Pit Babe Au - Tumblr Posts

so i saw this picture and like any normal person my first immediate thought was

change host club show when

and as a totally normal person i immediately set to plot one out so... enjoy, i guess?

part 1/3

bear with me ʕ◉ᴥ◉ʔ

benz as the manager

he is rich, a little spoiled and a lot bratty with divorced parents. after finishing his masters and graduating at the top of his class from a very exclusive business school, his father expects him to come work for some multinational evil corp and fulfil his destiny as the heir. instead, he shows up at his estranged mother’s door, asking to take over the host clubs she owns. what are his motivations, exactly? what is he getting out of this? who knows. but he has a vision and no one is going to be standing in his way.

nut as the investor

benz and nut went to school together and during their freshman year they were - you guessed it - roommates. he is rich, very spoiled and a little bored so once he hears benz has acquired a host club of all things to manage, he simply must check it out. as a man of refined tastes, his first reaction is “you pissed off your daddy for this dump?” which rubs a lot of people the wrong way. not benz, though. benz shrugs and says “if you want better furniture, go buy it.” and when you have more money than sense, might as well, right? nut becomes the club’s new investor and takes a very hands on approach to making sure his investment is going well. aka booking the vip lounge every saturday to entertain himself and his friends and running sassy commentary while refusing to lift a finger to actually help.

pavel as the ex-manager

before benz came along… pavel used to run the place. the club might be one of many in benz’s mother’s nightlife portfolio, kind of forgotten about, but for pavel it is his passion project, his safe space, his. he put his blood, sweat and tears into keeping the place from shutting down and now this rich bitch and his even richer, bitchier friend show up to tear the entire place down and change everything? he gets demoted and sent to work the floor and there is nothing he can do about it. but he sure as hell isn't going to quit - he won't give them the satisfaction and someone needs to make sure they won't turn his home into some tourist trap strip club or drag the staff into shady dealings. not on his fucking watch.

pooh as the boyfriend

pooh is pavel’s boyfriend and they live together in the small apartment above the club, two broke boys style. pooh used to work part-time at the club because he’s studying and well… scholarships don't cover everything and it quickly adds up. however, after benz takes over, pavel wants him nowhere near the place. the vibes are off and he really didn't like the way benz zeroed in on pooh when pooh came down on his way to night class. the thing is, with pavel already so stressed, pooh might have failed to mention how the university decided to cut back on his financial aid and he really, really needs to find a way to make money fast.

this is SOOO GOOD oh mt gosh i need that like right now

change host club show

part 2/3

part one

michael as the bartender

he started working at the club the same week as pavel and they've been a team from the start. while he's glad his menu and bartending flair are one of the few things benz deems acceptable, he shares every single concern pavel has about the future of this place. he lives with his grandmother and has been helping her raise his 5 year old half-sister ever since their deadbeat parents were sent to jail for drug dealing three years ago. before, pavel was always there step up and take his shift when he had to stay / rush home because of an emergency but he seriously doubts benz will be as understanding which terrifies him.

garfield as the pillow princess

garfield is…. plain lazy. he ended up working at the club after searching the internet for “jobs that pay you money without you having to do anything.” sitting and looking pretty is about as much effort as he's willing to make in order to pay rent and really, he would much rather be on his couch with his cat. benz and him get off to a rough start when his new boss tries to force him to take a dance class - “sorry, i don't do cardio” - but after negotiating his way out of it by volunteering to wear cat ears and meow at clients, he figures it's not that bad. it’s pretty great, actually. benz and nut bring in clients who tip way more and soon he's a) negotiating less hours in exchange for wearing scandalous costumes and b) keeping an eye out for a potential sugar daddy.

topten as the dancer

topten is the first hire benz makes in order to elevate the club’s image. he's the younger brother of one of benz’s friends and was recently kicked out his house for blowing a prestigious internship his father arranged for him in a major law firm in favor of joining a dance company. He was classically trained in ballet before moving to contemporary jazz and aerial work and frankly he thinks he is way too good for this gig. benz reminds him that his dad has given him until the end of the month to quit dance or he’ll be financially cut off and being an understudy doesn't pay that much. plus, this way? not only would he be the star, he'd get full(ish) creative control and could choreograph all the performances to his liking.

ping as the bus boy

ping is a quiet introvert who was originally meant to be the bouncer because he is very buff and intimidating but they discovered very quickly that he can't handle any kind of confrontation and he was moved indoors to help out where needed. benz takes one look at him and decides it's time for a promotion because a host like that? ka-ching, baby! unfortunately for benz, capitalism and clients of all gender, ping’s shyness is no joke. he's unable make direct eye contact or string together two words to make a sentence even in a training scenario. he just blushes and becomes a stuttering mess which is a tragedy. does this stop benz from putting him in a size xs vest and making him do plenty of trips to across the floor and have him carry crates of booze and dirty glassware in full view of the club goers? no. it is a business after all.

pop as the hostess

by day pop is a mild-mannered, math loving accountant in thick glasses and grandpa sweaters. by night he becomes miss poppy, the hostess with the mostest. miss poppy - mistress poppy on fridays for her spanks & shots special - is everything accountant pop isn't and the difference is so jarring it takes the new employees months to realize they are the same person. where pop carries himself with hunched shoulders, miss poppy commands attention with easy confidence, towering over the club goers on her platform boots. she is undoubtedly the club’s biggest draw and the second highest earner with sheer volume on her side - really, the only reason the top spot belongs to garfield is because garfield works exclusively in the vip booths with the high rollers and would wear a slutty teletubby costume for a bigger tip.

benz looking like the university student boyfriend of garfield (that no one knows really of hes a businessman, a mafia lord, both or just some guy who really likes black suits

princedinosaur IG story - September 9, 2023