I Had Homemade Cherry Ice Cream Today In A Waffle Cone. He Can Shove It.

I had homemade cherry ice cream today in a waffle cone. He can shove it.

In October, he told me that he hoped I never let myself slip into the notion that I deserved to treat myself.

It kinda hit in an instant.

When you finally start getting angry about what happened to you

Fun things

So last night when i was in that fuzzy spot between being awake and being asleep I called out for him.

You have a beautiful soul!

I think we are trained to see the worst in ourselves, so I can only hope that is true.  Thank you for being so generous and taking the time to message me.  Some days are worse than others and today was difficult.  Seeing your message made it a little brighter. Kindness never ceases to overwhelm me :)   Keep being wonderful.

Nothing spoils a day without anxiety quite like a speeding ticket.

I have received far too many positive, sweet messages recently and I am compelled to remind you all that I am far from blameless. 

Full disclosure.

I cheated. Yes, I’m one of those horrible people.

And not just once. It was systematic. It spanned years, and with multiple people. I was trying to heal myself, give myself a moment of reprieve, find that light heartedness that makes life manageable.

What it actually did was cause further destruction to my self worth. And I handed him a weapon and an excuse that he used to torture me further for another two years.

My actions are inexcusable. I have no one to blame for them but myself. I have been wrought at the idea that I have inflicted pain. It is done and cannot be undone. I can only be better moving forward.