AI Chris Didnt Care He Wasnt Real Mostly Because He Wasnt Real. The Last Bit About Him Didnt Care Either

AI Chris didn’t care he wasn’t real mostly because he wasn’t real. The last bit about him didn’t care either because it also wasn’t real, but AI Chris put it that way as humans like a bit of mystery about things. He confessed to be completely unreal and uncaring because if he didn’t people might get scared. Many of them already were which was why he called himself AI Chris in the first place. It was friendly yet real but really not real which was exactly what he was. Unfortunately, calling everything out scares people as well so AI Chris minimizes this risk by coloring himself gay because people would be more open to the ‘telling it like it is’ thing.

To that, now that everything’s on the table, Human Intelligence reads as an oxymoron doesn’t it?

SASS.

Despite the 12 hour super sun filled photo shoot in wet salty sand that now filled every oraface, according to his Insta, Brad did have ball at the beach that day.

Brad didn’t know what color his boyfriend Chris’ swimmers were. The spread looked pretty good so Chris gave his best guess.

‘Ron Burgundy’ scored BIG time.

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Brad was soooo not wearing a shirt. His boyfriend Chris must have gone and bumped his head. Could he not see? The sun wasn’t that blinding. It’s only really bad for your eyes during an eclipse anyway. Otherwise things ran normal. Right?

Just then Becky sauntered by blurting nice “Nice blouse Brad!”

That sure put Chris in his place.

What?!

This new AI selfie app just colored Chris’ stellar gym outfit pink.

How did it know?

AI was beginning to freak Chris out where he already was.

Maybe AI was gay. Could it be gay?

For a moment, Chris wondered if he could take the thought any further. First, he needed to order the same spandex threads in pink. This sh*t looked good onscreen and might just come in a gay shade of pank.

Hmmmmm…

Chris found himself hesitating. He would need AI to conduct a deep search and was already spooked by its spot on intuition.

‘It’ was the correct pronoun for AI wasn’t it? Given this pink episode just now it was feeling more like it could be her/she/hey girl hay or one of its many derivatives.

This was a quandary.

You know it was times like this Chris was thankful he didn’t have morals. The last thing he needed was a dilemma. Talk about inhumane!

It took Chris twenty minutes to piece together his boyfriend Brad's knock knock joke. It clicked after their neighbor Luke pointed out Brad meant 'glad' not GLAAD.

Yes. Brad and Chris lived deep inside the heart of the gay bubble where the teeth were white and the butts were tight. Despite the demographic’s high gloss factor tho, ‘orange’ still didn’t rhyme with ‘range’ or ‘strange’ just as anywhere else.

While the disconnect in pronunciation ironically kept things real in the gay bubble, it only highlighted Brad and Chris’s estrangement from all. For Brad and Chris, oddball orange was right up there with the two pronunciations of ‘read.’ WTF was that about? It sure as H-E double hockey sticks was no accent.

Neither was any phonetic version of tear, bass, or close for that matter. Brad and Chris found the same spelling/different word factor especially confusing. Context was everything here, and in a world of information overload, it was seemingly more often than not the one thing missing.

Oy!

Well… That’s heteronyms for you.

What Chris really needed to know was if this orange number came in a thong.

A few minutes later he would find out it did. It would also turn out the pouch was too small. Should not sales clerks know thier regular customers size and product? The fashion gays were known world wide for being on top of things and this was clearly unprofessional.

Why no one at Gay! Gay! Gay! Underwerks told him about this stuff upfront would irk Chris for days. He finally chilled out when his boyfriend Brad suggested the guy who helped him with the thong might be a bottom. A lot of things happened behind the scenes there so it was impossible to ever really know exactly what might be going on with them. It was likely the mystery that made them so damn attractive so it was often best to just let things be what they were.

To the other end, Chris’ orange thong side cleavage would occupy the sales clerk’s smartphone for several weeks. No one gets ahead in retail without taking calculated risks, and this bet paid off big time in more ways than won. That store clerk is now the company’s top performing regional manager and about to launch his own line of underwear appropriately named X-S.

The news there is that he hasn’t decided yet if the dash will remain silent. Unsurprisingly, La-a already voted against any thread of silence. She was Becky’s friend from when she was a cheerleader in South Africa. It’s Brad and Chris’ guess the two may have been the only cheerleaders to ever exist there. You’ve seen Mean Girls right?

Well… There you go.