Tua Marigold's Children - Tumblr Posts
Some TUA incorrect quotes about God
Spoilers s3 I think?
God: Jesus is the kid who made me want to have more kids.
God: Klaus is the kid who made me regret to had 43 more.
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Jesus: *die crucified* Hey mom, sorry I came home a little early.
God: Oh my sweet baby, don't worry I will give you a little add so you can say goodbye to your friends and then I will make cookies for when you came back :)
.
Klaus: *die* Sup' mom! I know you said I hadn't curfew but I'm here <3
God: I didn't say you hadn't curfew I said I disown you, get out of my house.
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God: Jesus! My sweet baby, I love you so much 🥺. You're such a good kid, I was so mad when humans killed you! Didn't the abilities I gave you were good enough? *sob* I want more kids, I'm sure they will be sweetheart like you. This time I'm gonna make them fucking badass so humans can't fuck up my babies >:(
*creates the Marigold's children*
*17 years later*
Half of them are dead or are claimed missing. 13 of them have been traumatized by Reggie. Five fucked up time and reality. Viktor caused the apocalypse directly or indirectly three times. Christopher is a cube. Klaus keeps dying and being a disrespectful little bitch.
God: What I have done...
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Klaus: Why don't you just let me in the afterlife! Are you homophobic >:( ?
God: I'm literally a lesbian you're just an asshole.
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God: Yes I love all my children equally. Jesus, Viktor, Five, Allison, /insert all the names of the Marigold's children/ and *reading the palm of her hand* Klovs...
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Dave: *arriving in the afterlife* Hum, hello, are you God?
God: Since you're weird enough for falling in love with the ghosty bitch I don't know if it's a good idea of letting you in.
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God "I created you so I can choose what I love or not": Yes I'm the superior being of life. An entity full of love and mercy.
Klaus: Hi.
God: Except for you.
Where is my TUA's fic where Jesus "if you're offended by how she dresses well look away" is the nice but sassy big brother of the Marigold's children and tries to put some sense in them or simply being an healthy support ?
Like manifesting in Five and Luther's dreams when they were alone in the Apocalypse/on the Moon for chatting with them so they don't feel abandoned.
Being the literal guardian angel of Claire so Allison can get a break with peace in her mind.
Secretly multiplying food in Diego's cupboard when he forgot to go shopping after a rough week of vigilant activities.
Blessing every water Ben touchs when he was alive because it will calm down The Horror and he want to help his little brother feel better.
Manifesting to Klaus like a ghost for big brothered him with Ben. "You need to eat Klaus.
-I ate two hours ago!
-You need VEGETABLES not smarties!" And also scaring the bad souls so they let him alone.
And convincing the souls of dead famous violinists to manifest in Viktor's dreams for helping him with the new piece he's working on.
WHERE IS IT DUH?
Parenthesis
My theory for the TUA's canon is that Reggie created the Marigold's children
BUT
As a headcanon I like the idea of God created them when she was in a nostalgic mood (because Jesus was so good how it can possibly go wrong?), I made some incorrect quotes for that. Tired Parent God and Big Brother Jesus is my confort au ok ?