Aita - Tumblr Posts

( 🍤 for tracking purposes. And this is a different POV from an earlier situation.)

Am I the jerk for confronting a shopkeeper over his scummy business practices?

Ugh. Can’t believe I’m doing this. But I’m hiding out from some monsters right now, and it’s better than doing nothing.

I (M, idk and idc. Young I guess?) used to be a part of this dumb kids show. I only participated because I was bored. Not because I wanted to teach kids or anything. Teaching lessons is so boring!!! Where was I going with this? Oh yeah. I had to work with my fellow toons and interact with kids and stuff. And I’m sure you can tell how I felt towards them all.

To tell you the truth, I actually liked it when people stopped showing up at our home, cuz’ then I didn’t have to be a part of the show anymore. The only problem was when toons started going crazy for no apparent reason. We called these guys Twisteds (this is relevant later.)

Out of all the toons, the one I probably dislike the most would be D (M, don’t care. 5 or 6?) D runs a supply shop which is all fun and dandy, but I noticed that he rarely had good stuff for sale. Just useless junk food and cheap trinkets.

It didn’t help that he only accepted VHS tapes. Those things are hard to get, man! And his prices were seriously inflated. After the umpteenth time of getting tapes just to find he had nothing good in stock, I knew something had to be done.

So as any rational toon would, I snuck into the back of D’s shop when he went on a scavenging mission. If he thinks he’s gonna get ME to work my butt off just to buy some junk he thought wrong! Anyways, I start ‘borrowing’ his extra tapes (he had boxes and boxes of the things!) when D shows up again.

He starts YELLING at me to drop the tapes, to which I said no. I told him that he was saving all of the good items for himself, and that his prices were unfair. I wish I could have taken a photo of his face!! The smug, proud D pushed off of his high horse. If I didn’t do it, then surely someone else would eventually.

Dangit. Going on a side tangent again. So I was messing with D, and he kept trying to snatch the tape out of my hand.

To further tease him (as “friends” do), I push a shelf, causing a big box to fall over. Surprise surprise, it’s full of tapes. But D stopped going after me at that point. He just. Froze. And kneeled down by the box of spilled tapes. As the others enter the room to see what the heck is going on, I’m briefly considering if what I did was too much.

That consideration was short lived, as D freaking twisted in front of our eyes!! Twisted? Twist-ified? I dunno!! But he turned into a monster, and beat the stuffing outta me!! This one girl and these twins who I tolerate (F, and both M. They’re both like 5) managed to calm D down, before another guy knocked him out. But not before me, and a few others, were seriously injured. Who knew an angry flower could pack such a punch?!

…I didn’t stick around much longer, especially when D started waking up. Everyone was glaring at me and refusing to even come near, so I knew I wasn’t welcome anymore. Fine by me. I never liked them anyways, and it didn’t help that they all took D’s side. I’ve been wandering the lower levels of our home in search of a place to stay, and now you’re all caught up. So am I really the jerk for messing with D in the first place? I still think he could have run his shop better.

Edit: quit asking what floor im on its not like im gonna tell you. Its also gotten hard to type so no nore edits

Edit 2: MY MOUGTH IS GON WHWRE IS MY MOUTH

Yeah my name is Tim, short for OpTIMus Prime

Tell your friend respectfully to stop it. Stand your ground and don't be afraid to have some boundaries in your friendships.

WIBTA if I bluntly told my friend to stop informing me about my own culture?

For context: I am Malaysian-Chinese, but I immigrated to the US when I was a really young age (like younger then 3). My friend is a second gen Chinese person. I'll call them A. I've been friends with them for a couple of years, and I would say we're close friends (although they might disagree)

However, recently I've started noticing that A keeps trying to inform me about Chinese culture? For example, I brought up Chang'e once, and A just started explaining the entire story to me. That's one of the more explicit times though—most of the time it just feels very subtle. Like they'll start explaining to me about how valued hard work is in Chinese culture, despite the fact that I am also Chinese and therefore (probably) know about that value. Or when a someone talks in Mandarin, A will translate what that person is saying to me, even though I can listen fluently. All in all, it feels like A will talk about their culture like I'm a outsider to it.

I don't exactly know why A does this, though I feel like they're not doing this on purpose. There's some part of me that feels like A acts like this because I do not look stereotypically Asian (I have darker skin then most East-Asians as I'm Malaysian), but I do want to give them benefit of the doubt.

It really bothers me, because I am very insecure about my culture as my family aggressively tried to assimilate when we immigrated. But I also feel like I might just be overblowing this problem or reading into A's intentions too deeply. Additionally, I don't know if I want to confront A about this because I am extremely blunt when it comes to this sort of stuff and I don't want to hurt A's feelings. They're going through a rough spot right now, and I really do not want to make them snap.

What are these acronyms?

AITA for not telling my friend she's tone-deaf?

I (17f) have been attending a weekly theatre group for the last 10 1/2 years. My friend, B (17f) joined about four years ago and we were quickly fast friends.

The club focuses on musical theatre, like singing, acting and dancing, and we have lessons in all three every week. I'm one of the kids who has been there the longest and have basically grown up there, so I've got quite good at being able to figure out the difference between a lack of confidence, a lack of practice or something else. My mother is also tone-deaf and I hear her singing plenty of times to know what the difference sounds like. I figured out B was tone-deaf about a year and a half into her time at the club.

I have nothing against anyone tone-deaf and I personally take no issue with it. The club isn't very serious or hardcore and is mostly just a way to hang out with people your age and have fun on stage. I don't care if anyone is really good or really bad, I just hope they try their best and have fun, so B's singing abilities don't bother me. She's an amazing actress and plenty of fun.

The issue stems from two things. 1) some of the other kid sin the group are noticing she's bad at singing or at least isn't singing 'properly', and 2) she wants to be a singer and has no idea she's tone-deaf and can't hit the notes she wants.

I'm worried one day someone will tell her very untactfully that she's bad at singing and won't make a career out of it, or worse, actually mock her for her abilities. She loves singing and is passionate about music. My mother told me not to tell her, as she herself was never able to forgive the person to ruin singing for her, but i don't know if i should keep quiet bc im scared someone will be cruel not kind.

aita?

What are these acronyms?

& assholes will be guillotined. NTAs will be free to go. ✌

in 2024 we will replace the supreme court with r/aita

am i in the wrong?

when on the first day of my job, this one girl ignoring me even tho i ask her for something, and when i smile at her, she just look at me and look away. and when she jokes around with her friends, she gives a flat resting face to me.

And i hate her now. My boss said "well maybe she just had a bad day, you should try to just be considerate of her feelings." One week there, and she hasn't change.

Am i wrong for hating her and expecting a little bit of kindness?!!!

oh mind you, we have a similar job desk, and we have to kinda cooperate. so i have to deal with her the whole fcking time. and "bE NiiCe" to her.

my mother makes everything about her.

I was really depressed, i don't wanna have any interaction, and she thought i was being disrespectful, and told my aunt about it.

I can't even be emotional for one fckng moment without being called disrespectful.

I need peace for fuck sake. Not her overdramatic issues.

aita for following my instructions

I (14M) got invited to a murder mystery themed birthday party on a really fancy train, as I was minding my buisness the "staff" gave me a blowdart and told me to target someone specifically and I did just that, everyone's just going "seriously? a blowdart?" what else was I gonna use

AITA for going fast?

I (15h) gotta!!!!!!

Easter: Am I ungrateful (AITA)

I know this is not reddit (and it is around 2am where I live), but I need opinions.

Background info that maybe important:

In the past me and my siblings would always get the same amount of treats in our basket. Used to be about 7?, than 5, now 3. Not really that important.

We have been trying to spend less as we have been spending too much

My mom is like me, forgetful

My brother went on his 4th trip and just got back (is it important that me and my sister have not gone on one yet?)[I think it is because my brother is a brat 70% of the time and we go together like oil and water.]

I am not a fan of jellybeans (parents know)

Story:

I woke up early as I cannot sleep, having had sleeping problem for the past few nights. I went down to see my basket. I expected to see one or two big things as A) that is what happened in the past and B) My brother got an expensive magnifying glass (got it early for the trip). Nope, all small. That is ok, two were Stitch themed (Plushy and blind bag) and a ML Kwamii box. But I notice that my brother got a Lego set. While we got the same amount, way more money went to my brother's basket. I was pretty upset already. Than I notice jellybeans. I know my mom was probably tired/forgot, but it hurts that I told her prior that I do not want jellybeans and told her and she promise that I would not get any and she did not correct me when I told my brother that I would be getting a bag of my favorite Easter candy, Cadbury milk chocolate eggs. The fact my bother went on a trip, got two over $20/15 presents while my and my sister got $5 and my preference was ignored/forgotten hurts. But other people have it worse so I think I am being ungrateful. Am I being ungrateful? Would an extra small toy be too much to ask for? (All the gifts are meaningful and I am happy with what I got)

Tldr: Brother went on a three day trip and got two big presents while me and my sister got small presents (all are things we like) and my non-jellybean preference got ignored. Am I ungrateful that I am upset?

(I am happy that I found out now, so I won't cry in front of my parents [mostly dad] who would 100% say I should be more grateful.)

I love this so much

Publishing this on a side blog so that any followers with bpd and/or who are trans don’t have to see this nasty pile of horse shit. I’m actually hoping this was a fake story someone put on here to spice up the asks, though I’m gonna be real, if it is, I don’t think blatant transphobia or this disgusting and misleading prejudice against people with bpd is a good one to pick to fake, but that’s just my two cents.

Addressing first the most obvious issue: this was literally none of your business. You are protecting him from… what? Someone who MIGHT not be bi-gender? That alone cannot make Mike fall for him, and if he’s that serious already, then it sounds like it IS a bit deeper. Therefore, I’m not sure what you actually think you’re protecting Mike from, aside from maybe high expectations for you as a person.

Further, your evidence for her lying seems tied up in her bpd. Yes, lying and manipulation can happen, but if you really think that gives you an excuse to doubt and pick apart anything and everything Anne says, then congrats, you misunderstood what you read and are actually just contributing to bpd myths. Have you ever actually caught Anne in a lie? Or has he just admitted that he lied in the past before starting treatment for bpd? Because those are two very different things, and even if she HAS lied before to you, that doesn’t guarantee that he’s lying THIS time. So, sure, take things with a grain of salt if you’ve actually caught Anne lying regularly, but deciding that she’s lying right now with zero evidence (which I’ll expand on in the next few paragraphs) about something that is entirely personal is not actually a good response to respectfully navigating your friendship with someone with bpd (and frankly, I don’t think you have ever counted as a friend to Anne. You even talk about him with so much disdain I can’t believe you ever considered her to be more than some fucked up charity case, and she probably would’ve been better off never meeting you, if I’m honest, because I’m sure dealing with your prejudice has left scars).

Finally, you seem to be under the impression that you need to transition to be trans… and even if that were true, switching pronouns does, in fact, count as transitioning (signed, a trans person who hasn’t even built up the courage to do that yet—this world is NOT kind to those visibly in transition, and I imagine trying to navigate the horrid depressive episodes that come with bpd while actively fearing for your safety because you’re visibly trans might be too fucking much to bear all at one time). Moreover, the fact that Mike is the only one who uses he/him for Anne even after he asked for the rest of you to is a sign that YOU ALL are the transphobic assholes, not Anne. The fact that you don’t even understand this but somehow think you’re a good ally?? Buddy, you know being a good ally means that people you don’t like will be trans and you do have to respect them, right? And other trans people can be just as nasty about gatekeeping those they don’t like as cis people? Other trans people can’t actually spot the “fakers” like you seem to think. And, shocker, it gets leveled at someone with a severely stigmatized mental illness, who are already more vulnerable members of the trans community.

Now, the easiest (and pettiest) dig would be the most obvious: that you’re literally just jealous Mike didn’t want you but wants Anne, and you’re using psuedo-woke language (e.g., calling her potential lies “gaslighting” even though you have not established that he regularly engages in abusive behavior or has an abusive pattern with Mike, in general assuming that a symptom of bpd justifies you getting to pick and choose what you believe, framing Anne as a manipulator and abuser without actually providing examples of him ever doing those things to you or someone you know) to justify sabotaging the relationship. And, as I’ve pointed out, you aren’t being “woke” and protecting your trans friend—you’re actively telling him that you don’t trust his judgement and ability to determine his level of safety in a relationship and that he needs you to protect him from himself… which is not “kind” like you seem to think it is. And the fact that you “called him before she could so she couldn’t gaslight him” after bombarding Anne with this bullshit seems like you’re the one trying to do the gaslighting. You actually think the person who gets a word in first is the one who will be believed? Or the one who gets to dictate reality? Someone who respects their friend’s ability to critically think wouldn’t need to try to set the narrative before anyone else gets a say.

For real—take a hard look at yourself because this reeks of an inability to look at Anne as a complex human being outside his mental illness, which is far more dangerous than any damage a “fake” trans person is going to inflict, even in a relationship with a trans person… especially since it seems like Mike has no trouble identifying toxicity in relationships, as he justifiably cut you off when you displayed a shocking lack of empathy toward him and his partner. You really need to leave them alone and figure out how to navigate your future relationships respectfully. Stop trying to “deal” with this situation and take some time to really learn about bpd before you inflict yourself on anyone else with the disorder.

Side note: I typed all this out and reread it again just to make sure I wasn’t jumping to conclusions and holy fuck it was actually worse the second time. “They immediately hit it off, or should I say she clung to him and pretended to have the same likes and dislikes whenever they were alone I assume.” I ASSUME. So you don’t actually know what all Anne and Mike actually have in common. You’ve just decided that she’s a crazy bipolar wild child and therefore couldn’t possibly be deep enough for introverted Mike. Also you bombarded Anne with six people all accusing him of lying and manipulating someone she’s clearly in love with because… she doesn’t seem trans enough for you? Or worse, is too bipolar for you to trust that he isn’t lying? Even though YOU KNOW the horrid things people have said and done to Anne because of his bpd in the past?? Holy fuck. Genuinely, wtf is wrong with you??

aita for calling out someone for being manipulative towards a trans friend? Names have been changed for privacy reasons and TLDR at the end because this is long.

I (24f) am cis but have had a lot of trans friends (binary, nonbinary, and neopronoun) throughout the years and am very supportive so i take this very seriously. So I met this girl my first year in college (we were 18 at the time) and we became friends. We're polar opposites, she talks a lot and I don't, she parties a lot and I like to do more sophisticated things, she's a typical extrovert basically, and I'm more introverted. Anne (24f) was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I don't know when, she just told me this years ago. I've seen tiktoks about bpd and researched Google about bpd a little so I know all about how they have fave persons and will "mimic" people in the friend group and become clingy, manipulate, etc. I've seen pics of her in high school, noticed that she was a theater kid, she said she was good at acting and even said she thinks her bpd helped with her acting although I'm not sure how, but she said she only joined the theater club because a boy she had a crush on was in theater. That should've been my first red flag but I was naive. She has a degree in something else (not theater) because our second year in college her favorite character in a TV show did a certain job, she got interested in that, and now she also does that as a living. She doesn't talk about her bpd, she's only mentioned it a handful of times. I can count on one hand how many times. And I get it because she said someone once told her people with bpd should be sterilized and not be allowed near children. Which is really messed up and I hate that someone said that.

However on with the situation. One of our friends Mike (25m) is a trans man. We met him four years ago. He's very handsome, broody, introverted, intelligent, great listener, very accepting and understanding, similar to me but opposite to her. Now we didn't know he was trans until two years ago, because I asked him on a date and he turned me down, and when I asked why he told me that he was mostly T4T and only viewed me as a friend. We were like woah you're trans, okay that's cool, etc. He explained that he was lucky enough to get on puberty blockers and transition young etc which is why he passes. I said okay I'm not trans and you're mostly T4T fair enough.

Well last year Anne suddenly tells us that she is trans too. She says she's bigender. She says she is okay with either she her or he him because she feels like a man and a woman at the same time. Some days she's a woman, some days she's a man, and some days she's both, according to her. She says she does not like they them pronouns. Suddenly her and Mike are spending all this extra time together. Last month he confided in me that he thinks he's in love with her, after years of him only seeing her as a friend, and then they started officially dating.

Here's the problem: she has not changed her outward appearance, her name, started any kind of medical stuff, joined any groups, bought a binder etc. We all continue to call her she and her because she fully presents as female and doesn't have a problem with it. Also she's very effeminate in body language, the way she talks, etc. I know technically I could call her a he or a him, too, but she never asks me to or corrects people when they call her she because well technically she is a she too. Mike is the only one who uses he and him pronouns with her as often as she and her, but she has never thanked him. It really feels like she's saying she's trans and then going about her life exactly as a cis woman simply to convince Mike to date her.

First off, Anne and Mike are NOT compatible. She likes to party, smoke weed, talks a lot, I'm not sure how she graduated with such good grades or why she does so well in her job because she is honestly a LOT to handle and I'm saying that as nice as possible. Mike would never touch weed or go to clubs and he says he would be fine staying home while she does those things but how could you trust someone to party while high and not hook up with others? I've seen her make out with five people in one night at a frat party. They also had wildly different childhoods, such as she grew up in a conservative community and doesn't speak to her family, and he grew up in a liberal area and is close with his family. But more importantly she has a history of joining theater because she had a crush on someone in theater (plus she admits she is good at acting, so maybe she is acting now?) and getting a degree and job in a field because a favorite fictional character did that and now this? It feels like she was attracted to him, found out he usually dates other trans people, and found a way to continue being cis but claim to be trans without having to do anything trans related, basically mimicing her favorite person. As soon as they met they hit it off, or should I say she clung to him and pretended to have the same likes and dislikes whenever they were alone I assume.

It sounds terrible I know, which is why I discussed this with a group chat first that neither of them are in, and the group chat not only agreed that she is far too "obnoxious" for him (those were NOT my words!) but that she is faking being trans in an attempt to make him fall in love with her (which seems to be working.) I would NEVER have gone further without making sure with them first. So then a few of the people in my group chat and I held an intervention with Anne alone. The six of us (the others don't live close enough to come) met up with Anne at her place and told her what she was doing was wrong and gross and that she needed to get help for her bpd and to stop catfishing Mike. She didn't take well to what was said, which I anticipated, but she went crazy. She was screaming at us, insulting us, sobbing while yelling etc, literally said if we ever contacted her again she would call the cops, so we left.

I immediately called Mike before she could and asked him to meet me at a restaurant nearby and that it was very important. Since Mike doesn't know anyone in the group chat I went alone and I explained EVERYTHING before she could gaslight and manipulate him even further. He left, did not finish or pay for his food. I messaged him several times, but a few hours later he texted me to never to speak to him again, and then blocked me on everything. I showed up to his house and Anne was there. Mike said if I ever contacted him again he would get a restraining order on me so I left. I've discussed this with the group chat and now suddenly half of them changed their mind and don't want to talk about it anymore. Several of them left the group chat. Not only that but several of my friends who know either Mike or Anne or both have blocked me on everything. When I've tried to contact these friends through other means and explain everything, they either didn't respond or said for me never to contact them again because I was being transphobic. Listen I know under NORMAL circumstances you shouldn't question when someone comes out but this is NOT a normal situation, and now I am concerned Anne is unsafe for Mike but also an unsafe person to know, as she literally is trying to destroy my life because I called her out on some seriously messed up and abusive behavior.

TLDR am I the asshole for trying to protect my trans friend from a potential stalker?

What are these acronyms?

I told my man all I wanted for my birthday was a life size plush of him and he said that was weird. AITA if I hit him with my car?

god, typing: AITA

AITA for getting someone fired? (this is gonna sound like a rant and i’m sorry in advance)

I. Fucking. Hate. My. Boss. he thinks he’s so fucking smart, like i hate to break it to you pal but you’re just human like the rest of us.. you can be dumb sometimes (dumb often, in fact!!) not even mentioning how disrespectful he is to those lower down the ladder. really out here thinking he knows our jobs better than we do like ?? hello ??????

anyway, so i was venting to one of my friends who also works there (outside of work hours, obviously), and we decided to kind of go to HR about it because he is making the work environment so awful (i would leave just cause of him but the pay is worth it).

HR says they’ve already had complaints about him but everyone’s afraid to do something on their own, so we start making a sort of paper trail and talking to managers about him, etc.

managers surprisingly agree to have a meeting about him, so we all show up and they were maybe a little harsh? this isn’t super relevant but he did kinda fuck my mum at one point so i maybe had a built up resentment of him lol

so, aita for kinda stabbing my coworker in the back? (literally, haha, we stabbed him like 23 times…)

What are these acronyms?

AITA for not learning how to do the laundry and making my someone else do it for me?

I (32m) have been with my best friend since 2009. When we met I had barely left home, where my mom would do my laundry. He and I went to different universities. My uni had a public laundry, but he had his own washing machine. So as an excuse to hang out I would take my laundry over to his place and he would help me with it. Fast forward and we are still together but I've only recently started to wash my own clothes. I made the mistake of posting a funny text conversation where I asked him how to wash jeans. Everybody started making fun of me and saying it's ridiculous that I'm just now learning how to do my own laundry. I feel like we're all doomed if we pick apart other people's relationships like this, but it still made me self-conscious.

What are these acronyms?

AITA for this disagreement with some of my friends/colleagues?

So I(40s F) used to work in local level government. I quit to pursue other career opportunities because of burnout, but they asked me to stay on in an official-unofficial advisory capacity, and I'm still pretty close with the current office holders, particularly the current occupant of my former office (A, 30s X). Their boyfriend (H, 30s M), who also works there, isn't fond of me but more or less tolerates me when they're around, which is okay enough. Both their job and my current one necessitate a lot of travel, so it's not often an issue.

Things run pretty smoothly, overall, and I do think the entire city council has the people's best interests at heart. However, recently a natural disaster devastated our area and caused a lot of disagreement over how best to deal with it, and frankly the proposal that was eventually put forward was an awful one that would return a privileged few (about 25% of the population, after estimating numbers) to a semblance of normalcy while neglecting the other 75%. Neither A nor I are willing to back the group's play on this one, for what I feel are obvious reasons. A has gone completely no contact with all of us and I don't even know where they are right now, which aside from worrying me a lot, also hurt my position in the discussion since I officially hold no office anymore.

So I took pretty decisive action to stop them, and now three of our original council (H, plus other members E and L) are extremely pissed off at me and are trying to rally the rest to oppose me, while making some extremely shortsighted and harmful moves in the process that will hurt a lot of people. They don't seem to care, however. It's like they consider the majority lesser human beings and only care about that privileged 25%. I don't think I did everything right, but I did my best. We have to let go of the past and make the best of what we have now, for everyone's sake. No more shall man have wings to bear him to paradise. Henceforth, he shall walk.

AITA for sundering reality into fourteen reflections to stop my coworkers? Or should they have accepted that their paradise is gone, and ceded the reflections to their new fragmented, imperfect inhabitants?

What are these acronyms?

i am sick and tired of people being mad at me when i adhere to plans that they made with or without them.

yesterday, my flatmate told me that we could go to pick my headphones up from a friend at 12:20, and then go to the mall, and then i would be back home before i had to go to work at 4. if we all went, we would drive, so the commute to and from the mall would only be 20 minutes each way.

but this flatmate has a terrible terrible habit of agreeing to do things and then just,,, not doing them. so i thought i would create a backup plan that involved public transport. the public transport is 50 minutes each way.

i was ready to leave. she was still in bed. so i left. i picked up my headphones. and went to the mall. shopped. got a muffin. and now i’m on the bus back home. and she just texted me “girl you just bussed past me what the fuck are you doing”

what am I doing ??? what we agreed to girl ???? j couldn’t wait any longer for them!! i knew i needed to allow time to get home and get ready ti go to work.

why is she allowed to be mad at me ??????

I love toxic yaoi. I LOVE YAOI!!! 🤣😂

new ep was great i love toxic yaoi

NTA

I'm gonna need to remember this prompt for when I'm having a bad day