I Think I Lost Several Brain Cells After Reading This - Tumblr Posts

Well, smack my ass and call me Susan

I.....I wish that I had the words to truly describe what I’m feeling, but I can’t. And I wish that I had a quote that truly captures the entirety of this story, but I don’t. I’ve never been more at a loss of words. But this is what happens when you put a group of talented writers into one chatroom so I’m not upset at all *plays old town road in the background* 🇺🇸🤠🐴

milkin days | jjk

“There is a stallion that needs to be tamed,” he drawled, sauntering up to her. “And only a lass and her strong milking hands can tame it.” 

pairing: cowboy stripper!jungkook x fem!OC

summary: When the charming but mysterious cowboy Jungkook approaches you, you are positively smitten, drawn to him like a horse to a fresh bucket of feed. Little did you know, however, what dark secret he kept hidden behind those barn doors.

genre: cowboy au, pure crack, smut

warnings: Sexy cowboy slang. Terrible puns. You will be in tears. OC has a name but it is not the name you expect. Dirty talk. There are like 80 different words for grandma. Striptease. You will perhaps think of corn differently after this. Handjob. Surprisingly we were not high while writing this. Jungkook cockadoodle-does you. Unprotected sex. Rough sex. Overstimulation. Creampie. Slight impregnation kink told through farming metaphors. Fertile crops kink. “patriotism”. 

word count: 3.9k

Header by: @kigurumu​

Authors:  @wwilloww​ @thatlongspringnight​ @ot7always​ @kinktae​ @ladyartemesia​ @yoongs-jeontae​ @ezralia-writes​ @moonmintrails​ @jamaiskook​ @sugasp1ce​

A/N: A certified Crackhead Collaboration ⓒ produced by BTS Smut Hub. 

@kinktae​ hates this fic. We would also like to issue the sincerest of apologies to the farming community at large. 

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