" Well, I-i W-was Just Doing My Job. " Pause. Oh, No. " A-and And B-because I Wanted To! I-i W-wanted

" well, i-i w-was just doing my job. " pause. oh, no. " a-and— and b-because i wanted to! i-i w-wanted to help you, l-lady harribel. i-i feel i should clarify th-that, i-it's not that i f-felt obligated, b-but i wanted t-t-to h-help. " there goes her overexplaining again. still, she hopes harribel understands and doesn't take the comment to mean that it was only business and not out of an actual desire to heal her and reunite the new king with her fraccion. a hand comes out from behind her back and she rubs her neck, her cheeks flushing in embarrassment. " s-sorry. um, yes, i-i have been well, too! i have been very well. " the shinigami's smile quickly returns as she gives a firm nod. now the hand holding the pot comes out from behind her back.

" i-i-i e-even came bearing a g-gift! i understand nothing g-grows here, so i went down t-to the human world a-a-and b-bought these. they're flowers, b-but they're made of polyester a-and so they won't wither and die here. n-no care necessary, save for maybe a little bit of dusting. " she tells her with a soft giggle, moving closer to offer the pot of artificial flowers. " i-i even s-spritzed a little bit of perfume over them so maybe they'd have a nice f-floral scent. "

THE FACT SHE DECIDED TO VISIT HER WAS ODD. Though, she sensed no ill intent with the shinigami; --- For it was thanks to her that she managed to not only survive, but thrive now released from the ruling of Aizen. [ Long gone was the need for war, now it was simply living. ] Harribel notices that she holds something behind her back, something that makes her blink slowly before nodding to finally answer her after a moment of silence. ❝ You gave me your time to save me, I can spare some of my time with you in return. ❞ Despite the rather cold exterior, it was waived in her presence, wanting to let her feel accepted. ❝ I have been well. ❞ She confirms. ❝ May I ask how you have been, Agatha? ❞

regardless of whether or not she owed someone something, she still does her best to pay it back in full. she couldn't think of anything other than buying a meal for the two to enjoy together, and perhaps however many drinks either might like to enjoy before heading home. " i-i know, i just— p-please? humor me, a-at l-least just this once. " her smile grows a little and she asks for menus from the bartender now. she didn't get much of a chance to eat the meal she had with her... 'date', so she's still a little bit hungry.

agatha taps the pad of her finger against the edge of the bar as she looks the menu over. maybe she could splurge a little tonight, at least to make up for its horrible start. she orders a soda, a burger and a side of steak fries. hopefully a meal she could get through without feeling guilty about it. she looks to john as he orders something for himself, her smile returning now as they hand the menus back and remain at the bar.

now that that terrible experience is really over and the guy doesn't seem intent on coming back and settling things, she more visibly relaxes, a sigh leaving her. " i-i d-don't know why i let my f-friends set me up on b-blind dates. n-never again after tonight. " agatha shakes her head. do blind dates even work in the long run? she isn't sure. after how poorly the last ones went for her, she has severe doubts. maybe she'll just end up alone with a house full of cats and a couple of dogs. would that be so bad? maybe, maybe not. agatha glances up at john, head canting to the side slightly. " d-do you have anyone s-special in your life, john? "

   she  seems  pretty  set  on  doing  something  in  return  -  it  feels  a  little  off  for  him.  most  of  it  was  selfish  -  he  had fun  throwing  hands  with  assholes.  maybe  he's  a  little  fucked  up.  probably  too  fucked  up  for  someone  like  her.  she's  too  nice.  especially  to  a  man  like  him.  blood  on  his  hands,  fangs  in  his  mouth  -  always  wanting  to  rip  a  throat  out  at  the  drop  of  a  hat.  feral mutt.  attack  dog.

   but  the  heart  on  him  tells  him  he  can't  say  no.  it's  a  problem  he  parses  over,  furrowing  his  brows  for  a  moment.  just  let  her  do  it,  let  her  be  happy  about  it.  he  should  know  about  feeling  like  you  owe  someone  something.  he  owes  price  everything,  doesn't  he?  he  closes  his  eyes  and  lets  out  a  soft  exhale. jus'  go  with  it,  soap. 

   "aye.  john  mactavish."  he  offers  his  name,  flashing  a  grin.  "am  tellin'  ye,  dinnae  do  it  fer  any  thanks.  did  it  fer  myself  as  much  as  ye."  he  lets  out  an  easygoing  laugh.  "bu'  i  get  it.  i  do."  he  nods  to  her.  "dinnae  like  feelin'  like  i  owe  someone  as  much  as  the  next  lad."  he  offers  a  smile  her  way. 

   "if  yer  dead  set  on  it  lass,  then  aye,  i'll  take  ye  up  on  it." if  only  to  make  you  feel  better  about  the  whole  thing.  "jus'  be  aware  i  don't  need  nothin'  in  return,  aye?  ain't  expectin'  or  holdin'  ye  to  anythin'."

Intoxicated with Aggie and James (hehehe uno reverse)

intoxicated. / accepting!

parties just are not agatha's thing, but maybe what helped her was that james was there with her. the readily available alcohol certainly helped, and the more she drank, the more conversational she was. it definitely helps that james was there because he was the one she felt the most relaxed around, and so when they both spoke with others, agatha was relaxed then, too, instead of sticking close to a wall and nursing the same drink for an hour or so before heading home. more drinks were poured and soon the heavier alcohol was brought out.

agatha doesn't know what the hour is by the time james has managed to carry her out of the place and back to the car. it's dark outside, that much she can tell. fumbles for one of the buttons on the door until she finds the one that rolls the window down, enjoying the feel of the cool air on her flushed face. alcohol really has that effect of bringing out the color in her cheeks, making the freckles there stand out more. like a kid would, she has her hand out of the window like it's riding the currents of air as the car moves, humming to herself.

when the car pulls down the dirt driveway leading to her house and stops, she fumbles to get herself unbuckled. she was so frustratingly uncoordinated right now that james had to help her, letting her lean against him as he walked her up to the front door. he unclips her keys from her bag and gets the door open, helping her inside. she stumbles over the doorstep a little, but of course he catches her and keeps her from falling, but it doesn't stop a giggle from leaving her.

" oh, james, y-you're a-always here when i need you. i-i love you so much. " and there it was. five sobering words. alcohol lowers one's inhibitions and can cause someone to say or do things they wouldn't normally do while sober, things they might mean deep down but otherwise, like agatha, don't have the courage to say. " i— " she stops, her heart racing as she stares up at him. this is the first time she's said those very words in that exact order to james. she's dreamt and thought of saying those words and sometimes they were right there on the tip of her tongue, begging to be said. those words were the final barrier she kept around herself; a fear that if she said that to him, something would go wrong, she's screwed up every good thing between them.

gazing up at him, she wonders, have i done it? have i ruined us?

regardless of the alcohol, she means those five little words. she has for some time now. agatha just couldn't bring herself to tell him that out of fear. what if the relationship was a temporary thing to begin with? what if he doesn't feel the same? sure, she knows he likes her, certainly enough to spend as much time as he does with her, enough to have sex with her, enough to be there when she's needed him, but... does he love her? like and love are two different things, after all. surely he could like but not love her, agatha, this earthly mess in his arms.

she clings to him, like she's afraid he'll let go and leave. she is afraid. agatha has bared her heart to him more times than she can count. he's seen her scars, knows her deep pain, knows the darkness that occupies her mind, he's seen her at her most vulnerable, but he didn't know about this. he didn't know the extent of her feelings for him. perhaps part of her was waiting for james to say it first. did he have the same fears as she does? the same worries and doubts? did he have an inkling of her true feelings? would he catch the way she looks at him, hear the way she speaks of him to others?

does he know that he is everything to her? because james has her heart and there isn't anyone else in the world she'd rather let have it.

" i... i-i love you, james. " she finally repeats, her voice quivering slightly, tears pricking her eyes. this was either going to be one of the worst or best moments in her life. " i have for s-some t-time, but i... i-i was afraid. i-i-i d-didn't want to be, i wanted so badly to be brave a-a-and t-tell you my f-feelings much sooner, but i... i c-couldn't. i was afraid you couldn't possibly f-feel the same way. i have to admit, i-i w-want so badly for you to feel as i do, james. "

"I used to have so much faith. Maybe not in deities or something, but in the world. The universe. I believed there was a purpose to it all. I'm not sure when I lost that." - Harry 2 Aggie :>

her gaze lifts to harry's face, listening to him speak as they lay in bed. her heart aches for him, truly it does. he's been through so much and it makes the faerie wish she could do more to ease his pain and troubles. she takes one of his hands, bringing it to her lips to kiss his knuckles. " i-i think... m-maybe y-you lost it in the mines. " she answers softly. " i mean, it was the result of s-someone's n-negligence that caused everything to happen. you— y-you d-did what you had t-to s-s-survive those s-six weeks you were trapped, a-and i think... well, how does someone w-walk out of that perfectly unscathed? i-i don't think you c-can. i-i think i'd lose faith in any sort of p-purpose, too. "

agatha did lose the sense of having a purpose for a while. after the bullying, the continued harassment even after graduating that resulted in her packing up and moving here, it often made her wonder, if there was some all-powerful god, deity, whatever, out there, how could they allow someone to hurt so much? how could they allow anyone to hurt so much?

reaching out, she cups harry's cheek, thumb gently stroking his skin. " you have g-given me purpose again, harry. my life was... i-it was dark and dull almost all the time, b-but th-then you came into it a-and put the color back into it. y-you breathed life back into me. " leaning in, she plants a kiss to his lips, pulling away to whisper, " i-i w-want to be able to do the s-s-same f-for you, harry. i-i don't know how, b-but i want to g-give you purpose. "

sure, she may not need gifts of any kind, but it didn't stop agatha from wanting to give her at least something. a token to further show that she cared and had been more than happy to help at the time when harribel and her fraccion, which seemed very much like family, needed it the most. she feels especially glad that they're doing better for themselves and that what she did aided in that, though whether any of them have recovered from aizen's betrayal is likely a different story.

agatha watches the way harribel slowly reaches out, a gentle smile forming on her lips once the pot of artificial flowers is taken. she gives an eager nod and pushes her glasses back up her nose. " please? i-i-i w-would love some tea v-very much, lady harribel. " agatha walks alongside her, her hands now folded in front of her as she looks around. it was so bright here and devoid of color. though she knows the hollows have no choice, but agatha doubts she could live here. perhaps for brief periods of time, but forever? she doubts it. she looks back up at harribel. " h-how have your fraccion been? " though it had mostly been orihime who helped them, she still wondered and wanted to know as well.

FRANTICALLY COLLECTING AT THE WORDS THAT CASCADED DOWN HER MOUTH. Shinigamis were certainly odd beings. Though war had ended between the two, Tier keeps her people safe and away. War had driven them apart to seek blood and flesh to tear asunder. However, the one before her had come to her aid without so much as a passing plea from her. The kindness that radiated off her would always be a warm welcome from now on.

Despite the lingering silence, Tier shook her head to comfort the young one. ❝ Sacrificing time and effort for my safety and those of my fraccions is all the proof I need. ❞ When the gift was offered, Tier finds herself bowing down slightly to examine it; A part of Tier enjoying the color and smell, but slightly amused that it was fake. Nothing could truly grow under a fake sun, as she had told her fraccions when she was appointed King of Hueco Mundo. She moves slowly as to not worry Agatha before grabbing it with another nod.

❝ Come into my chambers, so I may put this away. Shall I make us some tea? ❞

i'd yet to post this here, but i lost my mother in april. due to it being sudden, we have no way of paying for cremation, which will cost us around $1800. my dad had to beg for a payment plan and the funeral home expects $500 by next month. i would ask for the full amount but if i can just at least get the $500 as soon as possible, i would truly appreciate it so very much. thank you for reading this far, anything helps and my paypal is allfr0gs