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@amaeranthos | non-verbal rp starters | accepting.
💕 Pull my muse in for a tender kiss ( Sirius for Athena
It’s been too long since she’s seen him. She’s forgotten, as much as she’d like to say she remembers, his scent. Lingering laughs that haunt her waking hours when she thinks he’s around the corner, only to find he’s not. Promises and the familiar brush of his laughter on her skin isn’t there as she wishes. Those mornings that she wakes up without him beside her leaves her hollow, touching the place she’s grown accustomed to doing to bother him awake.
To this day, she still finds her hands wandering over to his pillow, only to grab air and cold sheets.
He was and is her moment of weakness. In a time when she’s already struggling with her place, her role, and her identity, he made it easy. That’s what mattered, at the end of the day. Once two outcasts, and perhaps even then, still outcasts of a different sort, had their ways together.
Ten years, Athena thinks with a wry smile. Too long, and much too much time lost. It’s an ache that she’s certain she won’t be able to fill again at the loss and grief she’s accrued from her time spent, defending, and angry with the world around her as they unjustifiably announced him guilty without a trial. Yelling until she’s lost her voice and then her voice gets lost among the laughter, the bureaucratic idiocy as they ignored her pleas.
Athena thought she’s lost more than just her sense of normalcy, she lost her heart.
And now, she finds herself watching as Sirius interacts with Harry with a warmth and an emotion too strong in her heart to quiet. Athena can feel Remus’ curious gaze on her, both of them partaking in a drink together as Sirius and Harry are playing an aggressive game of cards. ( Athena says aggressive but honestly, it’s all in good fun. )
After excusing herself to get everyone another round of drinks, she misses the way all of their eyes follow her out of the room, unaware she’s been too deep in her thoughts today for them to not notice. In the kitchen, Athena is preparing her drink when she smells him before she sees him.
Sometimes, there are those days where she knows and he knows. Perhaps, today has been one of those days when she turns and sighs against his gentle embrace, tugging her close. The soft press of his lips against hers soothes whatever frayed edges she’s had and when they part, she closes her eyes and rests her head against his chest.
starter call muse roulette ( of whoever is awake ) always open | @amaeranthos ( sirius )
She’s forgotten what it’s like to have him near. She’s forgotten what it’s like when he smiles at her and her heart skips a beat. All of those untold years of grief and separation has left its mark and while she’s aware of how much time is being spent of them being together, she’s forgotten.
And it’s as though she’s in falling in love all over again.
It’s morning, one where they’re trying to grow comfortable with the separation of Harry being at school and Sirius spending time in the little cottage in Hogsmeade. While Remus has his own room, the business that Sirius and he needed to attend were of the utmost importance. And so, it left the two of them alone in the small cottage. It’s one of the days where Sirius doesn’t have work or the obligations he signed up for that requires him on campus.
Athena could almost say that it’s a day off.
Her eyes flutter open when he sits up and she sees his back, where his tattoo is inked into his skin and the permanent scar embedded into his skin. Athena moves before she thinks of moving, eager and needing to touch in the quiet of the morning. She slowly runs her palm along his back until her arms wrap around his torso and she’s resting her cheek against his back. Her other hand rests against his chest, right over his heart.
❝Come back to sleep,❞ Athena murmurs, her voice husky with sleep. ❝I think you can sacrifice a few hours for some sleep, Sirius.❞
Lord Sirius Black returns amid news of pardon, it reads in bold print across the top of the page. A hero of the war done wrong, victim of a flawed system, reclaiming the Boy Who Lived as rightful guardian.
It should be expected, but to see it in her hands after all this time leaves Athena feeling more emotions than she’s felt in a long time. The anger, the blatant frustration, and the grief that comes with losing someone so important that she’s struggling to breathe. After the hilarious show of the last Wizengamot session, honestly, this news article is no different from that fiasco of a meeting. Dumbledore is forced to listen to the proceedings, unwilling to let go of Harry and watched as his plans fell to ruin by the very man she had long since thought to be still in Azkaban.
It’s been so long since she’d seen him. A tall, lean man dressed in black dragon leather with his slicked back hair and neatly trimmed beard. He looked back at her as he stood on the floor, taking his place as Head of Black and becoming the Regent of House Potter. And he never looked better.
He looks healthy.
Athena didn’t even have a chance to breathe when she watched him in the proceedings, speaking up when she should and remembering the words Remus told her of Sirius’ plans. But, to have been a witness to such a spectacle where the political scene in Wizengamot is overturned brought her more joy than the last few years since she’s been there. Truly, it is Sirius’ masterpiece and his best prank of all time.
In some ways, it’s very much like him and she doesn’t have the heart to be angry.
It’s only a miracle that Remus and her managed to find one another after the session. She had to watch as Sirius is ushered off by Cornelius and Dumbledore that she didn’t even get to snag a simple hello. The only point of contact they had at all is the acknowledgement that brought him to the floor in recognition of his place as Head of House Black. But even then, Athena knows how he worked, or at least, used to, and could only assume that he’d be so focused, she isn’t even sure if he saw her there. Remus gave her permission to go and see Sirius, a silent apology in his eyes that she knew.
It’s been over ten years since they’ve seen each other last.
She takes the floo, the best way of getting there and finds herself entering a quaint room, comfortable, and warm. Dusting herself off, she finds that it’s different from what she expected, considering his descriptions of his home in on Grimmauld street is lined with much darker and heavier colors that are more in line with the dark aesthetic of House Black. But here, she can sense the warmth, the love, and light that touches every corner of the room and she thinks of Harry, the boy that Sirius has adopted.
Footsteps draw her attention and she turns to find Sirius opening the door and it’s as if the world comes to a halt. Athena always thought that such things are myths, romantic inclinations that are left in romantic novels. The world simply does not disappear from around a person just because they’ve seen someone. But here she is, reliving the first time she’s met him, annoying and too mischievous of a boy that leaves her frustrated and the world melts into the distance. He’s here, in front of her, and alive. Cleared of his crime that’s falsely accused, happy now that he is no longer in that dreary place, and healthy that there is a light in his eyes that she hasn’t seen in over a decade.
It’s only when he finally calls her name does she return and Athena could only help a weak smile. Her eyes burn and her nose tickles that it’s all she could do to hold back her emotions that beat hard and fast against her chest.
❝Did you think I wouldn’t be able to?❞ she asks, her voice wavering that she struggles past the lump in her throat. Athena matches Sirius and takes a step toward him. ❝How have you been? Have you been well?❞ Questions that avoid addressing the meeting, and yet, Athena knows that they’re too intimate with one another to resort to such small talk. She takes another step, her eyes shimmering all sorts of colors that’s unable to be hidden, her metamorphagus nature revealing her emotions. Even then, her eyes gleam bright, threatening with tears when she takes yet another step forward until he’s close enough to touch.
And before she even realizes what’s happening, her arms wrap themselves around his torso into a tight embrace. Any words Athena might’ve said are gone, swallowed up by the overwhelming emotions that leave her clinging to the man she never thought she would see again.
↳ plotted started ( sirius ) : @yiqiannian ( athena )
𝐀 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐃𝐘 𝐈𝐍 𝐏𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄. Sirius hums to himself as he thumbs through the morning Prophet, grey eyes skimming the headline accompanied by a photo of himself arriving to the Wizengamot clad in the traditional Black robes. Lord Sirius Black returns amid news of pardon, it reads in bold print across the top of the page. While Skeeter is a vile woman and he’s more than aware that she’s turn on him the first chance she sees, he can’t help but be grateful for her sensationalist writing style spread across the front page. A hero of the war done wrong, victim of a flawed system, reclaiming the Boy Who Lived as rightful guardian. He couldn’t have engineered a better response from the public if he’d tried, honestly.
He’s one more step closer to fulfilling his promise to his dearly departed friends, carving a world that can better protect Harry from those who wish him harm. Sirius wants to protect Harry more than he’s wanted anything else in his life, the wish to do right by James and Lily combined with his love for the boy he sees as his son an overwhelming force. How fitting, that James Potter had saved his life once and now his son had done the same, giving Sirius a reason to live. Back at Hogwarts, in the darkest time of his life, there had ever only been one person who had come close to fulfilling Sirius in such a way.
Athena.
She was the brightest light in his life and his heart’s biggest regret. He wonders where she’d gone after his arrest, wonders if she’d believed the charges. Perhaps she thought he deserved Azkaban? Her faith in him had been absolute, but she’d been disappointed by him more than once before. As much as the thought tore his very heart asunder, Sirius couldn’t find himself to blame her—even Remus, his dearest friend and the only other surviving Marauder had believed it as well. Just another lost chance, another unfinished chapter etched in his heart, another regret to be added to the pile.
Swallowing around the sudden lump in his throat, Sirius stands from his desk and brushes trembling fingers against his trousers. No use dwelling on old heartbreaks, after all. He glances toward the missed message Penelope had scrawled for him, a communication from Moony himself penned in her excellent handwriting. PADFOOT, URGENT. Just what in Merlin’s name does that mean? His first thought is danger—something to do with the Horcruxes or even possibly a threat to Harry’s safety. Just the thought sends anxiety skittering down his spine, and Sirius is well on his way to breaking into a dead sprint for the floo when he hears the tell-tale whoosh of someone’s arrival through it.
Sirius can’t help but bark a laugh at Remus’ perfect timing, a bittersweet smile quirking his lips as he opens the door to the parlour with a jovial greeting dying on his lips.
A familiar stranger steps out from the floo, hair like midnight spilling across her shoulders and dark eyes sending his heart into his throat. He suddenly can’t breathe, can’t speak, his chest squeezed tight as a rush of memories threatens to overtake him. That first prank he’d pulled on her. Defending her from Lucius Malfoy’s machinations and being protected by her in return. Their first kiss, hidden in the shadows of the courtyard in the dead of night. Sneaking glances across Potions class, fingers intertwining behind everyone’s backs, late nights spent talking hidden away from the prying eyes of others. Asking her to marry him, her smile as she’d accepted, their final night together before Peter’s betrayal. So many promises whispered between them, so many oaths left unfulfilled.
❛ Athena ? ❜ His voice catches in his throat, her name whispered with the sort of reverence saved for speaking of one’s god, his fingers trembling as he takes a single, uncertain step toward her. ❛ I… how did you find me? ❜
ℙ𝔸𝔻𝔽𝕆𝕆𝕋 [ amaeranthos. ]
𝐈𝐓’𝐒 𝐀 𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆-𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐍 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐓𝐇. The moment her arms come around him, Sirius feels a long lost piece of himself slip back into place. For the first time in thirteen years, he feels whole and secure enough to allow himself to sink into another person’s touch, spine bowing as he all but wraps himself entirely around her. His arms wrap around her shoulders, his face burying into the crook of her neck, coming apart in her arms despite him standing two heads taller than her. It’s not until his fingers are gripping the fabric of her shirt that Sirius realises he’s clinging to her like his lifeline, as if without her he’d sink back into the depths of despair he’d crawled out of in Azkaban.
Tears sting his eyes, the heavy weight of his years in that dank cell falling from his shoulders like a warm winter coat. Instead of long, skeletal fingers leaving claws of ice in his flesh, it’s warm fingers made soft by plum-blossom scented oils weaving nonsensical patterns in their wake. Instead of the deep, cloying darkness that had left him blind for days on end within his cell, there is nothing but light and the soft, wavering chuckle of the woman in his arms. For the first time since he’d been banished to Azkaban, Sirius feels as if the oppressive call of the Dementor’s song is completely and utterly drowned out by the brilliance of Athena’s gentle touch.
( If he weren’t so prideful, he could have wept then and there. )
Instead of allowing himself to break, to fall apart into the sobbing mess he’s successfully put off for his entirety of adulthood, Sirius instead takes full advantage of this moment to pull Athena’s slight frame tighter against his chest. His face is buried in her hair and he’s more than a little convinced they must paint a very awkward picture as they are—his much taller frame curled around her, trembling like a lost child on the verge of tears—but he can’t bring himself to step away from her embrace. This is… something he’s needed, something he’d been denied for so long that he’d forgotten what it was like. He’s been so busy setting the stage to take custody of Harry, so busy making sure that Harry is safe and whole and happy, protected and taken care of in all aspects, that Sirius hadn’t really faced the scars left in his imprisonment’s wake.
For this one moment, Athena’s embrace is keeping the shattered remnants of Sirius Black whole.
❛ I’ve always known you could find me anywhere in the world if you wanted, Scales. I just I wasn’t sure. ❜ He swallows around the lump in his throat, eyes screwing stubbornly shut against the fresh wave of regret that pools in his gut. He has to work to keep his voice even, the sound of it rough even to his own ears. ❛ Merlin, I’ve missed you. ❜
Truth be told, Sirius hasn’t been held since their last night together. Even in terms of a simple embrace of friendship of familial love, Sirius has only ever given Harry hugs for comfort when he’d needed it. He and Remus simply don’t have that sort of relationship, and there’s truly no one else that Sirius surrounds himself so closely with. Even if he’d considered looking, between lingering emotions left unacknowledged and his utmost priority being Harry, it’s just not something that Sirius can be bothered for. Being a source of comfort to his adopted son had been fulfilling enough, but now Sirius is acutely aware of the fact that he hasn’t sought out to do the same for himself. To have someone hold him to help him feel better, well…
He’d forgotten just how good it feels.
Stubborn to a fault, Sirius doesn’t want to let go of her—to let go of this moment—despite realising it may not be entirely acceptable to prolong it. Still, he doesn’t pull himself from her embrace, choosing to instead slide his hands from her shoulders to rest on her lower back in a less desperate, clinging sort of touch. ( He’s mindful, of course, of keeping the touch platonic as possible. Just in case. ) Allowing himself to straighten up a bit, he instead rests his cheek against the crown of her head in what he hopes is still an acceptable form of contact between them.
❛ Moony sent you, then? A bloody poor message he left me, then. He is officially the worst steward of all time. ❜ He gives in to his desire to speak, to break the silence, but refuses to ask the questions that are forming a lump in his throat. ( Does she still feel the same? Did she think of me? Did she wait? ) He’s a selfish man, but not so selfish as to put her in such a position just as they’ve reunited. Not like this. Not right now. Athena was always his friend first. He quirks a small grin and chuckles, a mirthful sound low in his throat.
❛ Harry’d be thrilled to meet you says he’s always wanted to meet a dragon. ❜
It’s as though a lost piece of herself comes back to her when he wraps his arms around her in return, burying his face into the crook of her neck that her fingers dig into his back, grabbing for grip on his clothes. He’s here, she thinks, he’s here and alive and—
Panicked, near hysterical, thoughts of relief, pain, anguish, and heartache that’s left her from over a decade of being without him, Athena crumples against him. Just as she does, she feels his fingers dig into her clothes, her skin, and the sharp familiarity of how she hasn’t forgotten his touch carves a breathless sob to tighten their embrace. She doesn’t realize she’s crying until he pulls her tighter, closer, to him and she tries her best to bring him in as much as she is able to.
She can’t help but compare Sirius to the Sirius she remembers: thinner, harder, and leaner than he ever was back when they were first together. She wonders how much suffering he’s gone through when he was in Azkaban, how malnourished he became, and how he’s managed to remain sane for so long. Though she already knows the answer, she can’t tell if it’s her that’s shaking or he is that the relief is palpable. It’s been thirteen years since she’s seen the man she called her fiancé that she’s shaken by how he looks, how he feels, and how pained they both are.
A woman who was called insane for remaining steadfast in her belief that Sirius fell on deaf ears. A woman who has “no place” in Wizengamot despite the fact she is the Head of her Ancient House and whose authority surpassed even most of the other Ancient Noble houses there. Power that is perhaps on par with the Chief Warlock, but her position as something more of an “honorary” place since the establishment of the Ministry of Magic. The disdain, the disrespect she hasn’t faced since she was a small teenager at Hogwarts comes back threefolds whenever she steps foot into the foolish meetings that occurs at Wizengamot. Athena has been alone in believing Sirius’ innocence, Remus falling short several years into Sirius’ unlawful sentence.
And here he is, innocent, strong, and free.
When he finally speaks, it’s hoarse with emotion, and her eyes burn once more with overwhelming relief and happiness. But, he works through the emotion with force, practice, she thinks, to keep a lid on his feelings as much as she is. His voice falls on her ear, the skin on her neck, and she squeezes him to her. Especially when he calls her with the nostalgic nickname she hasn’t heard since he... since he was taken, and a fresh wave of tears threaten to overwhelm her again.
❝Then, never be unsure again because I will always come find you, no matter where you are,❞ she whispers breathlessly, her voice wobbling with tears. ❝And that, is a promise, Padfoot.❞
Clinging to Sirius as tightly as she is, Athena is well-aware that this is beyond anything she’s ever experienced to be considered any sort of mannerly. Then again, she and Sirius always have a sort of unique relationship ever since they first met in Hogwarts. A smart ass young man versus a young girl who’s out of place and trying to make her way in a culture unlike her own. Somehow, their snarky behavior turned into a competition and then, always fighting because they saw things differently. And it changed.
That sort of relationship changed her.
Their grip on one another loosens, not quite ready to release their touch that Athena sighs, taking a shaky breath when his hands slide from her shoulders down to just above the small of her back. Her hands relaxes, spreading her fingers to press her palms against his shoulder blades. Delicately cared for nails digs lightly into his back as she drags a hand from his back to his chest, taking another calming breath when he lightly his cheek against the crown of her head. She takes a hand to wipe at her tears, listening to his choked words that she blinks rapidly to stop the next wave of tears. A lump forms in her chest, her throat, laughing lightly at his teasing words at Moony’s expense.
❝I would like to believe he tried, but granted, you were quite occupied with your ‘prank’ as it were,❞ Athena says with an amused laugh. And her heart melts at Sirius’ laugh and she clenches her jaw, trying to take hold of the emotions that threaten to make her utterly lose her composure when she’s already lost it several times in the span of several minutes.
All these years, and yet, it seems her heart still stirs for this foolish and boyish man.
Athena pulls her head again from his cheek to look up at him, lifting a hand to touch his cheek. Her thumb runs along the neatly trimmed beard to under his eye. A sense of renewed purpose gleams bright in his eyes, but there’s something still amiss in those eyes that need healing, more time, and she knows that those haunted shadows would never truly fade.
She smiles, delighted at his choice of words that it sparks a look of mischief beyond the watery glint in her eyes. It shifts in colors, overwhelmed with emotion, and continues moving from varying shades of light pinks, purples, and blues. Even her hair seems to follow suit, the tint changing ever so slightly that it shows she is overwhelmed.
❝And I’m sure I would be delighted to meet the young man who’s made you become such a doting father.❞ And then her eyes sparkle, mischievous and delighted. Remus hasn’t stopped talking about how well Sirius has taken to his new role in life, both of them determined to make amends and love Harry as much as James and Lily had.
Her gaze softens, however, soon after as her thumb runs gently along his skin. ❝Oh, Padfoot, I’ve missed you.❞ Athena blinks, trying to keep a tight reign on her feelings. ❝Look at you, becoming a father, becoming Head of your House, and pulling such a brilliant prank on the Wizengamot.❞ Her chest aches, wanting more closeness, wanting more to bring him in so that he does not leave her again. But, does he still love her, after all these years?
❝Did you know, after all these years you were away, my heart ached for you? How I missed you when I could no longer hear you call my name? When you were no longer there—❞ To support her, to root for her, just as he did back when they were struggling to figure out a future for themselves. For them to laugh, to cry, and tease one another over foolish and stupid things that she can almost no longer remember. The little things that she’s taken for granted that left her hollow after all these years.
The isolation from her peers, her family, and the people who thought her foolish. He was her best friend, her partner, and her brilliant companion through all the mischief and fun in life. Her foolish and stupid best friend that made her realize just how lucky she was to have him.
Her hand trembles, pulling away at the idea that he might have other ideas. Maybe, they’ve become just that, best friends. Suddenly, all the confidence in the world seems to disappear whenever she’s in front of Sirius. For a moment, her unwavering love falters in a fractional moment of insecurity and she chokes back a sob, dropping her gaze at her confession. How stupid of her, she thinks, to think about her feelings and where she now fits into his world. Does she fit into it? Does he see her in this gleaming future?