After About 16 Months Of Constant Pain, I Finally Got A Diagnosis. Turns Out, I Have Long COVID. The

After about 16 months of constant pain, I finally got a diagnosis. Turns out, I have long COVID. The nurse said the symptoms overlap with fibro, so I've been put on an anti-inflammitory.

I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't this. Experimental drug trials are the only other medical options I have.

Time to start wearing a mask again.

my doctors: he’s disabled

my nurses: he’s disabled

my case worker: he’s disabled

division of vocational rehab: he’s disabled

therapist: he’s disabled

surgeons consulting on my case: he’s disabled

physical therapist: he’s disabled

the medical receptionist I’m on first name basis with: he’s disabled

government: I DUNNO …. is he reeaaally disabled though? how can we be sure???

disabled people are worth whatever cost or resources is needed to keep them alive. disabled people are worth it even if they don't live long. they're worth it even if they will need extra support and resources for every day of their life. they're worth it even if they spend all they life indoors. none of it is wasted. none of it is in vain. time, effort, money, resources spent on a life are not wasted. these things have served their purpose. the joy of someone's existence is not undermined by not lasting forever. there's no meaningful point, some threshold where you can say "okay this is enough. after that it's not worth it." it's always worth it.

"the cost of convenience does not have to be human lives. we are literally conditioned to think that in order for us to have certain things someone has to suffer and that is the farthest thing from the truth."

btw something im working on learning is that disabled is something that im allowed to be in public.

im allowed to lay down on the living room floor if im in middle of a conversation & enjoying it but feeling too lightheaded to sit up. im allowed to sit at the table to do meal prep and to sit on a stool at the stove to cook. im allowed to use my cane while i run errands.

if people are uncomfortable with my disabled existence, it’s their responsibility to work on that, it’s not my responsibility to try to hide my disability from the view of abled people.

i shouldn’t be relegated to my bedroom or to my house or to places where no one else will be just to have accommodations. im allowed to just exist & not have to pretend to be able bodied for the comfort & convenience of others.