This Could Be A Whole Statement - Tumblr Posts
spiral!jon who starts to manifest after you get a promotion at work. he stars in the training tapes for your new position, with curly salt-and-pepper hair that shift and coils as if it is growing but never gains any length. he speaks with a faux confidence that fools you at first, but soon you pick up on the fidgeting of his fingers and how his eyes dart around and suddenly you realize he’s not supposed to be here. and not just that — he knows that he’s not supposed to be here.
he doesn’t say anything strange at first. but after you’ve started to pick up on the sense that something is wrong he starts littering in phrases amongst the training talk — phrases that send the message that you’re a fraud, too. he uses that word. fraud? you think angrily. i’m not a fraud! but then he begins to remind you of every mistake you’ve ever made on the clock and the first seeds of doubt are sewn.
but not to worry. he’s here to help you. more so, he’s here to warn you.
you ask your training manager if this is a joke. she just looks confused.
he’s in your new manual, too. or, well, it’s not like there are any pictures of him in there, but the words are all wrong. the pages are peppered with strange phrases that are far too specific to be a coincidence, even going so far as to name drop a few of your coworkers who would benefit from the position the promotion has put you in. what about dylan, the single father? amber, the fresh college graduate desperate to prove herself in the field? is this man trying to warn you of them? are they out to get you? should you say something to them?
still, that’s not the end of it. there are cheesy motivational posters all around your office. the tacky slogans no longer encourage hard work and perseverance, now only encouraging a sense of fear and paranoia in you.
“what would they do for a chance at your spot?”
when you ask a coworker why management thought putting them up would be a good idea, they have no idea what you’re talking about.
when you’re out running errands, you notice a man at a bus stop. you almost pass him by at first, but dread settles in your stomach when you realize he’s the man from your training videos. the one who is, supposedly, trying to warn you. you decide to approach him, ask what his deal is, what he knows that you don’t, demand that he reveal to you whether this is all just some weird prank or hazing ritual your coworkers paid him for. but he doesn’t know what you’re talking about.
but insists not to know you. he even seems scared of you and your outburst. and he’s…probably right to feel that way. you’re being ridiculous. embarrassed, you apologize, tell him you mistook him for someone else. but that night as you lay in bed you still can’t shake the strange smile that appeared on his face when he said he forgave you, or the way his curls moved in the wind though there wasn’t any breeze.