Connections - Tumblr Posts

It feels so good outside tonight. I hope some of my fellow Tumblr users are looking at the moon like I am right now. It's such an amazing and special thought. That thousands of miles can seperate us all. But our line of sight meets upon this one beautiful thing in our universe. What a comforting thought I believe..

1, 13. “cut,” catherine lacey / 2. seven, taylor swift / 3. mouthful of forevers, clementine von radics / 4, 9. succession: s3, ep9 / 5. “first memory,” louise glück / 6. @heavensghost / 7. @heavensghost (sharp objects, gillian flynn x painting by aleksandra waliszewska) / 8. succession: s4, ep8 / 10. succession: s4, ep9 / 11. twitter user @transtenjou / 12. succession: s4, ep10

on angry fathers, wounded daughters, and the cycle of patriarchal trauma (“there will always be an angry man in your house”) ❤️‍🩹

FuuuuUUUUUCCCKKK

One of my clients is someone he used to work with. They've kept in touch. Dan doesn't keep friends very well, but they're friendsish.

This very vague and loose connection was irksome at first, as my ex could have used him to attempt to fish for information about me. I've relaxed a lot since then he's always remained focused on the business and never asked any probing or suspicious questions. All of the information he had access to was stuff my ex already knew, so no additional risk.

Well.

I stopped by his house to pick up some documents today and there's a person i know from my theatre group sitting on his couch. They met on Bumble and have been dating for 6 months.

We're not best friends or anything, but she's on my Facebook and has seen pics of me and my woman together. She knows I've moved just outside of my city. She knows I'm involved in a theatre production right now. She knows things that could trickle down to my ex through my client that would give him more information.

She may even say something off hand that would be damning. Like how I'm queer. I have no idea how he would react to news like that, but I'd bet money it wouldn't be good.

No longer a low risk connection. And I'm fucking LOSING IT. AGAIN.

This chapter was so good. It was definitely emotional and got me in my feels. I just love seeing the MC and Yoongi's relationship and how comforting it is.

Fear and Dumplings: Chapter Seventeen

Confronting your fears for a final grade sounds unappealing but, with Yoongi as your partner, things might not be so bad.

Summary: You’re in your final semester at University when your Abnormal Psychology professor assigns you a partnered project surrounding your greatest fears. Lucky for you, your partner just so happens to be a cute boy named Min Yoongi.

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader

Genre: Underground Rapper! Yoongi, Soft!!! Yoongi, Fluff!!!, College! Yoongi, Sub! Yoongi

Word Count: 9.1k

A/N: Hi friends! Here is a new chapter for you. I know it’s been a super duper long time since I’ve updated this series but, I plan on wrapping up the current timeline (wink wink) within the first half of the year! Special shoutout to my amazing friend @bulletproofbirdy​ who I love so so much. Without her big genius brain, I would literally not be able to get through any of my wip. Another huge shoutout to @gldnrecs​ @kithtaehyung​ @yoonia​ and @randombtsprincessa​ for being my lil hype team. I love you! Also, thank you to everyone over at @bangtansorciere​. I am so grateful to have met so many lovely new friends this year! okiii bye. I hope you like it!

NOTE: all bolded words indicate when characters are speaking Korean

Warnings for this Chapter: ok here we go…(TRIGGER WARNING)

moderate angst, drug use (marijuana), mentions of anxiety, brief allusions to physical abuse, very brief allusions to drug addiction, alcohol 

Chapter Seventeen: Daegu and Dirty Laundry

No thoughts, head empty (and in Yoongi’s lap)

The two of you are in his living room, bags packed by the front door, awaiting the cab to take you to the airport.  

In a few short hours, you were leaving on a plane to Daegu to visit Yoongi’s older brother and, you can tell by the way he’s shuffled around all morning that he’s anxious.  

Thankfully, Hoseok and Namjoon woke up with him, knowing that emotions would be high and well- offered to get him high.

“This is a really good indica strain hyung,” Hoseok assures him as he hands over a zip-lock bag, “I rolled a joint with this last night and passed out in like 30 minutes.”

Yoongi, dressed in an all-black sweat outfit, accepts the bag into the palm of his hand, before grabbing the pipe that’s resting on the couch cushion beside him.

“Did you get it from that same guy?” Yoongi asks, his voice heavy beneath the obvious tension he’s feeling.

Despite his attempts to remain casual, you know him well enough to feel how nervous he is. He’s practically vibrating beneath you but, you know that pointing this out will only make it worse so instead, you merely rub the outside of his thigh whilst he packs his pipe. 

Keep reading

This has probably already been pointed out before, but Holly from Stranger Things looks just like Gertie from E.T. (both little sisters with a brother named MICHAEL, although Gertie also has a brother named Elliot (main character) and Holly also has a sister named Nancy)

Gertie wears this when she says goodbye to E.T., Holly is dressed like this when she's following the flickering lights and almost gets caught by the demogorgon through the wall in the episode titled "Holly Jolly."

Got PERFECT on connections today 😋

i think one of the most important things you learn about making connections with others is that a significant portion of the time people just do not know theyre doing what theyre doing

So now that I have calmed down from my minor mental breakdown I can be articulate.

One...issue I've encountered in my quest to make friends is the disconnect between my connection to other people and my perceived their connection to me.

From my perspective these people mean a lot. I don't really have any super close friends, so anyone I connect with is super significant I'm my life. But other people have those close people, so my meaning in their life is much different. It also feels very uncomfortable as I feel more connected to these new people than to people I've hung around with for years. And because I don't have anyone who I feel super close to, I can't talk to anyone about these things and they just keep building and building.

It's also just been sad. I'm having all these new experiences and I can't share them because there's no one to share it with.

every author's dream !!!

do you ever feel victimized by fanfic authors when you make them fanart and then they give YOU compliments and you try to give THEM compliments and its a vicious cycle??? ♥♥ ft. @nicolareed

It's nice to meet you! Welcome to writblr

Mythology fan right here! That's so awesome that you know so many languages? What languages are they? And I love what you're learning right now haha. If you ever want to give me a crash course, I'd accept it willingly.

What kind of books do you like to read, and what's on your tbr right now? TEA. So good. Literally the best thing in the world. Though I have to have my tea cold haha, I'm not good with warm drinks.

What are you working on? What genre do you like to write? How is Creative Writing? Are you a plotter or a pantser?

So many questions already haha <3

INTRODUCING ME

Hey there! I’m new here and I wanted to introduce myself to all of you so you can know a little bit about me.

Keep reading

Conflicting Ship Plots

they are competitors - the same job, the same championship, etc.

they are straight-up enemies - one them wants to buy the land to build a resort, and the other wants it to get turned into a nature sanctuary. one is a defense attorney, and the other is a prosecutor. they’re soldiers on opposing sides of the war, etc.

they already won - they inherited an estate that should have been the other’s, or one got the job that the other was hoping to be promoted into, and they are seething.

they broke their heart in the past - maybe there was a good reason behind it, or maybe they were an idiot then and realize it now. 

they did the other wrong in the past - maybe they wronged the other’s family member or friend. 

they have has trust issues - their last relationship ended in a terrible betrayal.

they have intimacy issues - maybe because of a traumatic past, they feel too vulnerable if anyone knows about their real emotions or weaknesses. maybe they’re a psychic, a behavioral expert, or just the one person who can see right through the other and it makes them uncomfortable as hell.

they don’t trust their dating choices - they’ve gotten involved with several losers in a row, and they’re taking a break, maybe a permanent one.

they believe no one can truly love them - they made a terrible mistake in the past, or they’re not attractive in the conventional manner.

they are good friends - they don’t want to risk ruining their friendship by taking it to the next level.

they are co-workers - they don’t want to make things weird at the office, restaurant, or wherever they both work.

they are freaked out by who they really are - a werewolf, vampire, ex-con, spy, etc.

it was supposed to be sex only - they were going to be friends with benefits, or maybe one of them is an escort. falling in love goes against the original arrangement.

their love was supposed to be fake - they were pretending to be in love or married, or they entered a marriage of convenience. 

they were faking it at first - they made a bet that they could bed the other, or pretended to like the other so they could learn their darkest secrets.

they have moral qualms - one of them is the other’s boss, their teacher, their captor, ex-girlfriend or their best friend, and that gives them pause.

they are struggling with personal issues - one of them is grieving the death of their significant other, best friend, their child, or they have PTSD from battle or some other terrible experience.

their love is forbidden by others - it’s against the rules, spoken or unspoken, of their family, organization, community, or religion.

they are into something that the other doesn’t like - it could be an addiction, like alcohol, drugs, gambling, or a profession, like boxing or defending corrupt clients in court. whatever it is, the other wants no part of it.

their cultures clash - one of them is a rock-n-roller and the other is a  business executive, or they love the city life and the other is all about small-town living.

one of them is promised to someone else - maybe the wedding’s already planned and everything. they might have reasons for going through with a loveless marriage.

one of them is married to someone else - it is some weird legal, not-consummated arrangement, or the other ran away long ago because their spouse was an abusive asshole.

they are infatuated with someone else instead of them - they don’t realize yet that this other person is awful.

they are interested in someone else in addition to them - they’re having trouble making a decision on who to be with.

their time is together is limited - one of them is going abroad to study in the fall, their work visa is almost up, or one of them is about to go on a space mission to another planet, never to return.

being together would require a big sacrifice - one of them would have to say no to their dream job or they would have to move away from their family.

they are a danger to the other’s safety - they’re a spy, vampire, drug lord, gang leader, etc.

they think they’ll only make the other unhappy - they’re dying of a disease, suffering under a curse, can’t have children, etc.

they are a suspect - in a murder or robbery case.

they have a reputation - a materialistic douche, a heartless womanizer, a stone cold killer, etc.

they have terrible first impressions of one another - they might have gotten off to an awful start by arguing over something.

they love their freedom - they always saw themselves as the carefree type who would never settle down.

they don’t want distractions - one of them has a very important job to do, and they can’t afford to get sidetracked.

 Grey characters are infinitely more interesting (and real) than one-dimensional goodguys and badguys. Everyone has at least a touch of villainy in them, and no one is purely malicious.

 Good guys sometimes sacrifice others for their own gain, to further their goal of helping others. Bad guys do the same.

 Bad guys do what they must to protect their families, even if it means killing others. Good guys do the same.

your muse is allowed to underestimate my muse 

your muse is allowed to disrespect my muse

your muse is allowed to provoke my muse

your muse is allowed to be a little asshole to my muse

and more – !!

So long as you, the mun, understand the consequences of your muse ticking off my muse your muse is allowed to be not nice to mine. Confrontation can be interesting and fun to rp! I welcome it! While you, the mun, should know better than to provoke my muse your muse might not and that’s okay! Mun does not equal muse and vice versa. When your muse provokes mine, disrespects mine, underestimates mine, I am trusting that even if your muse doesn’t know the consequences that you, the other mun, understand there are repercussions for your muse being an asshole.

you want your muse to be an ass to mine? that’s fine – just don’t whine when your muse doesn’t come out of it unscathed. 

Writing Slow-Burn Romances

@not-the-girl-u-think​ said:

Hey Abby! Any tips for a slow burn romance??

Let’s start with a little thingy first: slow-burns, when done well, are my favorite thing to read. I love the suspense that comes with them, that feeling when you know they’re going to get to together but you’re on the edge of your seat wondering if it’ll happen anyway. That stuff melts my heart, so I’m really, really happy that you sent this.

What is a slow-burn?

Slow-burns are great because they work both as a main or a subplot. They’re extremely character-oriented romances that take a while (usually an entire book or, in some cases, an entire series) to develop. Oh, and they have a talent for making people like me freak out over every little detail.

From a writer’s perspective, a slow-burn is a pain in the neck. You want everything to go at the right pace with the right chemistry enough that it seems like everything happens naturally. You don’t want things to go too slow or too fast, but you don’t want the reader to be rushed or bored either. Two characters are needed that would making a slow-burn seem worth it to pursue, and there lies the issue.

Creating the Chemistry

This part of the post is going to build pretty heavily on this post about writing believable romances. As you’ve (hopefully) guessed, your main goal for creating a successful slow-burn should be to achieve realism. Creating chemistry between characters is a balance of everything you’ve learned about writing romance.

In order for two (or more) characters to have good chemistry, they have to be compatible. One of the biggest giveaways of an under-developed romance is seeing two characters forced together when you know it wouldn’t happen in real life. When I say “balance”, what I mean is this: your characters can’t only have traits that fit well together, but they also can’t be constantly conflicting. 

People tend to like a challenge, so if their partner or partners just go along with everything they say it won’t become so much fun. However, constantly having to fight against the person/people you’re supposed to be with is physically and mentally exhausting. Once you get to this point, it’s easy to question whether this relationship is worth it.

This balance that you achieve is especially important because it’s one you’re going to be working with all throughout the development of this relationship. If there’s a trait you’re not necessarily “good” at writing, practice is going to be your best friend. You’ll need to know how their traits go together, where they clash and where they blend and where they don’t really act the way someone would expect.

The Relationship “Basis”

A slow-burn, as you know, doesn’t just happen. There are precursors, usually with them starting off as friends or a friend of a friend. Something was there first, and whatever this “something” was will have a pretty large effect on their current relationship.

If they were previously best friends, they’re probably already comfortable with each other. Depending on the length and depth of their friendship, taking it to a romantic level might not change anything other than the addition of kissing and… other activities.

If the previous relationship was based on a mutual dependency, depending on their personalities they might become more less dependent on each other. They might go out and learn/try new things together and use the codependency to help each other out, or they might make an effort to get a little more independent so they’re not constantly relying on each other.

You’ll want to consider how they met in the first place, and why they started talking in the first place. Was it a funny joke, a chance meeting on a vacation, something like tutoring at first? This basis will be the precedent for the relationship, and in my opinion it’s too important to be forgotten about.

Hinting at a Romance

Romance between people happens in weird ways. Sometimes someone points it out or sometimes it happens like in that one Tumblr post where one little thing happens and then it’s there. Sometimes it’s a stolen glance across the room or a game of spin the bottle gone wrong.

When there are situations involving a forcing of romantic interaction, the characters involved are absolutely correct to be made uncomfortable by this situation. I’ve seen too many stories where characters don’t act like themselves in these moments for purely the purpose of bringing in this romance… don’t do that.

What I tend to lean to are weird thoughts about the possibility of a romantic future and those thoughts that hit you unexpectedly. “Woah, I bet A would love this.” Things like that are what I usually do, just because that’s how I’ve always experienced things. If you want to go beyond your own perspective, ask your friends. It could definitely be a weird question, so if you’re not comfortable with that then Google will be your friend.

Everything else in a slow-burn is so character-oriented that there’s not really any more general advice I could give. Thanks again so much for asking, I hope this helps!

MASTERLISTS BY RAI — CHARACTER CONNECTIONS

Below the cut, you’ll find #170 different character connections you could use when plotting between characters. They’re separated into four categories: familial, platonic, adversarial, & romantic. Some roles are similar in nature but with different titles. Enjoy!

Keep reading

write up on polyamory & writing characters in polyamorous relationships in RP

so what is polyamory?

polyamory is the state of being in a romantic or sexual relationship with more than one person at the same time with all partners involved consenting and aware of the parameters of the polyamorous relationship

isn’t that just the same thing as a threesome / love triangle?

nope! polyamory differs because it’s a relationship. a threesome is purely sexual and often only happens once between those involved and love triangles don’t involve consent or sometimes even the knowledge of all parties involved and are largely considered unhealthy with how it can impact the parties involved.

polyamory thrives on two things: consent & awareness.

whereas a threesome is generally a one time thing, polyamory is a relationship involving consistency and commitment between more than one person.

polyamory isn’t just about sex. it’s about love and commitment as well for some if not all of those involved but there are many types of polyamory.

well then isn’t it basically polygamy?

polygamy is the marriage between one person and multiple partners. it’s a type of polyamory but does not always involve love between all parties involved and is usually politically related more than it is love and consent related. which is not to say polygamy can’t be consensual and loving the way polyamory in general is, it’s just to say the modern notion of polygamy is largely political.

TYPES OF POLYAMORY:

open relationships: in which two parties are in a relationship but it is open to the parties involved having other romantic relationships on the side / in addition to the one they are currently in

polygamy: closed relationship in which the parties involved are all married usually to one person

polycule: a complex inter-connected polyamory relationship

polyfidelity: all partners are primary to other partners within the group and sex is shared only among the group

eclectic relationship:  relationship in which members are of varying sexualities with diverse elements as to how they function in the group

group relationship: a committed, loving relationship involving multiple partners

inclusive relationship: a relationship in which all partners agree to include more lovers into their relationship

multipartner relationship: any relationship that is nonmonogomous

WRITING POLYAMOROUS CHARACTERS:

this is a tough one because a lot of roleplay settings involve only one on one interactions. a good way to roleplay polyamory is to have multiple verses set up in which certain character involved with relationships with your own take place in the same verse. it’s important that all characters involved are consenting to this relationship, understand it is not monogomous, and are okay with being in the relationship. this can involve as many people in a ship as you want. it can be as diverse as your character only loving one person but having multiple consenting sexual partners or as complex as loving multiple characters who also love your character / love certain characters in addition to. it’s up to you and what feels right for your character! 

polyamory is just as complex and diverse as your character(s) is / are, it’s okay to play around with group dynamics to see what is right with your character and polyamory.

just as much as it is important that the characters involved are consenting, the muns involved should be aware and consenting too. make sure you discuss it with your writing partners out of character as well to make sure they understand how it works and how it will play out in threads / writing.

ALWAYS REMEMBER:     CONSENT IS MANDATORY. CONSENT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF EVERY POLYAMOROUS RELATIONSHIP.

Writing Relationships: Hate to Love.

These types of relationships can be some of the most interesting and enjoyable, both to read and write, because they show us many sides of the same characters and the growth from a hatred to mixed feelings and finally to genuine love and acceptance is often heartwarming to experience. But relationships like also require finesse to portray in a believable, healthy manner.

Before we begin, some ground rules: 

1. Stay away from abuse.

A hate to love relationship is not an “abuse to love” relationship, and none of these tips are aimed toward writing such a thing. Check this list for things to keep out of your healthy end-game relationships.

2. These characters need to be ‘ship-able’ already!

If your character would not naturally end up in the end-game relationship, you’ve got a problem. The character’s ability to be friends – shared interests, enjoyment of each other’s company, comparability in communication – is crucial for the transition from hate to love.

Now then, how do we set up this hate to love relationship? 

1. Examine why the characters hate each other.

There’s a slew of different reasons two characters might start out hating each other, including (but certainly not limited to):

They come from opposing sides of a war, feud, or have some other group-oriented dislike.

They have very bad first impressions of each other.

They already hold distasteful misconceptions about each other based on what trusted companions have told them.

One (or both) of them are acting or believing something the other has good reason to hate. 

In order to pull off the first part of the relationship – the hate – you have to both have a reason for the characters to hate each other and convince the reader that the reason is a good reason. 

Unless you’re writing in omnipresent, you’re telling the story through your character’s eyes. No matter how good their current ‘enemy’ may be on the inside, the pov character won’t be looking for that goodness. They’ll see all the flaws and turn offs they anticipate the character to have, and this will likely (hopefully) effect them on an emotional level the reader can connect with.

2. What needs to change for this hate to be repealed?

Keep reading

Hi! Your blog is amazing and really helpful! The Master List has helped me so much! Anyways, I was wondering if you had any tips on writing “the almost scene” (non-sexual). Like, ways to build up to it and such. Thanks!

Writing the “Almost Sex but Not Quite” Scene

First, I’m so glad you’re enjoying the blog and have found the master list to be helpful. I hope this post will be helpful, too, but I’m not 100% I’m interpreting your question correctly, so if I missed the mark, please feel free to re-submit a clarification. :)

Here goes!

1) The Long-Term Build Up

Building up to an “Almost Sex but Not Quite” scene is much the same as building up to a sex scene. You need to build up the sexual tension between the two characters ahead of the moment where they actually start making out. These posts will help with that:

The Subtle Signs of Romantic Interest and LoveGuide: Characters Falling in LoveTransitioning Through Levels of Affection

2) The Short-Term Build Up

When the moment arrives that they’re finally making out for the first time, you want to give the scene as much emotional, sensual impact as you can without them actually engaging in intercourse. To do that, try the following:

Build lots of sexual tension into whatever they’re doing prior to making out. Whether they’re having a suggestive/flirtatious conversation, laughing and romping through a flower-filled field, or on a tenderly romantic date, there are lots of opportunities to push some of that long-term build up from above to the brink.

Explore what both characters are thinking and feeling (emotionally) in the moments leading up to making out and during those first moments. Are they nervous? Excited? Embarrassed? Aching for more? Letting your reader know what’s going through the character’s minds can add a lot of impact to that moment.

Use the five senses to ramp up the description of what’s happening. What does your character hear? See? Smell? Taste? Touch? All of these things play a role in ramping up the anticipation of each subsequent touch, kiss, utterance of love and/or desire, etc.

Remember to touch on internal sensations being felt by the characters. 

3) The Cessation

If you don’t want your characters to go through with intercourse, you’ll need to figure out how to stop their make out session. There are lots of ways you can do this, so choose something that works best for the story. Some possibilities:

One or both characters puts on the brakes, saying they’re not ready to go any further at that moment.

The more fervent making out slows down and turns into a session of cuddling and conversation, maybe even blissful sleep.

The make out session is interrupted. This could be a family member or roommate arriving home unexpectedly, a text message/phone call, the doorbell ringing, a strange noise in the house, noticing the time and realizing they’re late for something.

One participant suddenly becomes angry about something, perhaps recalling an unresolved argument or the other person said something upsetting.

4) The Fade to Black

If you want your characters to go through with intercourse, but you just don’t want to show it happening, you can make use of something known as the “fade to black.” The name comes from TV shows and movies when two characters are about to have sex or starting to have sex, so the scene would literally fade to black and open on a new scene where something else was happening. The best way to write a “fade to black” is to leave off with something that implies what’s going to happen in a way that is interesting without being cheesy. Something along the lines of “we spent the rest of the night exploring our love for each other” but less cheesy and more poetic.

5) The Cut to After

Whether you cease the make out scene before it gets to sex, or let your characters have sex behind closed doors, you may want to consider how you’re going to handle the “after” scene. That may be immediately after they stop making out (or after they’re done in a “fade to black” scenario), or it could be hours later, the next day, days later… whatever. But making sure to explore what that moment meant to your character and their relationship is an important part of doing it well. Did it change anything? Did it make them closer? Did it make things awkward? Are they excited to go again? Do they feel ready for more? These are all issues worth exploring, unless, of course, it was a one night stand.

Best of luck writing your “almost” scene! :)

————————————————————————————————-Have a question? My inbox is always open, but please make sure to check my FAQ and post master lists first to make sure I haven’t already answered a similar question. :)

Re-connecting

I've been absent from Tumblr while I've been writing my workbook so apologies to the people who I've had brief but wonderful convos with, particularly @robertpallesen, @bohemiansthings, @claypigeonpottery, @kaisercaimo, @felicity-b, and @bluebelly-sun-serpentine

I'm looking forward to seeing and reading your posts again.

Through the Music

Something that's always been extremely prominent in my life is the way God's always found ways to speak through me even before I had a grasp of His internal audible voice during prayer. In what felt like my darkest moments in junior high school, when nothing about Him made sense anymore in the context of the disheartening experience of coming home to the chaos of what I wanted desperately to resemble a real family, He gave me the lyrics I needed to hear for my heart to stay hanging onto Him. 

I know there are some who would be inclined to say that all this should have been through Christian-labled music only, but in my experience, I've observed that He's used every which way to reach me. Even in the secular music, He's reminded me of what it is I desperately long for in the human relationship, what kind of love it is He seeks to to lavish on me and what kind of love I am expected to share with others, the sorrows I will feel in hardship, the triumphant feeling of enduring because of a hope that is worth it, the thirst of being away from Him, and the joy of knowing He is always there for me. In almost every uneasy moment of my life, I have found solace in the lyrics of the music I am constantly exposed to and have discovered. 

I guess like everything else in life which I enjoy, there is always the struggle to keep all of this in check. To worship the creator and not the creation, to seek to know Him better rather than revel in the beauty of lyrics I feel I can relate to. To communicate with Him and continue to engage rather than remain in what feels like the holy place, sufficient enough to fill my need to feel something good like being addicted to an emotional drug. 

Some striking songs to me in the past year... There are many, but for a bit of personal record-keeping and sharing, I'll list out some. I'm sure I've cried for most of these at least once when listening to them, for one reason or another, and I consider that in my sentimentalism pretty freaking awesome.

Cambridge by Kina Grannis (especially striking after re-watching the WongFuProductions video "Strangers, Again" and hearing it used at the end) and Gonna Get Over You by Sara Bareilles: The way the word "maybe" hurt and stung when manifested in a relationship I took for granted, and the importance of moving on for truly understanding who I am. 

Some Boys as covered by Katherine McPhee in the series Smash: When I sang this to myself after hearing it for the first time through the series, I didn't just sing "some boys", but "some girls" as well. It was a reminder of the way broken people love and communicate in broken ways, and how it is both common and tragic.

Heart-Shaped Wreckage and Caught in the Storm from Smash, Clarity as covered by Jessica Sanchez on Glee: Describe well, the feeling of being submerged in the internal and external conflicts of a relationship with strong feelings and lots of baggage, and not wanting to hit the escape button even when it starts to feel like it makes sense. 

The Only Exception by Paramore and Mine as covered by Naya Rivera on Glee: The redemption of the hurts and wounds of growing up in a broken family by experiencing a love that proves to last. I heard both of these songs through Glee first, and Mine especially struck hard.

How He Loves by John Mark McMillan, A Thousand Years by Christina Perri, Let Me Love You (Until You Learn To Love Yourself) by Neyo: The deep and striking way in which God loves us, and how His pursuit of us is something I consider to be one of the most romantic love stories of all time. I got the privilege of watching John Mark McMillan live at an intimate bar performance with an old friend and her fellowship back in Baltimore and it was really something to remember. 

Louder by Charice, Shake it Out by Florence and the Machine: The triumph of moving forward with awesome joy despite pain. While both of these are secular songs, I've recognized that this kind of triumph and moving forward for myself personally has only been successful and joyful when moving in step with where God asks me to go.

Big Machine as covered by Mark Duplass in the movie Safety Not Guaranteed: The scene for when this song was chosen for use in this film gave my heart goosebumps (I consider it reason enough to rewatch the entire movie), and this song voiced so eloquently but humbly the frustration for how the world tries to box people in to make them fit and function in society. If I had to be honest, the handsome Mark Duplass singing while simultaneously playing the zither with a deep dark mysterious yet child-like puppy-faced expression was also pretty easy on the eyes and ears. Also strongly resonates with Mad World by Gary Jules and Little Boxes as covered by Walk Off the Earth.

The Scientist covered by the main Glee Cast: The pains and crazies of love and life, expressed in the awesomeness that is called music. Coupled with Mine, the ultimate tear-jerkers of the Glee episode that featured these songs.

Bright Lights and Cityscapes by Sara Bareilles: A gorgeous and incredibly sad expression of wanting to be the one to make things better for someone. Also echoes a bit in my mind of Cameo Lover by Kimbra, wanting the other to respond in the depth one's perceived they've already invested. 

Brave by Sarah Bareilles: An upbeat affirmation of being oneself to others, despite the past hurts and perceived social backlash. This one was too happy to cry to but my heart cried fat tears of joy when I first heard it because its level of awesome blew my mind.

Alright. I think this is more than a crazy exhaustive list (and a somewhat self-indulgent post...) and is probably going to be unreadable to some, but Sharon, aren't you glad you wrote this so that when you're old and senile you can read it again and revel in the awesome music you loved when you were younger? Yes yes, I am glad. Thanks, Sharon.