Artemis Fowl Movie - Tumblr Posts
Guess who just saw the Artemis Fowl movie trailer!
It’s me.
They can keep it.
Please.
I’m begging them to.
I am only two minutes into the Artemis Fowl movie and I am officially deciding that this is nothing more than Mulch making up bs to mess with people.
Alright, I guess I’ve changed my mind about the Artemis Fowl movie
This whole movie is just an au that I shall dub “Orion Fowl”
I refuse to believe anything else
Alright, Disney, repeat after me!
Artemis Fowl II is not even remotely athletic.
Artemis Fowl II couldn’t shoot the broad side of a barn if he tried.
Artemis Fowl II doesn’t wear anything other than a suit unless he’s robbing a Swiss vault, going through a crisis, or has no other option.
Artemis Fowl II had a very formal relationship with his father before he went to Russia.
Artemis Fowl II would never throw himself into the midst of a battle, he would let Butler handle it.
Artemis Fowl II grew up sneaking around his house frequently enough that he knew exactly what each security camera could see. He definitely would have noticed a conveniently placed hole in the floor.
Artemis Fowl II had very little remorse for any of his actions for a long time.
The real Artemis Fowl II would never.
ARTEMIS FOUL (Dir: Kenneth Branagh, 2020).
Sci-fi actioner based upon the best selling series of YA books by Eoin Colfer.
When his criminal mastermind father is kidnapped, 12 year old Artemis Foul (Ferdia Shaw) must secure the Aculos, a magical fairy device of immense power, in order to buy his father's freedom. Along for the ride are butler Dom (Nonso Anozie), fairy cop (Lara McDonnell) and giant dwarf Mulch Diggums (Josh Gad) who has the downright freaky ability of unhinging his jaw, digging with his mouth and shooting the dirt from his backside. Big names in small roles include Colin Farrell as Fowl Sr and Judi Dench as some kind of ancient elf commander in chief.
Visit my blog JINGLE BONES MOVIE TIME to read the full review! Link below.
