep yet, Markie.” His left eye cracked open, was he sleeping?

Mark observed you as you tugged his shirt over your head. He loved how comfortable you were around him. At first, you’d have made him turn away or close his eyes as you undressed. But now, you let his loving gaze bestow upon you, his gaze caught onto his favourite freckle. It was in such an odd place but it was one of his favourite things. He had placed many of pecks to that very mark. Mark was fascinated by you. Even as you put the both of your clothes in the hamper, he couldn’t help but release a dreamy sigh. If this were a cartoon, Mark would have heart eyes for pupils.

He didn’t move as you approached the bath, expecting you to sit between his legs. However, when you just stood there, his eyebrow quirked in question. “Sit forward,” You murmured, waiting for him to do so.

Mark grimaced as he moved his limbs to shuffle forward, gladly settling back once you were nestled behind him with your legs stretched out either side of his own. If Mark felt like he was at peak relaxation before, that was nothing compared to how he felt now, embraced against your torso with the warmth of your skin against his own. Home. Mark was home.

If there was one thing Mark was certain of, it was that you love him. You proved it everyday in everything you did for him. From getting up with him at ridiculous times just to prepare him a breakfast whilst he showered so he would have time to eat before he left, to the silly little things you do for him like all of his laundry and cleaning his mess. Mark’s a messy man and he knows that for sure. Mark knows you love him. He knows because you never complain when he has to cancel plans or move date nights. You’ve never said a thing about not being able to show affection in public, you embrace him as he is even with his disadvantages. Mark doesn’t think anyone has ever or even could ever love him as much as you do. Mark found his person.

It almost made him emotional to think about, his hand catching around yours to pause your swipe of the wash cloth over his torso. He tentatively lifted your fingers to his lips, pressing a kiss on your ring finger. A silent promise. One day.

You let your chin settle on his shoulder, enjoying the affectionate pecks Mark laced over your fingers and up your wrist. With your hand occupied, you let the other run over his chest. He glistened with the shine of water over his torso. You rained your own kisses on his shoulder, letting your legs wind round him. It was moments like these that you both enjoyed. Mark didn’t have to live up to any expectations, he had no worries or cares and the same for you. You just had each other.

His adoration for you grew with everything you did. How you massaged his head when you washed his hair, how you dried his body and hair after the bath, how you massaged his calf muscles so he wouldn't cramp up in the night, How you applied his skin care and put the spot patches over his chin and forehead.

Mark propped himself against your pillow, watching you get ready for bed yourself. His lips quirked when you began to hum a tune whilst applying moisturiser. Mark knew the song. It was his. Mark wasn’t just hard because you were naked. Mark was hard thinking about just you. He didn’t mean to, it felt like such an odd reason for him to get hard but it made sense. Mark tugged the covers up to his shoulders, fighting a grin as you automatically pulled on one if his oversized t-shirts. He felt so giddy when you crawled into bed next to him. Your point of destination being his arms. He rolled onto his side as you flicked off the lamp light. Mark could still see you, you’d taken to leaving a small plug in glow light on whenever he stayed because Mark always kicked the furniture during the night when he gets up half asleep.

Mark had barely said much to you since he had arrived but he felt like you got it. You never prompted him. So, when you rolled onto your side to face him too, Mark cupped your cheek. His brown eyes flickered back and forth to yours almost trying to convey an unspoken message.

“I love you too, Markie.” Just like that. You got it, shuffling closer to press you both front to front.

When Mark kissed you it wasn’t rushed. It was slow, lazy. The remnants of minty fresh toothpaste whispering at your taste buds. This wasn’t a goodnight kiss. His thumb smoothing over your cheek bone as the warm palm of his hand cradled your face to his own. Your own hands had curled the grey fabric of his pyjama top amongst your fingers as you kissed him back.

“Mark-” You were hushed by another capture of his mouth on yours, your lips being willingly pried open in a caress of tongues.

His other hand had begun to wander, sculpting over your body by memory. Mark’s index finger circled around the freckle that he adored so much before he was tugging you flush against him by your hip. You could feel him against you and even better when Mark pulled at your thigh to hook around his own hip.

It was a bit awkward to shuffle his pyjama pants down enough to free him without breaking the marriage of your mouths but it was manageable. You heatedly sighed into his mouth when his fingers tugged your panties aside. Nothing happened for a few minutes, just the two of you locked in a loving hold. The sounds of your kisses filing the silence.

Though when you felt a thick, warm prod at your entrance, your hips naturally cantered to welcome him. Mark’s raspy groan vibrating through your tongue. Honestly, Mark would have been quite content to stay like this all night. Locked mouths, flush against each other and fully seated and stilled in your wet heat. You had other ideas, clearly. Your hips moving in a slow grind, around and around, back and forth. The sensation had him breaking away from your mouth to hide his head in your neck. The onslaught of his mouth didn’t stop though, his delicate kisses ghosting over every inch of skin his mouth could reach.

“____.” His call of your name accompanied the way his fingers dug into your hips to guide your movements.

Nothing was rushed, the lazy, guided swirl of your hips just the slow pace you both needed. It was sensual, slowly building in the pit of your core. The position made it all the more intense, you both on your sides facing each other with your leg hooked over his hip. It felt so… deep. You could feel the swirling of pleasure consume you. Mark wasn’t much better himself, soft sighs and quiet moans muffled by the skin of your neck.

You reached a mutual peak, Mark’s head lifting from your neck to rest his forehead against your own. A croaky moan of your name pulling from him as your movements stuttered.

“Love you, so much.” He whispered, his eyes never leaving your own. “You’re my person.”

©acescavern - Please do not copy, repost, or translate my works. Reblogging is allowed

How You Love Him - Mark Lee x Reader

Navi - m.list

Hey anon! I feel like I veered off course with this a little but I hope you like it still! It's a little late but I've been very tired lately.

wc; 1,734

Warnings; Nothing much? this is a major fluff fest. smut, unprotected sex, they have a bath together. there's A LOT of kissing. it's poorly written so watch out, not proofread.

NSFW writings under the cut.

Mark was exhausted. He just wanted to go home. Not his home though. your home. you. you are his home. It was a rare occurrence to spend time in his own bed nowadays.

So, as soon as he slid your spare key into the lock a sense of peace overcame him. It was as if all the day's aches and worries ebbed away slightly. Not completely, Mark could tell that one as soon as he let his bag fall from his shoulder, a puff of air leaving his lips. He could feel it in his back. His knees. Shoulders, even.

"Mark? Is that you?" His heart squeezed at the sound of your voice, the left side of his lips twitching to a smile as he saw you approach.

"Sorry, did I wake you? I kept dropping the keys outside the do-" His words were cut off when he saw you drop to your knees.

His hand automatically went down to run his hand over your hair. He watched you untie his shoelaces, a hand gently tapping at his calf as a prompt for him to lift his foot.

One by one, you wordlessly removed his shoes and socks. He chuckled weakly as you scrunched your nose at the odour. As you stood, his palms cupped your elbows to steady you.

"You look like you need a little __ special TLC." You hummed softly, reaching upon your tiptoes to press a welcoming kiss to his slightly chapped lips.

Mark let you tug him by the sleeve of his hoodie. His eyebrows pinching I wonder when you didn't pull him into your bedroom but the bathroom instead.

"I love you more than words, but you stink…" He didn’t respond and that was okay by you. You reached up to remove his glasses from his face, folding in the arms and setting them next to the sink.

Mark let you help him undress and even when you prompted him to sit on the closed toilet lid, he still watched you. He observed as you started filling the tub with warm water, reaching for the lavender bath salts and oils. He winced as you helped him settle his sore body into the calming water, his head leaning back against the tub with a sigh. Mark finally relaxed, letting the scented oils draw the tension from his body. He could vaguely hear the sound of you striking a match to light your candles. But then, he heard nothing. Mark waited but he still heard nothing, until the soothing sounds of an instrumental peace filling the silence. Mark slid further into the water until it lapped at his shoulders. Utter bliss. His mind completely relaxed, the exhaustion of the day not a single worry in his mind. Like a floating sensation… his eyes closing for just a se-

“I wouldn’t go to sleep yet, Markie.” His left eye cracked open, was he sleeping?

Mark observed you as you tugged his shirt over your head. He loved how comfortable you were around him. At first, you’d have made him turn away or close his eyes as you undressed. But now, you let his loving gaze bestow upon you, his gaze caught onto his favourite freckle. It was in such an odd place but it was one of his favourite things. He had placed many of pecks to that very mark. Mark was fascinated by you. Even as you put the both of your clothes in the hamper, he couldn’t help but release a dreamy sigh. If this were a cartoon, Mark would have heart eyes for pupils.

He didn’t move as you approached the bath, expecting you to sit between his legs. However, when you just stood there, his eyebrow quirked in question. “Sit forward,” You murmured, waiting for him to do so.

Mark grimaced as he moved his limbs to shuffle forward, gladly settling back once you were nestled behind him with your legs stretched out either side of his own. If Mark felt like he was at peak relaxation before, that was nothing compared to how he felt now, embraced against your torso with the warmth of your skin against his own. Home. Mark was home.

If there was one thing Mark was certain of, it was that you love him. You proved it everyday in everything you did for him. From getting up with him at ridiculous times just to prepare him a breakfast whilst he showered so he would have time to eat before he left, to the silly little things you do for him like all of his laundry and cleaning his mess. Mark’s a messy man and he knows that for sure. Mark knows you love him. He knows because you never complain when he has to cancel plans or move date nights. You’ve never said a thing about not being able to show affection in public, you embrace him as he is even with his disadvantages. Mark doesn’t think anyone has ever or even could ever love him as much as you do. Mark found his person.

It almost made him emotional to think about, his hand catching around yours to pause your swipe of the wash cloth over his torso. He tentatively lifted your fingers to his lips, pressing a kiss on your ring finger. A silent promise. One day.

You let your chin settle on his shoulder, enjoying the affectionate pecks Mark laced over your fingers and up your wrist. With your hand occupied, you let the other run over his chest. He glistened with the shine of water over his torso. You rained your own kisses on his shoulder, letting your legs wind round him. It was moments like these that you both enjoyed. Mark didn’t have to live up to any expectations, he had no worries or cares and the same for you. You just had each other.

His adoration for you grew with everything you did. How you massaged his head when you washed his hair, how you dried his body and hair after the bath, how you massaged his calf muscles so he wouldn't cramp up in the night, How you applied his skin care and put the spot patches over his chin and forehead.

Mark propped himself against your pillow, watching you get ready for bed yourself. His lips quirked when you began to hum a tune whilst applying moisturiser. Mark knew the song. It was his. Mark wasn’t just hard because you were naked. Mark was hard thinking about just you. He didn’t mean to, it felt like such an odd reason for him to get hard but it made sense. Mark tugged the covers up to his shoulders, fighting a grin as you automatically pulled on one if his oversized t-shirts. He felt so giddy when you crawled into bed next to him. Your point of destination being his arms. He rolled onto his side as you flicked off the lamp light. Mark could still see you, you’d taken to leaving a small plug in glow light on whenever he stayed because Mark always kicked the furniture during the night when he gets up half asleep.

Mark had barely said much to you since he had arrived but he felt like you got it. You never prompted him. So, when you rolled onto your side to face him too, Mark cupped your cheek. His brown eyes flickered back and forth to yours almost trying to convey an unspoken message.

“I love you too, Markie.” Just like that. You got it, shuffling closer to press you both front to front.

When Mark kissed you it wasn’t rushed. It was slow, lazy. The remnants of minty fresh toothpaste whispering at your taste buds. This wasn’t a goodnight kiss. His thumb smoothing over your cheek bone as the warm palm of his hand cradled your face to his own. Your own hands had curled the grey fabric of his pyjama top amongst your fingers as you kissed him back.

“Mark-” You were hushed by another capture of his mouth on yours, your lips being willingly pried open in a caress of tongues.

His other hand had begun to wander, sculpting over your body by memory. Mark’s index finger circled around the freckle that he adored so much before he was tugging you flush against him by your hip. You could feel him against you and even better when Mark pulled at your thigh to hook around his own hip.

It was a bit awkward to shuffle his pyjama pants down enough to free him without breaking the marriage of your mouths but it was manageable. You heatedly sighed into his mouth when his fingers tugged your panties aside. Nothing happened for a few minutes, just the two of you locked in a loving hold. The sounds of your kisses filing the silence.

Though when you felt a thick, warm prod at your entrance, your hips naturally cantered to welcome him. Mark’s raspy groan vibrating through your tongue. Honestly, Mark would have been quite content to stay like this all night. Locked mouths, flush against each other and fully seated and stilled in your wet heat. You had other ideas, clearly. Your hips moving in a slow grind, around and around, back and forth. The sensation had him breaking away from your mouth to hide his head in your neck. The onslaught of his mouth didn’t stop though, his delicate kisses ghosting over every inch of skin his mouth could reach.

“____.” His call of your name accompanied the way his fingers dug into your hips to guide your movements.

Nothing was rushed, the lazy, guided swirl of your hips just the slow pace you both needed. It was sensual, slowly building in the pit of your core. The position made it all the more intense, you both on your sides facing each other with your leg hooked over his hip. It felt so… deep. You could feel the swirling of pleasure consume you. Mark wasn’t much better himself, soft sighs and quiet moans muffled by the skin of your neck.

You reached a mutual peak, Mark’s head lifting from your neck to rest his forehead against your own. A croaky moan of your name pulling from him as your movements stuttered.

“Love you, so much.” He whispered, his eyes never leaving your own. “You’re my person.”

©acescavern - Please do not copy, repost, or translate my works. Reblogging is allowed

How You Love Him - Mark Lee x Reader

Navi - m.list

Hey anon! I feel like I veered off course with this a little but I hope you like it still! It's a little late but I've been very tired lately.

wc; 1,734

Warnings; Nothing much? this is a major fluff fest. smut, unprotected sex, they have a bath together. there's A LOT of kissing. it's poorly written so watch out, not proofread.

NSFW writings under the cut.

Mark was exhausted. He just wanted to go home. Not his home though. your home. you. you are his home. It was a rare occurrence to spend time in his own bed nowadays.

So, as soon as he slid your spare key into the lock a sense of peace overcame him. It was as if all the day's aches and worries ebbed away slightly. Not completely, Mark could tell that one as soon as he let his bag fall from his shoulder, a puff of air leaving his lips. He could feel it in his back. His knees. Shoulders, even.

"Mark? Is that you?" His heart squeezed at the sound of your voice, the left side of his lips twitching to a smile as he saw you approach.

"Sorry, did I wake you? I kept dropping the keys outside the do-" His words were cut off when he saw you drop to your knees.

His hand automatically went down to run his hand over your hair. He watched you untie his shoelaces, a hand gently tapping at his calf as a prompt for him to lift his foot.

One by one, you wordlessly removed his shoes and socks. He chuckled weakly as you scrunched your nose at the odour. As you stood, his palms cupped your elbows to steady you.

"You look like you need a little __ special TLC." You hummed softly, reaching upon your tiptoes to press a welcoming kiss to his slightly chapped lips.

Mark let you tug him by the sleeve of his hoodie. His eyebrows pinching I wonder when you didn't pull him into your bedroom but the bathroom instead.

"I love you more than words, but you stink…" He didn’t respond and that was okay by you. You reached up to remove his glasses from his face, folding in the arms and setting them next to the sink.

Mark let you help him undress and even when you prompted him to sit on the closed toilet lid, he still watched you. He observed as you started filling the tub with warm water, reaching for the lavender bath salts and oils. He winced as you helped him settle his sore body into the calming water, his head leaning back against the tub with a sigh. Mark finally relaxed, letting the scented oils draw the tension from his body. He could vaguely hear the sound of you striking a match to light your candles. But then, he heard nothing. Mark waited but he still heard nothing, until the soothing sounds of an instrumental peace filling the silence. Mark slid further into the water until it lapped at his shoulders. Utter bliss. His mind completely relaxed, the exhaustion of the day not a single worry in his mind. Like a floating sensation… his eyes closing for just a se-

“I wouldn’t go to sleep yet, Markie.” His left eye cracked open, was he sleeping?

Mark observed you as you tugged his shirt over your head. He loved how comfortable you were around him. At first, you’d have made him turn away or close his eyes as you undressed. But now, you let his loving gaze bestow upon you, his gaze caught onto his favourite freckle. It was in such an odd place but it was one of his favourite things. He had placed many of pecks to that very mark. Mark was fascinated by you. Even as you put the both of your clothes in the hamper, he couldn’t help but release a dreamy sigh. If this were a cartoon, Mark would have heart eyes for pupils.

He didn’t move as you approached the bath, expecting you to sit between his legs. However, when you just stood there, his eyebrow quirked in question. “Sit forward,” You murmured, waiting for him to do so.

Mark grimaced as he moved his limbs to shuffle forward, gladly settling back once you were nestled behind him with your legs stretched out either side of his own. If Mark felt like he was at peak relaxation before, that was nothing compared to how he felt now, embraced against your torso with the warmth of your skin against his own. Home. Mark was home.

If there was one thing Mark was certain of, it was that you love him. You proved it everyday in everything you did for him. From getting up with him at ridiculous times just to prepare him a breakfast whilst he showered so he would have time to eat before he left, to the silly little things you do for him like all of his laundry and cleaning his mess. Mark’s a messy man and he knows that for sure. Mark knows you love him. He knows because you never complain when he has to cancel plans or move date nights. You’ve never said a thing about not being able to show affection in public, you embrace him as he is even with his disadvantages. Mark doesn’t think anyone has ever or even could ever love him as much as you do. Mark found his person.

It almost made him emotional to think about, his hand catching around yours to pause your swipe of the wash cloth over his torso. He tentatively lifted your fingers to his lips, pressing a kiss on your ring finger. A silent promise. One day.

You let your chin settle on his shoulder, enjoying the affectionate pecks Mark laced over your fingers and up your wrist. With your hand occupied, you let the other run over his chest. He glistened with the shine of water over his torso. You rained your own kisses on his shoulder, letting your legs wind round him. It was moments like these that you both enjoyed. Mark didn’t have to live up to any expectations, he had no worries or cares and the same for you. You just had each other.

His adoration for you grew with everything you did. How you massaged his head when you washed his hair, how you dried his body and hair after the bath, how you massaged his calf muscles so he wouldn't cramp up in the night, How you applied his skin care and put the spot patches over his chin and forehead.

Mark propped himself against your pillow, watching you get ready for bed yourself. His lips quirked when you began to hum a tune whilst applying moisturiser. Mark knew the song. It was his. Mark wasn’t just hard because you were naked. Mark was hard thinking about just you. He didn’t mean to, it felt like such an odd reason for him to get hard but it made sense. Mark tugged the covers up to his shoulders, fighting a grin as you automatically pulled on one if his oversized t-shirts. He felt so giddy when you crawled into bed next to him. Your point of destination being his arms. He rolled onto his side as you flicked off the lamp light. Mark could still see you, you’d taken to leaving a small plug in glow light on whenever he stayed because Mark always kicked the furniture during the night when he gets up half asleep.

Mark had barely said much to you since he had arrived but he felt like you got it. You never prompted him. So, when you rolled onto your side to face him too, Mark cupped your cheek. His brown eyes flickered back and forth to yours almost trying to convey an unspoken message.

“I love you too, Markie.” Just like that. You got it, shuffling closer to press you both front to front.

When Mark kissed you it wasn’t rushed. It was slow, lazy. The remnants of minty fresh toothpaste whispering at your taste buds. This wasn’t a goodnight kiss. His thumb smoothing over your cheek bone as the warm palm of his hand cradled your face to his own. Your own hands had curled the grey fabric of his pyjama top amongst your fingers as you kissed him back.

“Mark-” You were hushed by another capture of his mouth on yours, your lips being willingly pried open in a caress of tongues.

His other hand had begun to wander, sculpting over your body by memory. Mark’s index finger circled around the freckle that he adored so much before he was tugging you flush against him by your hip. You could feel him against you and even better when Mark pulled at your thigh to hook around his own hip.

It was a bit awkward to shuffle his pyjama pants down enough to free him without breaking the marriage of your mouths but it was manageable. You heatedly sighed into his mouth when his fingers tugged your panties aside. Nothing happened for a few minutes, just the two of you locked in a loving hold. The sounds of your kisses filing the silence.

Though when you felt a thick, warm prod at your entrance, your hips naturally cantered to welcome him. Mark’s raspy groan vibrating through your tongue. Honestly, Mark would have been quite content to stay like this all night. Locked mouths, flush against each other and fully seated and stilled in your wet heat. You had other ideas, clearly. Your hips moving in a slow grind, around and around, back and forth. The sensation had him breaking away from your mouth to hide his head in your neck. The onslaught of his mouth didn’t stop though, his delicate kisses ghosting over every inch of skin his mouth could reach.

“____.” His call of your name accompanied the way his fingers dug into your hips to guide your movements.

Nothing was rushed, the lazy, guided swirl of your hips just the slow pace you both needed. It was sensual, slowly building in the pit of your core. The position made it all the more intense, you both on your sides facing each other with your leg hooked over his hip. It felt so… deep. You could feel the swirling of pleasure consume you. Mark wasn’t much better himself, soft sighs and quiet moans muffled by the skin of your neck.

You reached a mutual peak, Mark’s head lifting from your neck to rest his forehead against your own. A croaky moan of your name pulling from him as your movements stuttered.

“Love you, so much.” He whispered, his eyes never leaving your own. “You’re my person.”

©acescavern - Please do not copy, repost, or translate my works. Reblogging is allowed

Housemates (Mark)

Before I share another serious post, I’m introducing this short series of NCT members (particularly my biases) as Essie’s housemates. Like most of my writing, this is going to be fluffy and hilarious if you believe it to be. 

Fun fact is, Mark’s the first NCT member I wrote a story about. Should I post that here? Let me know! After all, I liked him in Super M first. Not that I don’t love the group anymore, but I am more in love with NCT than any other group now. 

Without further ado, please enjoy this feel-good piece and this adorable GIF of him!

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :) 

–––

Summary: I was inspired to write this because of this Instagram post. Most of the scenes here, and for the rest that will follow, are based on these scenarios. 

POV: 2nd person since this was written last year. 

Word count: 1,700 + words

Warning: Aside from the fluff, maybe there’s a teeny bit of angst with Johnny not relating to them. That’s about it! 

–––

Since you moved in with Johnny and Mark, your life has never been more exciting. Sure, living with Nini was nice and all, but there were more challenges living with two guys.

First, Mark was a messy guy in comparison to Johnny. The younger guy’s clothing can be seen everywhere in the house – a hoodie on a dining seat, a pair of shorts on the couch, and a t-shirt on top of the shower curtain.

However, it bothered you when he left his pants in your bedroom. “Mark Lee,” you started, “why did your pants end up here in my bedroom?” You held the pair of khakis in your hands and looked at it with disdain.

He gave you a sheepish grin before grabbing it from your hands. “I’m sorry, Essie noona, I thought this was my bedroom when I came here late at night yesterday. I was kind of drunk, so…”

You remembered that you slept over at Ten’s when you had to ask him for help on a project. Johnny was out of town, and Mark was the only one left in the apartment. You didn’t know that he ended up in your bed when you were out, and it made you blush.

“Make sure this doesn’t happen again, okay?” You softened your voice this time, and he nodded in response.

“I’m really sorry about this. How can I make it up to you?” Mark looked at you with puppy eyes and all your irritation on what he did vanish.

“Well, I suppose you can let me choose the movie we’re going to watch later tonight,” you said after carefully thinking of your answer.

“Sure, no problem! Would you like some coffee as well? My treat,” he flashed you a smile as he hung his pants over his shoulder.

“Johnny gets that for me usually, but since he’s not here, why not? You already know my order, right?”

“White Chocolate Mocha with low-fat milk and no whip.”

“That’s a good boy. Now,” you looked at him sternly again, “leave my room before I kick your butt!”

\\\

In the end, you decided to watch ‘A Serbian Film’. You were up for a horrible mindfuck, and Mark was hesitant on your pick.

“I mean, it’s okay if we watch a silly rom-com. I won’t mind at all,” He offered, scrolling through his Netflix account for a feel-good movie to watch.

“But aren’t you curious why it has a cult following, and why it’s banned?” You asked, eyes sparkling in excitement.

“Essie, don’t corrupt poor baby Mark,” Johnny chimed in, grabbing the DVD of the said film from your hands. He had just arrived from his trip and still had the energy to join you guys.

“What do you suggest we watch then?” You pouted, trying to get the DVD Johnny confiscated.

“How about ‘Benji’?” Mark’s suggestion got the taller guy squealing. “Oh my, let’s watch that! I haven’t watched a dog movie in ages!”

You noticed that Mark was laughing at his hyung’s reaction, which made you smile. His joy was contagious and later, you were laughing along. Johnny couldn’t stop gushing about dogs that eventually, you had to shut him up when Mark has already set up the television.

\\\

There were times Johnny can’t relate to you and Mark. For instance, both of you were almost in tears because of an inside joke only you and he have.

The three of you were eating dinner at home when a cucumber slice fell off your plate. This got Mark laughing, probably remembering the joke you two had about said vegetable one night ago.

You shot him a glare, but he didn’t see it. He kept on laughing until Johnny raised an eyebrow at him. “What’s so funny about a cucumber slice, Mark Lee?” You and Johnny tend to call the younger guy that whenever you berated him.

“Oh, nothing. Please, just ignore me,” He waved his hand to show that he was making a fuss out of nothing, but you weren’t buying it.

All of you continued eating in silence, but another cucumber slice fell off your plate again. “Essie, can you please look where your food is going?” Johnny sounded annoyed as he pointed his fork at the cucumber slice on the table.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to,” you mumbled, using your fork to get the vegetable. When you stabbed it too hard, Mark burst into laughter.

“Maaaark!” You and Johnny scolded, which the younger guy ignored. “But Essie noona!” he wheezed in between his laughter, pointing at the cucumber.

Eventually, you gave in and laughed as well. You had to admit, that was a pretty funny joke that you made.

Johnny groaned at the sight of you and Mark laughing your brains out. “If you don’t want to loop me in, then I’m going to excuse myself,” he said, quietly leaving the table.

You didn’t notice his absence as you and Mark continued to build upon your joke and laugh some more.

\\\

When you couldn’t sleep at night, you were grateful for their presence. Usually, Nini fell asleep on you while you blabbered about the existence of aliens or other conspiracy theories you watched on YouTube.

Now that you were living with the boys, they accompanied you on the couch with their preferred drink of choice – non-decaf coffee for Johnny and melon milk for Mark – and talked to you about anything.

However, there was a time that the older guy was the first to retire from your late-night talks. “I’m hitting the hay,” he said in between yawning. “Night, babies,” he patted Mark’s head while he pecked your cheek.

You resumed talking about crystal skulls as you and Mark curled in your respective corners of the sofa. You were animatedly discussing how they presumably came to be, and when he shared his opinion, you noticed that he also mimicked your hand gestures.

Before you knew it, the sun had already risen. Rays of sunlight peeked through the curtains, and you saw that Mark yawned.

“Well, let’s wrap this up,” you started to get up from the couch, “and go to sleep. All it took for you to yawn was the sun, eh?” You kid, making the younger guy chuckle.

“Thanks for spending some time with me, Marky.”

There was no sign of him getting up from the couch. “I’m too tired to get up now. I’ll sleep here,” he mumbled while grabbing one of the pillows beside him.

“Okay, I’ll go now,” you ruffled his hair before going back to your bedroom. “Sleep tight.”

\\\

“Dude, are you going to be there the whole day?”

You heard Johnny say from across your bedroom. You were reading a book, the door of your room slightly open when you heard one of your housemates talk in an exasperated manner.

No one responded. All you could hear was the loud sound of water coming from the shower.

“It’s been an hour already, Mark Lee!” Johnny was pounding on the door already. “I can’t hold it in anymore!”

“Hold up! I’m not yet done!” Mark finally spoke, making the older guy groan. “The other bathroom’s out of service, and I need to shit now!”

You couldn’t help but laugh at how hilarious this conversation was going, and even stood up to peek how Johnny was doing. He was crouching on the door, beads of sweat forming on his forehead. “Please Mark, hurry up,” he murmured, rubbing his stomach.

“Mark, please, Johnny needs to use the bathroom right now,” you shouted, hoping that he will understand his hyung’s predicament. You rushed to Johnny’s side and rubbed his back, which he appreciated. “Thanks, baby, I hope it helps,” he whispered.

A few minutes later, Mark emerged from the bathroom, and Johnny pushed him aside immediately. This made the younger guy stumble, and you stepped aside so he doesn’t fall over you. He fell flat on his face, and he cried in pain. “Johnny hyung, that hurt!” He said, clutching his knee towards his chest. You helped him stand up, and you saw that his ears were all red.

You just helped Mark Lee stand up from a humiliating fall while wearing a towel around his waist.

“Thanks, Essie noona,” he mumbled. You nodded and patted him on the back. “Please try to lessen your shower hours if you can, okay? Unless the other bathroom’s fixed, then I won’t stop you.”

Your words inspired him to make the repairs to the other bathroom to be done as soon as possible as he had a hand in fixing it.

Looks like no one can stop him and his long-ass showers.

\\\

“How about this, Essie noona?” Mark asked, holding up an orange hoodie in front of you.

You were in his bedroom as he wanted your opinion on what he would wear to a blind date set up by Yuta.

“Isn’t that a bit too casual? Where is the date going to happen?” You looked at the hoodie again, which was oversized and had text printed on the sleeves.

“It’s going to be a casual one,” he said, eyeing the garment as well, “maybe at a park or a café? I don’t want to be too overdressed.”

“Get another one. It’s too loud. And why are you asking me this instead of Johnny?”

Mark grinned first before he rubbed the back of his neck. “I want to ask you for a change, noona. I want to know what kind of clothing girls like their men to wear on a first date…”

His comment made you smile since he thought that your opinion mattered. “To be honest Marky, it doesn’t matter. But if you want to leave a good impression, try dressing up a little bit. Maybe a short-sleeve shirt with a vest on top? That’s a bit dorky and cute, just like you.”

When you realized that you told him that he was both dorky and cute, you covered your mouth. You just hoped he didn’t hear it.

“Oh, that’s a great suggestion. Okay, I’ll go with that. Thanks!” He gave you a fist bump, which you returned enthusiastically. “Sure thing, little bro. Good luck on your date!”

You left Mark’s bedroom thinking about how you wish you can tag along, and see how his blind date will turn out.

Maybe you and Johnny can go undercover and spy on him? You rushed into the room beside you, hoping that he will agree with your plan.

–––

FIN

P.S. Plot twist: Yuta is Mark’s blind date! And what could be his inside joke with Essie about cucumbers?

Jamming with Mark

Ever since this Relay Cam – I know there were previous instances of him showing off his guitar-playing skills – I knew I fell in love more with Mark Lee.

I can imagine him pursuing this path in the future, and you bet that I’m going to buy his solo acoustic album. Not that I don’t support Rapper Mark, but I am so whipped for this side of him. 

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :)

–––

Summary: Essie and Mark bond over a jamming session, where feelings are left to linger with the songs he decided to play for her. In short, here’s Mark as a guitar-playing crooner and some of the songs I wish he could play. 

POV: 2nd person. 

Word count: 900 + words. Wow, this is the shortest piece so far! 

Warning: There’s not much to say, but the lyrics of some of the songs are in bold. I just want to emphasize them just because. 

Recommended listening: Oh boy, we’ve got a lot here! I’ll list all of the songs at the bottom of this page for your listening. I hope you do imagine Mark playing this too! 

–––

You always pegged Mark as an R ‘n B-kind-of-guy. You weren’t surprised when you heard him cover Justin Bieber’s ‘What Do You Mean?’ on his guitar one time.

However, when he visited your apartment after being abroad for a couple of months, you didn’t expect him to play one of your favorites.

There was tension in the air when he started strumming ‘All Flowers In Time Bend Towards the Sun’ by Jeff Buckley and Elizabeth Fraser. You felt your heartbeat loudly against your chest, and you had to put a hand over it to calm it down.

That song was heartbreakingly beautiful, and sometimes you felt guilty listening to it. The song was demo leaked after the death of Buckley, never intended for a release. It felt like a secret between two people (who were ex-lovers in real life) that you weren’t supposed to know, but there it was for everyone to listen to.

He looked at you as his signal to start singing. Fraser’s part came first, and you did your best to emulate her famous vocalization. You closed your eyes, feeling the song to the bone.

When Mark’s part came on, you heard a difference in his voice. It was a bit deeper than usual, or maybe he’s channeling some Buckley in him.

The world stopped for you once you got to the chorus of the song. It was just you and Mark on the sofa, eyes locked on each other.

“All flowers in time bend towards the sun, I know you say that there’s no one for you, but here is one.”

As you repeat the lines over and over, you noticed that both of you were moving closer to each other.

Before you knew it, the song was done, and you felt breathless. You noticed Mark was audibly breathing as if the song was too heavy for him to sing.

“Wow Mark, I can’t believe you know this song,” you said, breaking the silence.

“Well, I’ve been listening to your playlist for the past few days,” he said, still a bit breathless.

Your eyes locked on each other again, and you felt your cheeks burn at how embarrassed you were feeling right now. You didn’t want Mark to feel that, so you continued to stare into his eyes, and you noticed that there was a glimmer in his.

“Want me to play another song?” His hands slid back to the strings of his guitar, and he steadied himself on the couch.

“Okay, show me what else you learned how to play,” you said, leaning your back on a pillow.

“It feels like I only go backwards, baby, every part of me says go ahead…” You weren’t expecting him to sing another heartbreaking song from your playlist.

He was now playing the most known Tame Impala song (‘Feels Like We Only Go Backwards’) that has been covered by many artists, but his version sounds similar to Alex Turner’s (of Arctic Monkeys fame).

You shut your eyes and let his playing calm you. Despite your attempts to feel chill, the lyrics bothered you a bit. It felt like he was singing it to you as a message.

To be honest, you weren’t completely honest with your feelings for him. He might be younger than you, but he expressed his desire to be with you. He declared, in front of your best friends Johnny and Key, that he will wait for you.

You felt that you were sending him mixed signals. There were times that you reciprocated his sweetness, and there were instances that you ignored them. He was a sweet kid, but the age gap made you feel uncomfortable.

Once he was done singing, you opened your eyes and saw that he looked concerned.

“Essie noona, why are you crying?”

You didn’t notice it until you felt the collar of your sweatshirt damp with tears. You wiped them away and looked away from him.

“Did I do something wrong?” You noticed that he moved closer, but he was hesitant to touch you.

“No, it’s just…me, being dramatic as always,” you said softly, wiping away all your tears. You didn’t mind if your eyes were a bit red, he has seen you in a worse state than this.

“Aw, don’t say that,” he said, and now he held your hand. You let him, and you were bold enough to let your fingers intertwine with each other. “Thank you Marky, you’ve always been kind to me.”

You shared shy smiles before he kissed your hand. You squeezed his in response before you let it go. It was calloused from all the guitar playing, but it felt warm.

“Do you want me to play another song again?” This time, he asked his question with only a few centimeters gap between you two.

“If you have been indeed listening to my playlist, can you play anything from the ‘Submarine’ soundtrack?” You replied with a smirk on your face, hoping this will challenge him.

It took him a moment to play something, as he was remembering the starting chords of the songs. When he found the one he was going to play, he faced you confidently and started playing ‘Stuck in the Puzzle’.

It felt fitting once more, and you didn’t feel attacked by it. You gave him a thumbs-up, and he continued singing, his emotions showing with each line.

“Fingers dimming the light like you’re used to being told that you’re trouble,” he looked at you for a moment before staring at the guitar again, “And I spent all night, stuck on the puzzle…”

You leaned your head on the sofa and looked at him adoringly. You loved moments like these with Mark – bonding over your love for music and discovering new artists to listen to.

How you wish things weren’t complicated with you liking a lot of guys, your best friend Johnny included…

–––

FIN

I Will Follow You Into The Dark

Here’s another piece I’ve written during depressing times, and I hope you’ll like it as much as you like my fluffy and sometimes sexually awkward stories. 

Get ready to see guitar-playing Mark Lee again here, so here’s a photo of that for you. 

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :)

–––

Summary: Although I’m not her biggest fan, I never thought that Sulli’s death would leave an impact on me. This piece was inspired by her passing last year, and my favorite comfort song whenever someone precious to me dies. 

POV: 3rd person this time. 

Word count: 1,300 + words 

Warning: There are mentions of self-harm here since Essie hasn’t been cured of it yet. 

Recommended listening: The title of the piece should already be a giveaway, but as always, I’ll put it down below so you can listen to it repeatedly while you read this. 

–––

Essie couldn’t believe it. One of her close friends, Yuki, committed suicide. There wasn’t any alarm or warning. She didn’t notice that her friend was struggling. Yuki was always smiling, comforting her every time she ranted about her life. Although they didn’t always meet, their phone conversations made up for it.

Whenever she was left alone in the house, one of the people she would always call was her. Pretty, timid, and kind Yuki. She looked delicate on the outside, but it turns out she was even more on the inside.

Essie learned the news from Aoi, a common friend of theirs. The girl was crying over the phone, and it took a couple of tries for Essie to understand the situation.

“Yuki’s dead, Essie. She hanged herself.”

The phone slipped out of her hand first before her body came next, hitting the cold floor with a hard thud. They were of the same age.

As she picked up the phone again, Aoi had already dropped the line. She sighed in frustration and wept at the sofa.

Good thing she was alone – she screamed at the top of her lungs first before bursting into tears once more.

\\\

Essie was a horrible mess the day after. She didn’t talk to Johnny or Mark. She was staying at their apartment for now since hers was under repair.

At first, the two guys chalked it up to PMS. But when they found out from Nini what happened, Johnny was the first to bang on Essie’s door.

“Baby, please open up,” he pleaded, close to tears at how his best friend had suddenly shut him off.

Essie wasn’t responding. She was curled up in a ball on her bed, still in her pajamas. Her mind was clouded with all the bad thoughts she had been repressing.

When someone takes their own life, she always had the itch to do the same.

She had a new pair of scissors on her desk. She also had a sharp letter opener inside one of her drawers. There were many objects that she could draw blood from.

She tuned out the world to listen to her diabolical yet devastating thoughts until it bored her to sleep.

\\\

When she did get out of her room, she saw Mark on the couch with his guitar. Her mouth was itching to say something, but it never came.

She did her best to move silently so he wouldn’t bother her. She just wanted to be alone, but at the same time, she couldn’t be left alone.

Both guys didn’t know of her suicidal tendencies, and if they do, they would never leave her side.

As Essie rummaged through the fridge (it was a bit far from the couch so she didn’t mind if Mark could hear the clinking of glass against plastic), she heard him strum the introduction of one of her favorite songs.

Love of mine, someday you will die                    

But I'll be close behind and I'll follow you into the dark

He always surprised her with the songs he sang with his guitar as of late. She couldn’t help but get teary-eyed again as he sang the melancholic song.  

Yuki was one of the people she truly cherished. They were childhood friends, just like with Nini. Although the latter was her forever classmate, Yuki became her close friend when they always joined the same clubs. They joined the choir, the dance club, and even the bookworm one. They kept in touch even if they went to different high schools and colleges. Now that they were both working, they still called each other almost daily.

However, all of that is gone as she took her own life yesterday.

If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied

And illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you when your soul embarks

Then I'll follow you into the dark

She got a pitcher of water from the fridge and closed it gently, still wanting not to be heard by Mark. On the contrary, the younger guy knew she was out of her room. He had a keen sense of listening, and he was familiar with how her footsteps sounded.

To sympathize with her situation, he decided to play a song that he thought fit the situation. He found one in her playlist, and it took him an hour to learn it.

And the soles of your shoes

Are all worn down

The time for sleep is now

But it's nothing to cry about

'Cause we'll hold each other soon in the blackest of rooms

He heard her sniffle, but he had to finish the song. He closed his eyes to concentrate, hoping he did justice to one of Death Cab for Cutie’s masterpieces.

As he strummed the last chord, he waited in silence if she would go to him or not. He was shocked that she did, holding a glass of water.

“Thanks for playing that, Mark. That was beautiful,” she started, her voice hoarse from crying.

He patted the space beside him, and she sat. She put the glass on the table first before she got a pillow to cover her rumpled pajamas.

“I’ve heard about Yuki…” he said, rubbing the back of his neck out of nervousness. He didn’t want to make her cry with his words. “And I thought of singing this song because I’m also empathizing with you…” He looked at his guitar as he ended his statement, afraid of her reaction.

“Thank you again, Mark. That’s sweet of you,” he heard her say gently, and he also heard the rustling of fabric. He suddenly felt warm, and he saw that her hand was on top of his.

“M-May I?” He asked, looking at her hand and his. She nodded, and he clasped it in his clammy hand. She didn’t mind it at all – it was the thought that mattered.

They held each other’s hand for a moment, feeling each other’s warmth. Eventually, he had to place the guitar on the floor as they faced each other. He saw how depressed she looked – her eyes were puffy and red, and there were tear stains on her clothes.

He wanted to hug her right then and there, which took him a lot of courage to do. It took him a few minutes before he pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her. He cradled her to his chest, and she buried her face on his shoulder.

Their embrace comforted her, and he even gently rocked their bodies together. “I’m here, Essie noona…I’ll always be here for you,” Mark said softly, one of his hands combing through her curly locks.

The older girl continued to cry, her face still on his shoulder. Her arms were loosely wrapped around his neck, which he had to adjust from time to time as he could feel them getting limp.

This was the closest they have ever been, and deep inside, he wished this moment would never end.

Alas, all good things come to an end – Johnny texted him that tomorrow morning was Yuki’s funeral. He texted Mark because it was futile to talk to his best friend, even though the information he was sharing was for her.

If only his hyung knew that he and Essie were having a moment right now…

As he told her of this information, the girl could only nod her head and broke off from his hold. She trudged towards her bedroom, and he helped her, one arm looped around her shoulder.

Once she was settled on her bed, he tucked her in and planted a kiss on her temple. “We’ll go there with you if you want,” he said as one of his hands found its way into her hair again. He loved combing through her hair and seeing how satisfied she is whenever he took out some difficult knots.

“Yes, please. I need you two,” she murmured. Mark continued to play with her hair until she fell asleep.

“Sweet dreams, my dear Essie noona,” he whispered before closing the door to her room.

–––

FIN

The Dream Synopsis

Sometimes, you write with a goal in mind, and then it ends up in a way you didn’t expect it to. Does anyone have a similar, if not the same, experience? 

Let me know through the comments! 

Anyway, here’s Johnny looking like he stepped out of my dream in this GIF. 

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :) 

–––

Summary: This was supposed to be a sweet and fluffy Johnny and Essie piece, but then I don’t know why I had to include hurt and angsty Mark into the mix.

POV: 3rd person here. 

Word count: 1,300 + words 

Warning: I never go all the way yet with Johnny and Essie, but this is the closest thing we’ll get to them getting it on for now. 

Recommended listening: I’m going to include the song that shares the same title below. If you must know, and if it isn’t obvious enough with the previous song recommendations, I’m a big Alex Turner fan.

–––

It was during their off-days that Johnny cherished his time with Essie the most.

He loved lazy weekend afternoons, with the curtains gently moving because of the cool breeze. He and Essie would be on the couch, listening to a curated playlist either one of them made or a record of their choosing. Jaehyun gifted them a record player like his, which delighted the girl.

They usually talked about anything and everything while they were on the sofa. Most of the time, Essie would be lying on top of Johnny’s lap, raising her arms in the air to illustrate her point. Sometimes, he would lean his head against her shoulder and then bury his face in her chest when he wanted to cuddle further.

Their hands were always over and around each other, making them a giggly, tangled mess. They would be more so when they had drinks on the coffee table – coffee for Johnny and beer for Essie. They loved how each other tasted when they kissed. Essie became more tolerant of bitter tastes while Johnny became desensitized to the stench of alcohol.

In one of those ideal moments, he talked to her about his recent dream. “I was playing the piano at an empty theater, wearing the usual velvet suits they make us wear. And I was told that it was a full house,” his eyes never left her face as he shared his story.

“Maybe the organizer was a ghost, and a bunch of dead people were there watching your performance,” she replied after a moment, a smile forming on her face.

“Isn’t that creepy, baby? I mean, what the heck? Why would I dream of dead people?” He sat up, shaking his head a little. He ran his hands through his hair, which seemed to help him compose himself.

Essie watched him fuss about his hair still with the same dopey smile on her face. The little things he did always made her heart feel warm and fuzzy, as cheesy as it sounds. She was extremely lucky to call him hers, which she hoped he felt the same way.

The guy didn’t notice the look of adoration on his girlfriend’s face as he cleared his throat, staring into the space ahead. “Sorry, baby, am I boring you with my story? It must be torture when I talk about my dreams…” he mumbled, tucking his head into his chin with shame.

“No, not at all! I find it fascinating, really.” The girl shifted from her position and moved closer to him. “Talking about dreams is interesting. You can interpret them in a million ways.”

When he noticed that her eyes twinkled even in the dim light of the living room, he couldn’t help but pull her closer to him and kiss her.

She responded to his action with no hesitation, hooking her arms around his neck immediately. They forgot about their world around them as they kissed.

However, they forgot that they still had a housemate who can come in whatever time he pleases.

As the couple made out with gusto, Mark Lee entered their apartment and dropped his bag on the floor. The thud it made didn’t bother Johnny and Essie, as the couple was intent on sucking each other’s faces until they were tired.

Unfortunately, it wasn’t time yet for them to stop. Essie started moaning as Johnny’s hands went down her bottom, cupping it with all his might. It made the guy grunt at how sexy that sounded, and both exchanged small (and dirty) nothings to each other.

Mark couldn’t believe what he was seeing. He wanted to sneak into his room as quietly as possible but he couldn’t keep his eyes away from the couple.

Deep inside, he felt a bit of hurt resurface. He liked Essie more than a noona. He admitted his feelings to her before, yet she politely declined him.

“Maybe it’s not the time yet, Marky. Maybe in another lifetime. But just so you know, I love you as a friend and as the little brother I never had,” those were her famous words that took him some time to recuperate from, and now the pain was back momentarily.

As he was rooted in spot watching his hyung and noona about to get it on, something inside him snapped. He walked away as silently as he could, his eyes downcast. He would watch some funny videos on YouTube to help him erase this image.

But Mark being Mark, he stubbed his toe on the dining table. “Shit,” he hissed in pain, slowly reaching his hand to soothe his toe.

The sound he made got the attention of the couple who were now looking at him.

“Oh, Mark,” Johnny started, gently prying Essie off him. “I thought you’d be back tomorrow morning.”

“Uh, flight was early. Decided to come home immediately. I missed my bed.” The young guy’s answers were clipped despite sounding like his usual self. Essie picked up on this and frowned.

“Sorry you had to see that, Marky…” she said softly, now standing up.

“No, it’s fine. You’re a couple now anyways. Making out is something couples do all the time,” he chuckled before he stepped out of the dining room completely.

Silence hung in the air for a moment until Johnny coughed. “Wow, that was a bit awkward,” he started, looking at his girlfriend.

Essie sighed, plopping back on the couch. “I know. I think he’s not yet over, you know…”

It was the guy’s turn to sigh. “I think so too, baby. But give it time. He’ll be over it.”

“You think so?” She looked up at him in worry, her eyes turning glassy with tears.

“Yeah, I do,” he sat closer to her, “and I don’t want to lose him too. He’s both the little brother we never had.”

“I find it a bit unfair that many people are affected with our relationship, and in a not-so-good way,” Essie huffed, wiping the tears that formed in the corner of her eyes.

“I know, baby. But that’s just the way it is, I guess?” Johnny leaned back on the couch, “You can’t win them all. We’re both good-looking people who click so well. And we’re friendly to everyone. We can’t help but make people fall for us.” This got the girl chuckling, who was now leaning back on the sofa as well.

“I never expected that I’ll be liked this much,” she said softly, her eyes looking at the space in front of her. It was a realization that never seemed to sink into her mind, considering how plain and normal she looked.

“Well, baby, you are wrong about that. Turns out that you’re almost everyone’s type,” he eyed her from head to toe, earning a thwack on his shoulder.

“Don’t say that!” She looked away to cover her reddening face. “I don’t know. I am flattered, but at the same time, I don’t deserve this.”

“Aw, come on!” Johnny tilted her face to look at him, and his heart ached when he saw tears coming out of her warm face. “You deserve all the love, my darling. But you can’t give it to everyone, especially if you’re looking for a partner. And I’m the happiest person to be the recipient of that special kind of love.”

Essie broke down into tears, which Johnny kissed away from her face.

“I love you, Essie Park. Please know that. Nothing can change that.”

Although his words came to her, she was at a loss on what to say. She was overwhelmed with her realization and his confession.

“Oh, John…” she mumbled, burying her face on his chest.

He held her in his arms as she wept, but his mind was thinking if she loved him as much as he did.

–––

FIN

Cool Off (Part II)

After the giggles come the tears again, and here is the second and final installment of this brief series. 

Expect a lot of depressing music here too, so if you’re up for those, I hope you’ll like my recommendations. 

Here's a photo of a young Johnny playing in front of the piano as a fitting teaser.

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :) 

–––

Summary: Read Johnny cope with Essie’s short-lived disappearance as he sings the most heartbreaking songs that she loves. 

POV: Keeping it up with 3rd person. 

Word count: 943 words 

Warning: There’s nothing that you haven’t read yet in other stories, but Italics are for thoughts and lyrics. Mostly the latter though, because I went ham with that one. 

Recommended listening: The titles of the songs are mentioned in the story, so I’ll add them at the end of the story for your listening. Feel free to suggest songs of the same caliber – I would appreciate it so much! 

–––

Since Essie hasn’t returned from her self-imposed exile, Johnny has been on his piano a lot. He usually played depressing hits late at night, probably during times when he couldn’t fall asleep due to the situation. Although Mark hears him play from the comfort of his room, this time he was able to catch his hyung hunched over the keyboard in the living room as he sang his heart out to ‘The Songwriter’ by Father John Misty.

What would it sound like if you were the songwriter

And you made your living off of me?

It was heartbreaking to see Johnny struggle with his performance, whether he was aware that someone was watching him or not. Mark bit his lip as he watched his housemate from a dark corner, crossing his arms repeatedly until he felt comfortable with his position.

Goodbye little songbird, now you’re free

Don’t forget I’m the only fan of yours who has the sense to ever leave you be

How could do this to me?

That last line broke the older guy as he stopped playing and cried for what seemed like an eternity. Mark was glued to his spot, trying not to cry with his hyung.

Never has he seen Johnny so broken over someone, and he wished that Essie would come back soon. However, even if she does come back, it would either be to resume the relationship or cut it off completely. He hoped that it was the former because Johnny will never be the same again.

What would it sound like if you were the songwriter

And loving me was your unsung masterpiece?

The six-footer stood up after finishing the song and returned to his room. It was Mark’s cue to return as well, and he found it hard to sleep after hearing that soul-crushing song.

It got more depressing after that – Johnny sang ‘Without You’ by Tobias Jesso Jr. at three in the morning, which the younger guy remembered was the most straightforward depressing song Essie ever heard. Maybe that’s why he’s playing it, he thought while he lay on his bed.

Why can’t you just love me?

Should I move on or should I wait?

And how’d you get so high above me?

I reach higher every day

But nothing changes

No, it all just stays the same

Mark heard his hyung’s voice break when the chorus came, and he couldn’t help but cover his ears a bit out of secondhand embarrassment and hurt.

I can hardly breathe without you

There is no future I want to see without you

I just don’t know who I would be without you

There is nothing out there for me without you

Without you

Once Johnny was done playing, his crying was the next sound that permeated the whole apartment.

The last song that Mark heard from his hyung before Essie returned was ‘The Ultracheese’ by the Arctic Monkeys, which he knew the couple adored. The band was one of the things that brought them closer, and it was during their concert that Johnny realized he was in love with Essie.

The song was not as depressing as the previous ones, but it still sounded painful as the older guy sang with all his hurt.  

Still got pictures of friends on the wall

I suppose we aren’t really friends anymore

Maybe I shouldn’t ever have called that thing friendly at all

This time, Johnny was able to compose himself and not let his emotions get to the best of his singing. Mark closed his eyes to savor his hyung’s rendition since it was not always he heard him cover a song like this.

Oh, the dawn won’t stop weighing a tonne

I’ve done some things that I shouldn’t have done

But I haven’t stopped loving you once

The croon at the end made the song more melancholic than it is, and the sole audience made his presence known by clapping loudly.

Johnny whipped his head to look at Mark, who was silently crying as he continued to clap. “That was amazing, hyung,” he said, slowly approaching the performer.

“Thanks, dude,” Johnny whispered, looking away from the younger guy. “I miss her so much. I wish she’ll come back now.”

“She will. You’ve just got to be patient.”

“It’s been almost two months, Mark Lee. I’m worried that she has moved on with another person. She should let me know if we’re going to continue this or not, you know?”

Johnny’s voice was starting to break again, and Mark went to his side to comfort him.

“I’m sure she will. Maybe she’ll be back tonight. I can feel it.”

His words proved to be true as the girl returned a bit past after midnight, reeking of cigarette smoke.

Mark was speechless as she popped into his room first and asked him what had happened since then.

“Noona, I’m happy you’re back and all, but please don’t cause any more trouble to your relationship with Johnny hyung by talking to me first,” he said, hoping that his honesty will not be taken against him.

“I’m sorry, Marky. But I wanted to return with a surprise. Is he asleep now?”

He took a deep breath first before responding. “Please, noona. You can surprise him now if you want. I’m sure he would be happier if he was the person you talked to.”

“Sheesh, no need to be grumpy with me, Mark,” she chuckled. “And I’m sorry again for this. Okay then, I might as well surprise him now. Thank you.” With that, she went to Johnny’s room, and they made up for lost time with tears and snuggles.

–––

FIN

Cruel Game

Shaking things up with this brain fart because too much lovey-dovey can get on your nerves. Well, sometimes. Or is it just me? 

Anyway, I just want to share that I love any Jaehyun and Mark interactions. I like how chill both are, and let’s be honest – they give off frat boy vibes. 

I love this GIF of them – I feel the love, man! GIF is from this link.

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :) 

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Summary: Sharing that I love Jaehyun and Mark’s friendship is a clue to what you’ll be reading today, as the guys are fueled by their jealousy to get Essie’s heart. Say what?! Yes, I wrote this with the tensest timeline in mind, meaning it’s before Johnny and Essie got together and are getting real touchy with each other. 

POV: 3rd person 

Word count: 1,200 + words 

Warning: Italics are for thoughts and foreign terms. 

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Jaehyun knew he lost when he saw the look Essie and Johnny shared during one of their hangouts.

The grey-haired heartthrob, along with Taeyong and Ten, decided to visit their friends Mark, Johnny, and Essie (who also happen to be housemates). It has been a while since Mark and Taeyong were in their respective apartments due to their hectic schedules, and it has been ages since all of them hung out with Ten.

He, Taeyong, and Johnny cooked while Ten, Mark, and Essie provided entertainment through singing with their respective instruments or dancing. The three men prepared a mix of both Korean and Japanese food, which delighted the only girl in the house. “It’s as if you know what I’m craving for!” She gushed, clapping her hands together in glee.

“Of course, I know what you like,” Jaehyun commented confidently with a wink, making her blush. His action was not lost on Johnny, who looked as if he could burn a hole on the back of his friend’s head. “Thank you, Jay!” Essie chirped before she nudged Ten to help her in setting the table.

Once that was set, everyone sat down and enjoyed their dinner. It was during this part of the evening that Jaehyun knew that Essie has made up her mind on whom she likes the most. It was not lost on him that he was one of the people who first knew of her crush on Johnny and other guys in their huge social circle. If he remembered correctly, the only ones from the group she told of were him and Ten.

He caught Johnny tapping her shoulder lightly to whisper something in her ear. He noticed the way she leaned immediately to his touch and giggled at the few words he said. They shared a look before they went back to eating.

If he was asked to describe the look they gave each other, it was one of sweet longing and understanding. In short, he was jealous that he wasn’t the one who received it.

Jaehyun tightened the grip on his utensils as he continued eating dinner, feeling his face heat up in anger. “Hey, hyung. You okay?” Mark asked, who was seated to his left. He nodded in response and gave a goofy smile to reassure him.

“But your ear is, like, all red,” Ten commented before eating a whole sushi. He touched his ear and felt that he was going to get burned with how hot it was. “Oh, maybe it must be the weather? Or the room’s a bit too warm,” he mumbled before focusing on his plate again.

“Did you say it’s too hot, Jay? I can adjust the temperature of the AC,” Essie offered, now standing up to go to where she placed the remote of the air conditioner. “Yeah, thanks dear,” he said softly, looking at her figure disappear into the living room.

“Hey, that’s not where the remote for the AC is, you dummy! It’s over here,” Johnny said, following the girl into the room she went to. The sight of his friend going to where his crush was made him massage his temples in silence, which then led him to lose his appetite.

“I don’t think you’re okay, hyung,” Mark whispered, moving his chair closer to the table. The sound it made turned heads, and all of them looked at the two guys. “What?” Jaehyun was irritated at the looks he got from Taeyong and Ten.

“Yeah, you don’t seem well, Yoon Oh. Do you need a break?” Taeyong said carefully since he didn’t want to irk his housemate. After all, they were going home the same way in the same car.

“I think so. I’ll just be outside,” Jaehyun muttered before going outside to the porch. Mark excused himself shortly afterward and went to where he was as well.

The two men observed the night scenery in silence – well, they could still hear the sound of cicadas chirping and clicking and their heavy breathing.

“What brings you here, Mark?” He started, folding his arms over his chest.

“I think I know what set you off,” the younger guy replied, moving closer to him.

“Oh, you think? Then humor me. Tell me what that is,” his tone was sarcastic, which Mark picked up and returned in his response.

“Don’t think you’re the only one who’s annoyed with Johnny and Essie making goo-goo eyes at each other.”

They looked at each other for a moment and burst into laughter afterward. “Hey, why are you annoyed with them? What did they do to you? Sucks that you have to endure that, eh?” Jaehyun took a seat on the bench, and Mark followed suit. “It’s not that they did anything to me, but I think…I like Essie noona more than, you know, as a sister figure.” The way his voice softened at the end made the older guy’s heart ache.

“Damn, Mark. I didn’t know you felt that way. I guess…you can say the same thing about me too,” he brushed his hair away from his face and looked out into the dark horizon again. “It’s not usual for me to be jealous, especially towards one of my best friends. But I can’t help it. I like Essie too, but I think she has made her decision on who she likes the most.”

“Huh? What does that mean?” Mark moved closer to his hyung, his eyes shining in anticipation with his next words.

Oh crap, this is bad. I shouldn’t have phrased it that way…he thought, running another hand through his hair.

“Let’s just say that Essie likes a lot of guys, and among them all, Johnny is the one she likes the best. And unfortunately, none of us made that list. Isn’t that sad?”

It took a moment for Mark to reply. “Maybe she wouldn’t tell us that if she liked us that way, you know? But maybe she likes one of us too, or heck, even just one of us aside from Johnny hyung. But who are we to compete with him?” He peeked inside and saw that he and Essie were arguing on the dinner table.

“Hey, be confident with yourself, Mark Lee. Suh Youngho isn’t the only handsome and talented guy in the room,” Jaehyun patted his friend’s back before sneaking a look on the commotion inside. He saw that Essie looked pissed, and Johnny was rolling his eyes at her.

“But they look like a fucking married couple already,” Mark mumbled, his eyes also focused on the two. “I think they’re meant for each other.”

“Don’t lose hope. Why don’t you try?” Both men returned to looking at the night sky. “You know, talking with you made me not give up on pursuing Essie. I felt that I have already lost. That sickeningly sweet look she and Youngho had earlier broke me, man. I swear to you,” the older guy admitted, his eyes now focused on his shoes.

“But that means we’ll be competing for her then,” the black-haired guy glanced at Jaehyun, who was now looking at him. “I still want to try, you know. Even if I know deep inside she might not accept my love.”

“That’s the spirit, I guess?” Jaehyun chuckled, slinging an arm around Mark’s shoulder. “May the best man win then.”

“Good luck to us, hyung. I mean it.”

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FIN

P.S. The title came from ‘Sit Down’ as it suddenly played in my head the moment I saved the initial draft. Of course, how can I forget Jaehyun’s lines and his competitive spirit?