I Legitimately Thought This Through In The Shower - Tumblr Posts

Can you help me?

I’ve thought about this long and hard and decided that I would like my first child’s initials to spell “OTP”. This is a great thought in theory. However, it has been (rudely) brought to my attention that my last name does not begin with the letter “P”. Obviously, this is a big problem if I plan to name my child accordingly. 

I’ve been looking for a spouse with a last name beginning with the letter “P” for a long while now. However, disappointingly, I have yet to find one. I’ve searched everywhere I know of; Craigslist, Amazon, Yahoo, and I’ve even given Etsy a shot. However, I can’t seem to find one (at least not within my price range). 

I really want my child’s initials to spell out “OTP”. I'm partial to the names Ophelia Tana and Owen Troy. Please, if you know of anyway I could procure a husband (preferably) whose name I could take, please let me know immediately. 

(Please view tags.)