I Let Aggie Ramble A Little - Tumblr Posts
" i'm glad it doesn't make you uncomfortable. " agatha tells him with a smile. she feels a bit better about talking about this particular subject, feeling less uneasy and anxious now. to hear nnoitra had been bullied too, it wasn't all that surprising. they'll pick on anyone they know they can, unless that person puts a stop to it, like he did. height can certainly be intimidating, and agatha wasn't very tall as a kid. she certainly isn't tall now, either, still needing step stools and such to reach things on the top shelf in the kitchen and in other places, like libraries and stores. she wasn't so short as to be made fun of for it, though.
when he asks her what she was bullied for, she looks away and fidgets. " i think the list for what i wasn't bullied for would be shorter. " agatha laughs softly, looking back down at the table, then back up at nnoitra. " i wasn't one of the hot girls, though, that's for sure. i was awkward, quiet, shy. that got made fun of. it just made me keep to myself more and more. i was a bit chubby as a kid, too, so... there's that. nothing like being a little kid and hating every fiber of your own being. " she smiles sadly, fidgeting more with one of her rings. " over the summer between that school year and the next, i lost the weight. i didn't need to lose much, but... but then suddenly i was too thin. i wasn't eating enough and i forced myself to skip meals. "
boy, is it unpleasant to remember all of this, or at least, what she could of those years of her life. " even before i needed glasses they were making fun of my eyes. not like i can help being born with a condition that make my eyes look as they do. " another laugh, shaking her head now. " as the bullying progressed, i developed a stutter, so that was made fun of. it wasn't really long before they started getting physical. hair pulling, pushing me against the lockers, shoving me aside, tripping me up in the halls or the cafeteria... they'd destroy my things sometimes, too. rip up my books, shred my notebooks, broke my pens and pencils. my teachers and my parents tried so hard to do something about it all, but you can only suspend them for so long. " agatha shrugs her shoulders.
" people have asked me, 'how can you be traumatized after a little bullying? everyone gets bullied at some point,' and i just tell them they would've had to have been there to understand why it traumatized me. people also say being in school, highschool especially, is the best period of a persons' life, but for me? i... " agatha trails away and shakes her head again, her voice quieting a little when she continues. " i can't look back on those years and feel fond for them. i don't feel nostalgic, i just feel pain. "
YEAH, he should've figured she wasn't the vengeful type. While ( in his experience ) girls could hold grudges for ages, they weren't willing to DO anything about said grudges. Nnoitra... Was not the type to "let things go". If he came across anyone who'd wronged him, no matter how distant the incident, he'd be sure to take the opportunity to get even. It was the manly thing to do. Not to mention it was incredibly satisfying to see people get what they fucking deserved.
But that was because he generally liked seeing people suffer. Not just people who'd wronged him. Agatha wasn't like that. She was gentle. Kind. She didn't wish hurt upon anyone.
He doubted that the bullies regretted what they'd done to her. Which was why they should be MADE to regret it. By getting punished.
Agatha having a completely opposing view to his own might prove to be a problem down the road. For now, Nnoitra didn't care enough to make a big deal out of it. If she didn't want those guys to be punished then... Fine. Whatever.
❝ Mah, 's yer choice, but ya can lemme know if ya change yer mind. ❞ He rolled his shoulders in a shrug. ❝ Ya ain't gotta worry 'bout makin' me uncomfortable, 'cause I ain't like that. ❞ Getting "uncomfortable" wasn't something that happened to him too often, and when it did, it wasn't something he was going to show. He wasn't some pussy ass bitch.
❝ People tried 'ta bully me too, mostly in middle school before I grew this tall. ❞ He brushed his hand over the top of his head, as if to indicate his height. ❝ Of course they learned that I ain't takin' no shit from nobody. ❞ He didn't want himself to look like a victim. He was just trying to make her see that he wasn't completely unsympathetic to her story. Even if he thought her way of handling the bullying had been pretty tragic. Then again - that was the curse of being WEAK, right? You couldn't stand up for yourself so easily. ❝ What did they bully ya 'fer anyway? Ya look more like ya'd be one 'a 'da hot girls. ❞ It was probably a sensitive topic. He should've asked more delicately. Too bad he wasn't like that. He WAS actually trying to be considerate though. He wanted to know, because whatever it was they had bullied her for... Surely that would be one of her insecurities, and he wanted some pointers about what to stay clear of. He might still forget, but at least if he knew what she was insecure about, he could TRY not to comment on it. Whatever it was.