I Was Really Pushing Myself For A Couple Weeks Doing Like Everything All Day And Definitely Felt It But

I was really pushing myself for a couple weeks doing like everything all day and definitely felt it but I’ve reached a point that I can’t really do more than 1 or 2 big things a day now because I’ve pushed myself into a flare that if I want to shower that’s my activity for the day (yeah a shower is a big thing and I hate that that’s the case)

The mind numbing anger of chronic fatigue is getting irritable because you're so fucking tired but you really feel like you SHOULDNT BE.

You SHOULD be able to sit at a desk and do work. You SHOULD be able to just watch a freaking YouTube video. You SHOULD be able to just eat fucking lunch.

But you can't. Because your eyes are closing and it's like temporary death is taking you.

Why do people think it's tragic when you use mobility aids? Can't you see that this is giving me freedom, that it's giving me my life back, that without it, I wouldn't be present? Let alone functional???

how can't you see this

it's giving me my life back.

Even when it's short term mobility aids like crutches for a broken bone, it's still giving freedom... it's allowing the bone to heal and for you to live as usual...

let alone people with chronic pain, paralysis, and long term injuries!

without them, I wouldn't be here!

how can't you see that is a good thing!?!? 😭😭

You may wonder, why do some disabled people not shower often? Well, you see, showers are actually quite intense trials designed to kill us. The steam? Makes the blood in our bodies go wild, fucks up our balance and tries to make us pass out. You have to be standing or sitting. Standing is hell and sitting is a peculiar purgatory. Reaching for bottles and soap and shit requires moving The Body, which is in constant pain that will only get worse the more we move and so will the fog that envelopes our brains and impairs our thinking.

Don't even get me started on drying off. "Why don't some of you shower often" I don't know, why don't you run marathons regularly? Because it sucks and you can't, that's why.

Why are abled people so OBSESSED with telling us to go out and exercise!!! I have been in a flare-up for 2 weeks, I can barely move, I am dizzy as fuck, standing is fucking excruciating, GOING FOR A MOTHER FUCKING WALK WILL NOT FIX THAT!!!

POTS really just is like microdosing death sometimes, feels like someone clicked restart