Arthur: Really, Morgana? Merlin? Is This Wise?

Arthur: Really, Morgana? Merlin? Is this wise?

Morgana: I know, but you don't have a choice.

Arthur: You really want me to rely on Merlin, Merlin, to ride out and escort a princess, a princess, all the way from Escetir to Camelot on horseback, on horseback, so I can ask her to be my queen?

Merlin: Why shouldn't I?

Arthur: Because, Merlin, you're an idiot. You'll probably get lost or scare her off before you can even cross the border.

Morgana: That's what I'm counting on.

*Merlin and Morgana watch Gwaine grab the front of his trousers in an attempt to look cool*

Morgana: Does...does Gwaine have problems with his genitals?

Merlin: Yes.

Merlin: He's thinking with them.

why not save time with all these “sports” by making them all play at the same time on the same pitch?

i call it the Fuckening and it’s the biggest event on the calendar

Gaius: Merlin, when you meet the king, do not look at him directly.

Merlin: Are you sure you're not confusing him with the sun?

Merlin: ...

Merlin: Is it entirely out of the bounds of possibility, that you have an ulterior motive for making me do this?

Kilgharrah: What?! How could you think that of me!!! I'd hoped you'd know me better than that!

Merlin: You're right. I'm sorry, I-

Kilgharrah: At any given moment I never have fewer than seven ulterior motives at play.

Merlin: Alright, this has gone on long enough. Let's settle it right here and right now.

Merlin: Show of hands, who here thinks I'm dating Arthur?

Merlin:

Merlin: Arthur put your hand down.