13. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Velvet Goldmine (1998)

13. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Velvet Goldmine (1998)

Happy Pride Month!❤️🌈❤️We've made it to 1998 and can take a breather because Ewan only made two movies this year. How appropriate that on the first week of Pride Month the first review is the LGBTQ film "Velvet Goldmine"! I swear I didn't plan this. Maxwell Demon must have arranged it in the stars 😏. Also, I came across three different runtimes for this movie. The version I watched had a runtime of 1 hour and 58 minutes so the Screentime Percentage is based off of that.

Fun Fact: Toni Collette co-stars in this movie. She was in "Emma" with Ewan!

Genre: Musical/Drama

Rating: R

Director: Todd Haynes

Starring: Christian Bale, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Ewan McGregor, Toni Collette

Synopsis: If you're someone who doesn't like musicals because of the "unrealistic" factor then you'll be happy to know that's not the case here. The movie is a musical because the characters are singers/musicians and they perform throughout the movie. The film is about British glam rocker Brian Slade who fakes his own death and disappears from the public in the 70s. Ten years later, Arthur Stuart, a journalist, is given the task to unearth what really happened to the rockstar and where he is now. His search brings him in contact with former stars who knew Slade and causes him to reflect on his own tumultuous past.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character Curt Wild. Curt Wild is a gay American man who's the lead singer and guitarist of his band The Rats. Brian Slade is greatly inspired by Curt and convinces him to collaborate on some projects. Eventually, what starts as a professional relationship blossoms into something more. Ewan speaks with an American English accent for this role which sounds a little funny at times. He has long blond hair for some of the movie which I like. He has two male love interests and a kiss scene. There's also one sex scene and one implied sex scene. He pretty much never wears a shirt and in one scene even strips nude while performing! And yes, that means you get to see his penis. Speaking of performing, he sings thrice and two of those times are full performances. Fun fact: he sang all of his vocals live instead of lip syncing to a pre-recorded track while filming! As far as acting, I think he did well with the limited amount of screentime he had.

Screentime Percentage (numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 20/118 minutes making his SP 17%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is the movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes, even though he doesn't have much screen time, he makes the most of it. Is the movie worth watching in general? Yes, it's a great LGBTQ movie! Plus, the soundtrack is infectious.

Where to Watch: "Velvet Goldmine" is available for rent on YouTube, Google Play Movies and TV, Fandango at Home, and Amazon Prime Video. It's also currently uploaded for free on YouTube through the account SELVA BEATS. Just search "Velvet Goldmine 1998 filme raro leg". Heads up: the movie has Portuguese subtitles that can't be turned off. Lastly, you can pirate the movie on soap2day.

Closing Thoughts: This movie makes me go Wild (pun-intended😉) with each watch. The music, costumes, performances, acting, EVERYTHING makes my heart pound. When I watched it for the first time I said the same thing Arthur did in the movie, "That's me! That's me!" It's been 26 years since it was released and in 2024 I was able to say, "That's me." I felt hope. I felt less alone. And I know I'm not the only one who saw themselves and felt the same. "Velvet Goldmine" is a beautiful movie in every way and well worth a watch.

7. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: The Pillow Book (1996)

Genre: Erotic/Romance

Rating: Un-Rated

Director: Peter Greenaway

Starring: Vivian Wu, Yoshi Oida, Ewan McGregor

Synopsis: "The Pillow Book" is an erotic film about a woman, Nagiko, who has a fetish for men writing on her body. What started as an innocent tradition of her father writing on her for her birthday, evolved into an obsession with finding the perfect calligrapher / lover. Nagiko also aspires to be a writer like her namesake, Sei Shonagon, the author of The Pillow Book. After she is rejected by a book publisher who sexually assaulted her father she instead decides to walk the path of revenge.

Ewan Review: Ewan McGregor plays the character Jerome, a bisexual English translator. He is chosen by Nagiko to help with her revenge unbeknownst to him. He is completely nude several times in the film, has a female and male love interest, and sex scenes with both of them. He has an English accent for the movie and has a couple lines in French and Japanese. Another fun fact: you might notice that he's pretty slender in this role and that's because he was in the process of losing weight for his role in "Trainspotting".

Screentime Percentage: Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 28/127 minutes making his SP 22%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is this movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes! Did I mention the nudity? Is it worth watching in general? I say yes. I know this movie won't be for everyone. It's a weird story, highly erotic, and has slow pacing. Still, I enjoy it and wouldn't dissuade someone from watching.

Where to Watch: "The Pillow Book" is currently available to rent through YouTube.

Movie Warnings: There are some things that happen in the movie that you might want to be aware of before committing to watching it. Nudity nudity and more nudity! Women and men are naked and yes that includes seeing their genitals. There are a LOT of penises in this movie. There's blackmail via sexual assault as well as a suicide scene, skin cutting, blood, and defiling of a dead body.

Conclusion: The Pillow Book" is a beautiful work of art. Though it is a weird story, it's also interesting and captures your attention. Though it's highly erotic, the eroticism adds value to the story and isn't there just for shock. And while the pacing may be slow, it allows the viewer to absorb information and appreciate the visual storytelling. I encourage you to open your mind and give it a chance. Like Nagiko, you just might learn something new about yourself.

4. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Nothing but the Truth (1995)

TRIGGER WARNING: In this review, I mention sexual violence because that is what this movie is about. I don't go into great detail. Still, if the topic of sexual violence/assault is triggering for you then this is your warning to scroll past.

Ewan McGregor's first project of 1995 was the pilot episode of British television series Kavanagh Q.C. titled "Nothing but the Truth." You might be asking yourself, "television series? I thought those were going to be excluded?" You're right and the reason I included this episode in our movie review list is because it has a runtime of an HOUR AND FORTY-ONE MINUTES. Where I come from, we call that a movie. The episode is also a standalone project, meaning that you don't need to watch the whole series or even an additional episode to finish the plot or understand the narrative. Everything you need to know for the episode happens in the episode.

A couple fun facts before we get started!

In this project, Ewan works alongside Geraldine James again. You might remember her from our previous review as the ex-jazz singer in "Doggin' Around." I thought that was cool! Here, she plays Eleanor Harker Q.C. (Queen's Counsel) who is the prosecutor attorney.

If you've ever heard Ewan say that he met his wife while working on a project, THIS is that project! This is where he met his first wife, Eve Mavrakis, who is credited as the Assistant Art Director. The episode aired January 3, 1995 and six months later they were wed.

Let's dive in!

Movie Review: "Nothing but the Truth" stars the late John Thaw as the titular Kavanagh Q.C. James Kavanagh is a senior barrister and arguably the best. While he couldn't be more adept at his job as a barrister, the same cannot be said for his job as a husband and father. The demands of these roles pull him in different directions and cause friction between him and his wife. The main plot is about an affluent young man accused of sexually assaulting the woman for whom he works. Naturally, it's a he said/she said situation. He claims that it was a consensual fling while she claims the opposite. The evidence corroborates both of their stories to an extent which makes it even harder to know who is being honest. As one of the best lawyers in Britain, Kavanagh is tasked with defending the accused. Unfortunately, defending a man accused of rape only creates more cracks in the foundation of his familial relationships. Armed with his intellect and belief in the inherent goodness of man, Kavanagh is determined to find nothing but the truth.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character David Armstrong who is our young man accused of sexual assault. He has a posh English accent and is incredibly soft-spoken. He also has a stutter which sounds a bit forced at times. This role is my absolute favorite for his long, silky, hair era! We get a few shots of it in the half-up/half-down style but for the majority of the film it's all down. They must have given him a full on blow out because that hair was thick, long, and luscious! His hair needed it's own acting credit. Ewan also showcases his acting skills really well in this role. I've felt for a long time that Ewan performs best in roles that require subtlety and he does a great job in this one. On a more critical note, even though he often plays characters who are depicted in a negative light, those stories tend to require you to suspend your disbelief. That is not the case with this movie. This is a serious topic and the movie handles it with the seriousness it deserves. If Ewan brings you comfort and you only engage with his more wholesome roles, then this might not be for you. There are no graphic depictions of sex in the movie but there is sexual audio twice and in the court scenes the characters go into detail about the incident.

Screentime Percentage (All numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 21/101 minutes making his SP 21%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is this movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes, even with the low percentage! Again, his hair is *chef's kiss* 🤌. We get to see him sweaty and working in the dirt as well as dressed up in a three piece suit. There's also a brief makeout scene and shirtless scene. Is the movie worth watching in general? This is very difficult for me to say but my answer is no. My opinion is that the movie is /only/ worth watching for Ewan. If he wasn't in it or was in it even less then it'd be a skip for me. The premise is interesting but the movie can be slow in places. Also, maybe it's just because this was the pilot episode or the legal system being different in Britain, but there were significant issues not addressed in the court scenes that make the ending a little less satisfying. If you like crime shows, then you might like this regardless of the Ewan factor. But be warned, this is not a flashy, fast-paced drama like Law and Order SVU or Criminal Minds. It's an old, British, drama about an old lawyer.

Where to Watch: "Nothing but the Truth" is currently uploaded for free on YouTube through the channel "Ewan McGregor Vault". Just search "Kavanagh Q.C. Nothing But the Truth with Ewan McGregor". If you want to watch the full series, all episodes are also uploaded for free on a YouTube playlist through the channel "o p i u m 1". Just search "Kavanagh Qc".

Conclusion: "Nothing but the Truth" is a hidden gem in Ewan McGregor's career. Unlike other crime shows I've seen, this movie was unique in that there wasn't very much information the audience had that the characters didn't. You really have to pay attention, trust your gut, and hope the verdict is the right one. This also makes the movie great for rewatches because you'll start to notice things in the background that add to the story. I highly suggest watching this with another person because if you're like me, you're going to have a lot to talk about as the truth is revealed.

6. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Trainspotting (1996)

We've made it to another year and it's a big one! That's right, Ewan only had two projects in 1995, but that's because our boy was extremely busy in '96. He released FOUR movies that year! What's really wild is that isn't even his record number for movies released in one year. 😱

A quick fun fact before we get started: The producer of "Trainspotting", Andrew Macdonald, has a cameo in the movie as a prospective renter. He was also the producer for "Shallow Grave"!

Genre: Crime/Drama

Rating: R

Director: Danny Boyle

Starring: Ewan McGregor, Jamie Lee Miller, Ewen Bremner, Robert Carlyle, Kevin McKidd, Kelly McDonald

Movie Review: The movie "Trainspotting" reunited Danny Boyle as director, John Hodge as screenwriter, and Ewan McGregor as leading man. "It is about a group of friends/heroin addicts living day to day in Edinburgh, Scotland. Their only goal is to score their next hit of the drug by any means necessary. The story is told from the perspective of the main character, Mark Renton, who attempts and struggles at getting clean. The movie is essentially a day in the life of an addict. Like a train wreck, you can't look away, even as the characters speed towards death. It's unflinchingly honest, gritty and captivating. It was also a smash hit! Nowadays, people primarily know Ewan McGregor for his role as Obi-Wan Kenobi but may not know that his role in Trainspotting is what actually launched his career.

Ewan Review: Ewan McGregor plays the main character Mark Renton aka Renton. Renton is a junkie who loves being a junkie. For him, there is no greater pleasure than being high. Though he sometimes realizes that sobriety is the better choice, he can't help but to fall back into addiction. He's a selfish asshole (a recurring theme with Ewan characters) who is friends with selfish assholes. Renton also has a sexual relationship with a child. The movie doesn't frame this relationship negatively or explore any repercussions so do with that information as you will. Ewan gives a stellar performance and even lost around thirty pounds for the role!

Screentime Percentage (Numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a total of 52/94 minutes making his SP 55%. This is his highest score yet!

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is the movie worth watching for Ewan McGregor content alone? Yes. Is it worth watching in general? Yes. Fair warning, the movie can be dry-heave inducing. There's nudity, graphic depictions of drug use, lots of blood, two feces scenes, and decaying bodies.

Where to Watch: "Trainspotting" is currently for rent on YouTube or you can watch it for free on soap2day. You can also stream it if you have a subscription to Paramount+, MGM+, or Amazon Prime Video.

Conclusion: "Trainspotting" is a movie deserving of its accolades. The writing is phenomenal, the actors gave it their all, the soundtrack is perfect, and the opening monologue is iconic. It's my belief that everyone should watch this movie at least once.

Puppy Break

Movie: The Island (2005)

Character: Lincoln Six Echo/Reader

Synopsis: You bring Lincoln Six Echo with you to the dog pound and he has a grave misunderstanding of what the purpose of a pound is.

A/N: I absolutely adore this character and see myself in him a bit. It’s a shame that he doesn’t receive more love in fandom. This story took longer than I expected and evolved way beyond its initial idea. Still, it was super fun to write! Hope you enjoy!

Your eyes snap open from peaceful slumber. You could have sworn you heard scratching at your door like a mole trying to dig its way into your room. You contemplate investigating the sound but the bed covers lull you back to its warm embrace. Obviously a mole isn’t trying to get into your room. The sound was probably just the remnants of a dream. You settle back down to rest and begin drifting off to dreamland when-

Whineee bark bark!

Okay, you definitely aren’t dreaming and that definitely isn’t a mole. You begrudgingly exit your bed to see the critter that found its way into your home. As you make your way to the door, you hear your housemate and friend, Lincoln Six Echo, urgently shushing, "Please be quiet, little one! My friend does not like being woken up so early."

You open the door and ask, “Lincoln, what on earth is going on out here?” You catch Lincoln crouched with his back towards you halfway from your door trying to make a sneaky exit.

“Uh-oh, too late” Lincoln says sheepishly. He slowly turns around and smiles proudly while holding out a small puppy cradled in his hands. “I have a new friend!” The puppy barked as if to confirm what Lincoln said as true.

“Uh, where did you find a puppy, Lincoln?” You question. You love puppies but at this moment you’re worried that it might belong to someone missing their furry friend.

“He found me! I went outside to take out the trash and he was sitting in front of the door. He kept following me and wanted to come inside so now we are friends!” The puppy interrupted Lincoln with a whine and squirmed wildly to get out of his grasp. Upon setting the pup down he immediately went to squat and your eyes widened in horror as you realized why he was so fussy.

“NONONO!” You cried out and picked up the pup mid poop to run outside where he continued his “business”. You rubbed your temple in exasperation. You loved Lincoln. You really did. But he somehow had an uncanny ability to bring chaos to your mundane life. The pup began sniffing around the yard and you cooed at him to get his attention. He bounded over to you and you scratched his tiny head. Lincoln sat next to you and you showed him how to gently pet the pup. The puppy seemed to enjoy all the attention and rolled over on his back with his tail wagging energetically. You then noticed that “he” is actually a “she.”

“Looks like your new friend is a girl.” you chuckle.

“Really? how do you know?” Lincoln asked with a puzzled expression.

“Well, uhh, you know- look, I’ll explain later just trust me on this.”

“Oh, Okay! So, can we keep her?”

You scratch under the puppy’s chin. She has a stubby tail and is white with a brown spot on her back, a white muzzle, and brown face and ears with a white stripe between her eyes. You recognize her breed as a Jack Russell Terrier.

“First, we have to see if she belongs to anybody. Someone might be looking for her. You don’t want to steal someone’s friend, right?

"You turned and looked at him.

“No, I don’t want to do that” he said slowly. “But, if no one is looking for her, then can we keep her?” he looked at you optimistically.

You didn’t want to ruin his enthusiasm. Sure, puppies are cute and fun to play with but they are also a huge responsibility. However, it was difficult to tell him no considering the hardships he has faced. Plus, your heart was warmed seeing Lincoln be showered with puppy kisses. Maybe it would be helpful for him to learn how to take of something else. But is a puppy the right thing for such a task? You were already taking care of Lincoln and helping him get acclimated to life outside the Institute. Adding a puppy to the mix might be too much mental strain for him and financial strain for you. There was so much to contemplate and you didn’t yet know how to explain all this to Lincoln. So, you decided to let him down gently when the time was right. For now, you give him a simple “I’ll think about it.” Surely by tomorrow he will have found another new friend. You and Lincoln play with the pup outside for a bit and feed her some bits of leftover chicken before walking around the neighborhood asking if anyone was missing their dog. To your dismay (and Lincoln’s relief), no one had lost a Jack Russell puppy.

“Yay we can keep her we can keep her!” Lincoln chanted triumphantly.

“Hold on Lincoln, I said I’d think about it. Besides, there’s one more place we need to go. If there’s any information on this pup, then it’ll be at the dog pound.”

“What’s a dog pound?” Lincoln queried.

“It’s where lost dogs go so their owners can find them.”

“Huh, ok.” You could see Lincoln mulling over what you just told him. You expected him to ask another question until it seemed he decided against it with a quick shake of his head. You both got into your car with the puppy sitting in Lincoln’s lap and drove to the local pound. When you got there, the two of you went inside and walked to the front desk to talk to the receptionist.

“Good morning, how may I help you?” the receptionist greeted you both with a warm smile. She was wearing scrubs with puppies and kittens on them which seemed to put Lincoln a bit at ease.

“Hello” you began, “my friend here found this puppy in our yard earlier today. We’ve asked our neighbors if she belongs to them but we’ve had no luck so far. I was wondering if anyone has called or come up here looking for a lost puppy?”

“I’m sorry, I haven’t received any calls or heard anything about a lost puppy thus far. But, if you’d like, I can take her to the back and see if she’s been chipped. If she has then we can pull up her owner’s information and contact them right away.”

The receptionist finished explaining and held her hands out to Lincoln to take the pup. Lincoln protectively wrapped his arms tighter around the puppy and looked at you with worry in his eyes.

“Can’t I go with her? What if she gets scared?” he asked.

“It’s okay, Lincoln.” you reassure him. “You need to let the nice lady do her job so she can help us. She won’t be gone long.” this time, you hold your hands out. Lincoln sighed and relinquished the pup into your hands then you turned and passed her to the patient receptionist.

“Don’t worry, sir. I’ll take good care of her and be back before you know it.” She flashed another smile then walked through the door behind her desk.

You patted Lincoln’s shoulder and gave him a soft smile. “How about we take a look at the other dogs here while we wait?” you hoped that this would provide a nice distraction for Lincoln.

“There are other dogs here?” Lincoln looked at you quizzically.

“Yeah, remember, I told you that this is where lost dogs go. According to that sign up ahead they’re just down the hallway.” You motion to Lincoln to follow you and begin walking down the hallway. The sound of dogs barking grew louder and you soon see the first of several metal gates that line the corridor on both sides. You walk up to an elderly golden retriever who lazily wags its tail and ambles toward the gate. You kneel down to let it sniff your hand. You were so focused on the dog that you didn’t notice Lincoln frozen in place with a look of fear plastered on his face.

“Why are they locked up? Who did this to them?” Lincoln’s voice is soft and quivering. Looking at these sweet animals, he was reminded of his life at the Institute and being locked away from the world. Even the metal bars preventing the clamoring dogs from being pet reminded him of the ever watchful guards telling him to “watch his proximity.”

You look up at him with confusion written on your face. “They’re not locked up, Link. This is just for their and our safety. Trust me, the staff take very good care of them. You stand up to walk toward Lincoln and he takes a step back. “Lincoln, what’s wrong? What are you thinking about?” You were concerned for your friend. He doesn’t talk much about his life at the Institute but sometimes when he has a nightmare or a panic attack over something that seems normal to you, he opens up a bit. You feel that this is one of those moments that he is being reminded of his past life. You just hope that he will confide in you so that you can put his fears to rest. Before he can answer, the receptionist peeks her head down the hall and calls to you both. You make a mental note to continue this conversation later and head back down the hall into the main entrance. You cross your fingers that the puppy has a home somewhere.

“So I scanned this sweet girl and it doesn’t look like she’s registered to a home. Sounds to me like she was meant to be with you.” She looked at Lincoln and gave him a playful wink. She continued, “Would you like to be her forever home or would you rather leave her with us?”

“Yes, we’ll take her!” Lincoln thrust his arms out to take the puppy back when you step in front of him.

“Actually, could you give us a minute to think it over, please?” you ask.

The lady nods and says, “I’ll give you two some privacy. I’ll be back here whenever you’re ready.” and walked back through the door.

“Hey! you said-” Lincoln starts but you interrupt him.

“I said I’ll THINK about it, Lincoln. That doesn’t mean yes!” Lincoln lowers his head and you mentally kick yourself for your words coming out hasher than you wanted but you know it’s time to rip off the band-aid.

“Listen, Lincoln” you say with a softer tone, “I know you want this puppy very badly, but you don’t understand how big of a responsibility they are. If you want a pet, I’ll get you one, but we need to start smaller than a dog.” you tenderly place your hand on his shoulder and hope he understands where you’re coming from. Instead, he catches you off guard with a question.

“What does chipped mean?” Lincoln slowly meets your eyes. “The lady said that if puppy was chipped then they can contact her owner. What is a chip?”

You’re a bit surprised at his question and why he’s thinking about that right now but answer slowly, “a chip is a very tiny tracker that is inserted under the skin of an animal. It contains their information like where they live and who to call if they’re lost. It’s for their safety.”

“Just like my tracker was for my safety?” Lincoln looked at you with a new resolve and wrapped his fingers around his wrist mimicking a bracelet. The one he and all the other clones were forced to wear so that their movements would always be under surveillance. The one that ensured no one ever escaped. The one that you removed when, just like this lost puppy, he wound up on your doorstep searching for a friend. Just as it dawns on you why he was so tense earlier and the significance of what you just explained to him, Lincoln exclaimed, “This is just the Institute all over again! We can’t leave her here! We have to help them before it’s too late!” and with that Lincoln burst through the receptionist’s door, ran to her, and snatched the puppy out of her hands. The poor woman could do nothing but shriek in surprise. Lincoln turned toward the entrance door to escape but something caught his eye: a big red lever on the wall beside the receptionist’s door that read “Pull for Emergency.” Unfortunately for everyone, Lincoln could’t read, but he was hoping that this big red lever hidden behind the door was just what he needed to free his doggy friends. With one hand he cradled the puppy and with the other he pulled the lever.

You were taken aback by how quickly Lincoln moved to rescue his puppy friend. “Lincoln, STOP! What are you doing?” you shouted! But it was like he couldn’t hear you. As he ran back toward you, you saw him briefly hesitate while staring at the wall in front of him and then pull something. Immediately, alarms started blaring, lights flashing and the overhead sprinklers drenching you in water. Pandemonium ensued with the all dogs barking, jumping, and howling. The cold water seemed to snap the receptionist to her senses and she yelled “GET OUT OF MY BUILDING NOOOWWW!”

You and Lincoln bolt out of the building and jump into your car. You were so shocked at this turn of events that you couldn’t even say anything until the puppy stood up on Lincoln’s lap and shook water everywhere. You slammed the brakes and yelled, “What on earth was that?! Are you crazy?!”

“I was j-just trying to f-f-free them!” He stuttered. The cold water soaking both of your clothes was taking its toll.

You took a deep breath to calm down and tried to see things from his perspective. “Lincoln, they don’t need to be freed. I know you see similarities between them and you but this is different. I would never bring this puppy or any animal to a place that is going to harm them. Besides, even if you were successful, now there would be hundreds of dogs running loose with nowhere to go, no food or water and most importantly, no way for their families to find them.”

“I g-g-guess I didn’t think about that...I’m s-sorry.” he apologized through chattering teeth.

You drove the rest of the way home in silence. When you parked the car in the driveway you paused before getting out and let out a chuckle, “I can’t believe you pulled the fire alarm trying to break those dogs out.”

Lincoln timidly chuckled as well and within seconds you were both laughing uproariously till tears came out of your eyes. Or was that just water dripping from your hair onto your face? Either way, you wiped your face and turned to exit the car when Lincoln meekly asked, “So, have you thought about it?” You turned to look at him and were met by four pairs of puppy dog eyes. You sighed.

How could you say no?

I'm getting a hoop earring like his today in honor of the man, the myth, the legend, my favorite actor, Ewan McGregor! 🥳💞💞🥳💞💞🥳

HAPPY EWAN MCGREGOR’S BIRTHDAY TO ALL THOSE WHO CELEBRATE