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endless pt. 2- naruto uzumaki 

warnings: cheating ment., pregnancy, angst still no happy ending, timeskip, things are rough for our boy rip, oh and some smut!! be forwarned. its just a flashback but still 

length: 6k 

a/n: commission for @dark-pinku that took WAY TOO LONG my deepest apologies. everything has been on the backend for the last few weeks because of the end of the semester + my grandad is really sick right now. i wanted this fic to be up to standard and it wasn’t happening but im finally at a point that i think it’s good and right. i apologize for the delay but i hope you enjoy! 

italics for flashback as usual. 

read part 1 here! 

It is a truly desolate feeling. 

Loneliness is, at least. It’s hard to stomach the feeling being alone, the realization that in a world filled with people, you are still left with nothing and no one. It’s a painful feeling, full of solace and anger. You learn loneliness only when you are surrounded by others, of which who pay you no mind. It’s the first feeling Naruto had every learned in his life. 

Naruto’s loneliness is not like a fire, but still water. For the first years of his life, there was no one there to pull him out of the warmth. He neither knew love, nor happiness, nor joy. As soon as he was able to walk freely, he was set free to a village who would only turn their back on him and a life that could’ve so easily gone awry. It almost feels like he was destined to hurt. That suffering was more than innate, but inevitable. 

He got adjusted to loneliness, but a child with so much love, never really learns to let go. When Naruto meets you for the first time - he didn’t know you were more antidote than girl. More lifeline than conceivable. No matter who or what came across you, you stuck to Naruto’s side. Asked him to protect you, just like you always believed he could. You cured Naruto’s loneliness in the midst of curing your own. 

Naruto never knew that you would the cure. That your smile would effect him so permanently that two decades later and he still finds him in the beautiful sound of your laughter. Laughter that hasn’t grown or matured, but only creeped more familiarly inside of him.

It’s difficult to put the pieces together in the days following your encounter. Why Naruto can’t seem to find it in himself to feel as much remorse as he should be feeling. You linger everywhere around him - the sweet smell of your body wash clinging onto his collars like an untouchable vice. Every moment afterwards, after it - seems so inescapable. 

From traveling down the hotel hallways, catching his own gaze in the reflection and seeing scratch marks and bruises littered against his back, to the elevator ride down where the music playing sounds like a tune you might hum. The drive back to his own place is just as gruesome, just as thick with your existence as everything else. He should be suffocated by the feeling, accustomed to feeling that way after a night with Hinata or likewise. He normally needs some time off, away from everyone to recuperate then. 

So why isn’t it that way with you, he finds himself wondering the whole way home. On the train ride back, when he leans his head against the windows and shuts his eyes - he isn’t trying to forget what happened. He isn’t even trying to pretend it didn’t. His remorse is a labyrinth of misinformation and cans of warms now opened and spilled. All of him - mind, body, and soul, are itching to be involved with you. 

You’re not there anymore. The days have passed and his on his way home and nows about the time he should be swallowing down bile with realization that he did something so terrible to someone who’s only ever given him love. He should feel pain for that person. He should. 

But he doesn’t. Instead, the nerves on his skin are wistfully burning the fire in his belly - craving your touch with unceremonious need. Like unlocking Pandora Box, and burying his aches in there. You are simply the medicine - the cure to Naruto’s loneliness in a way he could’ve never truly understood. 

He’s know - his whole fucking life, that he loved you more than he’s ever loved anything else. Now that the taste of your love has filled the empty space of his mouth, kissed and licked all the wounds of his memories, and your teeth have ripped out the heartbeat of his sorrow, he doesn’t know how to deal with this feeling. 

How could something objectively wrong feel so good? Feel so sound and secure? He has no idea, in all truth. How do you abandon the medicine that has healed the sickness of love you had carried your whole life? 

Keep reading

Here’s Part.2

Worthy of a re-reblog again because I love, love it 🥰

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endless - naruto uzumaki 

warnings/fic tags: mutual pining, cheating, smut implied but nothing graphic, angst no happy ending. literally pure pain djksdkj. 

length: 3.9k (im nuts im so sorry) 

a/n: this is a comission from @dark-pinku !! i went well over the agreed word count so i hope thats okay!!. it’s still 10/10 for me so happy birthday mr. uzumaki sir!!!! i love u sorry for breaking ur heart <3 

italics is flashback!! u know the drill. also cheating is wrong and bad i dont condone it etc etc. 

plot: naruto has always been your best friend. with a single mother and too much freedom - you cherishes naruto with reckless abandon. and when you come to learn just what it means to love naruto uzumaki, you learn that you should maybe learn to be more reckless.

The rain outside is heavy.  

When you open your eyes again, you’re a few feet away from him - cerulean eyes look at you with curiosity as you take shelter from the weather, beating down the wood rhythmically. Wordlessly, you drag your knees to your chest, your clothes are covered in grass stains and otherwise as you squish your cheek against your knee. Without hesitation, he reaches out and brushes his fingers against yours. At 6 years old, you are awfully afraid of the rainy weather - your mom always told you that if you stay outside during it something would come get you. 

You’re too young to know it’s just her way of keeping you from the cold. Its one of many ways she’s learned to manage the uncertainty of leaving you alone while she works. 

He knows you, maybe even better than you know yourself, so he reaches out for your hands with stubby fingers that match yours. You look at Naruto, who grins with pride - a bandage is laid across two different parts of his face. You put them on him, having learned the lesson long before to keep them tucked in the pocket of your overalls. He looks brave. You also happen to know that he is brave, so when he reaches for your nervous hands, you take it. 

“I hate the rain,” you mumble against your clothed pant leg. Naruto scoots closer to you, bridging the gap that seemed to grow wider with the shake of thunder. You unfold yourself, your knees touching as you sit criss-cross across from each other. 

He hugs you as tight as he can, suddenly. It is the first time in the 6 years you’ve been alive that you’ve had the air knocked out of you like this. 

“I’ll protect you forever, Y/N-chan,” he promises you “So don’t worry,” 

Your grip is weak when you hug him back, letting frustrated tears fall on his shoulder as he waits out with you in the little shelter you both just barely fit in. 

“Promise?,” 

He nods, confident. 

“Promise,” 

You know you love Naruto Uzumaki as early as 6 years old. You still can’t be sure if this revelation is a curse of a blessing, so you choose to see it as neither. Naruto has always taught you lessons you never thought you’d have to learn. From how to make cup ramen to how to wash your clothes without wasting too much detergent and soap. Naruto had always learned everything he knew by himself, but never fussed about teaching you. 

You think it’s just in his nature, his uncomplicated drive and easy resolve. Naruto had always been chasing one dream, but more than that - Naruto had only ever really wanted one thing. It was to be acknowledged by the people who once looked down on him. It was his life force, what turned his will into his way later on in his life. He would chase and chase and chase his aspirations until he was down to bone and dust.

Naruto was much like Icarus, chasing the daylight even when his wings would get singed. But you, unlike everyone else, have learned better than to try to pull him away. It’s why there’s always a bandage in your pockets. It’s why you fall into everything sure someone with a set of wings will come and pick you up. 

You’ve always loved Naruto Uzumaki. Ever since you were old enough to understand that the word love is simply another word for cherish - and to be most accurate, you cherished Naruto Uzumaki and his presence more than most things. You had always wanted to stick closely by his side, if the universe allowed.  As time continues to clumsily fall through your fingertips like the sand in an hourglass, your admiration for the blonde continued to light a fire in you. You watched him in his every step. 

You stood sturdy by his side through everything. He knocked at your door when he passed the ninja exams and had dinner with you and your mom to celebrate. You were the person he cried to when Sasuke leaves. You watched as he cut himself down with the heaviness of his own expectations and held his hand through each and every moment. When Naruto breaks, you sit besides the pieces and put him back together. 

Because he was so unabashedly your best friend and he deserved nothing less. Because with your whole heart, you love and cherish Naruto Uzumaki. 

Keep reading

Commissioned a cute sketch from @arryadne of Amaya as her childish self and I'm both, "aww! Look at this inquisite, cute little girl!" and "I'm sorry for what I'll be putting you through 😭"

She's the OC (as her childish self) who I envisioned in botb Endless and Red String, the latter being my Naruto fanfic.

Received my 4th commission from @oliveiralarissapinha ! This is one of the two pieces I commissioned artists to use the concept of the red string of fate for my fanfic Red String and I'm definitely pleased by the contrast on the end of each thread/ribbon. So fitting!

Received my 5th commission from @teamunee ! I'm happy that I can officially share her final form 😆 but I love it! Her name is Amaya, my OC for my Naruto fanfic 'Red String'.

Received my 6th commission from @/evokstudios from Twitter! And let me just start off by saying I either go big or small when it comes to feeding my interests, so I'm immensely HAPPY with this piece! Once again, this is fanart based off my fanfic 'Red String' with Amaya and Naruto sharing an intimate moment. Contrary to what you're seeing here, one of them is in denial to what she's feeling 🙈

Here's the 7th piece I commissioned @/forevermedhok from Twitter! And I'm absolutely in awe by how CUTE this piece came out!

Fanart based off my Naruto fic 'Red String'. Featuring Amaya and her new BFF Naruto.

Received my 8th commission, this coming from @/hikage_chiaki from Twitter depicting another concept for Red String. Their expressions, the overall image mood, PERFECTION!

This is a piece of fanart for my story Red String.

Safe to say that while I'm not that far advanced in my AoT fanfic, Inure, I still know what it will be dealing as a subplot. This is my commission from @/seraexecfia from twitter.

In this piece, Isadora is tied to the red ribbon - fate itself as well as to a person. With the white ribbon it symbolizes what she wants, hence her holding it tightly.

This piece of fanart is a mini-series I've started called Ribbons.