Alex: Whats He Doing Here?

Alex: What’s he doing here?

Pietro: Hello.

Scott: He lives here.

Alex: You live with Pietro?

Scott: Part of what I wanted to talk about-

Alex: You’re gay.

Scott: I’m not gay!

Alex: Does your girlfriend know?

Scott: I don’t have a girlfriend?

Alex: Well, I guess now we know why.

Luna: *wakes up and starts gurgling in Pietro’s arms*

Alex: And you have a baby.

Scott: She’s not my baby!

Pietro: She is my baby.

Alex: Scott, the least you could do is adopt your gay lover’s baby. I thought Hank and I raised you right.

Just imagine the comedic value of Dick Joke^2. You either have a) a couple that Agatha separated during the illusion and Jack jokes about Ralph cheating until the end of time or b) Wanda casts two strangers as the married couple of Pietro and Scott Maximoff. After she takes down the hex they just kind of shrug and stay married. Pick your poison.

is it possible for me to push ronica to be a popular ship without ever putting effort into writing anything for it just for the sake of the name? because I hate it

Peter: I’m Pietro, but I go by Peter.

Jubilee: I’m Jubilee.

Peter: So…

Jubilee: My best friend is really cute.

Peter: MOOD.

Jubilee: I want to marry Jean!

Peter: I want to have Scott’s children!

Jubilee: THAT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE BUT I WANT TO HAVE JEAN’S!!!

Peter: WE’RE GOING TO BE BEST FRIENDS!!!

Jubilee: YES!!!!!!

Jean: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon?

Pietro: I’m a knife.

Scott: He’s a goddamn octopus, just wraps his limbs around me and squeezes like he thinks I’m going to fly away.

I’m not even sure how to respond to this? I’m scared? But I’m also super flattered.

pov I hold Lan gently like hamburger

Villain: We have your Mom.

Kurt: Which one?

Villain: ...what?

Kurt: You heard me.

Villain: Blue skin, yellow eyes, a weird skull thing on her head?

Kurt: Oh, you mean my ren! Yeah, no, you don’t have them. They have you.