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One of my favorite stories!

To help a deer friend

Summary: After the events of the last extermination, everyday life slowly returns to the Hazbin Hotel. Only one of them has behaved strangely since the latest extermination. Alastor retreats more and more into his room and Charlie wants to know what's wrong with the Radio Demon and decides to bring light into the dark… (I suck so hard at writing summaries. I am so sorry)

Warnings: This story contains innocent, fluffy tickling near the end, so if you don't like this, then please don't read this, thank you. Also a little OOC warning here. I always try to stay in character while writing, but I can't make promises that it stays that way during the story. And since I am NOT a shipper, this is pure platonic fluff ;)

Word count: 5500

Authors note: My first Hazbin Hotel Fanfiction and also the first FF which I have written in almost 2 years of having a very bad writer's block due to my ongoing depression and grief. I am a little rusty, so please don't expect too much. I also translated this from german into english, so please don't expect perfect writing here, thank you^^. I had this idea stuck in my head for almost two weeks and a few days ago I finally found enough motivation to write it down and this is what came out (you can also find this fic on my Fanfiction.net account). Maybe someone likes this :3. And now have fun reading it.

Update: Sequel can be found here

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Silence.

Something that now felt unfamiliar to Charlie after everything that had happened. Too much had happened in the past few months. The negotiations with Adam, then with Heaven, all the defeats those negotiations had brought...all of it had frayed her nerves like nothing else and then it had come to the big bang, in which she had lost not only the hotel but also a good friend.

Charlie just hoped that Sir Pentious was in a better place now, even though she knew that was unlikely, because no one, not even the angels, seemed to know what happened after the death of a human soul. No matter whether it was a human soul in the form of a demon or an angel.

Not only had a portrait been created in honor of the serpent demon, but her father had also built the hotel in such a way that, on closer inspection, it reminded her a little of Sir Pentious and the Princess of Hell appreciated that gesture very much.

A lot had changed now, especially since her father had moved into the hotel.

Charlie couldn't help but roll her eyes, when she thought about how childish he had been acting since then. But that wasn't even the worst of it, because Alastor, the Radio Demon everyone in hell feared, had also been behaving very differently since then. It was as if he had found a new rival and it seemed as if he wanted to turn said new rival’s life into literal hell. The two of them were worse than little children and their behavior was beginning to pull on Charlie's nerves.

As she made her way into the empty lobby, she paused for a moment and listened into the silence of the hotel.

Vaggie, Husker, Angel, even Niffty, had all flown out today. Only Charlie herself, her father and Alastor were still in the hotel. But she hadn't seen or heard anything from either of them today and it was starting to unsettle her. The two of them were usually fighting against one another every day, but now they were so quiet all of a sudden? Something was definitely not right today!

When Charlie thought about it, she had noticed that Alastor had been retreating to his room more and more lately. Lucifer couldn’t be the reason for that, because whenever her father was around, Alastor couldn't help but play tricks on him, before disappearing again. But there were always moments when Charlie noticed that something seemed to be wrong with Alastor. She had often noticed how he withdrew from them all and it seemed to her that his face was contorted in pain. Although he constantly wore that big grin on his face, Charlie knew it was just a mask he put on every day to hide his true feelings from all of them. But the young princess had noticed lately that this mask was slowly but surely cracking and Alastor seemed to have noticed this too, because that would also explain why he had been making himself so scarce lately...

A startled squeak escaped her throat, as two arms suddenly wrapped around her upper body, abruptly snapping her out of her thoughts and before she knew what was happening, her back got pressed against a warm chest that vibrated slightly as her "attacker" laughed in amusement.

"Did I scare you, my little apple?" Lucifer's voice purred teasingly into her ear, causing her to giggle and playfully trying to free herself from his surprisingly strong grip.

"Dad, let go of me," she giggled and she could literally feel her father's broad grin in the back of her neck.

"Already? Oh, come on, Charlie~. It's been so long since I've been able to hold my little duckling in my arms. Why don't you give me a few minutes to enjoy this rare moment~?."

The words were followed by three pairs of enormous, beautiful wings, which also gently wrapped themselves around Charlie and before the young princess knew it, she was already laughing and squirming slightly in the arms of the King of Hell, as he gently moved his wings up and down to tickle her teasingly with his feathers.

She couldn't remember how often he had done this when she was still a child, but now, at this moment, lying in his arms and laughing more carefree than she had for a long time, she realized how much she had missed her father. Their bond had become even stronger since the day of the extinction. He had saved her when Adam had wanted to kill her and in the end it had been Charlie herself who had had to stop her father from killing Adam. She had never seen him so out of control as on that day and she still shuddered when she remembered the look of pure bloodlust in his red sparkling eyes that day. It should have scared her, but it hadn't. He had done it to protect her and show her how much he loved her.

Another squeak escaped her, as she was whirled around and in the next moment, she was greeted by Lucifer's broadly grinning face. His wings disappeared, but his arms stayed where they were and her father pulled her lovingly against his body, wrapping his arms around her, as if he feared someone might take her away from him. Her eyes closed, as she too wrapped her arms around him and returned the warm embrace, snuggling up to him.

The two of them remained in this position and no one spoke a word, just enjoying the moment of silence and peace. The moment couldn’t have been more perfect. A hand gently brushed through her hair and she pressed herself a little closer against her father.

"I've missed this so much..." he whispered softly into her ear and she could only nod in response.

"Thank you for staying, Dad. That means a lot to me. And thank you for saving my hotel,” she whispered back to him.

"You are most welcome, little apple."

Father and daughter reluctantly separated from each other, as they both knew that they couldn't stay in this position forever. And after all, Charlie still had work to do.

"Dad, can I ask you something?"

"Of course you can. Go ahead and ask."

"Have you seen Alastor today, by any chance?"

It was enough just to mention his name and Charlie could see her father's face grimace as he sat down on one of the sofas in the lobby.

"Fortunately not," was the king's short reply and Charlie had to suppress an eye roll.

"Bambi's probably in his room, crying into his pillow, because he lost our last battle. Your janitor hasn't exactly been at his best lately..."

It looked like Charlie wasn't the only one who had noticed that Alastor had been acting strange lately.

"That's what I want to talk to you about," she said and she took a seat next to Lucifer, who raised an eyebrow at her and gave her a skeptical look.

"You want to talk to me about Bambi?"

"Oh, come on, Dad. Stop calling him that. Why don't you two just get along?"

A mocking laugh escaped from the King’s throat.

"Nope, never gonna happen."

His lips curled into a wide grin that showed all his fangs.

"It's far too much fun to mess with this prick. But...what did you want to know from me, my little apple?"

"Actually, I just wanted to know if you knew where Alastor might be."

"I already told you: Bambi has probably locked himself up in his room and is crying into his pillow. I think he's finally realized that I'm the better of the two of us."

Charlie only had another eye roll left for her father, as she stood up again and left the lobby.

Gosh, why was he acting so damn silly sometimes? King of hell…of course…

"Where are you going?"

"To Alastor. I want to see for myself what's wrong with him. And Dad, at least leave him alone today, will you?"

The fallen angel gave her another big grin and the mischief sparkled in his eyes.

"I can't make any promises that I can't keep in the end, you know?"

"Dad!"

"Okay, okay. Fiiiiiine. I promise you that I'll give the old stag a day's rest today. I've got to go out anyway. I promised Vaggie I'd help her with the last few errands for the hotel. Are you happy with that?"

"Yes, and hopefully you'll stick to your promise," the young princess grumbled and she didn't even wait for his answer, as she left the lobby.

She tried to ignore the amused laughter that echoed after her...

It wasn't long before she was standing in front of the door that led to Alastor's room, but she paused, as she raised her hand to knock. Should she really do that? Or should she just leave the Radio Demon alone? He would certainly have his reasons for staying away from everyone else lately. But these thoughts alone went against Charlie's nature. Alastor was a resident of the Hazbin Hotel, had become a good friend who had fought bravely for them all. To abandon him now went against everything Charlie believed in. So in the end, she raised her hand and knocked gently on the door.

"Al? Are you in there?"

From the other side of the door, she heard a soft noise that sounded as if someone was dragging themselves heavily to the door and indeed, it opened a crack and Alastor carefully peeked out at her.

"Charlie, my dear. What gives me the honor?"

He grinned broadly at her and looked as carefree as ever, but Charlie could see that he was just putting on a mask again and hiding everything else behind it. If she looked closely, she could see the dark bags under his eyes and how tense his body was. It was as if he was struggling to stay on his feet. Something was wrong with him; that was a fact and Charlie wouldn't leave until she knew what was wrong with him.

"Can I come in?" she asked, giving him a friendly smile that she knew would soften his otherwise cold heart just a little. And she was successful again today, because Alastor invited her into his room without further ado and closed the door behind her as soon as she had entered. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him shuffle slowly to his bed and sit down on it, his movements no longer seeming as elegant as usual.

"Why are you here, Charlie?" he asked.

"I just wanted to check on you. You know, I was worried about you, Al."

"Worried? About me? But why is that? There's really no reason to be."

"Really? I and the others have the feeling that you've been avoiding us lately."

A faint hint of radio static briefly filled the air, but it passed as quickly as it had come, as Alastor regained the composure that had briefly slipped from him.

"I'm not avoiding you, my dear. I just want some peace and silence at the moment. A lot has happened..."

"Indeed it has and I don't want to force you into anything either, it's just that we find your behavior a little weird."

"Oh please, Charlie. My behavior is not weirder than usual."

That actually made her giggle a little and she could see his grin widen as well. But when she took a closer look at him, the mirth quickly faded when she noticed the small drops of blood on his coat. They were barely visible on the red fabric, but Charlie could still see them.

"And what about that then?" she immediately asked, pointing her finger at the small stains on his side. Alastor followed her gaze and the sound of radio static filled the air again; louder this time.

"That's nothing..."

"That's blood, Al. Your blood, isn't it? Come on. You can stop the show now. I've been able to see for days that you're not well and that's why you're hiding in your room, isn't it?"

"Now this is just a ridiculous assumption, my dear. I'm doing just fine."

"Oh really? And where is all this blood coming from?"

"Let me put it this way: Not everything went according to plan during my confrontation with Adam. Let's leave it at that, shall we?"

"Leave it at that? Oh no, Al. Radio Demon or not, we're not going to leave it at that. How bad is your injury?"

"Charlie, really, that's not necessary. I'm coping very well, so there's nothing to worry about."

"So you're admitting you've been hurt?"

His prominent grin looked increasingly more forced now, as Charlie seemed to be pressing all the right buttons. Alastor could act all powerful and indifferent, but he had a hard time hiding his pain from her and he knew how stubborn the Princess of Hell could be, once she got something into her head.

In the end, he simply resigned himself to his fate, because he knew that he couldn’t fight against her stubbornness. At least as far as his pride would allow it.

"All right, I admit it: Adam hurt me when we were fighting. But I took care of the wound. It's really nothing to worry about, Charlie."

"Show me your wound."

"I beg your pardon?"

"You heard me."

"That's really not necessary."

The scowl Charlie gave him made him raise an eyebrow and a resigned sigh escaped the depths of his throat, as the princess folded her arms in front of her chest and stared at him, until he finally gave up.

Wordlessly, he took off his coat and began to unbutton his shirt.

A startled gasp filled the air, coming from Charlie, as she saw the extent of his injury. The wound was across his chest and Alastor seemed to have stitched it up himself, as it was half healed but still looked bad. Blood was still sticking to the skin and the wound looked as if it was about to become infected.

"That looks terrible! Why didn't you tell any of us?"

"Because a powerful Overlord like me can handle it quite well on his own. That's why."

"Oh yeah, I can totally see that. This wound looks horrible, Al!"

"Nothing I can't handle, my dear."

The moment those words left his throat, pain ripped through his body like a bolt of lightning, making him gasp and the usually powerful Radio Demon slumped back into his pillows, shutting his eyes close and gritting his teeth so hard it hurt just to watch.

Charlie shuddered, as she had never seen Alastor like this before and she was sure she was the first to see the Deer Demon so weak. And apparently he shared her thoughts, because the next thing she saw was how his eyes turned black and his pupils turned into radio dials. His antlers also grew a little. A clear warning for her and that she should better keep her mouth shut about his condition.

"Calm down, Al. I'm not going to tell anyone about this, so stop with this nonsense."

Only slowly did he relax again. His eyes returned to their original shape and his antlers shrank back to their normal size and another resigned sigh left his throat. And it was the first time in her life that Charlie saw the grin on his face begin to fade and he shamefully turned his head away from her, avoiding eye contact. She knew how prideful he was and she also knew how uncomfortable it must have been for him that she could see him so weak now.

Carefully, she reached her hand out for him and when she touched his shoulder, he flinched hard.

"We all have a bad day, Al. You really don't need to be embarrassed about that. And I promise you I won't tell a single soul about this, okay?"

A weak nod was the only answer she got from him.

"How about I help you with your wound and clean it? And maybe it would be better if we bandaged it, so it doesn't open up again? Only if you allow me to, of course. I know how uncomfortable you are when others touch you."

"It's all right, Charlie. I'll give you permission to do so. But please...make it quick..."

He continued to look away from her, not even looking up when she silently got up from his bed and disappeared briefly into his small bathroom, where she gathered everything she would need in a moment. At that moment, she was also quite glad that they had decided to put a first aid kit in every bathroom of the hotel, just in case of an emergency. She almost grinned at these thoughts, but stopped herself at the last moment. Alastor was in a bad enough situation as it was, so it wasn't appropriate for her to make him feel like she was making fun of him.

When she returned, Alastor was lying comfortably on his bed, eyeing the bowl of water and the washcloth suspiciously, as Charlie placed it on the bedside table and put the bandages next to it, before she sat down next to him.

"It'll probably hurt a bit. I'm afraid I can't avoid that."

"Oh please, as if a ridiculous washcloth could cause me pain."

And again, the young woman felt the urge to roll her eyes. But she said nothing, instead dipping the washcloth into the warm water and then slowly guiding it to its destination. Before she touched his skin, however, she searched his eyes again for his consent, which he gave her with a small nod.

She cleaned the wound very carefully and saw out of the corner of her eye how he turned his face away from her again and how his claws dug into the bedsheets at the same time. So much for the fact that a "ridiculous washcloth" couldn't cause him any pain. His body said something completely different right now. But she ignored this and carried on in silence, as she wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible.

As she carefully washed out his wound, her mind drifted off and she could hardly believe what she was doing here. Just a few months ago, she wouldn't have dared to go near the dreaded Radio Demon and now he was lying here like a little heap of misery and she was tending to the wounds he had sustained from the battle he had fought for this hotel. Her life truly couldn't get any crazier...

She was rudely torn from her thoughts, when the body under her hand jerked violently and she immediately paused in all her movements and concentrated fully on Alastor again, looking at him with concern in her eyes. But he didn't return her gaze, continuing to keep it averted from her, but she could see that his broad grin was back on his face. But it looked different than usual. No longer as forced and if she looked closely, she thought she could see his shoulders trembling slightly, but that could have been her imagination. As he had his eyes still closed, he couldn't see her questioning look and he probably didn't want to, as the whole thing was embarrassing enough for him as it was.

"Al? Is everything all right with you? Did I hurt you?" she asked with a hint of worry in her voice, but he just shook his head silently, keeping his eyes closed and his face turned away from her.

“Are you sure about that?”

A nod was the only answer he gave her.

She watched his face for a few more seconds, before deciding to carry on with her task. She dipped the cloth in the water again, wrung it out and then led it back to the spot she had just worked on. She had already removed the blood from his chest and was now taking care of the smaller bloodstains she could see on his ribcage, but as soon as she touched this area, the body stiffened visibly under her hand. The claws dug into the sheets again and it seemed to her that Alastor was trying really hard to hide his face from her.

"Are you really all right?" she asked, glancing briefly at his face, but again the answer was only a small nod and she began to worry about him. Was his pride really so great that he didn't even want to admit to her that he was in pain?

For hell’s sake! Overlords... they really could be more than exhausting in their behavior...

"Hang in there, Al. I am almost done," she murmured softly and she ran the washcloth over his skin again. Once again the sound of radio static filled the air and at the same time it seemed as if his whole body began to shake. And the longer she ran the washcloth over his ribs, the tighter his arm pressed against his body, until he trapped her hand underneath.

Charlie was already opening her mouth to say something, but the words wouldn't pass her lips when she looked into Alastor's face again. His grin was just about to split his face in half and the initial radio static turned into a soft giggle and then, finally, it made click inside her head and her own lips threatened to twist into a broad grin.

"Oh my. It looks like I've got a rather ticklish patient here, hm?"

She simply couldn't resist teasing him a little, after realization hit her. Just knowing that Alastor, one of the most powerful and feared demons in hell, was ticklish was like pure gold in her eyes. The fact that her teasing words were making him blush was just the cherry on top of the cake and she couldn't help but join in his giggles.

"I-I'm not... ticklish!" he pressed out between clenched teeth and he continued to avoid any eye contact, keeping his eyes closed and pressing his arm even tighter against his body.

"Oh no? You aren’t? Then what's this then?"

She wiggled her fingers as best as she could, grinning as the body beneath her jerked violently again and Alastor tried to turn onto his side. His free hand reached for her arm, his claws closing carefully around her wrist, but he didn't even try to push her hand away from his body, just held it tightly.

Interesting...

"Al?"

There was no answer from him. He just kept turning on his side, slowly turning his back on her, giggling louder and louder as he did so and Charlie noticed that the radio filter he always put over his voice had weakened slightly and revealing parts of his real voice.

Another thing she rarely heard and she had to admit, that his real voice sounded really nice.

"Hey, Al? How about you give me my hand back?"

A shake of the head was the answer she got in response.

"You don't want to?"

Another shake of the head.

"All right, then. I still got a second hand, you know?"

When the fingers of her still free hand touched his ribs as well, it burst out of him like lava from a seething volcano. His laughter sounded so different than usual. It sounded much more carefree, not like a maniac and just...nice? Charlie couldn't describe it any other way. And even though he was still trying to hide his face in his pillow, she could still see enough of it and she liked what she saw. He looked so happy and carefree as he lay there, laughing heartily. She also noticed that he didn't put up much of a fight or try to push her away. He just lay there and laughed. Here and there, his hands grabbed hers when she found a particularly ticklish spot, but she always managed to escape his remarkably light grip and it wasn't long before she felt little tears of laughter in her own eyes. His laughter was contagious and the whole situation was so ridiculous that she couldn't help but laugh along with him.

And if she thought things couldn't get any better, Alastor proved her wrong again when he managed to roll completely onto his side and pulled his legs up to his body in a desperate attempt to protect himself from the sneaky tickle attack, which continued to rain down on him. As Charlie tried to shove her hands under his arms, she noticed movement out of the corner of her eye and when she turned her eyes to Alastor's backside, she couldn't believe what she was seeing and a delightful squeal escaped her throat. Her fingers came to a halt and the otherwise feared Radio Demon took the opportunity to fill his lungs with fresh oxygen again. The faint sound of his giggles was still coming from his throat and he seemed to have blocked out everything around him. At least until he heard Charlie's delighted squeal. His face immediately competed with his coat and he quickly tried to pull his shirt over his now visible deer tail. But it didn't help, because without his coat he couldn't hide it and Charlie had already seen it anyway...

“Ohhh, this is too good, Al. We've already had bets going on whether you have a deer tail or not. It looks so adorable. Please don’t try to hide it from me.”

She heard a muffled growl that Alastor pressed into his pillow, but he didn't look at her, continuing to hide his face. Only his growing antlers showed his resentment. At least until the fingers started wiggling again. The antlers immediately shrank down and a more than loud squeal now left his own throat.

“Now don’t be such a grumpy old stag. I won't tell anyone about this. Promised."

“W-why don’t I belihihihieve you, deahahahar?”

“Wow, now look at that: it can talk after all~.”

“Chahahaharlie pleahahahase…”

"Please what? Please go on? With the greatest pleasure~.”

The body beneath her was now convulsing with laughter, as she tried to attack his stomach with one hand. The other one was still stuck under his arm and it didn't take long before she was literally tickling the tears from his eyes. But not once did he beg her to stop. He just lay there and let it happen, even though he could have gotten out of the situation at any time. But apparently he didn't want this at all...

And she was laughing herself at this funny situation and it didn't get any better when she saw how his tail started wagging. This was by far the funniest sight she had ever seen down here in Hell.

At that moment she was also glad that her father was no longer in the hotel, because he had to be with her girlfriend Vaggie by now. It's hard to imagine what kind of uproar there would be in the hotel if her father, of all people, found out that Alastor was ticklish and had a deer tail. It wouldn't be long before the whole hotel knew. She knew her father well enough and knew that he would take advantage of any opportunity to bully Alastor.

Well, it was also a good thing that Alastor didn't know that even the great King of Hell wasn't immune to tickling himself...

She was startled out of her thoughts, when Alastor started hitting his hand against the mattress over and over again.

"Chahaharlie...d-dear...p-pleahahahase...enough!"

She immediately let go of him and scooted away from him a little to give him enough space to turn back onto his back and stretch his legs out.

“I am so sorry, Al. I didn’t want to overdo it.”

She looked at him apologetically, as he wiped a few tears from his eyes, before directing them back at her. His cheeks were still slightly flushed, which wasn't just due to the tickle attack, but Charlie didn't say anything about it so as not to embarrass him any further.

“I-it’s okay. But please…tell me you’re finally done with tending my wound.”

She couldn't help but giggle as she listened to his voice. He tried to let his radio filter flow back into his voice again and failed miserably at that. She could actually be proud of herself, because not everyone could claim to have defeated a powerful Overlord of hell and then it was the feared Radio Demon himself that she had defeated.

"I just have to put the bandage on and you're done," she answered his question and her lips curled into a small grin again when he growled softly at her. But he said nothing more about it and just resign himself to his fate. At least he had managed to get his cheeks back to normal color.

But she could see that it was enough with the teasing and so she put the bandage on him without incident and then took the remaining utensils back to the bathroom.

When she returned, Alastor was sitting on his bed. He had buttoned his shirt again and pulled his coat over it, which prevented her from seeing his black/red deer tail. But Charlie was sure that there would definitely be another opportunity to see it in the future.

“I would be finished then and leave you alone. Do you need anything else, Al?”

A slight shiver ran down her spine when she saw that mischievous sparkle in his red eyes and it didn't get any better when he motioned for her to come over to him again, which she did reluctantly. She knew she had to be vigilant, because she couldn't forget who she was dealing with here. As funny as the whole situation had been, she knew the monster he could be if he wanted to. But she trusted him and secretly she also knew that he would never hurt her, so she sat back at his side and looked at him questioningly.

As quickly as he pulled her into his arms, she couldn't even look and within seconds she was lying in his arms, with her back turned to him. A tingling of anticipation spread in her stomach, which already made her giggle and she thought she could feel his wide grin in the back of her neck. Her hands clutched his wrists, as he placed his claws flat on her stomach and drummed his fingers ever so gently against the fabric of her shirt, as a slight foretelling of what was about to happen to her.

"Al! Whahahat are you doihihihing??"

Her giggles grew louder as the claws began to wiggle gently into her shirt and she tried everything to push them off her stomach. But she couldn't do it and soon she threw her head back in laughter, pressing it firmly into his shoulder and gave in to her merriment, as she was being tickled a second time that day. She felt his breath tickle her ear, eliciting a sweet squeak from her and she tried to turn her head away from him, but he followed her every move, never stopping with the playful attack.

"Just a little warning about what will happen, if what you saw here today leaves the walls of this room, my dear," he whispered teasingly into her ear and he couldn't help but chuckle softly, as a loud squeal escaped her throat once again and at the same time she slipped out of his arms and fell into the soft bedsheets next to him. His wiggling claws chased after her and soon her loud, joyous laughter echoed throughout the room, as he didn't stop the playful tickle attack.

“Al! Nohohoho! Pleahahahase s-stop thahahat! I g-got it! Ahhh! pleahahahase, I gohohohohot it! I wohohon’t t-tell anyohohohone!” she pressed out between fits of laughter as she wrestled with his hands and quickly found out that he wasn't as weak as he had pretended to be.

“I just want to make sure the lesson gets through, Charlie. Because if you break your promise, the two of us will quickly find ourselves in my radio tower and then you can explain to my listeners what's so funny when you go live with me on the air."

That thought, along with the playfulness in his voice, was enough to make her laugh so hard that tears appeared to her eyes and it didn't get any better when he joined in her laughter.

Was he really serious about his threat?

Charlie sure didn't want to find out, because she had learned one thing today: It was a wise decision not to mess with the Radio Demon.

But these playful interactions, combined with the cheerful laughter that resulted in it, was exactly what they both needed after everything that had happened.

In the end, laughter was still the best medicine.

Or, as Alastor always used to say:

You are never fully dressed without a smile

glitteringconstellations interview

Before we get started with the interview, do you mind introducing yourself (whatever name you are comfortable with) and telling us a little about yourself?

Hi everyone! I’m glitteringconstellations, Glitter or GC for short. I’ve been writing fanfiction for well over 15 years now, though I only started sharing it around 2005. I minored in Creative Writing in college and I love writing in pretty much any capacity! When I’m not headcanoning one new story or another, though, I’m either adulting (ugh, adulting) or playing video games. These days it’s mostly Skyrim. I’m fluent in Korean and passable in Japanese and Spanish. I drink way too much pop to be healthy and I hate most fruit (though, give me any kind of melon and I’ll be a happy girl). Oh, and I’m a fledgling figure skater! I’m just a hodgepodge of random hobbies haha!

Q1: What kind of fan fiction do you normally write? Have you ever written fan fiction for other fandoms other than your current one?

A1: I tend to gravitate toward angsty fics. It’s long been my outlet of frustration, to put the character I love in harm’s way. The more pain, the better, haha! Though I do love the hurt/comfort aspect of it. Recently (as in, the last year lmao) I’ve been writing for the Voltron fandom almost exclusively (and sometimes YURI!!! On Ice), but before that I was in the k-pop ficdom (Super Junior, for the most part) for a looooong time, nearly 10 years. I won’t be opening that particular can of worms, though--I have Feelings and Opinions lmao. Before that I jumped around from anime to anime.

Q2: I see in addition to fan fiction that you do commissioned fan art! I’m not an artist myself, so I find it really interesting and cool. Do you want to talk a bit about that? And, feel free to plug yourself!

A2: This is actually a common misconception--I can’t draw to save my life!! I took commissions for fan fiction back in late June as a last resort to pay my rent. Typically though I’m horrible on a deadline so I don’t like to do it too often because I feel terrible making my commissioners wait. The art you’re referring to is the comic spread for The Parting Glass, if I’m not mistaken? I actually commissioned another artist by the name of Cota (@ccooooostuff on tumblr, go check her out she’s amazing at what she does and super sweet!) for that comic with the money I got for my birthday this year.

Q3: Do you write anything outside of fan fiction?

A3: I do! I journal a lot, or I try to anyway. This year I’m hoping to tackle an original novel for Nanowrimo, but more than likely, that particular project will start as fanfiction and we’ll see if I turn it into original fiction or not. I spend more time thinking about the things I want to write than… actually… writing them lolsob. My notes will be this gigantic document but when it comes to putting things together in a cohesive manner? Haaaaaa….haha…. The blinking cursor mocks me, I swear.

Q4: I see on your profile that you are 26. I think when most people think of fan fiction writers they think of someone younger, usually a teenager. Do you encounter younger writers a lot? What do you think of this assumption?

A4: I do encounter younger writers a lot! Surprisingly, though, most writers I know are either in their late 20s or late late teens (say, 15~19). Most people tend to think I’m young anyway just because I look a lot younger than 26, but as far as fandom goes, it doesn’t really bother me if people think I’m younger than I am. Usually I’m pretty forward with how old I am on my profile anyway! But yeah, I’ve been around the fanfiction scene a while. The k-pop fandom in particular had a way of reminding me just how long on a pretty frequent basis lol.

Q5: Why did you begin writing fan fiction? If it was for a fandom, why did that particular thing make you begin writing? And, for your current fandoms?

A5: I used to tell myself stories to get to sleep or on long car trips as far back as I can remember, and most of the time they involved characters from my favorite shows of the day. Pokemon and Digimon were two big ones for me before I hit those fun preteen years. As far as what got me started actually putting those stories to paper, it was born of frustration with shows not going the way I wanted them to, so I’d write the ending I wanted to see. For Voltron in particular, it’s just SUCH a fun sandbox to play in, be it by utilizing the incredible world-building or the plethora of interesting characters to play around with. So many possibilities! *3*

Q6: Do you ever want to be published in a professional capacity one day?

A6: Yes and no. I flip flop on this ALL the time. I’d LOVE to see my stories on shelves, but I’m actually very insecure and sometimes the thought of people reading my stories makes me want to die of embarrassment and sink to the center of the earth. That said, if I win Nano this year, I may run it by some publishers, even if only to get feedback. (Although if you want to get TECHNICAL I am officially a published journalist; I was an assistant editor for one of The Big 3 kpop news sites for a while. The one that starts with S. Also another can of worms.)

Q7: Has writing fan fiction taught you anything? About writing? Reading? The fandom? Etc.

A7: Oh absolutely. I definitely would not be the writer I am today without fan fiction. I wouldn’t say I’m super skilled, but the critique I’ve received over the years has helped me more than I have words for, honestly. Not even just in the capacity of writing fiction; my academic and professional writing has improved too. Also, just like reading anything in high volume, reading fanfic has helped me learn to read like a writer, how to pick out things that authors do that I admire and try to emulate that, and conversely what doesn’t work for me so I can avoid those things.

As far as fandom goes, fanfiction can be quite polarizing, as I’m sure you’re well aware. Just in my experience by and large it can be kind of toxic, to be quite honest. The particular issue Voltron faces that I experienced to some extent in other fandoms but not quite to this degree, is fandom policing. I find that certain members of the fandom (which, in my experience, tends to actually be mostly among those younger demographics, though not exclusively so) see certain topics as morally wrong and therefore anyone who writes those topics are 1) romanticizing said topic and 2) automatically a disgusting, horrible person and they have no problems telling you about all about it. The number one thing I try to put out there in my interactions is live and let live, ship and let ship. If it makes you uncomfortable, that’s okay! But that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong, and it’s definitely not okay to go around purporting hate in the name of “morality.” Sorry, didn’t mean to go off on a tangent there haha...

Q8: What is a piece you’ve written that you’re most proud of?

A8: Just in the Voltron fandom, I’d say the fic I’m most proud of is The Parting Glass, by far. Funny story about that one; I’d never heard the titular song before I came across a cover of it on Facebook one day around St. Patrick’s Day, and let me tell you something. The reaction I had was almost a spiritual experience, it was so visceral. I was in tears when I heard it, and the story came so hard and so fast that I wrote it in 2 days. It stayed with me until I got it down in writing. It was an interesting challenge for me, exploring the grief part of a character death fic while almost entirely omitting the actual dying part. It’s been a very long time since I’ve had such a vivid vision of exactly how a fic is going to go from start to finish and I’m quite happy with the way it turned out. Which is why, when I had the money to do so, I commissioned Cota to illustrate what had to be the hardest and yet my favorite part to write. She brought the scene to life so beautifully too, I’m really happy with how it turned out. Months later I still go back and stare at it!

Q9: Do you notice any stigma surrounding fan fiction or fan fiction writers?

A9: Without a doubt. People hear “fanfiction” and they think one of two things: the pudgy neckbeard who lives in his parents’ basement, or the rabid tween/teenage fangirl. It’s a rather unfortunate stereotype, because some works of fanfiction are truly works of art, more masterfully crafted than some novels I’ve seen published. Yet they get dismissed simply on the basis of being fanworks and not “original” (which, let’s be real, nothing is truly original anymore). One such example that comes to mind of a beautiful fic is those glittering instruments in the EXO fandom, which was based on the real-life destruction of the Library of Alexandria. If you can find a copy of it floating around the interwebs I HIGHLY recommend giving it a chance no matter what fandom you’re in!

Q10: If so, how do you feel about this stigma?

A10: Like I said, it’s really a shame. The thing, too, is that as young girls we’re often shamed for the things we’re passionate about, like boy bands and, well, fan fiction, while boys don’t get that kind of shame to such an intense degree (at least, not about the usual suspects, like sports and girls and such). Not to say that it doesn’t happen, but there’s something terribly sad about seeing more young people afraid to talk about a hobby that makes them happy because they’re afraid of being perceived as weird or gross or something like that. Hell, even to this day I have very few friends from outside the fandom sphere that know I write fanfiction, because they still talk bad and make mean jokes about fic writers. It’s such a silly thing, because a lot of famous works are derivative fiction and people don’t even realize it! So I hope the day comes soon that we can get over this silly stigma and just enjoy what people share (for free!! Seriously!! FULL NOVEL LENGTH WORKS. For FREE.)

Q11: Is there anything you’ve ever wanted to talk about or be asked that no one has asked you about or given you the opportunity to talk about? (And if so, feel free to answer/talk about it).

A11: I really had to think about this one! I couldn’t really pick one topic that I’ve really wanted to talk about that I haven’t already discussed, but no one has ever asked me if I was okay with having fanart of my work. Which I would answer with a resounding YES. I am more than okay with it QuQ

Oh, I guess I do have something!! It’s unrelated to writing (well, I guess it could be related, depending on how you look at it) but since I have your attention, if you’re an American citizen GO OUT AND VOTE. The midterm elections are one week from today in the USA and it’s important you go vote!! I won’t tell you who to vote for (a third can of worms I’m not opening up. WHY DO I HAVE SO MANY WORMS) but I assure you, your vote matters, now more than ever. I believe in you!! Go vote!!!

Q12: What is your prefered site for writing/posting fan fiction?

A12: These days I prefer to use AO3. It’s a work in progress, but it’s far and away the superior fic platform of the time. Back in ye olden days (circa 2010~2012) Livejournal was my platform of choice, and FF.net before that. A surprising number of people prefer to post their fic on tumblr, to which I say, are you out of your flipping MIND?!?! Tumblr is soooo temperamental, I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve had to restart a post or go into the HTML editor because the rich text editor decided to be stupid. Noooooo thank you. I’ll stick to AO3 thanks ahaha!

Check out Glitter’s Tumblr and AO3.

Interviewer Note: Glitter used her free question to encourage everyone to vote and I would just like to stress the importance of this, especially if live in the US. Young people are the demographic that votes the least, despite being the demographic that will have to live the longest with the outcome of the vote. If you are currently not registered, please register as it is important for all of our futures. And, remember the deadline for the upcoming US election is Nov. 6th, so make sure to get to those polls and/or turn/send in your ballot. If you need information on how to do any of these things, do not hesitate to reach out to my page and I will point you to trustworthy resources. 

Reblogging this since I’ve gained a few followers since I posted this 🙂. Thank you all for the amazing support so far, I am honestly overwhelmed with how welcoming this community has been. I still have many, many posts to queue up. Once I finish with my one shots, I will create a master list and then may consider crossposting some or all of my fics.

Feel free to follow me on Wattpad and AO3 where I am also FarFromSuga.

So, Uh, Hi, Tumblr

Hi Tumblr! I’m FarFromSuga, but you can call me Alyce. I’ve been a long time reader on Tumblr but tended to post my fic over on Wattpad. However, I’ve decided to start cross posting my imagines/one shots and probably eventually my fics.

I’m still working out exactly how Tumblr works (dividers and all that) so things will be a bit rough. A master list will eventually be created and I will likely have the help of my friend @moonchezz. So hang in there! My blog will eventually be navigable.

In the mean time, I’ll hopefully queue up some more posts later. In the meantime, go follow my fanfic recommendations blog, @alycereads. I’ve also opened up asks! Feel free to ask me pretty much anything and I’ll answer on my blog so y’all can get to know me.

You can find out my basic info below. However, let me answer a couple questions first. 1). I’m not currently taking requests. I’m a 40 hour a week working adult and only have time to write what I want. I may open up requests and am always open to hearing ideas, I just cannot guarantee they will ever happen. 2). I won’t answer super private questions. Otherwise, fair game!

A little about Alyce:

I’m 23. Born in 1997 and just barely 2 months older than Jungkook lol

My pronouns are She/Her

I have a degree in Creative Writing

I’ve been writing BTS fan fic for 3 years, but have been actively writing for 10 years now

I wrote 1D fanfic back in the day 🤭

I’m an INFP.

My big three of astrology are: Cancer Sun, Aries Moon, Scorpio Rising

I’m a Ravenclaw

My bias is Min Yoongi. But I’m pretty much OT7

I do stan other Kpop groups. The main ones being: GOT7, EXID, (G)-Idle, Twice, and Mamamoo. I also like soloists: Sunmi (my Queen), Chungha, Jessi, Eric Nam.

I currently only write for BTS. However, you may see other idols appear occasionally 🙂

You can find me on Wattpad and AO3 as FarFromSuga and on Instagram as farfromsuga_

All right that about sums me up. Feel free to ask anything you’re curious about and look out for more of my one shots to be published soon. Thank you to everyone who loved Lock & Key (seriously, I did not expect the one with an obvious typo Tumblr won’t let me fix to get the most notes).

That’s all. For now.

Sincerely,

Alyce

I just saw a post on the x reader tag complaining about smut writers and I just have to go off on a little rant.

That poster complains that if you can only read or write smut then you have a porn addiction which is an absurd and hyperbolic claim to make in itself but the vitriol that people have for those who have actual porn addictions is sad. Porn addiction is addiction. Addiction affects people’s life to the point where it is detrimental to that individual’s life to the point where it’s hardly functional. There are people with actual addictions struggling with that shit. Writing and reading smut on motherfucking tumblr.com isn’t a fucking addiction. No one’s hurting anyone. Not even you annoying fuckers who read posts that clearly aren’t meant for you.

People like this make it hard for writers on tumblr to write anything because purity culture and the morality police wants to dictate what people write as if the smut genre isn’t a whole industry in itself (literal smut novelists out there making money off this shit). Don’t fucking come into a smut tag if you are going to complain about smut, don’t complain about smut when a post boldly specifies smut and has all its warning. It’s so fucking weird to complain about something you do not wish to see only to voluntarily expose yourself to it. It’s giving miserable and i hope you find happiness.

I write what I want and I am a horny ass bitch and I don’t have to be ashamed of it because women can have agency over their own sexuality, on their own terms. Feel free to block me if you can’t handle that.

Rant done.

It's always

"When will fanfic writers update their stories?"

And never

"Does this fanfic writer have adequate enrichment to engage in writing behaviours?"

Fanfiction writers (Scriptor fictus) are intelligent animals who need plenty of enrichment as well as encouragement! If they're stuck in poor conditions (e.g. have studies, work, have to actually write to have something written) then they require the proper enrichment to engage in more healthy behaviours, like writing. Remember, due to poor breeding and socialisation, over half of all fanfic writers suffer from low self confidence and executive dysfunction so take care of them!

Give your fanfic writers proper care. Fanfiction writers are a life long commitment.