|| Sins Of The Mother || - Tumblr Posts - Page 2

Sighing, Nonou gently removed the leather-bound notebook from Kabuto's grasp and flipped through the smudged, tear-stained pages; her mind swimming with memories. Still trying to catch her breath, she looked at Kabuto wearily.

"As I'm sure you're aware, Danzo had promised to let you return home on the condition I complete one last mission for him. Instead, he sent me a near-perfect replication of you; perhaps even some poor soul who had been brainwashed into thinking they were actually <i>you </i>. I'd always felt there was something <i>not quite right</i>, but I kept it to myself and assumed you were growing up. Then... I... There was that horrible fire, and-and I thought you died." She said, pinching the bridge of her nose in exhaustion. The silent, gloomy atmosphere of the cemetery was beginning to get to her.

"I... I wrote letters to you daily as a way of feeling like the earthly connection between us had not been cut. I suppose if you wanted to know all of the secrets I never told you, they would be in there as well. When I realized you were still alive I... I spent three months in shock." She whispered hoarsely, a small lump beginning to form in her throat.

Holding the notebook in her hands, Nonou gazed into distance with a faraway look in her eye. "Yes, I suppose it's funny, isn't it. Mortals toil and attempt to retain control over their lives, and God laughs at them with a serpentine smile."

Calling him left alone in his thoughts implied there was much of anything going through his mind. It hurt, feeling like he couldn’t be there more for her, rendered useless by his own inability to process anything. Because the place was  graveyard in every sense. Rows of bodies lay forgotten and uncared for, children only lost, never found, of the selves they were back when either of them had any hope of leading normal lives. He didn’t look at the names passing them. He was terrified of recognizing anyone.

It almost came as a relief when she collapsed again and attentions were brought back to worrying over her figure, a complaint on his lips as dark eyes fall on the stone in front of them. And still he felt only an aching nothingness. He couldn’t give anything more; to feel would allow paranoia and fear into his mind that even now crept into the corners of his vision and he tightened the hand on Nonou’s back to assure himself of his own flesh and bone existence. Despite the name and the place, the way she wept as though over his own grave, it wasn’t him. He was more than a ghost. He could do something to try and ease her suffering.

A hand rubbed her back until she seemed to breath easier. ‘ We both mourned each other, and both ended up being alive. It’s almost funny. ‘ The comment came, quiet in the silence that filled the air after her coughing settled. He didn’t know what else to say, what else to offer. They both had lived in anguish over their mistakes and it was all for nothing.

And he did notice the little, leather bound book when his foot knocked it away. Attentions were drawn from Nonou for just long enough to reach down, brows furrowed. A glance revealed her own handwriting and – his name, it caught his eye over and over. His stomach sank. ‘ What..what is this? ‘

Kabuto's poor attempt at humor was enough to cut through the gloomy atmosphere surrounding them; Nonou laughed, almost uncontrollably. It was a release of the pent-up tension which had been steadily building over the past few days; locking her spiralling mind in a vice grip. Suddenly, she fell to her hands and knees; shrill laughter turning into a coughing fit so intense, her eyes blurred as blood and bile was wrenched from her searing throat. Perhaps laughter really wasn't the best medicine after all.

It was achingly clear to Nonou that she was running out of time, and she needed to get inside the abandoned shelter right now. Slowly, pale and weak, she stood up. Gently grabbing Kabuto by the hand, she led him down a hidden, rocky path; eyes scanning for a rusted metal hatch in the ground. It was beginning to grow darker, and the cemetery had grown eerily silent. Only the sound of dead leaves crunching beneath the heels of their boots could be heard. "I don't think I would have shown you any of those letters anyway, not if I could have helped it. They're only memories of a distant, forgotten, era. There's no sense wallowing in it." Nonou murmured, trying to ignore the silent atmosphere which was beginning to play tricks on her mind.

Finally, they found it buried beneath a patch of dying grass and overgrown weeds. Nonou gazed at it cautiously. "I didn't only come here to reminisce, Kabuto. The night of the fire, Danzo had his underlings spray the perimeter with a new chemical they had invented, designed for biological warfare. I breathed it in, and now the infection in my body is slowly spreading." Nonou explained, adjusting her glasses. "This...wasn't a nice place after you left. It was less of an orphanage, and more of a cruel sanctuary for Danzo to contain his experiments. But I'm sure you're aware the Leaf Village isn't as benevolent as they would have us all believe."

Wearily, unsteadily, Nonou pulled open the rusted iron hatch with a loud grunt. "I have to know what Danzo was keeping locked away down here like a dark secret; the image of this shelter has plagued my dreams for years, but I was too much of a coward to find out."

"I couldn't protect my children, I couldn't keep them safe from that monster. I... I was his research assistant, and I can't face the vile sins I've committed. I thought... I could ease their pain, if only a little bit, if I was the one to care for them; to torture them..."

Feeling faint, Nonou leaned against Kabuto; her mind desperately trying not to splinter. Above all else, she hoped God would forgive her for the awful things she had done in the name of nationalism and "progress."

A black abyss loomed ominously below, with a steel ladder designed to guide their descent into Hell, and Nonou's worst nightmare.

Not only did the person modeled after him keep up the role, but he physically replaced him. That was a comforting thought that didn’t trigger any paranoia in his idiot brain at all. He doesn’t comment on that, opting to just, look back at her and pour energy into not letting each anxiety-riddled thought pour into his mind. 

Even when he did speak, it was only to murmur, ‘ I’m glad I didn’t read too carefully, then. ‘ Whoever she’d written letters too was long dead, still, wasn’t he? Just as the letters he’d written to her, only to end up torn in the trash, were meant for someone fake. An idealized image from his childhood, selfish and unrealistic. They’d both been fucked over and chose to believe in memories. He thought that was fair, even if this was where it got them. 

But he had one thing, if nothing else, one person to go with his awful sense of humor. ‘ Your god has a serpent’s smile, too? ‘ he asked, impulsive response to try and make some kind of light of the mood. Except he realized she definitely wouldn’t find that funny. Kabtuo cleared his throat, looking away to avoid her gaze. ‘ I mean - ah, I, sent you letters too, actually. That’s almost funnier. They all ended in the trash, though. ‘ 

His back straightened after that, offering a hand to her, focused on how exhausted and pale she looked now. ‘ Can we go, yet? There’s a hideout not far from here, I could take you there and at least get you resting.. ‘