bipanicera - Pau (The Til Dawn Edition)
Pau (The Til Dawn Edition)

I explain stuff about:I’m currently talking with a boy who might be my future boyfriend and making a new friend in class. Btw I’m Swiftie 🩵

44 posts

Bipanicera - Pau (The Til Dawn Edition) - Tumblr Blog

8 months ago

30th day talking to the new guy on the class: Guys, I’m so sorry that I’ve kinda forgotten this section, but it’s just been really good with him. He’s really king and I do feel really comfortable with him, I really want to be his friend.

We’ve talked almost every day and if we continue like this for more month more o less, I think that he’ll consider me as a friend.

I’m so happy that finally I’ve been able to make a new friend (because all the others weren’t my friends, actually; and I don’t really like them) so I do love the fact that I’ve had the opportunity of meeting a new person, and be able to be with a friend who I care and like.


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8 months ago

-I’m a heterosexual guy who likes guys too.

-So… you’re bi, actually, aren’t you?

-I wouldn’t call it like that…

I’m fighting with this shit again… If I could just be straight and have a girlfriend… I’d be so happy 😔 But anyway, I’m gay (sorry, bi, actually)


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8 months ago

Today I’ve upload the first Instagram note dedicated to the guy who I’ve been talking with for one month and might be my boyfriend! Idk if it’s a pretty good choice, but it’s New Year’s Day song, by Taylor Swift. (I didn’t know which song could be better, if 22, labyrinth, hits different or this one)


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8 months ago

Oh no, I’m falling in love again… I thought the plane was going down… how did I turn it right around? 💙😮‍💨


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8 months ago

Update 47th day: Okay, during last week, we talked every day. Some days short conversations, but at least we talked every day.

On 9th October, we met up and it was just amazing. I do like him, but I can’t see the line between friendship and relationship! I’m just scared… I fear about doing it bad or lose him and idk what to do tbh.

I’m just wonderstruck, thinking about what he thinks about me or if he likes me. Anyway, I’m trying to relax and just enjoy the fall-in-love moment…


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8 months ago

Hits different… hits different because it’s you 💙


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9 months ago

Hiii! Sorry guys that I’ve just disappeared from Tumblr, but I just didn’t have time.

Well, yesterday we walked a little around the city and chatted and it was just amazing, I mean I can’t believe that I’m kinda dating a guy.

He’s sooo nice, I’m just wondering what he thinks about me, cuz what if he doesn’t like me back? This was the second “date” so I think that he does like me cuz if he doesn’t, why would he accept a second “date”?


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9 months ago

Update 36th day: Okay, today we’ve finally met up. He came here, so I kinda feel bad that he was the one who had to travel to come to see me, but anyway at least we could see to each other.

We had so much fun!! It rained so it was really romantic to share the umbrella and walking in the rain…

We went to the harbor and then to the city center and he ate a Pain au chocolat and I had a cup of coffee, and the café was really nice and I did love chatting with him there, because we were there like for 40 minutes or something like that.

I did enjoy the afternoon, and I hope that did too and that we’ll meet up again soon.

Omg after 36 days talking to each other by Instagram, it’s just incredible that we’ve seen each others. He’s such a good boy!


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9 months ago

Update day 36th: Omg guys today I’m meeting up with him 😭😭 I’m so nervous!!! After one month (more or less) we’re going to see each other, so wish me luck!!

Btw please give me recommendations!!


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9 months ago

Update 35th day: Yesterday we chatted a little but not too much. In theory, tomorrow we’re gonna meet up for the first time, so I’m kinda nervous and excited!! Btm we haven’t set a specific time in the day, but it’s tomorrow.

(Btw today they’re making the pictures of all years in my high school, and I don’t really like my outfit, so let’s see how I look on the pictures…)

9 months ago

Update 31st day (I think): Okay, during this week, we’ve talked some days about random and worthless stuff, but it doesn’t matter, at least we’ve talked to each other.

Anyway, the important thing is that today he’s typed and and he’s asked me to meet up soon (next week). I can’t even explain how I feel, cuz I’m going to see him for the first time and I need him to like me. I’m so nervous!!!

Omg I can’t believe this!

But idk what I want, and idk if I’d be comfortable with him, like, this is a really great opportunity, like, he might be my first boyfriend! And I’m not sure about that, like, I need to solve some stuff about being bi and you know, that kinda stuff.

But I can’t believe this 😭😭


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9 months ago

Hi, guys!! Sorry for not posting anything this week, but there is the update!

During this week, I’ve talked more with the new guy on the class, and today we’ve been taking during the whole playground time, without awkward silences (which is quite good, because we used to have so many awkward silences before).

I do like this boy, and I think that being his friend might help me to feel better with myself and he’s new in the school, so he does need new friends.

I’m really enjoying this process, and I like that fact of making new friends! It’s really exciting!


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9 months ago

Day 4 talking to the new guy in the class: Today, haven’t talked too much, I’d say two or three minutes, no more than that.

Cuz some girls arrived and they kinda stole him, so I didn’t know anything about him, though he was sitting next to me, just with one girl in the middle of us.

Idk, I hope that on Monday we’ll have a better conversation and we’ll be talking to each other, cuz I’d say that I’ve been trying to be his friend for more that a week!


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9 months ago

Today’s update is probably the most interesting update that I’ve ever typed.

Day 3 talking to the new guy in the class: Okay, today when I saw him I went with him and we had a little talk but he was as kind as usual, and today he’s been less shy and I liked that.

However, some of my friends came and then we had like 15 people with us, and one girl told him that she’s in love with him and he was really embarrassed cuz he’s shy. Then he told her that he wouldn’t hang out with her, so she left.

Then arrived like 25 people around us and it was kinda uncomfortable cuz I know them but he doesn’t and he’s quite shy.

Anyway, when the playground time ended, we went to class and I told him not to mind about that girl and well tbh idk why it’s happened this.

At least I think that every day we’re being more friends and I do hope that he wants to be my friend cuz he’s very very kind and I want to be his friend too.


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9 months ago

Day 4 talking to the new guy ok the class! Let’s see how it goes…

9 months ago

Day 3 talking to the new guy in the class: Today I haven’t talked too much with him, cuz he’s meeting new people so we went away. So today I just talked to him like 5 minutes.

He’s still shy, but he’s really nice! I want him to be my friend.

9 months ago

Day 1 talking to the new guy of the class: On Friday 13th I decided to approach and talk to a new guy in my year, he’s not in my class, he’s in the other class but he’s in the same year. We were a little awkward but He was a really calmed and nice guy.

Day 2 talking to the new guy of the class: Today, Monday 16th I’ve wanted to talk to him again. He didn’t remember my name so he asked me for it and then we had a kinda awkward conversation cuz there were some awkward silences, however, I did like to be with him cuz I like his personality. He doesn’t like sport like me, so perfect!

I do want to be his friend, but idk if he wants to too, I’d like to know what he thinks about me, but by the moment I’m his only friend (apart from one annoying girl who’s following me whenever I’m with him…)


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9 months ago

Update 19th day: We didn’t talk to each other that day…

Update 20th: This day he was the first person who typed to each other, which means that he kinda cares. (I guess) We talked about the weekend and then he sent me a video of him talking and showing the clothes which he had bought that day. He’s pretty nice, also kinda gay! I’ve told him that day I’m gonna send him a video about what I bought yesterday, so later I’ll send it.


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9 months ago

Excuse me, may I be 12 years old again knowing that things which I know now?

I want to be a completely different boy. I want to be an npc, I want to play a sport, have friends who are boys and just be a normal boy.

9 months ago

I’ve made the fucking. I’m tired of this. I’ve changed in my interior, I haven’t in the exterior.

I want to move on to another city, and be a completely different boy. I just want to be a normal boy, even if I were an npc, I’d be happy.


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