Otto Von Bearto - Tumblr Posts

Incorrect Quotes Generator Shenanigans: Part 17

Mikey: Today, Leo took my phone, and in five minutes, they sent high resolution close-up photos of Casey II to the following people: Raph, Donnie, April, the neighbors, the bank, my accountant, San Diego Blood Bank, and Shake Shack's text bot.

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Cassandra: Ask me anything. Go ahead, I'll give you a straight answer. Sunita: Why are we so fucking awesome? Cassandra: That's the best fucking question anybody's ever asked.

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Draxum: Sometimes I like to place my hands on someone’s cheeks, look into their eyes... Draxum: ...And violently jerk their head until it snaps. Muninn: ...That took an unexpected turn. Huginn: So did their neck.

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Warren: Which country has the most birds? Warren: Portu-geese! Meat Sweats: That's a language. Warren: Portu-gull? Meat Sweats: Good recovery. Repo: I think you mean good re-dovery. Hypno: TURKEY. HOW DID WE MISS TURKEY?

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Otto von Bearto: Problem, I can't tell if this food is over-sauced or undercooked. Bayou 'Bearto: Solution, just pop it back in the oven for another 10 minutes. There's at least a 50% chance that'll fix it, right? Albearto: Result? Food has somehow become unpleasantly soggy and unpleasantly crunchy at the exact same time. Chef Albéar: No better time than this to pull out my favorite word! Slunchy! Al-beardo: ...put it away.

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Baxter on Monday: *glues a dime to the sidewalk* Heh heh heh. Baxter on Wednesday: *walking down the street* Ooh hey! A dime!

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Big Mama: You are irrationally angry 365 days a year. Draxum: Well, that’s just your personal opinion, I don’t have anger issues. Do you guys think I have anger issues? Splinter: Well, I wouldn’t really call it an issue. An issue is something you can fix.