Merlin: God, Why Did I Say That?! I Should Cut Out My Tongue.

Merlin: God, why did I say that?! I should cut out my tongue.

Merlin: Are you going to sack me?

Arthur: No. Though that offer concerning your tongue is very tempting...

Visiting noble: Your Majesty, your servant is very well behaved. He didn't utter a single word all evening.

Arthur: Yes, thank you. It's because he was raised by tibetan monks.

Merlin: *shooting daggers at Arthur with his eyes*

*earlier that day*

Arthur: I warn you, Merlin. If you breathe so much as a single word at the feast tonight, you will take turns spending every night until next winter in either the stocks or the dungeons. Don't embarrass me.

Arthur: On second thought, magic your mouth shut for the remainder of the evening. Just to be sure.

Arthur: I will not pay for this, Merlin.

Merlin: Oh, so you're disobeying the law now? That's a turn on.

Arthur: No. I won't pay it because you will.

Merlin: That's a turn off.

Arthur: I will deduct it from your salary.

Merlin: My salary? So you're not sacking me?

Arthur: No. But you're grounded.

Merlin: Grounded? Can't you bend me over your knee and spank me like any normal adult would?

Merlin: Oh, look. Now there's a turn on again.

Thanks for your recs! I read them all and they are incredibly cute 😍

Do you have any recommendations for "wrong number" fics? Thanks! :c)

Here you go:

Wrong Number

Misdialed

Wrong Number

Damsel in a Phone Booth

A Different Kind of Dating Service

Prompt #5:

Soulmate AU:

You know how they say you get hiccups when your soulmate thinks about you but kisses someone else?

Well, let’s just say Arthur does not suffer a shortage of partners, and Merlin is seriously fed up with his seemingly neverending hiccup.

Prompt #5:

Soulmate AU:

You know how they say you get hiccups when your soulmate thinks about you but kisses someone else?

Well, let’s just say Arthur does not suffer a shortage of partners, and Merlin is seriously fed up with his seemingly neverending hiccup.