I'm Not Sure What I Find More Disconcerting: The Knowledge That Mr. Ratburn And I Have Rather Similar

I'm not sure what I find more disconcerting: the knowledge that Mr. Ratburn and I have rather similar blogs, or the fact that I'm completely ok with that.

The dark days before People Magazine told us all we need to know about American celebrities

Jiggery, Pokery,

Abraham Lincoln did

Marry a woman they

Called Mary Todd.

Though Abe loved all of her

Idiosyncrasies,

Many Americans

Found her quite odd.

You know that bitter nail polish people wear when they're trying to stop biting their nails...

There once was a clever young lass

Who slept with her thumb up her ass.

When asked why she did it,

She said "To inhibit

Thumb-sucking, until the phase passed."

Meanwhile, on the side of the highway...

This was written for a friend on her 21st birthday, but was not presented to her as she most likely would have found it disturbing (particularly, after several margaritas).

Tomorrow as morning comes round

You'll find you're asleep on the ground.

With one fuzzy glance,

You'll note lack of pants,

And how piles of bodies abound.

(Submission) A mariner hailing from Kish / Encountered a woman, half-fish / Ichthyologically-speaking / He always was sneaking / A few extra bites of that dish.

Thank you ieatedthepurpleone for this tasty bit of verse.

You somehow manage to squeeze absolutely bizarre, yet wonderful, words into poems.

Have fun storming the castle!

Higgledy Piggledy

Evil Prince Humperdink

Foolishly fired the

Miracle Max.

Harboring ire so

Unquantifiable

Max aided Westly, to

Get the prince back.