If My Fp Saw My Angry Mean Gross Vents And Posts On This Blog I Feel Like Theyd Stop Caring About Me

if my fp saw my angry mean gross vents and posts on this blog i feel like theyd stop caring about me and abandon me because no one cares about the angry person people only care about the sad ones

At some point it feels like I stopped being treated as human with mental illnesses and started being treated like an ordeal that you went through.

I love you strangers in my phone!

I love you Internet numbers!

I love you online validation!

It's funny how I'm sitting here on my bedroom floor crying over you while you're probably just going on about your day perfectly fine.

I'm starting to think you really just don't care.

I think. I'm just. Done trying.

Do whatever you want.

"Why do you vent about your relationship issues so much? Isn't that just selfish??"

I do it because it's been the only thing on my mind for the past several weeks, and I'm tired of pretending like I feel happy about my friendships.

Every time I build a genuine and happy connection to someone, something goes wrong and it always ends up with me no longer being friends with them, either by them cutting me off or me doing it myself to save myself the heartbreak.

At this point, I should cut all of my friends out of my life and die alone, because I know I'm going to lose them too.

It's genuinely so tiring having to think about that all of the time, I mean, I literally landed in the mental hospital after I threatened to kill myself because I felt unloved for Christ sake.

I hate being like this so much. WHY CAN'T I JUST FUCKING HAVE A MEANINGFUL FRIENDSHIP THAT ACTUALLY LASTS???

sighs dramatically . i need more than i have i want more than i am i have so little to give yet am so hungry