Bitter, Angsty, Tired, Confused

bitter, angsty, tired, confused

ive just been walking around the neighbourhood for hours and hours and hours

if im not constantly moving with music playing it all falls apart

logically, my mental illness is cured! but unfortunately mental illness is illogical.

i love & am so sorry to our earth for humanity

thankfully i live in a walkable area full of untouched nature, the few perks of living in an area with a neglectful council.

and maybe one day i can learn to love again

Anti-Olympics mural seen in London during the 2012 Olympics

das my bitch! (thanks for ruining the quality tumblr lol)

ill never forgive the people online who made me think EDs were cool and normal as a 12 year old because now im in my 20s with ARFID and my body is too weak to feed itself when i long so badly to live and exist in this world. i hate food but love the taste, no matter how sick and dying i look people still compliment my weight and at this point a sick part inside of me enjoys it because it's the only joy i get out of ruining my body like this. if any kid sees this i promise you it'll never be worth it, you are adding a chapter of self regret and body/mental trauma it'll take a long ass time to get past.

help ive never slept so much in my entire life ive just been hibernating like crazy and it's making me so sad im having so many nightmares and being alone in my house is driving me insane. i have been too anxious to call my doctor for over 6 months now, i just keep rotting and rotting and dreaming of close calls with death.