Something I Agree With And Have Seen Stated Again And Again Is That You Need To Respect Boundaries Before

Something I agree with and have seen stated again and again is that you need to respect boundaries before you can push them.

We cannot maintain healthy sexual relationships if you blur the line of what's okay and what's not too much, respecting boundaries that were previously talked about and agreed on is So important at the beginning of a sexual relationship. It's very fun to push the limits and force out orgasm after orgasm, it's very fun to do cnc play and very fun to do knife play However! It's So important to communicate boundaries and set limits.

Trust me, cnc, bondage, bdsm, knife play all sounds very enticing until you start to feel unsafe or start to panic. You need to Trust and be able to ensure your safety in your play partner.

Some of y'all are rushing out here and it's okay to take your time, it's Necessary to take your time to make your play partners feel Good, Safe, and Happy with heavy-kink scenes

Things to Say to Someone in Top Drop/Dom Drop

I’m okay

I love you

Thank you

It’s alright

I’m not hurt

I’m not hurt too badly

You’re lovely/wonderful/kind

I enjoyed it

It was worth it

Take your time

Do you need anything?

Do you want a cuddle?

Do you want me to get dressed/take the collar off/put the crop away?

Do you want to talk about it?

I’m here

You’re not a bad person

Top drop/dom drop usually comes from shock, guilt or insecurity about the way you have just treated someone whose well-being you care about very much. Like sub drop, it is usually accompanied by a fall in endorphins and general energy levels. Especially for aces (who I find have a greater need to be in the right mindset/’zone’ for play and intimacy), a ‘snap’ moment where you break out of play mode can throw you emotionally, and the end of play causes a similar reassessment or double-take at what happened during the scene.

Dominants in drop require the same kind of care as subs, but a different kind of reassurance.

Using any kind of anti-biotic ointment is good for just about any surface cuts, burns, bruising or anything else but you can also use other ointments and creams that are more specified to the play your doing. I've just noticed anti-biotic creams heal up cuts, burns, bruising and rashes really well.

I use triple anti-biotic ointment but I'm not entirely sure if it's actually tripple or it's just advertising to get you to buy it. Either way, I think it makes a difference. I did have to go on a adventure with my ex partner and we tried a few different ointments because he didn't like the feel of anti-biotic ointment so if you guys want to know about those I can talk for forever about it

Hey, just for the general public.

There's like emotional aftercare right and most people who do aftercare- this is what they think about right?

Emotional aftercare is extremely important but you Need to make sure your partner is physically taken care of afterwards as well!

I see a lot of doms talking about aftercare but not mentioning anything more than a shower of Bagh as far as taking care of their partner physically afterwards.

You need to make sure they go pee right after a scene!

For impact play if they're bruising, inflamed, or raw afterwards put ointment on it Before you put lotion on it. If their skin's just a bit red it's okay to just put lotion on.

For bondage, you need to make sure you put ointment on rope burns and massage out the joints and muscles that have been trapped in place for the past hour.

Sometimes your partner is too drained for a shower in which it's Your job to clean them up! Get a damp warm wash cloth and make sure their all clean.

If your partner has a chronic illness you need to make sure their getting the right care for that afterwards!

The point is, take care of your partner after a scene

Hey, just for the general public.

There's like emotional aftercare right and most people who do aftercare- this is what they think about right?

Emotional aftercare is extremely important but you Need to make sure your partner is physically taken care of afterwards as well!

I see a lot of doms talking about aftercare but not mentioning anything more than a shower or bath as far as taking care of their partner physically afterwards.

You need to make sure they go pee right after a scene!

For impact play if they're bruising, inflamed, or raw afterwards put ointment on it Before you put lotion on it. If their skin's just a bit red it's okay to just put lotion on.

For bondage, you need to make sure you put ointment on rope burns and massage out the joints and muscles that have been trapped in place for the past hour.

Sometimes your partner is too drained for a shower in which it's Your job to clean them up! Get a damp warm wash cloth and make sure their all clean.

If your partner has a chronic illness you need to make sure their getting the right care for that afterwards!

The point is, take care of your partner after a scene

“what if kids identify with something and it ends up just being a phase-?” good. stop teaching and expecting kids (and adults honestly) to formulate permanent traits and ideas of themselves. everything in life is a phase. that doesn’t make it any less legitimate while you experience it. let people explore themselves and know it’s okay if what you think about yourself changes.