|| Here to kick gum and chew ass, and I'm all out of ass. || he/him it/its ||
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Ive Been Thinking A Lot Lately, Wondering About Who I Am And All That. I Think I Might Be Cupioromantic.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately, wondering about who I am and all that. I think I might be cupioromantic.
Even though I’ve had boyfriends in the past and all that, I’ve never actually had romantic feelings for really any of them. They would ask me out, and I was pretty much like, “alright, bet,” and I think that might’ve just been because I really, really wanted to be with someone. I love the idea of dating someone and having someone hold me and all that mushy romantic stuff, but I’ve never really had a crush on anyone for as long as I can remember. When I was in elementary school, specifically from second to fourth grade, I even used to pretend to have a crush on these guys at my school. Like, pretend in the most obnoxious ways possible because I thought that was normal (haha, autism).
Now that I have this in mind, I feel this sense of clarity mixed in with despair since what this tells me is that I’m never going to experience romantic love. I know I’m not alone in this though, since there’s a bunch of people all over the world like this or experiencing something similar, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. I’ll work on accepting that as time goes on though. 👍
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