Im Trying To Expand This Project And Add All Kinds Of New Features. If You Want To Help, You Can Pledge

I’m trying to expand this project and add all kinds of new features. If you want to help, you can pledge 1$ to my patreon here, and in exchange, you’ll get access to a second project where I try to create the coziest/warmest art collection on the internet.

☾˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ❀ September 24. 2024 "There it is again, that funny feeling."

Done ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ ꕥ

♥︎ Math review

♥︎ Math answer

Likely one of the rare instances where I've actually completed everything on my list for the day. I've been feeling like shit lately and I can't tell whether it's because I'm slacking or if I'm burning out so much that I get mad at myself for not working 24/7. I heard that's a thing that can happen, but I'm not sure, it might be the lack of sleep too. My mind's just been all over the place lately and I'm not sure why. It's harder to focus. I think I have to really ban myself from doomscrolling on Youtube and Pinterest so much, so I'm conditioning myself to use my phone since I don't have anything too distracting on there.

On the other hand, I really have been making progress. Have I mentioned it already? I forgot, but I talked about how 5 p.m felt like a death sentence when I haven't done anything all day on here before. That's because the hours proceeding it are the busiest for things like eating, showering, washing the dishes, etc.

In order to "fix" this, I just moved all those tasks a few hours earlier than I usually do them. I used to shower around 8-10 p.m, but I changed it recently to 6-7 p.m. I don't have any control on when I can eat, so I just eat as soon as the food is ready.

Aside from that, I've been switching tactics when it comes to studying for Math. I used to copy every little detail from the textbook onto my notebook, but now I just take the photo copies of the textbook's practice questions and make flashcards of them in Canva, then I just figure it out along the way. Math is easier to learn when you put application instead of theory first.

I'm still figuring this "time management" thing out, but I think I'm doing better cutting down dead weight than before. I just need to keep going.

𖤓 Morning entry

These are the fundraisers that have contacted me recently:

@fahedshehab051 / Help Sahar and Her Family to Evacuate Gaza/ fundraiser / €54,625 raised of €85,000 goal

@dina179 / Help Dina and her children survive through the war/ fundraiser / $12,570 CAD raised of $50,000 goal

@springbutterfly37 / Gaza Humanitarian Help For my Family/ fundraiser / $2,028 USD raised of $45,000 goal

@ahmednser / Your donation rebuilds our life, which has become non-existent / fundraiser / €167 raised of €100,000 goal

@mayadayyad81 / Help little children of Gaza stay safe and alive! / fundraiser / $39,580 USD raised of $50,000 goal

@familyetaf1234567 / Please help us get out of life's crises and the woes of war. / fundraiser / €2,023 raised of €50,000 goal

Hate diet culture so much bitches will b like “don’t eat processed carbs they’re so bad for you” like and??? So what?? God did not give us grain and stone to grind it with for no reason. Bread is inevitable. Bread is food for the heart and the soul. U think I’m gonna give that up in pursuit of instagram fitness?? U think I’m gonna deny myself the simple pleasure of toast with jam so I can endlessly chase an ever-shifting standard of beauty that ultimately means nothing? In 20 years I will no longer be beautiful and in 60 my body will be vacant food for other, smaller creatures. But the taste of fresh bread? Of homemade donuts and still-warm pie? I will carry the taste on my tongue into whatever follows this life. So like. Stop telling me I should diet lmao. I’m not abt to martyr myself just to get a man to look at me.

At the same time it's fascinating to think about. I remember being 6, staring at the corner of a table and gaining awareness of my growing conscience. My back burned everytime I did something wrong and that's when I realized that I was starting to understand the concept of remorse and consequence. It was a small moment of "Huh, things are changing."

Now it's the same thing but with the increasing awareness that I am so far from being a developed, fleshed out human being, that there's so much more ahead of me and whatever I thought was the entire world when I was 12 I now know was a small, narrow portion of it.

It's inevitable. There is a world beyond me that I don't know about. I am so small. We are so small. I'm trying to learn everyday, but I no longer want to pressure myself to understand everything at once the same way I did when I was 14. The fact is that I'm immature and ignorant and I won't be ashamed of it anymore in the way that I won't be ashamed to learn.

I'm so fucking tired of being a teenager but it's also so funny. So so fucking funny. "Oh god!! What if this is just like all those years ago?! I knew I've always been fucked up, I'll never change!" And then 'all those years ago' is when you were 12-14. Bitch you'll be fine

Fml