Analyse - Tumblr Posts

Sooo, are so gonna talk how 0% was affected by Tom's words and 100% believed the Twins' testimony? I was in that 0% and like, huh? Sure, Tom is an asshole and a coward, but:

The room above, meant for the kids to eventually find it and learn her secret.

The devs' message at the end of the game that if you or any of your loved once suffer from suicides thoughts, reach out for help which basically says that Mary-Ann was going to kill herself.

Sure, she was unstable, but she had the book on how to raise a transgender kid. She named Tyler Ollie, his first name and not dead name, because she cared. Even Tessa said that Mary-Ann believed in her kids being perfect and deserving the entire world. Plus, after Mary-Ann lost her firstborn, I doubt she'd go with a gun at one of her children.

I'm still a bit confused on what actually happened, but the game made a point of "believe of what you want to believe" so I guess there is not much to do about it. It's sad that Mary-Anne drowned and that Alyson stabbed her because of how scared she was for Tyler and after she heard how her mom threatened to shoot Tom. There were definitely issues there, her mood swings, maybe some visions even maybe (bipolar? schizophrenia? just long term depression and anxiety that got triggered after everything that happened to her?). But still. It seemed like she loved her kids more than anything and was just seriously struggling mentally. Unless she was violent (or her mental illness was), I really don't think she pointed a gun at Tyler bc she got so mad at him for cutting his hair.

was talking with my mom about how i thought Rachel had powers in Before the Storm too and i was like “lol imagine being Chloe and every girl you’re with has powers” and she casually said “actually what if it was Chloe who had awakened them and that’s why Max and Rachel both had them” and now i’m thinking about how Max discovered her powers right after Chloe got shot and how Rachel started the forest fire right after she was hanging out with Chloe in the junkyard and now i have thoughts.

Thinking about Tyler Ronan begging and begging to join the hockey team as a kid before Mary-Ann’s death and one of the first things we learn about Alyson is that she was on the varsity hockey team in high school (which implies she’d probably played throughout middle school as well imo) while Tyler was at Fireweed despite never really seeming to have an interest in sports herself

And I’m just….she had to have joined originally because of Tyler, he wanted to join so bad and never got the chance after that night but she had the option and she did because he couldn’t and it probably made her feel connected with her brother during those years when they never saw each other and didn’t use their voice and it just kills me

i feel low-key poetic how lilly, besides how evil she is, couldn't kill clem because she protected her and were there for her when she was little. the line "this supposed to be easy" really touched me, and next, if you decide to tell lilly, "you won't kill me, because we were family once" ouch, i think it's so so good how they managed the relationship between them, cause even if lilly its the worse person in the world, she deep down still cares and see that little girl she cared about.

as i’m rewatching the first season, why was lily so against leaving? like did she not know about the raiders? did she not care? also why did lee not show the group that recording of jolene?? i feel like that would’ve been good enough to have the group finally leave the motel. but yk, plot purposes.

Der Tatort Münster will vergessen (aber ich lasse ihn nicht)

Vor ein paar Tagen hat @iiiflow diesen wunderbaren Post zum Tatort Münster veröffentlicht, in dem sie ihren Frust über die mangelnde Thematisierung von Nadeshdas Tod im Canon ausdrückt. Tja, und was soll ich sagen?

Abgesehen davon, dass ich ihre Worte sehr gut nachempfinden kann, hat der Post (und die Reaktionen darauf) in mir das Bedürfnis ausgelöst, ein paar Gedanken zu diesem Thema aufzuschreiben, die schon länger in meinem Kopf herumgeistern.

Vor einiger Zeit habe ich nämlich einen Text des deutschen Medienwissenschaftlers Lorenz Engell gelesen, der sich mit Serien und deren Aufbau, ihrer Zeitlichkeit und (Dis-)Kontinuität beschäftigt. Ausgehend von seinen Überlegungen habe ich viel über den Tatort Münster und seine permanente Gegenwart nachgedacht und darüber, warum sie mich eigentlich so stört.

Dieser Post ist nun also eine pseudo-wissenschaftliche Auseinandersetzung mit dem Prinzip der permanenten Gegenwart und seinen Auswirkungen auf die Figuren, Handlungen und Zuschauer*innen der Serie. Er ist ziemlich lang geworden, aber am Ende gibt es eine knappe Zusammenfassung.

Wenn ihr euch dafür interessiert, könnt ihr gerne weiterlesen. Ansonsten – don't mind me. <3

Bevor ich loslege, möchte ich kurz anmerken, dass alle Zitate – sofern nicht anders angegeben – von Lorenz Engell stammen. Die kompletten Literaturangaben findet ihr unten. :)

Fangen wir erst eimal von vorne an. Das, was ich gerade als permanente Gegenwart bezeichnet habe, ist das Grundprinzip von Episodenserien. Als solche behandelt der Tatort Münster in jeder Episode eine abgeschlossene Handlung, die nicht an vorangegangene oder nachfolgende Episoden anknüpft und auch keine Voraussetzung dafür schafft. Die permanente Gegenwart bedeutet also nicht zwangsläufig, dass sich nichts verändert, sondern:

Frühere Episoden legen [...] nicht den Grund für spätere und bleiben im Hinblick auf sie völlig konsequenzenlos (S. 77).

So wird es zum Beispiel möglich, dass Thiel und Boerne in den ersten Jahren der Serie regelmäßig ihr Wohnhaus wechseln, ohne dass es in irgendeiner Art und Weise als Teil der Geschichte verhandelt werden würde.

Das ist eigentlich kein ungewöhnliches Prinzip. Je länger ich darüber nachgedacht habe, desto mehr Serien dieser Art sind mir eingefallen, insbesondere im Bereich der Krimi-Serien – man denke nur an Mord ist ihr Hobby, Monk oder zu großen Teilen auch Wilsberg.

Das Genre bietet sich ja auch an: Es gibt einen Kriminalfall und dazu eine Gruppe von Menschen, die ihn lösen muss. Und wenn es schließlich um den Kriminalfall gehen soll, warum dann die Handlung mit zwischenmenschlichen Beziehungen und aufwändigen Charakterstudien unnötig verkomplizieren?

Nicht nur ist es einfacher, die Episoden über einen Kriminalfall voneinander abzugrenzen, es ist mit Sicherheit auch günstiger. Da man nicht auf folgenübergreifende Geschichten angewiesen ist, gestaltet sich zum Beispiel die Suche nach Drehbuchautor*innen deutlich flexibler. Und es hat noch andere Vorzüge: Die Episoden können in beliebiger Reihenfolge und vollkommen unabhängig voneinander geschaut und trotzdem verstanden und genossen werden. Eine willkürliche Folge vom Tatort Münster reicht, um alle anderen zu verstehen. Für das Format "Tatort" ist das eigentlich perfekt: Du kannst problemlos nur zwei Folgen im Jahr drehen, ohne dir Sorgen darum machen zu müssen, dass die Zuschauenden womöglich schon wieder vergessen haben, was in der letzten Episode vor einem halben Jahr passiert ist.

Und jetzt mal kurz allen Wehmut um versäumte Entwicklungen beiseite, so nachvollziehbar sie auch sind – irgendwie ist es doch ein kleines bisschen cool, oder nicht? Vielleicht geht es nur mir so, aber in Zeiten von Serien, die teilweise mehr als 15 Staffeln (!) haben, genieße ich es manchmal auch, eine Serie kreuz und quer schauen zu können. Bei Fortsetzungsserien – also Serien, deren Episodenhandlungen aufeinander aufbauen – müssen alle Folgen in vorbestimmter Reihenfolge durchgestanden werden. Man kann nichts skippen, zumindest nicht, ohne etwas vom Verständnis einzubüßen. Und vor allem kann man nicht genauso einfach mittendrin einsteigen, nur weil es da gerade eine besonders gelungene Folge gibt. Beim Tatort Münster ist das anders, da geht das. Und Halleluja, war ich dankbar dafür, als ich damals das erste Mal versucht habe, nach und nach alle Folgen anzuschauen. Zu dieser Zeit war ich froh, wenn ich die Filme in 480p auf YouTube gefunden habe. Wenn ich dann auch noch auf eine Reihenfolge angewiesen gewesen wäre? Na, Prost Mahlzeit. Dass es keinen übergeordneten Handlungsstrang gab, kam mir nur gelegen. Und wenn ich jetzt auf Folgen zurückblicke, die aus den Jahren vor "meiner" Zeit im Fandom stammen, ist das ehrlich gesagt noch immer so.

Anders ist das irgendwie bei den Folgen, die danach kamen. Da kann ich weniger leicht darüber hinwegsehen, dass es zwischen den Folgen kaum Verbindung gibt. Aber warum stört mich das Episodenprinzip bzw. das Prinzip der permanenten Gegenwart bei den Folgen, deren Ausstrahlung ich aktiv miterlebt habe, mehr?

Die Antwort ist, ganz simpel ausgedrückt: Weil ich mich erinnere. Oder konkreter: Weil ich mich dazu entscheide, mich zu erinnern.

Das mag sich im ersten Moment sehr offensichtlich anhören, aber es ist eine wichtige Erkenntnis, wenn es um das Schauen von Serien geht. Engell formuliert in diesem Zusammenhang:

Keineswegs ist die Serie einfach die Summe oder Abfolge der Episoden, sie ist ein eigenes Gebilde mit eigenem Gedächtnis (S. 82).

Denn nur, weil die Folgen einer Episodenserie mit ihrer abgeschlossenen Handlung keine direkte Voraussetzung füreinander schaffen, bedeutet das nicht, dass alles aus ihnen vergessen wird. Im Gegenteil:

Innerhalb der Episoden [...] gibt es ein klares Privileg des Erinnerns. Die Hauptfiguren kennen einander bereits, sie werden weder uns noch einander vorgestellt. Sie sind mit dem Ort der Handlung und wenigstens einigen Nebenfiguren vertraut. Sie wissen, was sie zu tun haben, sie bilden feste, sicher sitzende Handlungsmuster aus (S. 81).

Man stelle sich nur vor, was es für ein Chaos wäre, wenn Thiel und Boerne sich in jeder Folge neu kennenlernen würden (obwohl diese Variante, wenn ich so drüber nachdenke, natürlich auch ihre Vorzüge hätte ...). Klar sind die Hauptfiguren einander ab der zweiten Folge bereits vertraut, kennen ihre Marotten, ihre Stärken und Schwächen. Aber dieses "Privileg des Erinnerns", wie Engell es genannt hat, beschränkt sich auf einen festgelegten Rahmen:

Die Figuren der Episodenserie [...] akkumulieren von einer Episode auf die andere keinerlei Erfahrung. [...] Sie erleben [...] (zumindest strukturell) dasselbe Abenteuer, aber sie begegnen ihm völlig ohne jede Referenz auf frühere Abenteuer. Sie lernen auch nichts hinzu. Ob ihnen etwas bekannt vorkommt oder nicht, das müssen sie bei jedem Vorkommnis neu entscheiden, und wir können nur an ihrem Verhalten ablesen, wie sie sich jeweils entschieden haben. [...] Sie vergessen (S. 81).

Und so ist es auch kein Wunder, dass sich niemand mehr an Nadeshda zu erinnern scheint, nicht einmal Thiel. Dass es nichts gibt, das auf ihre ehemalige Existenz hindeutet, geschweige denn auf Trauer seitens der Charaktere. Engell schreibt in seinem Text sogar wortwörtlich:

Selbst das Ausscheiden einer Schauspielerin [...] und damit mitunter sogar einer Figur [...] bleibt innerhalb des diegetischen Universums der Einzelepisode völlig unbemerkt und für die übrigen Figuren folgenlos (S. 81).

Die Frage, was in der Serie möglich und was nicht möglich ist, was erklärt und was nicht erklärt wird, hängt also grundlegend damit zusammen, was erinnert und was vergessen wird. Für die Handlung einer Serie ist es essentiell, fortlaufend zwischen diesen Operationen – Erinnern und Vergessen – hin und her zu schalten. Und das gilt nicht nur für die Figuren innerhalb der Serie, sondern auch für das Publikum.

Denn die Sache ist die: Damit das Prinzip der Episodenserie funktioniert, müssen nicht nur die Charaktere der Serie zwischen Erinnern und Vergessen umschalten – auch die Zuschauer*innen

müssen vergessen, dass sie jedes Mal in der Woche zuvor bereits ein zum Verwechseln ähnliches Vorkommnis, eine nahezu identische Episode, ein struktur- und verlaufsgleiches Abenteuer angesehen haben (S. 82).

In der Regel tun die Zuschauer*innen das ganz automatisch. Die operativen Vorgänge des Erinnerns und Vergessens gliedern sich ein in eine Reihe von Vorgaben, die ihnen der Film (bzw. das filmische Universum) macht. Wie bereits der französische Philiosoph Étienne Souriau festgehalten hat:

Genau genommen setzt jeder Film sein Universum (mit den Figuren, den Wesen und Dingen, seinen allgemeinen Gesetzen sowie dem Raum und der Zeit, welche ihm eigen sind) (Souriau, S. 142).

Von den Zuschauer*innen werde in diesem Zusammenhang verlangt, sich wohlwollend auf dieses Universum einzulassen. Das passiert, wie bereits gesagt, meistens automatisch und dient laut Engell dem Genuss der Serie.

Aber was, wenn ich als Zuschauerin nicht mehr vergesse? Was, wenn ich nicht mehr bereit dazu bin, zu vergessen?

Bei den älteren Folgen vom Tatort Münster fiel mir das Erinnern und Vergessen im Sinne der Serie leichter. Kein Wunder, habe ich sie schließlich wild durcheinander und in sehr kurzer Zeit gesehen. Bei den neueren Folgen ist das anders.

Beim Schauen wird jetzt eine bestimmte Reihenfolge in meinem Kopf abspeichert. Ich weiß genau, welche Episode mit welchem Inhalt auf welche Episode mit anderem Inhalt folgt. Es wird zu einer klaren Abfolge von Geschichten. Wenn eine vorausgegangene Folge zum Beispiel besondere Erwartungen in mir geweckt hat, dann fällt mir eher auf, wenn in der nächsten Folge jegliche Bezüge dazu fehlen.

Natürlich könnte ich mich trotzdem dafür entscheiden, diese fehlenden Bezüge zu übersehen, die Handlung der vorherigen Folgen zu vergessen. Aber nicht nur, dass es mir deutlich schwerer als bei früheren Folgen fällt – ich will es auch nicht mehr.

Seit fast zehn Jahren bin ich jetzt schon Teil des Fandoms. Zehn Jahre, in denen ich so unendlich viel zum Tatort Münster gesehen, gelesen, geschrieben, geschnitten, gepostet habe. Unzählige Gedanken und Gespräche. In meinem Kopf ist so absurd viel zum Tatort abgespeichert, dass es sich manchmal so anfühlt, als würde die Hälfte meiner Gehirnkapazität nur dafür draufgehen. Du könntest mich nachts um drei Uhr wecken und ich könnte dir genau sagen, in welchen Szenen in welchen Folgen sich Thiel und Boerne länger als drei Sekunden anschauen. Und wahrscheinlich noch den passenden Timestamp dazu. And I'm not even joking.

Ich würde behaupten, dass mir die Figuren im Tatort vertrauter sind als ein paar der Menschen, die ich jeden Tag sehe. Natürlich will ich mich erinnern.

Natürlich will ich mich erinnern, wenn Thiel und Boerne einander das Du anbieten. Und dann noch einmal. Und noch einmal. Natürlich will ich mich erinnern, wenn Thiel nach etlichen von Jahren mal wieder von seinem Sohn in Neuseeland erzählt. Natürlich will ich mich erinnern, wenn Alberich an Boernes Krankenhausbett steht, wenn Frau Klemm von ihrem Mann beim BKA erzählt, wenn Herbert wegen Spargeldiebstahls in Polizeigewahrsam genommen wird. Und natürlich will ich mich erinnern, wenn Nadeshda plötzlich tot ist. Nicht mehr da ist. Wie könnte ich sie vergessen? Ich kann es nicht. Ich will es nicht.

Der Tatort Münster dreht seine Episoden, als wären sie ein alleinstehender Film, der ohne Kontext durch die unendlichen Fernsehweiten schwebt und sich nur zufällig an den Figuren eines anderen Filmes bedient. Vorher, hinterher, gestern, morgen, heute – das alles gibt es im Tatort Münster gar nicht.

[Die Episoden] sind in ihrem zeitlichen Verhältnis zueinander überhaupt nicht definiert. […] Die eigene Serialität wird von den Primetime-Episodenserien nicht nur nicht verhandelt, sondern geradezu geleugnet (S. 78.).

Und da kommen wir eben nicht mehr so gut zusammen, der Tatort und ich. Denn der Tatort vergisst. Muss vergessen. Und ich erinnere mich. An jedes Detail.

Und dass die Autor*innen vom Tatort Münster nicht einmal beim Vergessen konsequent sind, macht die Sache wirklich nicht einfacher. Du willst mir erklären, dass sie ein Jahrzehnt später noch mal mit dem selben Täter zu tun haben, aber das Duzen selbst nach 25 Jahren keine Option ist? Dass sie es schaffen, Nadeshda in Boernes Vorhölle einzubauen, aber ein trauernder Gedanke an sie in einer späteren Folge zu viel verlangt ist? Klar.

Es mag vielleicht ein alberner Gedanke sein, aber irgendwie tut es mir auch für die Figuren leid. Sie dürfen nicht lernen, sich nicht weiterentwickeln, haben weder Vergangenheit noch Zukunft.

Jede Hochzeit ist die erste, jeder Todesfall ebenso. Alle Krisen lösen immer dieselben starken Emotionen aus, jeder Rückfall ist der erste Fall (S. 84).

Und ich? Ich sitze da und versuche mich auch beim vierten Mal noch zu freuen, wenn Thiel und Boerne sich das Du anbieten.

TL;DR: Der Tatort Münster ist eine Episodenserie, deren einzelne Folgen und Handlungen in keinem zeitlichen Verhältnis zueinander stehen. Wenngleich grundlegende Elemente erinnert werden (Hauptfiguren, Schauplätze ...), werden Inhalte wie der Kriminalfall oder Entwicklungen in zwischenmenschlichen Beziehungen vergessen. Damit dieses Episodenprinzip funktioniert, müssen nicht nur die Figuren, sondern auch die Zuschauer*innen vergessen. Weil ich in einer Art und Weise in die Serie investiert bin, dass ich weder vergessen kann noch will, bleibt mir am Ende nichts anderes übrig, als mich über die Folgen zu ärgern und tief im Inneren zu hoffen, dass irgendwann doch noch alles anders wird.

Anyways, wer schreibt die Meta-Fanfiction, in der Thiel und Boerne merken, dass sie einem Universum gefangen sind, das sie immer wieder zum Vergessen zwingt?

Und hier noch die versprochenen Literaturangaben:

Engell, Lorenz: Das Schaltbild: Philosophie des Fernsehens, Wallstein Verlag 2021, https://www.nomos-elibrary.de/index.php?doi=10.5771/9783835397392 (zugegriffen am 26.04.2023).

Souriau, Étienne (1997) Die Struktur des filmischen Universums und das Vokabular der Filmologie[1951]. In: Montage AV 6/2, S. 140-157.

Für das German Crime Zine durfte ich einen Text schreiben, der mir schon lange am Herzen liegt: Eine Analyse der Beziehung zwischen Thiel und Nadeshda. Es ist meine kleine Hommage an ihre Freundschaft und an Nadeshda selbst, die für mich immer noch fest zum Tatort Münster gehört.

Vielen Dank auch an @cricrithings für die Beta. <3

📝 writing preview: @cornchrunchie - Tatort Münster

🔎 Vorbestellungen hier!

Relation in Vampire Knight : Main Trio. Zeki part.

Soooooo, This post took me forever, but you probably know that. Anyway, I’m going to explain how the development of Zero and Yuuki’s relationship took place in the manga.  Conclusion of my Yume Part: Kaname and Yuuki shared a tragic love. That means, 1) Yes, they did love each other. At some point, at least. 2) Due to circumstances ( aka Kaname’s goal and sick possesiveness, Yuuki’s blood thirst which can be only quenched by Zero) they were destined to fall apart. 3) thus, Yume was not the endgame of Vampire Knight. 

Hino chose to make Yuuki and Zero live together for a few centuries at least, before Yuuki sacrificied herself to allow Kaname to taste the human life. For the entire Zeki fandom, that’s the very accomplishment of their ship, which endured a lot of difficulties, misunderstandments and obstacles (That’s you, Kaname)

Let’s go back to the very beginning and see how Zeki did, piece by piece, win over the trio’s battle. Warning, spoilers ahead

Arc 1 Pre-Cross Academy Time -------> Zero and Yuuki met in very infortunate circumstances. Yuuki was getting through her accident’s traumatism, and one fateful night, Kaien Cross brought back at home a teenage boy, covered in blood. With her big heart, she can’t help but try to help him. However, he doesn’t let her approach him, the only exception is the first night, when he lets her clean him up of all this blood. He put his trust onto her, because he could feel she didn’t have any ill-intentions towards him. However, this complete trust he has for her will not last long. Why ?  Zero is, unsurprisingly, coping with a traumatism : the murder of his parents and the “kidnapping with consent” of Ichiru, by a Pureblood. All of this happened because his Hunter parents were unfortunate enough to be the ones who killed Shizuka’s lover, his name put into their list by a cruel trick of Rido, the Senate and the Association. Zero was coming from a Hunter family, and while their guild only hunted the Level’s E, fallen into madness, we could easily predict that they weren’t very fond of the vampires, overall. Add this horrific murder, and you create a child traumatized and who will turn into some vampire-hating person.  Getting back to Zeki : Kaien was put in charge of Zero, and he can try to cope with the accident peacefully. Enter Kaname, a Pureblood. No wonder Zero was immediately on his guard and ready to hurt Kaname. And Yuuki ended up in the middle of this.  As she introduced Kaname to Zero, as her saviour and a kind, protective and pacifist vampire, Zero feels digusted towards the Pureblood, as he now sees them as pure evil. And he absolutely can’t stand that Yuuki, who he thought was a sort of ally, thinks of Kaname in such a good way. He can’t completely trust her now, as she is defending his “enemy”.  Thus, the young boy rejects her rather roughly, telling her “ to not touch him with the hand you touched this man”. Exact words, more or less. (where are my mangas when I need them ? )

--------> However, with time passing by, he realized Yuuki can’t be blamed for her feelings towards the “monster” he encountered. Even he can’t exactly reject the small girl who tries to help him and to understand him. That’s why he took her “under his wings“. In one of the Arc-1 chapters, we see Yuuki trying to see Kaname, but she ended up sleeping in the stairs. When she wakes up, She is confronted to a Kaname who is drinking Ruka’s blood. Talk about a heartbreak. And who exactly is the one who catches a distressed Yuuki when she runs out the Night Dorms ? Zero, exactly.  The same pattern occured more or less in one of the first chapters of VKM : Sayori meets Kaname, Yuuki is very pleased to see the vampire, and Zero is watching with wary eyes the scene. As he cannot force Yuuki to get away from the “threat”, he doesn’t want to make her sad, he watches over her. That’s the beginning of the Knight-Queen-King masquerade.  In this part, Yuuki and Zero had both harsh events which will torment them in their own way, and while Yuuki si compelled to Kaname, and thus to the vampires, Zero is digusted, untrustful towards them. However, as they lived together, they developped a want or a need to protect and help each-other. Yuuki does it by trying to understand Zero and help him to start considering that not all vampires are evil, and Zero does it by watching over her, because in his opinions, she will end up hurt by this Pureblood she loved this dearly.  And he wasn’t exactly wrong on that point.  But we will speed until the Cross Academy Arc, which contains both Shizuka’s and Rido’s Event. 

ARC 2:

Yuuki and Zero’s relationship does have variations, if I may say. during those arcs, they seem to have a back-and-forth chemistry. One day, Zero would be Yuuki’s protector, the next day, he would be “protected” by Yuuki. They have their moments, let’s say. And during those events, they are very, very uncertain about what they want for themselves and for the other. This is the first point of this Arc, where will be explained why this couple had difficulties to go with each other, on Yuuki and Zero’s point of view, of course. Next, I will do what keeps them attracted to each other. But first, the complications. :

1) Zero’s uncertainity about letting Yuuki go. 

-------> On one hand, Zero is sure that Kaname Kuran is too close to Yuuki, and he doubts that he is only interested by Yuuki’s wellbeing. Why being interested in a fragile human being when you’re an immortal vampire ? Why protecting her at all costs, for that long, if you don’t have “plans” for her ?  He is still very untrustful towards the vampires, and he is considered as the “mean, strict prefect of the couple”. Keeping the humans from those “ monsters” is his duty, because he has not only been chosen for this by the headmaster, but he also comes from a Hunter family. He wouldn’t let any fragile humans getting close to a vampire. Certainly not close to a Pureblood. Especially not Yuuki, the only one person he allowed himself to get close to. Of course he wouldn’t let this precious girl go with the bloodsucker. 

On the other hand..... Well. He is a bloodsucker too. And a dangerous one for that matter. He managed to stay sane for 4 long years, but when Arc one begins, we see that he struggles to not become a Level E. The same way he wouldn’t  let Kaname or other vampires hurt Yuuki, he certainly couldn’t forgive himself if he was the one who takes her life away. He cannot be greedy with her, Yuuki has done many things  for him. 

------> And each time he drinks from Yuuki ,(and the girl almost forced him to take her blood several times, sweet reminder. This does need some check-ups, but I can’t right now think about one time Zero went totally savage to drink her blood. ), he does feel guilty. He can’t stand living dependent of someone, especially on his precious girl. We can assume that during those four years between his arrival and the first arc of VK, Zero’s feelings for Yuuki had grown, and he was “nearly in love” with her when the story is beginning. I’ll explain why I don’t think he was totally in love with her at that point later.  In love or not in love, he can’t be dependent of someone like Yuuki, and having to drink her blood. He feels unworthy of her. He even told her once to not worry about him and to not help him. Not drinking her blood would mean to become a Level E, the thing he loathes the most (aside of Kaname, of course) and to die in painful ways or by the hand of a Hunter. Pretty much selfless of him.  The poor boy was in complete denial. Was it better to get greedy so at least Yuuki wouldn’t be in the hands of the most evil creatures of the vampires, or was it better to let her go what she wanted, because he was unworthy of her ? At this point, Zero just wants Yuuki to be safe.  In the end, it was the revelation of Yuuki being a Kuran Pureblood who took the best of him : he let his anger towards the vampires, and especially towards Pureblood  took  the best of him. Discovering that Yuuki was the kind of vampires he despised the most was a shock. But I think what upset him the most was that Kaname knew all of this and played with them. That fitted perfectly with the manipulative, sick tendencies of Pureblood to play with life like the others didn’t matter. And touching Yuuki, was the one thing to not to do, as she was a pillar for his sanity. And Kaname just turned Yuuki back into a vampire.  (Seriously, I don’t think he would blame Yuuki for what she has become-, what she really is. She didn’t know. He isn’t stupid enough to put her guilty for something she couldn’t control).  He lets Yuuki leave with Kaname after two arcs of accepting and rejecting Yuuki’s help and affection, before finally let the one who obviously played her for 10 f*cking years and this, my dear friend, is a major error. 

2) Yuuki’s doubts and unawareness of her own feelings. Yuuki is a sweet girl, but she did some poor mistakes too. I think that in those two arcs, especially the first, she really focused on Kaname, being her saviour and all. And that, despite her doubts about him being truly honest:

--> The fact she seriously doubted he was the one who took her memories away. Multiples times in the storyline, she thought about him being the one who took her at the snowy place. Why else could he arrive on time to save her, when she was definitely lost and far from any places ? Why would he take so much interests on her, watching over Yuuki when she was little ( even when Kaien adopted her and he was no longer “needed” to protect her ? ). Yuuki was no fool, and on her quest to discover what happened on this fateful night, she will confront Kaname several times. The latter will redirect the discussion every single time. Of course, he was hiding something. Yuuki was fully aware of this. But the girl will always return to her precious savior. While she was aware of Kaname’s potential involvement in her lost past, she was completely unaware of her feelings for Zero. 

----> On several occasions, she declared that she wanted to be his ally, even if she is pretty much powerless ( the most evident example is when Zero decided to run away from his home and Yuuki, precious child that she is, successfully convince him to stay.) She wanted to be an ally, because she wanted to support him  through the pain of his “sickness”, she was willing to give him her own blood, so he could live and stay. That is devotion. That is her willing to stay. And maybe, just maybe, this is her confounding profond affection for family with love. 

Which is understandable. Zero and Yuuki were partly raised together, at Kaien’s home. And Kaname’s saviour appareance found itself a place long ago in Yuuki’s heart. Feelings of the same nature getting towards two different persons. Of course, someone can easily be confused.  I can’t deny that Yuuki was in love with Kaname, whether it was due to sincere feelings or her Pureblood nature attracted by an equal.  ----> However, I don’t think love is exclusive to one and only one person. You can be in love with two people. It’s rare. It’s confusing,  but it can happen. Yuuki Cross/Kuran was a subject to this mixed, tricky situation. She just doesn’t realize it, or rather deny it by forcing herself to think of Zero as a brother and a person who needs help.  You may or may not agree with this. But otherwise, why would she long for Zero’s blood, just after her awakening ? Why would she entrust Zero with her life when she was human and he needed her blood ? Why would she have a need for both Kaname and Zero’s blood, after a whole year away from the latter?  Yuuki wasn’t completely ignorant of her feelings. But she turned them off when she awakened from her human semi-slumber, and left Zero to join a world she didn’t know a single thing of, because she loved Kaname, and she wasn’t aware that she needed Zero that much.  Secund mistake.  3) Last but not least, their tendencie to not take the occasions to confront each others on their feelings. 

Seems rather familiar if you’re reading VK Memories. Well. Zero and Yuki’s tendencie to take things slow, like, really really slow, or to simply leave things unchanged isn’t new. This is the main, recurring problem I have with this ship.  I can rather understand that they have all eternity to develop their relationship in VKM, that the VK’s events weren’t exactly easy to overcome, and that Yuuki’s main concern was to take care of Ai. They have a load of excuses, and that’s why I’m willing to take my patience and follow VKM.  But in the first two arcs ? No excuses. Zero was well aware at the beginning of the secund arc of his growing feelings for Yuuki. And he was almost ready to confront her about this. Remember the near-kiss scene that made all Zekis cry in despair ? Yeah, that one.  

----> This is the one scene when Zero gets a little possessive and greedy, with romantic/cheesy lines. He understands fully that he loves Yuuki, after a traumatic dream where he basically lose Yuuki, and he doesn’t want to share her with Kaname or everyone else, romantically speaking. And he bent down to kiss her. Buuuut No. He got back of this on the last secund, claiming he was confused and feeling unwell.  You don’t have any excuses Zero. I feel like this is a very important scene of Zeki’s development in the first two arcs, and it is about being afraid of taking risks. He knew that Yuuki loved Kaname, and making that move would maybe endanger their links. But if he would have taken the risk at that time, it would have changed all the story. This kiss would have been more important that the one they shared before they leave the battlefield, after Rido’s death. If Yuuki had know sooner of Zero’s feelings, she might have taken the risk to defy Kaname’s decisions.  ----> However, despite all of those things, Zero and Yuuki had also strong things to keep them attached to each other. 

 ----> First, their need for each other. 

The most obvious of the two is Zero’s need for Yuuki. And that goes deeper that the mere need of blood. He needs Yuuki, to keep his sanity. She is the main pillar of his world, after Shizuka “destroyed” his family, his brother, everything he knew. She made him feel alive again. Without her, he is lost, just as Yuuki was lost when Kaname did some unclear things, as he was her saviour. Just as Kaname’s plans mean nothing if Yuuki is not longer here. Just as Yuuki needs Zero to be her support when she decide to discover what happened the night she lost her memories.  Just as Kaname needs Zero to protect his “Queen” and to defeat his enemies. Hino made a really good job about the characters needing each-other to survive through the different events. But the most “pure” need was Zero’s need for Yuuki, as he certainly meant no ill to her, or rather, it is the least manipulative need of them all. 

Explanations:

---> Yuuki needs for Kaname’s presence is influenced by his saviour image. While she needs him, he was the one who created the situation of danger she was 10 years ago. Clearly Kaname was manipulating the events so Yuuki would need more or less him to feel secure. 

----> Kaname’s need for Yuuki is, surprisingly similar to Zero’s need for Yuuki. She is the safety net to his sanity too. Except that for him, his want to erase Purebloods from the Earth’s ground was already in his mind millenias ago, way before Yuuki’s birth. Yuuki was almost his excuse to destroy the Purebloods, so he would create for her “a safe world to walk in.”Hem. 

----> Yuuki’s need of Zero to find the truth. Well. I do not often think that Yuuki manipulates people to get her way out the events, but I find it rather...unfitting of her to ask Zero to help her. When she indirectly told him that she knew that Kaname was keeping secrets from her but she didn’t mind being betrayed by him ( okay, Zero was eavesdropping, but that does count.) While Zero was happy to oblige, I really feel like she was using him, as it was an easier way than confronting her beloved Kaname. 

----> My favorite one. This need is the one that involved the most manipulations in the entire story. Kaname needed Zero to defeat Shizuka and Rido. The first time, Kaname killed the other pureblood and let Zero take the guilt, at least from the Senate’s point of view. The secund time, he had Zero kill Rido with him. Nothing strange with that. But when we learn in Arc 3 that Kaname planned to use the strenght of the Hunter twins to defeat Rido, and began to twist the events at his will  (including that he unleashed Shizuka so she could kill Zero’s parents) , that does shock more than one person. This literally does mean he let all the Shizuka’s event happen, destroy Zero and Ichiru’s lives, only to “shape” them the way he wanted to, before letting no choice to Zero but becoming stronger, and thus, devoring his own brother. HEM. 

Anyway, back to the point. Zero out of there had the most pure, least ill-intented need from all of those characters. This is pure longing for one person, and it is one of the many proofs that (Zero is the best cinnamon roll ever) Zero loves Yuuki in an unique way.  2) They were always here for each other. 

Because I didn’t see Kaname running over to save Yuuki when she needed it (only once, actually, in the town excursion’s chapter/ in season 2. And Zero was here too, to end a Level E’s life). I didn’t see him comforting Yuuki when she was confused about her feelings ( would have been hard, since he was the one messing with them). That was Zero. Zero was here to save her from the Level E, or from the Senate’s servants when one of them lifted a hand on her. He was always here first. Yuuki on her own way, tried to protect Zero from Shizuka and from his falling state to Level E, by trying to make a trade with Shizuka. On the psychological aspect, Yuuki helped Zero to cope with the murder of his parents. Even though he was still tormented by the memories, the girl certainly made it easier to accept what happened. As previously stated and explained, she helped him not to fall into madness.  

And that’s when we leave the two arcs. To summarize, Zero knew he was in love with Yuuki, Yuuki didn’t, things got complicated because of Zero’s Level E state and Kaname ‘s plans and a lot. A LOT. of things were left unsaid when Yuuki departs from Cross Academy.  I do think, however, that Hino wanted it that way, and she focused on Yuuki’s quest of identity, the main trio’s background, and of course, Yuuki’s link with Kaname, and this certainly forced the author to give them not their “end” they deserved, while giving them the development needed in the story  so they were a legit and a potential endgame couple of VK. Obviously, Hino likes testing our patience. And she knows how to make us yearn for some reasons to make our favorite couple legit, whether Yume or Zeki.  Whatever, we will move on the final part : one year after till the end of VK. I will only mention a few details from VKM, since I’m supposed to focus on the main series :)

ARC 3

Timeskip, 1 year after the events of Cross Academy battle. Yuuki is at Kuran Manor, with Kaname. No contacts with the outside world, she is learning to be a proper lady to assume her Pureblood figure in the vampire society. Zero is finally out of danger of becoming a Level E. He still studies at Cross Academy while hunting Levels E. He is in a good way to be designed as the next Head of the Hunter Guild.  At the beginning of the 11th Volume, it seems that Yuuki and Zero have complete, opposite roles in the story, and since Zero let Yuuki go with Kaname, the one who would be able to stand by her side for all eternity, It seemed that Yume was quite the endgame and the ending would be predictable.  I like to think of this turning point as a complete reset of the story. Yuuki holding a completely different role, Zero not endangered by his vampiric nature, the Senate is out.... A lot of things changed. And Hino took the opportunity to -torture us- play with the love triangle once more, as the Zeki couple was in a nasty position.  New arc, new complications for Yume couple. We will see how, despite their differences, Hino succeeded at bringing them together again.  1) Most evident part : the blood lust. 

The easy one. All vampires need blood in order to survive, it is a primal need to quench their thirst with another person. But as they develop feelings and a relationship between them, the need can easily turn into a want and a desire. They, little by little, only want the special person’s blood. They are still able to take blood from another person, but only their loved one’s will give them full satisfaction. That’s what happened to Yuuki and Zero.  ----> Zero, as I said, isn’t under the threat of becoming a Level E anymore. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t drink blood anymore. In fact, when the 3rd Arc begins, Headmasters visits Zero and saw him eat an awful portion of blood tablets. Moreover, Zero admits he is drinking the blood of the preys the Association assigned him.  I think this is a proof of his dependency on Yuuki’s blood. Now that the Level E problem is settled, the blood tablets, despite their awful taste, should be enough to quench his thirst, as they did with most of the Night Class members at Cross Academy. Instead, he needs to take some additionnal blood, so he could try to quench his thirst, because he can’t have a certain person’s blood.

----> Yuuki on her side, is also struggling with her own thirst, and several times, Hino does hint that Kaname’s blood is not enough for her. Himself makes the remark, saying she isn’t completely satisfied, and that’s because her heart is shared between him and “that another person in her heart”.  Secund time is when Aido surprised her near the Ancestor’s cave, shocked when he noticed she drank her own blood.  Again, she doesn’t have access to blood tablets, since Kaname forbad Aido to give her any, but her brother does give her his blood. Obviously he wasn’t going to starve her. So, if she does get blood in sufficient quantity, why would she have to drink her own blood ? If Kaname was the only vampire she loved, why couldn’t his blood give her full satisfaction ? Yuuki is in love or at least yearn for Zero, and she needs his blood to quench her thirst. 

(Little Aside : I just love how in VKM Hino doesn’t give any hints that Yuuki yearned for Kaname’s blood or that she wasn’t fully satisfied with Zero’s blood, whereas in Shirabuki arc, it was evident Yuuki needed Zero’s blood in add of Kaname’s. If I missed one hint that could undeceive me  , please do leave a note :) ) 2) Yuuki and her two identities. 

I think it played a great part in the love triangle’s ending. In the beginning of Arc 3 we see her have some kind of hallucinations, where her human self confronts her “vampire” self. That’’s an interesting moment, as we learn that Yuuki tries to conceal her vampire side. Somehow, she cannot bring herself to yield at the vampire desires : drink blood ( and by that, I mean using her fangs to draw the blood, a thing she didn’t do since the night of her transformation) and live for eternity by Kaname’s side.

The fact is she has spent most of her life being a human, under the sunlight, being a light-hearted girl with no underlying intentions. And then, she learns she is a royalty, leader of the vampires. We can see throughout the Arc 3 she isn’t comfortable around the aristocrats and the other purebloods, putting aside the ones she knows from the Cross Academy. The vampiric aristocracy is way too dark, sterile, with ulterior motives for her. She can pretend to play their game, as she does in VKM. But she will never be entirely in this society. She is way too “human” for this. ----> The way she was raised, with her beliefs in peace, and the fact she is unable to play like the others Pureblood, to manipulate as Kaname, Shizuka, Rido or Sara did, all of this demonstrates she can’t be the “perfect” Pureblood they expected her to be. All her education, lifestyle, attitude, personnality, beliefs : all of this push her towards her “human” self. She was way more happier when she didn’t know she was a Pureblood, when she could be carefree, not having to have a Pureblood composure : when she was with Zero.  I will close that part with a quote : Kaname said it himself. “Yuuki, you are more suited to be under the sunlight”. 

3) Kaname’s plans: 

Because Zeki wouldn’t have happened if Kaname didn’t ruin anything with his mad plans. Although all of those manipulations were “ for Yuuki, so she could have a brighter future”, in the process, he successfully hurt her and put her trust in him at stake. Even if she didn’t betray him in a direct way, she admitted she was shocked by the fact he “killed” Aido’s father.  This, the fact he wanted to kill all the pureblood instead of punishing the ones who actually did something wrong, when she learns he was the one who unleashed Shizuka and allowed the Kiryus’ murders to happen (for this she doesn’t have any reactions,  but that DOES count as a malus. ). Final fact ; he was the one who pushed Yuuki away, by letting her (finally ! ) out of the house with Artemis, so he could begin to track down the Pureblood. 

Those things put Yuuki’s trust in him down; little by little, she took an opposite side, facing her brother. And of course, of this same opposite side, there was Zero, who accepted her again so she could fight by his sides. They became allies for a while, after being separated for so long, and that pretty much give them the opportunity to be the Zeki pair we all know, again.  4) Protecting each other. 

Honestly, Zero was forced to take a wounded Yuuki when he met her there in the cemetery. Yuuki could have done just fine at going after Kaname and turning him into a human without erasing Zero’s memory. Zero didn’t have to give her his blood at Cross Academy. 

--------------->They want to protect each other, as they always did in this series. Well. I can’t deny Zero did a much better job to it than Yuuki. But I think it’s because she thought that herself was a danger to Zero, that he was better off not remembering what she is to him. However, even if that move was extreme, it started with a good intention. The point is, Zero was always the protective figure, his actions have always spoken for him : he would protect Yuuki at all costs, but if she wanted, she could fight too. Sure, he wants her safe, but he isn’t going make her endure his own will. Yuuki on the other side was always the comforting one, and it’s sad, because in this arc, that side of her was....tampered ?... Don’t know how to say that exactly.  ----------------> All of this led to their became close to each other again. By this time, Yuuki had realized she had feelings for both Zero and Kaname. Zero knew he was in love with her, but the events and the year without seeing each other complicated their relationship. Guess their ressemblance and affection for each other was stronger that their differences.  (Though I will admit Kaname did improve the things. Had he not wanted for them to be together, I don’t think Yuuki would have allowed herself to be with Zero. And Zero of course, selfless cinnamon, would have waited for her. Except she might not have come at all in the end. )

CONCLUSION (finally, congrats to those who read down the entire mess of ideas that was this post XD)

Zeki has been one hell of a ride, through the entire series. Friends, Family, Partners, Ennemies, Allies, Couple.... ---------> They went through many difficulties and hardships: both of them had difficults pasts and it took a lot of time for Zero to warn up to Yuuki. Kaname was a rather good obstacle himself. And of course, the fact that by being Hunter and Pureblood, they were the definition of ennemies.  ---------------------->But what helped them to overcame all of this is their affection/need for each other. Zero said it, if it wasn’t for Yuuki, he wouldn’t have make it through all those years. They are also very protective towards each other, I quote Yuuki “You look like the boy I wanted to protect but ended up hurting instead”

-------> They succeeded with their faith into each other, fighting and standing side to side, and no matter what would keep them away, they always reunited. Furthermore, I don’t think the story would have had as much relevance than now if Yuuki ended with Kaname. As he said, she is suited for the light, even if deep down, she is a Pureblood like him. When he identifies himself as the “ Darkness”, it wouldn’t have been logical for her to stay with Kaname. He saw this, and he let her go, so she could be happier with Zero, the one who would be able to let her in the sunlight.

In the 93rd chapter, the finale, Yuuki  states she has lived a life full of happiness with Zero, and that she wished to Kaname to find this same happiness under the sunlight.  This ending couldn’t have been better, And in this ending, Yuuki and Zero were destined to each other from volume 1. Zeki is endgame. Even if they are so frustrating with their tendencie to take the things REALLY slow; I can’t even. 

(and if Kaname could see it, well, there isn’t much left to say XD)

I’M DONE. Well. that just took 3 hours. As I said in the first part, please, no flames. This is me trying to be objective and giving facts.  I don’t know if I will make a “Kaze” part. Would be interesting, but I’m tempted to do some character’s analyse, with a psychological approach of their actions. Guess we will see what will come out the first XD