Blitzstrike - Tumblr Posts

Hi! Here’s what your favorite Helluva Boss ship says about you:

Moxillie: The only thing you want in life is a happy and loving marriage, and honestly, good for you. None of your relationships have worked out yet, but you're certain that one will someday

Stolitz: You watched The Hunchback Of Notre Dame and you thought that Claude Frollo was the good guy

Stolas/Stella: You are a bottom to end all bottoms. You don't want a powerful woman to step on you, no, you wouldn't be satisfied unless she pressed you flat with a steamroller

Blitzika: You say that you hate your ex, but you're constantly beating yourself up over ruining your relationship with them, and if they wanted you back, you'd say yes in a heartbeat. You never moved on, and secretly you hope that they haven't moved on either

Blitzstrike: Your favorite Disney movie is The Hunchback of Notre Dame. How did I know, you might ask? Because why else would your favorite ship be Spunky, sharp-tongued person down on their luck X The only person who could potentially save them from the asshole threatening their life and their livelihood? In your mind, Blitz is Esmeralda, Striker is Phoebus, and Stolas is Claude Frollo

Blitzø/Loona: You are single-handedly keeping the stepdad category alive on a certain internet corn website, and I don't mean that in a good way. You need to touch some grass

Fizzmodeus: You say that you want what they have, but really you're looking for a rich and powerful sugar daddy to take care of you so that you'll never have to work again. Your ultimate goal is to be a trophy spouse, and you make no apologies for it

Beelzebub/Tex: You're a himbo with a thing for party girls capable of handling enough alcohol to pickle a blue whale's liver. If you drank half as much as your current girlfriend does, you'd need to have your stomach pumped, but somehow she can handle it just fine

Loona/Tex: Pick-me with a capital P. You're exclusively attracted to men who are already in relationships, and your favorite songs are You Belong With Me and Girlfriend because you fantasise about your crush dumping his current partner for you. You need to stop what you're doing and chase after someone who's 1.) Single and 2.) Interested in you

Andrealphus/Vassago: You're the same brand of aesthetic girly who's into Charlastor. You don't care if the characters you ship have any actual chemistry as long as they look good together

do you ship charlie and alastor? :)

No, but I respect people who do. Anyone can ship anything. The only time I think shipping is unacceptable is when it’s inc*st or p*dophilia. If you want to ship a slightly younger character to a more older character, just age the younger one up, or age the older one down. If the characters are canonically ab*sive/toxic towards each other, you gotta make headcanons and stories, making these characters go through a lot of difficult obstacles that make them better people over time. It can’t just be, “I know what I did was wrong but I’m good now”. No. You gotta put them through different situations that build up to them slowly getting better and making them actually change. That, or you can just make an AU where they aren’t ab*sive/toxic. And with shipping inc*st. No, just eliminate that entirely. No headcanons, stories, or AU’s are okay for that. At least in my opinion.

I’ve been typing too long I gotta stop-

EDIT: You literally asked me 1 simple question, and I had to make it look like 100. Sorry. 😶