Unloveable - Tumblr Posts
Problem
I am not looking for anyone at this point in time, and may never look for someone ever again.
But if there comes a time when I would like to have a someone again, I may be in a pickle. Who on earth would hear any of this and not run for the hills?
This was part of the plan I'm sure.
You know how a group chat works, there is always people who are closer together than the rest, there is new people that the rest of the gangs immediately fell in love with, and then there is this one person who doesn’t belong to any of those categories, we can’t be loved by them, we are too much to handle, and no one loves this. None of them signed up for this.
-me
morning dew/eternal blue
friendship is beautiful when it's just me and you, and we say we're dreaming of nothing in particular, yet of everyone too, what I don't tell you is I'm dreaming of you. I sit and pretend I don't whisper and wish and pray and hope someday you aren't just an aubade I sing about who disappears when I wake up, and I dream of us sitting on our lake and watching the sunrise, but when I snap a picture it wasn't real and I'm standing in the morning dew and you disappear back into my mind.
but I still sit and hope you'll be that angelic blue light that appears in candlelit rooms after dark, and I hope you open your soul to mine like I have to yours, I know why you act that way but I don't know if you even know yourself like that, you're too blind to the echo of your voice, you don't fully understand why you act so humane, and why you have so much forgiveness yet so much love disguised as hate in your heart, I know more about how you love everything then how I love you. but do you want to look at me like that? it doesn't seem like you want to when we're standing in the morning dew It sounds like you hate everything I do.
I'll still wait for you, you're not going anywhere but I think I'll wait a little longer until you disappear maybe when you're gone I'll tell you about everything but no one will listen because no matter how many times I can repeat my echo it doesn't matter if the room is empty and the party's over. but maybe one day I'll wake up next to you and you'll kiss me good morning and we'll live in a house in the small coastal town in New Jersey you always wanted, like your characters, like your writing, like all you've ever loved. and maybe one morning when the morning dew rises I'll be laying next to you, eternal blue, I'll be laughing about nothing in particular knowing you love me, and I love you too. (this will never happen, this will never happen, this will never happen)
