Sex Ed - Tumblr Posts - Page 2

I am a firm believer that consent education starting from a young age could directly lessen the amounts of rapes and sexual assaults.

We teach people not to rape. At least we say we do… We say “don’t rape” and then the media tells them that a rapist is a scary man jumping from the bushes.

We don’t teach people to get consent. That consent isn’t the absence of a no but the presence of an enthusiastic and informed yes.

You can ask someone if they raped someone and they’ll say no. But ask them if they got consent? They also will say no.

And it’s the same damn thing.

Awesome risk charts from Smart Sex Resource

Many std/stis are easily treatable and some are asymptomatic, so have your health check often.

Please keep your safety in mind always <3

No snark, no smart assery, no douchebaggery today, just making sure you all know condoms are one time use only cuz this was a scary headline.

When I was 17 my appendix ruptured because I thought I was just having period cramps and didn’t go to the hospital so don’t tell me PMS symptoms are no big deal

This won’t make your blog look ugly. How could you not reblog this? REBLOGGING THIS COULD SAVE A LIFE!!!

Anyone saying "consent ruins the moment" CLEARLY has no sense of what's hot

I will die on this hill

especially if you have a dom who's nervous about hurting you or pushing you too far!!!! this is so important!

For the love of god, praise and reassure your Dom after sex. I cannot tell you the amount of times I’ve told a Dom they did a good job after sex and they’re like “???? Why are you saying that???” It’s INSANE. Aftercare goes both ways! Praise! Your! Dom! Tell them the specific things you liked! Tell them how hot they were! Tell them that you appreciate them taking control! It goes such a long way, trust me.

are certain lubes better suited for vaginal or anal sex? or are they all the same?

hi anon,

water-based, oil-based, and silicone-based lube are all suitable for either vaginal or anal sex. many people prefer silicone-based lubricants for anal sex because it's so long-lasting and durable, which is helpful when you're working with an orifice that won't naturally lubricate itself. oil-based lubricants are also a no-go with latex condoms, which is relevant for both vaginal and anal sex. beyond that it's all a matter of personal preference!

Sex stuff you probably won’t learn from fanfiction and/or porn:

Erotic fic and porn can be a lot of fun! But if you aren’t being provided with adequate sex ed through other channels (comprehensive sexual education, frank and open discussions with trusted adults, etc.), turning to fanfic and porn for your understanding of sex is gonna leave some major blindspots and may leave you with some unrealistic expectations. While there’s nothing wrong with these kinds of erotica, they are fictional and tend to leave out a lot of the more realistic, human parts of sex - they serve a great purpose, but that purpose isn’t primarily educational. The following is an incomplete list of some things you should probably know about sex that a lot of fic and porn tends to leave out:

It isn’t always super hot or super sweet. Sometimes it’s super silly. Or sometimes it’s sort of mundane and you’re both simply scratching an itch. That’s fine too. (Hell, sometimes you’re talking about comic books while boning and your partner is laughing that you’re getting REALLY ANGRY about spider-man while they’re going to town on you.)

You will probably not climax at the same moment. It’s a sweet idea, but extremely hard to coordinate, and if all your concentration is going into coming at the exact same moment, you’re probably not enjoying yourselves as much as you might. 

Sometimes bodies make weird, goofy noises. Squelching, slapping, air-escaping, un-sexy noises. It’s okay to laugh at this. 

Hell, it’s okay to laugh during sex in general.

Sometimes you fart. Sometimes you fart while someone is going down on you and it is embarrassing as hell. This isn’t the end of the world. Embarrassing body things happen. Heck, sometimes, with anal, there’s a little poo. You get over it.

Sometimes sex is… kinda bad? This doesn’t mean it’s assault, or something traumatic – sometimes it’s consensual but just kinda bleh and not what you hoped for. The best thing to do (if you’re talking about sex with a partner and not just a hook up who you can not call back) is talk to them about it. Figure out what went wrong, what you enjoy and what you don’t, and communicate what techniques you do and don’t like. Also don’t be afraid to stop someone in the middle of the sex act you’re not enjoying and offer guidance on how to help make it good for you too. (Side tip: masturbation makes great research into what you personally do and don’t enjoy sexually)

You won’t enjoy every sex act. Not every body is wired to find every thing pleasurable. You might find anal does nothing for you. You may find g-spot stimulation just makes you really anxious that you’re about to pee. You may not enjoy giving or receiving oral. You’re not broken if you don’t like something that every pornstar or smutty fanfic protagonist seems to have earth-shattering orgasms from. Everyone’s got nerve endings in a range of places – it’s quite literally, different strokes for different folks.

On that note, not all orgasms are earth-shattering. Sometimes it just feels warm and nice. That’s fine too. 

Sometimes, if you’re neutral on a sex act and your partner loves it, you can suck it up for them, and they’ll suck up something they’re not crazy about for your pleasure in return. But communicate preferences with each other! Know that when a partner does that thing you love that they don’t get much from, that it’s an act of care, and vice versa. 

Falling asleep in each other’s arms right after wild passionate sex seems really romantic, but dried and crusty fluids are gonna be a bitch in the morning. Also, after sex, you should both (regardless of your equipment) go pee to clear out the urethra of any gunk or bacteria to reduce risk of a UTI. 

Putting a towel down on the bed before sex means you don’t have to sleep on wet funky sheets. (it’s also verrrrrry useful for period sex if you or your partner menstruate.)

A lot of people don’t like dirty talk, or rough sex. Always ask first. (Fanfic on the whole does a better job than porn at showing communication, but a lot of it is still highly fictive on this point)

PROTECTION PROTECTION PROTECTION. Use condoms, dental dams, etc. not just to prevent pregnancy, but to reduce risk of STIs. (Yes, even couples with the same genitals who don’t need to worry about pregnancy).

Lube is great and very important, but random goopy things around you are not good lube. Random oils especially, since oil doesn’t flush out well and can trap bacteria inside the body – oil-based lubricant also degrades condoms. Use lube specifically designed for intimate purposes. Water-based and silicone-based lubes help sex feel really good!

Bigger isn’t necessarily better. A lot of people with vaginas don’t enjoy the feeling of being repeatedly punched in the cervix by a monster cock. Some people enjoy a larger size when being penetrated by an appendage or toy and some don’t.

Bodies are hairy. Genitals are hairy. You may get a pube stuck in your teeth at some point. If your partner is WAY fuzzier than porn ever led you to believe they’d be, well, that’s normal. 

Not everyone loves the taste of ejaculate. Sometimes it’s nasty (flavor tends to vary from person to person depending on their diet, but sometimes you just really don’t like it no matter what. Some of us hate the taste of peanut butter. People don’t always like things). It’s okay not to swallow, or to request a penis-having partner warn you so they don’t ejaculate in your mouth (in fact, it’s polite for them to do the latter). 

If you’re gonna have shower sex, get one of those rubbery mats for the shower floor that gives you traction, because otherwise it’s super embarrassing to call for an ambulance while dripping wet and naked because you slipped and accidentally broke something and your partner got a concussion while you were trying to bang in the shower. 

Moaning and screaming wildly during sex is fun but it will make the neighbors in the apartments adjacent to you hate you. Make choices accordingly. 

Since they don’t teach gay sex ed in school let me tell gay guys and anyone else that wants to use the back door that douching is bad for you. It will cause long term problems.

Also starving yourself all day will not work because sometimes it can take up to two or three days for something to move through you.

Just eat a bunch of fiber and use the bathroom at least an hour or two before your booty call if you can. If you hate eating fiber just get yourself some fiber pills to take with meals. If you eat enough fiber the section after the colon should remain relatively clean on its own. Just wash the outside part. Not your insides. Those clean themselves.

Also if he shames you for anything that happens by accident in the bedroom and/or refuses to use a condom he’s a jerk-wad and an idiot and you should dump him.

Something I agree with and have seen stated again and again is that you need to respect boundaries before you can push them.

We cannot maintain healthy sexual relationships if you blur the line of what's okay and what's not too much, respecting boundaries that were previously talked about and agreed on is So important at the beginning of a sexual relationship. It's very fun to push the limits and force out orgasm after orgasm, it's very fun to do cnc play and very fun to do knife play However! It's So important to communicate boundaries and set limits.

Trust me, cnc, bondage, bdsm, knife play all sounds very enticing until you start to feel unsafe or start to panic. You need to Trust and be able to ensure your safety in your play partner.

Some of y'all are rushing out here and it's okay to take your time, it's Necessary to take your time to make your play partners feel Good, Safe, and Happy with heavy-kink scenes

This won’t make your blog look ugly. How could you not reblog this? REBLOGGING THIS COULD SAVE A LIFE!!!

This won’t make your blog look ugly. How could you not reblog this? REBLOGGING THIS COULD SAVE A LIFE!!!

This is so stupid to say aloud but when I was really into Destiny 2 I would have like. A week-long semi depressive state after every new update dropped because I spent so much time (at least a month) anticipating it and I just couldn’t stop from crashing hard. It was weird and uncomfy and it consistently made me doubt whether I even enjoyed the game or just the idea of waiting for it.

Now while the question of “Does anyone actually enjoy Destiny 2” is decidedly up in the air (/j) I think for other things, in the context of sex or socializing for example, it’s important to be aware of the possibility of crashing during or after them so you DON’T spiral about this thing that was “supposed to make you happy” actually feeling shitty. Because it did make you happy! But you’re allowed to crash too, and that doesn’t mean you were silly or dumb for looking so forward to it.

People in the BDSM and kink communities are the only people who are normal about sex, actually, and we should all learn from them.

I think everyone should familiarise themselves with the theory for such key concepts as consent, rejecting a sexual practice for yourself without judging it morally for others, sub drop and how it can happen even in the most vanilla sexual encounters, and aftercare and how it’s often needed in even the most vanilla sexual encounters (but often treated as a joke and something to ridicule).

This won’t make your blog look ugly. How could you not reblog this? REBLOGGING THIS COULD SAVE A LIFE!!!

#Friends: “Carnal Knowledge” by Elizabeth Renstrom and Zöe Ligon

These two amazing ladies who I am honored to call my friends made a book. Something I truly wish I had as a resource when I am younger. Would’ve made a lot of things less scary...

Get one now (or from your local bookstores!)