Ad Mortuum - Tumblr Posts
8 years ago
Garrulous Blue Herons are masters of ambush chats and long-term conversational tactics. Capable of holding one-sided conversations for an astonishing eight hours or more, these horribly dull herons never quite seem to realise how restless or uninterested their conversational partner is. Experts in the field of Ornithobehaviourology believe this may be a holdover from their ancestors, who are thought to have hunted by literally boring their prey to death.
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remember i was telling you about the stationery equipment i ordered from the kind man who does those youtube videos about cooking in the
eighteenth century that i was watching because theres just nothing good on past midnight anymore not like when we were younger and you could
just turn on comedy central and get high but noooo nowadays you have to keep clean for drug tests and those comedians arent as funny sober
so you resort to watching a dude dress up like hes from colonial times and hear about how you can store farm-fresh eggs in a barrel of
limewater without refrigeration for a whole year which was very surprising to me but then again most things are since i am a drop-out so as
i was saying the stationery stuff is so cool i've got a stamp with an eagle on it which i was very upset about because honestly i am a heron
and not an eagle but really now you cant expect to win everything especially at this price point and honestly i always kind of wanted to be
an eagle so its almost fitting but on the other hand i paid out the ass for this paper i did the calculations and if it was sold by the ream
et cetera
ad mortuum