You Know? Today I Woke Up And Decided Angst. So I Present To You The Barest Outlines Of A Songfic For

You know? Today I woke up and decided angst. So I present to you the barest outlines of a songfic for the song It Took Me By Surprise, but instead of Bakugo's viewpoint being the song, it's Izuku's.

Warning: Victim Blaming Themself/Self Blame

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I would react badly

To the slightest hint of hesitance

("Hey do you want to play heroes today?" Izuku asked, eyes flitting to Bakugo. Bakugo frowns, contemplating. "It's okay if you don't want to, really, we can play tag or hide and seek or pillow forts or-")

(Izuku as a kid going back on his words if Bakugo waits too long to answer, because of his insecurity and empathy. Think after Bakugo got his quirk but before Izuku got his diagnosis)

He'd bend awkwardly to suit my mood

No word from his defense

("Shut up! Of course I want to play heroes! Stupid Deku". Bakugo stood up, stomping over to the playground. "Are you coming or not?!")

(He feels as though Bakugo only chose the first one because he felt obligated to because that is what Izuku would do)

I'd cry knowing how my tears

Felt like acid burning through his skin

("Stop crying, stupid nerd! It's just a scrape. You'll be fine!" Bakugo leans down, eyebrows furrowed, and holds out a hand. "We're going to be heroes and heroes don't cry about getting injured. Come on!" After Izuku gets up and starts following Bakugo again, Bakugo's shoulders untense and his eyebrows relax.)

(He believes that it is his fault for not holding back his tears because he knows it hurts Bakugo to see him cry)

Pushed every little button

But the right one that would let me in

(Blames himself for not being able to react/read Bakugo’s feelings correctly)

Now he's afraid of me

Now he's afraid of me

(Bakugo pushes him away and his attempts to help because Bakugo is afraid to need help, to been seen as weak)

It took me by surprise

The hatred in his eyes

(Izuku remembering the first time Bakugo said he hated him, and meant it)

I've pushed this man as far as he could go

But he lacked the words to let me know

(Bakugo being too mad to gets his thoughts out You-You- You motherfu! I’m not- I’m not weak! Leave me alone!)

He acted out, now I can see it is my fault

(Izuku being pushed to the ground by Bakugo)

I made changes

That went unnoticed

Sang songs for deaf ears

(Izuku apologizing, Izuku getting out of the way, Izuku leaving him alone, Izuku changing his favorite things so Bakugo wouldn’t feel copied))

He mistook my silence for punishment

(Bakugo thinking that Izuku is doing this because he thinks Izuku looks down on him)

As it had been all these years

(Bakugo showing a consistent belief in this as they grow up)

I'd cry knowingly how my tears felt like acid burning through his skin

(Izuku crying even though he thinks himself weak for doing it because he knows it bothers Bakugo and then later he knows that Bakugo gets mad when he cried)

Now he's afraid of me

Now he's afraid of me

(Izuku knows that Bakugo sees him as a threat, even if he doesn’t know why)

It took me by surprise

The hatred in his eyes

(Izuku remembering Bakugo’s hatred during the U.A. finals/ first battle)

I've pushed this man as far as he could go

But he lacked the words to let me know

He acted out, now I can see it is my fault

(Izuku feeling as though his question in the Finals was a push too far, and that Bakugo only punched him because he could not articulate how he felt. Him feeling responsible for Bakugo’s actions in the rest of the finals)

You know that one post about the girl (I think?) who sells her soul to Satan for a friend, and then Satan is attached? Consider I make it worse. What if Satan didn't put a time limit on that, simply because he(today Satan is a he) is patient. And he is attached, and doesn't really want her in Hell, but he can't cancel it, so he settles for letting her live a long life. However, what if the girl didn't tell him that she had a brain tumor/incurable disease and she wanted to get her bucket list done before she died with someone, but she didn't have any friends. And so Satan and her hang out every few days, but she hides her illness because she doesn't want her friend to worry. Then something happens, and Satan needs to go do something for a month or so, about four years after she sold her soul. And he comes back to find her in a coma. And he finds he can't do anything. But he doesn't know how long it will take before they decide to pull the plug. So he has to wait, and watch her slowly waste away. It takes sixth months, and by the end, she is as thin as a sheet of paper. When she pops into his throne room later in the day, the first thing he asks is "Why didn't you tell me?" And her response is "There was nothing that could be done, and I didn't want to worry you."

Fav Story Ideas to read or wish I could read:

Sakura oneshots where she realizes that ’Team 7’ was not good for her, and moves on, whether before the time jump, or after Sai and Yamato join

Sakura as someone who’s mindset is changed after Wave mission, (no one has to realize it though) and works harder and surprises everyone in the Chuunin exams? Or, alternatively, is not a medic? Like: Genjutsu expert? Sensor? Senbon?

Midoriya oneshots where he is connecting with other traumatized children, and them finally going ‘oh, he gets me because he was me’ or he realizes that his and Bakugos relationship is not okay or healthy and his redemption should not be through silence. or Midoriya and teacher trauma.

Oc stories where the OC isn’t overpowered and the canon characters are realistically portrayed. Alternatively, OC characters in the canon universe with little to no interaction with canon characters

Vigilante Midoriya fics where he isn’t just snarky with coffee, sleep problems and trauma and in the 1A Hero Course. (Like yes, that is good, but what about other UA courses? normal schools, online schools? What about a Vigilante who can’t help fight fight, so he always makes sure to get the victim out, or waits until after the mugging (but only mugging specifically) and identitifies them and sends that to the police, but first makes sure the victims okay? What about having gone towards the Hero Course and been rejected by Toshinori, and that’s why he never believes Eraserhead? Or, you know, switching it up from Eraserhead to Midnight: undercover work? or Naomasa: texting/leaving paper nicely and without snarky comments -like Izuku literally doesn’t know what could be wrong about this? Or Present Mic: Present Mic sees Izuku in Vig. form taking care of a mugging victim/is the mugging victim and wants to know who he is because that is great hero work on the internship , but can’t find him, and so he gets really into it?

(In essence, I want soft not-‘illegal’ ’vigilante’ Midoriya who uses his First Aid Training/EMT training at night for the benefit of others, drinks tea (black, green, grey?) and is confused why people are trying to find his identity “Its not that important?”)

Sakura x anyone other than Naruto, Sasuke, Itachi (sometimes) and Ino (Ino is great but variety?)

Any plot based Zabuza fic? Ever? Sasuke Bashing, All Might Bashing, Canon Eraserhead bashing (but only canon, not fanon), Sir Nighteye Bashing, Nagisa’s mom bashing, Korosensei bashing (but only slightly because of God of Death’s backstory), Nedzu bashing (sometimes) Shinsou bashing (also only in address to his judgement of others based off their quirk: like literally thought his quirk would carry him through all matches and did nothing to prepare? Assumed that Midoriya’s life was perfect? And Todorokis? And doesn’t hate Bakugo? Or see any trauma signs/toxic relationships signs in Bakugo/Midoriya’s relationship at ALL?) MHA plot bashing, Naruto gov bashing, Kakashi bashing (but depends), Mineta bashing, Jiraiya bashing, Afo bashing -dumb plans and dumb manipulation potato man, and HPSC bashing, Mary Sue bashing,

Hagakure time! or Hatsume time!

Assasination Classroom shenanigans with Karasuma,

The Losers, but as a group and shenanigans happen. Consider the one with Mary Sue bashing.

Jensen getting mad and kicking butt because someone hurt his friends and thought he was the weak link

Sakura time travel fics (either wakes up in younger body, or wakes up as thrown back in time, still in her body) , Naruto time travel fics (thrown back in time, still adult body) Apocalypse Midoriya time travel fics (like Nomu apocalypse, usually w/o quirk)

Missing nin Sakura

Librarian Midoriya

Actually nice Bakugo and Midoriya background but Midoriya is still quirkless and Bakugo knows this

Villain Bakugo - from Midoriya perspective, but Class 1A and Izuku are still heroes

Bakugo with Ofa and Midoroya still quirkless and Midoriya knows that All Might had done this (he either guessed from Rooftop scene or he was forced to give it up) and he resents, but does nothing because what is he supposed to do?

Finally: Manga crossovers that make one person seem shady because of their skills, but its really just because they were involved with the other world

His grandma always said "The world is hard on us dreamers". And as Izuku watches the number one hero, his hero, bound off into the distance, disapproving words still ringing in his head, he can almost hear her say "That's why you need to build your spine out of steel. Don't let them entinguish your flames". "Okay grandma" Izuku promised, echoing his response from so long ago, "I won't let them stomp me out".

Random Thoughts: Persephone and Hades Pt 1

The classics portray Persephone as a maiden, pure, who was kidnapped and tricked by Hades and was forced to become The Queen of the Underworld for Sixth Months. But that has a lot of things wrong with it.

So let's turn that in its head. Hades is not one for petty games and crimes and lack of empathy and thought like Zues, nor is he uncontrollable and everchanging and volitile like Posiden. Instead, he is just and he is fair. He has to believe that life is precious in order for the murders and abusers to be sent to the Fields of Punishment. He has to be caring about others to give those that did good things a place in the Islands of Paradise and give them a chance to be reborn when they tire of it. He has to be kind to make the dead forget their life in the Fields of Eislym so that they will not spend their time dead waiting and grieving and hurting.

So when the apathetic (he has to be apathetic or he will fall apart) Thanatos picks you up from whence you were, you will not find a malevolent God of the Dead, you will not find someone who will look down on you from a throne, you will find a man who sits next to you on a soft couch or bed, and he will turn to you and say "Tell me everything" And he will listen, and he will get mad at the injustices and happy for you successes. And when you are done, when you have spilt every second of your life from your lips, he will hug you and give you a choice. To choose to rest, or to wait and try again. And when you step out the door of that safe place with the fireplace and the blankets, he will remember you. And he will not judge.

Hades is not the hand of Death, nor is he the creeping cold. He is not that which burns or that which drowns. He is the soft comfort of silence after a long day. He is the inviting dark and the cover of dark that reveals the stars. He is the quiet of old dusty and forgotten libraries. He is a friend. Thanks

Ah the real reason I joined is that I had a plot bunny…

or many…