Bangtan Angst - Tumblr Posts

the blue notebooks

↳ time travel au

◇ pairing: jimin | reader ◇ genre: fluff, angst ◇ word count: 8.575 ◇ warnings: none ◇ author’s note: this story will have a sequel since there is much, much more I want to tell, but I wanted to keep it under 10k and I figured this part worked well as a standalone. please enjoy :)

You meet Park Jimin after a particularly rough landing.

You wish time traveling was as easy as the books like to describe, or as beautifully romantic as the movies depict. It is a concept that’s been overly embroidered with advantages that do not exist — and even if normal humans see it as a fortuitous skill, one they long to have, they rarely realize that having a normal life is out of the question for your kind. Even so, there is no point in wishing for something that won’t happen in this lifetime, not with the time traveling genes burning strong within your veins.

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Park Jimin Mafia!au

Jerk Barista (AU!Yoongi x OC) Part 4

Okay I’m doing something new and weird and I’m going to try and schedule a new part to come out every day at 10 (CT) for the next three days (September 11-13 and/or 14) mainly because I have soooo much written... I hope people still like this story because I spent days (more like days over a few months) rewriting about 20 pages worth of plot... ^^;

Genre (By chapter): Angst pretty much Words: 900+ First - Part 3 - Part 5

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

It didn’t take long for the day to end as Yoongi’s shift was ending. He was having to leave Mari alone at the place, but she claimed she’d be fine. Without worrying too much, he made his way out the door after saying goodbye.

Though her words from earlier started to play through his mind again as he mentally scolded himself.

“Oh! The guy just texted me back and told me his friend was available tonight!” Mari smiled and Yoongi did his best to be happy for her. He smiled and nodded in response, then turned around to start cleaning the counters.

“I didn’t think it would be so soon, but it wouldn’t hurt to go ahead and meet someone new. I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve had a date.” Mari smiled sadly, but turned away from Yoongi quickly after those words, “I’ll ask Oppa if I can close the shop shortly after you get off.”

Yoongi shook his head to get the thoughts out as he jumped into his car. He didn’t like how much something like that was bothering him, but he wasn’t really surprised that it was.

His mind continued to repeat that scene until he clinched his fists on his steering wheel and began to let out a string of insults toward himself for getting this way. Since when had he become so weak? Why was he so weak when it came to her? She seemed so strong and independant and he was like a shriveled up piece of paper on a busy street in Seoul, torn and forgotten.

He finally arrived to his second job as he grabbed his change of clothes. A long sigh escaped his mouth as he glanced in the mirror, mumbling at how bad he looked. Attempting to push the thoughts to the back of his mind, he stepped out of his car and slammed the door, hoping he gets sent home early tonight.

---

The door to Yoongi’s apartment closed as he glanced at the clock, happy to be home two hours earlier than he thought he would be. His stomach started to make noises and he sighed, deciding to head for the kitchen first. He started to take off his jacket when he heard laughter from the kitchen, causing him to stop in his tracks.

Did Jimin have someone over?

Yoongi’s stomach dropped to the floor as he heard another laugh, and he knew that laugh better than he would have liked.

“Jimin!” Yoongi called as the place got silent again. It only took him a few seconds to reply, “Hyung? You’re home early.”

Yoongi didn’t want to head into the kitchen, but there really was no getting around it. The kitchen is right near his room, so he couldn’t even just go hide in there while Jimin was on his date.

On his way to the kitchen, he felt his dread turn into anger. He sharply turned the corner and felt his eyes land on Mari’s wide ones. She seemed just as surprised as him.

“Y-Yoongi?” she choked out, and Jimin looked shocked as well. What was going on here?

“What the hell are you doing with Jimin?” Yoongi asked, cursing himself for sounding as angry as he was.

“You live with him?” She started to get really nervous, and Jimin got even more confused.

“You know each other?” he asked, running his fingers through his hair, “How did I not know you knew each other?”

“How did I not know that you’re the guy she was telling me you were going out with?” Yoongi’s anger was getting harder and harder to hold back as Jimin started to piece things together. How did he not see this before? He had to be blind… Well, him and Taehyung both, as Taehyung was the one that suggested the date.

“Hyung, I’m sorry- if I had known-”

Yoongi sighed and rubbed his face with his hands. He needed to calm down… he didn’t want to say anything stupid- “Ugh, you know what Jimin? Just do what you want. It’s not like I own her or anything. I blew any chances a long time ago.”

Jimin swallowed his nerves as he watched Yoongi storm off and slam his door in anger. Mari flinched at the loud noise as her eyes shifted to Jimin.

Their date had been going so well… she could help but find herself upset with the news. How could Yoongi, of all people, be his roommate? There are millions of other people in the world, yet he was the one that just had to be Jimin’s roommate.

“Mari…” Jimin started to speak, but Mari raised her hand to signal him to stop speaking. She didn’t look at him, but just from the side of her face, he could tell she was mad and upset.

“I’m sorry, Jimin,” she spoke through her teeth, “I really like you, but I won’t put you in a place to upset him further. We should probably not speak again.”

Jimin couldn’t help but get a little upset at her words, but he was glad she said them for him. The last thing he wanted was to reject her after such a great date. Although he thought she was cool and pretty cute, there wasn’t girl that he would let come between any of his friends.

He just silently watched her get up and leave the apartment, letting out a few sniffs along the way. He didn’t like seeing her like that one bit, but there was nothing he could do but just watch her leave.

This one is kinda short (same with the next one) but hopefully after that they’ll get longer! Thank you for reading! Be looking forward to more being posted at 10 (CT) for the next few days!

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-Admin Jinnie

Jerk Barista (AU!Yoongi x OC) Part 5

I’m actually double uploading today since I didn’t realize that this one is seriously short... Also, I just wanted to clairify that Yoongi was originally the guy that Mari was set up with, but it was hard to continue the plot from there, so I changed it to Jimin! In part 3 it said something that I forgot to fix, so sorry about that!

Genre: still angst Words: 400+ First - Part 4 - Part 6

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

It was awkward between Yoongi and Jimin the next morning when they both ended up in the kitchen at the same time. Yoongi was about to head to the shop again since Jungkook was still sick, and he was not looking forward to seeing Mari there. He had no idea how she would react, and part of him just wishes he could avoid talking about it for the rest of his life.

Jimin wanted to start saying something to him, but he had no idea what to even say to him.

“Hey man, sorry for dating the girl you’re in love with,” yeah, that would go over well with him.

“You should do your own d*** laundry for once,” Yoongi broke the silence, “I’m sick of doing it.”

Jimin took a deep breath and nodded, “Neh, I’ll do it when I get home.”

The rest of the morning was silent between the two as Jimin tried to find words to say. No matter how hard he tried, nothing was coming to mind, and it was frustrating him.

It wasn’t like it was his fault that he ended up on a date with her, anyway. If anyone was to blame, it was Taehyung who told him to go on a date with her, or Yoongi who didn’t even bother to tell either of them who the girl he had fallen for was.

“Hyung,” Jimin sounded a little angrier than he would have liked, “you really shouldn’t be mad at me. I didn’t know she was the girl you liked, and if I had, I wouldn’t have gone on a date with her.”

Yoongi totally ignored Jimin as he headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Jimin followed him despite knowing it would annoy him.

“I won’t go on another date with her,” Jimin said, “Even if I did like her, I would never break the bro code. Losing a friend like that is not worth it.”

Yoongi continued to ignore him as Jimin was starting to get annoyed.

“Hyung, you should answer me,” you could hear the anger in his voice as Yoongi glanced at him in the mirror. He finished brushing his teeth and then turned toward him, waiting for him to move out of his way.

Jimin didn’t budge, and Yoongi’s patience was growing thin. “You’re blocking my path.”

“I know,” Jimin shrugged. Yoongi glared at him and took a deep breath.

“Jimin, knock it off. You’re pissing me off, and I don’t want to talk to you right now. I already have to talk to Mari later.”

Jimin sighed and decided to move out of the way before he upset him too much. Yoongi was out the door nearly seconds after he moved passed Jimin, and he just sighed in his place next to the door.

“Aish, I hope she doesn’t pull anything on him that makes him more upset.” he mumbled, walking to his room to change into his work clothes.

I hope it was still enjoyable! Thank you for reading!

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

-Admin Jinnie

Jerk Barista (AU!Yoongi x OC) Part 6

I wish I could say this was nearing to the end, but I’m probably going to have up to 10 parts in this one like my last story... I hope no one minds! I’m almost done as to what all I’ve written, but it’ll be a while until that is posted, because I’ve neglected posting parts for so long on this.

Genre: still angst Words: 1,400+ First - Part 5 - Part 7

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

When Yoongi walked into the building, he was already in a sour mood. He was trying to calm down, but he just continued to grow more and more frustrated at everything that had happened

While he felt super annoyed, when Mari walked out to the front, he could feel most of it melting away. She looked all worn out and upset; nothing like she did yesterday.

His frustration turned to worry as he began thinking about his work day ahead of him. He was stuck here with her all day since he didn’t have to work his second job. Mari didn’t seem any more thrilled than she was at this fact, and they both just wanted to shrivel out of existence.

The pre-opening cleanup had been taking longer than usual, and the place was totally silent, save for the loud machines and air conditioner around them.

“You need to get the creamer packets back out,” Mari broke the silence as Yoongi’s heart jumped at the sound of her voice. She definitely wasn’t the person she was yesterday.

“I’ll get that in a second,” he quietly replied as he finished wiping off the counter.

There was another silence as the two of them finished up the preparations for opening. Yoongi started to get really nervous and upset as he noticed Mari was avoiding him. They were about to open in a minute, and she totally out of it, as was he.

Before he could even try and say anything, Mari sighed and started to put her hair in a ponytail. Yoongi watched her silently as she finished and then put her hat on, her eyes moving to his. She raised her eyebrows and Yoongi looked away, taking a deep breath to calm his nerves.

He cared way too much about this situation, and he wasn’t dealing with it well.

“I’m going to go turn on the open signs,” Mari told Yoongi as she once again jumped over the counter to get out from behind it. Yoongi just silently watched her as she turned on the electronic signs and flipped the one on the door to say “open.”

She turned around and headed back behind the counter, careful to not get her shoes on the counter. Yoongi just continued watching her. He wanted to talk to her, but it was so hard to talk to her. He didn’t know where to start, and he didn’t want to let his sour emotions get to him. He wasn’t used to being put in this situation. Normally it was the girl(s) that were after him that liked him rather than the other way around.

“Mari…” Yoongi mumbled, but she didn’t act like she even heard him. “Can you please listen to me?”

“We just opened up. We’ll probably have customers coming in.”

“Mari, please,” he sounded a lot more desperate than he would have liked, “I really messed up, okay? I don’t express my emotions well, and it’s not helping that you won’t listen to me.”

Mari’s eyebrows raised and she turned to Yoongi, “You want me to listen to you? You really want me to listen to you? Well, if you’re not going to listen to me, then why the heck would I listen to you?”

Yoongi took a deep breath so that he didn’t start yelling, “You haven’t exactly tried to say anything.”

Mari just sighed and rubbed her forehead as if it would help her current mood in any way.

“I’m sorry,” He sighed, “I can’t help what I’ve already done, and I can’t help the fact that Jimin is my friend. I can’t help the fact that my friends don’t really know what has gone on in my life the past few years. It’s not like I set you up on the date with him.”

Mari still didn’t say anything as Yoongi could feel himself growing really impatient.

“I’ve already thrown all my dignity on the ground for you, is there anything else you want from me?”

Mari was getting really annoyed with what he was saying, “Really? You’ve thrown your dignity away? How the h*** have you done that?”

Yoongi tried his hardest to keep from yelling at her, “You would know if you listened!”

Mari took a deep breath and closed her eyes, looking away from him. She moved in front of the register, “This was a bad idea. I can’t be around you or near you without you somehow messing up my life. I’m sorry, Min Yoongi, but this won’t work.”

Yoongi couldn’t help but get mad at this point, “It’s not my fault things happened this way! Blame Taehyung for telling you to go out with Jimin! It’s not like I’m setting out to ruin your life. I didn’t even want you to go on that stupid date in the first place!”

Mari felt tears burning her eyes, but she tried her hardest to not let them fall. “It wasn’t you who organized it, but you’re the reason why Jimin won’t give me a chance! If you could just get over me and find someone else you can emotionally abuse, that would be great.”  Mari snapped back, ripping off her hat and throwing it at him.

“I’ve been nothing but nice to you since I saw you again and this is how you’re treating me?!” Yoongi cried as she started to jump over the counter. After she was over, she turned around and looked at him, tears starting to fall down her face.

“I’m not strong, Min Yoongi. I can’t trust people easily anymore, and it’s because of you. I felt so used- I felt like you actually had feelings for me before. You treated me different than other girls, and I thought it meant something good. I really thought it was a good thing.

“You would tease me, and I’d heard all my life that it meant a guy likes you if they teased you! I started to think that maybe you felt the same way, so I started to look forward to seeing you, even if we just argued the whole time. It seemed so fairytale-esque, and I guess it was all just in my head. I can’t even begin to explain how deep it hurt me that you took love as a joke. It made me realize that this whole time it was all one sided, and I felt humiliated.

“I thought that getting away from you would help, but I guess I just didn’t get far enough away from you, because you’re still effecting my life, anyway. I can’t do this anymore, Yoongi. I can’t take us being near each other. It would ruin me emotionally.”

Mari wiped some tears from her face as she turned around and took a deep breath. She didn’t want to look at him any longer, she just wanted out.

“Have a nice life, Min Yoongi.” Mari said as she walked out the door.

Yoongi had nothing to say in response as he watched her walk out the door. That was it. That was probably the last he would see of her, and he could say that he was totally fine with it.

The door opened again as a customer walked in, and he walked to the register to get ready to take her order.

The customer walked up to the register, but when she looked at him to give him her order, her face filled with concern. “Are you alright? You seem to be crying...”

Yoongi quickly wiped his face and found the tear that had made it’s way out of his eye. How long had it been since he last cried? “Oh, I’m sorry. I’ll be fine. What can I get for you?”

The customer ordered and left soon after, telling him that she hoped his day would get better. He bowed slightly and thanked her, watching her exit the store. It wasn't long after that he felt another tear trailing down his face. He quickly wiped it and took a deep breath, feeling another. They started coming faster as he started to get frustrated, wiping them away as fast as he could.

After a few minutes, they still hadn’t stopped. The longer it was since she had left, the more tears fell, and he hated it. He hated feeling this way, and he felt pathetic. He was ready to get over her. If she was gone for good, it didn’t make sense to cry about her.

From then on, he swore that he was done with her. If she didn’t need him, he certainly didn’t need her.

Another part done! I’m still having scheduled posts for this story every morning at 10am(CT) and I’ve got a good few more days worth! I hope you stay tuned for those coming up!

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

-Admin Jinnie

Jerk Barista (AU!Yoongi x OC) Part 7

This one is the longest in a while ^^; More drama ensues, and I’m sorry for all the time skips! ^^; I hope you enjoy!

Genre: angst yet again with some awkward squeezed in Words: 1,600+

First - Part 6 - Part 8

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

“I told you no,” Yoongi sighed and rubbed his forehead in frustration, “If I wanted a girl I would get out of here and find one.”

Jimin and Taehyung were sitting across from him in the booth they were sitting in. The three of them were hanging out at Jimin’s parent’s restaurant, which had become fairly regular for them to do. Normally Jungkook and/or Hoseok would join them, but neither of them were available. Jungkook was on a date with his new fiance and Hoseok was busy at work.

Taehyung leaned his head back against the booth’s cushion as Jimin sighed, “Hyung, it’s been year since you’ve last tried dating someone. Just because that last girl was clingy… and slightly crazy, doesn’t mean that every girl is like that. That’s why you don’t pick up girls in the bar when you’re drunk.”

“I’m single by choice,” Yoongi shook his head, “And I don’t understand why you guys have so much of a problem with it.” He took a sip of his drink as Taehyung and Jimin looked to each other, both concerned for their friend.

“It’s just because it’s been… six years since then.” Jimin slightly mumbled, trying not to talk about it too much, “and it’s like ever since you’ve been more cold hearted towards girls than before. I thought you would be over it by now-”

Yoongi shot a glare in Jimin’s direction, “I’ve been over it for years. That’s why I don’t want to date, because I’m done with what love does to people. It feels awful and I hate it. You guys can get all the girlfriends you want, but I’m content with being alone.”

Taehyung started playing with the rim of his drink, “Hyung… you are 100% over her, correct?”

“Correct.” Yoongi said without missing a beat. He grabbed one of the fries from the basket in front of them and dipped it in ketchup.

Jimin grabbed a fry as well, “Okay, then you won’t really care when we tell you that she’s back in town?”

Yoongi’s whole being froze as Jimin’s words as he had to remind himself to breath. She was back? After being gone for 6 years, she just randomly comes back?

It sounded selfish of her to do that to him.

“She’s in town to stay, too.” Taehyung added, “But we’ll spare you the details. I just know she’s moving back in with Seokjin to help him run the shop like when you used to work there.”

Yoongi took a deep breath and then continued with eating his fry, “That’s good for her. I don’t know why I needed to know this. I don’t care whether she’s here or in Alaska feeding Polar Bears.”

“Wait-” Taehyung held up his hand, “Alaska has polar bears?”

“You need to know,” Jimin ignored Taehyung, “because I would rather you be prepared than to run into her on the street and be surprised that she’s there.”

Yoongi just shrugged, “I probably wouldn’t have even noticed if she was here. I hardly talk to Seokjin anymore, so it’s almost like him and his family are on another planet from me.”

Taehyung grabbed a fry, “You’ll be seeing her for sure. Seokjin’s new place is in our building you know.

“Sh*t,” Yoongi mumbled, “I forgot about that.”

Jimin started to feel a little worried as he watched his friend, “They’re not on the same floor as you and I, but they’ll be on the same floor as Taehyung and Jungkook… if that helps at all.”

Yoongi just shrugged, “I don’t care all that much at this point. I just want it clear that I don’t want seeing her to become often. I don’t like the idea of being around her right now.”

Taehyung nodded, “Neh, we’ve already talked about this. Even Jungkook is updated on all of this, so it shouldn’t be an issue.”

“Good,” Yoongi sighed, “The last thing I want is my past knocking on my door.”

It was roughly 9:00pm on a Wednesday night, which is when Jimin or Yoongi normally stopped by the store to get a few things for the week. It was Jimin’s week this Wednesday, which made Yoongi feel so relieved. It had been a long day at work, and the day just seemed like it was dragging on for forever. Everyone was trying to meet deadlines for tracks they were wanting reviewed, which included Yoongi.

He was tempted to do some editing even after he got home, but the couch was way too inviting for that to even be possible. He hadn’t been home for more than ten minutes before he was laying on that couch with his eyes closed, waiting for Jimin to get home with the food.

After a few minutes, there was a knock on the door. Yoongi knew it wasn’t Jimin because he wouldn’t knock, and he was too lazy to really care who else it could be.

That was until he actually opened the door and saw who was on the other side.

It was that moment when Yoongi’s own words passed through his mind, “The last thing I want is my past knocking on my door.”

When he said that, he didn’t mean it literally, but apparently, the world did.

Because the next thing he knew, he had a crying, drunk Mari sitting on his living room couch.

He didn’t know what to do in the slightest, because not only was Mari in his living room, she was also drunk and crying. Well, not only was she drunk and crying, but just the fact that she ended up there was something really confusing.

“I… I made a mistake,” she sniffed, slurring out her words, “I shouldn’t have married him, Yoongi. I shouldn’t have.”

Whoa, married? He was caught off guard at her words, but he didn’t say anything. If he did, she wasn’t in her right mind, anyway. She probably wouldn’t remember a thing by the time morning came.

Plus he didn’t even have the ability to speak at this point. The whole situation was too weird for him to process, and he didn’t like any of the thoughts he was having around her. He didn’t like seeing her in front of him again, resurfacing old feelings that he pushed out a long time ago.

“Why aren’t you saying anything?!” she suddenly cried out, which cause Yoongi to jump and his attention to move back to her. She looked horrible in her current state, and he started to feel pity for her. What could have possibly happened to her for her to end up this way?

This is your fault, Yoongi’s inner monologue started to pitch into his thoughts, if you hadn’t broken her heart those years ago, she wouldn’t have run so far away to get away from you.

He started to curse at himself in his head as he attempted to force those thoughts out of his head. It’s not his fault. He tried to apologize and she just shut him down before he could get a single word in.

“Yoongi!” Mari cried, throwing her head into her hands, “Yoongi, why did things end up this way? Why didn’t I stay here? Why did I leave you?! Why didn’t I realize the mistake in marrying someone when I knew I didn’t love them as much as I love you?!”

Yoongi swallowed his nerves and took a deep breath, trying to decide what to do. He didn’t know what to say! What do you say to a person you haven’t seen in 6 years because they ran away from you?

“Speak to me, da** it!” she let out another sob, “Don’t just watch a girl cry in front of you!”

“What do you want me to say?” Yoongi finally spoke up, causing Mari to visibly calm down. Her sobs lessened and she let out a small smile that looked funny because of her intoxication.

“I want you to say you love me, still…” she looked down at the floor and the laid down on the couch with a sigh, “I want you to save me from him. I don’t want to see him ever again. He hurt me way more than you ever could.”

Yoongi once again swallowed his nerves, but he noticed that she was falling asleep. He didn’t bother to say anything else, fearing he’d wake her up. He looked behind him to see if he had left a blanket on the back of the loveseat he was sitting on, but he didn’t see one. Sighing, he got up very quietly and retrieved a blanket from his room.

He lightly placed it over her as she lightly stirred to get more comfortable. Yoongi watched her carefully, jumping when her eyes opened and looked at him.

“Mianhae,” she slurred, “Please forgive me for what I’ve done.”

With that, she fell right asleep. She was out cold, so much so that Yoongi accidentally dropped his can of soda on the ground near her, and she didn’t flinch. Ridding of the can with a string of mumbled curses, he made his way back into his room and closed the door.

He was about to lay down in his bed and just fall asleep, cause after the night he’s had, he was more than ready for sleep. Though, in the back of his mind, he felt like staying in his room with her laying out there was rude.

He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, deciding to just sleep in the living room tonight. He’ll be woken up by Jimin to explain everything, anyway.

Sorry to leave off in a cliff hanger like that (like I haven’t already lol) but more will be posted soon! Hopefully tomorrow at 10am(CT) but no promises because it’s not finished yet...

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

-Admin Jinnie

Jerk Barista (AU!Yoongi x OC) Part 8

This one is pretty short, but I didn’t want to leave my readers without anything today, so I decided to post something today. I’m getting really close to the end (hoping to post 10 parts!) so there’s not a long wait till this is done! I’m shooting to finish this before the end of this week, but I don’t know how that’ll go ^^;

Genre: angst? not really angst, but more confusion! Words: 700+ First - Part 7 - Part 9

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

Jimin had grabbed literally all the shopping bags in one trip, as usual, and prayed the door was unlocked like it was only have the time. Lucky for him, Yoongi remembered to unlock it for him before he got home, making it easy to get in. He ran the groceries to the kitchen quickly, sighing when he was able to rest his arms.

He made his way back to the front door to close it, and made sure to lock it before turning away. He was about to head back into the kitchen, but he noticed Yoongi was sleeping on the loveseat.

“What the…” Jimin mumbled, seriously confused. If Yoongi slept in the living room, it was always on the bigger couch, so why was tonight different? Maybe he was too lazy to move something off of it?

Jimin approached the bigger couch, only to have his breath hitch in his throat. He didn’t waste a second and ran at Yoongi, shaking him furiously to wake him up. Yoongi mumbled as he hit Jimin lightly in the head for waking him up.

“Yah, what’s your problem?” He shoved Jimin off of him, “You can put the groceries away by yourself.

“Hyung, why the h*** is Mari on our couch?” he had a crazy look on his face as he asked that, but he also felt like he was going crazy with the given situation.

“I don’t know… she was drunk when she showed up.” he sighed, “Jimin, please, don’t wake her up. I’ll explain in the morning.”

“No, Hyung, we need to call Jin Hyung over here to pick her up. If she wakes up here, we both know that she’ll freak, and Jin Hyung will be mad at us for letting him worry about her.”

Jimin had a good point, but part of it made him a little more upset than he wanted. Her showing up here not only stirred a few questions in his mind, but also gave hims a little hope that she forgave him a long time ago.

Those thoughts even made himself confused and mad about why he thought them. He should be- he needed to be over her.

“Aish, do whatever,” he ended up saying, “I don’t care what you do, just let me sleep.”

Yoongi knew it was a lie, but he needed to move on. It’s been six years, and to just loop around and do the same thing over and over would drive him nuts.

“Okay…” Jimin mumbled, moving away from Yoongi, “I’m calling Jin Hyung, then.”

“You do that…” he said through his teeth, turning around to fall asleep again.

However, he couldn’t find it in him to fall asleep again.

“Hyung!” he heard Jimin whisper yell, “Omo hyung, Mari is in our apartment right now, and it looks and smells like she drank a lot.”

He couldn’t hear Seokjin’s side, but he figured he was heading up stairs to get her and carry her back down to their apartment.

“Mwoh? Really?” Jimin mumbled, “Well… what do you want me to do?”

He started to get really confused at Jimin’s words, unable to piece together what could have been said.

“Hyung… I don’t know about that. It’s too soon.”

“Aish, I know! But I don’t know what happened or what she said before she fell asleep. She was just talking to Yoongi Hyung.”

“Arraseo. I’ll tell Yoongi Hyung. Are you sure this will work out? ...Arraseo, Jin Hyung. Bye.”

Yoongi turned over to face Jimin as he send him a nervous look and a nervous laugh came from his lips.

“Jin Hyung said he’s out of town tonight, which is probably why she got drunk without him knowing or worrying about her too much.” Jimin explained, “He also said to just leave her here and talk to her in the morning, but I don’t know how well that will go over. She might even be gone before we even wake up.”

Yoongi just nodded and glanced at her before looking at Jimin again.

“But… I think you need to just sleep in your room for tonight, Hyung. You don’t want to scare her out, do you?”

Yoongi felt a sigh escape his lips and his eyes closed in frustration. He didn’t want to care about that being a possibility, but since he did, he found himself getting up and silently heading to his room.

Jimin watched his Hyung close his door, careful to not wake Mari up, and Jimin turned to her. He gave her a sympathetic look before he begrudgingly headed to put away all the groceries.

I hope this wasn’t anything disappointing... I’m trying my best to get the next part done before tomorrow! I hope everyone is enjoying this series! Though sadly, it’s coming to an end very soon :c

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-Admin Jinnie

Out Of My Mind (Namjoon x OC)

Double Upload! Woo! Fun fact- This is a fic inspired by a situation mentioned in one of my other oneshots. I loved the idea so much that I finished this fic before the one that inspired it lol

Summary: He hated to abuse her kindness like he was, but he couldn’t bring himself to change anything. It would hurt more people to change his ways than it would to keep them. Maybe.

Bless Day6 for this song that coincidentally goes along with this story!

Words: 2,500+ Genre: angst and fluff, my specialty lol

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It wasn’t too long before Namjoon pulled up to the apartment that he knew almost better than his own. He took a deep breath as he spotted movement toward the front doors of the building. He could tell her apart from a mile away.

He turned his car off and hurried out of it before she got out of his sight. She was nearly in the building when he built up the courage to shout her name out.

“Miyoung! Wait up!”

She turned around, but she didn’t necessarily look shocked. She was almost expecting to see him show up tonight. He had been staying the night almost every other night at this point.

“Namjoon,” she sent him a soft smile that was almost like a whisper. Her quiet voice took over his mind as he took another deep breath. He hated to abuse her kindness like he was, but he couldn’t bring himself to change anything. It would hurt more people to change his ways than it would to keep them.

“I’m sorry,” he slightly shrugged, but she didn’t stay to listen to his apology. She’d heard it time and time again, and there was no need to hear it once more. His footsteps followed her all the way to her place as she unlocked the door. She glanced back at him for a second before stepping inside, holding the door open for him.

“I’ll make some dinner if you’d like. I think Ryeji will be home a little early tonight,” She spoke as Namjoon slipped off his shoes. He looked over to her after shrugging his jacket off, and she sent him a soft smile. It was a smile he didn’t deserve, but she was always generous with it. He couldn’t lie that her smile could clear his head of any negative thoughts. It was the soul reason on why he should have never come.

“I’d always appreciate your food,” he spoke carefully as her eyes stayed lit up the way he liked. “But if you’re too tired to make anything, don’t force yourself.”

Miyoung took his words as a yes, and she started on her way to the kitchen, “It’ll be ready in about 30. Feel free to change and watch TV to your heart’s content.”

He wanted to walk into the kitchen and watch her cook like he always did. There was some kind of magic that she had in the kitchen, and he loved watching it. He had an excuse to keep his eyes on her for a long time, and what more could he want?

But he couldn’t do that anymore. He couldn’t do that do himself. The more he was around her, the worse things got. He shouldn’t even be here right now, but here he was.

He stared at himself in the mirror when he went to change, and his expression was just as deflated as the rest of him. He couldn’t keep this up. The more he did this, the closer Jena was to finding out.

He pushed himself away from the bathroom counter and threw the door open in frustration, but he didn’t dare let it hit the wall. Miyoung didn’t need to be anywhere near him until he calmed down a little bit.

This point is normally when he would walk into the kitchen, but Miyoung noticed him walk right on passed the doorway. He seemed to be walking into the living room, and Miyoung swallowed. Such a simple action already set her mind in a disarray as she looked back down at the food. Everything felt different, as much as she hated to admit it. He didn’t feel like his usual self. It was only a matter of time until she never saw him again.

She took a deep breath and swallowed a lump that was forming in her throat. Jena always had the upper hand. No matter what she did, he wasn’t going to leave Jena. She tried everything to win him over, but he was impenetrable.

Her thoughts wandered as her eyes stayed on the food. It didn’t matter where her eyes laid, because her mind was far gone. She couldn’t stop thinking about how he was in the other room and not in the kitchen with her.

“Namjoon,” she called once she was confident that her voice would be stable, “Do you want a drink? Coffee maybe?”

His answer didn’t come, and Miyoung felt her heart sting a little. She knew what his response would be, and unfortunately, he knew that she knew. He didn’t bother answering a question that she already knew the answer to. His answer was the same every time.

It didn’t stop her heart from aching. Even the simplest things began to hurt so much. It was a painful reminder of what was soon to come. Soon enough, she wouldn’t even be able to ask that question. It wasn’t long before he wouldn’t even show up anymore.

“Okay, I’ll get it for you,” she responded, but she didn’t move. Tears began to build up in her eyes as the TV’s volume was raised relatively louder. She took that as a sign for her to give up. She was giving up, anyway.

The food in front of her began to burn as she hurried to turn the heat down. Her arms were shaking, but she managed to save the food. If this was their last meal together, she wanted it to be great. Even if the salt from her tears made it taste a little off.

The food was finished sooner than she had hoped. Her tears were still flowing at the thoughts flooding her mind. She could barely find it in her to put the food on their separate plates. The longer he was away from her, the more desirable her bed became.

“Namjoon,” she called. Her voice sounded broken, but it was drowned out by the TV. Even if the TV was off, he wouldn’t have heard her.

She tried calling out to him again, but her voice ended up even quieter than before. She balled up her fists in frustration as her heartache grew. She might as well get used to this. Jena came first after all. She always did.

It was foolish for her to believe that his attention meant anything other than charity. To him, she was just his backup home. She was his cushion to keep him from falling when he and Jena weren’t working.

She was nothing more than his cushion, despite her hopes.

After what felt like centuries, she moved the food onto one plate for him. She was just going to hand it to him and go to bed. Their last meal was just going to have to be spent apart. She should start her heartbreak recovery as soon as possible.

She placed the pan back on the stove with the rest of the food. The longer she was around the food, the less appetizing it was. Her stomach could barely hold itself together right now, let alone digest some food.

She grabbed the plate and walked into the living room. It took all the strength left in her to put a broken smile on her face. It didn’t matter if he could see right through it. This might be the last time he sees it.

She placed the food down on the coffee table in front of him, and she felt his eyes on her. She didn’t dare look at him as she placed the water bottle that she had grabbed next to it. Her hands were shaking a lot more than she was used to.

“Sorry it took so long,” she spoke, but he could barely hear her. It didn’t help that she didn’t want to get very close to him. She wouldn’t even spare him a glance. Maybe it was for the better.

He glanced at the food that she had placed down before looking back over at her. Her eyes had rested on the TV for a few seconds, and he just watched her. He couldn’t help but study every move she made, like he was afraid he’d never see her again.

He really shouldn’t have come.

She built herself up enough to look at him as he looked her in the eyes. Her eyes told him everything he needed to know as he felt himself lose his appetite.

“I’m going to head off to bed,” she spoke, her voice breaking mid-sentence. She didn’t dare cry in front of him, so she just bowed to excuse herself. With one last look at him, she turned to walk into her room.

Namjoon couldn’t help but feel panic in his chest. His brain was confused with his actions just as much as his heart was. Jena kept popping into his mind, but as he glanced at Miyoung, he didn’t care. He couldn’t let this go on. He couldn’t cage the two of them over a girl he pitied. He’d never forgive himself if he let Jena rule his decisions.

“Miyoung,” Namjoon called as she stopped dead in her tracks. He hurried to shut off the TV as he stood up, moving closer to the girl he was hurting. He was causing her so much pain…

He knew it was time he stopped being so naive.

He rushed over to her and she turned around with tears in her eyes. Her broken expression put tears in his eyes before he had the chance to think about it. He couldn’t let this continue. She deserved to smile again. He wanted to make her smile again.

“I’m sorry,” his voice was breaking as he grabbed her hips in a desperate but gentle manor.

She dismissed his apology as her eyes got lost in his. Her mind was sending off a million alarms, but she couldn’t pull herself away from him.

He pulled her completely against him as the wind was knocked right out of her. He hadn’t ever been this close to her in all their years as friends. She had imagined this moment time and time again, but her heart still wasn’t prepared.

His nose teased hers as she reached up to wipe his tears. She didn’t know why he was crying, but she was glad she wasn’t the only one.

“I’m done,” he swallowed as he kept his eyes locked with hers. Her soft hands running along his skin made him shiver, but his tears didn’t stop, “I should have given in a long time ago.”

Not another moment was wasted as his salty lips covered hers, desperate to drink her in. He hooked his arms around her to keep her body against his. Her head tilted back slightly due to the forcefulness of his kiss. Her mind was still stuck in his eyes, even though her lids had shut ages ago.

Her desperate hands moved to his neck, running her hands through his hair at the nape. The excitement and heat of the moment had her shaking furiously, but he was doing a good job of keeping her glued to him. Her lips trembled as he changed the angle of the kiss with a light nudge of her nose. His kisses became more open as he allowed room for her to breath into the kiss. He was too hungry to let her pull away for a breath.

The wall behind her suddenly became very important to him as he hoisted her up by her thighs and lightly rammed her against the wall. A small noise left her mouth at the contact as his teeth tugged at her bottom lip. He let her feet touch the ground again, but he kept her pressed to that wall.

Her hands found the bottom of his shirt as she let her hands explore under the cloth she had imagined ripping off time and time again. Every time she had gotten a glimpse of his chest, she had hungered for a chance to touch it. The image of him emerging from the gym swimming pool came to mind as her cheeks rivaled the temperature of the sun. His built body felt better than she had ever imagined it feeling. Every muscle seemed to be at work as he kissed her, and his tongue was searching for an opportunity to dance around hers.

As her hands explored, he tried his best to keep his hands tame. His fingers pressed into her hips to keep them rooted to their spot, and he was doing well so far with self control.

It was when she let out a small sob that he pulled away and looked at her with a worried and broken expression. What had he just done? Did she just want him to leave her alone? Would she rather him have let her go?

“M-Miyoung?” his voice was hoarse from the heat of the kiss as it took everything in him to not kiss her tears away. He opted for his thumbs to clear them off, and she seemed to lean into his large hand. He noticed it almost swallowed her face now that he was able to hold her this close.

“I-I just,” she swallowed and let out a few hiccups, “I’m just so happy, but so confused.”

A small smile was placed on his face as he pulled her into a hug. She let out all the pent up tears as he moved her over to the couch.

“Take your time to calm down,” he whispered into her hair as she let out a heartbreaking sob, “I’m not going anywhere. I never really was.”

She gripped his shirt in a desperate hold, but she never said anything. His presence and comforting words were doing wonders, but her tears were unlimited. She had held them in for so long.

“N-Namjoon,” she sniffed and buried her face into his neck as his heart began racing all over again. “I love you so much…”

He placed a soft kiss on her head before running a hand up and down her back for comfort, “I know… I love you, too. I always have.”

She wanted to scream and cry at him for putting her through so much, but she couldn’t do it. No matter what kind of hell she was put through, she would do it all once more to be held like this again.

“Idiot,” was all she was able to get out as a small smile broke through on her face. He could feel the smile against his neck, so he pulled her away to look her in the eyes. His lips found her fresh tears as he kissed them away.

“The biggest idiot,” he softly corrected as her grip on his shirt tightened once more. Her eyes couldn’t believe the fond look in his eyes. She had seen that look so many times, but not once had she thought it was real.

She couldn’t help but pull him to her again, letting her heart swell. Despite the hell she went through, he was worth the wait.

AHSKAJHDAEHFOW THIS WAS SO DEPRESSING BUT YET CUTE OML I absolutely loved writing this, so much so that I wrote it all in one sitting and it is now so freaking late. Props to Day6 for the song that I listened to while writing this. I can’t quit listening to it~ cx

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-Admin Jinnie

Knives (TH x Reader feat JK)

Edit June 2020: So this started out as a oneshot that I turned into a series, but I’ve now changed it back onto a oneshot. Discontinuing a story always sucks, but since this was originally a one-off, I thought I would just return it to it’s original glory. Sorry to anyone who was enjoying the series :(

A/N: This request is so long overdue that I feel bad but I think it’s worth the wait?? When I started the story I thought it was mediocre, but I fell in love with it once I sat down to try and finish it. Please cry with me.

Request: Can you do a fanfic where you and Jungkook are engaged and on your anniversary he cheats with your sister and you go to Tae for comfort?

Summary: It was never a good feeling to realize that someone has been cheating on you, but to find out that it was my sister that he was cheating with was crushing. Thank God for Taehyung, because I wasn’t sure how I would get through this without him.

6.2k words | angst ✞ | fluff ♡

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My breathing had felt a little irregular today ever since I woke up this morning. It was my anniversary with my fiance; an occasion that was usually happy. I had been with him for four years and engaged to him for one, so nothing should be causing me to feel this anxious.

I just couldn’t forget the unfamiliar smell on his clothes as I was doing our laundry. It was a perfume I didn’t own, but I was surely overreacting. He has a sister who he talks to regularly, as do I. He might have been hanging with one of our sisters or something. Nothing to be worried about.

“Hey,” his voice caused me to jump as I threw his shirt into the laundry, “Don’t forget that tonight you’re supposed to wear the lingerie I got you.”

His arms snaked around my waist as I smelled his familiar cologne. That’s what his shirt should have smelled like. It shouldn’t have smelled like peaches.

“Of course, Kookie,” I smiled and looked back at him. He played with the ring on my finger before pulling his arms from around me. He gave me a short kiss on the lips and turned to head out of the room.

I felt very uneasy for the rest of the day. I was second guessing everything around me; I was doubting his “mandatory meeting” that he said was today. It was the only reason I was spending our anniversary with his friend Taehyung instead of my fiance.

“Peaches, Tae,” I opened the can of Dr. Pepper in my hand before I held it out to him. I had Jungkook’s shirt laying on our coffee table as a skeptical Taehyung sniffed it. “I don’t even like the smell of peaches. This is not from me.”

He just laid the shirt back on the table and took a sip of the can I just handed him. “Do you know who he works with? Any females?”

I swallowed and shrugged, taking a seat next to him. He was giving me a concerned look that made me feel all the more paranoid.

“I don’t know. He wouldn’t do that to me. We’re supposed to get married once we agree on a wedding date…” I trailed off as my eyes started to form tears. Everything he’d ever said and done to me was now being analyzed by my brain, and it was too much to handle.

“You know, I’m calling up my sister,” I mumbled as Taehyung patted my leg for comfort. His touch was very reassuring to my furiously beating heart, but my mind was still on fire.

The phone rang several times before she actually picked up. I was just happy she actually picked up the phone. Sometimes when I needed boy advice from her, she was always unavailable.

“Hey Ren!” I tried to sound like I wasn’t freaking out on the inside.

“Hey, Y/N,” she took a deep breath into the phone, “What advice do you need now? If he doesn’t think your moves are sexy by now, he probably never will.”

I tried to laugh off her remark, but she didn’t laugh with me. “I just really need your advice. Jungkook’s shirt from yesterday smells like a peach perfume, but I don’t have anything that smells like that.”

“So you’re paranoid?” now she was laughing, but I didn’t find this funny at all. For the first time in all of our relationship, Jungkook has shown signs of secrecy, and now he smells like another girl.

“It’s not funny, Ren,” I swallowed and looked over to Taehyung. He was smelling the shirt with a fixated look on his face. It was almost like he was figuring something out, which excited me to see.

“Okay, let me ease your suspicions. Jungkook and I ran into each other yesterday and I hugged him. It’s my perfume that you smell.”

“Thank God,” I spoke as her words let me unwind. I felt all my muscles relax at her words as a genuine smile was placed on my face. “I was seriously worried. You know, he’s been very distant with me the past few weeks. It’s good to know he wasn’t doing anything behind my back.”

“Yeah, look Y/N, I’m a little busy with stuff-”

It was then that the sound of a door opening was sent through the phone. Ren hissed something that was hard to figure out as a man’s voice was sent through the receiver.

“Hey Ren, I brought some wine from work-”

Some shushing could be heard coming from my sister as I could feel my muscles go rigid once more. Every fiber of my being was now on edge as my brain tried to deny what my ears were telling me.

“Renhi,” I spoke, but before I could say another word, she cut me off.

“I’m sorry Y/N, I’ve gotta go. Kids can’t babysit themselves!”

The line went dead as I balled up my fist, fingernails digging into my skin.

“Babysitting with wine? Like hell...”

Taehyung turned to me, but I sprang up from the couch before he could even think about it.

“Y/N, is everything alright?”

I grabbed my purse and slipped on some tennis shoes I kept by the door. Taehyung’s keys were laying in the place where Jungkook normally kept his, and I grabbed them without even thinking.

“You’re driving me to my sister’s.”

::

Taehyung was begging me to say something the whole ride to my sister’s, but my mind was blank. If a thought crossed through my mind, my heart fought it away. My body was having a fight with itself, and all that was left was my shell being knocked around by Taehyung’s car.

“We’re here,” his hand rested on my thigh as I placed my cold hand on top of his. My eyes scanned the parking lot of the complex, hand shivering in Taehyung’s.

I was just trying to get rid of the doubts in my mind. I didn’t think I would see anything. I didn’t think that Jungkook had really ditched me on our anniversary to have wine with my married sister. It was impossible.

My free hand grabbed my phone as I searched through my phone for Jungkook’s contact. I was wrong. I was just being paranoid. It’s not just Jungkook that drives a red 2015 Toyota Camry…

“Hey Y/N! You caught me right before the meeting,” he sounded so cheery which made it all the more unsettling.

“Meeting?” I swallowed and decided to play on with his charade, “Will there be wine at this meeting? Pretty girls? An apartment complex?”

The line was silent for way too long as my cold hands were now like ice. Even the hand Taehyung was trying to keep warm was frozen. Why was he being so quiet? This is when he laughs and proves my suspicions wrong. He wouldn’t cheat on me, not after everything we’d been through together.

“That would be a weird meeting,” was all he said after the long pause. I felt my heart harden as he took a deep breath, “It’s just a normal office meeting. I’ll see you at home tonight, okay babe?”

“Okay,” I nodded and felt tears sting in my eyes, “Tell the kids I said hi.”

“What?” Jungkook didn’t hesitate to answer to those words. I could hear panic in his voice as my heart felt it was a victory. “What kids? Who’s kids? Is everything okay?”

It took me a few seconds to understand what exactly he was thinking I meant when I said what I did. I simply was referring to the kids at Ren’s apartment even though there clearly weren’t any…

But a broken and bitter smile appeared on my face as his panic was apparent.

“Yours.”

I hung up the phone before he could say a word, and I was left in a silent car with a confused Taehyung sitting next to me. I didn’t doubt that he was piecing everything together, especially when we both spotted Jungkook running out of the very apartment that I was afraid he was in.

“Taehyung, take me home,” I spoke as Jungkook ran down the stairs of the complex and headed to his car, “Yours, not mine. I’ll get my stuff when I know he won’t be home.”

He complied with my demands as he let go of my cold hand to put the car in reverse. We were out of the area and at Taehyung’s place in less than five minutes, but I wasn’t ready to get out of the car. I wasn’t ready to completely accept the fact that the chances of Jungkook cheating on me with my sister were higher than his chances of marrying me.

“Y/N…” Taehyung’s hand grabbed mine after a full minute of silence. I tried to get him to head inside, but he refused. He wouldn’t let go of my hand even if I threatened him.

“It’s not good for you to think about it,” he was soft and quiet as my heart broke all over again. I couldn’t help but be reminded that all the sweet nothings Jungkook had said to me weren’t sweet nothings. They were just nothing.

“Taehyung, I’m sorry… I-” I hiccuped from the tears that began flowing down my face. My unmoving self had now turned into a blubbering mess, and Taehyung was caught in the middle of it.

Was it unfair to drag Jungkook’s best friend into this? Sure Taehyung and I are really close as well, but Jungkook was friends with him first.

Even as I thought of other people I could try and call to comfort me and give me a place to stay, I realized this was all I had. My other options were Jungkook’s sister or mine.

And my sister was the cause of all of this to begin with.

I looked over at Taehyung and his eyes caught hold of my wet and watery ones. My makeup was running and my lip was quivering like never before. His eyes never changed from being soft and comforting as his free hand reached up to wipe what he could of my tears. He didn’t try and push me to say or do anything as we sat there in the car, frozen in time.

His touch put my heart at ease as my tears calmed down slightly. He leaned in to place a soft kiss on my forehead as my eyes closed. He tried to pull his lips off my skin, but I leaned into him to savor the moment. Every bit of his skin on mine was calming me down, making me forget about my worries. He was like alcohol for my system except without the embarrassing videos and horrible hangovers.

“If we go inside, will you just hold me in your arms?”

It was a strange thing to request of him, but he didn’t protest. I think he was just happy that I was going inside after what felt like ages of sitting in the car.

The inside of his place was just like I remembered it when Jungkook and I last came to visit. It was supposed to be the two of us and Taehyung with his new girl. When we showed up that night, there was no girl. She broke up with him the night before, and he didn’t have the heart to cancel the plans. He told us that he needed us to be there for him.

And now it was just the two of us. No Jungkook.

My heart hurt at the thought of his name. His face was getting permanently burned into my eyes, but I didn’t want to think about him.

I quit admiring the place I hadn’t seen in so long as I pulled Taehyung to the couch and sat us both down. He seemed to feel a little reluctant or uncomfortable once we were sitting on the couch. We were sitting closer to each other than we had ever been.

He switched on the TV as I made myself at home in his arms. His right arm was wrapped around me as I leaned into his chest. His heat and heartbeat seemed to put me at ease, and his smell filled my nose more than any other smell. I didn’t bother looking to see his facial expressions to everything that I was doing, but I was sure that he was fine. He was still my friend, and he used to tell me that he would be willing to do anything for me.

Even if this was crossing a boundary, I was willing to deal with the repercussions. I’d never felt more comforted just by someone’s touch. I didn’t even have time to think of Jungkook and our fake children as I laid in Taehyung’s arms and counted the freckles on his arms. His heartbeat lulled me to close my eyes and relax my shoulders. I moved my right hand to find his left hand, and without saying a word, I intertwined my finger’s with his. His heartbeat jumped slightly at the contact as the beating was a little faster than it previously was. He didn’t seem to have a problem with the gesture, though, because he just tightened his grip on my hand for a few seconds. It was like a reassuring squeeze.

“You should sleep,” he whispered into my ear as a shiver was sent through my body. I smiled and nodded with my eyes closed, but the feeling of my phone vibrating in my pocket scared me awake slightly.

Without warning, Taehyung reached into my back pocket and took my phone out, turning it off before letting me see what was sent.

“It’s not good to read any of his or her messages. Right now it’s just about you and me and resting for a little while.” he nodded as I didn’t protest. I couldn’t say that I was willing to protest too much to him. He was so soft about everything and it made it hard to refuse what he was saying.

With another little nod and a small smile, I closed my eyes and settled into the arms of my fiance’s best friend. The only thing keeping me awake was the thought of how Taehyung’s arms felt more comforting than Jungkook’s arms ever felt.

::

By the time I woke up, Taehyung was long gone. I opened my eyes slightly and sat up from the position that Taehyung had laid me down in. I could hear him in the kitchen when he closed the fridge, and I took a deep breath. I wished that I didn’t remember the events that led me to this situation, but as Taehyung walked into the living room, it hit me all at once.

Jungkook followed behind him into the living room as I felt myself involuntarily tense. I curled my knees into myself as Taehyung sent me a sorry look. I didn’t have the energy to be mad at him. All my negative energy was being sent to Jungkook.

I didn’t dare look in Jungkook’s eyes as he sat very close to me. The couch suddenly felt very suffocating as his eyes stayed glued to me. I could almost feel his worry, and that alone made me sick to my stomach.

He’s just here because he thinks I’m pregnant. I kind of wished I hadn’t lead him to believe that… it just hurts more not knowing if he would feel the same kind of regret if I hadn’t lied.

“How long have you known?” his voice sounded tired and worried as I felt my nausea double. He’s only here because of my lie. There was nothing to convince me otherwise.

I didn’t bother responding as I rested my forehead on my knees. I felt like shriveling up into nothing as I felt Jungkook’s hand on my shin. His touch had changed from the comforting and heart racing feeling. It was now a burning sensation deep in my chest, and I felt like I was being violated by the simple action.

“God, Y/N… I feel like an asshole,” he gulped and moved his hand up and down. There was no more sense of comfort; just an agonizing, heartbreaking ache. I was dying to shove his hand off, but I didn’t have the strength to. I didn’t want him to roughly grab me if I grew violent with him.

He’s only saying that. My heart was barely keeping up as my brain continued to think a million heartbreaking thoughts.

“I can’t tell you how God damn sorry I am,” he continued to talk as I felt my pain worsening. I keep thinking that I couldn’t feel any worse, but with every word he says, the pain finds a way to become more intolerable. “I swear that it didn’t happen often. It was just a time or two-”

“Stop,” I snapped as my voice spoke before my brain had the chance to filter anything, “Just stop talking Jungkook. You’re making everything worse.”

He moved his hand to my arm as tears immediately began pouring from my eyes. Everything just wouldn’t stop hurting.

I shoved his hand off as I shrunk even more into myself. I was already gasping for air from the tears that were pouring from my eyes, and I didn’t dare look up. Seeing his face any more than I had to would stop my heart for sure.

“I just want to make this work,” he spoke in a gentle voice as I balled up my fists, “We just need to set a wedding date and have some counseling and everything will be fine-”

I couldn’t take it anymore as I stood up from the couch and moved away from Jungkook. I didn’t look his way, but I looked to Taehyung with a slight glare. It was half hearted because it was all I could muster through the tears, “Why did you let him in?”

I didn’t give Taehyung a chance to respond as I rushed off to Taehyung’s room. Jungkook was quick to rush after me, which was more than terrifying to me. I knew he would have no problem catching me before I could close and lock the door.

I grabbed onto the wall as I tried to make a quick turn, but Jungkook not only had a speed advantage, but he had his shoes on to keep him stable. His arms were around my torso before I could officially get around the corner, and I felt myself fall limp in his arms. It just kept getting worse and worse and worse and so much worse.

He fell to the floor with me as he pulled me to sit in his lap. He was trying to comfort me with his touch as he placed a kiss to the top of my head. Tears didn’t fail to blur my vision as I kept gasping for air. I couldn’t keep up with what was tears and what was snot as I just wiped my face into my shirt and kept it to cover my face from his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he spoke into my ear as I started to squirm away from him. He was much much stronger than me, and once I started to try and push him away, he just pulled me back into his arms.

“Jungkook, just let me go,” I begged, but he shook his head against my back.

“No, I can’t let you go,” he spoke against me as I continued to try and get away from him, “You can hit me and scream at me all you want over what I’ve done. I’m not trying to defend myself, but I’m begging you to forgive me.”

“Jungkook,” my voice rose a little as he just shook his head.

“I love you, Y/N. I can’t let you raise our child on your own. I want to be there for you and our child-”

“Jungkook, I’m not pregnant.”

He grew still against me as I felt his grip on me loosen. Everything he did was just adding and adding to the stabbing pains in my heart. I couldn’t help but think that this was all over the fake baby… He didn’t actually truly mean all of those words, he only meant them if I was pregnant.

I was able to fight my way out of his arms as I continued my march to Taehyung’s room. Every step I took added more resentment toward him as I wiped the tears off my face. As I got to the entrance of the room, I willed myself to turn around and look at Jungkook in the eyes. Worry, sorrow, and pain were all I could see in him, but I was already at my max of how incredibly horrible I could feel. It was like I was building a wall around myself without even realizing it.

“You only want all those things if I’m pregnant. Please stop wasting my time.”

I stepped inside and felt my heart jump as Jungkook started getting up off the floor. I saw him starting to run in my direction as I quickly slipped into the room and locked the door. I heard him slam against the door as his voice started to cry out to me.

I felt my tears pouring from my eyes, wetting my face that I had just wiped off. Every time he beat his fist against the door was another stab. All the stabs were starting to feel the same, and dare I say that they were starting to feel normal. I was starting to get used to it. It was like I was Jungkook’s target for knife practice, and I was becoming okay with it.

“Y/N, please,” I could hear him sniff as another knife was thrown, “It was an accident. It only happened three times.”

There went another one.

“She asked me how things were in bed with you because you always ask her for advice. I told her that you were getting better, and she offered to show me what it would feel like if you could actually pull them off.”

That one felt more like ten different knife wounds, but who’s counting at this point? My whole heart was practically made of knives at the moment.

“I gave in to her but I’ve felt so terrible about it. I was going over there today to tell her that it was wrong for us to be doing that to you. I asked her to forget about everything. I was ready to go home and talk about setting a wedding date with you.”

I laid on Taehyung’s bed as Jungkook continued to break my heart through the door. He wouldn’t stop talking as my tears were becoming sobs. I wanted to open the door and just forgive him, but life just wasn’t that simple. Even if I forgave him, I could never feel the same. He’s broken me beyond repair to ever be able to truly love him again. I was afraid that I wouldn’t even be able to love anyone again.

“I want to get married to you, I want to have kids with you, Y/N! I want to spend the rest of my life by your side-”

“Jungkook, please stop,” I called out through my pitiful sobs, “It’s not going to happen. I’ll never be able to forgive you. Your presence and your touch are just painful to me now, and I don’t think that will change.”

My words seemed to render him speechless. He quit beating on the door, and all I could hear from his side were sniffs. I curled myself into a ball as I hugged one of Taehyung’s pillows into my stomach. I buried my face into it and tried to fill all my senses with Taehyung instead of Jungkook.

“...Could you please open the door? I don’t want things to end this way,” he pitifully asked through the door as I let out a broken and sob filled laugh. Once the laugh started, I couldn’t get it to stop. I was afraid that I had finally gone insane as I just sat with my face in Taehyung’s pillow, both crying and laughing so hard that I could barely breath. I started to cough as I choked on some of the snot that had built up in my system, but I was just thankful that I quit laughing.

“Things are ending this way. I’m sorry Jungkook. Just leave me alone.”

My words once again rendered him speechless, but he beat his fist onto the door. I felt myself jump at the action as I heard his soft sobs through the door. From the sound of it, he was just as broken as I felt.

All the knives that were stabbed into me were suddenly pushed deeper as I felt my breathing become irregular. My feelings for Jungkook were crying out for me to just unlock the door and hug him to me, but I couldn’t. This just wasn’t a fairytale…

“Why’d you go to Taehyung of all people…” he sobbed into the door as I tried to ignore him, “Am I going to lose both my best friend and the love of my life all at once?”

I just continued to cry as he sniffed and hit his fist against the door again.

“I’m such an asshole, but do I really deserve to lose both of you?”

I didn’t respond to his words, but I was surprised to hear Taehyung’s voice answer for me.

“Yeah, you kind of do.”

The air was completely silent after he spoke, and I felt my heart remove a few of the knives. I had almost forgotten that Taehyung was even here.

I heard rampant footsteps moving away from the door as I realized Jungkook was moving away from the only exit I had. I sat up, suddenly very alert of what was going on outside the room.

A sound of flesh colliding with flesh was heard as my eyes widened and my feet flew to the door. I swung the now unlocked door open as I saw Taehyung holding his face with both of his hands. Thank God Jungkook just punched him in the eye and not the nose. If he had broken his nose, I think I would have lost my mind having to go to the hospital right now.

“Jungkook what the hell?” I spoke as he looked back at me. He was crying as he looked at me with rage in his eyes. He looked very unstable, and for once, I was actually scared of him and what he might do to me. I was ready to run back into Taehyung’s room if Jungkook took one more step closer.

“I knew you weren’t just nice to her because she’s my fiance,” he turned back to Taehyung as Taehyung took one step away from Jungkook, “You like her more than you like me. I always knew… but thank you for confirming it. I guess bros over hoes doesn’t apply to you.”

“Jungkook, please leave,” he spoke as he took another step back. Instead of charging for him like I was afraid he was doing, he just ran past Taehyung and toward the front door. His keys sounded through my mind as the door opened and closed before I had a chance to breathe again.

It was the end of my fairytale life with Jungkook and the beginning of the real world. I was completely and utterly terrified of what life had for me after this.

::

Taehyung was more that welcome to have me move into his place after I had found the time to pack all my stuff from Jungkook and my old place. I moved into the room next to his and he was good to leave me alone for a few days.

It took me a good two months before I was finally able to smile and laugh with Taehyung again. He was patient with me when I would occasionally get upset, and he was very understanding of my feelings.

It wasn’t until a full year had past that I felt like I was truly getting over Jungkook. I had cut all contact with him since I gave him back the engagement ring he had given me once upon a time. I also didn’t speak to my sister ever again, even when she would try and call or text me. It all started with her, after all.

Taehyung was good about getting me to leave the house and do something, and he even convinced me to get a brand new job and a fresh start. He helped me study for a million different interviews and he was even willing to go out and help me find a new wardrobe to wear.

It wasn’t long before all traces of the person I used to be were just an element of the past.

Taehyung and I had decided to go grab some food as I agreed to actually go and sit down with him. Before, when I didn’t want to leave the house, I just asked him to pick it up to take home to me. I bet he was relieved that I was willing to finally go eat with him because he hated being cramped in his house all the time.

“I’m glad that you’re finally willing to come eat with me,” he said after we finished ordering, “I feel like I know all your orders, likes and dislikes because of how much food I’ve picked up for you.”

I just laughed and placed my hand on the table, “I’m sorry, but I’m feeling so much better. It’s like you lifted a weight off my shoulders. Like you pulled out all the knives stabbing my heart back then.”

He just sent me a soft smile as his hand rested on mine. I felt my breath shorten at the contact, but I didn’t dwell on it. I just continued to look at him and talk to him about my day and things I learned about my new coworkers.

“Thank you, Taehyung,” I felt myself saying after we finished laughing at a joke he made, “Thank you for being there for me all this time. For the longest time, I felt horrible for taking you away from Jungkook… but I’m feeling selfish now. I’d never let him take you back in a million years.”

Taehyung just laughed as he rested his elbows on the table and leaned forward a little bit.

“If I could make the choice over again, I’d still pick you,” he confessed as I felt my heart jump a little, “What he did was so inexcusable. I was mad at him almost as much as you were, if not more so.”

“Probably more so,” I shrugged, “I never really got mad at him, I was just upset. Anger was just a secondary emotion. To be honest, the angriest I’ve ever been at him was when he punched you that day.”

It felt weird to admit it, but Taehyung seemed interested in what I had just said. I had never actually admitted it out loud, but Taehyung’s heroisms were enough for my heart to grow attached to him. I was afraid that I would never love anyone again because of how Jungkook broke me, but I warmed up to Taehyung decently fast.

It only took a year and a half from Jungkook and I’s break up for me to realize that I had fallen in love with Taehyung. He was everything that I loved in Jungkook, but he was more honest and loving than Jungkook was. We aren’t even together and I felt more love from Taehyung than I had anyone else.

“You know…” Taehyung spoke as I snapped out of my thoughts, “I’ve been dying to talk to you about this for so long, but I’ve been afraid of what you’d say.”

I raised my eyebrows and I sat up a little straighter. He let out a small laugh at my eager look as I smiled with him.

“Jungkook mentioned that I liked you more than him back then… I had to commend him for being vague and not exposing me to you in that moment. I think he really did mean all the words he said that night, but the kid needed a wake up call. I think you gave that to him.”

I couldn’t help but feel just a little guilty about leaving Jungkook alone in the world. He may have deserved it, but I didn’t have any ill will toward him. I couldn’t help but hope that he had moved on in the world like I had with Taehyung.

I snapped back to the real world as I looked into Taehyung’s eyes, “What do you mean by exposing you?”

Taehyung took a deep breath and gave me a nervous smile, and I found it cute to see he was also a little embarrassed.

“I’ve liked you for… a very long time,” he confessed as my eyes widened, but I didn’t look away from his eyes, “I don’t know when I started liking you, but I never dared to act on it when you were with Jungkook.”

I felt a giggle in my throat as I placed my hand on the table face up for him to grab. He looked down at it and grabbed it with certainty before looking back into my eyes.

“I didn’t plan on ever telling you, but fate placed you in my care to nurse you back to the person that I fell in love with.”

I couldn’t help but smile and swallow down some emotional tears as I squeezed his hand. I felt paranoia fill my brain as one thought crossed my mind:

It felt like a fairytale.

But this time, it felt real. The fairytale I was in with Jungkook was a world full of oblivion and secrets, but this one felt real and genuine. He did, after all, stick with me through two agonizing years, and he refused to give up on me.

I felt a tear slip through as I looked down at our hands. He gave me a reassuring squeeze as I wiped away the tear with my free hand.

“I fell in love with you along this ride,” I spoke as my eyes locked onto his once more, “And I have no doubt in my mind about you. I have no fears or PTSD over the past relationship I had when it comes to you. I trust you with my life.”

His smile matched mine as our waiter finally came to the table with our food. I laughed as Taehyung listed off my order along with the waiter who seemed very confused on why he had done that.

As I picked up my fork and stabbed it into my food, I found my eyes trailing to someone past Taehyung. I didn’t let my mind dwell on how much of a coincidence it was that Jungkook ended up at the same restaurant as us on my first night eating out again with Taehyung. I felt my heart jump at the sight of him in the distance, and when I noticed that he was with some friends he had made in the past two years, I smiled. He seemed to be having a good time, smiling and laughing. I couldn’t help but smile with him up until his eyes locked onto mine.

I saw him freeze in his seat as our eyes made contact, and I kept telling myself to look away. I was terrified that he would start feeling worse seeing not only me, but also Taehyung out and holding hands with smiles on our faces.

Taehyung seemed to notice that I was focused on someone behind him as he glanced over his shoulder and saw Jungkook looking at us.

It took a few seconds before Jungkook even moved after seeing us, and once he did, he sent the two of us a genuine smile. Relief rushed through me as I smiled and waved at him, thanking the heavens that he seemed to have gotten over the situation.

“Are you okay?” Taehyung spoke as he looked back at me, but I just smiled and squeezed his hand.

“I’m just happy that everyone ended up happy,” I answered before letting go of Taehyung’s hand and chewing on the food I just placed into my mouth. Jungkook went back to talking to his two friends about something before looking back over at me every once and a while. Part of me hoped that he would walk over to the two of us and say hi, but as he and his friends got up and walked out of the building, I accepted what I got.

Taehyung walked off to pay as I headed outside the building to get some fresh air. It had seemed like forever since I had actually gone out and done things other than work, and it felt great to finally live again.

I stretched my arms out to pop a few of my bones, and as I did so, I felt my hand knock into someone. I looked over to them and was about to apologize, but I stopped short when my eyes met Jungkook’s soft ones.

I couldn’t help but feel slightly uneasy as my eyes looked into his. Some old feelings were starting to come back, and I couldn’t lie, it was scaring me.

“Hey. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

::

A/N: AHH OMG THIS STORY BROKE MY HEART YOU GUYS. I have been trying to finish this request for so freaking long and now that it’s over I feel so sad. I wanted to end it sad, but I just left it open for people to scream at me and hate me because I hate myself a little right now ahhhHHHH

Please send an ask for compliments or criticism plz, or to yell at me like I’m yelling at me

⇨ Masterlist ⇦

-Zelee

Devotion (M)

Word Count: 5,885 // angst (toxic relationship, friends to lovers, yandere behavior, possessiveness, jealousy, mention of physical harm, mention of neglect), smut (rough sex/slight dub-con, fingering, omorashi, asphyxiation, forced creampie), no fluff

Childhood friend!Taehyung X Childhood friend!Reader

Summary: You and Taehyung were inseparable once. When you come back to your hometown after three years, fate pulls you back to him. And this time, Taehyung won’t ever keep his eyes off of you. 

Music: X

Keep reading

cherry blossom avenue.

❀ genre: angst/fluff; arranged marriage!au; f2l!au;

❀ pairing: jin x reader; 

❀ length: 23.0k;

❀ synopsis: college would’ve been unbearable if it weren’t for your wallowing sessions with your best friend jin over a shared “forever alone” woe, so it really was only a matter of time until the two of you sealed a shoddy promise to betroth the other at the age of 27. perhaps it was only a silly joke to you then, but you should’ve known better nonetheless; because when a wedding invitation arrives five years later down the road with his name signed next to another’s, feelings that were once buried begin to blossom once again.

“Don’t be a homewrecker.”

What was supposed to be a light-hearted tease over your fleeting glimpses in his direction bears much more weight than even reality should have; and unbeknownst to her, even if your friend’s commentary strikes a fear in you, a fear that has some creature eating away at you and a horrifying drop in the twisted pain of your chest, the daunting knowledge of a potential truth behind her words pale in comparison to the anguish brought upon by a familiar face of the past. 

Keep reading

A Night With a Vampire - Part 1 (m)

— pairing | Kim Taehyung /Reader

— word c | 6,305

— genre | Vampire! Taehyung, Slightly angst. Smut. 

— summary | The end of the relationship leaves you lost and totally sad. Your friend is having a party and you promised you would. You just did not know that your life would change from there.

— warnings/tags | Bad words, Oral (female receiving). Explict sex.

‘Part 1′ | Part 2 

9:30 p.m. - Friday.

“Get up, (Y/N)!" It was the thousandth time Jimin was knocking at my door. Holy shit, I cannot even sleep in this house anymore! My wristwatch marked nine-thirty at night. Today is Friday and I'm lying under my covers. I have no reason to leave here. My 4-year-old date ended a few days ago and I'm not in the mood to do anything at all. It was amazing to see the guy I loved saying that I wasn’t good enough for him anymore and that he was not interested in me anymore. Shit. I think a shotgun shot in my face would hurt less than that. “(Y/N)! Don’t make me break this door!” Jimin was my best friend and roommate. We were doing fashion college together. College which was a four hour drive, since in the city where we live it doesn’t have support for a college building or for a decent shopping mall.

Jiminie was always with me in all my fights with Lil and it was he who lent me a shoulder to cry on. How stupid of me … I've lost four years of my life with a guy, to get here and get a foothold in the ass, days before I graduated from college.

"(Y/N), I'll count to three, if you don’t open this fucking door …"

"I'm coming, Jiminie!" I yelled as I kicked the covers and got out of bed. That sucks. "What is it?" I asked, opening the door. I was surprised to see how he was dressed. "What ... Why are you dressed as Lord Voldemort?"

"Millena's fancy party is today, have you forgotten?"

"No, I didn’t, and I'm not going!" I spoke back to my bed and lay down again. Millena was our friend. She was also our classmate. Her parties are the most popular in the city because even in a city small as Forty City, there are not many people who can hold a party at the level of the festivals of big cities like New York and Las Vegas. She and Jimin had an overwhelming passion about two years, they dated, but they preferred to stay as friends. And that's why Jimin lives with me, he thought if he lived with her, they would probably fuck 24 hours a day.

"Is it because of Lil?" He asked sitting down on the edge of the bed. I nodded. "It's been a week, (Y / N) ..." A week? I'm worse than I thought. "You need to snap out of it. It’s over. End.”

"I already know that, Jimin." I said without any animation in my voice and I tucked my head under the pillow.

"Come on, princess?!" He pulled back the pillow and made me look at him. “You need to have fun. And Millena will be very upset if you don’t go to her last party in town, don’t forget that in five days we're going to Los Angeles. "

"What if he's there?"

"You're ignore him, you're 23. You're a beautiful woman, you can get any guy you want at this party."

"I will not have sex with a guy, a week after the end of my relationship.”

"You’re silly, I know Lil took about three girls just yesterday!" He said coolly. That actually hurt like a slap in the face.  “We're planning on going to this party for weeks, (Y/N) ...”

What now? What do I do? What if I go to this party and Lil is getting another girl? How will I react? But what if I do not go and Millena gets mad at me? After all, I promised her I would come to this party and I already bought the costume. Should I go or stay here lamenting the end of my relationtship?

Jimin pouted... I hate when he does that! I always do everything he asks me when he pouts.

“Give me a few minutes. I'll get dressed.” I said with a half smile, watching his face light up and a huge smile appear. Before I could continue what I was talking about, Jiminie jumped on top of me, hugging me tight. Lord, when did he get so heavy? Are the muscles or hamburgers we always eat after we leave college?

"I'll wait for you in the living room. Don’t take too long or I'll take you there, naked!" He said and left jumping out of bed and before closing the door, he sent me a kiss.

That's it! Come on, (Y / N)... You can do it. I got up and walked dragged into the bathroom of my room. When I enter, I get scared when I look in the mirror. Holy shit, I'm horrible! My hair is a bushel, my eye pencil is blurred. I look like a beggar with nightwear rumpled.

Here we go…

I turned on the shower and pulled out my clothes, tossing them into a corner of the bathroom. I stepped under the warm water and closed my eyes as the water poured down my body. This should be the final cleaning. The water and the soap were wiping away all the fingerprints Lil had left on me when he touched me. All the touches were being removed by this water. I'm not the girl to whine about the spilled milk. I'm an attitude girl and that's what I have to remember today.

I opened my eyes, determined to use this party to forget the four years I spent dedicating myself to someone who would end with me near one of the most important days of my life. Something tells me that tonight is going to be the best of all.

After the shower, I wrapped my hair in the towel and went out to get my fantasy inside the closet. After I put her to bed, I grabbed a black lingerie in the drawer of the dresser, already wearing it. Black has always been my favorite color. And when I combine it with red I am even happier to have chosen it as my favorite color. I feel so exaggeratedly well with these two colors!

I took the towel from my hair and turned on the dryer to see if I could get a handle on that mane. Particularly, I liked my hair, I only hated it when it was too rebellious.

Some time later, I finished drying it and put on my costume. Vampire!

I never understood why I'm so crazy about vampires. No, I'm not talking about Twilight, I'm talking about Dracula. I'm literally crazy about movies where there are those fucking sexy leeches. Jimin thinks I'm crazy to think a vampire is sexy, he always says, ‘If these things existed for real you would not even want to get close to them, you would want to run away before he bit you’ But, I think if vampires existed for real, I would not be afraid of them. And I just want to be bitten by one. But it's all science fiction, that is, I will never know the feeling of being bitten by a vampire.

I looked in the mirror, finishing the makeup, basic thing. A blush, not too exaggerated black shade, mascara and an eyeliner to mark the eyes. I'm ready.

...

10:15 p.m. - Millena’s house.

"You arrived!" Millena ran up to me with open arms and jumped onto my neck before throwing herself over Jiminie. She was wearing a short white dress, clinging to her legs, she was a nurse. I'm not much surprised by this choice of fantasy, Millena always said that if she were not Fashion Designer, she would be a doctor. "I thought you wouldn’t come! In fact, you are magnificent with these fantasies."

"And we almost didn’t even come. (Y / N) didn’t want to get out of bed."

"But since Jimin is annoying, he knocked on my door, threatening to break it, and I was forced to open it." I turned irritated to him who raised his arms in surrender. "Where are the drinks?"

"This way."

We headed into Millena's two-story house. It was probably the biggest house in town. Her parents owned a branch of fashion stores that was spread throughout the world. They were in India now, signing another contract for another new branch there. I don’t even talk about my parents. They wanted me to be a lawyer, but fashion interests me more than defending those I know to be guilty. But when I chose what I wanted to do, they were understandable. Thank God! They even helped me with tuition.

As we walked to a place near the stairs where there was a table full of drinks and snacks, after all, an empty bag cannot stand upright, even more if that bag got drunk without having eaten anything, I observed the decoration of the house. Style "Murder House", there were pumpkins everywhere, black hearts balloons, decorative ribbons fluorescent and neon. Two globes of light hanging next to the $ 4,500 chandelier that Millena's mother bought at a store in Spain. The music it played was a kind of pop / electronic, the beat was strong and we could feel the ground shaking beneath our feet. The good part about living in a small town is that no neighbor can call the cops complaining about the loud sound, because the whole city is in here.

"Here!" She said handing me a glass with a red liquid inside. At the same time I took it, turned it over and swallowed all, feeling my throat burn. Fucking hell, now I get drunk.

"Slow down (Y / N)". Jimin said with a laugh. Only he knows how I get when I drink too much.

I was ready to go to the dance floor and forget that Lil once existed, when something made me look at the back of the room and I came across a man. He had one of his arms propped against the wall, a little above his head while talking to a girl. I found myself mesmerized. His black hair was a little below the nape of the neck and completely flat. I could not see his face completely, I just noticed the tone of his skin and wondered if it was as silky as it looked. He was wearing a black overcoat, his pants seemed to be the same color while wearing bad boy style boots.

"Who is he?" I asked Millena who was next to me, drinking something.

"He's my brother's friend. I don’t remember his name." she spoke and shortly after took a sip of the drink in her glass and reached for me.

"He's in college?" I asked trying to know if I had seen him around here. But of course her answer was no, because even if I had seen him before, I would remember. "Does he live here?"

"No. He's just spending some time here. My brother said he has a beach house in Los Angeles."

"Interesting." That was the only thing I said. Then I took a sip of Millena's drink and handed it to her. There was something about him that caught my eye, something I'd never seen in another guy, but it was hard to know what it  when all the lights flickered, making me a little dizzy.

Then he turned. He turned to me. Even I can not see straight, his eyes showed pure intensity, intensity that made me have goose bumps and almost losing my balance. He stared at me seriously, and he ran his tongue over his lip piercing. I took a deep breath, feeling my cheeks burn. I should have looked like an inexperienced virgin, gasping for breath at the sight of a handsome man. I tried to open my mouth to say something to Millena, but the intensity with which he looked at me was making me unable to say anything.

"(Y / N)!"

I hear someone shouting my name, and pulling me out of the trance. I know this voice and I'm not happy to hear it now. I turn around and see Lil coming toward me, walking between people. He's dressed as a king. I should have imagined that he would dress like that, after all, he is full of himself! Lil walked dangerously close and so I took two steps back, moving away from him who had a a smile on his face. Idiot.

"Hi, I was praying you'd come." He spoke. I raised my eyebrow. "I need to talk to you."

"Talk about what?" I asked dry. If he's really thinking I'm going to be gentle to him, he's very much mistaken.

"Don’t be like that, (Y / N)." His hand came to my face, but before he could reach the destination, I slapped it down beside him. He sighed and ran his hands through his hair. "I just want to apologize, (Y / N)." Apologies? I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out. Does he want to apologize to me? Only Apologize? "I was an dick with you.I want to apologize and know if I still have a chance to get you back."

“You can forget the possibility of some day come back to me. Because it will never happen!” I was never submissive to any man, but with him I had been. And it will not happen again, not anymore. For me it's enough to do everything he wants. “In four years, everything I did was for you! I stopped going out with my friends for you, I let to go to parties because of you, just to you get there and say that I'm not good enough and that you don’t care about me anymore. Do you think a simple apology will erase the pain I felt when I heard you say those words?” I kept talking while he stood still, listening to everything he said. And that's what I wanted. In four years, he never stopped once if he wanted to listen to me, but that changed. “You can take your pink pony out of the rain, you idiot, because you will not touch me anymore.”

I walked past him, bumping into his shoulder and headed toward the exit. I knew I should not have come, my nerves are blossoming and I do not know how I managed to not jump on his neck and strangle him in the middle of the party. But I need to be superior and control the urge to kill him for everything he has put me through.

I looked from side to side as I walked, looking for Jimin or Millena to say that i would leave, knowing that I would be exposed to Millena's fury when i said that i was leaving because of Lil and knowing Jimin would want to tear his head off.

I stopped walking when I hit something concrete. I turned forward almost losing my balance again upon seeing that person. He was already without the overcoat, his shirt was dirty of something I could not identify what it was. His mouth also looked dirty from the same thing.

"Hi." And for the first time in my entire life, I felt my legs soften only when I heard the voice of a guy. I wanted to say something, I wanted to, but I could not. I was so hypnotized by those eyes that I could not think of anything to talk about. “I’m Taehyung.”

“(Y / N)!” I said and I was static as I felt him take my hand and bring it to his lips, giving a light kiss to it back.

“I liked your fantasy. You’re a Vampire?” He asked and I nodded.  “Why did you choose this to dress?” He's curious.

“I like vampires.”

“Me too. We make a perfect match.” He said smiling and winking at me. It just me or is he hitting on me? “So (Y / N), do you want to dance? You don’t look very good ... you look bored.”

How did he guess? I looked back, checking if Lil was no longer there and thankfully he was not. I glanced back at Taehyung who continued with his mysterious smile. How resist a guy like that? Just looking at him makes me shiver. I nodded and saw that his smile widened. There was a break and a new song started. It was exactly my song, my favorite. Taehyung grabbed my arm and pulled me into the middle of the room where the dance floor was. He guided me among the people that were there and we stopped in the middle of all, getting too close, because there was not much space there, since it was practically full.

"What are you wearing?" I asked, raising my voice so he could hear me.

" I’m a Vampire." He spoke close to my ear making me sigh as I shivered. Taehyung drew back a little and his hands came to rest on my waist as we danced to the sound of Pursuit of happiness. We threw our bodies from side to side as we faced each other. In a matter of seconds I forgot my discussion with Lil. In fact, I did not feel so bad that he broke up with me the way it ended. People need to take a tumble from time to time to learn how to get up.

And I'm almost thanking him for breaking up with me, maybe if he hadn't done it, I probably wouldn't be dancing with the hottest guy I've ever seen in my life.

…

This was one of the best nights of my life.

First, I finished my 4-year relationship, but now I do not feel a bit sad about it. Second, I was dancing with the most beautiful and sexy guy of the party. And third, I am almost totally drunk. I was jumping and dancing to the sound of the best songs on the planet. Millena knows how to make a party playlist. My feet were already aching inside the high heel, but who cares? Jimin was gone with Millena, probably they were having sex in her room. Some people occasionally bumped into me, but I didn’t care, I was ‘too happy’ to care.

Taehyung was behind me, holding on to my waist as we swayed from side to side without thinking that the next day we would have our whole body aching for being moving so fast. My body was warming up and I needed more drink, or something to cool me down, and feeling the warmth of Taehyung's hands around my waist did not help cool me, but made me want to feel all the warmth of his body. How did he get me like this? I've never felt so involved with a guy like that for the first time. Maybe it was the intense look or the mysterious smile, or the fact that he was dressed as a vampire, and I had a vampire fetish. I was getting confused and with an almost overwhelming desire to kiss him, but my subconscious would not let me do it. It did not give me the courage to do it. As much as I was bitching with Lil because he ended up with me like that and went out fucking girls, two days after we finished, I could not do the same. At least I think.

“I'll get another drink.” He whispered in my ear and I nodded.

What I needed now was drink and lots of dancing. With Taehyung, of course. My hair should already be messed up by throwing my head from side to side and dancing madly. And again I say who cares? The lights blinked and the beat grew louder and louder every time, I'm in paradise. How i missed going to a party like that. When Lil and I were dating, he never let me go out for parties, and yet I was with him. I was so stupid.

Still dancing, I turn back, seeing Taehyung coming to me, carrying two glasses in his hands. I was taking drink from a stranger. But I don’t think he's going to do something bad with me because if he wanted to, he could have done it. The people here are so drunk that in addition to laughing at anything, they will all be worried about their vomiting soon. I took the glass from his hand as he pulled me around the waist and danced with me to the sound of Touchin On My.

His face was close to mine, his drinking breath was not disgusting like most other guys, it was a fresh breath. He put one of his legs between mine as we slowly descended to the floor without taking our eyes off each other. I drank all the contents of my glass and threw it on the floor, unable to hold on any longer, and pulled the back of his neck, sealing our lips. I heard a faint noise of something falling to the ground and then his other hand was gripping my hair, putting even more pressure on the kiss. The hand on my waist, down to my thigh, lifting my leg and wrapping it around his waist. I should stop, but his kiss tastes so good. It must be the drink, or the simple fact of him knowing how to leave a girl excited with just a kiss.

Now the hand in my hair came down to my back, pulling me even harder against his body, making me feel his erection between my legs. I grabbed his soft hair and pulled it lightly listening to him let out a low moan between the kiss as the beat of the song became even sexier. The hand on my back came down to my ass as we rolled our hips to the apex of the song. I could feel his hard cock, locked inside his pants, rubbing against me, which at this point was almost begging for him.  We started down once more to the ground in the last chorus of the song. Rubbing against each other, feeling each other. Damn! I'm totally hypnotized by this guy.

When the song was over, we parted the gasping kiss, staring at each other. He released my leg, leaving it on the floor. His hands continued on my waist and my hands stills in his hair. A shiver ran up my body as I felt him caress my back. Fuck! I want more!

"You got me crazy for good!" He said, showing his boxy smile. His hand stroked my cheek and soon after we kissed softly. That was so good. “There's a guy staring both of us since we started to dance. Do you know him?” He asked after leaning his forehead against mine. I frowned, trying to understand, then he looked suggestively behind me. I glanced over my shoulder and noticed that Lil was leaning against the wall across the room, his eyes on me and Taehyung. He didn’t have a very good expression on his face. Taehyung’s hand squeezed my waist and I turned to him, who was looking at me curiously. I snorted.

“He's my ex-boyfriend. An idiot! Just ... Ignore!”

“Why did you break up?”

“We dated for four years and he broke up with me a few days ago. He said I was not good enough for him and that he was not interested in me anymore.” I spoke with debauchery, loud enough for him to hear. He made a thoughtful face.

"He's gay!" He spoke simply. I frowned. What? “He can only be gay to dismiss a girl like you! What I would not do with you if you were my girlfriend, (Y / N) ...” He whispered wickedly in his voice, close to my ear, making my body shiver for the thousandth time in a few hours. He gently pulled the back of my neck and kissed me again. But, I will not satisfy me just kiss him.

The music continued to roll. Taehyung kissed my cheek, then the lobe of my ear. The kisses came down to my neck and an electric current passed through my body making me run my arms around his shoulders, stroking his hair as he nibbled lightly at the sensitive skin of my throat. I gasped as I felt his hot tongue make a circular path there. If he leaves me like this now, I can not imagine what will happen if we go to bed and at that moment, I wanted this. Fuck my subconscious, fuck the reason. I want Taehyung, in my bed!

“I know we just met, but... I have to go to a more private place with you!” He whispered in my ear making me close my eyes at the shudder. I nodded, feeling my body heat up even more. He smiled, with his enigmatic smile. “It would be easier if we went up to some room in this house, but still, I want silence. The only sound I want to hear are your moans.” I nearly choked hearing those words, feeling the heat between my legs rise. Fuck, why so sexy?

"We can go to my apartment." I spoke with difficulty not to stutter.

“Okay.” He smiled again. He stroked my arm until his fingers were locked in mine. He led the way, making room for me to pass, using his free hand to get people drunk and messy out of the way, he held me close to him, almost stuck on his back, as if he were a shield. I couldn’t help but smile at that. It was weird. He had this enchanted prince's aura mixed with bad wolf. And i was loving it. We left the house and still saw many young people getting drunk and dancing to the music.

The street in front of the mansion was full of cars. I don’t understand why they drove to there. If they had three steps they would have arrived. As we walked, Taehyung put his arm around my waist, pulling me close, warming me because the wind was very cold. Winter was coming, so I do not doubt I'll have to buy warm clothes. After all, the winter became more and more rigorous every year.

I left my thoughts when I felt that Taehyung's arm was no longer around me. I looked to the side but he was not there, as I turned back with a frown, he was behind me, his back to me. Looking over his shoulder, he was holding Lil by the neck, using only one hand.

“Tae…” I started to speak, but Lil's stifled voice interrupted me.

"Stay away from her." Lil said, choking. I was totally without reaction, without words, I didn’t know what to do in front of such a scene. Taehyung's body was rigid. I could not see his face, but his shoulders were tense, and his free hand was clenched into fist, which showed that he was very angry.

“First, I'm older than you. Second, I'm much stronger than you. And third, if you don’t leave that girl alone, I'll kill you just as quickly as I can say  'get the fuck out of here' “ And the he threw him to the ground. Lil crawled back. He glanced at me before he stood up and turned his back on his way toward the party.

Taehyung turned to me, and blinked a few times, standing still, waiting perhaps for me to say something or do something. I did not even know what to do in that situation. I didn’t know if I appreciated what he had done or wondered what had just happened. I was more confused than usual. So I sighed and held out my hand to him. He bit his lip and gave me a corner smile, holding my hand and coming up to me. Soon we were headed towards my apartment again.

The building where I lived with Jimin was one of the only buildings in the city, hence the tallest. And I lived on the top floor. It had no elevator and it had 11 floors, so Taehyung and I would have to climb 11 rolls of stairs to get to my apartment. The good part is that we would be too hot, so we will take our clothes faster. bad part, we will get tired very fast.

We did not talk much during the climb, just looked at each other sometimes, flirting with the looks. When we reached the top floor, we walked to the last door in the hallway. I took the key from the boot and opened the door, entering and leaving it open so he could come in as well. I sat on the arm of the couch and ripped off the boots of my feet, feeling great relief. Looking back at the door, I see him standing outside, looking at me.

“ Are you not coming in?” I asked, and he looked at the open door. Then his gaze turned to me.

"Do you really want me to come in?"

"Of course." I Smile. "Come on! You can come in!" I said and another smile came from his lips. As he entered, he shut the door behind him, looking at me with a dark desire in his eyes. A desire that made me pant just to remember his kiss. He locked the door, threw the key on a small table beside it, and began to walk toward me. He approached me until he made me fall on the couch with him over me. Both arms rested beside my body. He passed the tip of his nose through the neckline of my costume, then in my neck, placing a kiss there and then his lips were glued to mine, making me grab the back of his neck and pull him to me.

“Where is your bedroom?” He whispered as he lowered the kisses to my neck.

"Last door down the hall." I whispered holding a groan.

His arms passed beneath me, lifting me up. Soon after he stood with me on his lap, making me entwine my legs around his waist. As he walked with me into his arms, I began to open the buttons of his blouse as i kissed his neck. Now it was my turn to tease him. I heard the door slam when he kicked it. Soon he was on top of me on the bed, kissing me fiercely while his hand did not stop pacing my body. I finished unbuttoning the buttons and pulled his shirt, tossing it somewhere in the room. I parted the kiss to admire what he had under his shirt. I let out a weak moan at the sight of his chest and his muscular arms. If he was already like this up here, I can not imagine how he should be down there.

I wrapped my legs around his waist and rolled over onto the bed, getting a surprised look. I sat on his lap and leaned over him, kissing his lips, cheek, neck, chest and then making the same way back. His hands descended from my waist to my thighs and soon after they rose, pulling my dress up. I sat down again and stood erect. I pulled the zipper off the dress that was on the side of it, down and began to take it very slowly. Then I threw it on the floor with his shirt. His hands rested on my breasts, massaging them gently over the bra.

"I don’t think you need it." He whispered and then pulled the sides of my bra, ripping it in two. I didn’t have time to complain, because his hands pulled me down and soon he had his mouth on my left breast while using his hand to massage the right one. I rested one hand on the headboard, closing my eyes and moaning as I felt his tongue making circular motions in my bosom. With my free hand, I touched his cock over the pants, listening to him moan and make more pressure with his mouth. "You will make me lose control." He whispered, taking the kisses to my neck.

“So do!” I whispered totally sedated by pleasure. His gaze darkened and his mysterious smile returned to his lips. He rolled over onto the bed and stood over me, his lips kissing my chest making me groan wildly. I squeezed the pillows between my hands as I heard my panties rip.

“I'll make you mine.” I heard his voice growing whispering and I felt his breathing down, making me arch as I felt his lips touch me. I sighed and gasped before groaning loudly and arching my body one more time. His hands caressed my chest and squeezed my breasts as his tongue caressed my clit. I placed my hands over his, holding them and putting them side by side on my body, squeezing them tightly according to the intensity of what I was feeling. “You’re so sweet, baby.” He murmured before he came down and up with his tongue over the length of my pussy. I could no longer control my groans as I felt the first orgasm coming. How the fuck is he doing this?

I squeezed his hands as he felt my legs soften and my pussy contracted. Fucking hell! I grabbed his hair and pulled it up, making him look at me with a wicked grin. He came up to me, kissing me, making me feel my own taste.

"Let me reciprocate ..." I whispered between his lips. He shook his head in denial.

"Not now, I need to get into you, or I'll go crazy." He said opening the zipper of his pants and throwing it away, along with his underwear. I gasped at the sight of his hard cock, and felt my cunt getting even wetter. He lay on me and thrust his hips against mine, coming into me, stretching my walls, making me scream with the force he entered into me. I gasped and held the headboard, trying to get accustomed to his cock inside me. He put his face on my neck and moved slowly.

"Did I hurt you?" He whispered. Too breathless to respond, I just shook my head in denial. I felt his smile against my skin. His movements grew faster and stronger, making it difficult to stifle the loud groans. He clung to me as I held to his shoulders. Both moaning loudly, uncontrollably. He increased speed and I moved against him.

Soon, he rolled over on the bed, putting me on top of him.

“Ride me.” He commanded, his voice hoarse, making my body tremble and my pussy throb. I began to move my hips, roll over and rub myself in it. His hands came off my waist and went to rest on the pillow under his head. He closed his eyes and bit his lip, narrowing his eyes. “You’re so fucking tight-fuck.” He moaned, pressing the pillow between his fingers. I let out a moan and smiled as I saw him like that, beneath me, at my mercy as I rode on his cock. I rested my hands on his chest and increased the speed of my hips. Taehyung let out a loud moan, before pulling hard on both sides of the pillow and as if it were a piece of paper, he parted it in half, causing me to stop the movements and widen my eyes, seeing feathers spreading through the air .

Half a second later, I was under him. One of his hands held mine over my head and the other was between us, massaging my clit as he pushed his hard and big cock into me. I closed my eyes, too ecstatic to care about what had just happened.

"Why so hot? Fuck, I can fuck you forever… Open your eyes and look at me." He groaned, his voice harsh, making me open my eyes and meet his dark eyes, full of malice and desire over me. "Beg me to make you come." He ordered, increasing his thrusts. "Say my name, baby. Tell me how much you want to come."

"Please, Taehyung. Make me cum. I need it so bad."

A dark smile fell from his lips and he laid his body on me. He began to use even more force in his thrusts. He brought both his hands up to my wrists on top of my head, pinning me completely to the bed. The noise of his hips against mine was filling the room, with to our groans of pure pleasure. Taehyung began to kiss and nibble on my neck, and I could feel my orgasm coming. When my cunt squeezed around his dick, and I felt that hot pain coming out of my core, I threw my head back, groaning loudly as he fucked me hard.

It was then when I felt a strange pain coming from my neck, as if he had bitten me, but a real bite, the one that plucked blood. I groaned in pain, but I was too numb with orgasm to say anything more. Then he lifted his head, pushing his cock quickly inside me. My views were stained, and I began to feel sleepy. I wanted to say something, but the last thing I saw before my eyes closed, was the blood dripping out of Taehyung's mouth, along to his fangs.

Fuck, they exist. Taehyung is a vampire.

all rights reserved © katebacks | 2018 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.

Swim - Kim Taehyung (m)

— pairing | Kim Taehyung /Reader

— word c | 2,407

— genre |   Smut.

— summary | He knew you, but he had never spoken to you. You were Hoseok's best friend, and he was really jealous of you, he never opened a way for Taehyung to approach. Until one night at a party, where Hoseok wasn’t around you. The way was free for Taehyung do what he always wanted. 

— warnings/tags | Bad words, Explict sex. 

Part 1 | Part 2

When Taehyung said he would throw a party at his house over the weekend and Hoseok asked if he could take you, Tae didn’t hesitate to say yes. It had been more than a year since Hoseok had introduced you to them as his best friend, but Taehyung never had a chance to speak formally with you. Every time you were there, he was away for some trouble or commitment, but that doesn’t mean he had never tried to contact you otherwise. But Hoseok's words in his head were very clear 'if one of you tries something with her, I will kill you. She's my best friend, and I don’t want one of you idiots to hurt her. ' And Hoseok was very scary when he was angry.

Taehyung was sitting on the couch in the living room, talking to some girls, He had his back propped on the back of the sofa, he was holding a bottle of beer in his hand as he watched you walk through the front door. You wore shorts, a white blouse, and black boots.  Why the hell does she have to be so beautiful? He asked himself mentally as he ran his eyes over you. He watched from your thighs, the curves of your breasts to your face. You seemed lost. It was when he realized that this was the first time you were in the same room with him, and Hoseok wasn’t around.

He stood up, ignoring the girl who spoke next to him and walked towards you, pulling people out of his way, wanting to get to you as quickly as possible before Hoseok came in and spoiled his chance. But he was already a little drunk, and he was feeling braver. If he had to face Hoseok to take a chance on you, he would do it.

“(Y/N)" He called your name when he was close enough for you to hear him. Your face immediately turned to his voice and you smiled shyly as he approached. “Hey”

“Hey” You said turning completely to him when he stopped beside you. "Do-do you know where Hoseok is?" You stammered when you felt so close to him. Taehyung was literally the most handsome man you'd ever seen in your life, and he was extremely handsome wearing those clothes. Jeans jacket, black pants and white blouse, with a bandanna on his forehead.

“He is...” He started to speak, but an idea came to his head and before he could think straight, he was already putting it into practice. He looked around, seeing that Hoseok was not there, then looked back at you, your cheeks red, waiting for him to respond. You were usually very social, and not very shy, but close to him you felt like a teenager near your crush. "Actually, can we go upstairs to my room for a moment?" He asked and you widened your eyes, caught by surprise at his words. "I really need to talk to you and if Hoseok sees you here, he will not let me talk to you... the way I need to." You bitten your lips, confused and not knowing what decision to make, but in order that Taehyung would do you no harm, you decided to accept his proposal and nodded.

He smiled and pointed toward the staircase that led to the second floor. You turned and started walking toward it, when you felt Taehyung resting his hand on your back, above your hip, guiding you. He was touching you over your shirt, but just to feel his big hand on you, the heat between your legs began to appear.

As soon as you entered his room, he shut the door behind him and leaned on it for a moment, thinking of what he would say to you. You were nervous, it was not the first time you had entered a man's room and was alone with him. But it was the first time you were alone in a room with Kim Taehyung. The music from downstairs could still be heard clearly in there, the bass causing the floor to tremble beneath your feet.

"So…" He started to speak and you turned to him. "Damn, I don’t know what to say." He ran his hand over the back of his neck and closed his eyes tightly before patting his head to see if his brain started working.

"You said you wanted to talk to me, but you don’t know what to say?" You asked confused.

“Well, I didn’t bring you here to really talk." He said frowning, turning his gaze to you. You arched your eyebrows and started thinking about what he might be talking about, and only when you saw his dark eyes that you understood. "Look, you're one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen, and I go crazy every time I see you and I think that I can’t touch you. And I can even talk to you, because every time you're with the guys, something happens and I have to leave. So if this is the only chance I have of being alone with you, I'll enjoy it, even if it's just to talk, if you want, of course.”

You kept standing staring at him, amazed at the statement he had made at that moment. You knew he always had something to do when Hoseok called her out with the others, so you'd never really talked. And you also knew that Hoseok was doing his best to you never be alone with one of the others, because he didn’t want to share his best friend with anyone, and you understood him, and knew that he would be very upset that you would do it behind his back, but at that moment, the only thing you wanted to do was kiss Kim Taehyung.

Before you could open your mouth to say anything, your cell phone began to ringing in the pocket of your shorts. As you looked at the screen, you saw that it was Hoseok who was calling, probably worried and wondering where you were. You looked at Taehyung, who was waiting for you to say something. You picked up the phone.

"Hobi, hi, I know I'm late, but my car tire stuck and I had to call a cab. I'll be there in half an hour." You answered, he said something on the other side, he was really drunk, so you just agreed and hung up.

You looked back at Taehyung, seeing him still leaning against that door. A song started playing downstairs and you recognized it. The sexy beat and the bold words made you even more excited than you already were. Just being alone with him in a room, wondering what might happen, drove you crazy to take off your clothes.

"We have thirty minutes before Hoseok calls me back or gets the car to go after me." You said throwing the cell phone on the chair in front of the desk and bringing your hands up to the hem of your shirt, pulling it up and throwing it on the floor.

Taehyung didn’t hesitate a second to go towards you, grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you into a kiss. You hugged his shoulders as his hands came down to your ass, squeezing it and giving you an impulse, making you brace your legs around his waist. He lowered the kisses to your neck as he walked toward the bed, laying on it and climbing over you. He pushed his hips against yours, rubbing his hard cock against your cunt still covered by your clothes. He lowered his kisses to your breasts and you thanked yourself mentally for your bra have a front clasp, making it easier for him to open it and grab your breasts, squeezing one and sucking the other. You moaned beneath him, digging your fingers through his hair and pulling them lightly.

"You have no idea how much I waited for it." He muttered down the kisses your belly until he reach your short. He opened the buttons along with the zipper and you lifted your hips, helping him pull it out, along with your panties. You didn’t have time to lose at that moment. When his attention returned to the middle of your legs, he gasped and looked up at you. He touched your clit with his fingertips, massaging you, watching the pleasure taking over your face. You closed your eyes and tossed your head back. "You're so wet that my cock will slide easily inside that cunt." You moaned, feeling your body shiver because of his words. He knelt down in front of you, kissing your thighs until finally touching your clit with his lips. You choked. "You're so wet that my dick is going to swim in you, (Y/N)." He murmured, sucking and licking you. You could do nothing but groan. He was so good with that tongue. As he sucked and stroked your pussy with his tongue, he managed to unbutton the shirt he wore and tossed it away, gripping your waist and increasing the pressure and speed with his tongue.

It did not take long for you to become a mess, moaning loudly as you could feel its core pulsing.

"We don’t have much time, Taehyung. Fuck me." You moaned pulling at his hair and he grunted at the sound of you moaning his name. He got up, kicked his shoes away, and without shame he pulled his pants down along with his underwear. You shivered at the sight of his hard, erect cock. You had water in your mouth and wanted to suck him, but before you could move, Taehyung was already on top of you, hovering over your body, with his knees positioned between your legs and he held your arms over your head, against the bed.

"Are you on birth control?" He asked and you nodded quickly. A wicked grin flickered from his lips and he bent down, gently kissing your lips before thrusting his cock deep into you. You stifled a scream in your throat, it had not hurt, but the feeling of his cock stretching your walls was so good, that you did not hold the pleasure. "You feel good?" He asked, beginning to move slowly in and out of you.

“Yeaah”

"Do you like my cock filling your pussy? Hm?" He moaned in a hoarse voice, making you arch your hips, in search of more movement. "Do you want me to fuck you until I fill your pussy with my cum? Do you want me to fill your belly with my babies?”

"Oh fuck, yes Taehyung, please." You moaned loudly and he grinned against your skin, starting to move his hips faster, until he was slamming his cock inside you, making you see stars.

Your cell phone started ringing on the chair in front of the desk and you knew it was Hoseok again. Taehyung glanced over his shoulder at the chair before exiting you, making you let out a grunt of disappointment. He picked up the phone and came back to you.

"Get on all fours and answer the call." He ordered, his eyes dark and his breath racing. You obeyed, staying on all fours, leaning one hand on the mattress and answering the phone with the other.

"Hobi-fuck!" You moaned when Taehyung came in you at once.

"(Y/N), is everything okay? It's been half an hour, where are you?" Hoseok asked from the other end of the line and you were deciding whether to curse him or not. You noticed from his tone that he was drunk, so you decided to give a discount and not curse him.

"I'm fine, Hoseok ... God ..." You moaned again as Taehyung began to thrust hard inside you. He lowered one of his hands to the middle of your legs, massaging your clit and you bit your lip hard not to moan. You could already feel your legs beginning to tremble. "I-I ... I-I'm coming, Hoseok. Don’t worry." You stammered, lowering your head and leaning against the mattress, and that position only made Taehyung's thrusts deeper into you. Taehyung used his free hand to hold your waist and increase his movements, feeling your pussy begin to tighten around him, while with the other hand, he caressed your clit. Your breathing grew heavy and you couldn’t even pay attention to what Hoseok was talking on the phone. Your orgasm was coming, you could feel it. "God, I'm coming, I'm coming. Fuck." You screamed, grabbing the sheet with one hand and squeezing the cell phone in the other.

Your cunt tightened as you came around Taehyung's cock. He released your clit and grabbed both sides of your ass, closing his eyes and slamming into you, until he was cumming too.

"Fuck (Y/N)." He growled huskily, breathing heavily, dropping his cum inside you. Seconds later he was beside you on the bed, trying to control his breathing, one arm above your back. Your faces were facing each other, and you stared at each other while you still felt the waves of orgasm through your bodies.

He smiled tiredly, brushing your hair out of your sweaty face and he leaned over, giving you a light kiss. But the moment was broken when you heard the door being opened and Taehyung hurried to pull the sheet over the two of you, hiding your naked and sweaty. Bodies.

"I can't fucking believe in what I'm seeing." Hoseok's angry voice made you who was facedown on the bed freeze. Taehyung's blood seemed to freeze too as he saw the face with which Jung stared at him. I should have locked the door. He thought. He was totally fucked. But he didn’t regret any moment.

"I can explain." Taehyung began to speak, but Hoseok raised his hand as a sign that he stayed silent.

"I don’t want a fucking explanation. I want you to get the fuck away from my best friend." He grunted in annoyance, holding himself back from advancing on Taehyung and beating him. The jealousy he had of you was bigger than anything else in the world.

You lifted your head, twisting your body and sitting on the bed, using the sheet to cover your naked body.

"Hoseok, we didn’t do anything wrong…"

Hoseok looked at you, frowning, his eyes burning. His face was red, you just didn’t know if it was anger or if it was for the drink. "Put your clothes on, I'll wait in the hallway, we're leaving." And he left the room, slamming the door behind him. You and Taehyung looked at each other and neither of you knew who was more fucked up, if it was you, or him.

all rights reserved © katebacks | 2018 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.

Ride Or Die - Chapter 10 (m)

— pairing | Jeon Jungkook /Reader — word c | 11,619 — genre | Mafia au!, angst , Smut, mature — summary |  He seemed to have come out of a museum for being so handsome, it seemed to be that badboy coming straight from the teen movies, but as you go deep into his life, you realize he was not a badguy just to annoy his parentes. He commanded a dangerous, feared gang.And you fell madly in love with him, almost leaving your life and everyone you knew behind, to be with him. — warnings/tags | Adult content, Violence, drugs, alcoholic beverages, explicit sex, low slang words. — A/N |  Like or reblog, because if you read on the phone, I'm sure that the fanfic will crash the app.The two songs used in this chapter are: Serendipity and Desolation Row (MCR). 

— Ride Or Die - Character Biography.

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | ‘10′ | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |

When you and your sister arrived at the funeral, Brooklin had her husband to give her support, while the only support you had, was over with you. You hesitated to enter the graveyard, feeling that you couldn’t do that. It was when a hand gripped your waist, and it was Jimin who stood beside you, giving you a comforting look. Becca and Suhee were there too, beside you.

"I'm here with you." He whispered to you, looking into your eyes. "We are."

You took a deep breath, let out a corner smile, and went on, your legs fluttering and uncontrollable. Jimin squeezed his hand and arm around your waist as he felt you were getting heavy, as if you wanted to faint.

"It's all right, passion, I'm here." He whispered to you again, giving you the support you needed. He passed the whole burial with your face on his chest because you couldn’t and didn’t want to see the rest of the ceremony. As soon as you got home and saw all those people, family and friends on both sides, you just couldn’t stay there and then ran upstairs and into your old room, jumping on the bed and crying with your face against the pillow. Everything Jungkook had said, you knew that wasn’t true. Yes, there were people who wanted to hurt him, and yes, you believed the accident wasn’t really an accident, but you didn’t blame him for the death of your parents. What hurt you the most was the fact that he said he regretted everything that had happened with you, as if nothing of that was ever important to him as it was to you. Your head was jumbled at the moment, you could barely breathe, let alone think.

"Can i ask a question?" Suhee asked after her, Becca and Jimin come into your room to keep you company. You nodded after you managed to stop crying. “Where's Jungkook? He never leaves your side, why isn’t he here with you?”

“We ... He broke up with me last night.”

"He did what?" Suhee got up from the bed screaming. "But what the fuck that kid had in his head? I'm going to kill that son of a bitch when I see him in front of me. He used to say that you were the most important thing in his life and now he do such a fucking thing? I'll rip his head off ...”

"Suhee." You called her. "It's okay, I'll be fine, I just need time and rest."

"Sorry, I'm just ... I'm sorry."

“Look, Suhee and I were talking and we're going to uncheck our trip. There's no way we can leave you here in this state.” Becca said, making you widen your eyes.

“Don’t you dare do that. I swear if you uncheck this trip, I'll kill you both. I haven’t spent four months listening to you talking about this damn Italy to get here and you guys aren’t going.”

"But (Y/N) …"

“No ‘but’. I'll be fine without you. I'll feel guilty if you miss this trip because of me. Don’t uncheck it, please.” You asked. You was already feeling very bad about everything that was happening, you didn’t want to be the cause of your friends' unhappiness.

"Not to mention she will not be alone." Jimin spoke up. "I will not go on vacation. I was planning to spend the holidays studying, but it will be more fun to spend them with (Y/N)."

"You better get some rest, (Y/N). We'll help your sister downstairs, get some sleep." Suhee said giving a kiss on your forehead. Becca did the same. "Jimin, can you stay here with her, so she will not be alone?"

“Sure.” He smiled.

The two girls then left the room, leaving Jimin there, sitting next to you, while you lay with your hands beneath your face. He watched you. You was so beautiful, so sweet and affectionate. You didn’t deserve to go through anything bad.

“You can lie down if you want." You whispered with your eyes closed, knowing he was sitting there, and it might be uncomfortable for him. It took him a few seconds to decide, until he lay in front of you, leaning his head on his hand and watching you as you breathed calmly, breathing still failing sometimes for yours sigh.

“Passion?” He called you before he could stop himself.

“Hm?” You murmured, opening your eyes slowly and looking at him.

"I'm sorry that he broke up with you. But I want you to know that I'll never leave you." He whispered. You continued to stare at him until the corner of your mouth moved and you gave him a small smile before closing your eyes again and crawling up to him,shoving your face into the boy's chest that smiled at your reaction and hugged you, letting you sleep next to him.

The next day, the first thing your sister told you was that your parents' lawyer had come in and left you a letter. It was a testament your parents had made a few years ago. The letter said that your parents left all their assets to you, the house, your mother's shop, the savings in the bank, absolutely everything.

You avoided talking about it with anyone.

Your friends traveled and Jimin took some of his clothes to your house where he would stay for a few days so you didn’t have to be alone, because even if your sister and brother-in-law were there, she was exhausted and you didn’t want to disturb her.

The weekend came and you hadn’t heard from Jungkook or Hoseok or any of the boys.

On Saturday, you woke up two in the morning, screaming because of a nightmare. Jimin was lying on a mattress on the floor beside the bed. He woke up scared, bewildered, wondering what was the reason for your scream. As he sat up and looked at the bed, you were sitting, hugging your legs and crying wildly. He hastened to get up and jump on the bed, taking your face in his hands, worried.

"What happened, passion? Did you have a bad dream?" He asked in a low, soft voice as he used his thumbs to wipe your tears from your cheeks. You nodded, sobbing. He sighed and took you in a tight hug. "Do you want to talk about it, hum?" He asked whispering, stroking your hair, letting you calm down. You denied it, sniffing. You didn’t remember what had happened in the nightmare, you just remembered the terrible feeling you felt and the pain too. "Do you want some water? You didn’t eat dinner tonight, do you want something to eat?" Jimin's concern was clear in his voice. You denied again.

"Just hold me, please. I'm feeling so alone. I've lost my parents, and my friends ... and Jungkook ..." You burst into tears, with your heart breaking again. Jimin sighed sadly again, and tightened his arms around you a little more, wanting to give you as much comfort as possible.

"I'm here. You're not alone. We'll get through this together. I promise." He whispered to you, stroking your back and kissing your hair. With one hand, he pulled the blanket beneath him and with the other, he laid you on the bed. He lay down beside you and pulled the blanket over you. Jimin wrapped his arms around you, pulling you against his chest, comforting you, swaying your body lightly until you fell asleep, sobbing again.

On Monday, Brooklin and Jackson had to go back to England, but they knew you'd be okay with Jimin taking care of you. Jimin made sure to take them to the airport and on the way back to your house, you got a traffic jam. And you knew it would be a long time to get out of there, so you left a song playing while staring at the cars in the street.

"You know what? We should travel." Jimin said, making you frown and look at him, confused. He looked at you, waiting for you to say something, but you could not think of much to say at that moment.

“Travel?” You asked, wanting to make sure he had actually said that. Jimin nodded.

“Yeah! We should get out of town a little. You and me. Now. When the traffic flow, I can take the highway and we can go to a city nearby. My parents have an apartment over there. It is a small old town, the streets are of stones and the buildings are mostly historical. It's beautiful. A good place to rest your head. What do you say?”

“But would we go with nothing? No bags? I don’t even have my cell phone here. And what are we going to wear?”

"We'll figure it out later, (Y/N), come on, we need this, you need it." He said and you stopped to think. Maybe that was a good idea. You didn’t have to much to lose anyway.

“Okay, let's do it.” You said looking at him. Jimin smiled and shook his head, nodding, raising the volume of the music slightly, excited.

When the cars began to roll, Jimin made the return and entered the avenue that led to the highway. You would leave the city for a few days.

...

The way to the next town was calm, filled with conversations and laughter from the two of them. The first thing Jimin did when they got there was to order a pizza. The apartment was in the only edifice the town had in the highest part of the city. It was something more rustic, older, but certainly very elegant. There were two bedrooms, one of them being a suite. The suite was fully open, the part of the balcony was totally glass, which left the view of the whole city, for whoever took that room.

A few days went by and you ended up getting the suite, even though you said that Jimin could keep it. But he said that every time he went there, he kept the suite and he was sick of the sight. You couldn’t believe him, that was a pretty view for someone get tired of. Jimin was doing everything to not let you remember the bad things that happened, but eventually when you went to sleep, you remembered and cried silently so you don’t bothered Jimin.

You always go out to walk around the city, even if it were to visit the same places. You went to the little mall, the small museum, the lake park. And every time you weren’t looking at him, focused on anything else, when you were feeding the pigeons in the park, when you were distracted admiring some artwork in the museum, or when you were walking through the aisles of the supermarket, researching what you would buy to cook for you both, Jimin could always record a video of you or take photos, admired by how beautiful you were.

Sometimes he could record you laughing alone, as if you thought of something that makes you happy. Sometimes he would stop and stare at you, as if he were traveling to another world, and when you snapped your fingers in front of him, he would turn red and try to change the subject as quickly as possible when you asked what he was thinking. When you went to the city's amusement park, you were walking on all the possible toys, but he found some resistance when he said you should ride the roller coaster.

"Are you afraid of heights?"

"Nobody is afraid of heights, people are afraid of going up in high places, falling and dying." You exclaimed, giving a weak laugh. "There are always serious accidents on roller coasters like when the cart goes off the rails, or when the security lock breaks and the person is thrown out, or when …"

"Passion!” Jimin caught your attention when he saw that you were starting to freaking out. "Nothing's going to happen to you. You don’t have to be afraid."

"How are you so sure?" You asked crossing your arms, daring him to give you certain of that. Jimin found it lovely and laughed, shrugging and looking away, you looked cute when you were being a hardheaded.

“Okay, if something happens, and I know it will not, I'll grab your waist and jump out of the cart before you get hurt.”

You gasp in disbelief.

"You will not be able to do that. You're not the spider man."

"Maybe I'm not ... Or maybe I am. You'll only know if you ride the roller coaster with me."  He said reaching out for you. You sighed and took his hand, rolling your eyes as he smiled at you and pulled you toward the toy.

“If I die and you don’t, I'll come back to haunt you." You threatened, making Jimin laugh and nod. Jimin bought the tickets, the two went to the queue and waited for your turn. As you sat down and locked the safety latches, you gripped the bar of the front seat so hard that your fingers lost it color. Jimin saw how tense you were and put a hand on yours, trying to keep you calm. You shouldn’t be like this, you've seen death close when you were kidnapped by those men. But the big difference between this moment and that moment is that before Jungkook was there to save you, but now he isn’t. The cart gave the first start and began to move. You closed your eyes too hard.

"I want to get out of here." You whimpered, making Jimin laugh.

“Unfortunately, miss, there is no turning back.” Jimin said as soon as the cart reached the top of the rails. You opened your eyes and opened them wide as you looked down and see how high you were.

“Fuck Jimin, i HATE YOU...” You shouted at the same moment the cart went down fast. Jimin laughed and made you loosen the bar of the front seat, raising your hands and screaming with you and the other people on the ride. You closed your eyes and used your free hand to grab Jimin's arm when the cart was upside down, screaming how much you hated him for doing that to you, while Jimin could only laugh at you and take advantage of the situation.

When the cart stopped on the platform, he was the first to leave, helping you out as well. You were unbalanced, because your legs were wobbly. He grabbed your waist as you walked away from the roller coaster.

"Are you okay?" He asked as they stopped near the cotton candy cart.

"I'll never do that again." You're laughing out loud. The pallor of your face began to disappear, giving way to your old, beautiful, stiff skin. "I cannot believe you made me do this." He smiled and took a cotton candy for you, watching you as you ate. "You look like a pervert looking at me like that." You said without taking your eyes off some kids dancing on a dance floor of a toy called 'Just Dance' near where you were.

"Of course, I have perversions for pretty girls who eat cotton candy." Jimin grunted, trying to look offended by what you said, but the only thing he could do was laugh after the loud chuckle you let go. "Is that interesting?" He referred to the children dancing.

"Yes, I think I'm going to go and show these children how to dance." Jimin raised his eyebrows and chuckled. You turned to him, handing the toothpick with cotton candy. "Hold my cotton candy, boy."

You bought your ticket and waited your turn. When you climbed the platform, you saw that you would compete with a child of about 11 years. Jimin stood at your side, watching you completely focused on the footsteps of the screen. As usual on that trip, he took his cell phone out of his pocket and started recording while you danced 'Pump it' from Black Eyed Peas. You started to sing along and be carried away by the music, ending up doing your own dance steps not caring if you were missing the sequences. At the end of the song, you congratulated the little girl you had competed with and headed toward Jimin, smiling. It was time to go.

A few more days passed and Jimin decided he would do something with the photos and recordings he had made of you. For a few nights while you slept, Jimin used the Desktop computer in the apartment's office and edited a video. He couldn’t find a song good enough to put as a soundtrack, until he looked at his cell phone and got an idea.

One afternoon, one day before you go back to your city, you were making lunch when Jimin yelled from the office for you. Entering the officer, you found Jimin standing beside the desk chair. He was smiling excitedly, which made you eyebrow curious as to why that excited smile. He pointed to the chair. You sat down.

"Please don’t be mad at me, I swear if you want me to delete it, I'll do it. But watch the video until the end, okay?" He asked and even confused, you nodded. He played the video and leaned against the wall, behind the chair, between the two windows of the room that had the curtains closed.

Your eyes widened when you saw that the video was composed of videos and photos of you, all of them while you were distracted, shopping, watching the lake view, looking at the old town grounds, even you dancing the day you went to the amusement park. So you started paying attention to the music, you had never heard it before but you definitely knew that voice. Your eyebrows shot up in surprise, your eyes widening and your mouth opened at the same moment, releasing a gasp and then smiling in wonder at what you was hearing. It was Jimin who was singing.

“날 구원해준 나의 천사 나의 세상 , 난 네 삼색 고양이 널 만나러 온, Love me now, Touch me now.”

The words were so beautiful, it contained so much innocence, so many emotions. Jimin's voice was soft, angelic, almost making you travel to another world just listening to him saying so many wonderful words. Your thoughts began to be filled with things about Jimin. About how much he'd been gentle and kind to you all that time, letting you complain to him about whatever you wanted. His eyes were always so clean, no guilty, no anger, were so serene. Different from the dark eyes of Jungkook that carried the darkness. He was a wonderful person and deserved someone who was wonderful to him too. And you knew this person was not you.

When the video ended, you sighed, amazed at what you had seen. Knowing he was standing behind you, you turned the chair, watching him with his arms folded, his head against the wall, waiting eager for your words.

"It was incredible, Jimin." You said, unable to find another word to express how marvelous you were. Jimin smiled in response, glad that you had liked what he had done. “Why didn’t you ever tell me that you sing?”

"Nobody knows that I like to sing, the only people who heard me singing were you and a friend who helped me record this song, it's a bit shameful, I'll admit." He said with a shrug. "I couldn’t find a better song to put in the video, so I put that one on."

"Your voice is beautiful."

"Only my voice?" He asked in a playful tone, biting his lips. You just laughed. "Really, of all the girls I know, you were the only one who never told me I'm cute."

"It's because I don’t need to, because besides you already know this, I see more than just a pretty face in you. And I'm not like other women."

"Yes, you are not. It is incredibly better." He said with a intense look, and you can not deny that it stung something in you. You swallowed, saying you had to finish your lunch. You got up and thanked him for the video, and then left the office, heading straight for the kitchen. The rest of the day you avoided getting close to Jimin, afraid that your natural instincts made you do something you could regret.

…

The next day, after lunch you prepare to return to the city. You two talked all the time laughing and playing with each other. It was raining, so Jimin took almost twice as long to return to the city, and went straight to your house. As soon as he turned on the street of your home, you frowned and narrowed your eyes at the sight of a black Blazer parked almost over the front yard of your house.

You lost the air of your lungs, almost suffocating.

"Hoseok!" You said aloud, the smile creeping to your lips, lighting your face with the thought of seeing him again.

“What?”

Jimin frowned and looked at the house, seeing that the front door was wide open. When he stopped the car in front of your house, you left, hurrying toward the house. Jimin was quick enough to get out of the car and run to you, stopping you halfway, grabbing your wrist, making you look confused at him.

"Does Hoseok have the key to the house?" He asked in a voice full of concern and you denied it. "So how did he get in? We should call the cops, it may not be he who is in there."

“It's his car Jimin." You said pulling your arm to free yourself, but he didn’t let go.

"He invaded your house while you were not here, (Y/N)..." He stopped talking when he saw someone leaving the house. You looked at the door, seeing the dark haired boy all dressed in black coming down the porch stairs and striding toward you. And he didn’t look happy. You pulled your arm again, and this time Jimin released it, and you headed toward him.

"Where the fuck were you?" He growled as you approached him, grabbing your waist and lifting you off the ground, hugging you with all the strength he had. Millions of feelings took hold of your body, but one in particular made you hug him back and cry compulsively. It was comfort. When he put you down, he made you walk around, checking to see if you were okay. “Where the hell have you been? I tried to call you, but your phone were just off, i came here almost every day to find out if you were okay. When you didn’t answer, or didn’t want to open the door for me, i thought you were very hurt, but today your neighbors said they hadn’t heard a single noise in the house for weeks. I had to go in to see if it was okay, but you weren’t here.” And so he took his eyes off of you and looked at Jimin who had been standing a few steps behind you, staring at them both. “Who are you?”

"Park Jimin. (Y/N) was with me all the time."

Hoseok then turned his eyes to you, brows furrowed, waiting for you to explain to him.

“I didn’t want to spend the university holidays alone, Becca and Suhee traveled to Italy. Jimin gave us the idea of getting out of the city so we traveled to a small town that is near here. I was safe all the time.”

"And you didn’t think to warn us?" He asked moving away from you with irritation taking over his face. "Do you have any idea how we're worried about you, (Y/N)? All of us.”

“He told me to leave, Hoseok. He told me that I would never see you again then what should I have done? I just did what he told me to do.” And so you lowered your head, looking away from him. He sighed, knowing you was right. He ran his hands through his hair and opened his mouth to speak, but his cell phone started ringing at the same moment.

"False alarm, she's here, she's safe." He said into the phone. His eyes went to you and so he held out the cell phone to you. You already knew who it was. You picked up the phone, your hands shaking, and put it to your ear, unable to speak, feeling like you had a knife in your throat.

“Are you okay?” Jungkook's calm, worried voice said from the other end of the line making your heart skip.

“Jungkook...” You couldn’t say any more. You broke down in tears, all mixed feelings, sadness, anger, pain. He was always the reason for your downfall and for your rise. He was your illness, but he was also your cure.

"Answer me, baby, are you okay? Did someone hurt you physically? Do you feel threatened or being watched?”

“No” You answered in sobs.

“Good.” And then the call ended, and your heart broke into tiny pieces again. You handed the cell to Hoseok and Jimin walked up to you, hugging you and sighing sadly to see you in that state again. You had made so much progress these days that you spent together, but a Jungkook call was enough for you to break again. Hoseok looked at you for a few seconds. He didn’t like that, but there was nothing he could do at the moment, so he just passed you, got in the car and drove away.

…

The first month after the holidays was going well, Suhee and Becca had returned from Italy and spent most of the month talking about how beautiful the country was and how charming the Italians are, while you just told them how you spent the days with Jimin in his parents' apartment. You and Jimin also went out together often, but nothing was more than a conversation, even though sometimes you might feel a sexual attraction to him. Becca and Suhee tried to drag you into parties, but you could always get away from the frat parties. Somehow, you'd rather go to an gym to train your punches than to go to places where people were rubbing each other trying to forget their personal problems, knowing that nothing you did would make you forget- which is the main problem. Your lack of Jungkook. With that you ended up getting a lot better in your defensive skills.

"Are you sure you don’t want to sleep in my apartment?" Jimin asked after leaving you at the door of your house, after they had fun at an amusement park in the city. "You don’t have to be alone, you know that.” It was the two-month anniversary of your parents' death. Jimin didn’t want you to think about it all alone, but he wasn’t going to force you to stay with him either.

You watched Jimin. You didn’t know if it was because of the drink you took after you left the amusement park, or if you really wanted that, but one thing you were sure, you could not spend that night alone. You needed him, in every way.

"Stay here with me." You asked. “I need you ... In every possible way."

The blonde smiled as he pulled you into a calm, passionate kiss. He was in love with you, and even though you didn’t feel the same for him, even though you still loved Jungkook, he was happy to touch you, kiss you, and distract you whenever you needed him.

"Make me forget, please." You whispered against his lips, causing Jimin to smile and take you in his lap, wrapping your legs around his waist and letting you open the door before climbing the stairs as you kissed his neck and then tossed you onto the bed.

"I'll make you forget everything, passion." He whispered in your era, with lust in his voice.

And that was the first time you and Jimin had sex.

…

The second month was going as smoothly as the first. Before going to college, you went to the store that used to belong to your mother and was now yours, to see how things were going. 18 years and beyond the responsibility of studies, you had to deal with the finances of the store. Thank God, Eva, the store manager was great and always helped with everything. Then you went to college, you studied, you listened to your friends complaining about the loneliness of not having a boyfriend but the advantages of it, you listened to them trying to make you believe that dating Jimin could change your life, but you just ignored them and tried to change the subject.

You would go to the gym and then would go back home, seeing it empty and sitting in the living room thinking about everything you had lost and wondering how Jungkook should be. It was like this every day. Most of the time you caught the phone in hand, about to call him, but then you would give up and call Jimin, to talk and sometimes to go out for a night walk.

As much as you know that he was doing everything for you to like him, you just couldn’t. Not the way he wanted, at least. You had affection for him, physical attraction, but you didn’t feel anything like what you felt for Jeon.

You were now ready to leave the house, dressed in black pants with a few tears along the thighs, a black blouse and a dark choker around your neck, and boots. You took your jacket on the sofa and headed for the door. It had been months since you had gone to some bar that you really liked, and since it was Thursday and Purgatory, one of your favorite places that always had live shows of rock bands on Thursdays, was open, you decided to go there, to get out of the princess bubble you were entering by spending so much time with Jimin being a prince with you.

You liked how he was caring and patient with you, but it was already starting to piss you off. You adore him, but you need to break free, let the dark take over your body, just like you did when you went to rock bars with Jungkook.

After locking the front door, you descended the porch stairs toward your car, which you had bought a few days ago with the inheritance of your parents, but stopped walking when you saw a car approaching. Jimin. You continued on your way to the vehicle that was parked on the sidewalk and leaned against it, waiting for the boy to leave the Range Rover and head toward you.

"Wow!" He said looking at you with your back against the trunk, your hands in your pockets, balanced on only one leg while the other was bent back against the bumper of the car. “Are you going to any satanic sect?”

"How did you guess?" You pretended to be surprised, making him laugh.

“I liked the outfit, a little dark for what I'm used to, but black looks good on you.”

"Yeah, black is sexy and slim." You said crossing your arms. "To which I owe the pleasure of your visit?"

“Well, I was passing by and I decided to stop by to see if you wanted to order a pizza or take a ride to clear up the ideas, but I see that you're already leaving. Where are you going dressed like that?”

“I'm going to a crossroads, I have to sacrifice a virgin to seal my pact with Satan. Do you want to go?”

“Funny.” He pretended to laugh.

“I'm going to a bar that I used to go to. Every Thursday there are live shows and I need to dive a bit into the darkness of rock again. All this light and mellow pop music is making me sick.”

It was weird. Every time you dressed in black, every time you put on punk clothes, you get aggressive with words. It was as if it were your armor, something that made you feel more confident and comfortable with who you really were, it was like if the darkness were part of you, as it was part of Jungkook. Ah Jungkook, I miss you so much. You thought, looking away for a few seconds.

"Sounds like fun." Jimin's voice said bringing you back from your thoughts and frowning at him. You blinked a couple of times confused. Jimin didn’t like rock, not even a little, he didn’t like anything that was too dangerous or ill-lit places, he definitely hated rock. You knew this because he had already said that he would rather die than go to a rock show where people started with ‘Moch’, a type of dance where the punks form a circle and there begin to make sudden movements, where they used their elbows, knees, fists to 'hit' each other, and jumping, running and colliding with each other.

"Wait, what? You said it sounds like fun?" You asked wanting to make sure it was what you had heard. Jimin nodded and smiled at you.

“Can I go with you? I've never been to a rock bar with live music.”

“I know, you made that clear when you said you'd rather die than join in with dirty, violent punks.”

"Well, yes, but I think it would be a good one. You like it, so …"

"You don’t have to do this for me.” You interrupted him before he continued to speak. "I see no problem in going alone."

"I know, but I want to do it, I want to go with you. If you want me to go, of course."

Park Jimin? In a punk bar? Or it would be fun or a total disaster. You thought.

"Well, okay, but we're going in my car."

…

As they reached the bar, you stepped out of the car while Jimin hesitated to leave, watching the people standing at the pub door. Some with Mohicans, many with tattoos on their body parts that were discovered, dark clothes or red clothes or red wine, no yellow or more vivid colors around. The sign with the name Purgatory, right above the door was red, blood red, that when it came in contact with the skin, it seemed that people were with blood all over their bodies. And he realized that by the time they got there, everyone's attention had passed to them.

You saw that Jimin was still inside the car, looking with a suspicious look on all sides. You could not help laughing at the thought that he was scared.

"Do you want to leave?" You asked, drawing his attention to you. Jimin got out of the car and stood beside you, still with that suspicious look on his face.

“Are you sure this place is safe?”

“Yes. it is not because they have clothes style’s and conduct different from the other people with whom you are accustomed to hang out, that they are bad people.”

“I'm not dressed properly ...” Jimin grunted and you rolled your eyes in impatience.

“Jimin, If you're worried about what people here will think of you for not wearing punk clothes, or for not having tattoos, you can forget it. This is not a frat party, it's not a college bar or a downtown pub. This is a rock bar, people come here to listen to punk music and get drunk, they are not here to judge you as the society where we live does all the time. They have something better to do than worry about someone else's life.”

"Then why are they staring at me?" He asked quietly. You looked around, seeing some people disguise, but they were definitely looking at you.

“They're not looking at you, they're looking at me.” She said turning to him. “Will you come in or ...?”

You then proceeded to the row of the pub, waiting for you to enter. The security guard at the pub’s door, who was looking at you before, as if he knew you from somewhere, raised his hand, trying to get your attention, but he didn’t know your name, so he called you the only thing he could call.

"Mrs. Jeon" Everyone in the line in front of you, turned around and looked at you, making you eyes widen, feeling your cheeks burn. You looked at the security guard who was beckoning you."You have a VIP pass to enter"

You opened your mouth to say that you was no longer 'Mrs. Jeon' but just shook your head and grabbed Jimin's wrist, pulling him in with you, thanking the security guard who smiled at you and entering the bar.

"What was that?" Jimin asked as they were inside the bar.

"Jungkook is kind of a member of this bar, and well, it seems they still think I'm 'Mrs. Jeon.’ “ You shrugged.

"Mrs. Jeon? But you weren’t married.”

“Yeah”

The interior of the place was filled with darkness, dimly lit. The middle of the room was not very bright, it was merely illuminated by the neon lights that stood at each corner of the bar. It were different colors, blue, red, green and dark orange, nothing fancy. The tables and chairs were wooden, all rustic. Opposite the door was a stage, where some people tuned the musical instruments and it was the most enlightened place of the bar.  On the left side there were the entrances to the toilets and on the right side, there was the bar bench next to an emergency exit.

You walked with the boy toward the counter and you could feel glances over at you. Jungkook’s girl, they still looked at you and see that. The untouchable girl, the woman that no man or woman there would dare to confront or flirt with. But they were intrigued to see you with another man other than Jeon or one of the Century boys, even if all the rumors had spread that the two had ended, many there didn’t believe they had actually finished.

"Hey, (Y/N)." The bartender, who also owned the bar, greeted you as soon as he saw you approaching.

"Danny, hi!" You waved at him, sitting on a bench, accompanied by Jimin.

"It's been a long time since I've seen you around here, how are you?" And so he noticed Jimin's presence. "And who is he?"

"This is Jimin, he's a friend of the university. He never went into a punk bar in his life." You said, making Danny's eyes widen and he looked surprised at Jimin.

"And you chose to bring him to my bar to take his virginity? I'm honored." He said putting his hand on his chest, making you laugh. "What are you going to drink tonight? The same?"

“Yes. Jimin?” You turned to him as he looked around. So he looked back at you and Danny. "I always drink whiskey when I come here, what do you want?"

"It may be the same." He smiled.

“So how's life going after ... you know.” Danny asked as he placed the two glasses on the counter and served them. You knew he was talking about your breakup with Jeon.

"It's going well, I'm still getting used to it, but the truth is I didn’t want any of this to happen." You said leaning over the counter, You took a sip and as the alcohol touched your mouth, a flashback came to your mind.

The first time you went there, you were not dating. Jungkook introduced you to everyone as a friend, but everyone there looked upon you as his girl, even because he never brought anyone there who was not one of the boys. You remembered the day you started dating and he took you there because it was romantic rock night, was having a cover show where the band on stage played Every Breath You Take by The Police, and you practically forced him to go to the front of the stage, because you were in love with that song, one of your favorites.

"This song says a lot about me." Jungkook said as he hugged your waist from behind, letting you lean your head against his chest.

“Are you basically saying you're going to become a stalker?”

"Maybe." He laughed. "But from now on, I'm not leaving you. You're mine, forever." He whispered into your ear, giving a wet kiss to your neck, making you shiver.

"I can live with that." You answered, turning your face, looking at him with a smile on your face and kissing him.

When you came back to reality, you took another sip of your drink, and looked at Jimin who stood beside you, watching the place. Part of you was disappointed that he was there with you and not Jungkook, but another part told you that you needed to forget your ex boyfriend and continue your life. Maybe going there that night would help you say goodbye to you old life, to your story with Jeon, and maybe the next day you would be ready to start a new life, but this time with Jimin.

“If you keep staring like that, some people will think you are interested in sex or that you want to fight.” You said drawing the attention of the boy who took his eyes off a group of strange-haired girls who were near the door of the ladies' room. “What do you think about the place?”

"I don’t know exactly, it seems to be a cool place, different from what people say." He said finishing his drink. “You know, people say punks are violent and clueless, they break things for fun ...”

“Yeah, they do. But the regulars of this bar are not like that, at least not in here.” You said taking a look around. "And Danny has a shotgun under the counter, so no one here is going to try something stupid." You laughed.

"Did you know this place for your ex?" Jimin asked and you nodded. "He was a punk, too?"

“No, he just likes the musical style and wasn’t much of a fan of colorful clothes. He never wore vibrant colors.”

“Why?”

“He liked the darkness. Black is comforting to him.” You said with a shrug.

"How did a girl like you come to the middle of all this mess?" He laughed disbelievingly. “You don’t seem to be the kind of girl who likes that sort of thing, you know? I mean, I understand you might like the music and maybe the style of clothes that looks great on you, but look at this place! It is poorly lit and has a strong smell of alcohol. Probably if I go to the bathroom, I'll find two people eating each other, or poking. You shouldn’t be here in the midst of all these ... savages.”

“And what kind of girl do you think I am, Jimin?” You asked, controlling the tone of your voice, not wanting to show that at that moment you were angry, frowning as you turned to him. “The kind of girl who likes to go to frat parties, who likes to be flirted with by a guy who is going to tell me that I am the most beautiful girl in that place, that will fill me with compliments and promises, and then take me to bed and the next day spread my name across the campus like another fuck he had?” Jimin opened his mouth to speak, but you didn’t give him time to respond, just kept talking. “Or the kind of girl who likes being flattered all the time, pretending to be dumb and stupid to get what she wants instead of running after it?”

“I didn’t...”

“Or maybe you think I'm that kind of woman who prefers to stay at home watching stupid romantic movies with ridiculous soundtracks, rather than being somewhere enjoying my life. I'm not a princess like Becca and Suhee, Jimin.” You said looking away, not wanting to face him at that moment. “I'm not the girl of your dreams, this is what I like, not always going to romantic dates, or someone opening the car door for me. I want to live, take risks, not have my life facilitated by a man. This is me.”

Jimin was quiet for a moment, he didn’t know you would be so offended by what he had said.

"I'm sorry (Y/N), it's just that when I met you, you seemed like a fragile, cute girl who needed someone to take care of you, that’s why I'm so sticky with you. But now I understand that you are a strong woman, that you do not need anyone to do things for you, because you can do it on your own. And I thank you for bringing me here today and showing your true self. I'm glad you trust me enough for that.” And then he smiled softly, making all the irritation drain from your body. You smiled at him and approached him, giving him a hug. "I think we need a little more whiskey.”

…

After a few more doses, you were already beginning to feel alcohol affect your senses. Now you and Jimin laughed as you talked to Danny about some funny, random matters.

"The band is late today." You commented to the owner, who laughed and looked around at the stage. "Who's playing tonight?"

“It's not a band, it's just 5 guys who got together and asked me to play something tonight. You know the lead singer, Jung.”

"Jung?" You choked. "Are you talking about Hoseok?" He nodded, leaving you in shock. "He never ... I didn’t know he sang …"

"Neither do I, it seems we both had a surprise today ... and there he is." He said pointing toward the stage. Turning, Hoseok was up there with four more dudes. In place of the black T-shirt, there was a blood red color. He wore a black jacket and pants of the same color, as always, all torn. His black hair was tossed back, showing the bandage over his right eyebrow. There were chains hanging from the waistband of his pants and he wore boots.  People began to notice the band's presence there and began to scream at the sight of it, and many commented in surprise at seeing Hoseok up there. Many girls shouted compliments as "hot" or begged him to fuck them. And no wonder he was very successful among women for being as handsome as Jungkook.

It wasn’t long before in all that darkness he could find you sitting in the bar and staring into his eyes. He was surprised to see you there and happy too, he missed your company. His eyes slid from you to Jimin who was at his side and he laughed with derision, as if he did not believe that someone like him could be there, but he assumed that a man did everything for a woman when he wanted to fuck her.

As soon as you realized that he was staring directly at you as he adjusted the microphone and the others moved into position, you had no other reaction than to smile at him, feeling your heart warm to see your sunshine again. That was one of the things you missed, Hoseok and the smile who looked like the sunshine. A smile that always helped your day get better.

When he realized you were looking back, he cocked his head to the side and raised his eyebrow, giving her a defiant look, smiling at you shortly after, making all the girls look in your direction, some even commenting something like 'she already has Jungkook and now she's got Hoseok too? Who does she think she is? ' and others replying 'she's Jeon's girl, she can do whatever she wants.'

The first chords of the guitar began and as soon as the drums came together with the stringed instrument, the people who were close to the stage started jumping and dancing to the music. You laughed when you saw Hoseok shaking his head and moving as if he were really the lead singer of a rock band. You knew that song, Desolation Row, part of the Watch Men soundtrack, a film you and Jungkook's friends had on their favorites list.

As soon as he began to sing, you opened your mouth gasping, surprised and in shock at the same time to see that he really was good at singing. You smiled in excitement, feeling euphoric to see him that way, so wild, practically screaming into the microphone while dozens of punks jumped with the strong melody and the bass chords of the guitars, and in the front of the stage, a group started with the famous ‘moch punk’, everything Jimin hated most, but he seemed not to be paying attention to that, but on how you shook your head and wiggled your arms, as if you were playing an invisible drum.

“Cinderella she seems so easy, ‘well it takes one to know one’, she smiles, and she puts her hands in her back pockets, so Betty Davis Styles.” Hoseok sang pointing to you who laughed. And then Jung's eyes came out of you and they stopped at Jimin, moving his arm and pointing at him. “Now but in comes Romeo moaning “you belong to me i believe” and someone says “you’re in the wrong place my friend, you better leave”

Jimin seemed to feel the force of the words and flinched as if he'd just had been punched. Hoseok laughed, dark-eyed, realizing that Jimin had realized that this was a warning to him, telling him to stay away from you, because that was not a place for him. Since Hoseok met him that day at your house, he hadn’t liked Jimin, no man other than the Century boys should be as close to you as Jimin was at that moment.

From that moment, Jimin began to see that many of the guys who were there looked at him strangely and laughed while they said something to each other, that's because they understood what Hoseok meant. But you didn’t seem to have noticed Hoseok's reference, and just kept dancing and singing.

"(Y/N)?" Jimin called, getting up from the bench he was sitting on and holding your arm, making you stop dancing and look at him confused. "I think we should leave."

"What?" You asked, pointing to your ear, you hadn’t heard anything by how loud the music was.

"I think we should leave, your friend seems not to like seeing us together." He said louder, pointing back to the stage where Jung faced them with a shameless smile for you, but for Jimin seemed threatening. You shook your head, ready to protest, but before you could say anything, the front door was wide open and over the music you could hear the policemen shouting sending everyone to the ground.

In the past, you would freeze in place or obey, but after the experiences you had, your instincts eventually changed and you were ready to run away as many people did, but Jimin simply stood frozen in place with his arms raised. The music had stopped and was replaced by bottles being broken, groans, punches, cries of despair and roars of hatred. No policemen would go in there and force everyone to do what they wanted without there being any conflict.

You grabbed Jimin’s hand just as a policeman approached with a pistol in his hand, but a punk jumped on his back and knocked him to the ground. It was when a hand grabbed your wrist and started pulling you toward the emergency exit. You were pushed a few times until you reached the back door and Hoseok pushed you out, out into an alley. Jimin fell with his knees on the floor, hyperventilating, behind you, almost knocking you down, but Jung grabbed your arm and closed the door, frowning at the boy on the floor breathing through his mouth.

“How did you get involved with such a loser? I didn’t know the college guys were so pussy like that, (Y/N), you deserve someone better.” Hoseok laughed scornfully at Jimin who turned his furious face to Jung. “What the fuck did you think you were doing surrendering like that, you idiot? You would get (Y/N) in trouble if you were arrested, you little shit.”

"Hoseok, he was scared. Give him a break." You scolded him and he looked laughing at you. Before he could say anything, the door behind him was snapped open and before the cop who opened it had a chance to see you or Jimin, Jung hit him with a kick in the chest, tossing him back into the bar, shouting for the two of you to run. You grabbed Jimin's arm and pulled him out of that alley, you circled the block and got in the car so you could start the engines and get out of there.

A few miles away, you burst out laughing, having to slow down and stop the car on the side of the road, throwing your head against the seat and laughing loudly, making Jimin confused, annoyed and bewildered to turn to you with scowl, hoping you would explain why you were laughing.

"That was a lot of fun." You said between laughs.  

"Fun? Is this your idea of fun, (Y/N)? We were almost arrested, and your crazy friend beat up a cop and threatened me. I don’t know where to see fun in the middle of this shit." He altered his voice in frustration.

“Hoseok didn’t threaten you.”

"Oh no? And what was that when he pointed at me in the middle of the verse that said ‘you're in the wrong place, my friend, you better leave?’ He called me a loser and a pussy because I was scared of all that shit, I am not to blame if I do not have the same custom that he and those trash's has to be accost by the police whenever they breathe.”

“Jimin, calm down.”

"No, (Y/N), is this what you want for your life? Get involved with people like that? Go to a dirty bar, full of bad elements and pray that the police don’t invade the place like they did today and arrest you? Live with someone who is a thug and just can bring problems to you instead of actually caring for you? Because that's what that Hoseok and probably your ex boyfriend are, fools, who wouldn’t know how to take care of someone like you." Jimin said loudly, looking out of the car through the car window, taking a deep breath, trying to calm down.

"Jungkook always took good care of me." You replied without even realizing it, it was already automatic for you to defend Jeon when someone said he did not know how to take care of you.

That made Jimin laugh with sarcasm and turn to you, even more angry.

“Oh yeah? So where the fuck was he when you found out your parents were dead?” He yelled, banging his hand on the car’s roof, making you cringe at his action. “Where the fuck was he when the funeral and burial of your parents happened? Because as far as I remember, it was me who was there with you, all the time. Since that day, who is always with you, wiping your tears, listening to you talk about your sorrows and complain about the lack of your parents, (Y/N), its me, not Jungkook, or Hoseok or any of those jerks punks with whom you waste your time. Its me. And you know it, but you keep defending him, as if he weren’t the one wrong in this story, as if all of your the tears in those last two months weren’t because of him.”

You just stood there, staring at him. He was not lying, he was not exaggerating. But the way he had said it, even if he had told the truths you already knew, that made your heart bleed again. Jimin put his head in his hands and took a deep breath. He realized what he had said and sighed, disappointed with himself. He raised his head, looking at you and watching you looking out of the car. From where he was, he could see your red cheeks, or you were very angry, or wanted to cry. Jimin wanted to punch himself for it.

"(Y/N), I'm sorry ... I didn’t want to ... I shouldn’t have said these things ..." He said touching your shoulder. You took a deep breath and stared at him.

“It's okay, you didn’t say anything but the truth.” You said in a low voice. "I'd better go back to driving."

You said starting the car and driving to your house. When you got out of the car, you didn’t even say goodbye to Jimin, just walked up to the porch, walked in, locked the door and went to your room, where you threw yourself on the bed and cried.

…

"Wait, did you take Jimin to a rock bar? Jimin? Park Jimin?" Becca asked, while the three of them were in the library studying together.

"Yes, and If you don’t stop repeating his name, I'll stick this book in your face." You threatened, lifting up the thick book of physics you used to study.

"Isn’t it obvious to you that he only did it because he likes you, (Y/N)?" Suhee asked incredulously. “I can’t believe you actually took him to a bar like that. He's not Hoseok or Yoongi, and he's certainly not Jungkook. I understand why he hated it all.”

"He didn’t hated it, he just panicked when the police invaded the place, sending everyone to the ground."

“Couldn’t you go to somewhere else?”

"No, it's been months since I've been to a bar I liked. All those couple dates were killing me. I can’t live a quiet life anymore, I can’t go to ice cream parlors and sit there eating vanilla ice. I don’t know how to live a life in the light anymore. I like the darkness. I like the places he took me... I love Jungkook.”

"Maybe that's your mistake, (Y/N)." Becca said. "Maybe you're looking for something to replace what you felt for Jungkook, but you know you will not find it.”

"Translate it, please." Suhee said closing the book she was reading.

“Jungkook was a Badboy, you went to bars at night, he drove like crazy, his friends were as crazy as him and everything you did was more intense. But Jimin, he's more timid, he's a Good Boy, not a Badboy. He likes pop instead of punk rock and drives and a Range Rover instead of that Jeon’s flivver.”

“Dodge 78. And it's a classic. Not a flivver.”

“What I mean is you want to replace Jeon with another Jeon, but that will not work, you'll never find another like him.”

"Oh Becca, thank you so much for telling me what I already know, my dear." You said ironically, making your friends laugh. “And this is not the time to talk about it. I have to study for the test next week.”

…

Later, you were heading towards your car, you just wanted to go home and take a hot shower. On the way you began to think, missing the other boys. You missed the silly conversations you had with Yoongi, like when he told you the first time he got drunk and climbed on a table, dancing to Britney Spears in the  high school.

You missed the food Jin cooked and how he fight with you when you 'pinched' the food still in the pots and he would scream for you to get away or you could get burned.

You missed how Taehyung made you laugh at his jokes and how cute he was with you, giving you all those hugs and affections even with Jungkook threatening to rip his fingers off.

You missed Namjoon and all the smart talk you had, talking about classic books and movies that you loved to read and see.

And as much as you saw him last night, you missed Hoseok, missed the way he tried to be affectionate with you, how he looked after you when Jungkook was not around, how he made you feel secure about your relationship with Jeon and how he showed you that you were the strongest girl he had ever known.

You missed them all in one, missed how they made you feel loved and part of something, part of a family that loved you and cared for you as the most precious thing they had. You definitely missed being the Century girl. The friendship you had with them and the love you felt for them was so strong and truly, you wanted to be able to take care of them, to support them, but now being away from Jungkook, it might not be possible anymore.

You were so deep in thought that you didn’t even realize that you were walking toward a person, until you hit her back and fell on your ass, letting your books spread around you.

"Oh my god, (Y/N), are you okay?" Jimin asked turning back, surprised that you had bumped into him and fallen. He held out his hand to you, helping you up, and then began to collect your books. "It's all right?"

“Yes, I was pretty distracted. Sorry.”

"No need to apologize ... I'm the one who needs to apologize to you." He said giving you the books, making you frown. “For yesterday. I was an asshole yesterday and I shouldn’t have said all those things to you. I was just annoyed by the situation and said what I shouldn’t. I never, ever wanted to hurt you, (Y/N).”

"I know, and we're fine. You did not say anything I did not already know." You said squeezing the books against your chest. “It's just... I can’t deny that I like that, Jimin. I like badly lit bars, I like my torn clothes, I like the music with the violent rhythm. I like the adrenaline of being among those people. And I will not change.”

"It's because of him, isn’t it?" Jimin asked biting his lip.

"Yes Jungkook was the one who showed me this life, he was who showed me that I always knew that I wasn’t part of my old life, that this life is was what I wanted for me. This is what I like, the dark, the hard, the intense… And I love him, and I will never stop.”

“How could you love him after all he did?” He asked, disbelieving.

Your eyes that were previously trying to avoid his, went toward him like a shot, and the blood ran from your face. Your shoulders tensed and you squeezed the books harder against you. You wanted to make yourself misunderstood and ask what he was talking about, but at that moment the feeling that Jimin knew who Jungkook really was, took over your body, leaving you in shock and with no reaction for the first few seconds.

"What are you talking about?" You fought so that your voice didn’t come trembling out of your mouth.

"You know what I'm talking about, (Y/N)." He snorted irritably. "He broke up with you the day your parents died, and Suhee told me how violent he was with the people who came near you." You let out a relieved breath knowing that this was what he was talking about, not about Jeon being a gangster, selling drugs, and killing people. “She also said that he had no remorse when he got into a fight, I don’t doubt that he is some kind of gangster and you don’t even know it.” You frowned, having the feeling that Jimin knew more than seemed. “I remember when Watson tried to attack you at that frat party, Jungkook practically killed him asphyxiated, and he threatened to kill him.”

“He was trying to protect me.”

“By almost killing that guy? How are you sure the people he walks with wouldn’t hurt you? How are you so sure he wouldn’t do that to you?”

“Because he loves her. And so do we.” A voice said behind you and you jumped in surprise. You recognized that voice. Turning back, you came face to face with Taehyung standing right behind you, both arms crossed and one eyebrow arched, with an expression that was a mixture of boredom and irritation in his face.

Your heart leapt as you saw him there, and you didn’t hesitate to throw yourself at him, dropping the books again, letting out a scream of excitement and hugging him tightly around his waist, thrusting your face into his chest. He laughed and hugged you too, pressing you against him and stroking your back.

"Tae, I missed you so much." You whimpered against his chest, squeezing him even more in your arms.

"I missed you too, we all missed, to speak the truth." He said now stroking your hair. "Hoseok said he saw you yesterday and I was jealous, so I thought, why not come here and give you a bear hug like old times?" You stepped back a little and looked at him, watching him smile with that cute smile he had whenever he was with you.

You were about to answer when you heard a low, ironic laugh coming from behind you. The smile faded from Taehyung's face as his eyes drifted toward Jimin, who had clenched chin, looking away as he shook his head.

"Tell me the joke, because I want to laugh too, clown." Taehyung growled, releasing you from his embrace and pulling you to his side, taking you out of the way between him and Jimin.

In all the time you've lived with Jungkook and the Century, you'd just seen Hoseok and Jungkook intimidating, but you'd never seen Taehyung in any sort of tense situation like this. Close to you, he was always radiant and fluffy, so see the facial expression that was almost like a manic smile on his face, got you totally surprise and made your body shiver instantly.

“I know who you are.” He said and Jimin turned to him, staring at him with the same look he had when Hoseok offended him last night, pure annoyance. “You're the coward who Hoseok talk about. Who almost gave himself to the police yesterday at the bar. He told me that when I found (Y/N) here, you'd probably be together, since you seem to follow her around like a puppy.” Taehyung sneered, taking a step toward Park who narrowed his eyes, swallowing the saliva, already wanting to fight him, but controlling himself. “What a pussy like you were doing there? I thought people like you just went to expensive, boring places with your buddies, your dumb girls, and bad drinks, where you meant to be better than the others.”

"You don’t know anything about me. It's none of your business what I was doing there, and certainly nothing I do in life is." Jimin said closing his hands in fist and stepping toward Taehyung, who laughed derisively at Park's attempt to intimidate him.

"Oh, you were there because of (Y/N)." Taehyung said, tuning his voice, making a stupid baby voice, as if he was talking to a child, irritating Jimin even more. “It must be hard being the second choice, isn’t it? By the way, being the seventh option, because before you, come six guys that I'm sure she wouldn’t hesitate to pick one of us before you, you shit.”

"Taehyung!" You scolded him, making him look at you and leave the sadistic smile aside to smile cute to you who was shocked by his attitude. Why attack Jimin? He didn’t do anything wrong with them or you. So why were they treating him like that?

"So it is with this kind of people you want to be involved, (Y/N)?" Jimin asked. "You deserve more than that."

"And you deserve to be spanked, but you're lucky I can’t touch you." Taehyung said, turning back to him, his expression threatening again. "At least not here, so you better be very careful where you walk, your trash ...”

“Taehyung!” You said it in a louder voice, frowning and slipping between him and Jimin, pushing him back. Jimin just turned his back and left. “What's going on here? Do you know him?” You asked seeing Jimin walk away. Taehyung turned to you with a look that made you suspicious. He blinked quickly and looked away before answering.

“Nope.”

“Tae.”

“Seriously, I don’t know him, I just don’t like him. He's trying to steal my little sister. I am not obliged to accept this in silence.” He shrugged and you snorted, bending down to pick up your books on the floor. "Are you free tonight?" He asked, lowering himself in front of you, helping you get the books.

"Yes, why?"

"We're going to a party." He said making you look up and frown at him as he smiles sweetly at you. He was up to something and you had no doubt about it.

all rights reserved © katebacks | 2018 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.

Ride or Die - Chapter 11 (m)

— pairing | Jeon Jungkook /Reader — word c | 5,606 — genre | Mafia au!, Angst , smut. — summary |  He seemed to have come out of a museum for being so handsome, it seemed to be that badboy coming straight from the teen movies, but as you go deep into his life, you realize he was not a badguy just to annoy his parentes. He was not a Badboy, but a BadMan. He sold drugs and his friends too. He commanded a dangerous, feared gang.And you fell madly in love with him, almost leaving your life and everyone you knew behind, to be with him.. — warnings/tags | Adult content, Violence, drugs, alcoholic beverages, explicit sex, low slang words. — disclaimer | myself and this fic DOES NOT condone violence, abuse, use of drugs, alcohol or any kind of crimes. This is a fanfic, an alternative reality, I have no intention of offending anyone. If that makes you feel bad, please do not read. In this fanfic the character is not abusive to the reader, and remember, what Jungkook does in this fanfic is not what he does in real life. Myself or this fanfic does not have any type of connection with BTS, Jungkook or Bighit. Hope you like it.

— Ride Or Die - Character Biography.

O1  | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | ‘11′ | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |

Jungkook was sitting on the edge of his bed, he stared at your photo as wallpaper on his cell phone screen and sighed every time he thought how much he missed you. Of all the decisions he had to make in his life, leaving you was by far the most painful and difficult. He didn’t mind killing people, torturing them, making them suffer, let alone the consequences his actions would do to their lives. But when it came to you, it all got complicated.

During the months that you were separated, he tried his best to stay away from you, the first month was easy, until the day Hoseok came saying that he hadn’t found you and that the neighbors hadn’t seen in weeks. Jungkook panicked, sending as many men as he could to search for you around the city. When Hoseok called him again saying that everything was fine and that you had appeared safe and sound, he had to hear your voice to prove it, he could barely hold himself as he heard your tearful voice calling his name on the other end of the line, and when he hung up the phone, he tossed the phone into the wall and destroyed everything that could be destroyed in that room. He hated to be the reason for your pain.

The second month became difficult, Jungkook had to fill himself with jobs to not go after you and to take you in his arms, beg for you to forgive him and accept him back. That month was simply the worst month for anyone who decided to annoy the infamous Jeon Jungkook. The fury, the anger, the lack he felt from you was consuming him and he managed to become even more dangerous and deadly than before. Anyone who crossed his path, anyone who dared go wrong with him, annoy him or who simply touched on the subject ‘you’ Jungkook had no mercy.

The third month became impossible for Jungkook to overcome the lack of you. He started to get out of control, with the feelings on his skin, taking control of his mind and body, making him unstable and a million times more dangerous, so he turned away from the leadership of the Century, leaving it in Hoseok's hands. Jungkook barely left the room during the day, and if he hadn’t eaten before, now he simply didn’t even come close to meals. When he realized, he was going out at night to chase after you. Often he just stopped across the street from your house and watch you through the living room windows. Sometimes he would go to college and watch you from afar, how happy you looked with your friends. But he knew you well enough to know that the smiles you gave them was fake, because he knew you were suffering too. Other times he would follow you through the streets at night, hidden in the shadows, while you were doing night walks. He loved the way you shook your head, moved your feet and arms, totally relaxed, dancing to the music that came from your headphones. He hated dancing, but he loved watching you dance.

Sitting in that bed, looking at your photo, he remembered one night as he was following you, he was across the street, hidden in the shadows of the alleys. You were dancing again, as you did every time you went out to walk the night. He then spotted a man a few meters behind you. From the way he walked and looked at you, Jungkook knew that this man would try something and he wouldn’t let anything happen. No one would harm you, his angel, his light.

With quick, silent steps, he crossed the street and approached the man who was already approaching you from behind. The music on the headphones was so loud that you didn’t even hear that approach. Jungkook crept behind the man and grabbed him from behind, covering his mouth and pulling him to an alleyway few yards behind you. Jeon threw the man on the floor of the alley and peered into the street, seeing that you kept walking and dancing quietly, a sign that you hadn’t noticed anything.

“Are you crazy ...” The man started talking, rising from the ground and heading toward Jeon who opened his pocket knife and let the blade slip out, striking the man with the knife, piercing his lungs, letting him fall to the ground and agonize.

"Yeah, I got crazy when I saw what you were about to do with my girl." He said quietly lowering himself to the side of the man who groaned in pain and began to choke on his own blood. He smiled, satisfied with what was happening, the blood being pumped out of the man's body through the hole Jeon's knife made, soiling his black shirt with blood. “I'll have mercy on you and I will not stab you again. I hope you suffer a lot on the road to hell. One day, I'll be there to stab you again, and again and again.” He growled and got up, putting his penknife in his pocket and walking with his hands in the pockets of his jacket, as if nothing had happened.

Returning to the present, Hoseok's voice caught his eye, making him look at the door and see his friend leaning against the portal. He did not have a good expression on his face.

"Yoongi and Namjoon are in Velvet and apparently have members of the East gang there. The two are thinking that maybe the guys want to pull a fight with them. I tried to call Taehyung to send him there, but his phone It's off. "

"Alright." Jungkook said getting up from the bed and walking out of the room. The two of them left the house and entered the Dodge, heading towards the nightclub.

When Jungkook and Hoseok arrived at the pub, the first thing they did upon entering the establishment was to look for Yoongi and Namjoon, who were leaning against a wall, in a dimly lit corner of the place. Both of them had crossed arms and stared a specific location, four guys sitting in the bar, talking to each other and looking disguisedly in the direction of the two.

"Did they say anything to you?" Jungkook asked as he approached his friends.

"No, but they've been staring at us since they arrived. The first one, wearing that red T-shirt, I've seen him walking with the lider of the East gang. He's a guard or something.” Namjoon said.

"And the four of them are armed." Yoongi said. "They'll do something, and if it's not with us, it's with the place. If they're not going to attack us four, that means they intend to attack the place."

“They're in Century territory, if they do anything, they will provoke war with us and the Jeon's mafia.” Jungkook said turning around and watching the men. "They cannot be stupid enough to get into enemy territory in just four. There must be more of them around here."

"And if there are more of them, we're at a disadvantage. Where is Taehyung anyway?" Namjoon asked.

"I don’t know, his cell phone is off." Hoseok said. Jungkook snorted and pulled out his cell phone, trying to call Kim again. That's when Hoseok saw Taehyung coming through the door of the nightclub. Yoongi and Namjoon were relieved to know that nothing had happened to the boy, but Hoseok frowned when he realized that there was a hand holding Taehyung's arm. It was a small, delicate hand, it was a girl's hand. “Holy shit.” Jung exclaimed loudly and nudged Jungkook's shoulder, drawing his attention as he turned in the direction the others looked at with wide eyes. Jeon almost had a heart attack when he saw you standing next to him, holding his arm as he made his way through the crowd.

You wore a white dress, and high heels. So innocent and helpless hiding behind Taehyung. Jungkook did not know what to think at the time. He followed you both with his eyes and as you walked towards the drinks counter, where those men were, the fury invaded the veins of Jungkook. He didn’t think twice before taking the gun he kept at his waist and walking toward the drinks counter. The other three did the same, following the leader. He was not going to allow anyone to touch you. They wouldn’t allow it.

Meanwhile, you and Taehyung ordered your drinks from the bartender and talked about something random when one of the men who was sitting next to you, wearing a red shirt, said something catching your attention.

"Wow, Jeon's famous girl is even prettier up close.”

Taehyung raised one eyebrow, looking directly at that man.

"Yes, but it's not for your beak, you scumbag."

"Now that you're done, you decided to get another member of Century, sweetheart?" The guy in the red shirt asked, raising his hand toward you, but before he could touch your skin, Taehyung pulled you back and Jungkook quickly approached, holding the man's head and slamming it against the counter, pushing it against the furniture, and placed the gun on his head. The other three boys made a point of doing something, but Yoongi, Namjoon, and Hoseok placed them on the sight of their pistols. The bartender simply ignored that gesture as half the people there as well.

“If you touch her, I'll spread your brain across the floor.” Jungkook growled, putting pressure on the hand that shoved the man's head against the counter. You stared wide-eyed at the scene above Taehyung's shoulders that held you protectively behind him. You couldn’t describe the feeling of seeing Jungkook again after so long. He was still the same, handsome, charming, intimidating, passionate, and dangerous. He was still the same man you fell in love with. “I want you and your fucking friends out of my area in 30 seconds, or I'll hunt you down, kill you and send your bodies to your families, you got me, you shit?” The man just nodded frantically before Jeon grabbed his hair and tossed him to the floor. Half a minute later, those four men rushed out of the nightclub, which made Hoseok slightly confused. It seemed to be being too easy.

As soon as Jeon saw that these men had left the pub, he turned toward Taehyung, advancing furiously against him, hitting him with a punch in the jaw, making you hop back and cover your mouth, smothering a cry of surprise .

“But what the hell are you doing with her? What the fuck do you have in mind? What did I tell you to do, you idiot?” He screamed and hit him with a knee in the stomach, making you hold your breath, startled by Jungkook's reaction to Taehyung. “I told you and the others to stay away from her precisely because of that. The danger.”

And when you saw that Jeon would strike another blow toward Taehyung, you jumped in front of him, intending to protect him. You closed your eyes tightly, waiting for the impact Jungkook's punch would have on you, but nothing happened. When you opened your eyes, Jeon stood with his fist raised, standing in the air, his eyes wide and his face pale. Namjoon and Yoongi looked at each other in astonishment as Hoseok went on the defensive position, ready to fight Jungkook if he had really hit you, even though he knew Jungkook would never do it. Seconds later, Jungkook's face turned red and he lowered his fist, exploding shortly afterwards

“What the hell, (Y/N), I could have hit you, are you crazy?"

Three months away from you and that's what he had to say? You sighed, feeling the tears threatening to fall from your eyes, the sadness and happiness of seeing him again personally, but the sadness you felt through his words was triggering an avalanche of emotions that you just couldn’t handle and pretend to be okay.

"Is that all you have to tell me?" You whimpered, a tear trickling down your cheek, making Jungkook's expression soften instantly. He lowered his shoulders, finally realizing you were there in front of him, but he was acting like a jerk again.

You snorted and turned, running toward the pub's exit, head down and after passing through the sea of people, you finally left the nightclub hugging your body feeling the chill of the night. That was not how you planned your re-encounter with Jungkook, that was not how it was supposed to be. In your head that scene would have happened completely different. After he had expelled those men from there, he should have held you tightly, let you cry on his chest, he should comfort you, he should apologize for the days you missed crying for him, he should say that he loved you, and missed you. He should have been sweet to you and not rude. You sniffed once more, holding as much of your tears as you could, you didn’t want to cry.

And at that moment, you could only think of Jimin's words. It was always him who dried your tears, it was Jimin who was always with you when you cried because of Jungkook and in that moment, once again you cried because of him. That wasn’t right, why were you in love with Jungkook? Why couldn’t you be in love with Jimin? He sure wouldn’t make you cry like now. However, your body, soul and heart belonged to Jungkook. And forever would be his, even if it hurts, even if you were not together, you would never find someone like him, you would never love someone like him, not even Jimin.

Jungkook didn’t waste a second and went after you, past people and following you out. He saw you walking briskly down the sidewalk, arms wrapped around your body, trying to shield you from the cold. For three months he had the urge to talk to you, to touch you, but he held on because he knew it was right for you, but at that moment he was fucking himself for what was right. He wouldn’t let the woman of his life walk alone on the street, in that cold. He walked over to the Dodge, he sped the car and approached you. He did not have to honk, because you knew the engine sound of the Dodge 78 well. You thought to ignore and keep walking, but the truth was, you needed to be close to him. You stopped walking as the car parked beside you on the sidewalk.

Jungkook reached for the backseat and took out a jacket. He got out of the vehicle and turned around, approaching you. As much as he wanted to pick you up and kiss you, he just helped you put on his jacket. You still sniffed and refused to lift your head, but didn’t think twice before stepping into the car in silence as he opened the passenger door for you.

He wasn’t running this time, he was in no hurry to get anywhere.

“Why are you doing this?” You asked after twenty minutes that Jungkook was just roaming the city. He drew his attention from the street to look at you who had eyes and a red nose before turning his attention back to the road with a shrug.

"I couldn’t leave you alone on the street at this time and in the cold."

“Why do you care?”

“Because I love you.”

"Then why did you break up with me?" Your voice cracked as you said that, shrinking again and crying. He drove for another few minutes to park his car in front of a park and turn off the engine. He remained silent, listening to the sniffles echoing through the car. He then finally took a deep breath and began to speak.

"The day you left that house, my life was over, (Y/N)!" He started, staring out of the car through the front window. "I didn’t ... I didn’t want to break up with you, you know what you are for me. You know how important you’re to me.”

“If I were really important, you wouldn’t have left me." You said interrupting him. Jungkook immediately turned to you, his eyebrows drooping and his jaw clenched, not believing what he was hearing. You shrugged into the seat, not looking at him. "You just had to talk to me, if you really cared, you wouldn’t have left me."

"I know you're hurt, I know a part of you must hate me, but never say that I don’t care about you." He said putting his hand on your chin, turning your face toward him, forcing you to look at him. As he looks into your eyes, he can see various feelings passing through them, anger, pain, fear, sadness. But he could also see that affection you had whenever you looked at him. “I did what I did to protect you. Your parents are dead because of me, but they wouldn’t be if I hadn’t come into your life.”

"Stop it, Jungkook.” You growled, growing angry. You left the car, slamming the door behind you, leaning against the hood. Jungkook frowned and left, going after you. “Can you stop acting like you regret meeting me?” You asked turning to him with your arms crossed. “I know the fact that someone murdered them was because of my connection to your family. And I honestly blamed you in the beginning, then I started to blame myself, because if it was really someone else's fault, it would be mine because I took the ride.” You said walking up to him, it was your turn to hold his chin and direct his gaze to yours. “I agreed to date you, I chose to continue with you after finding out what you and your friends were doing.”

“(Y/N) ...” He tried to argue and pull away, but you pushed him and held him against the car door. You were the only person in the world who could intimidate him.

“Do you regret loving me, Jeon Jungkook?

“Of course not.” He answered without hesitation.

“Good, because I don’t regret accepting you, I don’t regret having left my parents' house to be with you, I don’t regret anything that I did with you and for you. But the most important thing is that I don’t regret loving you.” And at that moment his eyes seemed to shine, with the glow it always had when he heard you say that loved him, and a smile threatened to leave his lips. “I love you, I cannot stand being without you anymore, I cannot bear to pretend I forgot you. I know what are the risks of being with you, but I don’t really care.”

“It's risky, baby ...”

"Life is risky, Jungkook, there's no point in always running the risk, one day we have to face them all. If we don’t take risks, we will not live." You said putting both hands on the back of the boy's neck, pulling him closer. "You always let me make my choices, so let me choose that too, let me choose to be with you."

And so he grabbed your face, sealing your lips in a passionate and loving kiss, a kiss that made your bodies wake up from all that sadness, making you both realize that that moment was real and not a hallucination of your minds.

"I need you." You whispered between his lips. "I love you. I need you now, Jungkook. I need to feel you inside me."

He moaned in response, moving away. He opened the car door and pulled the seat forward, throwing himself into the back seat, sitting up in the middle of it, with his legs spread wide. He flashed a wink and a smile at you before hitting his palms on his thighs, beckoning you to sit there. You went in and closed the door, just threw his jacket on the floor of the car. You ended up banging your head on the roof of the car and laughed as you lifted your dress up to your waist and placed one leg on either side of Jungkook's waist, sitting on his lap, putting pressure on his cock.

Your hands thrust into his hair as your lips were together again in a fierce kiss. Jungkook's hands came up to your waist, causing you to move and rub between your pussy and his hard jeans-covered cock, making you both groan with the sensation of pleasure. He broke the kiss, lowering his lips down your neck and shoulders, nibbling, sucking, licking and kissing your exposed skin as you moaned his name, lower than he would like.

“You look beautiful in this dress, but if you don’t get it off in the next two seconds, I'll tear it up.” He said with his hands on the hem of your dress, ready to take it off. You laughed, raised your arms a little, and let him take it out. “No bra? So naughty baby.” He whispered, grabbing your breasts and gently squeezing them into his hands. "You have no idea how much I missed it, my love.” Jungkook began to run his tongue between your breasts making your whole body shiver and a moan come from your lips.

“Ah Jungkookie.” You moaned grabbing his hair as you felt his tongue around one of your nipples as his hand played with the other.  “Please."

“Are you begging already, baby? I have not even started.”

“I need you, I missed you.”

“Me too, princess.” He whispered back to kiss you. You lifted your hip slightly, so he was able to open the zipper of his pants and push it down with his underwear. He gripped your waist while you used your hand to position him at your entrance. “So wet, baby. Oh fuck.” He groaned loudly as you sat down on his lap all the way in. It was so good that he held you still for a few seconds, not wanting to cum so fast. "So tight baby, damn it! So wet.” He moaned still holding you. “My dick missed that pussy.”

“Can I move? I need more, love."

“You want to ride on that dick, baby?" You groaned in response and he let go of your waist, giving you permission to do what you wanted. So you started to move on his lap, rolling, bouncing and rubbing as he clung to your neck and squeezed your breasts. “Yeah baby, use this dick to fuck that tight pussy, like the greedy little bitch you are.”

“I love it.” You groaned smiling and squinting, while increasing the speed of movement.

"Do you love that dick, baby?"

"I love this dick, baby. I love it when it fills me, oh shit." You moaned as Jungkook moved his hips toward yours, taking a deep thrust. "Fuck me, Jungkook, fast and hard."

"As you wish." He whispered, grabbed your waist and began to move against you, using his strength to get in and out of you. You moaned loudly, grabbing his shoulders and closing your eyes, just feeling the pleasurable friction between you.

"Baby ..." You groaned tightly around his cock. “Oh God."

“I'm almost there too, Princess ... Cum for me, my love.”

And without him having to say another word, you tossed your head back, digging your nails into the back of his neck as you felt the surge of ecstasy running through your body, making you shout his name and your legs tremble. Jungkook tightened his hands around your hips and groaned as you let his liquid inside you, slowing his movements until it stopped, both of you without air. He hugged your body, placing his face between your breasts as you thrust your face into his hair.

"Can I still be your bride?" You whispered through his hair. Jeon pulled back a little, pulling the hair from your sweaty face, before stroking your cheek and smiling.

"You never ceased to be."

He is here. That was the first thought you had when you woke up the next morning. You turned to the side and saw Jungkook sleeping soundly. The night before was tiring for both of you. You smiled and kissed him on the cheek before rising slowly so as not to wake the boy by your side. You looked at his watch and it was still eight o'clock in the morning.

You went down to the kitchen to make breakfast. You couldn’t take your smile off your face, being with him again was as if the light had entered your life again, even if it came in the form of a fallen angel.

As soon as you stepped on the floor of the living room, the doorbell rang and you frowned, staring at the door. You were not expecting anyone, and it was Saturday morning, who would be there that hour?

Forgetting that you were wearing only panties and bra, you opened the door, facing Jimin. You stared at him and he didn’t look happy at all, he had his eyebrows down and his jaw clenched. When he got there and saw Jungkook's car parked, he knew something was happening, but seeing you in your panties and bra confirmed his theory.

“Are you together again?” He asked dryly and directly. You sighed, you had no reason to deny it, so you just shook your head. Jimin glanced at the street, before turning red toward her. "I thought we were making some progress, (Y/N). I thought ... I thought you liked me.”

"And I like you, Jimin. But I love him. And you knew that from the beginning ...”

"He hurt you, (Y/N), for god sake.” Jimin screamed, throwing his hands up, his eyes wide, unable to believe that this was happening. "Don’t you remember how you cried every night because of him? Because I remember it very well. You cannot want this for your life, he will only hurt you even more ...”

“What the fuck?” Jungkook's voice behind you caught the attention of the two of you. You turned back, watching him coming down the stairs, a furious look on his face. His gaze did not leave Jimin as he walked toward him. Standing next to you, he held out the shirt he was about to wear for you and you picked it up, confused as to why he was giving you that, that's when you looked at your own body and saw that you were all in your underwear. You hurried to get dressed while Jungkook stopped in front of the door, blocking Jimin's sight.

“You know you'll only hurt her.” Jimin said, not intimidated by the psychopathic look Jungkook carried on his face.

"I don’t care what you think. Go away while you still can.” Jungkook growled, pointing to the street.

"And if I do not want …"

"Jimin." You pushed Jungkook gently to the side, and looked at the blonde. "Please do not make it any harder. You know what will happen if you try to make me choose between you and him.”

Jimin seemed to be taken aback by your response. He then sighed and shook his head. He turned his back and walked down the porch stairs to his car and out of there. Jungkook grabbed your arm and pulled you inside, closing the door and pushing you against it. He grabbed your wrists and pinned them to the wood, making you breath out of breath.

Jungkook sighed heavily and studied your face for a few seconds. It was visible that he was annoyed at something, you just couldn’t tell if it was because you were in your panties and bra when you opened the door, or because the person who saw you half naked, was another man.

"You fucked him?" He asked, making you eyes widen. You did not have to answer, because your facial expression said it all. Jungkook narrowed his eyes and licked his lips, releasing the air heavily.

"You told me to stay with someone else."

"So now you decide to do what I say?" He asked in a low, almost menacing voice, making your whole body shiver. Oh he was angry.

"That depends, if I like your order, yes, I will obey." You said petulant. Jungkook's face darkened and you lost your breath as you faced those big black eyes staring at you like a hunter looks at his prey. At that moment Jeon thought of a thousand and one ways to deal with that situation, but only one of these solutions would please you both, so he took a step back and pointed to the couch.

“Put your hands on the arm of the sofa and bend over, now!” He commanded his voice low, his eyes clouded by something you knew well, desire. You just blinked a few times and obeyed. So your ass stayed up, and you waited anxiously to know what he would do to you.

"You know how much annoys me know that another man touched you as I do?" He asked stopping behind you, holding your hips and pushing him against you. You sighed and nodded, confirming that you did. "And yet you did?" He asked and you nodded again. Jungkook let out a cold chuckle and stroked your shriveled skin. "Did you enjoy fucking Jimin?" He asked and you nodded again, letting out a loud moan as Jeon hit you with a strong slap in the ass, which made your pussy clench instantly. "I'm going to ask you again, baby, did you enjoy fucking Jimin, hm?" He asked in a low voice, now caressing and admiring the mark his hand formed on your skin. “Did you like his cock fucking that tight pussy?" You nodded again and yelled as his hand hit you once more in the ass. You started to gasp. It was impressive as with him, your horny never had limits. "Are you sure about that, baby?" He growled and you shook your head. "No?"

"No."

"Then why did you let him touch what is mine?"

“Because you asked me to forget you. And I was trying." You answered by moving your head a little to the side, looking at him over your shoulder, staring into dark eyes, full of jealousy and lust. "But nothing and no one could make me forget you."

"That doesn’t get you out of punishment, baby. You want to know what I'm going to do with you?" You nodded frantically. "I'll show you who owns this pussy. I'll fuck you until the neighbors have decorated my name. I'm going to fuck you until you forget that shit and remember that I'm the only one who can make you cum. And at the end of it, baby, you will not even remember the name of that little bastard. "

Oh boy.

The noise of your panties being ripped made you whole body tremble with desire. Jungkook wouldn’t even need to touch you to get you wet because you were already soaked.

"Look at that pussy, all wet, and I didn’t even touch you baby. My slaps left you like this, love? Or it was the fact that you saw me drowning in jealousy? "

"Both," you whispered, feeling his index finger caress your entrance.

"I'm about to fuck you in a way I've never done before. Can you handle it?”  He asked and you looked over your shoulder again, nodding. It was when you felt him penetrating hard, causing you to open and tighten around him at the same time.

"Shit," you murmured, rolling your eyes and squeezing your fingers on the arm of the sofa, moving your hips to get used to it inside you. Your cunt pulsing and threatening to give you an orgasm faster than expected.

"Give me your hair," he ordered, and you obeyed, lifting your head and tossing your hair back. Jungkook gathered each of your strands of hair in his hand and then wrapped it in his fist, pulling them lightly. "Are you ready?"

"Yes" You answered.

Jungkook laughed before using his wandering hand to grasp your waist. When he began to fuck you, you tried to hold back your groans, but the first few seconds he was in you, you were filled with pleasure and did not hold back, groaning loudly as Jungkook bit his lip and concentrated on digging deeply and with strength in you.

With every thrust, you went up to heaven and came back.

He pulled your hair hard and growled, making you bend your back and stand as he fucked you from behind.

"Say my name," he growled in your ear.

"Jungkook."

"Scream my name, now," he ordered, thrusting harder.

"Jungkook ... fuck." You screamed as your legs began to shake, bringing your hands back and holding onto Jungkook's hips, wanting even more movement, even stronger.

"Who you belong to?" He asked in your ear.

"To you."

"Who this fucking pussy belong to, (Y/N)?"

"You, Jungkook."

"That's it baby, now I want you to be a good girl and cum over my dick." And so he pushed your shoulder, causing you to bend again, loosening your hair and grabbing your waist, popping it in, making your moans grow even louder until you finally jumped in a burst of pleasure, screaming his name, not being able to remember anything else, as he'd said would happen.

Things were starting to get back to normal again.

all rights reserved © katebacks | 2018 — no reposting and/or modifying of any form on any medium is allowed. no translations allowed.

Under The Mat  (M) - 1

— pairing | Jeon Jungkook /Reader

— word c | 5.600

— genre | Ceo!Jungkook, angst , Smut, series.

— summary |  He was your boss and you hated him, but he knew that wasn't exactly what you felt.

— warnings/tags | Adult content, oral (female receiving), eventual smut, low slang words, cheating, mentions of alcohol use.

| 1 | 2 |

This is wrong. This is fucking wrong. You have to stop it. You have to put an end to it now, (Y/N). Yes, this is what you will do now. You will enter this room, you will tell him that you don’t want to do this anymore, and if he tries to persuade you, you will tell him to fuck off. You're strong enough to do that, (Y/N). I believe you. These were the words you repeated to yourself in your mind as you stood in front of your boss's office door.

You squeezed the paper between your fingers, distressed by what you were about to do. You worked in that company at Jeon Jungkook's command for almost two years as his secretary, but you literally couldn't take it anymore. He was the most stupid and rude man you had ever met on earth. He was smug, cocky, and made you as a maid. He would send you to pick up his clothes from the washing-house, distribute coffee to his partners at meetings, he would call you late at night, drunk, ordering you to pick him up wherever he was.

And because of all that, your relationship with your boyfriend was worn out. You were always tired, never had time for him or to take care of you. You were tired of Jeon's ironical answers and the insults you were force to listen. You deserved more than that.

It was almost the end of your shift when you finally got up the courage to talk to him. You took a deep breath, knocked on the door announcing your presence, and entered the room. Jungkook was sitting in his chair, his back to that big window that showed the city. He was focused on something on the computer, and didn't seem to mind your presence, which you were used to. And as much as he was an asshole, you would never deny that he was one of the most handsome men you had ever seen in your life.

All the women in that company dreamed of working as close to him as you were, but none could do what you do, he had said it himself, and that had been the only compliment he had given you since you began working for him. He was tall, with black hair and dark eyes. He was literally the only man on the planet who looked great wearing anything from a suit to a sweatshirt. He was smart, spoke three different languages, never needed a calculator to do the math, was good at video games, and won every game he played. He had a great taste for music, clothes, cars and places to travel. And his smile could charm anyone, even those with the hardest heart. If he wasn't an ogre, he would be the man of your dreams.  

"Mister Jeon." You said, making him nod his head without taking his eyes off the computer.

"What?" He asked in a dull voice.

“I came to bring you this.” You said walking toward his desk and placing the envelope next to your computer screen, and taking a few steps back. And he didn't even move his eyes to know what it was. You waited for two or three minutes, and when you realized that he had no interest in looking at the paper you had put on the table, you decided to talk, after all, he didn't seem to care. “It's my resignation letter.”

And like a lightning, his eyes left the computer screen and went toward you.  Now it looked like you had his attention. He stared at you for a few moments, watching you with raised eyebrows, trying to figure out if this was a joke. You hated it when he looked at you like that, it was like he could read your mind and judge you for what you were thinking.

And when he realized it wasn't a joke, he looked down at the envelope, took it but didn't open it.

"Why are you quitting?" He asked looking at the envelope in his hands. Because you are a selfish, heartless pig. You thought about saying, but preferred to avoid disagreement.

"Personal reasons." You said it and he immediately looked back at you, this time with a confused expression, as if he didn't know you had a life outside that building. "I will work until the end of the contract and …"

"No." He said gruffly, interrupting you. "If you want to leave, leave. If you really want to resign, you can get your things and leave, you don't have to go back to work the last days of the contract." You were left with nothing to say, even though you spent so much time taking bad answers, you were still surprised at how rude he could be. So there was nothing more you could say to him, you just nodded and turned your heels out of the room.

You were shaking inside. You took all your stuff on that table and entered the elevator, and as soon as the doors closed, you couldn't help but smile, with relief taking over your body, thinking that you would no longer have to accept Jeon's ignorance. You were free.

A week had passed since you had resigned, and even though you were happy that you no longer had to wake up at 3 am with your boss calling you to pick him up from some brothel, you felt strange, as if you were missing something.

You were in a nightclub with some of your friends and your boyfriend, one of your friends had just been promoted and you were celebrating.

"That guy's looking this way since we got here." Irina said, getting you out of your thoughts and looking in the direction she was looking at, only to be startled to see who it was, Jeon Jungkook in flesh and blood. He was sitting on the other side of the club in the VIP area. He was all in black, and he was alone, holding a glass of drink in his hand. And he was stunning, as always. "He looks like an angel." She said, amazed at his beauty, as everyone always were. He was really looking in your direction. Maybe he were drunk and thought he knew you, or were just thinking of a thousand and one ways to kill you because you resigned. You didn't know what to think about him staring at you, but you knew your heart pounded when you saw him after a week without looking at that beautiful face. If he wasn't so bad, he would be so good to you…

“Yeah, he looks like an angel, walk like an angel, talk like an angel, but be wise, he's the devil in disguise.” You said with a hint of irritation, taking your alcoholic drink in one gulp.

"Did you just quote Elvis Presley? And why do you say that? Do you know him?” She asked curiously and you peeked at him, seeing that he was still looking at you before you looked back at her.

"He's my former boss." Irina widened her eyes and looked alternately between you and Jungkook.

“He is the famous Jeon fucking Jungkook?” You shook your head nodding and she started laughing like crazy, making you arch your eyebrows.  "Fuck (Y/N), I thought he was handsome, but not that much. He looks like a Greek god."

"Yes, he is Hades, and he made my life his hell." You responded, looking at the others at the table who were talking to each other and were entertained. You glanced at Hoseok, your boyfriend, who was laughing at some joke one of the guys had told you before turning to Irina again. "Do you remember Hobi's birthday that I couldn't go because I was in a meeting?" She nodded. "I had told Jungkook that I would have to leave early to go celebrate my boyfriend's birthday, but then he went there and set up a meeting at the same time as the party, and I had a bad fight that day."

"I think he wanted you just for him." Irina laughed and you laughed scornfully.

“No, he was just bored and seeing my suffering was his entertainment.”

"But damn, he's so hot. I need to have sex with him." She said biting her lip and getting up from the chair.. You just shrugged, not caring with what she was going to do, deciding to join your friends' conversation.

It was not long before she returned, totally upset.

"He dumped me." She said loudly, catching the attention of everyone at the table.

"He who?" Rosie asked, completely confused.

"(Y/N)'s former boss. He dumped me, said he doesn't have ballad girls." She said annoyed. Hoseok's arm around your waist tensed and you looked at him as he began to look around, probably looking for Jeon. If there was one person who hated Jungkook more than you, that was Hoseok. He hated the fact that Jeon always had a way of interfering with your dates and appointments, ruining special dates and making you leave him to go to your boss. He had been so relieved that you had resigned that he almost exploded with joy to know that you were all his again.

"What is this son of a bitch doing here?" He asked threatening to get up, but you grabbed his arm, making him stay in place.

"Let's not ruin our night because of him, please." You asked. Hoseok sighed and nodded, he did not want to fight because of your former boss.

…

A short time later, everyone had forgotten what had happened and returned to drink. Everyone at the table except you was drunk, laughing at the walls. You excused yourself and walked toward the ladies' room. The music wasn't so loud inside and your ears thanked for it. As you entered the cabin and closed the door, you heard the bathroom door open, the loud music burst into the room, but as soon as the door closed, everything was quiet again, you could hear only the footsteps of someone approaching the cabin where you were.

When you opened the cabin, you let out a startled scream when you saw Jungkook standing in front of you, arms folded.

"Jeon ... I mean, Mr. Jeon, what are you doing here?" You asked wide-eyed, feeling that your heart was almost out of your mouth.

"You spent the whole night ignoring me, you didn't come to me to greet me, so I came to you."

"In the ladies' room?" You asked with a frown and he just shrugged, giving you room to get out of the cabin and go to the sink, wash your hands. "Couldn't you have gone to my table?”

"That little shit you call boyfriend is there, I don't like him."

"Don't talk about him like that, he's got a name, it's Hoseok, and he's not a shit." Unlike you, you thought about talking. Jungkook laughed and leaned against the sink beside you, looking at you. Shit, he was again with that look of who was reading your mind.

"Already working elsewhere?"

"No, I want to get some rest before I start working again." You said taking the paper towel to dry your hands, you wanted to get out of there as soon as possible.

"Fine. Rest for another two weeks and return to the company on February 1st."

"I will not go back to work for you, Jungkook." You said calmly and firmly, without even waiting for his reaction, you walked toward the door, but before reaching it, he grasped your arm, turning you to him. “What...”

"That's not how things work. We need to talk." He said angry, his eyebrows drooping and his jaw clenched. On another occasion you would bow your head and accept his demand, but at that moment no, he no longer ran you. You gripped his wrist, pushed his hand away from your arm and lifted your head.

"You're not my boss anymore. You don't rule me. Have a good night, Jungkook."

And so you left, leaving him completely baffled inside the ladies room. As you walked away, you felt you could breathe again and paused at the bar for a drink before returning to the table and joining your friends who were already wondering why you were taking so long. Shortly thereafter you were paying the bill to leave. Being the one who drank the least, you drove Hoseok's car, driving Irina and Rosie home before heading toward the house of your boyfriend who was completely drunk in the passenger seat, almost fainting.

You locked the car and let Hoseok lean on your shoulders, laughing and trying to dodge his hands as you made your way to the porch. As soon as you laid him on the bed, you helped him take off his clothes, leaving only his underwear and he fell asleep. You laughed as you took off your boots, knowing that the next day he would wake up with a terrible headache.

Your cell phone beeped in your pocket and you picked it up, seeing that Jungkook had texted.

Asshole: I'm outside the house waiting for you, we need to talk.

You rolled your eyes, with no patience to argue.

Me: I'm not home.

And seconds later he answered

Asshole: I know. I'm in front of your boyfriend's house.

Unable to believe it, you ran toward the window, seeing the black Jaguar parked behind Hoseok's car. He really was there. How did he know where Hobi lived? You left the room closing the door behind you, not bothering to put on a slipper, and marched out of the house.

“What are you doing here?” You asked leaning over the passenger window, seeing him inside with his cell phone in one hand and the other at the wheel. You almost lost focus when you saw those big venous hands.

"I told you, we need to talk." He said in a boring voice. "Get in the car."

"No, I can't leave. Hoseok drank too much, he may need me. Just leave, really, I don't think we have anything to talk about. I already said I'm not going back to work for you, and there's nothing that you can do to change my mind. "

Jungkook stared straight ahead for a few seconds, his clenched jaw showing that he was even angrier than before. He bit his lip before dropping the phone, pulling the parking brake, turning off the car and getting out of it, making you stand up in confusion.

"Fine. If you don't want to get in the car, I'll get in the house." He said and started walking toward the house, stuffing his car key in his pocket, leaving you wide-eyed, static, watching him enter Hoseok's house. You blinked and then ran back into the house, seeing your former boss looking around the room in disgust. "This asshole has a bad taste for decoration." He said and so looked at you, standing in the living room door. "Everything here is as boring and bland as he is."

"Jungkook, what do you want? Really, I don't understand why you're insisting so much today on talking to me."

"I just don't understand why you don't want to go back to work for me, (Y/N)." He said raising his voice, making you run towards him and use your hand to cover his mouth, afraid that Hoseok would wake up. And as you stared up at the ceiling, trying to hear some noise from upstairs, Jungkook stared at you, analyzing you, as he always did. It was the first time you were so close like that and he was loving it. He then held your wrist away from his mouth, and made you look back at him, realizing that he was really close. That feeling of attraction was no stranger to you, because even though he had been a jerk all this time, Jeon Jungkook was the definition of sexy.

You shook your head, sending those thoughts away and sighed, waving toward the kitchen door. He followed you and watched you grab a glass of water and drink it, a drop escaped from your mouth and down your throat, falling between your breasts, and Jungkook saw it, and that caused something that was already inside him to spread like fire on a dry straw.

"It was because of him that you quit?" He asked, this time in a lower voice, making you duck your head and face the empty glass. "Was he the one who told you to resign? Was he jealous of our relationship?"

"Relationship?" You turned indignant at him. "What relationship, Jungkook? You were my boss and I was your employee. There was never a relationship between us, what the hell are you talking about?”

"Oh please. Are you telling me you never felt this sexual tension between us?" He asked confused and angry at the same time, pointing to the space between you two, making you perplexed. "Are you telling me that in those two years you never realized that I always act different around you?"

"Different how? More asshole than usual? Because that's all you did, Jungkook, you've always been an asshole with me. Always." You said, this time you were raising your voice. And for the first time in the time you knew him, he was silent, so you continued. "Want to know why I resigned? Because you made these two years the worst of my life. You made my life a hell. Your ironies, your insults, your lack of empathy with me hurt me. And all I wanted was to be far away from you, the only thing that made me feel good was to know that at the end of the day I would come home, rest in the arms of the man who loves me, but then you would call me, drunk, out of my shift to pick you up at some bar as if I were your fucking private driver.” You said holding to not scream. Jungkook just remained silent, listening to you, not daring to interrupt. You took a deep breath, trying to calm down before you spoke again.

"You have no idea how much I hate you, Jungkook. God. I hate you so much. And I screamed with joy when I woke up the day after I resigned to see that I would no longer have to endure your arrogance. That I wouldn't have to be your little toy anymore. But, you know what? I pity you. Because you're going to be alone and bitter for the rest of your life, surrounded by fake people who want you for your money, because no one can love a rubbish person like you. Spoiled, cocky, arrogant and spiteful. What's the point of being beautiful on the outside but being so horrible on the inside?”

And then you shut up again, staring at the ceiling, taking a deep breath, almost as if your lungs were bouncing from your chest. It's been a long time since you wanted to say all that. And when you looked at Jungkook, you realized that it was a bad idea to say that to him. He was standing, staring at his feet, his hands in his back pockets and his shoulders slumped. You put your hand over your mouth, realizing that everything you said had been too cruel and that you had probably hurt him.

"Oh my god, Jungkook, I'm sorry. I ... I'm so sorry."

"It's all right." He said softly, lifting his head, making your heart clench at the sight of his watery eyes. He smiled at you before turning around and leaving the kitchen. You sighed sadly that you were the reason for that and when you finally went after him, he was already getting in the car and leaving.

Yes, he had made you suffer for a long time, but you never wanted to make him went through the same.  You scratched your head, having nothing else to do, then walked into the house, leaning against the living room door, staring at the empty room and hearing only the crickets singing. You closed your eyes in regret and locked your jaw. You hated to be the reason for the sadness of others, so surely you couldn't sleep that night.

You sat in the living room chair until daybreak. As soon as Hoseok woke up already complaining about the headache, you told him that you need to go to your apartment because your friend was waiting there and then took a cab.

After taking your shower, you decided that you would talk to Jungkook, apologize once again for what you had told him. You put on a black skirt, white blouse and boots, something you would never wear during your work hours.

As soon as you arrived at the company, just over eight in the morning, everyone who worked there greeted you, happy to see you there again.

"Good to see you here, came to visit us?" The receptionist said as soon as you approached.

"I actually came to talk to Jeon. Has he arrived?"

"Not yet. If you want you can wait upstairs."

"Don't you have to tell his secretary first?" The woman laughed.

"He hasn't hired another secretary yet. I think he's still hoping for you to come back."

You thanked her and got in the elevator. When you stepped on the floor of his office, you felt nostalgic to see your old empty table. You now remembered some things you had forgotten, like every time you got stuck in papers and couldn't go out to lunch, Jungkook brought your food. And when you stayed up late in meetings, he would take you to dinner. You remembered the one-week trip to Cancun that he gave you as a birthday gift.  And that he was always by your side when you needed him, like the day your younger brother went to the hospital and he took you there, and didn't leave your side, even though he had been quiet the whole time. Yes, he had been a bad person to you sometimes, but yes, he was different with you in some ways.

"Something happened?" Jungkook's voice made you jump and turn back, seeing that he was standing in front of the elevator door. He was a mess. His hair was messy, his tie was untied and he was carrying his jacket in one hand. What you said to him should have really destabilized him, because that was the first time you saw the great Jeon Jungkook all messy.

"No, I just wanted to talk to you." You said biting your lower lip, getting ready to get an ironic answer, but to your surprise, he just nodded and pointed toward his office. As soon as you walked in, he closed the door behind him and walked toward his desk, tossing his jacket on the small leather sofa beside him. Before he sat down, he started fixing his tie, but you knew he wasn't very good at it, so you approached."Can I help you with this?" You asked and he nodded, letting his hands fall to his sides and letting you fix it. You both kept quiet, Jungkook was trying not to look at you and then looked at the bathroom behind you. The door was open and the sink mirror was reflecting you bare legs, which made him swallow hard and try to look at another place, getting restless.

When you were done, you took a few steps away and he thanked you.

"So what did you want to talk to me about?"

"I want to apologize to you, about yesterday." You started as soon as he sat in his chair. You kept standing in front of him.

"No need to apologize, I deserved it."

"Deserving it or not, I shouldn't have said that. I'm not a bad person and I would never say anything of that kind with the intention of hurting anyone, not even you.”

"So you didn't want to say that to me?" He asked, lifting his head a little to look at you and for some reason, you felt like laughing and ended up smiling.

"I wanted to, but I shouldn't have said." You said it and he laughed shaking his head. "Seriously, I'm sorry."

"It's fine. I understand."And then you both fell silent and stared at each other.  This was the first time you two talked like two normal people. And you liked that.

“But I'm still curious about one thing.”

“And what is it?”

“Why do you do so much matter that I may go to work for you again?”

"Because of all the people I've worked with, all the people I've met, you're the only one who didn't care to stand by me, to flatter me. And I like that about you." He said with a shrug. "You do your job and that's it, you don't ask me anything anymore, you don't ask me anything else. Actually, I was the one who demanded too much of you, (Y/N). And you always remained so professional, even if sometimes I blatantly flirted with you, you were still there, not giving a damn about me. And it fascinates me. You fascinates me.”

You blushed when you heard that. Did he flirt with you? How did you never notice?

"What, were you surprised that there is a woman in this world who is not attracted to you?" You asked, trying to look cool. Jungkook gave a low, ironical laugh, as he used to do when he wanted to mock something.

"Oh, you were attracted to me, but you never realized that because you were too busy hating me."

And without restraint, you shyly bit your lower lip and looked elsewhere as you felt your face burn.  Well, maybe he was right, and if he really was, you'd be fucked, so you understood that this was the time to get the hell out of that room.

"Well ..." You rubbed the back of your neck, bewildered.  "I'm glad we're okay ... hm ... I better go." You said turning your back and walking towards the door, but Jungkook was faster, running towards the door and resting his hand on it, not letting you open it, standing behind you, who froze to feel his breath near your ear. Your heart started beating fast against your chest, and you almost thought it would jump out. That was weird. Jungkook was acting weird. Why did he look so different now?

"Wait (Y/N), don’t you think I deserve to speak too?" He whispered and that made your whole body tingle. You swallowed and turned to face him, taking a few steps back and knocking your back on the door. You fell silent so he could talk. “I won't apologize for the way I've acted with you in the last two years, because no excuse will change what has already happened, but god, you have no idea how hard it was for me to spend all this time looking at you walking around in that tight skirt, and do nothing. I'm not saying you were trying to tease me or anything, after all that was your uniform, but that didn't stop me from imagining you naked. ”

“Jungkook...”

"Shh, babe, let me finish, hm?" He asked placing his index finger over your lips. “I just wish I could get you on all fours on that couch. I just wish I could come every day and kiss you, I just wish I had you for me, if only for a day.”He whispered moving his face close to yours, giving you a peck.

"Jungkook… I have Hoseok." You said, almost begging him to walk away.

“I know, honey.” He whispered giving you one more peck. "It's fine." And one more. "I won't tell him, I promise." And he kissed your neck, leaving wet red marks, making you automatically put your hands on his shoulders. “It'll be all under the mat until the day you're ready to be mine for the rest of your life.” And so he grabbed the back of your neck and pulled you into a kiss you didn't refuse to give.

Wasting no time, you dropped your hands to his waist, tugging at his shirt and pulling it out of his pants, unbuttoning as he walked backward until his thighs hit the edge of the table. Jungkook broke the kiss and pulled you, spinning and putting you onto the table, pushing the papers, pens, and even the computer to the floor just to make room for you to lie there.

He pulled your skirt up, and pulled your waist, fitting between your legs, leaning over you, kissing your neck again, kissing down to your breasts. His big hands massaging your thighs as you arched you back and moaned beneath him, gripping his hair and pulling. The telephone, which had been the only object on the table that had not been thrown to the ground, rang. Jungkook let out an angry growl and had no intention of answering.

"It could be important." You said and he chuckled, taking his mouth off your breast and looking at you.

"The only thing that matters to me now is to eat out your pussy, honey." He said shoving his hand under your skirt and pulling your panties down. Jungkook rested one knee on the floor and put his face between your legs, letting his lips touch with almost desperate delicacy the soggy spot between your legs. making you sit with your hands resting on the table and head thrown back, moaning. His tongue is hot, and when he moves it from the bottom up, slowly makes you feel him stimulate every tiny point of pleasure there, the sound that drips from his lips is pure desire. And when Jungkook finally reaches your clit, the way he sucks that point makes you lie down on the table, letting your head hang on the other side as he puts your thighs over his shoulders and reaches your hands on the table, lacing your fingers.

That was too wonderful. His touch made it sound like this was the first time anyone was giving you an oral, as if all the other times you'd received was nothing like it like it was nothing like Jungkook. The phone starts ringing again and you try to use one hand to answer it, but Jungkook squeezes your fingers, signaling that he wouldn't let you do any of that.

"Let it ring." He whispers against your pussy before using his tongue on it again. Your body shudders with the horniness, looking like you're electrified. He brings one of your hands up to his hair, letting you hold the black strands between your fingers, letting you take control, pulling him closer. The feeling intensifies each time his lips run through it, and with every second you feel the climax get stronger and you can't think of anything but cum in his tongue.

"I ... Oh ..." You could barely speak as he increased the speed of his tongue, and when you realize it, your body feels like free-falling, the adrenaline rush, your whole body shudders in uncoordinated spasms, and you can not help yourself and moan as loud as you had done in life.

Jungkook is pleased to see you so vulnerable like that. He stands and holds your arms, making you sit up. He holds your face and kisses you warmly, letting you hold his waist as he reaches down to your shoulders, caressing your skin. It was so soft, so smooth, you were so inviting, and he could hardly believe he was finally having you there, just for him.

"Mr. Jeon-oh my god." The voice of a third person made Jungkook look over his shoulder at once, seeing the receptionist standing wide-eyed at the office's door. He hugs your body protectively, standing in front of you and preventing her from seeing you in the state you were in.

"Close it." He growled, glaring at the standing woman.

"I'm so sorry…"

"Fucking close it. Get out." He shouted angrily, causing the girl to jump and leave the room, slamming the door.  Jungkook breathed for a second and moved away from you a few inches, analyzing you. "You okay?" He asked and those words made you break out of a trance and finally start thinking about what had just happened. Your former boss had given you an oral in his office on his desk, you were almost caught and the worst, you had cheated on Hoseok.

“Oh no.” You put your hands on your face, feeling ashamed of yourself, not believing you had been able to do something like that.

Jungkook realized that you didn't look happy like a few seconds ago and took your hands away from your face, looking at your red face. And before he could say anything, you jumped off the table, moving away from him.

"That shouldn’t have happened." You said with tears in your eyes, walking backwards towards the door, making Jungkook frown. "Please forget that this happened." You asked before lightning out of the room, leaving a disheveled, confused and frustrated man standing in the middle of the office. You didn't even want to use the elevator, using the emergency stairs to leave, running out of the building without even looking back.

Jungkook sat on the table and sighed, running his hands through his messy hair as he growled in rage and confusion. He had come so close to finally getting what he wanted. He was definitely going to fire that woman because she had gotten in his way.

And so looking at the floor, his eyes fell on a piece of black lace near his feet. Your panties. He smirked and bent down to pick it up.

Something was telling him that it was not over yet.

Literally reminds me of this song!!!

His Girlfriend's Roommate 02: Roommate to the Rescue - KSJ (M)

Pairing: Player, fuckboy!Seokjin X fem!Reader

Summary:

To Seokjin, Love is an abstract concept and love at first sight is as unreal as a unicorn, only there in the fairytales. He likes to play around and fuck around, and he calls it 'discovering'. But then he discovers you, his girlfriend's roommate and guess what? he finds himself falling, that too, hard. Only problem is, you don't seem to care much even though he swears he finds you looking at him on occasions too.

Theme: one-sided pining, fluff, smut. Jin is stuck between his girlfriend and her roommate lol

Word count: 1974

Warnings: Strong language, mentions of alcohol consumption, 18+ content (minors DNI), mentions of cheating.

A/N:

Jin is going to do something about his helpless crush on our reader. Again, this is a Jin's POV but we will be getting reader's pov in future as well. <3

Series Masterlist

Previous Chapter

It has been a month since Seokjin has met you and got absolutely smitten by you. For the first couple of days, he has tried to find out why the hell he got to feel whatever he was feeling within just 2 minutes of conversation. He couldn't fathom down the reasons. He even googled up on the possibility of having a love at first sight, but the search engine only said men take only 40 seconds to fall in love. Okay, so he was one of those dumb men now. He then slowly started to give up finding out how you managed to make him feel like that. He rather focused on the factors that might have drawn him to you. You were pretty, the most beautiful woman he has ever seen and just the thought brought a smile to his face. However, he was never the man to fall for pretty faces only. He is a man that goes for charismatic women like Jiya. So, if it's not your face? Then is it the way you smiled at him? Or is it the way you need absolutely no makeup to make his eyes pop out of their sockets? Or the way you managed to have a very casual yet to the point conversation upon your first meet? Again, there is no answer. So, he quits thinking of it anyway.

The next couple of days, he tries to push away your thoughts and focus only on Jiya but you somehow managed to get into his head without any invitation, that's a bad thing. But the worse thing is that he only smiled when you played on his mind. He tried not to think of the way you waved him a little goodbye with your cute sweater paws when he left the next morning but nothing happened. It's only you and you that plays in his mind whenever he is not too occupied with his work and Jiya.

After initiating failed attempts of putting a stop to whatever he was feeling for you, he decided to give it a go. He decided to figure it out by getting close to you. Maybe he doesn't have an answer for all the questions that go around in his mind regarding you but it is evident that you managed to make him feel something very different, only if he denies his love at first sight. So, it's only justified if he gives you a chance. Gives himself a chance and finds out what is it he feels for his girlfriend's roommate.

For the rest of the month he showed up at your shared apartment more and more. Every Friday or Saturday he is there. For this one month it has been a ritual of having dinner with you and Jiya and he feels way too good about it all. You three usually eat, laugh, gossip and then Jiya pulls him to her room where they get deeds done. And the next morning you make coffee for everyone before he leaves for his home.

And in this one month of knowing you better has done nothing to push his butterflies away from him, if anything it only intensified, and the butterflies only increased. And the fact that you are single, does not help him at all. The more he observes you, the more he sinks into this unknown feeling for you. He absolutely goes berserk over the way you trace your lower lip with your index finger when you try to remember something or the way your hair curls on the edges after you release your bun or the way you sit with your legs crossed even when you are sitting on the couch or the way you pout without even knowing or the way you scrunch your nose when Jiya gets all "cheesy" with him. He loves everything and everything about you. And he learnt a lot too. He learnt that you are an ambivert, a decent drinker, quite chatty if the company is comfortable, and you are so fucking intelligent. God! You are just irresistible, and you really rile him up at times but it's peculiar how Seokjin doesn't feel any urgency about getting into your pants just like he is used to feel for other women. You definitely are different. You make him impatient and teach him how to be patient at the same time. At the end of the month, he concludes that, he likes you. And it's the first time he is liking someone not just because of her great body or the possibility of a good fuck. He likes you genuinely, like a man likes a woman and wants to share a romantic relationship with them. The thought scares Seokjin, since he never really thought of loving someone enough to pursue a serious relationship but you are different. And you are everything he can think of.

It's another of the Fridays and this time Jiya wants to spend it with Jin, only Jin. Since she is technically his girlfriend, he can't say no to her. But he is very annoyed and a bit sad that he will not get to see you this week.

The beat of music almost hammers Jin's head. For the first time in a while he is not enjoying clubbing rather he is wondering what are you upto now. Since it's almost 10 pm, you must have come back from work, maybe you are resting on the couch with a bowl of your favourite cheese garlic chips or maybe you are already exhausted and sleeping in your room, tugged in your lilac fluffy blanket. Jin's thoughts stop processing as Jiya tugs on his arm,

"Baby, let's get dancing." She whines. Jin resists a bit but then gives up. Jiya is a party animal and Jin knows refusing her will only lead to unnecessary tantrums, since the girl is quite childish and not as mature as you.

By the end of the night, she is knocked out. Jin finds himself struggling to handle Jiya. She is drunk as hell and doesn't wanna leave the bar. She keep on asking the bartender to give her more shots, which Jin refuses and she yells. The girl almost ends up making a scene.

Jin pinches the bridge of his nose and then an idea pops up in his head, you. He takes out Jiya's phone from her purse and unlocks it with her thumb impression. Then he looks for your number, yes, he couldn't ask for your number in this one month. It just felt awkward to him, for the very first time.

You recieve after the second ring, "You should be grinding on your boyfriend now, why are you calling me?" You say with a playful voice without any hey or hello.

Jin chuckles at your teasing and says, "Hey Y/N. It's me, Jin." You go silent and Jin can imagine you widening your eyes in shock.

"O-oh hey Jin. Ah… I'm sorry. What's up? Wait… where's Jiya? Don't tell me she's passed out again!" You say within a single breath.

"That's exactly what we are upto." Jin sighs glancing at his drunk girlfriend asking the bartender for another shot yet again, "I am sorry, I know you're probably resting now but could you come and help me with her? I don't really know how to…" he pauses again, "I have never been in such a situation before."

"It's alright Jin. I am still out anyway since we just had a team dinner. Tell me where you are, I'll take a cab right away." You assure him.

"Oh okay. We are at the Blue Moon bar. 5 minutes from Gangnam subway station." He replies.

"Oh wait! I think I am just two buildings away from you. Oh yes! I can see the building already." You say in a haste and before Jin can say anything you cut the call.

Two minutes feel like forever when you finally stepped into the bar. If Jin was smitten by you before then he is probably drooling now. Black dress pants, black blouse and black loafers adorn your firm and beautiful form. Hair put into a loose bun and lips painted with rosy red. You didn't even bother wearing your blazer anymore, rather you just ran to the bar to rescue your roommate. He can't really focus on anything else rather than how you run to him and place a hand on his shoulder and look at him with those beautiful dark eyes, which make him drown into the unknown. Fuck! You even smell so nice. Jin swears even women wearing tight skimpy dresses couldn't look as sexy as you look into his eyes right now. And once again, he finds himself getting lost by your presence.

"I am sorry Jin, you had to face all these. Let's take her to the car." You say finally removing your hand from his shoulder and it makes him somehow sad.

"It's alright, Y/N. Let's go." That's all he manages to say.

You somehow convince Jiya to leave the bar with promises of more booze from your special collection at home and get her into the car. Once you throw her into the backseat, she is passed out. You take the passenger seat as Jin finally drives towards your shared apartment.

Jin wants to keep his eyes only on the road but he keeps getting distracted by you. The way the headlights of the passing cars illuminate your features, takes his breath away. He knows he shouldn't glance at you every now and then but he can't help it. He only prays that you don't notice it.

It is another round of struggle to get Jiya into the bed but you two accomplish it successfully.

"Coffee?" You ask Jin, to which he nods immediately. He would trade anything in the world for a bit of time with you.

You suggest taking the coffee to the balcony as the night is quite brizzy and you love it.

"Can I ask you something?" Jin starts, sipping his coffee after contemplating whether to ask you or not.

"Yes, sure." You reply without sparing him a glance.

"Why are you still single? I mean, don't get me wrong, I am just curious since you are so pretty and you can get any guy you want." He reasons but in reality he is just way too curious to know if he has a chance or not.

You chuckle, "exactly that. I am single because I don't want any guy at this moment. My fiance broke up with me last year and since then I haven't mustered up the courage to get into a relationship again. And since I am not really the type to get into casual dating or hooking up, I am single. It takes me to fall in love and realize the other person is in love with me too to start a relationship." You pause. And then start again, "You know why my fiance broke up with me?" You pause again and look at Jin dead into his eyes, "because he fell out of love with me." You gave him a sad smile and that makes Seokjin's heart twist in something so complicated. "That is why I have decided I will only fall for a guy who will be totally, crazily, and unapologetically in love with me." The last sentence makes Jin suck in a deep breath. You both don't look away from each other, rather let the night settle into each other's dark eyes.

That's the night Jin decides he will be falling hard for you and make you fall hard for him.

Taglist:

@supersugarytea @phenomenalgirl9 @dreamingofseokjin @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @xmochiloverx @pjiminslove @lizzymizzy-blogg @madinainspire @fairy-jaykay @tea4sykes @@firesighgirl @jinsleftairpod

Idol! Jimin x Reader: Scars (Yoongi's sister au)

Summary: Growing up in a strict household is difficult. Especially when your elder brother is in a place doing something your parents strongly disapprove. Their eyes are always on you. Your brother saves you from them, but you caught the eye of a certain fluffy cheeked member.

A/n: This idea has been sitting in my head for a long time so I finally decided to write it down. There are discussions about mental health, abuse, self harm, so if any of that makes you uncomfortable read at your own discretion.

Also THIS

----------------------------------------------------

"Why can't you be better? You're a worse disappointment than your brother"

"You're worthless"

"Why couldn't you have been born smarter?"

Once again your cries were heard to be echoed in the flat. The pin to your door being put in a hurry, not that you could hear it beyond your own sobs. A warm embrace held you, as you sobbed.

"It's okay. It's okay, they can't get you" Your brother said.

It's been the same for the past week, since he brought you away from your parents. You have been living with your parents for the past 16 years, they were always disappointed in your siblings. They wanted you to follow the family steps to be lawyers, it's a family legacy. But neither of you did, and you had to face years of verbal abuse and mistreatment. Until your brother pulled you out of that hell-hole.

Yoongi cradled you in his arms as another pair wrapped around you. He rubbed comforting circles on your back.

"It's okay Y/n. You have all of us" you heard Jimin's calming voice say. You took a few shaky breaths, until they got steady.

"I'm so sorry to bother you guys" you said. You knew Yoongi's sleep was important to him and his health.

"Oh please. Just lie down." Yoongi said with a smile "And you, back to the room" he motioned towards Jimin, who pouted and went back.

That's how your life in Seoul started. Soon you got enrolled into SNU and moved to a different living space.

----------------------------------------------------

"You're not eating enough, again" Yuna, your roommate said.

"It's okay! I'm not that hungry" you said.

"It's okay. She's a grown up, She knows what she's doing" Nancy said.

"Thanks Nana" you said.

You just rushed out of the house and made your way to the book store when you passed by two girls gossiping when a name caught you attend "Park Jimin"

You heard them say "I don't think he could date Seulgi. She's not even that pretty" and the two laughed.

You felt a very well known tug at your heart and you sped up your pace to not listen to any of that. You entered the cafe/restaurant you work in and took on the apron.

"Hello Y/n did you eat? How has your day been so far" you boss asked

"It was good maam" you said bowing.

"Aigoo, how many times have I told you to call me eomoni. Don't be so formal. You are just like my daughter" she said. You started your daily chores and rode through the busiest timing of the day. As you were leaving you noticed a well known car by the back exit of the restaurant and ran to it. Seeing you Jimin rushed out of the car and pulled you in a hug, you found your brother beside him and hugged him tight as he patted you head.

"You're still not eating well are you?" Jimin questioned.

"It's nothing I'm just a bit stressed with studies" you said.

"How many times have I told you to stop working and concentrate on studies only" Yoongi chided.

"I told you Ms. Hong, needs me and I like working here" you said, and Jimin nodded.

The three of you grabbed dinner at a restaurant and caught up with the past activities. It was regular for you and your brother to meet and catch up once in a while, one of the maknaes, specially Jimin or Jungkook or even Hobi at times accompanied him, but that was rare.

Jimin was jumpy today and Yoongi noticed that. He always seemed to want to say something but he was hesitant. Until you asked "What have you been up to Jimin?"

"Just busy shaking rumours. Things get out of hand at times" he said. And just like that the dread you were feeling since the morning faded away. You three talked a bit more and then they dropped you at your apartment and left. You felt happy, it had actually been some time since you just saw Yoongi and you felt happy.

----------------------------------------------------

"You could have done that on the phone," Yoongi said to Jimin after they dropped his sister at her apartment.

"I have no idea what you are talking about" Jimin said not meeting his Hyung's gaze.

"It's futile to try to lie to me" Yoongi said.

"I needed to see her. OKAY! What do you want to know? You've already known that I was in love with her since I first saw here when we went to Daegu. That I was so glad when you brought her to us and wanted to drag her back when she decided to move out. That I keep trying to drop hints but she never picks any of them up!" Jimin ranted in frustration.

"Woah! Calm down Jimini, she's not used to this stuff" He said

"I know and I'm willing to wait as long as she needs," Jimin said

"You should start by making her feel better about herself" Yoongi said "Like you always do"

----------------------------------------------------

"Y/nie, where were you?" Nancy asked as you entered

"I was out with my brother and his friend" you said softly.

"Is it the same friend you have a crush on?" Yuna asked with a naughty smile.

You simply shook your head and went inside your room. "Why have you never confessed to him?" Nancy asked

"Because I am me? I'm too ordinary for him" you said

"Look, Y/n not everyone can be special, it doesn't mean you don't deserve love" Nancy said giving you a smile, and left your room. She was right, but it still hurt to think. What's the use of telling if you're gonna get rejected anyway.

"Don't listen to her" Yuna told you "She's just-"

"Very truthful?" You cut her and said

"Rude" Yuna said "You're too special, you're smart and sensible and funny and a really good painter. Jimin would be stupid to not like you"

Yes, Yuna knew, she was the only one who knew outside the company, that Yoongi is your brother. Nancy just knows a random name you came up with and stuck with as your brother. Yoongi had taken one look at her photo and told you to never tell her. You never knew why.

A few days later you received an invitation to go watch an award show and watch the new debut group. You thought it would be fun as the boys were around your age so you decided to go anyway. A company car picked you up and you joined the audience. You were once again amazed at the performance that BTS put up, growing up you've always heard Yoongi play but watching him rap and dance live always made you so proud. You blushed at the intense steps when Jimin was in the center. You also watched the 5 member group called Tomorrow by Together. You actually found all 5 of them so cute.

You were escorted to backstage to the BTS greenroom where all the members greeted you with warm hugs. Jimin's hug anyhow felt warmer and you lingered on a bit, but he didn't seem to mind.

Later the members of TxT members came to greet their sunbaes, You were about to leave but Yoongi held you to stay. They all greeted each other and Yoongi introduced you as his sister. They all waved at you as you blushed and waved back.

"She really looks like you Yoongi sunbae, so pretty" Beomgyu said.

Jimin looked at him with a smile, his smile got wider when he found you blushing and thanked Beomgyu mentally. No, he didn't feel jealous he loved it when people liked you and gived you attention and compliments. He almost feels proud of the way you carry yourself. And at that moment he felt that he should tell you, not ask you anything in return, but just let you know of his feeling.

----------------------------------------------------

You were really nervous when jimin called you oustide "to Talk". Jimin was more nervous though.

"Y/n I want to tell you something" Jimin said and he took a step towards you. He took your hand in his. You didn't really know what to say so you decided to remain silent.

"Y/nie, I really like you," he said, with a smile that engulfed his eyes. "I know it's sudden and I don't expect you to reciprocate or even say something. I just wanna let you know that I have feelings for you".

You were in shock you pulled your hand away from him.

"What do you mean you like me? Don't you know who and what I am?" you asked and Jimin was taken aback. It was okay if you didn't have feelings for him, but on earth was this supposed to mean?

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You can't have feelings for me. You simply can't come up to me and make me feel like you like me back. I am ME! I am a Nobody, I have nothing. YOU! You're too good for someone like me Jimin. Please get out of this misconception of yours" you said and ran away, as it was getting impossible to keep the tears at bay. NO, HE CAN"T LIKE YOU! THAT WILL RUIN HIS CAREER!! NO! YOU AND HIM CAN NEVER HAPPEN.

You rushed to the nearest bus stand and took a ride home, meanwhile BTS were totally shocked. "Wait, wait she said You simply can't come up to me and make me feel like you like me back." Hoseok repeated and Jimin went wide-eyed. That was when he realized that she liked him. Then what the hell was all that she said for?

"Don't worry. I will talk to her tomorrow" Yoongi said, saving the day.

So, here you were sitting in the genius lab waiting for your brother 4 days after the show, you will have lunch together. You didn't want to come but your brother threatened you with the same"If you don't come, I'll go to you" after you ignored him for straight 3 days, you didn't want that so you had to comply.

"Why did you do that?" Yoongi asked

"What? I did nothing" you said confused, you were just sitting.

"Why did you reject Jimin, when you clearly like him too?" Yoongi asked, keeping his headphones aside.

"It doesn't matter! Have all of you gone crazy?" You asked. "What will happen if dispatch finds out?!" you added.

"I will not let myself ruin him!" You said. Yoongi stood up and shook you by your shoulders. "Who told these things to you? If anything, Jimin would be lucky to have you!" you sighed.

"Do you really believe that?" you asked

"I know that!" Yoongi said "Do you know Jimin didn't have a blink of sleep he has been working and dancing day and night for the last days! Eat and then go see him"

You thought back to what Yuna said that day, to trust the process and take chances. Well, she was asking you to confess but now you know how Jimin feels. Should you may be, take a chance? What if-

Your thoughts were interupted by Yoongi who said "Stop overthinking the situation. Just go see him"

After lunch and some more encouraging words you finally set off towards the dance studios when you heard his new unreleased song being played in one of the room. You entered listening to the lyrics:

"The cosmos moved for us

was nothing slightly out of place

Our happiness was expected

Cuz you love me And I love you"

And his eyes met you, you could swear you felt like time had stopped and Jimin stood still in the position of the step he was doing last. You waved and Jimin almost lost balance as he sped up to come to stand infront of you, you thought he would hug you. He thought that too though, but he controlled himself. He didn't know if he should and you could see the hesitation in his eyes. You didn't know how to feel. You felt bad and hence you closed the gap and hugged him tightly. His arms instantly wrapped around your waist as he pulled you closer.

"I'm so sorry. I was scared" you say

"Don't worry, we'll take it slow" he said, as he pulled your hand to sit at a corner. You told him your concerns and he told you what he sees in you. How he feels he doesn't deserve you and how he'd be glad if you'd date him. Even you were surprised when you nodded your head yes, he almost squashed you in a hug. It was around 6 when you finally left, and you had to complete a few assignments.

When you left that day, you felt a bit better, actually a hell lot better, when you waved a hand from the cab to your boyfriend standing on the curb. You felt so good that you didn't notice two eyes looking at you from far with shock and disdain. You wanted to reach home quick to tell Yuna but then you remembered how she said she had a deadline today and would be home late. Well, you'll tell her tomorrow morning.

You entered your house to find it dark and quiet, you took two steps towards the switchboard when you felt a hard strike on the back of your head and everything went dark.

You felt a slap on your cheek and hissed, your vision was hazy, you tried to move but you could not, you were tied to a chair. You could finally see and the face you saw scared you.

"Finally, you're awake, took you one and a half hours? I almost thought you were dead" You heard, the words, they sounded venoumous.

"NANCY! WHAT THE FUCK?!" you asked "LET ME GO!"

"You WHORE!" *SLAP* "YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD LIE TO ME!" *SLAP* "yOU THOUGHT YOU COULD HIDE HIM FROM ME!" *SLAP*

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN!" you screamed "AND LET ME GO! UNTIE ME!"

"Oh I know how you meet up with MY JIMINIE OPPA! HE"S YOUR BROTHER! AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME!" *SLAP*

"You're making a mistake Nancy. You got it all wrong! Let me go! Let me go!" You tried to move and get yourself free but it was useless. If you move more then the ropes might bruise you instead so you stayed still.

"Poor Y/nie, did you think that just because you have a hot popular brother that you're better than the rest of us? THAN ME!" she said. "Gimme his number, TELL ME YOUR PASSWORD!" she suddenly said.

"What no! Nancy stay away! LEMME GO!" you said, almost close to tears, the ropes are hurting your wrist. She was about to smack you when suddenly she fell on the ground. You found Yuna behind her, with a vase in her hand.

"Y/n!!" a worried Jimin rushed to you, with Suga on the other side.

"Are you okay?!" Your brother asked. As soon as your wrists were free Jimin was about to engulf you in a hug but Yoongi bet him to it.

"You worried us so bad" He said, Jimin inspected your cheeks that was red and swollen a bit.

"The police are here" Yuna said

"You guys! HOW?!" you asked.

"Remember I told you to text me once you reach home? well, when you didn't I got a bit worried because the sasaeng problems have increased recently, they even followed and attacked a staff last day and weren't caught. So, Yoongi hyung contacted Yoona, who was already on her way back and we heard the conversation and understood the situation. It was Yoongi hyung's idea to use the fire exit as if we used the door that maniac would have gotten a heads up" he said now hugging you.

Soon the police came and restrained her movement, she cursed and shouted all the way as Yoongi and Jimin were hiding in your room.

As soon as they went, Jimin rushed outside to hold you in a tight hug again, you looked up at him and he was staring into your eyes, Yoongi and Yuna decided to leave the room as your faces drew closer.

Yoongi knew you were in safe hands.

----------------------------------------------------

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Taglist: @cherryblossom-2004 @jung-nika-hoseok @bbl32

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Idol! Jimin x Reader: Scars (Yoongi's sister au)

Summary: Growing up in a strict household is difficult. Especially when your elder brother is in a place doing something your parents strongly disapprove. Their eyes are always on you. Your brother saves you from them, but you caught the eye of a certain fluffy cheeked member.

A/n: This idea has been sitting in my head for a long time so I finally decided to write it down. There are discussions about mental health, abuse, self harm, so if any of that makes you uncomfortable read at your own discretion.

Also THIS

----------------------------------------------------

"Why can't you be better? You're a worse disappointment than your brother"

"You're worthless"

"Why couldn't you have been born smarter?"

Once again your cries were heard to be echoed in the flat. The pin to your door being put in a hurry, not that you could hear it beyond your own sobs. A warm embrace held you, as you sobbed.

"It's okay. It's okay, they can't get you" Your brother said.

It's been the same for the past week, since he brought you away from your parents. You have been living with your parents for the past 16 years, they were always disappointed in your siblings. They wanted you to follow the family steps to be lawyers, it's a family legacy. But neither of you did, and you had to face years of verbal abuse and mistreatment. Until your brother pulled you out of that hell-hole.

Yoongi cradled you in his arms as another pair wrapped around you. He rubbed comforting circles on your back.

"It's okay Y/n. You have all of us" you heard Jimin's calming voice say. You took a few shaky breaths, until they got steady.

"I'm so sorry to bother you guys" you said. You knew Yoongi's sleep was important to him and his health.

"Oh please. Just lie down." Yoongi said with a smile "And you, back to the room" he motioned towards Jimin, who pouted and went back.

That's how your life in Seoul started. Soon you got enrolled into SNU and moved to a different living space.

----------------------------------------------------

"You're not eating enough, again" Yuna, your roommate said.

"It's okay! I'm not that hungry" you said.

"It's okay. She's a grown up, She knows what she's doing" Nancy said.

"Thanks Nana" you said.

You just rushed out of the house and made your way to the book store when you passed by two girls gossiping when a name caught you attend "Park Jimin"

You heard them say "I don't think he could date Seulgi. She's not even that pretty" and the two laughed.

You felt a very well known tug at your heart and you sped up your pace to not listen to any of that. You entered the cafe/restaurant you work in and took on the apron.

"Hello Y/n did you eat? How has your day been so far" you boss asked

"It was good maam" you said bowing.

"Aigoo, how many times have I told you to call me eomoni. Don't be so formal. You are just like my daughter" she said. You started your daily chores and rode through the busiest timing of the day. As you were leaving you noticed a well known car by the back exit of the restaurant and ran to it. Seeing you Jimin rushed out of the car and pulled you in a hug, you found your brother beside him and hugged him tight as he patted you head.

"You're still not eating well are you?" Jimin questioned.

"It's nothing I'm just a bit stressed with studies" you said.

"How many times have I told you to stop working and concentrate on studies only" Yoongi chided.

"I told you Ms. Hong, needs me and I like working here" you said, and Jimin nodded.

The three of you grabbed dinner at a restaurant and caught up with the past activities. It was regular for you and your brother to meet and catch up once in a while, one of the maknaes, specially Jimin or Jungkook or even Hobi at times accompanied him, but that was rare.

Jimin was jumpy today and Yoongi noticed that. He always seemed to want to say something but he was hesitant. Until you asked "What have you been up to Jimin?"

"Just busy shaking rumours. Things get out of hand at times" he said. And just like that the dread you were feeling since the morning faded away. You three talked a bit more and then they dropped you at your apartment and left. You felt happy, it had actually been some time since you just saw Yoongi and you felt happy.

----------------------------------------------------

"You could have done that on the phone," Yoongi said to Jimin after they dropped his sister at her apartment.

"I have no idea what you are talking about" Jimin said not meeting his Hyung's gaze.

"It's futile to try to lie to me" Yoongi said.

"I needed to see her. OKAY! What do you want to know? You've already known that I was in love with her since I first saw here when we went to Daegu. That I was so glad when you brought her to us and wanted to drag her back when she decided to move out. That I keep trying to drop hints but she never picks any of them up!" Jimin ranted in frustration.

"Woah! Calm down Jimini, she's not used to this stuff" He said

"I know and I'm willing to wait as long as she needs," Jimin said

"You should start by making her feel better about herself" Yoongi said "Like you always do"

----------------------------------------------------

"Y/nie, where were you?" Nancy asked as you entered

"I was out with my brother and his friend" you said softly.

"Is it the same friend you have a crush on?" Yuna asked with a naughty smile.

You simply shook your head and went inside your room. "Why have you never confessed to him?" Nancy asked

"Because I am me? I'm too ordinary for him" you said

"Look, Y/n not everyone can be special, it doesn't mean you don't deserve love" Nancy said giving you a smile, and left your room. She was right, but it still hurt to think. What's the use of telling if you're gonna get rejected anyway.

"Don't listen to her" Yuna told you "She's just-"

"Very truthful?" You cut her and said

"Rude" Yuna said "You're too special, you're smart and sensible and funny and a really good painter. Jimin would be stupid to not like you"

Yes, Yuna knew, she was the only one who knew outside the company, that Yoongi is your brother. Nancy just knows a random name you came up with and stuck with as your brother. Yoongi had taken one look at her photo and told you to never tell her. You never knew why.

A few days later you received an invitation to go watch an award show and watch the new debut group. You thought it would be fun as the boys were around your age so you decided to go anyway. A company car picked you up and you joined the audience. You were once again amazed at the performance that BTS put up, growing up you've always heard Yoongi play but watching him rap and dance live always made you so proud. You blushed at the intense steps when Jimin was in the center. You also watched the 5 member group called Tomorrow by Together. You actually found all 5 of them so cute.

You were escorted to backstage to the BTS greenroom where all the members greeted you with warm hugs. Jimin's hug anyhow felt warmer and you lingered on a bit, but he didn't seem to mind.

Later the members of TxT members came to greet their sunbaes, You were about to leave but Yoongi held you to stay. They all greeted each other and Yoongi introduced you as his sister. They all waved at you as you blushed and waved back.

"She really looks like you Yoongi sunbae, so pretty" Beomgyu said.

Jimin looked at him with a smile, his smile got wider when he found you blushing and thanked Beomgyu mentally. No, he didn't feel jealous he loved it when people liked you and gived you attention and compliments. He almost feels proud of the way you carry yourself. And at that moment he felt that he should tell you, not ask you anything in return, but just let you know of his feeling.

----------------------------------------------------

You were really nervous when jimin called you oustide "to Talk". Jimin was more nervous though.

"Y/n I want to tell you something" Jimin said and he took a step towards you. He took your hand in his. You didn't really know what to say so you decided to remain silent.

"Y/nie, I really like you," he said, with a smile that engulfed his eyes. "I know it's sudden and I don't expect you to reciprocate or even say something. I just wanna let you know that I have feelings for you".

You were in shock you pulled your hand away from him.

"What do you mean you like me? Don't you know who and what I am?" you asked and Jimin was taken aback. It was okay if you didn't have feelings for him, but on earth was this supposed to mean?

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You can't have feelings for me. You simply can't come up to me and make me feel like you like me back. I am ME! I am a Nobody, I have nothing. YOU! You're too good for someone like me Jimin. Please get out of this misconception of yours" you said and ran away, as it was getting impossible to keep the tears at bay. NO, HE CAN"T LIKE YOU! THAT WILL RUIN HIS CAREER!! NO! YOU AND HIM CAN NEVER HAPPEN.

You rushed to the nearest bus stand and took a ride home, meanwhile BTS were totally shocked. "Wait, wait she said You simply can't come up to me and make me feel like you like me back." Hoseok repeated and Jimin went wide-eyed. That was when he realized that she liked him. Then what the hell was all that she said for?

"Don't worry. I will talk to her tomorrow" Yoongi said, saving the day.

So, here you were sitting in the genius lab waiting for your brother 4 days after the show, you will have lunch together. You didn't want to come but your brother threatened you with the same"If you don't come, I'll go to you" after you ignored him for straight 3 days, you didn't want that so you had to comply.

"Why did you do that?" Yoongi asked

"What? I did nothing" you said confused, you were just sitting.

"Why did you reject Jimin, when you clearly like him too?" Yoongi asked, keeping his headphones aside.

"It doesn't matter! Have all of you gone crazy?" You asked. "What will happen if dispatch finds out?!" you added.

"I will not let myself ruin him!" You said. Yoongi stood up and shook you by your shoulders. "Who told these things to you? If anything, Jimin would be lucky to have you!" you sighed.

"Do you really believe that?" you asked

"I know that!" Yoongi said "Do you know Jimin didn't have a blink of sleep he has been working and dancing day and night for the last days! Eat and then go see him"

You thought back to what Yuna said that day, to trust the process and take chances. Well, she was asking you to confess but now you know how Jimin feels. Should you may be, take a chance? What if-

Your thoughts were interupted by Yoongi who said "Stop overthinking the situation. Just go see him"

After lunch and some more encouraging words you finally set off towards the dance studios when you heard his new unreleased song being played in one of the room. You entered listening to the lyrics:

"The cosmos moved for us

was nothing slightly out of place

Our happiness was expected

Cuz you love me And I love you"

And his eyes met you, you could swear you felt like time had stopped and Jimin stood still in the position of the step he was doing last. You waved and Jimin almost lost balance as he sped up to come to stand infront of you, you thought he would hug you. He thought that too though, but he controlled himself. He didn't know if he should and you could see the hesitation in his eyes. You didn't know how to feel. You felt bad and hence you closed the gap and hugged him tightly. His arms instantly wrapped around your waist as he pulled you closer.

"I'm so sorry. I was scared" you say

"Don't worry, we'll take it slow" he said, as he pulled your hand to sit at a corner. You told him your concerns and he told you what he sees in you. How he feels he doesn't deserve you and how he'd be glad if you'd date him. Even you were surprised when you nodded your head yes, he almost squashed you in a hug. It was around 6 when you finally left, and you had to complete a few assignments.

When you left that day, you felt a bit better, actually a hell lot better, when you waved a hand from the cab to your boyfriend standing on the curb. You felt so good that you didn't notice two eyes looking at you from far with shock and disdain. You wanted to reach home quick to tell Yuna but then you remembered how she said she had a deadline today and would be home late. Well, you'll tell her tomorrow morning.

You entered your house to find it dark and quiet, you took two steps towards the switchboard when you felt a hard strike on the back of your head and everything went dark.

You felt a slap on your cheek and hissed, your vision was hazy, you tried to move but you could not, you were tied to a chair. You could finally see and the face you saw scared you.

"Finally, you're awake, took you one and a half hours? I almost thought you were dead" You heard, the words, they sounded venoumous.

"NANCY! WHAT THE FUCK?!" you asked "LET ME GO!"

"You WHORE!" *SLAP* "YOU THOUGHT YOU COULD LIE TO ME!" *SLAP* "yOU THOUGHT YOU COULD HIDE HIM FROM ME!" *SLAP*

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN!" you screamed "AND LET ME GO! UNTIE ME!"

"Oh I know how you meet up with MY JIMINIE OPPA! HE"S YOUR BROTHER! AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME!" *SLAP*

"You're making a mistake Nancy. You got it all wrong! Let me go! Let me go!" You tried to move and get yourself free but it was useless. If you move more then the ropes might bruise you instead so you stayed still.

"Poor Y/nie, did you think that just because you have a hot popular brother that you're better than the rest of us? THAN ME!" she said. "Gimme his number, TELL ME YOUR PASSWORD!" she suddenly said.

"What no! Nancy stay away! LEMME GO!" you said, almost close to tears, the ropes are hurting your wrist. She was about to smack you when suddenly she fell on the ground. You found Yuna behind her, with a vase in her hand.

"Y/n!!" a worried Jimin rushed to you, with Suga on the other side.

"Are you okay?!" Your brother asked. As soon as your wrists were free Jimin was about to engulf you in a hug but Yoongi bet him to it.

"You worried us so bad" He said, Jimin inspected your cheeks that was red and swollen a bit.

"The police are here" Yuna said

"You guys! HOW?!" you asked.

"Remember I told you to text me once you reach home? well, when you didn't I got a bit worried because the sasaeng problems have increased recently, they even followed and attacked a staff last day and weren't caught. So, Yoongi hyung contacted Yoona, who was already on her way back and we heard the conversation and understood the situation. It was Yoongi hyung's idea to use the fire exit as if we used the door that maniac would have gotten a heads up" he said now hugging you.

Soon the police came and restrained her movement, she cursed and shouted all the way as Yoongi and Jimin were hiding in your room.

As soon as they went, Jimin rushed outside to hold you in a tight hug again, you looked up at him and he was staring into your eyes, Yoongi and Yuna decided to leave the room as your faces drew closer.

Yoongi knew you were in safe hands.

----------------------------------------------------

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Taglist: @cherryblossom-2004 @jung-nika-hoseok @bbl32

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The Consequences of Fucking Up

“Your break up was messy and painful. All you want to do is to forget about him. His friends, who ever since you ended it with Yoongi see you as their bullying target, make sure that the memory of him stays fresh in your mind however, haunting you day by fucking day. While Yoongi makes it seem as if he gives no fuck about your situation. Until one night he is in front of your door. Drunk and fucking regretful.”

♥️ Requested by anonie ♥️

Pairing: Gangster!Yoongi x f.Reader

Genre: Exes!AU, Messy Break-Up!AU, Crime!AU, Cop!AU, Hurt and Comfort, Angst, Smut, a lil bit of Fluff

Wordcount: 15.9k

Warnings: lowkey they're bad for each other, but also somehow so right?, OC is such a people hater, I feel like she has mental health issues which are never addressed tbfh, she is quite the pessimist, unhealthy consumption of alcohol, smoking of cigarettes & weed (listen. i hate smoking and stand by that but it sadly fits their characters), Yoongi is kinda apathetic and cold, or is he??, IS HE???, implied violence and murder, corrupt cops & lawyers, policeman!Jungkook makes an appearance and he stole my heart tbfh :(, he is so cute that i almost sobbed, drugdealer!Hoseok makes an appearance too, there is also detective!Namjoon and smuggler!Taehyung because I love this vibe :); abuse of power, fuck Yoongi just fuck he is so ngngn, slightly protective & possessive!Yoongi, intoxicated sex, desperate!Yoongi, no foreplay, but she is not uncomfortable, choking (m.receiving), rough desperate sex, position change from sex against a sofa to missionary on said sofa, a lil bit of strength kink hihi, he cums too soon, dirty talk, tears :'), he is actually so emotional during the sex, the ending is so cheesy and cute <3, Spoiler: he is willing to change!! and he is a cutie actually, jsjsjsj sorry but i love yoongi a lot :(

Disclaimer: This is purely fiction and isn't like my usual stories. It does not portray how the boys actually are and it is not how I see them. This is a work of fiction with no correlation to real life. The type of relationships depicted in this story are far from how I normally portray my relationships and I do not advertise for such relationhips or staying in such relationships. This story is supposed to be twisted and dark & so are the relationships in it, as well as the characters. You have been warned. If you decide to continue reading, then it is out of your own free will.

a/n: now that the disclaimer is out of the way i can officially bark because woof woof fuckkcc anonie thank you so much for this idea. i had the worst and best time writing this story like nfnfnf her mental state was definitely very difficult to write, but their tension just got to me. i made the ending as cute and fluffy as possible just as you wanted hihi <3 also i love villian characters who would set the whole world on fire just to prove their dedication :) i hope this is what you imagined, because i kinda made it longer and with more plot than i planned to at first sjjsjs i couldn't be stopped jsjsj ALSO this is giving me the perfect opportunity to finally write a Kook request I got years ago ohoho

Yoongi collides with the wall, feeling the cold nuzzle of the gun press against his chin. He drops the keys and flowers he was carrying, lifting his hands in defeat.

“Careful, it’s just me”, he lulls.

“Get the fuck out of my house”, you spit, carrying murder in your eyes. 

Three months prior

“So you’re breaking up with me?” he asks, gawking at you with widened eyes. He looks more surprised than he does hurt. Probably because it hasn’t actually sunk in yet.

“I am.”

“No, you’re not.” He laughs because he never takes anything seriously.

“Yes. I am.”

“Too bad, I won’t act like it.”

“Yeah, you will.”

He laughs, “you’ve had better jokes, but I still admire the commitment.”

“You see. That’s the problem with you. Everything’s a fucking joke to you.”

He is smiling. It reaches his eyes.

“Your job, your men. Me. Everything’s a fucking joke to you. If you would have taken Sukuna’s thread seriously, Soojin would still be alive. If you didn’t fucking insult Miss Mei, you wouldn’t have lost twenty thousand in drugs and you wouldn’t have to fucking kiss asses like a beggar.”

His smile doesn’t reach his eyes anymore.

“If you would have put any kind of effort into me, I wouldn’t be leaving now. You take everything as a joke, while in reality you are the biggest joke here.”

His smile falls. You stood up and that actually scared him. 

“Wait baby, wait. Princess, we can talk about this”, he argues, closing the distance with his arms stretched open. “I’ll fix the issue with Miss Mei, I promise.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’m done talking. Soojin died because of your recklessness.” 

Yoongi touches your hands. He holds them, clutches them. You have never felt such a touch from him before. As if he actually loved you. 

“What can I do? Tell me and I’ll do it”, he offers, caressing your knuckles. 

This is what you craved for months. Affection. Attention. You were always a passing thought to him. Something to fuck and possess. Something low maintenance like all his other shit. His current touch almost makes you want to stay because for the briefest moment, your breaking heart wants to believe that he finally changed. 

But you know better. He doesn’t take you seriously and if you stay, you will one day end up like Soojin. Metaphorically or not, you will end up dead because of him. 

“There is nothing you can do. Sorry.”

You slip out of his touch.

“Baby”, Yoongi follows you with panicked eyes, trying to touch you again.

“Goodbye, Min Yoongi.”

“Please don’t leave me.”

You close the door and run, finally letting the tears escape. 

You love him.

You always have and perhaps always will. 

You don’t want to leave, but know that staying will kill you. 

One week passes. You spent it holed up in your small, shitty apartment, crying your heart out. Yoongi was the best and worst thing that ever happened to you and you miss him. You hate that you miss him. Because he was way worse than he was good. 

He was never abusive. He was a violent man to anyone but you. You, he always touched with utmost care. At you, he never screamed. But he was still not good. He was cold and apathetic at times, then terribly affectionate at others, only to become cold again. And you couldn’t take it anymore. 

You wouldn’t have left your apartment today if your fridge hadn’t been empty. It wasn’t always empty, but sadly enough, groceries don’t magically appear. Not even for an outlaw such as yourself.

The city is busy. The smell of street food, smog and body odor poisons the air. The weather is hot these days and people started sweating more. You can’t stand people. You pull the mask tighter around your nose, hoping to shield the stench this way. 

You greet the clerk when you enter the shop, lowering your mask. It smells of grocery store in here. Fresh bread, produce and clean floors. It’s a welcome change to the rancid outside.

You spent fourty minutes in the shop and pay with cash. You never pay with card because it can be traced. Someone like you can’t risk being found. 

“See you”, you say your goodbyes and leave the store. You plan on coming back in three weeks. You can’t stand being outside often.

The door just about closed behind you and then someone jumps you. Three people to be more exact. Two hold your arms while one rips the bags out of your hands. 

“Let go! Hey, you fuckers!” you fight them off instantly, surprised at how easily it is to do. Way too easy. They let go of you as quickly as they grabbed you. At first you think that nothing happened, until you notice your grocery bags in one of the guys’ hands. They stole your stuff!

“You motherfuckers! Get back here! They’re mine!” 

They run away, flipping you off over their shoulders.

You sprint after them, but before you reach them, they jump onto a tuk tuk and drive off, finally showing you their faces. Those were some of Yoongi’s underlings.

“What the fuck?” You stumble back in disbelief. “Did they fucking steal my food? What the fuck’s happening?” 

It takes you a while before you finally come to the conclusion that you have to buy everything they stole a second time. And you do. And nobody jumps you. And you go home, make yourself shitty dinner and drink a bottle of soju all by yourself. It isn’t a good night. It’s a shit night. But then. All your nights have been shit for years.

You met Yoongi four years ago. It correlates with when your shit nights began. Okay, you are being unfair. The first two years with him were paradise and your nights were wonderful. You were an aspiring lawyer, while he was in the midst of getting a promotion to superintendent.  You supported each other’s dreams, motivated each other and celebrated when your goals were achieved. Then the truth spilled out. The man you knew to love turned out to be a lie. Why you never left, you do not know. He gave you the chance to leave, but you didn’t. You made yourself low maintenance to him and your nights became shit. He pretended to be a proper policeman by day while you pretended to be a proper lawyer and at night he became what he hunted by day while you tried to hide whatever evidence about him flooded into the offices. You hated it at first, then loved it, then lost your job because of it and became dependent on him and started to hate it again. Well, at least working for him. You liked everything else. Having to work in the system and seeing how corrupt even the most eligible politicians or CEOs truly are, made you realise that perhaps stealing from them isn’t as bad as it first sounded. You liked being on the dark side of the law because the bright side was just as twisted. You just simply started to hate that it means being close to Yoongi.

It took Soojin’s death to finally make you realise that staying with him will end in your death as well. And so you finally left.

You will start a new life, make up a new identity, move to a different country and forget about him. Maybe. Who knows. You haven’t decided yet.

A letter comes five days after the grocery store incident. It is stuffed into an unsealed envelope and clearly delivered by the person who wrote it. You open it, feeling shit instantly. Whoever wrote this letter is calling you the most hurtful of names, telling you personal stuff which truly hurts. You throw it away and go back inside, opening a bottle of soju. It wasn’t Yoongi’s handwriting, but somehow you still think that it is connected to him. You try not to let it get to you, but you still end up rotting away in your bed for the rest of the week only leaving it to piss, shit and eat. 

The next week your packages are missing. You never get them back. The culprit is never found. You curse the sky, knowing that it was fruitless. Yet again, you think that it was connected to him. To Yoongi, the man you wanted to forget, but who keeps haunting you day by day.

The city at night is a dangerous place. If you don’t know where to walk, you could find yourself in a rather messy situation. Especially as a woman. You are glad that most women are clever enough to stay at home once darkness greets the streets. Most women don’t know how to defend themselves though. Properly and without the law in mind. You killed before. Once. It was self defence. Yoongi took care of the body, you never found out what happened to it. He stayed with you the night it happened, even let you cry in his arms. He was gone the next day and never spoke of it again.

You clutch the big knife tightly in your bag, scanning the streets constantly. It isn’t far anymore until you are home. Hopefully the heavy rain clouds stay dry until you get there. You aren’t in the mood to get wet. Not tonight. You would have never left if you hadn’t ran out of fucking cigarettes. The kiosk was closed, so the journey was useless. Thunder announces that the clouds aren’t your friends. Mere seconds later, it starts pouring.

“Fucking shit, I hate this city.”

Rain in this city is always dirty and never really cold. You take it as a bad sign. Rain shouldn’t be warm. Not always, not constantly. Something’s wrong with this city. Something is rotting slowly until one day it will consume everything in its wake. You hope to have left before it can wake up.

The way home is too long for the amount of dirty rain it pours. You find refuge under a shop sign. There are no rooftops or canopies in sight and the only thing close to a safe place was the stupid restaurant sign. Authentic Asian Beef Noodles, it reads in bright red letters. The place is stuffed with people and the smell of beef broth mixes with the dirty scent of rain. You grind your teeth. What a shitty situation you find yourself in. You prefer being outside though. You know that once inside, the restaurant would be hot and stink of digested booze and body odor. You take getting wet over breathing in people’s air.

Except that you don’t really stay wet for long. The distinct sound of rain hitting an umbrella meets your ears. You look up. Black. You look to the side at the person holding it. Yoongi. Your stomach twists, your heart skips a beat. He is wearing a suit tonight. Black with a black tie. His hair is slicked back. He used makeup to  conceal the scar running all the way from his forehead over his eye and down half his cheek. This is his work outfit. His police chief outfit. Yes. He is a chief these days.

Your instincts tell you to leave without saying anything, but it’s been six weeks since the breakup and you still love him. You hate that you do, but can’t stop staring at his face. He has his brows raised in a nonchalant way as he inspects the heavy rain. He doesn’t grant you eye contact, but holds the umbrella in a way which lets you know that he came out here after seeing you. His left shoulder is getting wet, while you stay dry completely.

“What are you doing here?” you hear yourself ask him.

“Work dinner. I have to pay ‘cause I’m the boss and all that shit. They’re eating like greedy pigs”, he scoffs, “fucking assholes.”

“I see.”

“You?” 

“Buying smokes.”

He finally looks at you, studying from head to toe.

“The kiosk was closed”, you answer his question about your cigarettes’ whereabouts before he can ask it.

“I thought you quit.”

“Some things happened which made me start again.”

“Mhm”, he hums and takes out a packet of cigarettes from the inside of his suit jacket. He lights himself one and puts the packet away again, leaving you to stare at the smoke he blows out through his nose.

He isn’t actually serious, is he? It is like he is mocking you. It is already bad enough that he sends his stupid goons to terrorise you, now he is mocking you as well? You hate that you still love him.

You stay like this for a while. You staring at him while he holds the umbrella for you and smokes. You don’t know why you stay. You hate that you love him. You hate it so much.

Yoongi takes a long drag of the cigarette and exhales the smoke in an almost sigh-like breath. He lifts the cigarette, holding it closer to you.

“What?” you sound disbelieved, scandalised even.

He doesn’t say anything. He just shows you the cigarette as his eyes follow the endless rain. You hate that you love him. You hate it so much. But you still take the cigarette and put your lips right where he had his’ moments before. But you still smoke it as if it was the most normal thing to do. Because it once was. You and he shared many smokes in the past. It was once the most sensual, erotic thing to do between you and him. Barely clothed, intoxicated minds and high on the other, you often shared a joint as you got each other off. Fuck, it was always so fucking orgasmic to be with him that way.

“Wanna grab a bite?” he offers, pointing at the restaurant behind him, “one more mouth to feed isn’t gonna ruin me.”

You are hungry. You haven’t had a proper meal in weeks. Instant ramen, frozen food and snacks is all your body has to run on. You have no energy to cook and with how shitty you eat, it is a vicious cycle. Shitty food gives little energy, you already have low energy. The motivation to properly cook grows lower and lower each day. You dread the day you have only enough energy left to open a package of chips and eat it for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

“I’m not hungry.”

He glances at you. He knows that you are lying. Your eyes have greyed in starvation. He almost rips the cigarette out of your fingers and smokes it angrily, huffing out the smoke. 

“I’m offering”, he hisses.

“And I’m declining. I can take care of myself”, you throw back and rip the cigarette from his grasp to smoke it angrily. 

You may be starving, but you will be damned if you make yourself dependent on him again. You left him to finally prove to yourself that you can take care of yourself. You don’t need his help. Not anymore. 

You take another deep drag, then hand the cigarette to him. He smokes it, glaring at you. You know that your stubbornness angers him.

“Tell your men to stop pestering me”, you say into the tense silence. 

He looks over his shoulder at his police team. They are too drunk and caught in conversation to pay their boss any mind.

“They’re inside”, he says.

“You know I don’t mean them. Tell your other men to stop annoying me.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Yes. You do.” It is your turn to smoke. “It all started when they stole my groceries, but it’s been getting childish. My packages keep getting stolen, my internet cuts off, I find letters in my mail. Letters saying awful things about me. It’s getting ridiculous. Tell your men to stop terrorising me.”

“Stolen packages?” He takes the cigarette from you, brushing his fingers against yours as he does. The touch feels like the sweetest poison on your skin. “This doesn’t sound like my problem to solve. Go to the police.”

“Are you serious?” 

He inhales, exhales the smoke into your face. You should be disgusted by it, but almost huff it in like an addict. Yoongi watches your lids lower and your chest raise in a greedy breath, finding it hard not to stare at your lips as he hands you the cigarette. You smoke it. His eyes are still on your lips, glued to the shape of them as his throat runs dry.

“Very serious”, he rasps.

“You are the police”, you throw back in disbelief, exhaling the smoke into his face that way.

“Mhm yeah, I guess I am.” He takes the cigarette, smoking it with half lidded eyes. He exhales, handing you the cigarette. “When are you going to come home again?” he asks, looking back at the rain.

You almost choke on the smoke, exhaling it in a cough. Yoongi glances at you from the corner of his eyes.

“Your farce is getting ridiculous”, he says coldly.

“My farce?”

This break up wasn’t the first break up you and he went through. You left many times before, always thinking that you were finally strong enough to forget him only to come crawling back again. You don’t blame him for doubting that this time will be different, but you still can’t stop yourself from getting angry.

“Did you even hear what I said?”

“I did. Go to the police. I have nothing to do with it.”

You drop the half-finished cigarette. It dies in the puddle on the ground.

“I was smoking this”, he says dryly, “besides, don’t litter.”

“Pick it up yourself if you care so much about these dirty ass streets”, you spit and turn to leave. You take getting wet over being with him any longer.

Yoongi watches you leave, shakes his head in disbelief and bends down to pick up the cigarette. He won’t run after you because you will come crawling back eventually. You always do.

“Sir?” 

He turns his head. One of his officers. He is young and with sparkles of big dreams in his eyes. Yoongi pities him. This city is going to chew him up until there is nothing left of him. He had the same dreams once and knows what the viper nest, which is the justice system, is going to do to him. 

“What do you want?” he asks him dryly, rolling the wet cigarette between his fingers.

“Who did you talk to right now?”

“Just someone important to me.”

“Shouldn’t we escort her home? It’s raining and there could be criminals on the streets. It’s too dangerous for a woman to be alone.”

“She’ll get home safely.”

“Are you sure, Sir? I stayed sober for cases like these. I could get the car right away.”

“You’re sober?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“But it’s a work dinner. You’ve been off work for hours.”

The young officer salutes, “I know, Sir but a policeman shouldn’t slack, Sir.”

Yoongi feels deep pity for the young man. He is so motivated, so proper and full of good spirit. Waking up is going to hurt like a bitch for him.

He pats him on the shoulder.

“You’re a good person, Jeon”, he says and swerves past him to get back inside. 

The young officer follows him with pride glimmering in his innocent eyes. Yes, waking up is going to hurt like a bitch for him. 

Yoongi wasn’t always living two lives. He was like his young officer once. Full of dreams and motivation. He dreamed of using his powers to do good, to help those who needed it most and then he woke up. He watched politicians and men in power ruin, rape and kill the powerless without ever getting punished for it. He felt helpless. If even someone in his position can’t change the world, then who will? His criminal work was honourable once. He slipped evidence money under the table to hand out to the powerless, he let proof disappear for people doing crimes out of desperation. One time he was supposed to put a starving mother behind bars because she stole diapers for her babies. Yoongi couldn’t do it and so he disobeyed the law for these kinds of people.

But then his criminal work became less about the powerless and more about him. Making money the illegal way was easy and it is fucking addicting. Especially when he could make sure that evidence about him never reached the higher ups. Yoongi fucking loved the sudden power he possessed and he was too blinded by it to see that he became exactly what drove him to criminality in the first place.

Yoongi tells his officer to check up on your place that night. The young officer rings the doorbell like he was told to do.

You open it, swaying from intoxication as you do. The stench of digested booze wafts off you. But you somehow seem to sober up when you see the police badges on his shirt.

“You’ve got the wrong person”, you tell him, trying to morph your face into an expression of sobriety.

“Don’t worry, Miss. I came here to check on you.”

“Check on me?”

“Yes, Miss.” He salutes you. “I have orders from my captain to make sure that you arrived home safely and that you received this”, he says with an innocent smile on his lips, presenting a plastic bag to you. 

Authentic Asian Beef Noodles, it reads in red letters and inside, three big takeout containers of food are waiting to be eaten. 

Everything clicks into place. This is one of Yoongi’s employees. Another young, hopeful spirit which will be crushed in the system. You pity the young officer. You had the same innocent sparkle in your eyes once.

Hesitantly, you accept the takeout food.

“Thanks”, you mumble.

“Any time, Miss.” He studies you for a moment. “Are you…are you okay, Miss?”

You bite back tears. His empathy is going to kill him one day. But it feels so good to receive. You haven’t been asked this question in so long.

You shake your head. He straightens up in worry. 

“Should I call help for you, Miss?”

You know what he indicates.

“Thank you, no. I’m just going through some shit. Sorry, I’m being sappy tonight.”

“You don’t have to go through it alone, Miss.”

“I know. I’m just… I’m seriously alright, I won’t do anything stupid. You don’t have to worry, officer.” 

“Yes, well I still see it as my duty to stay because you seem sad to me”, he says and tries to go inside your apartment. He still has a lot to learn. You know from his eyes that he has no bad intentions and that he truly wants to help, but you know how the city will treat such deeds. One day he will try to help the wrong person and end up with attempted sexual assault charges. And it will fucking destroy him because people like him only see the good in the world and can’t imagine that others would want to hurt people.

You stop him with a guiding hand on his chest.

“That isn’t necessary, really. My packages keep getting stolen and I guess it’s been annoying me.”

He pulls out a pen paper instantly, stepping closer to you without noticing, “your packages? Have you seen anyone suspicious? How many packages have gone missing? When did it start?”

“No, I… Thank you for your concern and the food, but I will get through the night safely.”

He steps back, cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

“Forgive me, I don’t know why I did that. My captain said that you were important to him and that I should make sure that you are well, so I wanted to do a good job at it.” He bows at you deeply. “Please forgive me, Miss.” 

“He said that?” you whisper.

He nods his head, “yes, Miss.”

“Oh. Uhm. ” You clear your throat. “Thank you, I, uhm, tell him that I’m good.” 

“I will, Miss. Here, my card. You can always call me when you need something” he hesitates, “or when you just need someone to talk to.” 

“Thank you. This is so kind.”

“You are never alone, Miss.”

“Thank you”, you say, bowing at him. He is so kind. God, you want to grab him and tell him to run before it’s too late.

He bows as well, “good night, Miss.”

“Good night.”

You watch him leave. He gives you one last look out of the police car and a kind wave, then drives off. 

You close the door with a curse. This just sobered you up. The young policeman’s kindness just sobered you up. You check his name on the card he handed you. Jeon Jungkook. Why someone like him? He never should have found his way into this field of work. 

You look at the takeout food next, feeling your stomach twist. You are important to Yoongi. Holy fuck.

It’s been eight weeks since you left him. You don’t feel better. The cigarette you shared was two weeks ago and yet you still feel as if it was sticking to your lungs. Each time you breathe out, you swear you can taste him. It almost suffocates you and keeps you from relaxing. So you leave your depressing place for a walk to the kiosk. You read somewhere that walks are good for one’s mental health. You can’t agree. Walks force you to be outside where people are loud and fucking stink.

The vendor must be fucking with you. The day is bright, but the kiosk is closed again. You bang your fist against the closed door, cursing loudly. You want your fucking smokes is that too much to ask? This city is fucking shit.

You’ll just call someone who will always help. You saved him as Jay. His real name is Hoseok. You don’t say his real name in public. He doesn’t say yours. Yoongi sometimes called him his best friend, but what is such a title out of the mouth of the most apathetic man you know? You were his girlfriend too and look at where this has gotten you, living as an outlaw in the shit and dirt of this city.

Like always, Hoseok lets the phone ring four times then he picks up.

“Flames are hot”, he says.

“And the arsonist works hard”, you answer him.

“Hyacinth, it’s good to hear your voice”, there is finally a smile in his voice now that you answered the code correctly.

“The same goes for you, Jay.”

“What’s up? I haven’t heard from you in ages.”

“Nothing much. I’m out of smokes.”

“The corner in twenty?”

“Yeah.”

You and he end the call at the same time. Twenty minutes later you meet. He wears black overalls and smudged eyeliner. He says it keeps the char easier to hide. Like always, he greets you with a quick hug.

“What do you got?” you ask him.

“Whatever you want.” He opens his bag. “I’ve got cigarettes, but something stronger too”, he says, scurrying around the contents of the bag with his fingers. He always has burn marks on them, but somehow they are never dirty.

“What do fifty bucks buy?”

“For you? Two packs of cigarettes and two joints. That’s a steal.”

“Fuck dude, you’re getting expensive.”

“Yeah well, a man’s gotta eat.”

“Fine, I’ll take it.”

You and he exchange goods. He makes small talk.

“But why are you here with me? Did Suga run out of goods?”

Suga is Yoongi’s codename in public. The sound of it almost brings bile into your throat. You did such a good job in forgetting him and now the memory of him is as fresh as a new day. At least you like to pretend that you are doing a good job at forgetting him. Your heart knows better though.

“We, uhm…”

Hoseok exhales sharply, “again?”

You nod your head.

“When?”

“More than two months ago.”

“Damn, that’s long.”

“Yeah, I’m serious about it.”

He cocks his brow up.

“I am”, you insist just a little snappishly.

“Alright”, he closes his bag, “I gotta go now.”

“Already?”

He looks around nervously. Almost as if he didn’t want to be seen with you.

“Yup. Use the stuff wisely, I won’t have new stuff for a while.”

“Seriously?”

He nods his head and salutes you nonchalantly.

“See you around.”

“See…you?”

He turns his back to you and walks off quickly, soon disappearing into the busy crowd. Is this your fate? Even the people closest to you avoid you now that you aren’t Yoongi’s anymore? Were you truly only worth something as his little thing? You ball your hands into fists, bending the joints this way. You have to leave this fucking place. There is actually nothing holding you here anymore.

That night the phone terror starts. Numbers keep calling you over and over and over again. You pick up the first time, only to have to listen to the most hurtful things another human has ever said to you. The voice wasn’t Yoongi’s, but you still blame him. Now that you aren’t his thing anymore, you became free food to whoever had been waiting to make your life a living hell. You turn off your phone after an hour and go to sleep with the help of Hoseok’s joints.

The doorbell wakes you the next morning. You consider not answering because it’s probably just one of his goons wanting to terrorise you. But whoever is ringing the doorbell is stubborn, forcing you out of your bedroom. You look through the door cam first.

That young officer. He is in full uniform.

You open the door hesitantly.

“Good morning”, he greets you with a wave and a smile.

“Good morning”, you murmur. Your mouth is as dry as a fucking desert. You are also so hungry that you could throw up in his face right now.

“How are you feeling, Miss?”

“Good.”

“That’s good to hear.” He says and shows you a package which he kept hidden behind his back all this time. He smiles brightly and proudly. “Tada!”

“What’s that?”

“I caught the package thief, Miss.”

“Are you serious?” you gasp and your eyes instinctively drift to the car you have noticed parked outside your unit for days. The door is opened and someone is sitting in the backseat. He looked cuffed to the seat. You glance at the young officer and the shiteating, proud grin he is sporting. He has been watching you? Did Yoongi tell him to?

“Wait. You’re actually serious.”

“Very serious. For you, Miss”, he says and shoves the package into your face.

“Uhm, uh. Thanks”, you accept it, putting it under your arm. “Have you been watching me?”

“Did you notice the car? Sorry, I thought that I was better hidden. I’m still new to all of this. But I caught the thief, heh.” He points at himself with his thumbs. “That’s my first real arrest.”

He manages to drag an honest smile to your lips. He is kind of adorable in a way.

“That’s cool. Thank you for taking care of it. Now I’ve got nothing to worry about anymore.”

He grins and nods his head, studying your features afterwards. He opens his mouth.

“Jeon are you there? Over”, his walkie talkie interrupts whatever he wanted to ask you. He takes it off his chest harness.

“I’m here, Kim Sir. Over.”

“Come to the precinct. We need reinforcements. Over.”

“Coming right away, Sir. I caught a thief right now, Sir. Over.”

A pause where the higher officer is definitely baffled by his confession.

“Good job, Jeon. Over.”

The young officer giggles before he speaks again, doing so as seriously as possible.

“Thank you, Kim Sir. I am taking the criminal to the precinct. Over.”

“Understood. Over.”

He puts the walkie talkie back on its harness and gives you a sorry smile.

“That was my boss. My other boss, not your friend who is the boss of this boss. Anyways. I have to go now, duty calls. Are you going to be okay, Miss?”

“I am. Thank you for your kindness.”

“Anytime, Miss. Uhm, have a good day”, he says and leaves with a wave of his hand. He waves again as he drives off. You retort it, staring at his car until it disappears behind a corner. You sigh deeply. He is so nice. Why someone like him? Why does this life always find people like him?

It’s been ten weeks since you left him. You read somewhere that walks are good for your mental health. You still can’t agree. Walks force you to be outside where people are still loud and still fucking stink. But it’s better than staying in your apartment. You’ve got new neighbours since Monday. They keep fucking like actual animals. They fucked when you left your place tonight. You were this close to kicking their door in and slaughtering them like pigs. You opted for a walk in the end.

You walk for a while then sit down by an empty bench next to the river. It is quiet. Nobody is really here. At least nobody important. A couple, how disgusting. A late night jogger, clearly a man. A homeless person, who uses another bench as their bed. You hate looking at homeless people because you feel helpless seeing them. You stopped being on the bright side of the law because of people like them. You thought that maybe if you stole from the corrupt men in power often enough, you would be able to help the ones who truly needed it. But you never managed to actually achieve anything. The homelessness in the city grows, while the pockets of the politicians become fatter and fatter in wealth. You fucking hate this city. It is rotten to the core.

“Look who we have here. If that isn’t our pretty little Hyacinth.”

You aren’t quick enough to get up to leave and then you already have two men throwing their arms over your shoulders while a third is grabbing the back of your head from behind. You try to reach for your knife but can’t. Their grip on you is too good.

“What are you doing here all alone?”

Their voices are familiar and one look at them confirms your suspicions. It’s them. The same three underlings who stole your groceries months ago.

“Leave me alone”, you tell them.

“Why should we? You are all alone. If the boss knew we’re leaving you alone, he’d grow angry.”

“I can take care of myself.”

“Now, now don’t be like that. You’re just a girl and there are many dangerous men out there.”

You look to your side. One of them is licking their lips like a hungry animal.

“Yeah? And you’re being fucking inappropriate. Leave me alone”, you spit, shaking off their arms.

They let you. Just as they let you stand up and take your bag.

“Goodnight”, you tell them and leave. Quickly. You walk a good hundred feet until you finally dare to look over your shoulder only to realise in horror that they are following you. Quickly.

You can defend yourself. You know how to kill, but you also know when you are outnumbered. And three bigger men against a woman is sadly never going to end well for the woman. You hate this city and you hate this life. You know that their words were nothing but provocation. They know you aren’t with Yoongi anymore, that you aren’t under his protection anymore and that in some weird way, you sullied his honour. You also know how people who bring dishonour to the gangs of this city are punished. The men are murdered and the women, well, they are murdered too but not before being sullied themselves. You hate this city and you hate this life. This life which is going to fucking end for you soon.

You dare to look over your shoulder one more time. They are so close that you can see the hunger in their eyes. No. Nononononono. It can’t end like this. You were supposed to leave this city, start a new life, forget about Yoongi. You are not going to die here in this dirty, shitty park far away from your dream.

Thump.

You bounce back from the impact, letting out a blood curling scream. It was instinct. Just as it is instinct of the person you ran into to grasp you by your arms and pull you closer again.

“Let me go! Help! Help me!”

“Quiet”, the person hisses and shakes you. This voice sounded different. Familiar in an almost intimate way.

You dare to shift your eyes to them.

Yoongi.

“I, I, I”, you stutter, feeling delirious in both fear and shock. You grab his shirt, twisting it to get closer to him. The act is intimate and out-of-place but you are too frightened to think clearly. 

Yoongi brushes over the state of your glassy eyes to look over your shoulder. There are three men suddenly scurrying away, using the darkness to hide. He managed to get their faces.

He looks back at you. Your eyes meet. A little bit of clarity returns to you. What are you doing? Your fingers soften around his shirt. 

“I don’t…”

“Come on, we’re going home”, he say sternly and puts an arm around your waist, dragging you with him like this.

You follow him all the way to his car. You even let him sit you down on the passenger seat and you even stay seated when he rounds the car to get to the driver side. You think that you are in shock because you don’t protest when he starts the car, nor when he drives off. You simply stare outside with your knees turned to him because your body acts against your consciousness. The city passes you by in flashes of neon colours. His car smells like his cologne and leather. He has no music playing. 

Yoongi glances at your face. You have your head against the window, squeezing your hands between your thighs. The neon lights illuminate your features each time he passes by another light source. He can see that you are trying not to shake.

He takes a deep breath, shifting his eyes to the road. He has to grip the steering wheel, otherwise his hands would shake in anger.

“Should we get dinner?”

His voice rips you from whatever trance you were in. You sit up straight, looking at him. He is gripping the steering wheel to the point his knuckles pale. His long hair is hanging into his face tonight. A turquoise varsity jacket adorns him. His scar wasn’t hidden behind concealer. He wasn’t working his day job today. What was he doing at the park? Why was he there?

“Take me home”, you order him.

“I am.”

“No. Home. Not your place.”

“My place is your home”, he gets out through gritted teeth.

“No, it isn’t. Not anymore.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Did you see what they were doing to me?”

“No.”

You are lost for words for a moment. The tears come afterwards.

“Stop the car.”

Yoongi looks at you because your voice was shaking. He holds his breath at the sight of your tears.

“What?” he makes sure.

“Stop. The. Car. Now.”

He laughs and shakes his head.

You pull the knife out on him. He swerves to the side on instinct, fixing the mistake so vigorously, you and he shake in the small space. You don’t let it affect you, holding the knife against his skin.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he hisses.

“Stop the fucking car or I’ll kill us both”, you spit, holding the knife against his throat.

“Fuck”, he growls and hits the steering wheel. The car rolls to a stop.

“Get out”, you threaten.

“I am. Fuck.”

He follows your orders because you have his life at blade’s end. He still slams the door closed. You leave the car instantly.

“What the fuck were you thinking? You could have killed us both” he tries to scold you, but you silence him.

“I’m talking now”, you roar.

Yoongi closes his mouth because he has never heard you like this before.

“You are such an asshole! Each day I regret the moment I met you! You are the worst thing that ever happened to me!”

Yoongi gulps. 

“I had a life before you. I had dreams and ambitions and, and goals and…a chance. I could have had a good life. I was supposed to use my degree to help people but you ruined everything for me.”

He rounds the car in big steps, coming so close to you that you smell his breath. It smells like chewing gum. 

“You could have achieved something? What exactly did you achieve as a lawyer? Mhm, what did you achieve? This city is fucked.”

“Yes, because you fucked it!” you hit his chest. He doesn’t budge, but also doesn’t stop you. “You fucked it and you fucked me and I hate you for it!”

“Don’t blame me for your decisions. I gave you a chance to leave me back then. You were the one who stayed.”

You inch closer until your lips are almost touching. Yoongi exhales shakily, placing his hand on your hip. 

“And I will regret this decision till the day I die”, you whisper, breaking the closeness.

You slip out of his hold. He follows you in a small stumble and a trembling gasp. 

“I never want to see you again. Are we clear?” you hiss at him.

“Don’t be fucking ridiculous, you don’t want this”, he hisses back at you.

“You’re wrong, I don’t want you. I thought I still did, but I don’t. You don’t care about me, it’s finally so fucking obvious to me. You don’t fucking care.”

“You don’t know what you’re saying.”

“They are terrorising me, Yoongi!” You finally scream. “I wake up to people ringing my doorbell in the middle of the night, I have to keep my phone turned off because the phone calls don’t stop. I keep getting my stuff stolen and, and I thought I was going to be raped tonight! They are terrorising me and you called it not your problem!”

“No, you-”

“I’ve been living in constant fear, our friends don’t even look at me anymore, I haven’t eaten in days and I can’t-”, you stop yourself. He doesn’t even deserve your anger anymore. “-you know what? Fuck this and fuck you. I’m leaving.”

You turn your back to him and leave. 

He says your name and takes your hand. He pulls, tries to turn you to him. But you rip yourself free again.

“Don’t go”, he says.

You don’t listen.

“I’m ordering you to stay”, he sounds desperate, yelling your name, “I am ordering you!” 

He can yell as much as he wants to. You don’t listen to him anymore. The subway station isn’t far. You will make an exception and take it tonight. Even if you hate it. It stinks. Just like the rest of this shitty city.

You are going to leave. Once you are home, you are going to start packing and then you are going to leave. You will call V. You don’t know his real name, but he can change your identity as quickly as others change their socks. You will call V and tell him to have your passport ready the day after tomorrow. You will pay him with the money you have under your pillow and then leave for somewhere clean. Maybe somewhere with lots of mountains. You always heard that the air at these places is breathable.

You call V the same night. He tells you that two days is too short and to wait another week. So you wait. Your bags have been packed. You live out of them in your own place. You don’t leave it. You are scared. With how little Yoongi cared about your situation, you doubt that he told his men to stop. You are scared that if you left again, they would finally go through with what they couldn’t finish back then.

The doorbell rings during a rainy, dark night. You flinch awake to the point where you feel sick to the stomach. The lights are turned on instantly eventhough you know not to do that in such a situation. You can’t think clearly. You just want this to be over. All of it.

You run to the front door because you suddenly feared that it was unlocked. It isn’t, but you can watch someone push an envelope under your door. The shadow blocking the light outside leaves the moment the letter is inside your apartment.

You don’t want to open it at first, staring at it as if someone had planted a bomb in your apartment. Fuck it, if that is how you die then so be it, you think in the end and bend down to pick it up. It feels different in your fingers. Sophisticated. Intimate. The envelope is glued closed as if someone licked the glue stripe and the faint smell of well-known cologne lingers on the paper. You open it with shaky fingers.

A letter. It is heavy and folded once. You open it, gasping when three photographs fall out of it and onto the ground. You don’t know what is on them because they landed on their face side. So you read the letter first.

“It has always been mine as well.”

Written in black ink and a familiar handwriting. This is Yoongi’s writing.

With even shakier hands, you pick up the pictures. You feel sick for a moment, gawking at the cruel pictures with your hand thrown over your mouth. The three men who terrorised you. Their mutilated corpses look back at you. He tortured them to death.

You rip the door open, stumbling onto the balcony. You look down at what tripped you. Two bags of your favourite takeout food and a six pack of water. Both clearly fresh. So it was him. Yoongi must be here somewhere. You look into the distance. The night is loud and blurry in a thunderstorm. The streets are empty. The ghost of your past is gone again. You squint your eyes. A person.

“Yoongi!” you call out, unable to realise that you are smiling and waving your hand.

The person moves. Oh. It was just the shadow of a tree. For just a moment you had hoped that the dark shape was him waiting for you. It was just a tree…and you were happy that if could have been Yoongi. The realisation hurts.

“Fuck”, you press out, going back inside. The lump in your throat makes it hard to breathe. You stumble back to bed, halting for a moment when you pass your suitcases.

It has always been mine as well. His words repeat themselves in your head. All this time, you thought that he didn’t care. All this time, you thought that your terror left him cold. Your eyes drift over the empty takeout boxes from the noodle place. You still haven’t cleaned them up. He made sure that you were properly fed for days back then. A glance at the new stuff he got tonight. He is still making sure that you are. Your eyes drift over the package next. He made sure that they stopped getting stolen. You look at the pictures in your hands. He made sure that they would never hurt you again. All this time, you were so blinded by your own anger that you missed how he had always looked out for you. You missed his way of showing you that you were important to him.

It has always been his problem as well.

Something inside you breaks and you scream. You don’t know what you scream for, but you scream. It hurts so much. It hurts so much because you will still leave. He will hurt you again if you stay. All his efforts healed your heart and it hurts so much because you will still leave. You were meant to stay broken hearted. Leaving would have been so easy this way. Now it hurts like a bitch. But you can’t sway. You have to leave this place. It will chew up what little is left of you until you truly cease to exist.

V comes to your place the next day. He rings your doorbell. It wakes you from the uncomfortable sofa you fell asleep on last night. You groan as you sit up and you barely want to open your eyes as you stumble to the door.

You open it without checking the camera first.

“Took you long en- you?”

Jungkook, the young officer, greets you with a smile.

“I swear I’m not stalking you.”

You have a headache today, so it is difficult not to snap at him. He is also not the person you wanted in front of your door today.

“I’m starting to doubt that.”

He laughs, “it’s not that. I talked to my boss. Your friend, the boss of the other boss. Sorry, anyways. I need you to come to the precinct with me.”

“What? Why?”

“Okay so, this is actually so cool and I shouldn’t even be telling you this, but you’re my boss’ friend so I guess it’s okay”, he begins with sparkling eyes, “turns out that the package thief is actually a serial thief and you aren’t the first one he stole from. Isn’t that cool? It’s like in those movies. Those cool cop movies.”

“Really? He stole from more people?” You highly doubt that.

“Yeah”, he laughs as he answers you, nodding his head excitedly, “now we’re calling in everyone who he stole from so we can take their statements. My boss says that we can’t keep the thief locked up for long otherwise.”

You know that this wasn’t really how the law works. After all, you were once a lawyer who was fucking good at her job. Is Yoongi trying to drag you back to him? First he tries to change your mind by killing your bullies and now he is trying to do the final blow by abusing his power as police chief? You check the time. Couldn’t the young officer have come later? You could have had your passport already and be far, far away from this place.

“Can I just give it to you here?” you ask him.

“Mhm”, he tilts his head to the side, “no, I don’t think that it works like this. I’m sorry, Miss. The captain said that it’s important that all the victims come into the precinct.”

You have to give Yoongi that. He is real clever about it. That means however that you can’t escape this situation. Any more resistance from you would make you suspicious.

You give up with a sigh. “Can I just change into something different?”

“Of course, Miss.”

The young officer lets you sit in the passenger seat. He is so new at all of this. With such naivety he tells you his entire life story. That he was from the countryside and that his dream has always been to be a policeman in the city. That he studied hard for years and that he completed his enlistment with honour just so he could be a proper officer. He sounds so proud of himself that each second with him makes you hate his presence more and more. He is so fucking stupid and it angers you. Why would he throw away his life like that? Why someone like him?

You are led to one of the precinct’s interrogation rooms and are told to wait there. The table is decked with different foods.

“What’s all that?” you ask Jungkook.

“Breakfast, Miss.”

“Did your captain tell you to do that?”

“He said that wanted to make sure you get your breakfast because we called you in so early. The captain really cares for the citizens.”

You stifle a scoff. Sure he does.

“Mhm, I see.”

“Either way, it won’t take long”, the young officer bids his goodbyes and leaves you in the interrogation room.

His words were a lie. You wait and wait and wait, but nothing happens. There are no clocks in this godforsaken room, but you still know that it has to be hours. You didn’t want to eat the breakfast at first, glaring at the two-way mirror because in your mind, Yoongi was behind it, watching you and making sure that you ate. You didn’t want to give him the satisfaction at first, but had to in the end. The body begins working against one’s will when it is starving and the breakfast looked way too good. You eat all of it, then glare at the mirror again. You are still left alone and more time passes. It is as if they are trying to wear you down, as if you were the criminal in this situation. Granted, you are a criminal, but only Yoongi knows that and right now you are a poor civilian having done nothing wrong. You know that it’s Yoongi’s doing. That he somehow wants to terrorise you.

So when the door finally opens and he walks into the room, you almost throw the empty bowl at his head.

“Forgive the wait, Miss but something came up”, he says nonchalantly, flicking through some papers.

His second in command Kim Namjoon and the young officer Jeon Jungkook are behind him, which is why he is putting up this act. You grind your teeth.

“I already started to wonder if I’m in danger here”, you say way too sweetly.

“That depends on how you are going to answer our questions”, he says and sits down on the chair in front of you.

Jungkook stays by the door while Kim Namjoon stands a little to your side.

You look around yourself. He is trying to intimidate you.

“What’s that supposed to mean? I thought that I’m here to give my statement because of my stolen packages.”

Yoongi glances up from the papers. This is the first time your eyes meet after your fight and he killed your bullies. If only the others in this room would know how much blood he has on his hands and to which length he is willing to go to protect you. There were times where you would have dragged him over the table and kissed him senseless, but not anymore. You are stronger than your urges, even if it hurts your heart. You can’t give in again. If you do, he will take you for granted again. You won’t be happy with him. You finally have to fucking understand that.

“You’re right. You are here because of that”, he says dryly.

“Good. It started on May sixteen. I came home at around seven ten and noticed that my packages were missing. Two were stolen back then, but in total he stole eight packages”, you say and proceed to tell him the exact dates with the time as well as what was stolen.  

“You seem to know how such hearings work”, he says after he wrote down what you said.

“I had a few hours to practice what I was going to say”, you say with a poisonous smile.

One Yoongi retorts with just as much poison and a deep hum.

“Apologies again.”

“Don’t worry, I know how hard the police works at keeping this honourable city safe.”

He tongues his cheek. You give him a victorious smirk. This cut. Good. He takes a deep breath and releases it through his nose, reaching into his suit pocket to pull out a cigarette. He gets as far as to put it to his lips and then Kim Namjoon already speaks up.

“Captain. Smoking is prohibited in this building.”

“Fuck”, Yoongi presses out and takes the cigarette between two fingers to tap it against the table instead.

“Smoking is bad for you either way”, you say.

He tongues his cheek again. You know that he wants to curse at you right now, but can’t. He has to put up a friendly act.

“I know, can’t shake the habit”, he says and studies your face, “so what now?”

“Sir?” Kim Namjoon is rightfully confused. Yoongi slipped up.

“I don’t know, I was never in such a place before. Do you still need to take my information?” you act oblivious.

“We already have everything.”

“Great. Then I can go?” you ask, fluttering your lashes innocently.

“I don’t know yet.”

“Sir?” “What? Why?”

Yoongi shifts in his chair until he manspreads like an idiot. He crosses his arms in front of his chest.

“What are you going to do now?” he asks you.

“Uhm…is this still part of my hearing?” you ask, glancing at Kim Namjoon.

“No of course not, Miss. Please, follow me.”

“Sit. Down.”

The room is silent for a moment. You glare at Yoongi while Namjoon and Jungkook gawk in complete confusion. Their captain acts out of character. There is no reason to keep the innocent lady here any longer. This isn’t like him at all. He has been fidgeting all day, barely drank his coffee, went for far too many smoke breaks and now this. The officers have no explanation for their captain’s sudden behaviour.

“What is the reason for this?” you ask him.

“Just safety precautions. We wouldn’t want our honest citizen to get into danger”, he says coldly, “now answer my question. What are your plans now, Miss?”

“I will go home.”

“Where is that home?”

“Sir, I don’t know if that is necessary.”

“Shut up, Kim.”

Namjoon gulps, exchanging a confused look with Jeon Jungkook. This is really not like their captain.

Yoongi straightens up and leans forward so he is closer to you.

“Where is that home, Miss?”

You lower your eyes in anger.

“I don’t know yet, I’m planning to leave this city.”

“What?” his voice shook as he spoke. His fingers close and break the cigarette that way. His eyes almost bore holes into yours from how deeply he stares into them.

“This city’s become too depressing for me. I plan on leaving it for good.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“Yes, I do. There is nothing holding me here anymore.”

“Yes, there is.”

“No, there really isn’t. I will leave.”

Bang!

You flinched back. Namjoon and Jungkook tense up as well.

Yoongi slammed his hand on the table, jumping to his feet.

“No the fuck you won’t!” he yells.

“Sir? What are you doing?!”

“Excuse me? It’s my right as an honest citizen to move”, you act oblivious as well.

“Keep her here”, he talks to Jungkook, pointing at him, “lock her up and keep her here.”

“Under what pretence, Sir?” the young officer asks with widened eyes.

“I, I, I don’t know. Refusal to, to, to cooperate or some shit like that”, Yoongi never stutters and he never paces, but he is currently doing both of those things.

“Sir…is…this legal?” Jungkook asks shyly.

Yoongi is by Jungkook’s side within a few steps, grabbing him by the collar.

“Do as you are told, Jeon! Unless you want to lose this job!” Yoongi growls, making Jungkook whimper with fear.

“Captain Min, you are stepping out of place”, Kim Namjoon speaks up, dragging him away from Jungkook, “and get off this poor officer’s neck. He is just doing his job.”

Yoongi whips around, now targeting his anger at Namjoon.

“If he was doing his fucking job, he would lock her up”, he hisses, pointing at you.

“I need you to step out for a moment, Captain”, Namjoon says and gestures Jungkook to open the door. The young officer obeys, holding it open as Namjoon shoves a protesting Yoongi out of the room. He closes the door again, muting the vivid fighting Yoongi was doing with Namjoon outside.

He meets your eyes, smiling awkwardly.

“Please forgive the Captain, Miss. He is very concerned about his citizens’ safety.” He is a terrible liar, but you don’t blame him. If you were in his situation, you would have no idea how to explain such a situation to a supposed innocent citizen either.

“Don’t worry. I, I’m just wondering if maybe I can finally leave? I’m sorry, this just really scared me and I just want to lie down at home now”, you act shaken up, looking at the young officer with pleading eyes. 

“Of course, Miss. Our honest apologies again, Miss. Please follow me”, he says and leads you out of the room.

Yoongi and Namjoon are still arguing, but stop when they see you come out. You lock eyes with Yoongi for the briefest of moments. 

He closes the distance and grabs your wrist, dragging you with him with such vigour that nobody truly gets time to act. Not even you know what was happening to you until you find yourself in his office with the door slammed shut. 

“What are you doing?” you gasp.

“Shut the fuck up, you’re not the one asking this question right now!”

“Yoongi, lower your voice. This isn’t the place for screams.”

He steps closer to you, pointing at your face in warning.

“I have every fucking right to scream right now and you know that”, he presses out through gritted teeth.

“Why? Because I finally don’t need you anymore?”

“You can’t move. What the fuck are you thinking?”

“I’m-”

‘I'm not done”, he interrupts you, “I killed them for you. I did it. Just for you. Because your safety matters to me. I care.” He hits his own chest. “I showed you that I care and you’re gonna leave?”

You hate that you love him, but not for the usual reasons. You hate it because it hurts. You are going to leave despite not wanting to. You love him, perhaps you always will but you are also going to leave. 

You nod your head.

Yoongi exhales shakily, taking a stumbling step back. He stares at you as if you were the ghost whose haunting hurts him the most. He huffs out air, rubs his hand over his mouth, then runs it through his hair and down the side of his neck.

“I’ll kill the thief”, he says in the end.

“What?” 

“I'll make it seem like suicide. He’ll look like a pisser who couldn’t take prison and killed himself.”

“Are you out of your mind? He’s just a thief.”

“Well, what more do you need?!” he screams

“Nothing! I don’t need anything from you!”

“Why not? I can give you whatever you want!”

“Look at you. Now that you finally realised, I’m actually serious about the breakup, you wanna act like you care.”

“I care”, his voice broke, but you are both too angry to acknowledge it, “i-i-if I knew that you- I just-” He breathes in, breathes out, rubs his mouth, then his neck. “It can’t end like this. It can’t.”

“It can. I’m done begging you for everything.”

Yoongi steps closer.

“I can-”

“Sir? What is the meaning of this?” 

Kim Namjoon and Jeon Jungkook are in the office. The rest of the precinct gawks at you and Yoongi through the doorway. The latter lifts his hands and steps back. His fingers are shaking. 

“The captain just voiced his worries for my move. Don’t worry about it, Kim Sir”, you lie and turn to leave, “may I finally leave?”

Namjoon tells Jungkook to handle it with a nod of his head. The young officer points at the open door.

“Please after you, Miss.”

Yoongi says your name. 

You look at him over your shoulder, despite knowing you shouldn’t. He takes a step closer, lifting his brows in pleading. Don’t give in. Don’t give in. Don’t give in. You ball your hands to fists and turn your back to him.

Yoongi tries your name again, hoping for another look. One which doesn’t come. 

“Come back”, he tries, but gets stopped by Namjoon.

You can hear them talk as you leave.

“What the fuck’s your issue, man? You’ve been weird all day and now you’re screaming at citizens?”

“Watch your tone.”

“Hyung, I’m not here as your colleague right now. I’m here as your friend.”

“She’s gonna leave, she can’t…”

Jungkook leads you away from the office before you can hear Yoongi’s full answer. 

“Are you crying, Miss??”

“Hm? Oh that, don’t mind them. It’s just…” Your heart is broken and you want to run back to Yoongi. “...forgive me, I’m just a little shaken from everything.”

“I’m sorry, Miss. The captain isn’t normally like this.”

“It’s alright. I know how Yoongi can be sometimes.”

“Yoongi?” Jungkook asks, glancing at the captain’s office. He wonders what kind of friends you and he are. Maybe Those kind of friends? Is that why you are important to the captain? 

“I mean…sorry, I don’t know why I said that. I just wish to go home now.”

“Of course, Miss.”

“Oh god, I don’t even have money for a bus ticket with me”, you murmur to yourself, looking for your wallet. This is all a scheme to get Jungkook to drive you home again. You are worried that if he didn’t, Yoongi would somehow get to you before you could reach the station.

“Don’t worry about it, Miss. As a policeman, it is my duty to make sure that you get home safely.”

“Really? I wouldn’t want to waste your time.”

“Of course, Miss.”

And so he takes you home and you hate yourself because of it. So it began. You were the first person who used his kindness to her advantage. You were the drop beginning the inevitable filling of the tank until one day it will swap over. And once that happens, it is almost impossible to stop the leak. Fuck, you are just as terrible as everyone else in this city.

But the young officer is oblivious to what you just did, driving you home with a kind smile on his face. He even walks you to your door and stays as you unlock it. Your neighbours are fucking again. He glances at their door, then awkwardly at you.

“Yeah, I’ve got new neighbours. You can’t go over there and flash your badge and tell them to shut up, can you?”

“Of course I can, Miss. Just one mom-”

“No stop, I was joking”, you stop him, studying him with exhausted eyes. You are so sorry. You are so fucking sorry.

“Ah, okay. Please forgive me, I always take everything way too seriously”, he says, scratching his own neck shyly. He furrows his brows. “What’s the matter, Miss?”

“Can I tell you something?”

“Of course, Miss.”

“Run.”

“What?”

“Run back to your hometown. Run and never look back.”

“Excuse me?” he laughs in confusion, furrowing his brows harder.

“You’re a good person, Jeon Jungkook. This city will fucking ruin you.”

“I…uh…” He laughs nervously. “I don’t seem to follow, Miss. Sorry.”

“You don’t need to get it, just listen to me. Please.”

“O…kay? I uhm…”

“Thank you for driving me home. I’ll think of you sometimes in my new home.”

“Miss, are you okay?”

“I am. You don’t need to worry about me anymore. Just promise me to run.”

“I promise?”

“Good. Be happy, Jeon Jungkook.”

“Miss, I-”

You close the door on him and lock it. You don’t expect him to knock or ring the bell. He is too proper to annoy you this way. You check the camera. He stares at the closed door for a few moments longer, looking confused. He lifts his hand to knock, hesitates and turns his back to the door instead, leaving down the steps to drive off. You know that you confused him, but you had to. Please let it be enough to save him.

V arrives later that day. He is stressed and clearly in a hurry.

“What’s wrong? You look like you need to be somewhere or like you need to shit. Do you need to shit?”

“What? No”, he sounds out of breath as well as annoyed, “I’m risking my ass being here. I’ve got your stuff. It’s the only thing except mine that I managed to save. Give me the money, quick.”

“Save?” you probe, giving him the money.

He stuffs it into his boxers hastily, looking over his shoulder again.

“My place got raided by cops. I was at the market getting food, then came back to five cop cars in front of my place. I barely escaped. If I didn’t always carry my stuff with me, I’d have been fucked.”

“What?!”

“Sorry, Hyacinth. Gotta leave the city for a while. I wish you all the best.”

“V, what the fuck?”

“Here’s to never seeing each other again, aye?” he jokes, laughing nervously. It’s a good thing he said. Never seeing each other again meant that you and he managed to escape safely.

“Wait. Where will you go?”

“I can’t tell you. You know I can’t.”

“Yeah, just…be careful.”

“You too.”

He leaves and you know that he will be successful. If there is one person who won’t ever be found it is V. 

You are in a trance for the rest of the day. Yoongi raided V’s place. He went as far as to betray his own people just to make sure that you wouldn’t leave. Carrying your new passport feels like a trophy, as much as it feels like a curse. Leaving this city won’t be as easy anymore now that he knows. You are so fucking stupid for telling him, but you didn’t want to miss out on his reaction when he found out. The small moment of satisfaction seems skippable now that you know how far he is willing to go to keep you close. And because V came as late as he did, your means of escape don’t drive anymore either. You have to wait for the earliest bus if you wanted to or not. Fuck, you did this to yourself. You stupid fucking woman. Look at you. You have this big, honourable degree and still manage to get yourself into shitty situations over and over again.

You go to sleep with a gun under your pillow. You won’t risk anything.

You don’t get a lot of sleep and then a noise wakes you. You heard it as clear as day. Someone unlocked your front door. He sent men to get you. Now he’s gone too far. You jump out of bed and grab your loaded gun, tiptoeing to a spot from where you could observe the apartment. You have to be strategic about it. First count the men, then calculate the fastest way to shoot them, then act. The door closes and locks again. Clever bastards, they want to make sure that you don’t flee. Oh, you are going to have a blast killing them. One last little thing to leave Yoongi before you abandon him.

The automatic lights turn on. Got you, assholes.

The first enters your vision.

“Hm?”

Yoongi. Clearly drunk, he is dragging his feet over the floor, using the wall as support. No one else follows him. So he came here alone. 

Overtaken by anger, you jump out of hiding and at him.

Yoongi collides with the wall, feeling the cold nuzzle of the gun press against his chin. He drops the keys and flowers he was carrying, lifting his hands in defeat.

“Careful, it’s just me”, he lulls.

“Get the fuck out of my house”, you spit, carrying murder in your eyes. 

“I can’t believe you’re still hiding your keys under the flower pot. Don’t make me so worried, anyone could enter.”

“I’m gonna count to three and if you haven’t disappeared by then, I’ll shoot.”

“Can we talk?”

“One.”

“I know I fucked up. I can’t stop thinking about you. Please, can we try again?”

“Two.”

“I promise I changed. You were right, I was a joke. But I wanna do better now.”

“Three.” “I’m sorry!”

Yoongi squeezes his eyes shut. His death never comes. He peels his eyes open again.

You are staring, panting heavily. Tears are in your eyes.

“I’m sorry”, he whispers.

This is the first time he is the one to say these words first. It feels so good, but you can’t give in again. You made up your mind to leave…didn’t you? You study the state of him. He is heavily intoxicated. He looks the way and reeks of it.

“You’re drunk.” 

He nods his head, furrowing his brows. He touches your elbows, caressing them softly. Such touch you only get when he is drunk.

“I drank because of you. What you said today. I just…don’t move away, please”, he begs, eyes filling with tears.

“So now you care? I wasn’t important to you when I was with you and now that I’m leaving, I’m suddenly important?”

“You’ve always been important.”

“No, I haven’t. You took me for granted.”

“I did and I’m sorry. I never should have taken you for granted. I’ll do better now, please just give me a chance to prove it to you.”

“If I give you a chance again, you’ll just abuse it and hurt me.”

“No, I won’t. Please, I just.” He cups your face, running his thumbs under your eyes as gently as possible. “We were right once. We were so good together. We were a team and, and we had dreams and we made each other happy. I want this back, I wanna try to get this back again please.”

“I just want to be happy, Yoongi”, you press out.

“I’ll make you happy, baby. Please, I-I’ll make you happy again.”

“No, you’re drunk and talking fucking shit.”

“I’ll leave this city if you want me to.”

You falter. He would give up what he built just for you?

“You wouldn’t do that.”

“I would. For you I would. I’d set this whole city on fire and leave with you as it burns to fucking ashes behind us, please.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“Please”, he whispers and drops his forehead against yours, “please, I want to make you happy again.”

You hate that you love him. You hate that he made you addicted to him. This is so awfully him. He gives you enough affection that you get addicted to it then takes it away again. And once he feeds it to you again, you drink it up like an alcoholic. It is always the same. 

“No, you won’t. You’re drunk.”

“Please.”

“Leave my place.”

He presses himself off the wall and grabs the nuzzle of the gun, guiding it right between his brows.

“You have to kill me if you want me gone.”

You gulp. He forces your finger to the trigger. Your airways close up.

“Kill me. Fucking kill me. I can’t live without you anyways.”

You could end it. You’ve got everything. Your suitcases, your papers, the keys of his car he drunkenly drove like an asshole. You’ve got everything you need to escape this place. You could end it, finally make sure that you have no temptation to return. You could end him and your addiction with it. He’s got your finger on the trigger, it needs just one flex and it would be over. But you never wanted him dead. No matter how much you wished for him to be gone, you never wanted him dead. Because in some fucked up way, all you really wanted was for him to put more effort into you.

“No”, you whimper, shaking your head. 

He rips the gun from your fingers and drops it on your dresser. 

“I don’t want to kill you”, you press out, sobbing softly. 

He cradles your face, wiping your tears. 

“I know”, he gets out, nodding his head, “I know you don’t, princess. I know.”

“Yoongi”, you squeak out, twisting his shirt. 

“I’m here, princess. I’m here.”

He pulls you closer until his kiss is just one breath away, feeding on the shaky breath you let ghost against his lips. His drunken eyes gaze at your mouth, his heart is racing in his chest.

“Push me away”, he tells you.

“I hate you.”

“And I love you.”

“Yoongi”, you whimper, finally touching his chest instead of his shirt. 

He moans and pulls you into a kiss. A deep, hungry kiss. 

You pull at his hair to get him off of you as much as you pull him closer, fighting for air. You hate that you love…do you really? Do you really fucking hate it? Do you really hate it when his kiss makes you feel alive again? You spent months feeling out of breath and now it’s gone. You can breathe again. At least metaphorically, physically he’s got you very close to passing out. You push at him to get distance. Air. He lets you breathe, but not escape. He pushes you to your sofa until your legs collide with the back of it. Your shaky breaths intermingle, your shared moans follow. His right hand slides to your ass, his knee lifts to your middle. 

You gasp, grinding down on him. You can’t protest because he kisses you so deeply it feels as if he wanted to consume your soul. He kisses and gropes, kisses and gropes until air is sparse. He gasps.

“Fuck. Fuck, I’m fucked”, he gets out and pulls your head back so he could drag his tongue up your throat. 

It should disgust you, but it doesn’t. You moan, running your nails down his chest and arching your back. He lifts his head, looking at you with drunken, crazed obsession. His fingers just can’t stay still on your body. It is as if he wanted to touch everywhere at all times. The attention makes you short of breath.

“You’re so fucking beautiful.”

You touch his cheek. He leans into your palm, closing his eyes when you trace his scar. You were with him when he got it. It was during a fight. He fought with his fists, his opponent chose the cowardly way and pulled a knife on him. He was lucky that he didn’t lose his eyesight. He hated it at first, but you made him feel handsome. You always looked out for him that way.

“Do you…do you think I’m handsome?” he asks. Such questions you only get when he’s drunk. 

“I do.”

His breath trembles as it leaves him. He drops his hand from your hips to take out his cock. He touches himself, gazing at you as if he needed the view of you to stay hard. And he does. He needs you. You are the only person who can turn him on.

You look at what his hand is doing, gulping heavily. He sighs, gazing at your face. You are as mesmerised by him as you were when everything was still good between you and him. His cock still has the same effect on you.

“Princess?” he tilts your head back up to meet your eyes, using only two fingers under your chin for it. 

You meet his eyes, heart racing unbearably.

“Yes?” One little lift of his brows and you give him the answer he craved. 

You part your legs, tilting your hips closer to him. You nod your head vigorously, gazing at his cock again.

He doesn’t bother to pull his pants down all the way, neither does he care about taking off your panties. He pushes them to the side and stuffs you full of him, gripping the edge of the couch and your right thigh as deep moans leave him. Your right leg is lifted like this, supported by him.

You gasp, tensing up. Your toes curl instantly, your fingers clutch his lower arms. His cock stretches you out and stuffs your walls. It’s not uncomfortable, but it is definitely intense. You gasp again, looking at him with widened eyes.

“I know baby, I know”, he breathes and bottoms out. “It’s been too long. Fuck.” 

He moves, chasing your warmth in drunk, sloppy thrusts. You writhe and gasp repeatedly, scratching the back of his neck. You want to hate that you love him. He should feel like an intruder. You should want to kick and scream for help. But you don’t want to. You feel whole again. No preparation, but he doesn’t hurt. His kiss and touch was enough. Your addiction to him runs so deep that his cock is pure heroin to you.

“Yoongi”, you get out, grabbing his throat. Your thumbs are on his Adam’s apple, threatening to press down.

He smiles, “I love you”, he gasps out and drops his head against yours. His long hair tickles your face, his drunken breath swirls over your skin. He gulps and moans under your fingers, pumping into you with no signs of slowing down. You start losing strength in your calf, standing like this is exhausting, but if you were being honest, you don’t want it to stop. 

“I hate you.”

“Fucking kill me then”, he rasps.

You close your fingers slightly.

“Harder. This isn’t gonna do it.”

“You first.”

“Fuck, baby”, he gets out and lifts you so he could round the sofa with you. He pins you down into the pillows, ripping the panties off of you and kicking his pants off. He pushes into you before you can truly realise what was happening, feeding you all of him until he can’t give any more. He twists the pillow next to your head as he takes on a punishing rhythm. His dark hair hangs into his face, his teeth are bared as he huffs like an angry animal.

“Yoon-”

“I know, baby I know. You already told me, baby. I know”, he whispers, wiping your cheek, “take me, I know you can. You’re my baby, you’re made for me.”

His praise is like medicine to you. This is all you needed. To know that he is still obsessed with you and that you still affect him. 

You close your legs around his hips, keeping him with you this way. You need him to always stay like this. He moans your name, slipping his fingers from your cheek to hold the pillow instead. You told him that you hated him, but your body betrays you. Your eyes betray you. You keep him close, gaze at him as if he was your everything. Yoongi’s head is turning. Not only from the alcohol, but also from being with you again. And from knowing that you still loved him.

Because he loves you so much. He hates himself for taking you for granted. He never should have. You are his everything. The fucking reason why he does all of this. The last three months were torture for him. He started smoking again, drank too much, slept too little, worked too many hours. And if he didn't distract himself with work, he tried thinking up ways of showing you that he was still there for you. He ordered his officers to look out for you, sent food deliveries to your place, parked in front of your place somewhere hidden to watch you smoke on the staircase. He also followed you sometimes after you confessed to him that some of his goons were terrorising you. And each time he followed you, he wished for you to notice him just so he could get a chance at talking to you again. But you never did and Yoongi thought that you will come back again soon. Then you told him that you would move and Yoongi finally broke. He was truly losing you. Three months of hell, of lonely nights and heartbreak and he was truly losing you. 

“I missed you”, he gets out, painting his name against your favourite spots. The eagerness with which you clasp him results in your hips to lift off the pillow, allowing your clit to grind against him each time he bottoms out. The necklaces he is wearing are tangling over your face. They were too long once, but Yoongi cut them to the perfect length so they wouldn't hit your face when you are underneath him. That was six months ago. During a time you thought he didn’t care anymore. You feel so stupid now. His way of showing you that he cared was always there. He was always looking out for you. You were just too blind to see. 

You gasp and whimper, mewl and keen, looking up at him with teary eyes and your fingers closing around nothing. You can’t tell him that you missed him too because you are too overwhelmed. 

“Did you miss me too?” but Yoongi is drunk tonight and when he is drunk he is needy for your affection. 

You nod your head. 

“Say it.”

“I missed you”, you get out, following it up with a sob. 

“Baby, I love you”, he croaks, wiping your tears before dropping his forehead against yours, “I love you, baby, I love you. Don’t leave me again, please.”

“You’re so drunk.”

“Yeah, drunk ‘cause of you. Thought I’ll lose you. Baby, I can’t lose you”, he croaks and shows you his honesty with passionate rolls of his hips. Somehow he goes even deeper than before, he hits your favourite spots even better. 

You arch your back and scream his name, throwing your head back as best as possible. This is electric. Holy shit, he makes you feel good. Your face scrunches up against your will, your feet shake on his back. 

Yoongi admires you with a pounding head and racing heart, repeating what he did before over and over and over again. You react in mewls and moans and screams and he can’t get enough of it. He wants for you to lose your fucking voice because you couldn’t stop screaming for him. Because if you sound like this for him, he makes you happy. It has been too long since you actually screamed this way, so Yoongi is especially affected by tonight.

He laces his fingers with yours – again, he is drunk – and squeezes them needily. He thinks that he is crying too. He watches pearls of something drip onto your face sometimes. His eyes also burn. He doesn’t want it to stop. He is willing to carry his emotions on his sleeve if it meant you were happy again.

“Is this what you needed? Does this finally make you fucking happy?” he gets out, chasing the ecstasy as much as he helps you with your own pleasure trip.

You squeeze his hands back, making him moan your name.

“Ye-yes.”

“Argh”, he growls, trying so much harder to fuck you right. It feels so good. He has to tell you. He stayed silent way too often in the past. You want his efforts and he wants to give them to you. “You feel so good.”

The first confession was hard because he isn’t used to sharing his feelings. It was hard, but it was also ecstatic because your sounds of pleasure became louder and you tightened around him, squeezing his hands happily. 

“You feel so good. You feel so fucking good. You feel so good, princess. You feel…so good”, he can’t stop now that he started, telling you over and over and over again how you make him feel. Good. So good. He feels so good when he is with you. “You are so good. Princess, fuck. I have to..I, I have to- ah!” 

You open your eyes in time with Yoongi collapsing on top of you. He whimpers into the crook of your neck, shaking almost pathetically.

There are two things you always believed to be true about Yoongi. First: When he fucks, his moans are always deep, raspy and growly. Second: He has perfect control over his orgasms. 

Both of these things are getting proven wrong to you right here and now as he whimpers and shakes and paints your walls with his unexpected orgasm. You want to blame the alcohol on it and maybe the months of abstinence, perhaps even the fear of losing you paired with the relief of having you again. Holy fuck, he actually loves you doesn’t he?

“I love you”,  he sobs, hugging you close. 

“Yoongi ah”, he breaks you with his confession and the tenderness with which he holds you. You swear that you can taste colours for a moment. You haven’t felt honestly good in your own skin in months. This right here is what feeling good is. This is it. 

You don’t know who comes down first. You think it is Yoongi, but even if he does, he doesn’t pull out. He lets you shake and throb and clench around him until your moment of peak pleasure is over as well. He holds you silently afterwards, catching his breath in the crook of your neck. He missed your scent like nothing else. Truly, it leaves him so drugged out that he actually finds himself drooling as he smiles like a giddy boy. 

You calm down with his weight atop your chest, his length still inside you and his hair between your fingers. It is still a little stiff and crusty from the variety of hair products he keeps in it during his day job. To think that mere hours ago, you were screaming at each other in his office. It feels so far away to you now. Like a memory of an unbelievable life.

You don’t hate that you love him. You really don’t. 

“How.” He clears his throat. “How are you feeling?”

“Good.”

“Are you sore? Does anything hurt?”

“No, but I’m leaking.”

“Fuck”, he laughs into your shoulder, nibbling on it gently, “sorry, I just…am drunk and missed you.”

“You were pathetic doing that.”

He laughs harder. You and he have a peculiar sense of humour. He knows that you meant it fondly. You laugh as well. He lifts his head at the sound of it, cupping your cheek. 

“If it means you’re laughing, I can live with being pathetic.”

Your heart flutters.

“What’s gotten into you?”

“Booze. Way too much booze.”

You laugh again. His eyes soften, he caresses your face. 

“Definitely too much booze, yeah”, you agree.

“Mhm, fuck.” He cuddles into your shoulder again. “I’m sleeping here.”

“And you think I’d let you?”

He nods his head.

“Fuck, you’re the worst.”

“Am I wrong?”

“No, you’re not.”

You wake up alone the next morning. It hurts. So nothing changed. He got what he wanted, made you addicted again only to leave. Like he always did. And you are left feeling dirty and used and fucking awful. 

You probably would have stayed in bed to cry the entire day if a very worrying noise hadn’t come from outside your door. Someone’s in your kitchen. You roll out of bed and leave the room. You don’t need weapons today. You are angry enough that you will probably be able to beat whoever is dumb enough to break in. 

You cross the corner and stop, lowering your fists.

Yoongi. 

He took a shower and tied all of his wet hair into a messy bun. He is shirtless, wearing a towel around his hips. Music is playing from his phone while on the stove, breakfast is sizzling. 

“You?”

He turns at the sound of your voice, face lighting up instantly. 

“Good morning, beautiful”, he says, closing the distance to take you into a hug. “Did you sleep well?”

You don’t answer him, you push at his chest so you could look at him. You can’t believe that he is still here and that he is making you breakfast.

“What’s the matter?” he asks. 

“Why the fuck are you still here?”

He furrows his brows, “why not?”

“I, I don’t know. I just, just. I thought that…huh? You didn’t leave?”

He frowns in regret for a moment, before leaning in to kiss your cheek. He gives your left buttock an almost playful squeeze afterwards, stepping back to return to the cooking.

“I’m making your favourite. I also cleaned. Your place was a shithole, honestly.”

Still flabbergasted beyond relief, you look around your small apartment. He didn’t just clean up the garbage and tidy, he fully wiped the place down. You check the clock next. It’s way past one at noon. You slept for more than twelve hours. Damn. You never even realised how much sleep these last three months took from you until you finally fell asleep in his arms again and actually stayed asleep. You feel refreshed and not uncomfortable in your own skin. 

Last, you look at Yoongi. He is humming to the music, switching between stirring the eggs in the pan and chopping up some pork belly. 

At first you don’t want to accept that this is actually happening to you, but then the desire to be close to him gets too grande to bear. You almost run to him, colliding with his back in a passionate hug. 

He stumbles and grunts, following it up with a fond chuckle and his big hands rubbing your lower arms. 

“Please don’t make me regret this again. Please.”

He turns in your arms, caressing your waist. He shakes his head, looking at you in ways he hasn’t looked at you in ages. As if he honestly loved you. 

“Can you promise me?”

“I promise you, baby”, he says in a soft voice and locks pinkies with you. 

The gesture is so cute and honest, that you have to stifle a giggle. Your heart hasn’t fluttered like this in ages.

“I have an idea. How about I’ll take next week off and we’re leaving this city for a while? Maybe the mountains? You’d like the air there”, he suggests. 

“Are you serious? Do you actually mean that?”

He nods his head. You and he began swaying to the music, looking at nothing else but the other. 

“But first I gotta sort out the mess I made when I busted V’s place”, he says.

“Yeah true.” You slap his chest. “Fuck you for that. He didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I know, I know. I acted irrationally, I admit. But I’m gonna fix this. You know how easily I can make stuff disappear. He’ll be able to return again in a week or so.”

“I hope you’ll fix this, you idiot you.”

“Mhm, I will and then I’m taking you on a long vacation”, he says, kissing your forehead before hugging you against his chest.

You close your eyes, melting into his chest. 

“And when we’re there, I’m gonna make you breakfast and make you cum and make you smile. Yeah?” he whispers.

“Yeah”, you snicker.

He smells like your shower gel today, but you don’t mind. He hasn’t shown such an actual desire to change in months and it feels so good to receive. You love that you love him. You really do. 

“I love you, Yoongi”, you whisper, feeling him squeeze you for just a moment as your confession overwhelms him. 

“I love you too, princess”, he tells you and he is sober for it because he swore to himself that he won’t need alcohol anymore to be able to show you his affection. 

He is willing to better himself, he truly is and a week later, you and he are in his car on your way to a long vacation in the mountains.