My Dream

My dream

Teacher: What do you want to be in the future?

Friend: A doctor

Friend: An astronaut

Friend: To end world hunger

Me: Dead

Teacher: ....

Everyone: ....

Me: ...preferably anytime soon

Can we talk about psych wards for a sec?

Can we talk about how they’re not padded cells and straight jackets like in the movies? That they’re not full of people screaming? That they’re not this cold gray hell? Wanna know what it’s really like?

It’s wearing PJs all day and nobody giving a fuck about what you look like. It’s encouraging your new friends to get better, that they’re life is worth living and that they’re valued. It’s making friends in a day or two. It’s realizing you’ve got more in common with people than you thought. It’s watching stupid movies when the staff decides we can have a little bit of movie time that night before lights out. Talking in group, not about the scary, soulless monsters in our heads but talking about how to conquer them. We laugh. We joke. We draw and play with playdoh. Celebrate when the cafeteria sends muffins with breakfast instead of gross hospital eggs or boring cereal. The mixed feelings when someone leaves because you’ll miss them but we all hug good bye and wish them luck because they’re okay. They’re okay now. We’ll miss them but dear god you’re so proud when you get to see someone walk out with their bag of belongings and their family. We remember what it’s like to live. Sure we meet with doctors and one on one therapists and discuss safety plans, but it’s not a scary thing. Let me tell you this, when I spent 5 days in a ward summer of 2016 I was terrified. I got there and went straight to my room once they assigned me a place, made my bed with the blankets provided, got a book from the Game Room and hid under the covers and read. I think I still was wearing my hospital issued socks. I knew nothing about my roommates, only their names from the notecards above the door. When they came in for lights out they smiled and introduced themselves and asked why I was here. They saw my shocked face because I didn’t expect anyone to ask me “what’s your story?” Just didn’t see it coming. They told me theirs so I told mine. I became friends with everyone else there. They were all so sweet. Probably not what you’d expect to hear about a bunch of suicidal, depressed, anxious, bipolar, etc. kids but hey, we’re not our fucking illnesses. We all went through hell and we all walked out again, maybe with scars and bad memories, but we came out strong.

We’re just kids. We complained about the food and made each other cheesy motivational posters for their rooms when they got discharged. We painted each other’s nails and reminded everyone of their strengths. We talked about what we’d do once we were home, the unanimous decision was to shower and finally shave our legs since there were no razors allowed on our ward, and eat some real food and go on Tumblr or Instagram or something.

We’re just kids. Honestly, we’re like you. If you find out someone spent time doing inpatient stuff because of their mental illness, don’t you dare judge them for it. Don’t think they’re crazy or psycho. That’s not what we are. What we are are kids who needed to go away for a bit and escape the world in a safe environment. Where people got it. Where they understood. Where we couldn’t hurt ourselves and got a fighting chance to recover.

Destroy the stigma around inpatient treatment. Change the mindset surrounding mental illness.

Keep fighting folks

Remember when you were picked for teams as a child, and there was always that last child who would be staring at the floor knowing they were going to be last?

That child knew the pain that came from humiliation and loneliness better than they ever should have. Remember that child who spent every lunch time alone in a bathroom stall, or completely changing who they were, to feel accepted into any group they could find?

That child grew up thinking it was normal to be whispered about all day, normal to be pushed into lockers, and normal for people to never be able to love them, and accept them for the way they were.

That child spent the rest of their life trying to heal others, trying to give them love.

And all it did, was leave them empty.

That child was me, and still is. I am now the adult with a broken heart, the adult unsure of finding someone who will love them again. When you have lived your entire life being told you are not good enough, you start to believe it. When you are always that friend willing to go above and beyond for your friend’s happiness, yet they could not care less about you when you are down, you start to believe that’s normal. That child was me, that child will always be me, and I will always have a heart too big for those that don’t deserve it.

Fuyumi: *humming happily as she makes dinner*

Endeavour: What are you so happy about?

Fuyumi: *smiles* Because tomorrow is Christmas!

Endeavour: *frowns* Christmas comes every year, and I have never seen you this excited about it.

Fuyumi: This year is special though. Shoto bought us all presents!

Endeavour:

Endeavour: All of us as in...?

Fuyumi: *huffs* Yes, he bought one for you too.

Endeavour: *suddenly excited* Really?! Are you certain?

Fuyumi: *shrugs* I saw him wrap 3 boxes, so it's safe to assume he got you something as well-

Endeavour: *stands up from the table and rushes down the hall*

Fuyumi: *startled* W-Where are you going?

Endeavour: *runs into his room* To bed so Christmas will come faster!

Fuyumi:

-

*Christmas Day*

Natsuo: *wearing an elf hat* Merry Christmas!

Fuyumi: *bringing in a tray of hot coco* Merry Christmas!

Endeavour: *trying not to bounce up and down excitedly* Merry Christmas.

Todoroki: *gets up and grabs 3 boxes from under the tree*

Todoroki: *hands one to Natsuo* For nii-san.

Natsuo: *grins and ruffles his hair* Thanks, Sho!

Todoroki: *hands one to Fuyumi* For you, nee-san.

Fuyumi: *smiles* Thank you, Shoto.

Todoroki: *nods* *looks over at Endeavour before turning away and sitting on the couch*

Endeavour: *frowns* What about the last gift?

Todoroki: *blinks slowly* ...This is for my father.

Endeavour: *excited* Oh, Shoto! I'm so ha-!

*ding dong*

Fuyumi: Oh! He's here! *gets up to open the door*

Aizawa: *walks through the door* Merry Christmas.

Endeavour: *crosses his arms* What are you doing here-?

Todoroki: *gets up and hands Aizawa the last box* Merry Christmas, father.

Endeavour: *jaw drops* W...WHAT?!

Aizawa: *pats his head* Thank you, Shoto. *reaches into his jacket and pulls out 4 small boxes* I have gifts for you three as well.

Todoroki: *takes his with a small smile* Thank you.

Natsuo: *takes his and gives Aizawa a hug* Thanks, pops!

Fuyumi: *smiles* Thank you, father!

Endeavour:

Endeavour: Why are there four boxes-?

*door suddenly opens*

Dabi: *casually walks in and grabs a cup of coco* Merry Christmas. Am I late?

Aizawa: *hands him the last box* Just on time actually. Now that you're all here, let's go back home to celebrate.

Natsuo: *jumps up* Hell yeah! It was so boring over here! Let's go! *rushes out the door*

Fuyumi: *grabs her coat* Did you need help cooking dinner?

Aizawa: *shakes head* Hizashi helped me with it. He's excited to finally meet you all. *looks to Todoroki* Are you ready?

Todoroki: *searching behind the tree* Almost. I have one more gift to give. *pulls out a box*

Endeavour: *perks up hopefully* Is...Is that for...?

Todoroki: *nods*

Endeavour: *excited*

Todoroki: *turns and hands it to Dabi* Merry Christmas, nii-san.

Dabi: *ruffles his hair* Thanks, kid. *slings an arm over his shoulder* Now let's go celebrate.

Aizawa: *turns to Endeavour* Oh, I almost forgot. I stopped by the hospital. Rei wanted me to give you this.

Aizawa: *hands him a small box* Have a good Christmas, Endeavour. *closes the door behind him*

Endeavour:

Endeavour: *looks down at the small box*

Endeavour: *slowly and oh so carefully unwraps it*

Endeavour: *turns the box over*

*a small piece of coal falls into his hand*

Endeavour:

Endeavour:

“Those poor boys”

“She deserves to be punished too.”

“I’m not saying I support rape, but-”

“Sorry to say - she deserved it.”

“She put herself in harm’s way”

“But if she was fingered, then that’s not rape.”

“She ruined their lives.”

PLEASE READ. WILL NOT HURT TO AND FORWARD. Kids are putting Drano, tin foil, and a little water in plastic drink bottles and capping it up - leaving it on lawns, in mail boxes, in gardens, on driveways etc. just waiting for you to pick it up intending to put it in the rubbish, but you’ll never make it!!!

If the bottle is picked up, and the bottle is shaken even just a little - in about 30 seconds or less it builds up enough gas which then explodes with enough force to remove some your extremities. The liquid that comes out is boiling hot as well. Don’t pick up any plastic bottles that may be lying in your yards or in the gutter, etc. Pay attention to this. A plastic bottle with a cap. A little Drano. A little water. A small piece of foil. Disturb it by moving it; and BOOM!! No fingers left and other serious effects to your face, eyes, etc. Please ensure that everyone that may not have email access are also informed of this. 

Snopes confirms.