Perfectly Off - Tumblr Posts
Brad couldn't remember. Did he like dogs? He'd ask Chris later. Right now, it was weird he couldn't feel any fur.
The public beach just didn’t click with Brad. How was it his feet could wear thongs but his butt couldn’t? Brad saw nothing wrong with his body. No one could. He was living proof it was the train of thought was offensive. Just one more reason outside of perfection, people scared Brad more than anything. He was glad he wasn’t online. He’d have at least ten thongs on his credit card by now.
On his way to the agency, Chris randomly flash backed to that infamous flight to Geneva. It might be a sign but he didn’t feel like reading right now.
‘Perfectly not trying.’ What did that mean? Was it mean? Chris didn’t understand what the cabin boy was saying. He ALWAYS tried.
After thumbing through Brads many faces, Chris decided it best to hold on to the remark until he forgot it again. If he could only remember how to forget. Now this day wasn’t going so well was it?!
Chris then text Brad to ask where he was going. Brad said the grocery store. Chris replied with a negative. He had to get his check. Where was it?
Brad said it best to ask the check. Chris then apologized. Brad was right. The check needed to speak for itself. It may be paper, but it was still money. Chris really needed to take the corporate rights movement seriously. Businesses weren’t yet people.
Brad’s speedo was once again money. Wasn’t there something he was supposed to loathe about that? Recycled fashion was redundant. Or was it reductive? Damn that Lady Gaga. Her relevance antics kept throwing Brad off. Tea sounded nice. “Yes. Raspberry beret. Thank u.”
Oh thank GAWD! Brad BARELY escaped becoming his and Chris’ biggest fear: PERFECTION. If it wasn’t for that right strap, Brad SOOOO would’ve been there. No one would have believed the pic was real. Boy, that was close. Too close. Brad stopped 4 a minute as a shiver went down his spine. One thing was certain. They’d need 2 hire more perverted blind stylists that doubled as masseuses. Brad would get on that as well as Chris. All this energy needed 2 go somewhere. Chris of course would come first as the stylist had 2 get 2 their next gig.
Becky predicted a short-lived modeling career for Brad and Chris' neighbor, Luke.
It’s my fashion face. Why?
Is it weird?
Please tell me if it’s weird.
Brad never followed up with his boyfriend Chris to clarify who the men were. As everyone else, he left the framed photo on the bedroom dresser to fester with the rest of the pics of sorted family members, needy exes, and unaccounted male friends apparently all named Bruno.
Who can say…
Ugh. This was not what he wanted for his post. Chris swore he had a filter for ‘hot mess.’ This… whatever it was… This was perfect. He didn’t want that.
Ok. This was getting more than annoying. Chris needed to think imperfectly.
Hmmmmm. Maybe Lindsey Lohan had an app… Chris dove in the App Store to find out.
Sure enough, she did not.