Tw Discussion Of Ableism - Tumblr Posts

literally tho

also if im being honest it's not just autism, like im autistic but i also hav a bunch of mental health stuff that also gets similar treatment 2 this like,,,

rando; "i hate it when ppl have intense emotions, why can't they just hav emotions at a 'normal' level of intensity like the rest of us, also i hate when ppl r clingy, also when it comes 2 emotions if some1 switches from 1 emotion 2 another 1 quickly then doesn't that just mean that they didn't actually really feel that emotion in the 1st place and they were just faking 4 attention? or at the very least if they did feel that emotion in the 1st place it clearly wasn't that big a deal if they got over it so quick also isn't that basically the same as emotionally abusing some1?"

me; "damn that sounds pretty ableist against people with borderline personality disorder"

rando; "actually it's ableist for you to imply that some1 having borderline personality disorder would do those things since those behaviours are obviously just bad and attention seeking and there's nothing to say that people with BPD can't just act 'normally' like everyone else"

me who hits the diagnostic criteria for BPD; "but i-"

rando; "also don't u hate it and think it's so cringe when people just end up basically becoming hermits and never leaving their house like omg go touch some grass already, i hope i never end up meeting a freak like that"

me; "well actually people with avoidant personality disorder might-"

rando; "honestly it just sounds like u just made that up bc ive never heard of it and also no disability would make some1 need 2 stay inside and away from ppl that much ur just being ableist"

me who hits nearly every symptom on the diagnostic criteria for AVPD; "no but the whole thing about that is-"

rando; "honestly i think you should try having more empathy i mean empathy really is the difference between being a good or bad person and also you should never lie to anyone and being selfish makes you inherently evil and any1 who doesn't feel bad abt hurting ppl in the 'right' way is a terrible person honestly and probably on their way to being a serial killer"

me who hits the diagnostic criteria for ASPD; "im not even gonna start with how ableist that is towards ppl with anti-social personality disorder because i know ur just gonna say every1 w/ ASPD is a serial killer or smth"

rando; "i mean yeah obviously"

rando 2; "actually some ppl w/ ASPD r able 2 b perfectly functioning members of society and don't hav any of those traits and acting like they do is kinda ableist but it's a common misconception"

me who knows that ASPD was a diagnosis created 4 ppl who struggle w/ morality in a way that is a disability and also has a lot of the 'bad people' traits of it and can't control that; ....so what it sounds like 2 me is u just want all disabled ppl 2 mask 24/7 so they fit into ur limit idea of what an acceptable person is and if they don't u either demonise them or call them cringe

there's honestly way more i could mention, like ppl getting annoyed abt ppl 4getting stuff but there's ppl who hav that as a symptom ect but these r just the 1s im seeing the most often lately that im the most mad abt rn

least favorite genre of tumblr discourse

"i hate people who have interests that are unusual in intensity or subject, who experience social difficulties that result in their saying and doing things that seem strange or inappropriate, or that prevent them from reaching expected cultural milestones like driving, having a steady job, or moving away from home, 'on time' or ever. those kinds of people are so cringe"

"oh that sounds pretty ableist against autistic people"

"*sputtering noise like the lady from the valentino white bag vine* how dare you imply that autistic people do those cringe things i just listed. that would make them losers and/or monsters, so by associating those behaviors with autistic people, maybe YOU'RE the real ableist. in fact, i'm autistic myself and all my interests are of socially appropriate intensity and i've never had trouble making a phone call and they just gave me the congressional medal of honor for understanding ironic social media jokes, and if i can do it so can everyone else"

can we please stop demonising alcoholism? it's literally just another form of addiction and we as a society really need 2 stop demonising addicts

(also b4 u try 2 call me a hypocrite im putting "discussion of alcoholism" and "discussion of addiction" under tw tags bc of the potential of discussions abt this 2 sometimes trigger addicts including alcoholics and if any1 reblogs this i would rather u do the same bc i don't want ppl reblogging my post without making it easy 4 ppl who hav addiction problems 2 filter out if they need 2 4 their mental health)

ok but as someone else who's housebound i honestly just get kinda annoyed whenever i see those posts, i always end up thinking "oh great another post abt how this thing i can't do except once in a blue moon is gonna fix all my problems w/out doing anything 2 acknowledge the reasons it's difficult 4 some of us 2 leave the house" idk i don't think it's fair 2 act like every housebound person has the same experience w/ these types of posts

like 4 me personally these types of post that r constantly glorifying going outside w/out any understanding of the systemic issues in place and how yes while it may sound absurd 2 some ppl 4 some of us it rly does effect our ability 2 just go outside 2 the corner shop or whatever it doesn't help and it just makes me annoyed that no1 is addressing those issues, i think 4 me that might b partly bc my housebound status is caused in big part by my neurological issues as well as my physical disabilities, i hav avoidant personality disorder (AVPD) and so going outside and being seen by ppl and having my existence acknowledged by others is already a struggle but it gets so much worse when u consider all the terrible details of most outside social interactions, im trans and currently being ghosted by my gender identity clinic and haven't been able 2 get any form of medical transition so if i go outside and interact w/ ppl im going 2 get misgendered, im physically disabled and need 2 use a wheelchair still 2 travel around outside but every time i use my wheelchair i get stared at and glared at by random ppl on the street which is a lot 4 me 2 deal w/ , im autistic and i hav ASPD but if i go outside and hav 2 interact w/ ppl all of them r likely gonna expect me 2 follow a bunch of unwritten social rules i don't understand which gets especially hard when my dissociation and psychosis kicks in and then i literally *can't* act "normal" anymore, 4 me personally the glorification i c when it comes 2 going outside is hurtful bc while yes i understand that in theory going outside is good 4 ppl's mental health ect that doesn't work when there's systemic issues in place (such as ableism) that mean that i and other ppl can't go outside w/out exposing ourselves 2 social interactions that r gonna make our mental health worse, bc those feelings of hurt 4 each microagression stack and it usually doesn't take long b4 i remember y i never leave the house, bc 4 some of us staying inside rly is just safer and 4 some of us going outside realistically is actually damaging 2 our mental health, i understand that theoretically going outside should b helpful 4 my mental health but unfortunately we live in a bigoted society

if some1 isn't personally effected by that stuff and going outside is actually beneficial 4 their mental health then good, im happy 4 them but i wouldn't say im "cheering non housebound ppl on" when i c these posts, i think ive earned the right 2 b bitter at this point

something that annoys me as a housebound person

so I've been housebound for three years now and just thought I'd share my views on Tumblr discourse that is about us but doesn't often include us. I've seen a few posts advocating the benefits of exercise and going outside for your mental health, which is really good because this. is a fact. exercise is GREAT for your mental and physical well-being. what annoys me is the tags and comments being full of people chattin bare shit like #erm this is abelist #what about the disabled people??? NO. this is not ableist and as a disabled person I'd like to make that clear. I'm grateful that you've thought of us but it would be nice if people could maybe consult us first before making assumptions. one of the hardest things about being housebound is NOT being able to go outside, exercise and have social interactions and lots of us struggle dreadfully because of it. in my opinion, people advocating going outside and doing some gentle exercise are helping others avoid this suffering and as someone who can't do that, I applaud them. keep up the good work.

TL/DR: go outside and do some exercise IF YOU CAN and spread the word! us housebound lot are cheering you on!

the Ken tumblr tag is not a safe space 4 oppressed men and that's a real problem (talking abt Ken from the Barbie movie)

i shouldn't b having 2 deal w/ most of the tag being either ppl acting like men can't b oppressed and r always oppressors or sexualising Ken in a rly fucked up and dehumanising way or making fun of Ken having emotions and his own struggles in the movie, none of u learned anything from Ken's story in the movie i hate it here, i hate how even now i feel like i need 2 make this post devoid of my own personal emotions 2 b taken seriously

Ken is a perfect analogy for being an oppressed man, the fact that he's a himbo makes him a good analogy 4 existing at the intersection of being a man and having some sort of cognitive/intellectual disabilities (speaking as some1 who has brain damage from a traumatic brain injury i suffered b4 i was a year old) and its present in the way the ppl around him treat him, he wants 2 leave Barbie's side for a little bit and she says "don't go 2 far" he wants 2 go 2 the library and she says "don't get in trouble" he's consistently seen as her accessory, the movie mentions how it's not fair that some women are expected 2 "mother" their male partner and that's true its not fair but it also SHOWS us that sometimes women push that onto oppressed men, Ken is very clearly upset when Barbie mothers him, getting upset when she tells him not 2 go 2 far or not 2 get into trouble like he's a child and it's also not fair that some women push that onto men (usually disabled men) and expect those men to just allow them to "mother" them and infantilise them and dehumanise them and then on top of that because of Ken being a man he is taught that the only way he can gain respect is by taking over and starting fights and wars

so yeah, genuinely fuck you guys for seeing a movie about how both men and women deserve better and then choosing to ignore half the message because you would rather get wasted on gender essentialist politics that tells you that women are always safe and men are always oppressors so you can make jokes about killing all men and traumatising all men because each man is the same to you, i am a disabled, gay, trans man of colour and i am so fucking sick of this shit and i genuinely thought i would be able to escape that in the Ken tumblr tag and just be able to see posts from ppl who get it since that's partly what the Barbie movie was about but no, because oppressed men can't have anything, in fact i'm probably gonna get a bunch of comments making fun of me for being emotional because u guys probably also think men shouldn't b allowed 2 hav feeling right?

hey so since this is officially my political rant blog now ig i may as well kick things off w the most unhinged political topics

we as a society need 2 hav a serious conversation abt the resale and rental of actual haunted houses, like im not talking abt haunted house attractions af fairs n shit i mean like homes where there were documented cases of murder ect that can potentially lead to hauntings

now while i do personally believe that ghosts exist i don't think this is a topic that u should need 2 believe in the existence of ghosts in order 2 talk abt, bc the issue isn't just if hauntings are or are not real the issue is how it's handled in our society

this can be broken down into 2 main points that i hav

1) we as a society need 2 respect the dead more and the families of those grieving

2) we as a society need 2 stop putting marginalised ppl in positions where the only place they can afford 2 live in is a place that was the site of a previous murder

so yeah once again proving that everything is political ig, let's take this point by point

part 1) we as a society need 2 respect the dead and the families of those grieving more than we currently do

so in how this relates to haunted homes we need 2 hav a serious conversation abt how some of these actual homes that ppl were horrifically murdered in can often get turned into tourist attractions, which feels incredibly disrespectful? like can u imagine if 1 of ur family members got violently murdered and then some mf came up and bought the place and charged ppl an entry fee 2 c the spot where the dude's body hit the ground? like bro.... how is this considered acceptable behaviour is my question, i feel like that's something that most people can agree is kinda messed up even if u don't believe in ghosts and if u do it's like..... bro just let them vibe in their own home? like they got murdered let them vibe omg

part 2) we as a society need 2 stop putting marginalised ppl in positions where the only place they can afford 2 live in is 1 of these haunted homes

now this is smth i hav more experience w bc i actually did, unknowingly, live somewhere that was considered a very well known haunted area 4 where i live, now im not gonna get 2 in detail bc i don't wanna dox myself but basically it was an old widows home that was built by this rich guy who was trying 2 make himself look good in the papers or whatever, this house was divided into multiple different flats [or apartments if ur american] and it was disabled living, which basically means that it was exclusively 4 disabled ppl, it was also a tourist attraction, also i was not told that it was a tourist attraction when i agreed 2 move in, i was also not told abt it being believed 2 b haunted

now even if u don't believe in hauntings, i think there's still a conversation 2 b had there abt the ethics of of that, the building was not acessible, i don't even know if it was up 2 code since it was built b4 there was a code 2 follow, so why was this specific building used as the building 4 disabled only housing?

there was basically no sound proofing, there was no bath tub, i had a shower that wasn't in a proper shower unit it was just attached 2 the wall of the bathroom, the floor was uneven, there were stairs but no stair lift and no elevator, the stairs were uneven stone stairs, i don't know why this place would be the one 4 disabled only housing unless it was intentional, bc no1 who could afford 2 not live there would live there, on top of that right, if this was disabled only housing what do u think that finding out that the place u live in is believed 2 b haunted does 2 some1 w paranoia? what do u think that does 2 some1 w psychosis?

and taking this outside of my own personal experiences, what abt the places that r places where ppl got murdered? how is whoever is putting this place up 4 rent making sure that there aren't any more murders? r they looking into what made that murder possible at that location? probably not

idk idk much abt how housing works so mayb some of u guys hav some more insight on this 1 than i do but i needed 2 rant ig

since this is my political blog u guys can interact w ur own political opinions on this topic ect but pls keep it respectful or u will b blocked, still not interested in hearing from any right-wingers, neo nazis, ect tho

political fandom opinion; billford edition

u guys realise when u say "bill was inherently abusive bc he's physically incapable abt caring abt ppl beyond what use he can get from them" that's an inherently ableist statement right?

u guys realise that when u make fun of ford 4 being paranoid ur being ableist right?

u guys realise that acting like bill needs 2 b abusive 4 ford's paranoia 2 b valid is inherently ableist and also just shitty and not how paranoia works right?

sucks bc i don't even dislike billford as a ship, i think it's rly interesting putting these fucked up lil guys under the microscope while i watch how they interact w each other, u guys r just doing it wrong

just 2 b clear im not even against ppl interpreting the ship as abusive bc of their opinions on stuff in the source material ect, i just can't stand it when ppl try 2 make it abusive or act like it's abusive just bc they r ableist

also don't ask me abt my own take on it bc i don't trust any of u guys enough 2 believe anything that i've seen online abt it so im waiting until i get a chance 2 read book of bill myself b4 i properly form an opinion on it

ok so idk jack shit abt ODD so idk anything abt what ppl r saying abt that specifically but im reblogging bc i needed 2 point out that im not a fan of how many ppl in the replies r saying "this is just a kid reacting 2 being in an abusive situation therefore it's not a disorder" like bro how do u think i developed ASPD?

idk man, just rubs me the wrong way that ppl assume that disorder = bad ig? like... tbh a lot of these symptoms remind me of me when i was younger and yeh that was me reacting 2 my situation as a kid and i now as an adult hav figured out i most likely hav ASPD and b4 some1 says "well if it was just u reacting 2 an abusive situation it shouldn't b classed as a disorder" c that's the thing im not in that situation anymore and it still is affecting me and it definitely is disabling 4 me

idk i think we just need 2 get rid of the idea that having a disorder is a person being bad and acknowledge that yes a kid just reacting 2 being abused in a typical way a kid would react 2 that can lead 2 having a disorder, tbh that's a pretty common cause of cluster b personality disorders but u guys wouldn't know that since ur 2 busy demonising us and pretending we're all abusers and serial killers

like okay if i were 2 do a break down of the symptoms of ODD:

- resentful, imma b real idk what this word even actually means so ignoring this

- easily annoyed, irritability can b an actual symptom of a few different things including anxiety and cluster b personality disorders

- argues w adults, this 1 is just sus af and i think the main thing ppl hav a problem w, like no karen lil timmy calling u out when u said some racist ass shit in ur history class is not him having a disorder

- loses temper, this is the same as easily annoyed, just say irritability

- blames others, shifting blame and inability 2 accept fault can b an actual disabling problem 4 some ppl, usually due 2 perfectionism and fear of not being good enough, this can become a problem that can however impact ability 2 function w others socially and also can affect omes sense of self worth in a sort of self fulfilling cycle thing (i can't afford 2 do wrong --> i did wrong but i can't acknowledge that bc that's terrifying and would make me bad in some way --> i hav 2 blame some1 else --> oh shit that was also me doing wrong --> i feel worse now --> ect)

- annoys ppl deliberately, yeh as some1 w ASPD this is basically just how i cope w being bored and how i make friends lol, getting into serious stuff tho (and this is smth i also do) it can also b a way of feeling more in control of a situation or 1s environment which could b potentially a symptom if its smth that they fall back on a lot of if it's their go 2 but mainly bc of it impacting social relationships ect and also the potential indication of paranoia

- defies rules or requests, so like i agree w the ppl who c this and say "so what? what r u a cop?" but also demand avoidance is a thing and so if it's a case of like they wanna do smth but they can't do it if it's asked of them bc it then feels like they r being controlled ect then yeah i can c that being a symptom but if it's just them not doing smth they don't wanna do then it could easily just b normal kid behaviour, could also b an inability 2 understand that doing smth they don't wanna do now would lead 2 a favourable result in the future tho, so like on it's own it could b completely benign but if it has specifics behind it it could b demand avoidance or inability of future planning, both of which can b disabling 4 the person

- spiteful, much like resentful im not even sure what this means, ppl just seem 2 throw this word around a lot 2 b shitty so im ignoring it bc wtf

so when we boil it down we hav

- irritability (but listed twice 4 some reason?)

- shifting blame (which could b a sign of perfectionism)

- annoys ppl deliberately (which could b a way of coping w boredom or a way of trying 2 gain some control over an environment in which they feel they don't hav control)

- demand avoidance (which is when u can't do a thing some1 asked u 2 do even if u actually want 2 do the thing) OR lack of future planning

so a lot of these symptoms line up w paranoia and specifically the feeling of being in an unsafe environment but acting in a way that could b disabling 4 the person that has it should this behaviour b consistent in a safer environment also no, school is not a "safer environment"

from what i can c it seems like the main argument ppl hav 4 pushing back on the idea of diagnosing a kid w smth (which im not saying ODD is a valid diagnosis btw, like i said idk jack shit abt it im just talking in general abt diagnosing w smth in general here) is "this is not the kid doing anything wrong" and "this is a result of environment" and "ppl r gonna treat the kid like shit bc of this" which like.... doesn't mean the kid doesn't hav a problem, it means that ur acknowledging that the kid isn't doing anything wrong and is reacting 2 their environment but u c a diagnosis as a punishment 4 "bad behaviour" idk, just rubs me the wrong way ig bc of ppl going "this is environment and the kid reacting in a way that is normal 2 react in an unsafe environment" but when i an adult w ASPD exist as some1 who developed ASPD from being a kid in an unsafe environment suddenly im apparently "serial killer coded" or whatever like... u know a kid can hav a disorder without it being that the kid did smth wrong right? and that it's fucked up in general that ppl w disorders r treated like they r doing smth wrong by having those disorders right?

I feel like ODD being an official disorder in the DSM should be the thing that makes everyone go “hm” about how psychology is practiced