Morbid Humor - Tumblr Posts

orbitalshards

1 year ago

Someone asked me about my retirement plan. I'm in my mid-30s, and when I answered "a bottle of vodka and a tall bridge," they laughed. I did not.

Tags :

morbid humor funny suicide millenials mental health dystopian capitalist hell

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match-your-steps

4 years ago

So today I went to the grocery store before work because I needed some stuff. I got to work early, so naturally I decided to eat the chocolate I bought. I then had the thought, 'oh, didn't I buy something else? maybe I'll eat that instead'

The other thing

it

it was batteries

so, uh, anyways, anyone up for another round of electrocution?

Tags :

electrocution tw morbid humor minor morbidity no I did not actually eat them I need those for my graphing calculator thanks I keep forgetting to take the batteries out over the summer food cw

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butlerapologist

3 years ago

I might consider having My father cremated if I can turn him into a necklace and make the most morbid joke ever if my future partner ever asks to meet my parents. That would be HILARIOUS!!!!

Tags :

deadbeat dad dead dad club dead dad jokes morbid humor

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