Tis Up To You!!! Same With If Gaster Is Or Is Not Physically Present! - Tumblr Posts
They feel as though a wire threatening to snap, and it all feels too familiar.
━ the world around them thrums with a life that threatens to suffocate them. they have suffocated it in the past. perhaps this is how they recognize the pressure it places upon them. perhaps they are only feeling what it is everyone else feels under this godforsaken mountain : the weight of miles on their shoulders. the weight of magic. thick in the air, it threatens again. empty threats, but their windpipe rattles with anticipation in motion.
pacing. movement. to never stop, a future or present of paperwork endless but as is their will, such is one of their many fatal flaws, is it not? ━ to be so determined, to be so capable. such not to disallow failure, but rather, to disallow retreat.
they will do this. they must do this. this is who they are.
their death lies waiting for them, and they, waiting for it. eventually, they will win. how it is always an eventually.
the mountain is no longer there. it has not been in a long time. ━ a falsehood their mind forgoes, the threads they've lived and will live tangling on themselves, the brain not meant to contain memories to the caliber of which they know and keep and never shed ━ they feel slightly lightheaded with their own existence; a rattle, shiver, stop. ( you're being spoken to. answer. his voice ringing like hollow bells. )
you are in the hall. the grey wallpaper reminds you of winter. you cannot remember to which house it belongs anymore. ( toriel's, asgore's, the home they are yet to live, the home they were born in / a never-ending absolution of places of your past, places of your future, and place you are in; always leaving sooner than you expect. )
" There is, but not like━ " not like this, not like you, not like us. " ━not with them. " is how they choose to conclude, hands running through hair, dark eyes closed. tense like a lightning rod waiting in the negative air for that positive strike. tense like a storm cloud, cotton ball, cheek bone. maybe its him they're waiting for. intuition like a signal they're tuning into, when the frequency is right. his world, the one they don't belong to, the one he's stuck in. or maybe not. the world shivers in double-vision. they can't tell if they see him at all.
" I don't want to put this onto them. " I can't put this onto them. " There are strength in numbers, but I'm the support beam, they're the tenants, right? I keep them up so they can live. I keep them... " they trail with an inhale, realization striking cold the back of their throat of how selfish that sounded; as though they needed them. they didn't. that's one of the hard parts.
" Sorry, " like trying to atone for a mistake and speed past it all at once, no less sincere in the effort regardless " I'm just a little stressed. Give it an hour. it's not your problem to deal with me. " ━ I'm not acting the way I should with you, the way I want you to see me, even if you've already seen too much.
@quillheel asked ; ❛ this isn’t our fight , Gaster . it’s my fight . ❜ from Frisk to Gaster !
It cannot help the solemn expression that crosses its face at those words. They are ones that have been used far too many times. He has his.. reservations about the human - he has seen what they are capable of, both at their best and worst. But there is merit in the fact that they settled for the happier ending. It must take solace in that.
And such moral conundrums are not solved by this mentality. Feeling the need that everything rests solely on ones own shoulders can lead to a worse condition. That, and perhaps they have endured enough fighting.
"And why must that be the case? Is there not strength in numbers?"